Written By: the sprout - Date published: 2:25 pm, December 10th, 2011 - 80 comments
Categories: caption contest, humour, national -
Tags: defeat, paula bennett, special votes, waitakere
By the skin of her teeth.
Does this mean I am no longer a westie?
No there’s something wrong with that…
“Does this mean I don’t have to pretend to be a westie”
After all, like being unemployed we have to believe that it is a choice that people make to avoid working.
Oh well, now she is clear to parachute into the North Shore or Howick.
Smile and wave.
“Yeah, but no, but yeah, but no, but yeah, but nooooo – anyway I’m still in Parlymint, so shut up!” You are right on the money jps – just like Matt Lucas/Vicky Pollard – or is it Marjorie Dawes from Fatfighters? Just can’t make up my mind! Love to see her in Daffyd’s leather shorts though!!! LOL
Definitely Marjorie: http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/may2009/8/3/marjorie-dawes-pic-pa-582744049.jpg
im so trying not to force one out my ass
Crude funny and effective
cos she deserves wot she dishes out Iprent
Ouch, that smarts!
“I ate his liver with some fava beans, and a nice Chianti.”
Back seat of the Holden with yeah yeah coarse I will.
Im still going to screw the benies, bitch
‘You just wait til i get my un-elected hands on you’
Before I answer that one just let me fart. We all do that, right?
Bugger you all. I know my rights.
I’ve been working here for much longer than 90 days
My waters just broke. Phew, I’d be in trouble if I was having another child while still on a benefit.
I grimace like this to help cover up the shit I talk and that this can be seen in the fact that I do it more as the level of shit I talk increases. Check me out on youtube to see for yourself, here I am here, and nobody can fucking tell – I’m un-fucking-believeable, ou’ tau ya: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3y2QXrHfKL0
These falsies KeY inserted should stop me saying anything for the next three years. Mind you I’ve never said anything meaningful so I can’t understand his insertion on me wearing them. At least I can still smile & wave.
Who cares, we’ve still got John’s two Poodles and three more lined up.
Wagging her tail fresh back from the dog groomer, shunned poodle made to beg for food.
All this comparison of the Key and Banks with poodles is unjust….poodles are smart little creatures capable of love.
Agreed Sunny! I have had three poodles! Banks is neither beautiful or intelligent which poodles are -he’s more like a vicious chihuahua called Noo-Noo on The Dog Whisperer. Dunne is like a spaniel, biddable, can be stubborn, not overly smart. Bennett is definitely NOT like a poodle. She’s a bulldog, stubborn, full of noise,(maybe a bit of drooling, and lots of foul wind) but, mainly, pretty darn thick!
Now you’ve upset the spaniel brigade…..
Sorry Ms X – I love spaniels too, had a Cavalier – he was clever in a sneaky way, but not brilliant like a poodle – spaniels are adorable though, unlike Dunny-Brush!
See the teethwhitening and dental work you taxpayers funded. Only the best for me.
Thought very much the same
“Good thing I paid $$$$ for the teeth whitening before the election”
P.S. Paula – my teeth are full of holes – have to wait for an emergency i.e. they fall out or break before WINZ will fund a trip to the dentist!
Waitakere United debut new look football for 2012
No, I’m not the Joker in disguise. It’s just pure coincidence that I kept referring to the electorate as “West Gotham”.
I’m going to hold my breath until my face turns blue… Oh wait: it already is!
Fuck John Key, I’m a Joker Fan
I haven’t lost ! any weight with my tax payer funded stomach staple so I have had my teeth wired.
So like bill English I have nothing I can say
Dust? Any dust?
Good. She is Paula isn’t she?
“I made the most of a strong welfare system myself, I did” “But why should anyone else get any help”
“it’s all about me! Me! Me!”.
“fuck I lost”.
“Bring me Solo and the Wookie”
“I’ll do 12 of you if you can get your vote in quickly”. “bugger it, I’ll do it anyway”.
My teeth aren’t the only thing I’m clenching.
When monkeys bare their teeth watch out!
“I just needed 12 more people to weigh in on my side. Fuck, I weigh more than 12 people, doesn’t that count.”
Shut up Murray, I think I’m about there.
OK then…make it 4 scoops – and throw in a couple of donuts
is that a big fat joint in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?
Hooray are we doing fat jokes ?
here’s one for you all.
And notice how the pathetic two comments didn’t say a thing about anything Carmel said in the clip. All those TWO people could focus on was what she was wearing. Just take a hike, loser.
To be fair though, that’s a fucking awful cardie.
Runner up in the John Key look-a-like contest!
Uhoooo……Gareth honey – it’s me…Paula.
I am going to sit next to Banksie in the House! Yippee!!!
I just sat on a poor kid, Ooopsie LOLZ
Do I believe that MMPs who lose electorate seats should not be allowed to get in on the list? Yes! of course!oh, oh, wait, that was yesterday, No! No!
Look what twice the dose of smile and wave meds did to me.
11 Votes, what a mandate!
Bennett lost 100’s of votes, in an electorate clearly against her, but split by the Green vote.
“gottle of geer, gottle of geer, gottle of geer……”,
Being beaten fair and square by the better opponent would not have left her grining like a donkey.
Ooh that hurts just a little bit – stick it to me John!
Call me Bubbles darling, everybody does!’ “Why don’t you take a photo? It lasts longer!”
[lprent: got to fix this bug. ]
Bet there are bubbles – in Paula’s bath!
ouch agh hell
That jokey hen has my remote control for my pleasure dispenser
Not really a caption, but if Princess Fiona and the Donkey (in Shrek) were to breed – –
I can only smile and wave at the same time if I concentrate really hard.
Think Toothpaste Advert
“Oh Look, it does get in…NOT ANY MORE!”
Photographer captures the exact moment the collective boot of Waitakere voters hits Paula Bennett’s arse.
Look at me before I go back on the DPB.
The superglue was essential to holding the smile in place whatever happened, but the the tension in the neck muscles betrayed the jaws’ desire to be prized apart and scream.
I said I wanted a boob job but the Surgeon said Austerity was in so I had a facelift and chin enlargement on a reduced rate, what do think ladies?
“I doesn’t need a “boob” job – “I’s already an enormous boob-y!”
Vacancy: Aviation Adviser, AfPak Border
Vacancy: Lion tamer, previous applicant deceased.
Jenny Craigs best advice for Paula on how to lose weight …. keep your mouth shut!!
I’m totally relaxed.John loves me because I always say and do exactly what he tells me to.He will just bump someone else off the list.Just for me!AND I came first in totally meaningless smiling class.
I’m trying not to leak… your details to the media.
“Behind me you will see some photos of children I intend to destroy through poverty, my smile is fake but I will enjoy seeing them starve”
” I’m now number 9 instead of 14….and you all thought I was too big to fit under the table between JK’s legs”
“Shit, forgot to have my tetanus shot.”
Shut up or I’ll eat you.
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