Caption contest
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- Date published:
2:25 pm, December 10th, 2011 - 80 comments
Categories: caption contest, humour, national -
Tags: defeat, paula bennett, special votes, waitakere
80 comments on “Caption contest ”
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- Luxon targets are lousy example of leadershipIf talk is cheap, Chris Luxonâs âtargetsâ are bankrupt. ...1 week ago
- Release: Commitment to disability communities missing from Govt prioritiesMinister for Disability Issues Penny Simmonds appears to have delayed a report back to Cabinet on the progress New Zealand is making against international obligations for disabled New Zealanders. ...2 weeks ago
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- Release: National must take mental health seriouslyMental Health Minister Matt Doocey and his Government colleagues have made a meal of their mental health commitments, showing how flimsy their efforts to champion the issue truly are, says Labour Mental Health spokesperson Ingrid Leary. ...2 weeks ago
- Referendums for MÄori wards a racist step backwardsThe Government's imposed referendum on MÄori wards is a racist step backwards for MÄori representation, and disregards Te Tiriti o Waitangi. ...2 weeks ago
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- Thirty six point PR spinThe Governmentâs â36 pointâ plan for the next three months is as pointless as it is hollow. ...2 weeks ago
- Thirty six point PR spinThe Governmentâs â36 pointâ plan for the next three months is as pointless as it is hollow. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Social housing off Governmentâs to-do listThe Coalition Governmentâs refusal to commit to ongoing funding for social housing is seeing the sector pull back on developments and families watch their dreams of securing a home fade away, says Labour Housing spokesperson Kieran McAnulty. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Less money in most peopleâs pockets this AprilChanges to minimum wage and benefit indexation means many New Zealanders will get less this year, as the Government gives a big tax break to landlords instead. ...3 weeks ago
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Prime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with the President of the Philippines, Ferdinand Marcos Jr. The Prime Minister was accompanied by MP Paulo Garcia, the first Filipino to be elected to a legislature outside the Philippines. During todayâs meeting, Prime Minister Luxon and President Marcos Jr discussed opportunities to ...1 hour ago - Government commits $20m to Westport flood protectionThe Government has announced that $20 million in funding will be made available to Westport to fund much needed flood protection around the town. This measure will significantly improve the resilience of the community, says Local Government Minister Simeon Brown. âThe Westport community has already been allocated almost $3 million ...7 hours ago
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- Government focused on getting people into workBenefit figures released today underscore the importance of the Governmentâs plan to rebuild the economy and have 50,000 fewer people on Jobseeker Support, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. âBenefit numbers are still significantly higher than when National was last in government, when there was about 70,000 fewer ...14 hours ago
- Clean energy key driver to reducing emissionsThe Governmentâs commitment to doubling New Zealandâs renewable energy capacity is backed by new data showing that clean energy has helped the country reach its lowest annual gross emissions since 1999, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. New Zealandâs latest Greenhouse Gas Inventory (1990-2022) published today, shows gross emissions fell ...15 hours ago
- Earthquake-prone buildings review brought forwardThe Government is bringing the earthquake-prone building review forward, with work to start immediately, and extending the deadline for remediations by four years, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. âOur Government is focused on rebuilding the economy. A key part of our plan is to cut red tape that ...19 hours ago
- Thailand and NZ to agree to Strategic PartnershipPrime Minister Christopher Luxon and his Thai counterpart, Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin, have today agreed that New Zealand and the Kingdom of Thailand will upgrade the bilateral relationship to a Strategic Partnership by 2026. âNew Zealand and Thailand have a lot to offer each other. We have a strong mutual desire to build ...1 day ago
- Government consults on extending coastal permits for portsRMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Transport Minister Simeon Brown have today announced the Coalition Governmentâs intention to extend port coastal permits for a further 20 years, providing port operators with certainty to continue their operations. âThe introduction of the Resource Management Act in 1991 required ports to obtain coastal ...1 day ago
- Inflation coming down, but more work to doTodayâs announcement that inflation is down to 4 per cent is encouraging news for Kiwis, but there is more work to be done - underlining the importance of the Governmentâs plan to get the economy back on track, acting Finance Minister Chris Bishop says. âInflation is now at 4 per ...1 day ago
- School attendance restored as a priority in health adviceRefreshed health guidance released today will help parents and schools make informed decisions about whether their child needs to be in school, addressing one of the key issues affecting school attendance, says Associate Education Minister David Seymour. In recent years, consistently across all school terms, short-term illness or medical reasons ...2 days ago
- Unnecessary bureaucracy cut in oceans sectorOceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones is streamlining high-level oceans management while maintaining a focus on supporting the sectorâs role in the export-led recovery of the economy. âI am working to realise the untapped potential of our fishing and aquaculture sector. To achieve that we need to be smarter with ...2 days ago
- Patterson promoting NZâs wool sector at International CongressAssociate Agriculture Minister Mark Patterson is speaking at the International Wool Textile Organisation Congress in Adelaide, promoting New Zealand wool, and outlining the coalition Governmentâs support for the revitalisation the sector.  "New Zealandâs wool exports reached $400 million in the year to 30 June 2023, and the coalition Government ...2 days ago
- Removing red tape to help early learners thriveThe Government is making legislative changes to make it easier for new early learning services to be established, and for existing services to operate, Associate Education Minister David Seymour says. The changes involve repealing the network approval provisions that apply when someone wants to establish a new early learning service, ...3 days ago
- RMA changes to cut coal mining consent red tapeChanges to the Resource Management Act will align consenting for coal mining to other forms of mining to reduce barriers that are holding back economic development, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. âThe inconsistent treatment of coal mining compared with other extractive activities is burdensome red tape that fails to acknowledge ...3 days ago
- McClay reaffirms strong NZ-China trade relationshipTrade, Agriculture and Forestry Minister Todd McClay has concluded productive discussions with ministerial counterparts in Beijing today, in support of the New Zealand-China trade and economic relationship. âMy meeting with Commerce Minister Wang Wentao reaffirmed the complementary nature of the bilateral trade relationship, with our Free Trade Agreement at its ...3 days ago
- Prime Minister Luxon acknowledges legacy of Singapore Prime Minister LeePrime Minister Christopher Luxon today paid tribute to Singaporeâs outgoing Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.  Meeting in Singapore today immediately before Prime Minister Lee announced he was stepping down, Prime Minister Luxon warmly acknowledged his counterpartâs almost twenty years as leader, and the enduring legacy he has left for Singapore and South East ...3 days ago
- PMs Luxon and Lee deepen Singapore-NZ tiesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with Singapore Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong. While in Singapore as part of his visit to South East Asia this week, Prime Minister Luxon also met with Singapore President Tharman Shanmugaratnam and will meet with Deputy Prime Minister Lawrence Wong. During todayâs meeting, Prime Minister Luxon ...3 days ago
- Antarctica New Zealand Board appointmentsForeign Minister Winston Peters has made further appointments to the Board of Antarctica New Zealand as part of a continued effort to ensure the Scott Base Redevelopment project is delivered in a cost-effective and efficient manner. The Minister has appointed Neville Harris as a new member of the Board. Mr ...3 days ago
- Finance Minister travels to Washington DCFinance Minister Nicola Willis will travel to the United States on Tuesday to attend a meeting of the Five Finance Ministers group, with counterparts from Australia, the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom. âI am looking forward to meeting with our Five Finance partners on how we can work ...3 days ago
- Pet bonds a win/win for renters and landlordsThe coalition Government has today announced purrfect and pawsitive changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to give tenants with pets greater choice when looking for a rental property, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. âPets are important members of many Kiwi families. Itâs estimated that around 64 per cent of New ...3 days ago
- Long Tunnel for SH1 Wellington being consideredState Highway 1 (SH1) through Wellington City is heavily congested at peak times and while planning continues on the duplicate Mt Victoria Tunnel and Basin Reserve project, the Government has also asked NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) to consider and provide advice on a Long Tunnel option, Transport Minister Simeon Brown ...4 days ago
- New Zealand condemns Iranian strikesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon and Foreign Minister Winston Peters have condemned Iranâs shocking and illegal strikes against Israel.  âThese attacks are a major challenge to peace and stability in a region already under enormous pressure," Mr Luxon says.  "We are deeply concerned that miscalculation on any side could ...4 days ago
- Huge interest in Governmentâs infrastructure plansHundreds of people in little over a week have turned out in Northland to hear Regional Development Minister Shane Jones speak about plans for boosting the regional economy through infrastructure. About 200 people from the infrastructure and associated sectors attended an event headlined by Mr Jones in Whangarei today. Last ...6 days ago
- Health Minister thanks outgoing Health New Zealand ChairHealth Minister Dr Shane Reti has today thanked outgoing Health New Zealand â Te Whatu Ora Chair Dame Karen Poutasi for her service on the Board.  âDame Karen tendered her resignation as Chair and as a member of the Board today,â says Dr Reti. âI have asked her to ...6 days ago
- Roads of National Significance planning underwayThe NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) has signalled their proposed delivery approach for the Governmentâs 15 Roads of National Significance (RoNS), with the release of the State Highway Investment Proposal (SHIP) today, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. âBoosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of the Governmentâs plan to ...6 days ago
- Navigating an unstable global environmentNew Zealand is renewing its connections with a world facing urgent challenges by pursuing an active, energetic foreign policy, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.  âOur country faces the most unstable global environment in decades,â Mr Peters says at the conclusion of two weeks of engagements in Egypt, Europe and the United States.  âWe cannot afford to sit back in splendid ...6 days ago
- NZ welcomes Australian Governor-GeneralPrime Minister Christopher Luxon has announced the Australian Governor-General, His Excellency General The Honourable David Hurley and his wife Her Excellency Mrs Linda Hurley, will make a State visit to New Zealand from Tuesday 16 April to Thursday 18 April. The visit reciprocates the State visit of former Governor-General Dame Patsy Reddy ...7 days ago
- Pseudoephedrine back on shelves for WinterAssociate Health Minister David Seymour has announced that Medsafe has approved 11 cold and flu medicines containing pseudoephedrine. Pharmaceutical suppliers have indicated they may be able to supply the first products in June. âThis is much earlier than the original expectation of medicines being available by 2025. The Government recognised ...7 days ago
- NZ and the US: an ever closer partnershipNew Zealand and the United States have recommitted to their strategic partnership in Washington DC today, pledging to work ever more closely together in support of shared values and interests, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.  âThe strategic environment that New Zealand and the United States face is considerably more ...7 days ago
- Joint US and NZ declarationApril 11, 2024 Joint Declaration by United States Secretary of State the Honorable Antony J. Blinken and New Zealand Minister of Foreign Affairs the Right Honourable Winston Peters We met today in Washington, D.C. to recommit to the historic partnership between our two countries and the principles that underpin itârule ...7 days ago
- NZ and US to undertake further practical Pacific cooperationForeign Minister Winston Peters has announced further New Zealand cooperation with the United States in the Pacific Islands region through $16.4 million in funding for initiatives in digital connectivity and oceans and fisheries research. Â âNew Zealand can achieve more in the Pacific if we work together more urgently and ...7 days ago
- Government redress for Te Korowai o WainuiÄruaThe Government is continuing the bipartisan effort to restore its relationship with iwi as the Te Korowai o WainuiÄrua Claims Settlement Bill passed its first reading in Parliament today, says Treaty Negotiations Minister Paul Goldsmith. âHistorical grievances of Te Korowai o WainuiÄrua relate to 19th century warfare, land purchased or taken ...1 week ago
- Focus on outstanding minerals permit applicationsNew Zealand Petroleum and Minerals is working to resolve almost 150 outstanding minerals permit applications by the end of the financial year, enabling valuable mining activity and signalling to the sector that New Zealand is open for business, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. âWhile there are no set timeframes for ...1 week ago
- Applications open for NZ-Ireland Research CallThe New Zealand and Irish governments have today announced that applications for the 2024 New Zealand-Ireland Joint Research Call on Agriculture and Climate Change are now open. This is the third research call in the three-year Joint Research Initiative pilot launched in 2022 by the Ministry for Primary Industries and Irelandâs ...1 week ago
- Tenancy rules changes to improve rental marketThe coalition Government has today announced changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to encourage landlords back to the rental property market, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. âThe previous Government waged a war on landlords. Many landlords told us this caused them to exit the rental market altogether. It caused worse ...1 week ago
- Boosting NZâs trade and agricultural relationship with ChinaTrade and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay will visit China next week, to strengthen relationships, support Kiwi exporters and promote New Zealand businesses on the world stage. âChina is one of New Zealandâs most significant trade and economic relationships and remains an important destination for New Zealandâs products, accounting for nearly 22 per cent of our good and ...1 week ago
- Freshwater farm plan systems to be improvedThe coalition Government intends to improve freshwater farm plans so that they are more cost-effective and practical for farmers, Associate Environment Minister Andrew Hoggard and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay have announced. âA fit-for-purpose freshwater farm plan system will enable farmers and growers to find the right solutions for their farm ...1 week ago
- New Fast Track Projects advisory group namedThe coalition Government has today announced the expert advisory group who will provide independent recommendations to Ministers on projects to be included in the Fast Track Approvals Bill, say RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Regional Development Minister Shane Jones. âOur Fast Track Approval process will make it easier and ...1 week ago
- Grattan on Friday: Ethnic tensions will complicate the Albanese governmentâs multicultural policy ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra When ASIO boss Mike Burgess delivered his annual threat assessment earlier this year, he stressed the rising danger posed by espionage and foreign interference. âIn 2024, threats to our way of life have surpassed ...31 mins ago - Group plans work to improve safety of female MPs
New research shows harassment of elected officials - especially women - is on the rise. ...2 hours ago - Ukraine warns of WW3 ahead of long-stalled Congress aid voteUkraine's Prime Minister says his country desperately needs the US to approve long-stalled security assistance. ...3 hours ago
- Crown lawyers attempt to block Waitangi Tribunal summons to Minister for ChildrenThe Tribunal had called on Minister for Children Karen Chhour to provide evidence at an urgent inquiry into the repeal of Section 7AA of the Oranga Tamariki Act. ...5 hours ago
- Luxon refuses to guarantee public consultation on AUKUS Pillar 2Prime Minister Christopher Luxon says it's "far too premature" to be confirming whether the public would be consulted on joining AUKUS Pillar 2. ...6 hours ago
- Visualising the 1800s or designing wedding invitations: 6 ways you can use AI beyond generating textSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By T.J. Thomson, Senior Lecturer in Visual Communication & Digital Media, RMIT University Midjourney image by T.J. Thomson As more than half of Australian office workers report using generative artificial intelligence (AI) for work, weâre starting to see this technology affect every ...7 hours ago
- Falls, fractures and self-harm: 4 charts on how kidsâ injury risk changes over time and differs fo...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Lisa Nicole Sharwood, Injury epidemiologist | Expert Witness, UNSW Sydney Sergey Novikov/Shutterstock Injuries are the leading cause of disability and death among Australian children and adolescents. At least a quarter of all emergency department presentations during childhood are injury-related. Injuries can ...7 hours ago
- Choice and control: will NDIS reforms mean people with disability donât get to decide who they liv...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Di Winkler, Adjunct Associate Professor, Living with Disability Research Centre, La Trobe University Shutterstock/Ground Picture Many Australians with disability feel on the edge of a precipice right now. Recommendations from the disability royal commission and the NDIS review were released late ...7 hours ago
- Asbestos in playground mulch: how to avoid a repeat of this circular economy scandalSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Salman Shooshtarian, Senior Lecturer, School of Property, Construction and Project Management, RMIT University Salman Shooshtarian Asbestos has been found in mulch used for playgrounds, schools, parks and gardens across Sydney and Melbourne. Local communities naturally fear for the health of their ...7 hours ago
- Could Albaneseâs bet on homegrown green industries be the boost our regions deserve?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Madeline Taylor, Senior Lecturer, Macquarie University Cloudy Designs/Shutterstock Right now, thereâs a global race underway. The goal: bring back manufacturing and energy jobs as the energy transition speeds up. In 2022, America launched its mammoth Inflation Reduction Act and the ...7 hours ago
- Watch: Prime Minister Christopher Luxon won't say if government will consult public on joining ...Asked multiple times if the public will be consulted on joining the defence pact, Luxon repeatedly said that was yet to be worked through. ...7 hours ago
- Watch live: Prime Minister Christopher Luxon speaks in PhilippinesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon is speaking to reporters on the third leg of his Southeast Asia trip, from Manila in the Philippines. ...8 hours ago
- MÄori lawyers call Shane Jones' Waitangi Tribunal comments 'inappropriate'The MÄori Law Society says his comments breach the principle of the separation of powers and the Cabinet Manual. ...8 hours ago
- Abortions Increase 25% Since Law Change
Family First says that the latest abortion statistics make grim and upsetting reading, with a 25% increase in abortions since the decriminalisation of abortion in March 2020. According to an Official Information Act request received by Right to Life ...9 hours ago - Over Half Of New Zealanders Feel That The Country Is In Decline And That Our Society Is BrokenIpsos New Zealand's inaugural participation in a global study on populism reveals a pervasive sense of societal and economic decline among New Zealanders. MORE DETAILS AND FULL REPORT HERE Ipsos New Zealand's inaugural participation in a global study ...9 hours ago
- Australiaâs new defence strategy is big on ideas, but lacks one key ingredient: well-trained soldi...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Peter Layton, Visiting Fellow, Strategic Studies, Griffith University There have been a lot of defence announcements recently about buying new equipment, building up Australiaâs manufacturing capabilities, creating local jobs, new legislation to support AUKUS and even a new defence chief. In ...10 hours ago
- What does Steve Smithâs Stateside signing mean for cricket in the US â and Australia?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tim Harcourt, Industry Professor and Chief Economist, University of Technology Sydney Steve Smith, one of this generationâs finest batters, has conquered much of the cricketing world during his career, and he now has set his sights on a new frontier: the United ...10 hours ago
- A love letter to Wellington: when i open the shop by romesh dissanayake, reviewed
Madeleine Ballard reviews the debut novel from romesh dissanayake. when I open the shop, the debut novel by Naarm-based Aotearoa writer romesh dissanayake (Sri Lankan, Koryo Saram), is a narrative of grief. Devendra loses his mother, opens a noodle shop on The Terrace, grieves, and emerges changed. But just as ...10 hours ago - Minister Concedes Contractors Will Be Hired To Do Work Of Axed Ministry Of Education StaffThe PSA canât believe that the Minister of Education is happy for her ministry to hire contractors at the same time it is dismissing 565 workers. ...10 hours ago
- Attempt to bar diplomat from Myanmar military junta failsMyanmar community members applied to the courts to bar the diplomat from attending the Association of Southeast Asian Nations. ...10 hours ago
- LGNZ Welcomes Govt Earthquake-prone Buildings DecisionLGNZ has advocated for this decision as part of a remit led by Manawatƫ District Council. ...10 hours ago
- AUKUS Pillar 2 a 'fragrant, methane-wrapped bull***' – Bob CarrThe former Australian Foreign Minister has continued to warn New Zealand against joining the defence pact. ...11 hours ago
- Enforceable undertaking issued to abc accounting services limited after continued non-compliance.The Department of Internal Affairs (DIA) has accepted an enforceable undertaking agreement from ABC Accounting Services Limited (ABC) under section 81 of the Anti-Money Laundering and Countering Financing of Terrorism Act 2009 (AML/CFT Act). ...11 hours ago
- REVEALED: RNZâs Hypocrisy Over Fair Digital News Bargaining BillThe Taxpayersâ Union can reveal that Radio New Zealand (RNZ) spent $71,842.53 on Facebook advertising over the past 12 months, despite earlier this year coming out in support of the Fair Digital News Bargaining Bill , which would force the likes ...12 hours ago
- Police rejected 'very good offer' – Mark MitchellPolice Minister Mark Mitchell says the pay offer rejected by police was the best the government could put forward under difficult financial circumstances. ...12 hours ago
- How can we have truth-telling without the Voice? Our research shows a way forwardSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Heidi Norman, Professor, Faculty of Arts, Design and Architecture, Convenor: Indigenous Land & Justice Research Group, UNSW Sydney Shutterstock The Uluru Statement from the Heart set out the aspirations of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples for âVoice, Treaty, Truthâ, in ...12 hours ago
- NZ education scores must improve â but another polarising ideological pivot isnât the answerSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Bronwyn E Wood, Associate Professor in Education, Te Herenga Waka â Victoria University of Wellington Getty Images You donât need to look hard right now to see concerns about Aotearoa New Zealandâs education system. Declining performance in international testing has been ...12 hours ago
- An updated tally of the public sector job cutsThe coalition government has made it well known it expects departments to cut roles. We break down the numbers as they currently stand. Updated: 12pm, April 18 Before last yearâs election, both National and Act made it clear that the public service was squarely in their crosshairs. Both parties, now ...12 hours ago
- Confessions of an unlikely petrolheadCheckered Flag director Natalie Wilson on her lifelong love of motorsport, and the allure of Pukekohe Park Raceway. One childhood summer when my world revolved around winning stuff off the radio, I bagged tickets to Western Springs Speedway and then to Waikaraka Park in what was a dream season for ...12 hours ago
- 'Ambitious' trade pledge headlines Luxon's Thailand stopThe Prime has announced a commitment to triple two-way trade with Thailand by 2045, but it only requires maintaining current growth. ...12 hours ago
- âThe right personâ: What did Solomon Islanders vote for?By Koroi Hawkins, RNZ Pacific editor in Honiara After a relatively well organised and peaceful day of voting in Solomon Islands yesterday, the electoral commission is working with donor partners to safely transport ballot boxes from polling stations all over the country to centrally located counting venues. It is a ...13 hours ago
- What itâs like to be made redundant by the Ministry of EducationI was one of hundreds of people who lost my government job this week. Hereâs exactly how it played out. It is a Friday. Iâm in the middle of an online Teams hui working out the finer details of a series of workshops weâll be presenting next week. Itâs a ...13 hours ago
- What are âOzempic babiesâ? Can the drug really increase your chance of pregnancy?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Karin Hammarberg, Senior Research Fellow, Global and Women’s Health, School of Public Health & Preventive Medicine, Monash University Joshua Rodriguez/Unsplash Hundreds of thousands of people worldwide are taking drugs like Ozempic to lose weight. But what do we actually know about ...14 hours ago
- Why the kookaburraâs iconic laugh is at risk of being silencedSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Diana Kuchinke, Lecturer in Ecology, Federation University Australia Linda Robertus/Shutterstock Once, while teaching a class of environmental science students in Chinaâs Hebei University of Science and Technology, I asked who knew what a laughing kookaburra was. There were many blank faces. ...14 hours ago
- Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Claire Breen, Professor of Law, University of Waikato smolaw11/Getty Images School truancy has been a concern across the political spectrum for years. But proposed solutions have largely failed to address the core reasons for unexplained school absences. Despite the apparent ...14 hours ago
- âListening is the most important partâ: 10 things students with disability and their families wa...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Melissa Cain, Senior Lecturer in Inclusive Education and Arts Education, Australian Catholic University Agence Olloweb/Unsplash, CC BY About 90% of Australian students with disability attend mainstream schools. Equitable access and participation in education is a fundamental human right. But as last ...14 hours ago
- Will global oil supply be at risk if Iran and Israel pull the Middle East into war?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Flavio Macau, Associate Dean – School of Business and Law, Edith Cowan University Tensions in the Middle East have escalated following Iranâs weekend missile and drone attacks on Israel, heightening concerns of a wider conflict. As with the Russian invasion of Ukraine, ...14 hours ago
- No, getting your boyfriend to peel an orange wonât prove his loyalty. Why TikTok relationship ât...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Edith Jennifer Hill, Associate Lecturer, Learning & Teaching Innovation, Flinders University Shutterstock Have you ever wondered if your partner really loves you? Well apparently so have thousands of TikTok users, who are testing their theories for the world to see. In ...14 hours ago
- New Zealandâs Annual Emissions Fell In 2022, For Third Successive YearThis is the third successive decrease year-on-year. New Zealandâs gross emissions for 2022 were 78.4 Mt CO2-e. ...14 hours ago
- Oranga Tamariki job cuts: 'We can't establish what their endgame is'Oranga Tamariki has failed to explain how hundreds of job cuts will achieve a better outcome for children, a children's advocate says. ...14 hours ago
- Help Me Hera: My parents wonât help out with my kidsThey pressured me to have children, and I had two. Now they wonât lift a finger. Want Heraâs help? Email your problem to helpme@thespinoff.co.nz Hi Hera, I suspect itâs a familiar pattern. Back in the day, as a single gal, I was plagued with questions from my parents about when I would find ...15 hours ago
- Care Workers Call For Fairness On Pay Equity AnniversaryâThe Government has an opportunity here to really correct the course for the care and support workforce, and the people they look after. This cannot be just another area left in the cold, we need real leadership to ensure the proper quality of care ...15 hours ago
- First evidence of ancient human occupation found in giant lava tube cave in Saudi ArabiaSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Mathew Stewart, Research Fellow, Australian Research Centre for Human Evolution, Griffith University The western passage of the Umm Jirsan lava tube. Green Arabia Project If you look from above, you can see thousands of stone structures dotting the landscape of the Arabian ...15 hours ago
- Teachers worry about curriculum, NCEA changes amid staff cutsMore than 500 jobs are likely to be cut at the Education Ministry with concerns about how the curriculum and NCEA changes will now be managed. ...16 hours ago
- Government IT systems need a $800m overhaulThe government is facing a bill of more than $800 million to overhaul back-office IT systems, and attempts to lessen its impact have hit delays. ...16 hours ago
- Over 3,000 public service jobs now proposed to goThe Ministry of Education confirmed a proposal to reduce headcount by 565, while Oranga Tamarikiâs proposal would result in a loss of 447 jobs, writes Anna Rawhiti-Connell in this excerpt from The Bulletin, The Spinoffâs morning news round-up. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign up here. Ministry of ...16 hours ago
- KÄinga Ora delays building projects ahead of reviewKÄinga Ora is unable to say how many new KiwiBuild developments have been delayed as it waits for the outcome of the government's independent review of the state housing agency. ...17 hours ago
- Owners of earthquake prone buildings given four extra years to complete strengtheningA review into the regulations was also being brought forward. ...17 hours ago
- Corrections Accepts Recommendations Following Auckland Prison InspectionThe Inspectorate made three overarching recommendations following the inspection, all of which have been accepted in full by Corrections. ...17 hours ago
- Aucklandâs dumped Commonwealth Games bid has lessons for Christchurch
The crippling cost and complexity of Christchurchâs Commonwealth Games ambitions have become clearer The post Aucklandâs dumped Commonwealth Games bid has lessons for Christchurch appeared first on Newsroom. ...18 hours ago - Oranga Tamariki services for at-risk children will get better after job cuts, minister says"We need to make sure that every dollar we're spending is actually for the benefit of our young people," says Children's Minister Karen Chhour. ...18 hours ago
- How the coalition plans to replace the quickly scrapped MÄori Health AuthorityThe coalition government got rid of the MÄori Health Authority in a hurry. What is it doing now instead? ...19 hours ago
- How to tell if your child is well enough to go to school or is in fact sickDavid Seymour announced new guidelines this week for sending your kids to school with symptoms. Emily Writes sums them up. Parents knee deep in snotty tissues and buckets of vomit were granted a much-welcome reprieve by associate education minister David Seymour on Wednesday with the announcement that he will advise ...19 hours ago
- Weâre asking the wrong questions about treaty settlementsWhen the Crown is the self-appointed ultimate authority over a process to deal with Crown misconduct, we run into big issues, writes Tina Ngata. âWhatâs it going to take for NgÄ Puhi to settleâ was the headliner statement on Q&A last weekend, as NgÄ Puhi chair Mana Tahere was interviewed ...19 hours ago
- Book of the Week: Mothering in late-stage capitalismI think a capitalist patriarchy that relies on monogamous heterosexuality and gender essentialism is the worst system to ensure the survival of our species. Just watch an episode of MAFS Australia. I donât think thereâs anything natural or normal about this system, instead I think itâs a construct kept in ...19 hours ago
- Luxon spreads his wings in ThailandLuxon touched down in Thailand late on Tuesday night, before launching into a packed day of business breakfasts and bilateral meetings in the kingdom’s capital. The visit to Thailand comes after Luxonâs Singapore swing â somewhat of a love-in for the Kiwi Prime Minister, where he shmoozed high-net worth individuals, ...19 hours ago
- New Zealandâs crisis of confidenceThree in five New Zealanders say our country is in decline and our society is broken, exclusive new polling reveals The post New Zealand’s crisis of confidence appeared first on Newsroom. ...19 hours ago
- Daily crossword, Thursday 18 AprilThe post Daily crossword, Thursday 18 April appeared first on Newsroom. ...19 hours ago
- New Zealand broken and in decline, Kiwis sayA global wave of disillusionment and disenfranchisement has not spared New Zealand, with a majority of respondents to a survey here agreeing that New Zealand society is broken and the country is in decline. Ipsos New Zealand asked 1001 Kiwis about their hopes for the future and their views of ...19 hours ago
- Labour all at sea against Govtâs legislative blitzkriegOpinion: The embittered negativity of Labour’s prominent spokespeople is preventing political exploitation of rapid Government change The post Labour all at sea against Govt’s legislative blitzkrieg appeared first on Newsroom. ...19 hours ago
- Staff shortages key to Auckland Prisonâs failure to uphold inmatesâ rightsOpinion: At a time when government departments are shedding workers to fund budgetary cuts, the news that staff shortages have caused prisoners to be in solitary confinement for periods longer than eight months is frightening. This revelation is one of several in the Prison Inspectorate’s most recent report, published ...19 hours ago
- Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 18 AprilLoading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A[quiz],DIV[quiz],A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp'); Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions. The post Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 18 April appeared first on Newsroom. ...19 hours ago
- Police briefings show finances at âtipping pointâThere is a forecast deficit of $120m only brought down to $56m through cost-cutting measures The post Police briefings show finances at ‘tipping point’ appeared first on Newsroom. ...19 hours ago
- Pharmac and the keys to the drug cupboardClose to 3,500,000 prescriptions for paracetamol are written in New Zealand every year. It’s just one of the treatments funded by Pharmac, the drug agency that barters with pharmaceutical companies to get medicines for us at the lowest cost possible. Currently its yearly budget is about $1.5 billion, but apparently ...19 hours ago
- A montage of West Papuan everyday life from hip-hop to protest songsI came to this evening of short films not sure what to expect. I have a history with West Papua (here referring to the Indonesian part of the island of New Guinea, which comprises five provinces, one named âWest Papuaâ) from my days fronting the legendary West Papuan band Black ...24 hours ago
- Ministry of Education plans to cut 565 rolesIt makes the proposal the biggest single slash to a public service agency so far. ...1 day ago
- Oranga Tamariki proposes to cut more than 400 jobsAbout 1900 roles would be affected overall - either changed or disestablished - in the "scope of restructuring work". ...1 day ago
- Politics with Michelle Grattan: Independent MP Dai Le on the church attack in her electorateSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra After the stabbing of Bishop Mar Mari Emmanuel in an Assyrian Orthodox Church in Wakeley on Monday, and the killings in Bondi Junction shopping centre just two days earlier, many people in Sydney and in ...1 day ago
- Government issues guidelines for when sick children should be kept home from schoolCovid-19? Symptoms including fever, vomiting, diarrhoea or head lice? Your children should be at home, new government guidelines say. ...1 day ago
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By the skin of her teeth.
Does this mean I am no longer a westie?
No there’s something wrong with that…
“Does this mean I don’t have to pretend to be a westie”
After all, like being unemployed we have to believe that it is a choice that people make to avoid working.
Oh well, now she is clear to parachute into the North Shore or Howick.
Smile and wave.
Matt Lucas?
Say again?
“Yeah, but no, but yeah, but no, but yeah, but nooooo – anyway I’m still in Parlymint, so shut up!” You are right on the money jps – just like Matt Lucas/Vicky Pollard – or is it Marjorie Dawes from Fatfighters? Just can’t make up my mind! Love to see her in Daffyd’s leather shorts though!!! LOL
Definitely Marjorie: http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/may2009/8/3/marjorie-dawes-pic-pa-582744049.jpg
im so trying not to force one out my ass
Crude funny and effective
đ cos she deserves wot she dishes out Iprent
Ouch, that smarts!
“I ate his liver with some fava beans, and a nice Chianti.”
Back seat of the Holden with yeah yeah coarse I will.
Im still going to screw the benies, bitch
‘You just wait til i get my un-elected hands on you’
Before I answer that one just let me fart. We all do that, right?
Bugger you all. I know my rights.
I’ve been working here for much longer than 90 days
My waters just broke. Phew, I’d be in trouble if I was having another child while still on a benefit.
+1+1+1
I grimace like this to help cover up the shit I talk and that this can be seen in the fact that I do it more as the level of shit I talk increases. Check me out on youtube to see for yourself, here I am here, and nobody can fucking tell – I’m un-fucking-believeable, ou’ tau ya: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3y2QXrHfKL0
These falsies KeY inserted should stop me saying anything for the next three years. Mind you I’ve never said anything meaningful so I can’t understand his insertion on me wearing them. At least I can still smile & wave.
Who cares, we’ve still got John’s two Poodles and three more lined up.
Wagging her tail fresh back from the dog groomer, shunned poodle made to beg for food.
All this comparison of the Key and Banks with poodles is unjust….poodles are smart little creatures capable of love.
Agreed Sunny! I have had three poodles! Banks is neither beautiful or intelligent which poodles are -he’s more like a vicious chihuahua called Noo-Noo on The Dog Whisperer. Dunne is like a spaniel, biddable, can be stubborn, not overly smart. Bennett is definitely NOT like a poodle. She’s a bulldog, stubborn, full of noise,(maybe a bit of drooling, and lots of foul wind) but, mainly, pretty darn thick!
Now you’ve upset the spaniel brigade…..
Sorry Ms X – I love spaniels too, had a Cavalier – he was clever in a sneaky way, but not brilliant like a poodle – spaniels are adorable though, unlike Dunny-Brush!
See the teethwhitening and dental work you taxpayers funded. Only the best for me.
Thought very much the same
“Good thing I paid $$$$ for the teeth whitening before the election”
P.S. Paula – my teeth are full of holes – have to wait for an emergency i.e. they fall out or break before WINZ will fund a trip to the dentist!
Waitakere United debut new look football for 2012
No, I’m not the Joker in disguise. It’s just pure coincidence that I kept referring to the electorate as “West Gotham”.
You’re mean!
I’m going to hold my breath until my face turns blue… Oh wait: it already is!
Fuck John Key, I’m a Joker Fan
I haven’t lost ! any weight with my tax payer funded stomach staple so I have had my teeth wired.
So like bill English I have nothing I can say
Dust? Any dust?
http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/0807/dust-margery-dawes-little-britain-demotivational-poster-1217358276.jpg
Good. She is Paula isn’t she?
“I made the most of a strong welfare system myself, I did” “But why should anyone else get any help”
“it’s all about me! Me! Me!”.
“fuck I lost”.
“Bring me Solo and the Wookie”
Jabba-Dabba Doo!
“I’ll do 12 of you if you can get your vote in quickly”. “bugger it, I’ll do it anyway”.
My teeth aren’t the only thing I’m clenching.
When monkeys bare their teeth watch out!
“I just needed 12 more people to weigh in on my side. Fuck, I weigh more than 12 people, doesn’t that count.”
Shut up Murray, I think I’m about there.
OK then…make it 4 scoops – and throw in a couple of donuts
is that a big fat joint in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?
Hooray are we doing fat jokes ?
here’s one for you all.
http://nx-files.blogspot.com/2011/08/carmel-sepuloni.html
And notice how the pathetic two comments didn’t say a thing about anything Carmel said in the clip. All those TWO people could focus on was what she was wearing. Just take a hike, loser.
To be fair though, that’s a fucking awful cardie.
Runner up in the John Key look-a-like contest!
Uhoooo……Gareth honey – it’s me…Paula.
I am going to sit next to Banksie in the House! Yippee!!!
I just sat on a poor kid, Ooopsie LOLZ
Do I believe that MMPs who lose electorate seats should not be allowed to get in on the list? Yes! of course!oh, oh, wait, that was yesterday, No! No!
Look what twice the dose of smile and wave meds did to me.
11 Votes, what a mandate!
Bennett lost 100’s of votes, in an electorate clearly against her, but split by the Green vote.
“gottle of geer, gottle of geer, gottle of geer……”,
Being beaten fair and square by the better opponent would not have left her grining like a donkey.
Ooh that hurts just a little bit – stick it to me John!
Bubbles DeVere
Call me Bubbles darling, everybody does!’ “Why don’t you take a photo? It lasts longer!”
clip
[lprent: got to fix this bug. ]
Bet there are bubbles – in Paula’s bath!
ouch agh hell
FUK OUCH
That jokey hen has my remote control for my pleasure dispenser
Not really a caption, but if Princess Fiona and the Donkey (in Shrek) were to breed – –
I can only smile and wave at the same time if I concentrate really hard.
Think Toothpaste Advert
“Oh Look, it does get in…NOT ANY MORE!”
Photographer captures the exact moment the collective boot of Waitakere voters hits Paula Bennett’s arse.
Look at me before I go back on the DPB.
lolz
The superglue was essential to holding the smile in place whatever happened, but the the tension in the neck muscles betrayed the jaws’ desire to be prized apart and scream.
I said I wanted a boob job but the Surgeon said Austerity was in so I had a facelift and chin enlargement on a reduced rate, what do think ladies?
“I doesn’t need a “boob” job – “I’s already an enormous boob-y!”
Vacancy: Aviation Adviser, AfPak Border
Vacancy: Lion tamer, previous applicant deceased.
Jenny Craigs best advice for Paula on how to lose weight …. keep your mouth shut!!
I’m totally relaxed.John loves me because I always say and do exactly what he tells me to.He will just bump someone else off the list.Just for me!AND I came first in totally meaningless smiling class.
I’m trying not to leak… your details to the media.
“Behind me you will see some photos of children I intend to destroy through poverty, my smile is fake but I will enjoy seeing them starve”
” I’m now number 9 instead of 14….and you all thought I was too big to fit under the table between JK’s legs”
“Shit, forgot to have my tetanus shot.”
Shut up or I’ll eat you.