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JK wants to inject life into zombie

Written By: - Date published: 6:12 pm, February 26th, 2013 - 30 comments
Categories: act, john banks, john key - Tags:

John Key is keen that the ACT party is “regenerating”. Apparently a weekend bash at super-rich Alan Gibb’s Randian paradise means they can now put baby-name stealing, Brash takeovers, internecine coups, Banksian donations and memory failures behind them.

That’s if a party that registered 0%, 0.2%, 0.4% and 0.5% in the latest round of polls can be called “regenerating”: I’ve seen (other) zombies more full of life…  I guess they were up in 2 of those polls (and flat in the other 2), so the (short-term) trend is their friend… but they’re going to be struggling to justify 1 Epsom zombie MP by party vote, let alone bring any with him.

But still, Key realises he needs friends – and friends on the right to justify Charter Schools-esque policies:

ACT represented “room to the right” for the party to move, and teaming up could satisfy more right-wing voters, Key told TV3’s Firstline this morning.

So looks like he’s not learnt from his tea-party, and he’ll be sucking face with a zombie once again… let’s hope it’ll drain some more life from his prospects…

30 comments on “JK wants to inject life into zombie”

  1. Weta 1

    Don’t underestimate them.
    Money talks.
    Zombies walk.
    Especially in the land of the Auks.

  2. Rogue Trooper 2

    ACT’s Up; Night of The Living Dead

  3. “John Key is keen that the ACT party is “regenerating””

    A case of better the socially retarded you know.
    Crooks I can turn a blind eye to, but please don’t make me have to deal with the Christian, loony fringe conservatives.

  4. Jenny 4

    It’s Alive…..

    It’s Aliiiiive!

    John Key the political equivalent of Dr Frankenstein

  5. Jenny 5

    Can’t wait to see a repeat of the Mad Hatter’s tea party in Epsom. Now that would be a sight.

    Can someone make a mock up of a giant paper mache’ microphone to put between them? Maybe we could book the table next to them for people in costumes matching the seriousness of the occasion. I’ll play Alice if Lynn plays the mad Hatter.

  6. vto 6

    Must remember to piss and shit more frequently in them Epsom hedges so as to create a more appropriate fragrance..

  7. Phil 7

    Yep, hilarious.
    Lets all sit back and snigger while we wait for Banks to be re elected.
    Key is gearing up to put a huge amount of support behind ACT’s campaign in Epsom. Still not woken up to the continued value of Banks to the Nats, even when he is spelling it out for you?
    Think we will have another Goldsmith bungle at the top of Parnell at the next election? Please, think again.

  8. georgecom 8

    Banks on the TV news over the weekend saying 5% would be good for ACT as it would give him 6 MPs.

    John, 0.5% would be good for ACT.

    Roger Douglas some time back predicting 15%.
    Brash before the last election predicting 5%
    Now Banks at 5%.

    Meanwhile the election results go the opposite way.

  9. Arfamo 9

    At the rate they’ve been polling over successive elections I don’t think even Banksy is seriously going to vote for ACT.

  10. vto 10

    Has John Banks forgotten about that great hulking looming giant Kim Dotcom? I imagine a great run is being lined up to coincide with Banks requirement for positive media attention. And Banks just aint gonna get it. And I imagine those lovely jubbly Epsom folk will simply wince too much at the thought of him. Some of them have scruples you know…

    • Arfamo 10.1

      “Some of them have scruples you know…”

      Yes but they are more likely to seek counselling so they can get rid of them…

  11. MrSmith 11

    What pisses me off is RadioNZ giving Rodney Hide a soap box on Brian Grumps show.

    Or should that read Brian Grump giving his Mate Rodders a Hand back up.

    After listening to the pair of them a while ago it appeared they were both singing from the same sheet.

  12. Rodel 12

    What gets me is that for most people in New Zealand Hide, Banks and Brash are so unpopular.
    Nobody (well what is it .1%) really wants to have them in Parliament.

    Even Epsom people and Tory relatives of mine cringe and try to change the subject when I point out that Banks is one of them.They chuckle a bit post Hide, look a bit shame faced at Brash but positively cringe over Banks.
    John Key likes Banks.( Well he would, wouldn’t he) yet Key scores high on the popularity stakes if we are to believe the corporate polls..
    What’s wrong ere?
    And what’s with Jim Hopkins? Is he one of them or did he temporarily rent out his soul?

    • henry olongo 12.1

      One of them.

      • Arfamo 12.1.1

        Does it matter? I dunno about others but whenever I read Jim Hopkins I get to the end and can’t figure out what it was about and am too exhausted to read it again.

        • Pascal's bookie 12.1.1.1

          I get about 3 paragraphs in, then scan ahead to see if there might be anything resembling a point; yet another example of the triumph of optimism over experience.

          Let’s not sugercoat it, the man’s a fucking idiot. Why ACT would want him, and why he likes ACT, is self-explanatory.

  13. bad12 13

    Ah yes Slippery is to face a little conundrum in 2014, the people want ACT gone from the Parliament, to regain the Treasury Benches Slippery must weigh up the worth of Banks versus the value of the vote that could be lost by giving Banks and therefore ACT oxygen in Epsom,

    The gambler will opt for the easier bet on Banks, expect another chimps tea party pre November 2014…

    • Jenny 13.1

      …expect another chimps tea party pre November 2014

      bad12

      I can’t wait.

      Who was it, who said somewhere, something about history repeating?

      That what first comes round as tragedy repeats as farce.

      I imagine that this farce will become a three ringed circus with all the trimmings.

      • Jenny 13.1.1

        I think that this will be a sell out event in more than one sense of the word.

        Make sure to grab yourself a front row seat. Before they are all taken.

        Especially if you are in the media, you will be able to dine out on this one, for some time.

      • jaymam 13.1.2

        I think that next election there will be lots of Goldsmith hoardings in Epsom and that Goldsmith will appear to be trying to be elected.
        I hope that lots of people will hold signs up at intersections alongside the ACT students. Are there any ACT students now that ACT on campus is pissed off at Banks?

  14. emergency mike 14

    “ACT represented “room to the right” for the party to move, and teaming up could satisfy more right-wing voters, Key told TV3′s Firstline this morning

    He said though there was room to the right for the party to move, the party was most successful when it was centrist.”

    Flexible ol’ National. They can be centrist, or move to the right, or even appeal to the outright right-wing. Wherever on the right side of the political spectrum you think they are… yeah… that’s where they are.

    So vote for National if you think we stand for something, coz we could pretend to do that if you’re into that. Or maybe you’d rather we stood for nothing, we would be open to that viewpoint also. Something for everyone.

    Oh and don’t worry about the ethics of teaming up with NZ’s currently percived most corrupt politician, because John Key didn’t read that report. Complete confidence.

    So vote National! Do we really need to give you a reason? So annoying…

  15. tc 15

    It will all probably be going swimmingly and then along comes some very controversial material all nicely timed, beautifully recorded and laid down like a fairy tales breadcrumb trail.

    It’ll possibly smear so much ka ka all over blinky, slippery and the whole cabal of corrupt hollowmen that it may just cost them any future credibility even to the bluest of tinted glasses.

    The MSM have shown they don’t to do their jobs,so it’ll possibly get done for them.It may even provoke a few more tales from the woodwork.

  16. Richard29 16

    This is great news. I think it is safe to say that there are more votes to be won by refusing to work with Act than by working with them so this position only hurts National.

    Plus, the refusal to just let the Act party die acts to split the minor party protest votes on the right fringe helping ensure that Colin Craig and other right wing nutters fail to make 5%.

    Now we just need Key to act equivocally when asked if he would go into coalition with Winston and Shearer to say he won’t work with him and we’d see a big shift of centrist voters from Blue to Red/Green.

  17. Binders full of viper- women 17

    read the headline and assumed it was about the Blues… dats how Waitakere man’s brain works :)

  18. Rodney Hide confirmed today (Wednesday 27 February 2013) when I asked him on Radio Live, that ACT still DO believe in ‘ONE LAW FOR ALL’.

    When I asked him if ACT supported the private prosecutions against John Banks and Don Brash, he supported Graham McCready’s right to take private prosecutions, and didn’t think anyone in ACT would oppose that.

    (Rodney obviously hasn’t been talking to dear dodgy John Banks on THAT point! ).

    FASCINATING stuff!

    Penny Bright
    ‘Anti-corruption campaigner’.

    http://www.dodgyjohnhasgone.com

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