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ImperatorFish: Poor, sick, and unemployed looking forward to MRP share offer

Written By: - Date published: 11:42 am, March 6th, 2013 - 19 comments
Categories: privatisation, Satire - Tags: ,

Scott at Imperator Fish has kindly given us permission to syndicate posts from his blog – the original of this post is here.

As pre-registration opens for the Mighty River Power offer, people all around the country are gearing up to take shares in the company.

The official share offer website has been overloaded, as thousands of people bombard the site looking for information on the offer.

Shopping malls and community centres in some parts of South Auckland are reportedly almost empty, as people stay home in an effort to pre-register online.

In Wainuiomata the local rugby league club has been converted to an internet café, so that impoverished members of the community can pre-register their interest.

Early indications are that over 300% of the country’s population will take up the share offer.

Solo mother of two Rita Bonos said she was thrilled to be getting the chance to buy shares in a highly profitable company.

Ms Bonos said it would be tough to find the money on her minimum-wage cleaning job, especially as her car needed repairs and the children needed new shoes.

“But I’d be mad not to take up the offer”, she said. “So I’ve decided to try my luck at prostitution. How else am I going to earn the money?

“The kids will just have to fend for themselves at night, but I reckon they’ll be fine. The oldest is almost five now.”

Angus Snee said he would not pass up the opportunity to invest in one of New Zealand’s strongest companies.

Mr Snee was made redundant in 2009 after a thirty year career as a timber worker. In poor health and on his own, he is now on a sickness benefit.

But Snee insists that his desperate financial circumstances will not prevent him from taking a share of the loot.

“I spent thirty years of my life paying taxes and contributing to the economy of this nation,” he said. “Then the owners of the mill where I worked decided I was surplus to requirements. They threw me on the scrapheap, without even a ‘thank you very much for your years of effort’.

“My body is buggered from years of work, and I was forced to sell the house I’d saved hard to buy all those years ago, just so I could pay the medical bills that our ACC system was supposed to cover.

“Thank God for those Mighty River Power shares. They’ll be my salvation.”

Snee said he had been putting money aside for the shares.

“I’ve been saving up since late last year, just by being more careful with my spending. I no longer buy the fancy catfood when I go to the supermarket, but it never did agree with my digestion anyway.”

He picked up a jar from the back of his bookcase and rattled it proudly. “I’ve already put aside almost forty dollars.”

Even more excited at acquiring a share parcel is unemployed woman Sheila Shelby.

“I don’t have enough to pay the rent and to feed myself properly”, said Ms Shelby, “but I’d be nuts not to take part in this share issue.

“The neighbour’s got a flash new TV, and I reckon I’d get a couple of hundred for it. I’ve never stolen anything before, but what choice do I have?

“If this government is going to sell us down the Mighty River, then I may as well be along for the ride.”

19 comments on “ImperatorFish: Poor, sick, and unemployed looking forward to MRP share offer”

  1. ropata 1

    It’s absolutely marvellous that average mum and dad kiwi investors like Ron Brierly, Bob Jones, and Mark Hotchins will be at the front of the queue, participating in a fair and democratically apportioned share offer.
    (comment recycled from IF)

    • kiwi_prometheus 1.1

      Actually when Contact Energy was sold in 1999, it created 225 000 share holders mostly of the “mum and dad” sorts.

      Within 2 years 100 000 of them has bailed.

      “Ensuring strong demand for Mighty River Power shares in Australia is key to the Government’s partial privatisation plan…

      …For whatever reason Kiwis don’t seem to make natural share investors. Putting money into a company for the medium to long term just doesn’t seem to appeal. Lack of patience? Lack of understanding? Whatever the reason, there doesn’t seem to be that stickability when it comes to share investment.”

      http://www.interest.co.nz/opinion/63413/opinion-ensuring-strong-demand-mighty-river-power-shares-australia-key-government%E2%80%99s-pa

      • geoff 1.1.1

        …For whatever reason Kiwis don’t seem to make natural share investors.

        Right, so they should never have sold Contact.

        • kiwi_prometheus 1.1.1.1

          Maybe. I’m not a fan of public asset sales.

          But it is happening and this article makes an interesting read on the event and as it points out there will be plenty of mum and dad investors lining up.

  2. AsleepWhileWalking 2

    I particularly enjoying this post, possibly because I actually registered my interest in the fervent hope that I would win ozlotto and be able to buy some shares, thereby positioning myself for life.

    In real life I’m stuck on an Invalids benefit and in treatment most days of the week.

    [NZ lotteries are too expensive and the prizes suck – and what’s with that winning wheel crap? Like I’d wanna advertise I was in the money to a bunch of long lost relies and “friends” who don’t even get along with me on FB].

    • Descendant Of Sssmith 2.1

      No doubt as the PM thinks that this is so really really important beneficiaries will be able to get a special one off advance to buy their share of the shares.

      This will ensure the most disadvantaged can have access
      Won’t cost the government any more money as advances have to be paid back – beneficiaries would be using their own money
      Maximise the number of NZer’s that can buy shares
      Given the expectations of good returns reduce beneficiary dependancy via fewer food grants paid out
      To ensure they keep the shares they should be exempted from consideration in all asset tests etc like the government currently does with Kiwisaver funds – it’s your own special slice of NZ.

      For low income earners they could be allowed to capitalise their WFF or other entitlements such as help with accommodation.

      Seems to me a great opportunity to help ensure mum and dads actually get the shares.

    • xtasy 2.2

      Out of mischief, I think that all beneficiaries in this country should simply have their interests registered, and in the final minute withdraw or cancel it, turning the whole exercise into a gigantic shambles!

      Now what about that strategy???

      Yes more than the 340 thousand beneficiaries could do so, it could be half the population, who opposed all this, thus upset the whole registration and sales process, creating immense costs and inconveniencing the government in their plans.

  3. Karl Sinclair 3

    Check this out 2.2 Million + views and counting:
    (substitute New Zealanders and use the video as a metaphor for the current sale of Assets scam)

    Why Do Americans Tolerate Extreme Wealth Inequality?

    From Big Think: http://bigthink.com/praxis/why-do-americans-tolerate-extreme-wealth-inequality

    “New data shows Americans haven’t a clue how stunningly massive the wealth gap in their country really is. An excellent video blowing up on YouTube depicts this disparity and explains how badly Americans tend to underestimate it. No matter how many statistics you’ve read on the subject, the video deserves six minutes of your time”

    or here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPKKQnijnsM&feature=player_embedded#!

    Oh gee, I wonder how many NZ mums and dads are rushing to the asset sale website….

    Remember pessimism and skepticism will not be tolerated, you must be in OPTIMISTIC THINK…. all is good with NZ, nothing is bad, everyone can be who they want to be………………

    • freedom 3.1

      snap, was just about to post it :)
      something every banker/trader or money lender at the temple should be made to watch before they start work,
      or sit to eat with their family

      • Arfamo 3.1.1

        That’s a great way to show what’s happened in the US, but the average voter here will go so what? That’s the US. I’d love to see a similar set of graphs for NZ.

        • geoff 3.1.1.1

          From MSD:

          In 2011 NZ gini coefficient was 0.34
          the USA was 0.38

          not wildly different so the overall distribution will probably be similar.

          • geoff 3.1.1.1.1

            I should say that was for income.
            For wealth, the NZ figures are even more unequal than for income:

            (from the same source)

            6 Wealth is distributed more unequally than income.

            Wealth Gini scores are typically two to three times those for income.
            In New Zealand, those in the top income decile receive 25% of gross income; those in the top wealth decile hold 50% of the total wealth.
            New Zealand’s top decile wealth share is similar to those found in many other OECD countries: Australia and the UK (45%), Germany (52%), Canada (53%) and Sweden (58%). For the US it is around 70%.

          • Arfamo 3.1.1.1.2

            Probably, but the graphs would make an impact only if they’re charting NZ’s wealth distribution over time. They’d be a handy tool for someone in an election year, but a possible handicap for any party that can be accused of having green lighted the wealth transfer unless they can say they’ve had an epiphany since then and are now on a totally different track.

            • Murray Olsen 3.1.1.1.2.1

              I’m just guessing, but I think that party might be Labour. I can’t see any sign of caucus being on a different track. If the members get the say they’re supposed to, the party as a whole might be. How they would get that message across with an ABC frontbench, I just don’t know.

      • Karl Sinclair 3.1.2

        Hey Freedom, LOL…

        The great thing about the internet is you can start to compare and contrast different data that is objective and based on fact. Unfortunately it does not get any better…… Funny how this does not really make the mainstream media in NZ. Check this out:

        1.
        http://www.ted.com/talks/richard_wilkinson.html
        Here is some sound data on economic inequality, and it shows it gets worse when rich and poor are too far apart: real effects on health, lifespan, even such basic values as trust.

        2.
        Then combine it with: The Whitehall Study
        http://www.ucl.ac.uk/whitehallII/pdf/Whitehallbooklet_1_.pdf

        “The Whitehall studies have dispelled two myths. The first
        is that people in high status jobs have higher risks of
        heart disease. The second is that the gradient of health in
        industrialised societies is simply a matter of poor health
        for the disadvantaged and good health for everyone else. ”

        3. Just to top it off with the latest data:
        Child poverty in the US has reached record levels, with almost 17 million children now affected. A growing number are also going hungry on a daily basis.

        http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-21636723

        Sigh……. where the hell is the prozac and what are those ABs up to…………………

  4. Anne 4

    I think we need to separate the fourth Labour govt. from the Labour Party. It was an aberration. At the time few people understood what was going on. The agenda was rolled out over 3 to 4 years and by the time the penny dropped it was too late. Helen Clark was one of the few who did understand, and I was witness to the extraordinary effort of the rogernome clique to vilify her for that reason. She was criticised in later years for staying quiet but she had no choice. The rogernomes were the dominant force and would have hounded her out of parliament had she poked as much as her nose above the parapet.

    David Cunliffe is in a similar position today but for slightly different reasons although there are a few parallels. There will come a time in the near future (I hope) when the ABC club will no longer be a force to contend with and Labour once again reasserts its basic principles, and proves it can be a strong, stable partner in a left of centre coalition government. Perhaps for the first time the wrongs of the 80s and 90s can at last be fully righted.

    Oh well, hope springs eternal.

    • Treetop 4.1

      Good analysis. It took Clark 18 years to be PM.

      Is there something in the NZ psyche which prefers to hang onto a government for nine years, if so what is it?

      I reiterate, “Cunliffe attacks the problem better than Shearer does.”

      • Treetop 4.1.1

        I forgot to add that in 1984 Lange was the clear winner as Labour leader and in 1999 so was Clark. Labour voters really liked them and both Lange and Clark were capable caucus leaders.

        Do the Labour voters really like Shearer?

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    GreensBy Jan Logie MP
    2 days ago
  • Global milk prices now lowest in 6 years
    The latest fall in the global dairy price has brought it to the lowest level in six years and shows there must be meaningful action in tomorrow’s Budget to diversify the economy, says Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson. “Dairy prices… ...
    2 days ago
  • Big risks as CYF checks stopped
    Revelations that Child, Youth and Family is no longer assisting home-based early childhood educators by vetting potential employees should set alarm bells ringing, Labour Children’s spokesperson Jacinda Ardern says. “Doing away with an extra mechanism for checking potential new employees… ...
    3 days ago
  • Housing crisis about real people not numbers
    The Government’s continued failure to tackle the housing crisis is seeing thousands of vulnerable Kiwis being kept off social housing waiting lists, while others, who are on the list, are being forced to live in cars and garages, says Labour’s… ...
    3 days ago
  • Housing crisis about real people not numbers
    The Government’s continued failure to tackle the housing crisis is seeing thousands of vulnerable Kiwis being kept off social housing waiting lists, while others, who are on the list, are being forced to live in cars and garages, says Labour’s… ...
    3 days ago
  • State of origin
    Kiwis are increasingly concerned about the food they give their families. New Zealand consumers have the right to know where their food has come from, particularly when it involves animals, and should be able to expect our Government to label… ...
    GreensBy Steffan Browning MP
    3 days ago
  • Relationships Aotearoa
    It is disturbing that Relationships Aotearoa, a voluntary organisation set up in 1949 to help couples struggling with their relationships following the upheavals of World War II, may be forced to close, says Acting Spokesperson for the Voluntary and Community… ...
    3 days ago
  • An economy that is just working for some is an economy that is not working
    The National Party presents itself as a great manager of the economy, but if the economy is only working for some we really need to question that assertion. Alongside the perpetually elusive surplus, the levels of risk in our economy are… ...
    GreensBy Jan Logie MP
    3 days ago
  • An economy that is just working for some is an economy that is not working
    The National Party presents itself as a great manager of the economy, but if the economy is only working for some we really need to question that assertion. Alongside the perpetually elusive surplus, the levels of risk in our economy are… ...
    GreensBy Jan Logie MP
    3 days ago
  • House prices to a crack $1 million in 17 months
    The average Auckland home is on track to cost $1 million in 17 months’ time if nothing substantial is done to rein in soaring price rises, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “Auckland’s house prices have skyrocketed 63 per cent… ...
    4 days ago
  • Vital support services can’t be left in lurch
    The National Government has big questions to answer about how a provider of services to thousands of vulnerable New Zealanders is set to fold, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says. Relationships Aotearoa which provides support and counselling to families, individuals… ...
    4 days ago
  • Treasury and IRD on a capital gains tax
    Both the Treasury and IRD have been advising the National Government on the benefits of a capital gains tax. Documents released to the Green Party under an Official Information Act request show that John Key has been selective with the… ...
    GreensBy Russel Norman MP
    4 days ago
  • Charity legislation needs review
    It is unacceptable that the big corporate based charities claim  millions in annual income tax exemptions, while small community based and operated non-profit organisations  struggle to gain official charity status, Labour’s acting spokesperson for the Voluntary and Community Sector Louisa… ...
    4 days ago
  • John’s panic-Key response to housing crisis
    John Key needs to tell New Zealanders what caused his sudden change of heart that led to the Government’s scrambled and last-minute housing measures, Opposition Leader Andrew Little says. “The Prime Minister’s sudden rush of blood to his head followed… ...
    4 days ago
  • Keep our Assets Christchurch Campaign: An update
    I recently presented my submission to keep Christchurch Council assets at the Christchurch City Council’s public hearings on its 10 year plan on 13 May. The hearings are live-streamed and recorded so you can watch them on www.ccc.govt.nz. The Council’s… ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage MP
    4 days ago
  • John Key finally admits there’s a housing crisis
    John Key’s weak measures to rein in the astronomical profits property speculators are making are an admission – finally – that there is a housing crisis, Labour Leader Andrew Little says. “But yet again National is tinkering with the housing… ...
    5 days ago
  • Government stifles voices in CYFs review
    The Government’s exclusion of the Māori Women’s Welfare League in a panel on the future of CYFs is a cynical ploy to stifle views, says Labour’s Māori Development Spokesperson Nanaia Mahuta. “It's unbelievable that a significant review on the future… ...
    1 week ago
  • Speech to the Otago Chamber of Commerce
    Thank you very much for the opportunity to be here today. It’s a pleasure as always to be back in the town that raised me. Growing up in St Kilda meant that there was one thing that was a big… ...
    1 week ago
  • Key can’t just be Prime Minister for Parnell
    John Key must show New Zealanders in next week’s Budget that he is more than the Prime Minister for Parnell, and is also the Prime Minister for Pine Hill, Putararu and Palmerston North, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says. In… ...
    1 week ago
  • Stop the conversions
    This week, some Waikato locals took me and intrepid photographer Amanda Rogers on a tour of some  lakes and waterways in their region, and up to the massive dairy conversions in the upper catchment of the Waikato River. It… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    1 week ago
  • More regional jobs go in Corrections reshape
    News that 194 Corrections staff are to lose their jobs will have ramifications not only for them and their families but for the wider community, Labour’s Corrections spokesperson Kelvin Davis says. Prison units at Waikeria, Tongariro and Rimutaka face closure… ...
    1 week ago
  • Government’s climate meetings off to a bumpy start
    On Wednesday, I attended a hui and an evening meeting that the Government had organised in Nelson as part of its climate change consultation tour, to support the Nelson community telling the Government to take meaningful action on climate change.… ...
    GreensBy Steffan Browning MP
    1 week ago
  • Taxpayers the only ones left feeling blue
    Ministry of Social Development bosses could have saved themselves thousands of dollars in consultants’ fees by providing staff with rose-tinted spectacles, Labour’s State Services spokesperson Kris Faafoi says. A report out today reveals the Ministry is spending over half a… ...
    1 week ago
  • Why are the regions still facing restrictions?
    Labour's Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford is questioning why the regions should continue to be saddled with LVR lending restrictions announced by the Reserve Bank today. “Labour has been calling for the regions to be exempted from LVRs for the best… ...
    1 week ago
  • The high costs of weak environmental regulation
    Te Waihora/Lake Ellesmere is described on the Department of Conservation website as “Canterbury’s largest and New Zealand’s fifth largest [lake], and an internationally important wildlife area.” But the lake is also polluted by nutrients leaching from farms in the catchment.… ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage MP
    1 week ago
  • Submissions to Wellington City Council on their Gambling Venues Policy
    Every three years Councils across the country are required to check that their gambling venue policies are still fit for purpose and they can choose to consult on their policy if they are thinking of making changes. Councils don’t have… ...
    GreensBy Denise Roche MP
    1 week ago
  • Reserve Bank action shows Govt out of touch and out of ideas
    The Reserve Bank’s unprecedented measures today show it understands the serious risks of the overheating housing market – in complete contrast to John Key’s refusal to acknowledge the crisis, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says. “The Bank is right to… ...
    1 week ago
  • Send us your snaps: 25 Years of the Green Party
    This year we've hit a milestone. We're turning 25.To help celebrate a quarter of a century, please send us your photos from the last 25 years of the Green Party Aotearoa New Zealand! Note: Photos must be jpg, gif or… ...
    1 week ago
  • 25 Years of the Green Party
    This year the Green Party sends 25. To help us celebrate a quarter of a century please send us you photos of 25 years of the Green Party!Photos must be jpg,gif or png and smaller than 2MB. If you are… ...
    1 week ago
  • Bay growth plan too little too late
    Today’s Bay of Plenty growth study from MBIE is another example of Government spin - lots of talk but little action, says Labour’s Regional Development spokesperson David Cunliffe.  “This is a region that desperately needs to develop the downstream processing… ...
    1 week ago
  • Government bows to ACC pressure
     The Government has finally buckled to pressure from Labour and the New Zealand public in making a half billion dollar cut to ACC levies, but the full benefits are two years away,” says Opposition Leader Andrew Little.  “$500 million over… ...
    2 weeks ago
  • False figures cloud Auckland transport facts
    The Prime Minister should apologise and issue a correction after both he and Transport Minister Simon Bridges have been caught out misrepresenting facts on Auckland’s transport spending, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. "Both John Key and Simon Bridges have… ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Govt books confirm National can’t post surplus
    The last publication of the Government’s books before the budget shows National will break its promise of seven years and two election campaigns and fail to get the books in order, says Labour’s Finance Spokesperson Grant Robertson. “The Government is… ...
    2 weeks ago
  • US state joins NZ with GE food labelling
    New Zealand has a similar law making the labelling of many GE foods compulsory, but the Government seems to let it slide.  Because the government has not monitored or enforced our GE food labelling laws since 2003, it seems the… ...
    GreensBy Steffan Browning MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Labour Pays Tribute to Erima Henare
    “E ua e te ua tata rahi ana, Ko te hua i te kamo taheke i runga raa. No reira e te rangatira Erima takoto mai I roto I te ringa o Ihowa o nga Mano e moe e.” ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Labour Pays Tribute to Erima Henare
    “E ua e te ua tata rahi ana, Ko te hua i te kamo taheke i runga raa. No reira e te rangatira Erima takoto mai I roto I te ringa o Ihowa o nga Mano e moe e.” ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Labour Pays Tribute to Erima Henare
    “E ua e te ua tata rahi ana, Ko te hua i te kamo taheke i runga raa. No reira e te rangatira Erima takoto mai I roto I te ringa o Ihowa o nga Mano e moe e.” ...
    2 weeks ago

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