Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 1:00 pm, May 9th, 2014 - 145 comments
Categories: caption contest - Tags:

Key Slater Farrar

145 comments on “Caption contest ”

  1. Andre 1

    Bottom feeders….

  2. shorts 2

    No ties

  3. Philj 3

    xox
    Pro whaling investors meet in brothel.

  4. tc 4

    the 3 stooges, troughy, shonky and blubby

  5. risildowgtn 5

    Creatures from the deep, Penguin, Lobster butt licker, and wail boil

  6. key:..’collins will soon be sleeping with these fishes..’

  7. farrar proudly shows off the results of the recent sewing-course-holiday he went on..

    ..apparantly he whipped it up from his aunties’ old curtains..

  8. key with two customers/consumers at the man-bra trade-show….

  9. they look far too happy..

    ..whose goosing who..?

  10. p.m. meets tr*lls…

  11. ruup 12

    “Yes I’m stuck in the middle with you,
    And I’m wondering what it is I should do,
    It’s so hard to keep this smile from my face,
    Losing control, yeah, I’m all over the place,
    Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right,
    Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.”

    by Stealers Wheel

  12. blue leopard 13

    Three unidentified guests who visited the aquarium were asked to leave because they were scaring the fish and other guests with the vacuous grins they had plastered on their faces.

    The aquarium owners raised an alert to the police and the three (pictured above) were arrested on the way out for possession and use of the popular synthetic highs, ‘A Brighter Future’, ‘Rockstar Economy’, ‘An Economic Surplus Exists’ and ‘It is all Labour’s Fault’ which have now been banned due to the damage they are causing the country.

    • greywarbler 13.1

      bl +100 Those numbers sound foot tappy – sound like hits to me.
      Then again ruups choice is a goer too.

      • blue leopard 13.1.1

        Thanks, greywarbler, I was hoping someone would get amusement from that 🙂

  13. p.m. meets staff @ ‘chins ‘r us’…

  14. JanM 15

    Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf?

  15. thatguynz 16

    Moe, Larry and Curly venture out to the aquarium.

  16. p.m. meets judith collins’ support-group..

  17. Treetop 18

    Spinning themselves into one big knot.

  18. national party insiders select a burial-place for collins’ career…

  19. Treetop 20

    PM approves of Collin’s support group.

  20. Clemgeopin 21

    The three tie-less tricksters.

  21. Andre 22

    Ahhhhhh! . . . . Butt plugs

  22. greywarbler 23

    I think we brought it off lads!

  23. greywarbler 24

    That last gig paid well. Now it’s off to trough again. See you soon!

  24. this years’ finalists in the annual dirt-file-competition..

  25. the ayn rand appreciation society..

  26. three picketty refuseniks..

  27. Clemgeopin 28

    FOR SALE ! : Three bums.

  28. p.m. meets winner and runner-up of the annual pie-eating competition..

  29. Philj 30

    xox
    Which one likes Chinese?

    • greywarbler 30.1

      Is there a nice plump beneficiary in that tank of future dinners at my back? Why eat the rich? I could never understand what that film was on about!

  30. Papa Tuanuku 31

    see no evil

  31. George 32

    Friends are priceless.

    For everything else there’s a donation.

  32. Tiger Mountain 33

    “The Three Amigos II–Chamber of Tory Horrors cut”
    –starring three slippery dirty dodgepots–Mincer, Prime Mincer and can’t Bee f’ooked.

  33. Puckish Rogue 34

    “NZs most popular PM of the MMP era and the two most popular political bloggers in NZ share a photo” 🙂

    • Enough is Enough 34.1

      Helen Clark was Prime Minister for three terms with strong opular support throughout. She would have been Prime Minister for four terms had it not been for the Corporate Media’s corrupt witch hunt of Winston Peters.

      So no he is not the most popular Prime Minister. He is without doubt the most hated and certainly the most incompentent.

      As for the bloggers I think you will find they fudge their numbers somewhat

  34. (ya gotta love that oxford dictionary of quotations..this was written in 1681…)

    “..in friendship false..implacable in hate..

    ..resolved to ruin or to rule..the state..”

  35. This year’s 1980s WWF wrestling reunion features Andre the Giant, the Million Dollar Man, and Tugboat.

    • Puckish Rogue 36.1

      Nice 🙂

    • Treetop 36.2

      Jack and the beanstalk, (whale oil giant, Key Jack, Farar the golden goose). The end, when Jack chopped the beanstalk down.

  36. John Williams 37

    “The New Zealand National Government in all it guises.”

  37. Gooch 38

    Meet the candidates for the Lemon Party

  38. BLiP 39

    Fishy, definitely fishy.

  39. the pigman 40

    Aquarium’s prized penguin and sickly sperm whale stolen from their tanks during daring heist by an unidentified guest.

  40. Ed 41

    We have a cunning plan.

  41. One Anonymous Bloke 42

    We need better wingnuts.

  42. Clemgeopin 43

    The Cabinet Rub.

  43. Andre 45

    IRD looking for information concerning ……….

  44. Chooky 46

    Happy as Pigs in mud

  45. chris73 47

    “One of us, one of us”

  46. Jrobin 48

    Two donors compete for time with renowned Cabinet Club member.

  47. Paul Campbell 49

    “Cabinet Club”, it’s all about amateur carpentry right …. you believe me don’t you? please ….

  48. Jackal 50

    Do you, smiling assassin, take this slightly soiled blogger to be your lawfully wedded propagandist? I do.

    Do you, former Truth editor, take this snake oil salesman to be your sugar daddy and secret funder? I do.

    Do you, Muldoonist, promise to repress free speech and democracy at every chance? I do.

    Do you, climate change denier, accept the doctrine of neoliberalism for all eternity. I do.

    I now pronounce you corporatist and propagandist.

    You may bribe the press.

  49. Clemgeopin 51

    A head honcho with two paunchos.

  50. Clemgeopin 52

    A dick with two dickheads.

  51. Clemgeopin 53

    A twit with two nitwits.

  52. philj 54

    xox
    Jackal wins the booby prize. 😉

  53. Clemgeopin 55

    Honest John with two bosom buddies.

  54. anker 56

    Key in damage control mode – attempts to create the perception of of the National Party as a moral, decent party . by hanging out with Slater and Farar.

  55. anker 57

    Key in damage control mode – attempts to raise the National Party’s standards and morality by hanging out with Slater and Farar.

  56. dave 58

    truth ,integrity,morality HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHpond scum x3

  57. captain hook 59

    the thing, the blob and the creature from the black lagoon

  58. dave 60

    thruth ,intergrety,morality

  59. Will@Welly 61

    an arse between two asses.

  60. O masters, if I were disposed to stir
    Your hearts and minds to mutiny and rage,
    I should do David wrong and John wrong, and Cameron wrong,
    Who, you all know, are honourable men

    Julius Caesar, ACT III Scene II. The Aquarium.

  61. karol 63

    ‘armless trio? Joined at the hip?

  62. Jackal 64

    May I kiss your arse with this shit eating grin Prime Minster?

  63. Rob 65

    ideas bereft blog recycles three year old photograph in vain attempt to remain relevant

    • @rob..

      ..rightwinger confirms the given that all rightwingers have a sense of humour bye-pass at birth..

      ..(the nearest they get to humour are those hard/brittle sneers at those they consider their inferiors..

      ..and we should feel sorry for them..

      ..that must be hell/dire..

      ..the grinding grey life of no ha-ha!..

      ..no wonder they are so angry..

      ..the poor luvvies..!

      • phillip ure 65.1.1

        seriously..!

        ..the challenge is..name one funny rightwing comedian..

        ..there aren’t any..

        ..that’s ‘cos all rightwingers are humourless arsewipes..

        ..who had s.o.h. bye-passes at birth..

        ..q.e.d…

  64. TeWhareWhero 66

    When shall we three meet again?
    To swindle, hoodwink and complain?
    When the double-dealing’s done,
    When the election’s lost or won?

  65. pm meets laboratory-experiments that went terribly terribly wrong…

  66. pm and his dirt-file meet runner-up in cartman-look-alike contest..

  67. Naki Man 69

    Well done Cam for wining the best blog award tonight

    • Clemgeopin 69.1

      If THAT is voted the best blog, it says more about the low calibre of the voters than anything else!

    • Jackal 69.2

      Influx of rightwing commentators congratulating Cameron Slater finally makes this blog relevant. /sarc

    • Awww 69.3

      And well done to Canon, the official paper supplier to the WhaleOil blog for it’s continuing support of far right hate speech.

  68. rod 70

    The PM with his speechwriters.

    • Will@Welly 70.1

      Wrong. Given the P.M.’s nasal qualities, try “P.M. with his screech writers.”

  69. Naki Man 71

    The most popular PM and the most popular bloggers in New Zealand

    • adam 71.1

      Naki Man doing shit trolling since, well not very long – and man, your just really bad at it. Just go back and smoke some crack with the rest of the whale oil crowd, or smell your own farts – hey what ever rocks your smug little world.

  70. georgecom 72

    with apologies to Sesame Street

    Three of these things are just like the others,
    Three of these things just do not belong,
    Can you tell which things are just like the others
    By the time I finish my song?

    Three of these things belong together
    Three of these things are kind of the same
    Can you guess which one of these doesn’t belong in Parliament?
    Now it’s time to play our game (our fundraising game).

  71. TeWhareWhero 73

    A bad political sandwich – the bread is too thick and the filling is not what it claims to be.

  72. Pdubyah 74

    Dumb, dumber, dumbest.

  73. georgecom 75

    Key poses for picture at pie warmer technicians convention.

  74. Murray Olsen 76

    Farrar: gosh these guys are lucky to be with me.
    Key: ashlee tease gays a luggy to be with me.
    Blubber Boy: aahh, oooh, aaah, oops………anyone got a tissue?

  75. Stuart Munro 77

    Rightswingers! The club for those whose mums and siblings resist ACT policy…

  76. another meaning of wobh..(in abbrev.-dict..)

    ..is ‘weight of both horns’..

    ..(think about it..!..)

  77. Ian 79

    Key Burger

  78. felix 80

    Vizzini and Fezzik. And an unnamed guest.

  79. Linz 81

    Delusion, greed and hate: the three unwholesome roots.

  80. captain hook 82

    one pig, two pokes.

  81. burt 83

    Is this really all it takes to make Labour look like sock puppets.

  82. Enough is Enough 84

    Someones been eating too many dead rats

  83. Clemgeopin 85

    The honey hive and the two Bs.

  84. joe90 86

    Eh-oh!, Dipsy, Laa-Laa, and Tinky Winkyon are here and Po‘s on her way.

  85. tricledrown 87

    Which one is the vintriloquist.
    PinoKeyO finds it easy to operate his dummy with the whaleoil providing more than adequate lubrication to manipulate such a large Dummy.

  86. tricledrown 88

    Cabinet Club meeting with PM .
    Fishy business as National tanks (aqarium in back ground gives it away) in the polls Jamie whyte of ACT sends incestious minders to arrange a polygamus 3 way gay marriage as part of pre election tom linettnegotiations whyte says this is the bottom line to any post election deal.

  87. Ecosse_Maidy 89

    Keys: “Sorry Lads, The National Underground Aquarium Bunker was the only place, I could think of to meet, without that ****** Pete George arriving and interrupting….Double check that door is locked will u?

  88. Ecosse_Maidy 90

    Keys ” Ok, how do we deny climate change now Gents now the sea water is over my holiday retreat windows?”

  89. Yossarian 91

    Keys: Ok, We have been here for three bloody days! One of us has to go and check out what’s up top and see if Cyclone Judith has left anything behind



  90. Ecosse_Maidy 92

    Ok We have been here for three bloody days now!!!! One of us has to go and check out what’s up top and see if Cyclone Judith has left anything behind

..

  91. Clemgeopin 93

    Whose turn is it to pass a leak today, yours or mine?

  92. Ecosse_Maidy 94

    The three new directors of the offshore drilling company gathered for the first time….Hale oil was now in business.

  93. Ecosse_Maidy 95

    Keys: Thank fuck they can’t see what we are doing with our dicks!

  94. emergency mike 96

    Rusty the goldfish with three unidentified bloggers.

  95. Ecosse_Maidy 97

    Rusty the gold fish makes generous donation of thirty thousand dollars to the national party troika for allowing him to stay in the country.

  96. Gooch 98

    Dutch Rudder enthusiasts pose for a photo outside their annual conference

  97. Ecosse_Maidy 99

    Rusty the goldfish , unveiled as Pete George in cheap disguise

  98. Ecosse_Maidy 100

    Rusty the goldfish promoted to Minister of Justice and Immigration.

  99. Ecosse_Maidy 101

    Rusty the Goldfish, resigns in fury, as his expenses are questioned,,,,,then proceeds to sell his memoirs…

  100. Ecosse_Maidy 102

    Rusty the goldfish gets awarded Knighthood and retires to Hawaii to play golf

  101. Ed 103

    We have a cunning plan . . . . . . .for the fish droppings

  102. Clemgeopin 104

    ‘UNITED WE STAGGER, DIVIDED WE FALL’

  103. jaymam 105

    DPF and Whaleoil with an unidentified guest.
    P.S. thanks to Norrie Montgomery for the photo that was copied from Facebook (the “I’m voting National” page)!

  104. adam 106

    Working for the 1% – from here to eternity.

  105. TeWhareWhero 107

    What’s going through their minds……

    Farrar: “Please hurry up and take the picture, someone’s eating all the cake!’

    Key: ‘Oh god, Slater’s just farted, hurry up and take the bloody picture!’

    Slater: “Omigod, I just farted next to the PM. Hurry up and take the picture!’

    • Ecosse_Maidy 107.1

      Rusty the goldfish took that fart wrapped it up and called it the national party

  106. Jenny 108

    Following major re-constructive surgery, by a world leading team of expensive private sector surgeons, and a long period of recuperation.

    On making a full recovery Mr Creasote bravely returns to the scene of his unfortunate accident.

    (The surgeons finding so much human tissue, Mr Creasote was mistakenly reassembled into three discrete individuals)

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    2 days ago
  • How Many Watts Does a Laptop Use? Understanding Power Consumption and Efficiency
    Laptops have become essential tools for work, entertainment, and communication, offering portability and functionality. However, with rising energy costs and growing environmental concerns, understanding a laptop’s power consumption is more important than ever. So, how many watts does a laptop use? The answer, unfortunately, isn’t straightforward. It depends on several ...
    2 days ago
  • How to Screen Record on a Dell Laptop A Guide to Capturing Your Screen with Ease
    Screen recording has become an essential tool for various purposes, such as creating tutorials, capturing gameplay footage, recording online meetings, or sharing information with others. Fortunately, Dell laptops offer several built-in and external options for screen recording, catering to different needs and preferences. This guide will explore various methods on ...
    2 days ago
  • How Much Does it Cost to Fix a Laptop Screen? Navigating Repair Options and Costs
    A cracked or damaged laptop screen can be a frustrating experience, impacting productivity and enjoyment. Fortunately, laptop screen repair is a common service offered by various repair shops and technicians. However, the cost of fixing a laptop screen can vary significantly depending on several factors. This article delves into the ...
    2 days ago
  • How Long Do Gaming Laptops Last? Demystifying Lifespan and Maximizing Longevity
    Gaming laptops represent a significant investment for passionate gamers, offering portability and powerful performance for immersive gaming experiences. However, a common concern among potential buyers is their lifespan. Unlike desktop PCs, which allow for easier component upgrades, gaming laptops have inherent limitations due to their compact and integrated design. This ...
    2 days ago
  • Climate Change: Turning the tide
    The annual inventory report of New Zealand's greenhouse gas emissions has been released, showing that gross emissions have dropped for the third year in a row, to 78.4 million tons: All-told gross emissions have decreased by over 6 million tons since the Zero Carbon Act was passed in 2019. ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 days ago
  • How to Unlock Your Computer A Comprehensive Guide to Regaining Access
    Experiencing a locked computer can be frustrating, especially when you need access to your files and applications urgently. The methods to unlock your computer will vary depending on the specific situation and the type of lock you encounter. This guide will explore various scenarios and provide step-by-step instructions on how ...
    2 days ago
  • Faxing from Your Computer A Modern Guide to Sending Documents Digitally
    While the world has largely transitioned to digital communication, faxing still holds relevance in certain industries and situations. Fortunately, gone are the days of bulky fax machines and dedicated phone lines. Today, you can easily send and receive faxes directly from your computer, offering a convenient and efficient way to ...
    2 days ago
  • Protecting Your Home Computer A Guide to Cyber Awareness
    In our increasingly digital world, home computers have become essential tools for work, communication, entertainment, and more. However, this increased reliance on technology also exposes us to various cyber threats. Understanding these threats and taking proactive steps to protect your home computer is crucial for safeguarding your personal information, finances, ...
    2 days ago
  • Server-Based Computing Powering the Modern Digital Landscape
    In the ever-evolving world of technology, server-based computing has emerged as a cornerstone of modern digital infrastructure. This article delves into the concept of server-based computing, exploring its various forms, benefits, challenges, and its impact on the way we work and interact with technology. Understanding Server-Based Computing: At its core, ...
    2 days ago
  • Vroom vroom go the big red trucks
    The absolute brass neck of this guy.We want more medical doctors, not more spin doctors, Luxon was saying a couple of weeks ago, and now we’re told the guy has seven salaried adults on TikTok duty. Sorry, doing social media. The absolute brass neck of it. The irony that the ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 days ago
  • Jones finds $410,000 to help the government muscle in on a spat project
    Buzz from the Beehive Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones relishes spatting and eagerly takes issue with environmentalists who criticise his enthusiasm for resource development. He relishes helping the fishing industry too. And so today, while the media are making much of the latest culling in the public service to ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    2 days ago
  • Again, hate crimes are not necessarily terrorism.
    Having written, taught and worked for the US government on issues involving unconventional warfare and terrorism for 30-odd years, two things irritate me the most when the subject is discussed in public. The first is the Johnny-come-lately academics-turned-media commentators who … Continue reading ...
    KiwipoliticoBy Pablo
    2 days ago
  • Despair – construction consenting edition
    Eric Crampton writes – Kainga Ora is the government’s house building agency. It’s been building a lot of social housing. Kainga Ora has its own (but independent) consenting authority, Consentium. It’s a neat idea. Rather than have to deal with building consents across each different territorial authority, Kainga Ora ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    2 days ago
  • Coalition promises – will the Govt keep the commitment to keep Kiwis equal before the law?
    Muriel Newman writes – The Coalition Government says it is moving with speed to deliver campaign promises and reverse the damage done by Labour. One of their key commitments is to “defend the principle that New Zealanders are equal before the law.” To achieve this, they have pledged they “will not advance ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    2 days ago
  • An impermanent public service is a guarantee of very little else but failure
    Chris Trotter writes –  The absence of anything resembling a fightback from the public servants currently losing their jobs is interesting. State-sector workers’ collective fatalism in the face of Coalition cutbacks indicates a surprisingly broad acceptance of impermanence in the workplace. Fifty years ago, lay-offs in the thousands ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    2 days ago
  • What happens after the war – Mariupol
    Mariupol, on the Azov Sea coast, was one of the first cities to suffer almost complete destruction after the start of the Ukraine War started in late February 2022. We remember the scenes of absolute destruction of the houses and city structures. The deaths of innocent civilians – many of ...
    2 days ago
  • Babies and benefits – no good news
    Lindsay Mitchell writes – Ten years ago, I wrote the following in a Listener column: Every year around one in five new-born babies will be reliant on their caregivers benefit by Christmas. This pattern has persisted from at least 1993. For Maori the number jumps to over one in three.  ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    2 days ago
  • Should the RBNZ be looking through climate inflation?
    Climate change is expected to generate more and more extreme events, delivering a sort of structural shock to inflation that central banks will have to react to as if they were short-term cyclical issues. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāMy pick of the six newsey things to know from Aotearoa’s ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 days ago
  • Bernard's pick 'n' mix of the news links
    The top six news links I’ve seen elsewhere in the last 24 hours, as of 9:16 am on Thursday, April 18 are:Housing: Tauranga residents living in boats, vans RNZ Checkpoint Louise TernouthHousing: Waikato councillor says wastewater plant issues could hold up Sleepyhead building a massive company town Waikato Times Stephen ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 days ago
  • Gordon Campbell on the public sector carnage, and misogyny as terrorism
    It’s a simple deal. We pay taxes in order to finance the social services we want and need. The carnage now occurring across the public sector though, is breaking that contract. Over 3,000 jobs have been lost so far. Many are in crucial areas like Education where the impact of ...
    2 days ago
  • Meeting the Master Baiters
    Hi,A friend had their 40th over the weekend and decided to theme it after Curb Your Enthusiasm fashion icon Susie Greene. Captured in my tiny kitchen before I left the house, I ending up evoking a mix of old lesbian and Hillary Clinton — both unintentional.Me vs Hillary ClintonIf you’re ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    2 days ago
  • How extreme was the Earth's temperature in 2023
    This is a re-post from Andrew Dessler at the Climate Brink blog In 2023, the Earth reached temperature levels unprecedented in modern times. Given that, it’s reasonable to ask: What’s going on? There’s been lots of discussions by scientists about whether this is just the normal progression of global warming or if something ...
    2 days ago
  • Backbone, revisited
    The schools are on holiday and the sun is shining in the seaside village and all day long I have been seeing bunches of bikes; Mums, Dads, teens and toddlers chattering, laughing, happy, having a bloody great time together. Cheers, AT, for the bits of lane you’ve added lately around the ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    3 days ago
  • Ministers are not above the law
    Today in our National-led authoritarian nightmare: Shane Jones thinks Ministers should be above the law: New Zealand First MP Shane Jones is accusing the Waitangi Tribunal of over-stepping its mandate by subpoenaing a minister for its urgent hearing on the Oranga Tamariki claim. The tribunal is looking into the ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    3 days ago
  • What’s the outfit you can hear going down the gurgler? Probably it’s David Parker’s Oceans Sec...
    Buzz from the Beehive Point  of Order first heard of the Oceans Secretariat in June 2021, when David Parker (remember him?) announced a multi-agency approach to protecting New Zealand’s marine ecosystems and fisheries. Parker (holding the Environment, and Oceans and Fisheries portfolios) broke the news at the annual Forest & ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    3 days ago
  • Will politicians let democracy die in the darkness?
    Bryce Edwards writes  – Politicians across the political spectrum are implicated in the New Zealand media’s failing health. Either through neglect or incompetent interventions, successive governments have failed to regulate, foster, and allow a healthy Fourth Estate that can adequately hold politicians and the powerful to account. ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    3 days ago
  • Matt Doocey doubles down on trans “healthcare”
    Citizen Science writes –  Last week saw two significant developments in the debate over the treatment of trans-identifying children and young people – the release in Britain of the final report of Dr Hilary Cass’s review into gender healthcare, and here in New Zealand, the news that the ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    3 days ago
  • A TikTok Prime Minister.
    One night while sleeping in my bed I had a beautiful dreamThat all the people of the world got together on the same wavelengthAnd began helping one anotherNow in this dream, universal love was the theme of the dayPeace and understanding and it happened this wayAfter such an eventful day ...
    Nick’s KƍreroBy Nick Rockel
    3 days ago
  • Texas Lessons
    This is a guest post by Oscar Simms who is a housing activist, volunteer for the Coalition for More Homes, and was the Labour Party candidate for Auckland Central at the last election. ...
    Greater AucklandBy Guest Post
    3 days ago
  • Bernard's pick 'n' mix of the news links at 6:06 am
    The top six news links I’ve seen elsewhere in the last 24 hours as of 6:06 am on Wednesday, April 17 are:Must read: Secrecy shrouds which projects might be fast-tracked RNZ Farah HancockScoop: Revealed: Luxon has seven staffers working on social media content - partly paid for by taxpayer Newshub ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    3 days ago
  • Fighting poverty on the holiday highway
    Turning what Labour called the “holiday highway” into a four-lane expressway from Auckland to Whangarei could bring at least an economic benefit of nearly two billion a year for Northland each year. And it could help bring an end to poverty in one of New Zealand’s most deprived regions. The ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    3 days ago
  • Bernard's six-stack of substacks at 6:26 pm
    Tonight’s six-stack includes: launching his substack with a bunch of his previous documentaries, including this 1992 interview with Dame Whina Cooper. and here crew give climate activists plenty to do, including this call to submit against the Fast Track Approvals bill. writes brilliantly here on his substack ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • At a glance – Is the science settled?
    On February 14, 2023 we announced our Rebuttal Update Project. This included an ask for feedback about the added "At a glance" section in the updated basic rebuttal versions. This weekly blog post series highlights this new section of one of the updated basic rebuttal versions and serves as a ...
    4 days ago
  • Apposite Quotations.
    How Long Is Long Enough? Gaza under Israeli bombardment, July 2014. This posting is exclusive to Bowalley Road. ...
    4 days ago
  • What’s a life worth now?
    You're in the mall when you hear it: some kind of popping sound in the distance, kids with fireworks, maybe. But then a moment of eerie stillness is followed by more of the fireworks sound and there’s also screaming and shrieking and now here come people running for their lives.Does ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    4 days ago
  • Howling at the Moon
    Karl du Fresne writes –  There’s a crisis in the news media and the media are blaming it on everyone except themselves. Culpability is being deflected elsewhere – mainly to the hapless Minister of Communications, Melissa Lee, and the big social media platforms that are accused of hoovering ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • Newshub is Dead.
    I don’t normally send out two newsletters in a day but I figured I’d say something about… the news. If two newsletters is a bit much then maybe just skip one, I don’t want to overload people. Alternatively if you’d be interested in sometimes receiving multiple, smaller updates from me, ...
    Nick’s KƍreroBy Nick Rockel
    4 days ago
  • Seymour is chuffed about cutting early-learning red tape – but we hear, too, that Jones has loose...
    Buzz from the Beehive David Seymour and Winston Peters today signalled that at least two ministers of the Crown might be in Wellington today. Seymour (as Associate Minister of Education) announced the removal of more red tape, this time to make it easier for new early learning services to be ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    4 days ago
  • Bryce Edwards: Will politicians let democracy die in the darkness?
    Politicians across the political spectrum are implicated in the New Zealand media’s failing health. Either through neglect or incompetent interventions, successive governments have failed to regulate, foster, and allow a healthy Fourth Estate that can adequately hold politicians and the powerful to account. Our political system is suffering from the ...
    Democracy ProjectBy bryce.edwards
    4 days ago
  • Was Hawkesby entirely wrong?
    David Farrar  writes –  The Broadcasting Standards Authority ruled: Comments by radio host Kate Hawkesby suggesting Māori and Pacific patients were being prioritised for surgery due to their ethnicity were misleading and discriminatory, the Broadcasting Standards Authority has found. It is a fact such patients are prioritised. ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • PRC shadow looms as the Solomons head for election
    PRC and its proxies in Solomons have been preparing for these elections for a long time. A lot of money, effort and intelligence have gone into ensuring an outcome that won’t compromise Beijing’s plans. Cleo Paskall writes – On April 17th the Solomon Islands, a country of ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • Climate Change: Criminal ecocide
    We are in the middle of a climate crisis. Last year was (again) the hottest year on record. NOAA has just announced another global coral bleaching event. Floods are threatening UK food security. So naturally, Shane Jones wants to make it easier to mine coal: Resources Minister Shane Jones ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    4 days ago
  • Is saving one minute of a politician's time worth nearly $1 billion?
    Is speeding up the trip to and from Wellington airport by 12 minutes worth spending up more than $10 billion? Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: The six news items that stood out to me in the last day to 8:26 am today are:The Lead: Transport Minister Simeon Brown announced ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago

  • PM’s South East Asia mission does the business
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has completed a successful trip to Singapore, Thailand and the Philippines, deepening relationships and capitalising on opportunities. Mr Luxon was accompanied by a business delegation and says the choice of countries represents the priority the New Zealand Government places on South East Asia, and our relationships in ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 hours ago
  • $41m to support clean energy in South East Asia
    New Zealand is demonstrating its commitment to reducing global greenhouse emissions, and supporting clean energy transition in South East Asia, through a contribution of NZ$41 million (US$25 million) in climate finance to the Asian Development Bank (ADB)-led Energy Transition Mechanism (ETM). Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Climate Change Minister Simon Watts announced ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    19 hours ago
  • Minister releases Fast-track stakeholder list
    The Government is today releasing a list of organisations who received letters about the Fast-track applications process, says RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop. “Recently Ministers and agencies have received a series of OIA requests for a list of organisations to whom I wrote with information on applying to have a ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    21 hours ago
  • Judicial appointments announced
    Attorney-General Judith Collins today announced the appointment of Wellington Barrister David Jonathan Boldt as a Judge of the High Court, and the Honourable Justice Matthew Palmer as a Judge of the Court of Appeal. Justice Boldt graduated with an LLB from Victoria University of Wellington in 1990, and also holds ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    22 hours ago
  • Education Minister heads to major teaching summit in Singapore
    Education Minister Erica Stanford will lead the New Zealand delegation at the 2024 International Summit on the Teaching Profession (ISTP) held in Singapore. The delegation includes representatives from the Post Primary Teachers’ Association (PPTA) Te Wehengarua and the New Zealand Educational Institute (NZEI) Te Riu Roa.  The summit is co-hosted ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    23 hours ago
  • Value of stopbank project proven during cyclone
    A stopbank upgrade project in Tairawhiti partly funded by the Government has increased flood resilience for around 7000ha of residential and horticultural land so far, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones says. Mr Jones today attended a dawn service in Gisborne to mark the end of the first stage of the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    23 hours ago
  • Anzac commemorations, TĂŒrkiye relationship focus of visit
    Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters will represent the Government at Anzac Day commemorations on the Gallipoli Peninsula next week and engage with senior representatives of the Turkish government in Istanbul.    “The Gallipoli campaign is a defining event in our history. It will be a privilege to share the occasion ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    23 hours ago
  • Minister to Europe for OECD meeting, Anzac Day
    Science, Innovation and Technology and Defence Minister Judith Collins will next week attend the OECD Science and Technology Ministerial conference in Paris and Anzac Day commemorations in Belgium. “Science, innovation and technology have a major role to play in rebuilding our economy and achieving better health, environmental and social outcomes ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Comprehensive Partnership the goal for NZ and the Philippines
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with the President of the Philippines, Ferdinand Marcos Jr.  The Prime Minister was accompanied by MP Paulo Garcia, the first Filipino to be elected to a legislature outside the Philippines. During today’s meeting, Prime Minister Luxon and President Marcos Jr discussed opportunities to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Government commits $20m to Westport flood protection
    The Government has announced that $20 million in funding will be made available to Westport to fund much needed flood protection around the town. This measure will significantly improve the resilience of the community, says Local Government Minister Simeon Brown. “The Westport community has already been allocated almost $3 million ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Taupƍ takes pole position
    The Government is proud to support the first ever Repco Supercars Championship event in Taupƍ as up to 70,000 motorsport fans attend the Taupƍ International Motorsport Park this weekend, says Economic Development Minister Melissa Lee. “Anticipation for the ITM Taupƍ Super400 is huge, with tickets and accommodation selling out weeks ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Cost of living support for low-income homeowners
    Local Government Minister Simeon Brown has announced an increase to the Rates Rebate Scheme, putting money back into the pockets of low-income homeowners.  “The coalition Government is committed to bringing down the cost of living for New Zealanders. That includes targeted support for those Kiwis who are doing things tough, such ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Government backing mussel spat project
    The Coalition Government is investing in a project to boost survival rates of New Zealand mussels and grow the industry, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones has announced. “This project seeks to increase the resilience of our mussels and significantly boost the sector’s productivity,” Mr Jones says. “The project - ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Government focused on getting people into work
    Benefit figures released today underscore the importance of the Government’s plan to rebuild the economy and have 50,000 fewer people on Jobseeker Support, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. “Benefit numbers are still significantly higher than when National was last in government, when there was about 70,000 fewer ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Clean energy key driver to reducing emissions
    The Government’s commitment to doubling New Zealand’s renewable energy capacity is backed by new data showing that clean energy has helped the country reach its lowest annual gross emissions since 1999, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. New Zealand’s latest Greenhouse Gas Inventory (1990-2022) published today, shows gross emissions fell ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Earthquake-prone buildings review brought forward
    The Government is bringing the earthquake-prone building review forward, with work to start immediately, and extending the deadline for remediations by four years, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “Our Government is focused on rebuilding the economy. A key part of our plan is to cut red tape that ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Thailand and NZ to agree to Strategic Partnership
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and his Thai counterpart, Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin, have today agreed that New Zealand and the Kingdom of Thailand will upgrade the bilateral relationship to a Strategic Partnership by 2026. “New Zealand and Thailand have a lot to offer each other. We have a strong mutual desire to build ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Government consults on extending coastal permits for ports
    RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Transport Minister Simeon Brown have today announced the Coalition Government’s intention to extend port coastal permits for a further 20 years, providing port operators with certainty to continue their operations. “The introduction of the Resource Management Act in 1991 required ports to obtain coastal ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Inflation coming down, but more work to do
    Today’s announcement that inflation is down to 4 per cent is encouraging news for Kiwis, but there is more work to be done - underlining the importance of the Government’s plan to get the economy back on track, acting Finance Minister Chris Bishop says. “Inflation is now at 4 per ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • School attendance restored as a priority in health advice
    Refreshed health guidance released today will help parents and schools make informed decisions about whether their child needs to be in school, addressing one of the key issues affecting school attendance, says Associate Education Minister David Seymour. In recent years, consistently across all school terms, short-term illness or medical reasons ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Unnecessary bureaucracy cut in oceans sector
    Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones is streamlining high-level oceans management while maintaining a focus on supporting the sector’s role in the export-led recovery of the economy. “I am working to realise the untapped potential of our fishing and aquaculture sector. To achieve that we need to be smarter with ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Patterson promoting NZ’s wool sector at International Congress
    Associate Agriculture Minister Mark Patterson is speaking at the International Wool Textile Organisation Congress in Adelaide, promoting New Zealand wool, and outlining the coalition Government’s support for the revitalisation the sector.    "New Zealand’s wool exports reached $400 million in the year to 30 June 2023, and the coalition Government ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Removing red tape to help early learners thrive
    The Government is making legislative changes to make it easier for new early learning services to be established, and for existing services to operate, Associate Education Minister David Seymour says. The changes involve repealing the network approval provisions that apply when someone wants to establish a new early learning service, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • RMA changes to cut coal mining consent red tape
    Changes to the Resource Management Act will align consenting for coal mining to other forms of mining to reduce barriers that are holding back economic development, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. “The inconsistent treatment of coal mining compared with other extractive activities is burdensome red tape that fails to acknowledge ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • McClay reaffirms strong NZ-China trade relationship
    Trade, Agriculture and Forestry Minister Todd McClay has concluded productive discussions with ministerial counterparts in Beijing today, in support of the New Zealand-China trade and economic relationship. “My meeting with Commerce Minister Wang Wentao reaffirmed the complementary nature of the bilateral trade relationship, with our Free Trade Agreement at its ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Prime Minister Luxon acknowledges legacy of Singapore Prime Minister Lee
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon today paid tribute to Singapore’s outgoing Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.   Meeting in Singapore today immediately before Prime Minister Lee announced he was stepping down, Prime Minister Luxon warmly acknowledged his counterpart’s almost twenty years as leader, and the enduring legacy he has left for Singapore and South East ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • PMs Luxon and Lee deepen Singapore-NZ ties
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with Singapore Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong. While in Singapore as part of his visit to South East Asia this week, Prime Minister Luxon also met with Singapore President Tharman Shanmugaratnam and will meet with Deputy Prime Minister Lawrence Wong.  During today’s meeting, Prime Minister Luxon ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Antarctica New Zealand Board appointments
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters has made further appointments to the Board of Antarctica New Zealand as part of a continued effort to ensure the Scott Base Redevelopment project is delivered in a cost-effective and efficient manner.  The Minister has appointed Neville Harris as a new member of the Board. Mr ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Finance Minister travels to Washington DC
    Finance Minister Nicola Willis will travel to the United States on Tuesday to attend a meeting of the Five Finance Ministers group, with counterparts from Australia, the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom.  “I am looking forward to meeting with our Five Finance partners on how we can work ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Pet bonds a win/win for renters and landlords
    The coalition Government has today announced purrfect and pawsitive changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to give tenants with pets greater choice when looking for a rental property, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “Pets are important members of many Kiwi families. It’s estimated that around 64 per cent of New ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Long Tunnel for SH1 Wellington being considered
    State Highway 1 (SH1) through Wellington City is heavily congested at peak times and while planning continues on the duplicate Mt Victoria Tunnel and Basin Reserve project, the Government has also asked NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) to consider and provide advice on a Long Tunnel option, Transport Minister Simeon Brown ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • New Zealand condemns Iranian strikes
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Foreign Minister Winston Peters have condemned Iran’s shocking and illegal strikes against Israel.    “These attacks are a major challenge to peace and stability in a region already under enormous pressure," Mr Luxon says.    "We are deeply concerned that miscalculation on any side could ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Huge interest in Government’s infrastructure plans
    Hundreds of people in little over a week have turned out in Northland to hear Regional Development Minister Shane Jones speak about plans for boosting the regional economy through infrastructure. About 200 people from the infrastructure and associated sectors attended an event headlined by Mr Jones in Whangarei today. Last ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Health Minister thanks outgoing Health New Zealand Chair
    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti has today thanked outgoing Health New Zealand – Te Whatu Ora Chair Dame Karen Poutasi for her service on the Board.   “Dame Karen tendered her resignation as Chair and as a member of the Board today,” says Dr Reti.  “I have asked her to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Roads of National Significance planning underway
    The NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) has signalled their proposed delivery approach for the Government’s 15 Roads of National Significance (RoNS), with the release of the State Highway Investment Proposal (SHIP) today, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.  “Boosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of the Government’s plan to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Navigating an unstable global environment
    New Zealand is renewing its connections with a world facing urgent challenges by pursuing an active, energetic foreign policy, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.   “Our country faces the most unstable global environment in decades,” Mr Peters says at the conclusion of two weeks of engagements in Egypt, Europe and the United States.    “We cannot afford to sit back in splendid ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • NZ welcomes Australian Governor-General
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has announced the Australian Governor-General, His Excellency General The Honourable David Hurley and his wife Her Excellency Mrs Linda Hurley, will make a State visit to New Zealand from Tuesday 16 April to Thursday 18 April. The visit reciprocates the State visit of former Governor-General Dame Patsy Reddy ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Pseudoephedrine back on shelves for Winter
    Associate Health Minister David Seymour has announced that Medsafe has approved 11 cold and flu medicines containing pseudoephedrine. Pharmaceutical suppliers have indicated they may be able to supply the first products in June. “This is much earlier than the original expectation of medicines being available by 2025. The Government recognised ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • NZ and the US: an ever closer partnership
    New Zealand and the United States have recommitted to their strategic partnership in Washington DC today, pledging to work ever more closely together in support of shared values and interests, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.    “The strategic environment that New Zealand and the United States face is considerably more ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
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  • Joint US and NZ declaration
    April 11, 2024 Joint Declaration by United States Secretary of State the Honorable Antony J. Blinken and New Zealand Minister of Foreign Affairs the Right Honourable Winston Peters We met today in Washington, D.C. to recommit to the historic partnership between our two countries and the principles that underpin it—rule ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago

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