web analytics
The Standard
Advertising

Caption Contest

Written By: - Date published: 12:49 pm, November 23rd, 2012 - 82 comments
Categories: accountability, caption contest, david shearer, leadership - Tags:

82 comments on “Caption Contest”

  1. MikeD 1

    Ah.. um… ahh… well… the … ahh…

  2. bobo 2

    “You looking at me? I said are you looking at me ! “

  3. Treetop 3

    It has been such a l o n g week. TGIF.

  4. “Damn,did i get it all wrong 91″
    ‘Yes,Max, you did”

  5. Jimmie 5

    Is it me or does Shearer have an uncanny resemblance to Rodney Hide? (With a little extra hair of course and a few more wrinkles)

  6. McFlock 6

    “Call me ‘too nice’ now, motherfucker! I dare you – no, I double dare you!”

  7. One Tāne Huna 7

    I was talking to a constituent of mine the other day, and he tells me that David Cunliffe has been painting his roof. He said it wan’t fair and I agreed.

  8. McFlock 8

    “I don’t know what the fuck that is, but it sure looks like something I just scraped off my front bench”

  9. PlanetOrphan 9

    Where’s my magnifying glass ?, I’ve got a “White Ant” to burn :twisted:
    Gower get over here M8!

  10. Matthew 10

    “Give me wodka, i want to appear socialist”

  11. oscar 11

    I learned this look from the best warlord of Mogadishu… bitch!

  12. McFlock 12

    “I have had enough of these motherfucking snakes in this motherfucking caucus!”

  13. BlueSilver 13

    Why do I keep hearing John Key’s distant laugh ringing in my ears?

  14. Craig Glen Eden 14

    Read my lips, I play the meanest guitar and I write the song cos Im the leader I will always be the leader and I expect you all to pledge your allegiance for as long as you shall live.

  15. weka 15

    I hope those bastards at the Standard don’t find out I’ve got some darkened curtains and a computer screen of my own.

  16. Chalupa Batman 16

    “So David what is best in life?”

    “Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women”

  17. BM 17

    I’m going to tear you a new arsehole Cunliffe.

  18. Te Reo Putake 18

    David Shearer reads a blog for the first time.

    Jeez, Trevor, who let Lynn Prentice into my conference?

    I can understand Cunliffe’s cheezy grin, but why is Robertson so cheerful?

    Whaddya mean we have no mango skins? How the heck are we going to end poverty then?

    Oi, you, get down off that roof, one of us could get hurt.

    If I try to look like Tony Soprano, do you think Cunliffe will back off?

  19. KhandallaMan 19

    Sh*t, why did I embellish my CV that much?  They believed all the war zone hero crap! Robertson is the only one who knows….I think. Mmmmmmm..should I trust him?

  20. Sunny 20

    The Mr Magoo of speaking ponders his next sound bite.

  21. Mikesh 21

    Hmmm … … … Can’t send the blighter to the Siberian salt mines. I wonder if Stewart Island would be far enough.

  22. Tom Gould 22

    Why is Cunliffe constantly posing, waving into the middle distance, again, like he knows someone in the crowd? Something Brian Edwards suggested he do, I guess?

  23. crashcart 23

    “If I look reeeeaaaaaaaly serious maybe people will take me seriously”

  24. Ant 24

    prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrtttt ……………. pfrrrrt … pfrrt

  25. Rogue Trooper 25

    Committee man keeps his enemies close

  26. fender 26

    Everybody (even Key) is calling me a “nice guy”. I might sound a little simple but I’m not, and I can read between the lines and realise nice guys finish last. I’ll show them I’m as batshit crazy as an Act Party candidate and do some irrational crazy shit wearing this demonic face that even Anthony Dixon couldn’t have done better.

    You WILL dance to my tune or else I’ll smash this guitar over your head.

  27. alex 27

    I think I should grow a beard.

    • Rhinocrates 27.1

      Time for a geek joke. Star Trek: The Next Generation was regarded as pants by Trekkies until Jonathan Frakes (playing 2nd in command Riker), grew a beard. Now “growing a beard” is their shorthand for finally getting your shit together – the opposite of “jumping the shark”.

  28. Mogadishu was never like this.

  29. Populuxe1 29

    Bring me Cunliffe’s heart in this box

  30. Who’s the best man in the front bench now

  31. Luc Hansen 31

    Do you feel lucky, punk?

  32. Tangled up in blue 32

    “Three more months boys, three more months.”

  33. Colonial Viper 33

    ROAR! See, I am the strong man of Labour!

  34. Populuxe1 34

    Mirror, Mirror, on the wall,
    Who is the anointed leader of the Labour Party after all? 

  35. Foreign Waka 35

    Focus, focus, focus, hold still……

  36. Roflcopter 36

    “That’s weird… it feels like there’s something stuck in my back”

  37. calltoaccount 37

    See my forehead? Guess where it’s going…

  38. Clashman 38

    Hi I’m John….no David my er name is er Dave um David.

  39. fustercluck 39

    Looking to the Left. With obvious distaste and suspicion.

  40. PlanetOrphan 40

    Caption contest on “The Standard” ? ya say …. yeah sure M8, any publicity etc (*wink*)
    OK how’s this look? …..
    Do you see a “Leader”?

  41. Rhinocrates 41

    Cunlife… smirking all the time…bastard. I’ll get him. Got to make a show of my authority. Robertson… smirking a lot too… don’t like him. Bastard. I’ll deal to him too. What’s Hipkins doing on telly? Hogging the limelight, that’s what. Bastard. I’ll get him next. Make a show of it. King? Been around, knows too much. Get her. Goff… clearly thinking of a comeback. Bastard. I’ll get him too. Mallard, now him… been there all the time, undermining everyone… I’ll get him. Bastard. Now about Shearer? Who’s that guy? Can’t pin him down. Doesn’t seem to believe in anything. clearly incompetent too – and paranoid. I’ll get him too. Bastard.

  42. Tim G. 42

    Jeez, I sure hope Hooten’s having another BBQ this summer, I could use some more advice.

  43. ‘Make my day Cunliffe,go on, vote for the 40/40/20 split,i dare you’

  44. Dr Terry 44

    I am in great fear – have I gagged everybody?

  45. Mary 45

    Okay, you’ve got me. It started out as a simple prank that got out of control – I really am Wayne Rooney posing as a Labour MP. It’s not my fault you fell for it and made me leader.

  46. geo 46

    “read my lips”

  47. mike e 47

    That fing little weasal gower

  48. Blue 48

    Take me to your leader.

  49. mac1 49

    “Am C D F
    Am C E7 E7
    Am C D F
    Am E7 Am”

  50. jaymam 50

    Do I look like a smiling assassin?

  51. RedBaron 51

    Loser

  52. Vicky32 52

    I see the babies are playing blogosphere again! :)
     
    (Not QoT’s this, is it? Or she’ll jump on me with her size 15 Doc Martins, and flatten me but good.) :D

    • QoT 52.1

      Vicky, you’ll go far in life if you learn how to fucking read.

      Right up there? Under the big bold letters at the top of the post? It says “By: THE SPROUT”.

      This is how you and all the other Standard readers can tell who has made a particular post.

      I’m sorry I’m talking to you like you’re stupid, but the alternative explanation is that once again you just couldn’t help but make a pathetic dig at me for no actual reason, in a thread I’m not even involved in, because you have a truly infantile vendetta against me. So I figured “stupid” was the best conclusion to come to.

      • Vicky32 52.1.1

        but the alternative explanation is that once again you just couldn’t help but make a pathetic dig at me for no actual reason, in a thread I’m not even involved in, because you have a truly infantile vendetta against me.

        Sorry, I couldn’t resist! :)
        To misquote Alexei Sayle, “I prick pretension, but QoT is a pretentious prick”..

        • fender 52.1.1.1

          Seek help from a medical professional, you have an unhealthy obsession.

          • Vicky32 52.1.1.1.1

            Seek help from a medical professional, you have an unhealthy obsession.

            If you mean me. then get a sense of humour! Do you know what the crazy woman said and did the other day? That deserves me poking at her sense of self-importance a bit, hey?

  53. jaymam 53

    Oh all politicians look alike after they’ve been a leader for a while:
    http://i50.tinypic.com/2ev9kia.jpg

  54. xtasy 54

    THIS is NOT a LEADER, he is a “roof-painter’s enemy”!

  55. Ant 55

    ROOF SHOUT

  56. fender 56

    I can burn your portfolio just by staring real hard like this, but please don’t make me do it too often, ‘cos as you can see it makes my skin go all blotchy.

  57. Jim Nald 57

    ” If I am the answer for leading the Labour Party going into the general elections of 2014, what is the question ? “

  58. Saarbo 58

    Well um , I guess I seem to look OK, and ahh, my back story is strong but…… I don’t have any substance and wont really be any good for your long term well being…..”HONEY PUFFS!”

  59. newsense 59

    oho- Spidey sense- the Standard is running a caption contest on me this time! Success! Only 723 to catch Johnny boy…

  60. Ben 60

    Mogadishu, I lost a platoon of men there. They were ambushed and before I could say f…f…f…f…f…f…fire it was all over.

  61. CG 61

    Look!…I am left leaning!

  62. Binders full of women 62

    At least I’m not called a “top of the bus Herne Bay wigger” Nat Radio Sunday am.

  63. Ben 63

    I’ve sorted out Cunliffe, Mangogan style.

  64. Chooky 64

    Hmmmm…..I thought I heard Matthew Hooton say I was Leader of the National Party….Is Matthew going mad?….. or was I just hearing things ?

Important links

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

1 2 3 8

  • Ministers must answer questions on IRD blowout
    The current and previous Revenue Ministers must front up and explain how the child support system had a budget blowout from $30 million to $210 million in just four years, says Labour’s Revenue spokesperson Clayton Cosgrove. “Peter Dunne was Revenue… ...
    7 hours ago
  • Curb stratospheric public CEO salaries
    A review of the way MPs’ pay is set should also look at ways to curb excessive rises in the salaries of public service chief executives, Labour Leader Andrew Little says. “Some of these CEOs have had stratospheric pay increases… ...
    11 hours ago
  • 50 cents? Makes no sense.
    The minimum wage rose by 50 cents this month from 14.25 to 14.75. While it’s a small step towards ensuring minimum workers get a fair share, it’s important to remember that real wages only rose 1.5% while productivity rose by… ...
    GreensBy Denise Roche MP
    1 day ago
  • The Serco corrections circus
    It should seem obvious to employers, private or public, that it’s important to do what you can to retain your best, most experienced staff. They make life easier for you because they’re effective, attentive and often respected by those around… ...
    GreensBy David Clendon MP
    1 day ago
  • Time for NZ to prohibit the killing of great apes
    That ban was widely hailed, and spurred efforts in other countries to get similar bans. However, apes are still being exploited, abused and killed, both in captivity and in the wild. Examples of cruelty, neglect and abuse abound. Apes are… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    4 days ago
  • Auckland building consents: Tragic
    The only word to describe the latest building consent figures for Auckland is ‘tragic’, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “Whatever the Government is doing to address the Auckland housing crisis, it is clearly not working. ...
    4 days ago
  • A whiff of a new biosecurity scandal?
    A pest which could create havoc for New Zealand’s horticulture and agriculture sector must be as much a focus for the Government as hunting out fruit flies, Labour’s Biosecurity spokesperson Damien O’Connor says. “While the Ministry for Primary Industries is… ...
    4 days ago
  • Government shrugs off health sector crisis
    Despite new evidence showing that cuts to health spending are costing lives the Government continues to deny the sector is struggling, Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette King says. “Health services in New Zealand are in crisis. ...
    5 days ago
  • Parata lowered the bar for failing charter school
    When Hekia Parata became aware that the Whangaruru charter school was experiencing major problems her first action was to drop standards by reducing the number of qualified teachers they had to employ, Labour’s Education spokesperson Chris Hipkins has revealed. “Hekia… ...
    5 days ago
  • National not being straight about the economy
    John Key and Bill English need to be straight with New Zealanders about the damage their failure to diversify the economy is doing, after new figures show export growth plunged due to a collapse in dairy exports, says Grant Robertson.… ...
    5 days ago
  • Mind the Gap
    This week the International Monetary Fund released a report on the wider economic value in closing the gender pay gap. When even the bastions of free-market economics start to raise concerns about gender pay gaps, we have to realise how… ...
    GreensBy Jan Logie MP
    5 days ago
  • Labour will hold National to parental leave promise
    Labour will hold National to its promise to increase the support given to new parents of premature, multiple birth and babies born with disabilities, Labour’s paid parental leave campaigner Sue Moroney says. "I am naturally disappointed that after battling for… ...
    6 days ago
  • It was all just pillar talk
    Steven Joyce’s confession that he can no longer guarantee a pillar-free design for the New Zealand International Convention Centre shows the Government has abandoned its dream of creating an ‘iconic’ ‘world-class’ structure, says Labour Economic Development spokesperson David Clark. “Steven… ...
    6 days ago
  • Australians move on offshore speculators
    John Key might want to have a quiet word with Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott about Canberra's just-announced crack down on offshore speculators when he visits New Zealand this week, Labour's Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says."Tony Abbott's centre right government… ...
    6 days ago
  • Government at odds on overseas driver crashes
    National backbencher Jacqui Dean has spoken out about overseas driver crashes, putting herself at odds with Prime Minister John Key who is on record as saying it’s not a big issue, Labour’s Transport spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “I’m not surprised… ...
    6 days ago
  • Human Rights and the Palestine Crisis
    Last week I heard two Palestinians speak at Wellington events about the ongoing crisis in their country. Samar Sabawi spoke to a full house about the history of Palestine and gave us a lucid and disturbing account of the situation… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    6 days ago
  • Time to take real care of our kids
    An Amnesty International report has once again criticised New Zealand’s track record on looking after our kids, Labour’s Children’s spokesperson Jacinda Ardern says. The annual report, which looks at global human rights abuses highlights not only the fact that high… ...
    6 days ago
  • John Key wrong about Labour’s war vote
    John Key’s desperate claims that the former Labour Government didn’t put combat troop deployment to a Parliamentary vote are simply wrong, Labour’s Defence spokesperson Phil Goff says. “It was disgraceful that the Prime Minister ran rough shod over democracy and… ...
    6 days ago
  • Māori language bill needs work
     It is clear that the first draft of the Māori Language Bill was about structures and funding rather than the survival of te reo Māori, Labour’s Māori Development Spokesperson Nanaia Mahuta says.  “Labour is pleased that the Minister of Māori… ...
    6 days ago
  • Report proves troubled school shouldn’t have opened
    The long-awaited release of an Education Review Office report into Northland’s troubled Whangaruru charter school proves it should never have been approved in the first place, Labour’s Education spokesperson Chris Hipkins says. “This report identifies problems with absenteeism and disengaged… ...
    1 week ago
  • Manus Island and the New Zealand Government
    This week the Greens have participated in awareness activity about Manus Island, the refugee camp on an island in Papua New Guinea where Australia dumps asylum seekers. John Key says that he has every confidence in the Australian Government’s claim… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Election Inquiry – Getting accessible voting on the agenda
    James Shaw has been doing a series of blogs on the Election Inquiry into last year’s general election.  I thought this was a great opportunity to raise an issue very dear to me – accessible voting. Last year’s general election… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    2 weeks ago
  • RMA changes no solution to Christchurch housing
    Housing will continue to be a big issue in 2015. The latest Consumer Price Index, released last month, shows both good news and bad news on the housing front. After years of being the most expensive place to build a… ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Saving kokako in South Auckland’s Hunua Ranges
    It is amazing that you can hear the song of the endangered North Island kokako in South Auckland’s Hunua Ranges, less than 50 kms from the central city. A heavy schedule of policy workshops at the Green Party’s Policy… ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Let’s not turn a blind eye to human rights
    The Cricket World Cup has just opened in New Zealand, and it’s an opportunity for us to shine on the world stage. International sport can be a chance for us to build relationships with other countries, and examine what it… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Its Just Not Cricket
    This week it was my privilege to work with Sri Lankan Tamil communities in this country and host Australian journalist and human rights advocate Trevor Grant. I knew a bit about Trevor from his biography but I didn’t know just… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Time for NZ to #BeCrueltyFree
    The Government is about to progress the final stages of the Animal Welfare Amendment bill. This will be our last opportunity to get changes made to improve the bill to ensure a better outcome for animals. I have put forwards… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    3 weeks ago
  • We want access!
    Access to buildings is a big issue for many New Zealanders. It looks like that, due to the hard work and persistence of people in the disability community, the Government may finally be starting to take access to buildings seriously.… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    3 weeks ago
  • Greens call on Super Fund to divest from fossil fuels
    The Green Party today called on the New Zealand Superannuation Fund (the Fund) to divest from fossil fuels, starting immediately with coal. The call was accompanied with a new report, Making money from a climate catastrophe: The case for divesting… ...
    GreensBy Russel Norman MP
    3 weeks ago
  • Young Kiwis’ housing crisis
    Shelter is a fundamental human need along with food, water and clean air. All humans need adequate shelter; it’s a human right. Warm, safe, stable accommodation is critical for young people to be able learn and grow and just be.… ...
    GreensBy Jan Logie MP
    3 weeks ago

Removed at the request of The Daily Blog.
Public service advertisements by The Standard

Current CO2 level in the atmosphere