web analytics

So. Very. Funny.

Written By: - Date published: 9:00 pm, May 16th, 2013 - 54 comments
Categories: you couldn't make this shit up - Tags: ,

Just in case you haven’t seen this work of genius by Danyl:

collins replicant

54 comments on “So. Very. Funny.”

  1. xtasy 1

    Judith the HARD one, and she is, so we deal to her, and she is shallow as to deal with in person, hard is a strange word for it.

    Judith betrayed on the MMP agenda, she did the hard line on law and order, she is denying the OIA reforms, recommended by the Commissioners in question, and much more, she is a DICTATOR woman, and some love it.

    So rethink, relearn, reevaluate, and see this for reflection, perhaps:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEj7jnR–Dg&list=PLD5B5A871D6D13C01

    NZ must as a people wake up and take charge, or are you going to want to be full sold out?

    • prism 1.1

      Good question xtasy
      NZ must as a people wake up and take charge, or are you going to want to be full sold out?

      This is a plea from anti nazi protesters. Has the same ring as your sentence.

      …why do you allow these men who are in power to rob you step by step, openly and in secret, of one domain of your rights after another, until one day nothing, nothing at all will be left but a mechanised state system presided over by criminals and drunks? Is your spirit already so crushed by abuse that you forget it is your right – or rather, your moral duty – to eliminate this system? (From Leaflet 3)

      I think this is the right link to three quotes from the White Rose anti nazi group.
      http://thestandard.org.nz/open-mike-11052013/#comment-631524

    • Steve Withers 1.2

      Tories love dictators. It’s at the very root, the heart, of being a Tory.

      • Tracey 1.2.1

        dictators dont require pesky things like consensus and votes.

      • King Kong 1.2.2

        So do the people. Their heart says Labour but their head wants a Tory to lower taxes, brutalise criminals and rule over them like a king.

        To paraphrase Sideshow Bob.

      • Populuxe1 1.2.3

        So no left winger said nice things about Castro or Stalin ever?

    • “she did the hard line on law and order”

      Only when it suits her. She had no interest in addressing a case of overt judicial fraud from 2011.

      “NZ must as a people wake up and take charge, or are you going to want to be full sold out?”

      Take charge of what, exactly, and how? Activism without a workable strategy will probably be a waste of time and energy.

      • One Anonymous Knucklehead 1.3.1

        A people’s common law tribunal will sort it all out. Why don’t you convene one?

      • Populuxe1 1.3.2

        Quite right. Special Victims Unit was by far the superior TV show.

    • Love the video, love the music, thanks

    • veutoviper 2.1

      So did I!

      And I particularly liked the one comment although not directly related:

      “Good news: 99% of voters didn’t see Shearer’s speech.

      Bad news: 100% of his caucus did.”

  2. vto 3

    People like Judith Collins are easy to handle.

    Just say no.

    • hey vto not sure if you saw this which answered a question you had the other day
      http://thestandard.org.nz/open-mike-15052013/#comment-633462

      • vto 3.1.1

        No I didn’t but it looks interesting. Let me have a gander and a wander back in five…

      • vto 3.1.2

        It was unintentional and not noticed.

        I have been following the constitution debate thingy from time to here and there and time.. On that Sunday I was actively involved in another activity and listening only side-on to te wireless. I obviously missed who the person was who asked the question and in evidence of that if you go back to the original post you will see I had some questions marks and uncertainty around that.

        What I heard was the question. The particular person of the question was immaterial to the question, as I was whistling while I worked and missed it. But mine ears perked at it from thence forth listening more closely. The panelists all declined to answer. That was very odd, given the situation, hence my post.

        Note that the host, a mr simon price i think, allowed the question to be raised by mr asnell. There were only a handful of questions permitted – why would mr price endulge mr ansell? That is a question (of limited use).

        I responded to this to weka yesterday or so on the thread.

        The mistake aorund the questionnaire is immaterial to the point raised. Once you glean out the flotsam and jetsam.

        John Ansell is someone else of another world.

        We should keep talking and not succumb to assumption. It is good. Weka was very concentrated in her responses and missed or avoided countless wider and more important points made. Don’t lose what I said there marty mars, it was real and true. I know you read it and understood it despite weka’s attempt to zero in on this error.

        I don’t think that has covered all of the things. Onwards with good intent is the only way.

        • veutoviper 3.1.2.1

          The host was Stephen Price, a Wellington barrister who specialises in media law and blogs at

          http://www.medialawjournal.co.nz/

        • marty mars 3.1.2.2

          The respected panelists didn’t answer because it was a loaded question from a known fool.

          The assumptions you made in your original post were false – what you said about the panelists, the question and the wider implications of talking about the issues was not true.

          The list I presented was woeful but not in the way you mean – put your own list up vto and let’s get the debate going – I’m not going to trawl through your comments looking for quotes – been there done that, and posted on it in the past, remember…
          http://mars2earth.blogspot.co.nz/2012/03/vto-and-me.html

          • weka 3.1.2.2.1

            Ugg, hadn’t seen that write up before. That makes me very angry.

            vto “… and through inter-marriage and conquest these migrants merged with the resident Waitaha and took over authority of Te Waipounamu.” Ngai Tahu website. LOL, this is exactly what I was referring to. A painting of history at odds with the reality. For example, why write “…through inter-marriage and conquest … took over authority” which implies inter-marriage was somehow equal at the time to conquest? I tell you why – because it makes for a better looking history when compared to writing “though military conquest the Waitaha were conquered and authority assumed by mamoe at the end of a taiaha. … ” As for inter-marriage, how long after the “conquest” was that? Or was it a result of the rape by soldiers?

            Vto, all I can say is try asking those questions face to face within Maori communities or on a Marae. And make sure you ask the women. Until you are willing to do that you are full of shit and a coward. Looking at tourism site boards, and then applying your own interpretation to what Kai Tahu write on their website without knowing anything useful about the deeper reality of Southern Maori and their histories is just wrong.

            Sorry, I have alot of respect for you in other things you write on ts, but in this you are very very ignorant. I can hope that one day you will walk far enough into Te Ao Maori to understand just how ignorant you were in 2012.

            • Populuxe1 3.1.2.2.1.1

              I suggest reading Hana O’Reagan’s excellent book Ko Tahu Ko Au – Kāi Tahu Tribal identity. Intermarriage began very early in the South Island, particulalry as Scottish and Irish settlers came from cultural patterns relatively sympathetic to Māori tikanga. The use of the word “conquest” is perhaps a tad emotive out of context – a metaphorical, economic, psychological, and cultural conquest of Kāi Tahu, certainly, nonetheless terrible – but the Lad Wars were strictly a North Island phenomenon, though there was at one point a plan to establish “native reserves” in Canterbury – a notion quickly discarded. Even the individual provincial govenments functioned quite seperately. It is a mistake to view both islands as sharing an identical history of colonisation – that is a reductive simplification of a very complex/multiplex historical process. Some people might say that the colonisation of New South Wales and Victoria were genocides, but out of context that would be to do a disservice to what happened in Tasmania. I also have to wince a bit whenever some respected Kaumātua bandies the word “Holocaust” around.

        • weka 3.1.2.3

          vto, I accept that it wasn’t intentional. But am disappointed with your response now.

          “The mistake aorund the questionnaire is immaterial to the point raised. Once you glean out the flotsam and jetsam.”

          No. It’s. Not. Your whole argument was that a good question was asked, and that it was strange that the panelists all refused to answer, and your conclusion was that they were afraid to. You were wrong vto, just admit it and then we can move on to more productive discussion.

          Further, the very nature of the question was racist, given who was asking it and why. Can you even acknowledge that now that you see the context?

          Anyhow, here is the actual question, devoid of the immediately surrounding context:

          Given that polls tell us that 80% of New Zealanders are distressed at seeing their country being slowly surrendered to the part descendants of the minority of Maori who breached the Treaty by rebelling against the Crown in the 1860s, could we use a republican referendum process to entrench racial equality?

          In what ways is this a useful question?

          What do you think is really being asked here? (given it is an oddly phrase question).

          Do you have any qualms about the implication that Pakeha are unfairly treated as a ‘race’, or do you agree?

          Do you believe that there has ever been credible research that asked NZers how they felt about NZ being slowly surrendered to the half caste descendants of Maori rebels?

      • vto 3.1.3

        Marty the list is a good idea but the first cut is woeful. A collation is perhaps a better way…

  3. yes very funny – I wonder if there are actually any humans in that cabinet instead of the bloody replicants

  4. Descendant Of Sssmith 5

    Now that I’ve read that I can’t unread it.

    My favourite movie and Judith Collins in the same sentence – aaarrggghhhhhh

    Thanks a lot.

  5. sukieDamson 6

    I must admit I find it hard to reconcile the Collins as next leader meme with the buffoonery I hear whenever she opens her mouth.

  6. Ad 7

    I prefer Colins to Shearer.

    Remember when Clark stared down anyone? It’s sexy, because we see a politician wielding power skillfully.
    Thats what makes her the natural successor. Shearer head to head with Collins on tv anyone?
    Get ready to weep.

    • karol 7.1

      Clark and Collins? Chalk and cheese.

      Spot the differences….. it’s not that hard.

      • Ad 7.1.1

        Go right ahead list them.
        Its the political-force similarities that make them both so attractive.

        • Colonial Viper 7.1.1.1

          And if she’d just wear high heeled shiny black lace up vinyl boots in the House it would be perfection, right?

          • Ad 7.1.1.1.1

            I’d just settle for knew how to dress.
            It shouldn’t matter, but image really does.

            • karol 7.1.1.1.1.1

              The differences go much deeper than image. Clark’s strength was in her grasp of the extensive details of policies and issues. Collins just relies on the perception of toughness based on a superficial understanding..

    • ghostrider888 7.2

      sad Ad; Collins stands for everything I despise; she is the worst sort of lawyering bully; makes me feel disgust just thinking of her.

  7. millsy 8

    I don’t know whether to laugh or shudder.

    • Even if you don’t know of the replicant meme, she’s acquiescing to a slanderer. Slander is an essential part of the Crown’s modus operandi, but it usually isn’t recognised as such.

  8. Tracey 9

    If the turtle was walking through the dessert instead, would she save the turtle to rescue the dessert?

  9. dewithiel 10

    It’s a pity she’s not a Serco, oops, I meant Tyrell Corporation Nexus-6 model which, of course, was meant to last only four years.

    • Rhinocrates 10.1

      She’s a rather clumsily-executed waxwork effigy of Thatcher, I think. I wonder if the Tory planners are wondering if they can persuade Argentina to invade the Chatham Islands?

  10. Populuxe1 11

    I think she would have ripped the tortoise apart and eaten it to survive. She’s good at that.

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • Government scuppers affordability requirements
    The Government must explain why the panel considering Auckland’s unitary plan removed affordability requirements at the behest of the Ministry of Business, Innovation and Employment and Housing NZ, Leader of the Opposition Andrew Little says. “Labour welcomes the Independent Hearing ...
    14 hours ago
  • National pushes on with failed state house sell-off
    Merchant bankers, overseas companies and property developers will be lining up to buy 364 state houses in Horowhenua during two days of “market sounding” meetings starting tomorrow, Leader of the Opposition Andrew Little says. “Despite a housing crisis and families ...
    18 hours ago
  • QUESTIONS FOR (ORAL) ANSWER- WEDNESDAY 27TH OF JULY
    While Parliament might be in recess, there are still plenty of things that Ministers need to answer for. So the Labour team has put together six of the best questions that the Government should be answering today (plus a special ...
    19 hours ago
  • Andrew Little’s International Affairs Speech
    Tena Koutou Katoa Can I begin by acknowledging: Sir Doug Kidd, President, NZ Institute of International Affairs Maty Nikkhou-O’Brien, Executive Director, who did all the organising for today’s event. Labour’s foreign affairs spokesperson David Shearer. Victoria University of Wellington law ...
    19 hours ago
  • Inquiry into surgical mesh needed now
    The Government must urgently launch a Ministerial inquiry into surgical mesh after more than 500 patients have lodged claims of complications with the ACC, say Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette King.  “This is the most widespread crisis involving surgical devices in ...
    20 hours ago
  • Crime on the increase yet again
    Police Minister Judith Collins’ contention that crime is falling has proven to be wrong yet again, with latest Police statistics showing an increase in most crimes, Labour’s Police spokesperson Stuart Nash says. “Figures for June 2016 show an increase in ...
    2 days ago
  • Major reform of careers and apprenticeships to meet Future of Work
    The next Labour Government will transform careers advice in high schools to ensure every student has a personalised career plan, Leader of the Opposition Andrew Little says. “Today I am announcing the next Labour Government will commit to a major ...
    2 days ago
  • DOC struggles on the pest front undermine Nats’ predator-free promise
    The Government’s planned predator-free initiative comes at the same time as the Department of Conservation is facing major challenges to keep pest numbers down, says Labour’s Conservation spokesperson Nanaia Mahuta.  “DOC’s annual report shows it failed on 5 out of ...
    2 days ago
  • QUESTIONS FOR (ORAL) ANSWER- TUESDAY 26TH OF JULY
    While Parliament might be in recess, there are still plenty of things that Ministers need to answer for. So the Labour team has put together six of the best questions that the Government should be answering today (plus a special ...
    2 days ago
  • Unfunded CYF a ticking time bomb
    The Ministry of Social Development is sitting on a ticking time bomb with Child, Youth and Family out of pocket by $56 million despite increased demand for its services, Labour’s Children’s spokesperson Jacinda Ardern says. “The new entity that’s replacing ...
    2 days ago
  • Lack of any real funding in predator free proposal
    Predator Free New Zealand is a laudable idea but the Government has not committed any real money into killing New Zealand’s pests, says Labour’s Conservation spokesperson Nanaia Mahuta.  “The $28 million earmarked for this project is just to set up ...
    3 days ago
  • Andrew Little Speech to LGNZ Conference
    Thank you for having me here today. Local Government New Zealand’s work of advocating for New Zealand’s 78 local councils is critical as we upgrade New Zealand’s economy, and make sure it’s delivering for all our people. Whether in Auckland, ...
    3 days ago
  • John Key must sack out-of-depth Trade Minister
    The Prime Minister must sack Todd McClay for failing to do his job as Trade Minister and be on top of a significant potential threat to some of our biggest exporters, Opposition Leader Andrew Little says. “Todd McClay is clearly ...
    3 days ago
  • 45,000 Kiwis sent back to their GPs
    Last year nearly 45,000 Kiwis were sent back to their GPs without getting to see specialists they were referred to, says Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette King. “This is a shocking figure and underlines how far the cut of $1.7 billion ...
    3 days ago
  • Half a million smells like pure cronyism
    The National/ACT Government’s decision to pump hundreds of thousands of taxpayer dollars into a new lobby group to advocate for charter schools shows just how much of a failure their ideological experiment has become, Labour’s Education spokesperson Chris Hipkins says. ...
    3 days ago
  • Select committee changes Kermadec/Rangitāhua Ocean Sanctuary Bill
    Photo by Tom Hitchon Parliament’s Local Government and Environment Committee has made many changes to the Kermadec/Rangitāhua Ocean Sanctuary Bill in response to public submissions, particularly submissions from iwi authorities and Te Ohu Kaimoana.   Read the amended Bill and the ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage
    5 days ago
  • Housing map a hit as crisis spreads across NZ
    More than 55,000 New Zealanders have used Labour’s interactive housing map in its first week to see how the housing crisis is affecting their local community, Labour Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “Our innovative map shows the housing crisis is ...
    6 days ago
  • Bridges must come clean about fraud within transport
    Hundreds of thousands of dollars of public money have gone missing and  the Minister of Transport, Simon Bridges must come clean after the Labour party revealed that a senior manager is being investigated for serious fraud, says Labour’s Transport Spokesperson ...
    6 days ago
  • Labour supports Spencer victory
    Labour congratulates Margaret Spencer for her tireless efforts in challenging the Government over family carer rights, says Labour’s Deputy Leader Annette King. ...
    6 days ago
  • US Warship visit welcomed by Labour
    Labour sees the United States warship visit as a red letter day for New Zealand’s non-nuclear status, which is core to our identity and has defined us a nation for 30 years, says Labour’s Deputy Leader Annette King. ...
    7 days ago
  • Time for honest dairy sector conversation
    ...
    7 days ago
  • What next? Dog kennels?
    Social Housing Minister Paula Bennett needs to explain why the Government thinks it is acceptable for it to refer families to live in garages and sheds, says Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford. “This is a new low, just when you ...
    7 days ago
  • Banks bust a move, Government possum in the headlights
    Three of the big four banks have acted responsibly by bringing the shutters down on property speculators earlier than required by the Reserve Bank, says Labour’s housing spokesperson Phil Twyford. “It’s a shame the Government isn’t as motivated to act ...
    7 days ago
  • Latest OECD dairy forecast raises serious questions for economy
    The latest global dairy price forecast shows that New Zealand dairy farmers will not reach a break-even payout before 2019 at the earliest, and will not reach the dairy price factored into this year’s Budget until after 2025, Labour’s Finance spokesperson ...
    7 days ago
  • National’s reckless, out of touch approach to economy exposed
    Today’s economic assessment from the Reserve Bank highlights the danger to the New Zealand economy from a National government that is recklessly complacent in the face of a housing crisis and a struggling export sector, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says. ...
    7 days ago
  • GP’s visits get more expensive
      Visiting the GP is set to become more expensive after the Government ignored warnings that people were not receiving access to affordable  healthcare, says Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette King.  “Over 400,000 New Zealanders who should be able to access ...
    1 week ago
  • Farm prices bear brunt of dairy downturn
    The slump in dairy prices that has seen farm prices drop to their lowest level since 2012 and down a third from their peak in 2014 will be of concern to farmers, banks and our overall financial stability, Labour’s Finance ...
    1 week ago
  • Reserve Bank “gets on with it”, National carries on in denial
    The proposal by the Reserve Bank to tighten loan to value ratios for investors shows they are prepared to do their bit to crack down on speculators, while National is still stuck in denial mode, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says. ...
    1 week ago
  • Housing crisis holds up interest rate cuts
    The housing crisis that National still wants to deny is stifling the New Zealand economy, says Labour’s Finance Spokesperson Grant Robertson. “The latest Consumers Price Index shows that all prices excluding housing and household utilities decreased 0.5 per cent – ...
    1 week ago
  • Housing crisis holds up interest rate cuts
    The housing crisis that National still wants to deny is stifling the New Zealand economy, says Labour’s Finance Spokesperson Grant Robertson. “The latest Consumers Price Index shows that all prices excluding housing and household utilities decreased 0.5 per cent – ...
    1 week ago
  • Govt’s state house sell-off ramping up
    Government plans to ramp up the state house sell-off by selling another 1000 houses in 2016/17 will mean more families in need missing out, says Leader of the Opposition Andrew Little. “New figures show the Government plans to sell 1000 ...
    1 week ago
  • Govt’s state house sell-off ramping up
    Government plans to ramp up the state house sell-off by selling another 1000 houses in 2016/17 will mean more families in need missing out, says Leader of the Opposition Andrew Little. “New figures show the Government plans to sell 1000 ...
    1 week ago
  • National must reassure exporters on dumping case
        The National Government needs to show our key exporters that they are in control of any anti-dumping case against China before it damages some of our most important industries, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says.     ...
    2 weeks ago
  • National must reassure exporters on dumping case
        The National Government needs to show our key exporters that they are in control of any anti-dumping case against China before it damages some of our most important industries, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says.     ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Papers describe litany of incredulity
    Treasury documents which slate the Government’s plans for a national bowel screening programme confirm the proposal was nothing more than a political stunt to cover up underfunding of the health sector, Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette Kings says.  The papers were ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Effect of rampant house prices widens
    The latest house price figures from REINZ show the housing crisis expanding throughout the country, says Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford. “We are seeing steep increases in median house prices in Central Otago Lakes – up 42.4% in the last ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Public invited to have say on homelessness
    People who are homeless, those who were once homeless, those working with the homeless and concerned New Zealanders are being asked to share their experiences and solutions to this growing issue with the Cross-Party Homelessness Inquiry. This inquiry was launched ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Sorry seems to be the hardest word
    An apology from Hekia Parata to the people of Christchurch is long overdue, Labour's Education spokesperson Chris Hipkins says. "As if the earthquakes weren't traumatic enough, Hekia Parata and the Ministry of Education then attacked the one thing that had ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Housing crisis affecting more than 98 per cent of NZ
    Labour’s new housing map shows the housing crisis is now affecting more than 98 per cent of New Zealand, Leader of the Opposition Andrew Little says. “Housing pressures have seen house prices rise faster than wages in all but four ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Uber might not be a taxi firm but it must pay tax
    Uber needs to explain how it paid only $9000 in tax when it earned $1m in revenue and is one of the fastest growing companies in the country, says Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson. “Uber New Zealand appears to be ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Tax changes should have been made 3 years ago
    National could have avoided the international stain on our reputation from the Panama Papers if it had let IRD’s planned review of foreign trusts go ahead three years ago, instead of now belatedly acting because of the Shewan recommendations, says ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Government must stop state house sell-off
    The Government must immediately pull the plug on its planned sell-off of state houses in order to stop the housing crisis getting any worse, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “While Paula Bennett is putting people into transit camps in ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Thoughts on Labour’s new housing policies
    The Labour Party launched its package of ideas to fix the housing crisis over the weekend. Their ideas match ours in many ways. This is good news, because it means that when we change the government we’ll be ready to ...
    GreensBy James Shaw
    2 weeks ago
  • Thoughts on Labour’s new housing policies
    The Labour Party launched its package of ideas to fix the housing crisis over the weekend. Their ideas match ours in many ways. This is good news, because it means that when we change the government we’ll be ready to ...
    GreensBy James Shaw
    2 weeks ago
  • Thoughts on Labour’s new housing policies
    The Labour Party launched its package of ideas to fix the housing crisis over the weekend. Their ideas match ours in many ways. This is good news, because it means that when we change the government we’ll be ready to ...
    GreensBy James Shaw
    2 weeks ago
  • Housing crisis drives household debt to record levels
    The Finance Minister must be woken from his slumber by Westpac’s report today that says house prices have largely driven household debt to record levels and are rising at a pace faster than other developed economies, says Labour’s Finance spokesperson ...
    2 weeks ago
  • English denies dividend decision made – Joyce should delete his account
    National must explain who is right in the Housing NZ dividend debacle, after Bill English said no decision had been made on a payment for the next two years, in direct contrast to Steven Joyce, says Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Pressure forces Govt to make policy on the hoof
    Steven Joyce’s surprise announcement that Housing NZ will no longer be used as a cash cow has forced the Finance Minister to make one of National’s biggest ever U-turns, Labour’s Finance spokesperson Grant Robertson says. “After years of insisting the ...
    2 weeks ago
  • 10-fold more affordable houses under Labour
    New data showing homeownership rates continue to fall and more Kiwis than ever rent, highlights why Labour’s plan to build 10 times more affordable housing in Auckland is so desperately needed, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “Labour’s Affordable Housing ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Out of excuses, Brownlee resorts to scare tactics
    Gerry Brownlee’s ridiculous suggestion that Labour would nationalise Christchurch’s east frame shows National has resorted to scare tactics to hide its failure to build desperately needed affordable houses in our city, Labour's Canterbury spokesperson Megan Woods says. “Plans put in ...
    2 weeks ago

Public service advertisements by The Standard

Current CO2 level in the atmosphere