web analytics
The Standard
Advertising

Queen of Thorns makes a move for Labour leadership

Written By: - Date published: 12:00 pm, November 18th, 2012 - 15 comments
Categories: labour, making shit up, Satire - Tags:

It’s like this, people.

Last night Patrick Gower emailed me about how the Labour Party Conference was going.  See, I’d criticised TV3’s coverage on Twitter, where an embarrassing clip of Paddy badgering David Cunliffe to predict the future was spun into “DAVID CUNLIFFE MAKING A MOVE FOR LABOUR LEADERSHIP.”

Then I, in a fit of girlish flirtation, emailed back, “Sorry, Paddy.  I can’t confirm I won’t run against Shearer in February either!”

And thus my secret is out.  By refusing to predict the state of the party in three months’ time, by refusing to make assumptions about whether David Shearer can pull the cat out of the bag or will continue to muddle along with his guitar getting nowhere in the polls … well, I’ve clearly thrown my hat in the ring.

You should also be aware that I can’t rule out moving to Thailand at some point in the future, maybe after the February Labour leadership vote.  That’s going to be Paddy’s headline tomorrow night:  “NZ BLOGGER TO ABANDON COUNTRY IF SHEARER REMAINS LEADER”.

And I also couldn’t rule out having steak for dinner tonight.  On Monday, Paddy’s got Campbell Live locked down for exclusive coverage of RADICAL FEMINIST BLOGGER PLANS SUNDAY FEAST TO CELEBRATE CUNLIFFE’S IMPENDING LEADERSHIP CHALLENGE.

Seriously, people.  There can be news stories in what people are happy or unhappy to confirm or deny.  There are interesting implications for the future leadership of Labour in the changes that have been voted at conference.

But whining “David, David, show your loyalty David, rule out running against Shearer David, come on David, why won’t you prove your loyalty David” and then reporting that as ground-breaking leadership challenge rumblings is just sad.

Mind you, we’re talking about the journo who added up the number of job ads on TradeMe and Seek and then declared that there wasn’t an unemployment crisis.

Meanwhile, John Armstrong is clearly so upset at the prospect of more democracy in the Labour Party he’s been moved to tweet 4 times today already.  Normally such flurries of activity are reserved for the super-cool fun times he’s having on overseas junkets, which you’ll recall he’d like us to note are really hard work, guys.  All I can think?  Is some senior journos are really worried that more democracy in the Labour Party means less juicy gossip for their pet MPs to leak to them.

Speaking of pet MPs, can someone find Trevor Mallard and duct-tape his mouth shut?

15 comments on “Queen of Thorns makes a move for Labour leadership”

  1. ianmac 1

    Brilliant! :)

  2. just saying 2

    Good to see the laundry is done QoT.

    Coincidently, I haven’t ruled out a bid for the leadership either.
    Has anyone in the Labour caucus ruled it out or in? It would be nice to know in advance who my competition might be.

    And let me know if or when you rule any of your many options in or out QoT. I notice you haven’t ruled out running for Secretary-General of the UN. Could this be the real story behind the story?

    • QoT 2.1

      I haven’t ruled out running for Secretary-General either! Clearly this shows there are vicious factional infights underway amongst Standard commenters. But which of us did Helen Clark refuse to rule out supporting on her recent visit? Maybe that’s the real story?

  3. Tim 3

    Well we’ve always known most of the current MSM have an ideological bent, based on positions of comfort and an unquestioning, apathetic public – many who’ve never experienced a 4th Estate. Besides which – IF Paddy did do as you say as regards job availability and the lack of an employment crisis – he’s quite obviously NOT the sharpest knife in the drawer. (For a start! Multiple employment agencies advertise the same jobs, AND they advertise ‘non-existent’ jobs in order to get people on their books – especially in IT and other professions).
    Still…….everythings just tickity boo ain’t it? The Royals come along and these days they engage with an adoring public, and even some deightful couple claiming to be a NZ Proim Minsta – I think their names were Jon and Phyllis Stein – in any event, it was the MSM’s wet dream come true! (TROOOLY!)

    • QoT 3.1

      IF Paddy did do as you say as regards job availability

      It was remiss of me to not link to the story in my original post – here it is. (I’d like to thank TV3 for having an actually-functional search engine on their site.)

  4. Te Reo Putake 4

    I’ve canvassed the room, and it’s evenly divided. The poweful ABQ faction are adamant that anybody but Queenie should lead the party and have pledged their 20 votes in caucus to the incumbent. The rest of the party are saying ‘shut up, Trevor’. David Shearer is also reported to be evenly divided, declaring a conflict of disinterest.

  5. Tim 5

    @TRP – that declaration of disinterest…was it because it was all too hard? or just that he realised he wasn’t up to it. I spose we may never know. Strum it – play it again Sam (Bo)

  6. One Tāne Huna 6

    I don’t know who you people think you are. Everyone know’s QoT candidacy is nothing without Matthew Hooten’s endorsement.

  7. marsman 7

    And Patrick Gower seemed such a nice intelligent boy until he had that swim in an overseas hotel pool with John Key.

  8. QoT you will have to be an MP first.  You will also need to join the party.

    You could think of running for Hutt South, the Duck’s seat.  I am sure that many would support you … 

  9. Colonial Viper 9

    Not until I’ve finished my first coffee …

    Important note for future reference…

Important links

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • Greens call for ring-fencing of state home proceeds
    The Government must ring-fence the proceeds of any state home sales and spend every dollar raised on more Government-built homes in order to address the housing crisis, the Green Party says.Prime Minister John Key has indicated that his first major… ...
    GreensBy Kevin Hague MP
    18 hours ago
  • English breaks his $6000 wages promise
    Just one month into the new year Bill English has already rowed back on his election promise of real wage rises for New Zealanders, says Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson. “During the election campaign National promised Kiwis that the average… ...
    6 days ago
  • National fails to produce evidence justifying attack on RMA
    The National Government is misusing evidence provided in the Motu report on planning rules to justify gutting the environmental protections secured by the Resource Management Act (RMA), says the Green Party today. The Motu group's research into the impacts of… ...
    GreensBy Julie Anne Genter MP
    6 days ago
  • National fails to produce evidence justifying attack on RMA
    The National Government is misusing evidence provided in the Motu report on planning rules to justify gutting the environmental protections secured by the Resource Management Act (RMA), says the Green Party today. The Motu group's research into the impacts of… ...
    GreensBy Julie Anne Genter MP
    6 days ago
  • RMA changes won’t knock a dollar off the cost of a new home
    The Government’s proposed changes to the RMA won’t increase the number of affordable homes or knock a dollar off the cost of building a new house, Labour Leader Andrew Little says.  “Tinkering with the RMA will not solve National’s housing… ...
    7 days ago
  • What is the real ‘price of the club’?
    What price is too high to join a club?  According to the current the New Zealand Prime Minister, the lives of young Kiwi men and women are a part of the package. In his latest BBC interview, John Key fails… ...
    GreensBy Kennedy Graham MP
    7 days ago
  • Palestine – NZ talks loudly in New York, does little at home
    Even though New Zealand has been gently slumbering over the last few weeks, world affairs have been progressing at its usual break-neck speed. There have been a number of significant steps since we all disbanded from the last parliamentary year.… ...
    GreensBy Kennedy Graham MP
    1 week ago
  • DOC debacle means hundreds may have missed out on fishing licences
    Hundreds of families and recreational fishers may have had their holidays spoiled by missing out on their fishing licences, with Conservation Minister Maggie Barry preferring instead to focus on more high profile portfolio priorities over the summer break, Labour’s Conservation… ...
    1 week ago
  • Effective action needed against pirate fishing boats
    New Zealand’s failure to detain pirate shipping vessels poaching endangered species in our region is simply not good enough, Labour’s Defence spokesperson Phil Goff says. “We send New Zealand naval vessels to the Arabian Gulf to board pirate ships there… ...
    1 week ago
  • Housing affordability crisis gets worse under National
    News that Auckland’s housing is now among the 10 most unaffordable in the world confirms the Government’s housing policy has failed, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “After six years in power, National’s housing policies have not fixed the housing… ...
    1 week ago
  • Rheumatic fever rates continue to soar despite millions spent on prevention...
    The Government’s $65 million spend on rheumatic fever prevention has made little impact on the alarmingly high rate of the disease among young New Zealanders, Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette King says. “Latest figures from ESR show there were 235 notified… ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Government wipes off $5 billion in tax debt
    Since coming to office, the National Government has written off $5 billion* in tax debt owed by more than a million, Labour MP Stuart Nash says. "There are two sides to the New Zealand economy under the National government: the… ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Labour adds its condemnation of Paris attack
    The Labour Party adds its voice to the international condemnation of today’s shocking attack on freedom of speech in Paris, Leader Andrew Little says. “The attack on the Charlie Hebdo newspaper is an assault on democracy and freedom of expression.… ...
    3 weeks ago
  • Petrol retailers and importers must pass on savings
    New Zealand’s petrol retailers and importers must start passing on savings to Kiwis motorists following the dramatic drop in the price of crude oil, Labour’s Energy Spokesman Stuart Nash says. “It is great news for Kiwi drivers that the price… ...
    3 weeks ago

  • Devoy: Honour our Holocaust survivors, don’t be a bystander
    70 years ago in the early hours of the morning and in the middle of a bitter snowstorm, Auschwitz Concentration Camp was liberated. Today is International Holocaust Remembrance Day, this afternoon some incredible New Zealanders – our own Holocaust survivors… ...
    15 hours ago
  • Lyttelton Port workers vote to escalate dispute
    Members of the Rail and Maritime Transport Union (RMTU) at Lyttelton Port today voted to escalate their industrial action. Around 200 RMTU members have been operating an overtime ban since 17 December and today they endorsed a series of full… ...
    15 hours ago
  • Newsletter – Free Press
    Welcome to the first ever edition of Free Press , ACT’s new regular bulletin. If you’re wondering why you’ve received this, we’ve used the same mailing list as Richard Prebble’s classic The Letter , and hope we can stimulate you… ...
    16 hours ago
  • Collins Picked to Return to Cabinet Before Next Election
    Judith Collins is this week picked to make a return to Cabinet before the next election, according to the combined wisdom of the 8000+ registered traders on New Zealand’s predictions market, iPredict. John Key is expected to remain leader of… ...
    16 hours ago
  • The other housing crisis
    CCS Disability Action hopes Prime Minister John Key’s state of the nation speech will address the other housing crisis as well. With an aging population, the number of people who need accessible private homes and social housing is rapidly growing.… ...
    17 hours ago
  • Prisoners and the right to vote
    Arthur Taylor and other serving prisoners, will take their case to end a ban on prisoners voting to the High Court in Auckland today (27 Jan 2015) http://www.radionz.co.nz/news/national/264583/prisoner-voting-case-in-high-court ...
    17 hours ago
  • Public health, union, and church groups slam TPP trade deal
    As secret Trans-Pacific (TPP) trade talks resume in New York, an unusually diverse mix of 47 Australian community groups including public health, environment, union, church, development aid and other groups have written an open letter to Trade Minister ...
    21 hours ago
  • Third world fishing policies put NZ to shame
    The union representing workers in seafood processing factories has today slammed New Zealand’s fishing policies which allow our fishing resources to be exported to other countries. ...
    21 hours ago
  • Warts and all expose of Taranaki’s oil and gas
    Taranaki’s relationship with oil and gas will be examined at an Environmental and Conservation Organisations of Aotearoa New Zealand (ECO) gathering this weekend. ...
    21 hours ago
  • Time for Maggie Barry to come clean on 1080
    National's new Conservation Minister Maggie Barrie appears to have gone into hiding over the raging controversy surrounding New Zealand's continuing use of 1080, according to Democrats for Social Credit health spokesman David Tranter. ...
    22 hours ago
  • No part of a warmongers club
    Peace Action Wellington condemns the prime minister’s commitment of military support for the US war in Iraq. Peace Action also condemns the casual and cavalier way in which the prime minister discusses joining the US-UK led war as being the… ...
    22 hours ago
  • Camp Gallipoli and RSA Commemorative ANZAC Day Event
    The Camp Gallipoli Foundation is delighted to have formed a partnership with the Returned and Services' Association (RSA) as part of the Anzac Day centenary commemorations. ...
    22 hours ago
  • Turangawaewae – Human Rights Commission e-newsletter
    Please find our new newsletter here . Highlighted stories this month: Treaty of Waitangi and the UN Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous People Dame Susan Devoy – Al Jazeera interview Equal Employment Opportunities Commissioner – The Equal Pay Act… ...
    2 days ago
  • Election for New Labour President
    Two nominations have been received for the position of Labour Party President vacated with the recent resignation of Moira Coatsworth. A vote will now proceed, closing on February 26th. ...
    2 days ago
  • Flags to be lowered to half-mast – Monday 26 January 2015
    At the request of the Prime Minister, the Right Honourable John Key, the New Zealand Flag is to be half-masted on all Government and public buildings on Monday 26 January 2015 , to mark the death of King Abdullah bin… ...
    2 days ago

Public service advertisements by The Standard

Current CO2 level in the atmosphere