web analytics
The Standard
Advertising

Taxpayers Union attacks Prince George

Written By: - Date published: 12:00 pm, March 5th, 2014 - 15 comments
Categories: act, john key, Satire - Tags: , ,

Prince GeorgeBy Susan Nact and Tracy Whatshite

The Taxpayers Union has hit out at Prince George for wasting tax payers money by accompanying his parents, The Prince and Princess of Cambridge on their Royal Visit to New Zealand. Spokesman for the TPU, Jordan Williams lashed out at the Prince saying “We expect that he will cost the New Zealand tax payer approximately $550 in nappies, baby food and sundry expenses while he is here; although since he is an infant, we understand he will not have to pay airfares. Even so, we are astounded at this blatant misuse of taxpayers money ”.

George will be based at Government House during the nine day Royal visit. He will be attending just one function, a Plunket event with other babies around his age at Government House.

” I think you would be able to count on one hand the number of babies attending that Plunket function”, said Williams, quick to add that he wasn’t criticizing George for being a baby.

“He will also be accommodated at the taxpayers expense at Government House doing very little. Apparently, there won’t even be a Buzzy Bee photo opportunity as there was when Prince William was his age,” said a riled up Williams.

“If babies want to lie around all day and not actively engage in any form of employment, then they can expect the Taxpayers Union to bring this to the attention of the tax paying public.” Williams said. “After all, there are work opportunities for George while he is in New Zealand. He could attend a number of functions with his parents and have publicity shots taken with John Key for the election, if he really wanted to work”.

Jamie Whyte, the new leader of ACT, waded in (over his head) to the debate and said “George’s visit is being paid by the taxpayer, but it is light on duties.  It’s time George learnt to stand on his own two feet instead of relying on the taxpayers of New Zealand, England and his parents to provide for him. On behalf of Act and all Right thinking members of the tax paying public, we are utterly sick to death of this Nanny State, where we are always expected to pick up the tab for bludgers.”

We sought comment on this issue from the ACT candidate for Epsom, but we couldn’t remember who he was because Jamie Whyte seems to have completely overshadowed him. We thought it was possible that it was Paul Goldsmith.

We were however, able to make contact with John Key who agreed to speak to Tracy Whatshite. Key was quick to defend George, saying,“Given George is a member of the top 1%,  I am comfortable that we can afford his visit”.

When challenged by Whatshite that in total the Royal visit would cost one million dollars, Key said he was comfortable he would get his moneys worth from the visit.

15 comments on “Taxpayers Union attacks Prince George”

  1. Populuxe1 1

    Well now I want to see anti-Royalists implode as they try to get their heads around being in agreement with the Taxpayer’s Union.
    get’s popcorn

    • Lanthanide 1.1

      You do know this is satire, right?

      I really can’t tell.

      • Populuxe1 1.1.1

        Yes, sigh, I can tell the difference. I’m not Colin Craig.
        I was hoping to set up a joke about Oliver Cromwell, but you spoiled it.

        • Tracey 1.1.1.1

          LOL

          • Tim 1.1.1.1.1

            “I’m not Colin Craig.”
            …. at least in name. Self-righteousness, and certain other obvious characteristics relating to C.C’s preoccupation not withstanding.
            The two of you would probably get on like a house on fire if you could both get over yourselves.

            • Populuxe1 1.1.1.1.1.1

              Given that I support mostly socially liberal causes, I doubt it somehow.

              • Tim

                CC would profess to do likewise (as long as it didn’t offend His various prejudices).
                When you give up on the North Shore, Oi’ve an ideal candidate that claims progressive creds in the Easten subs of Wgtn ( just as soon as he retires ). You’ll probably be able to go dutch on an NZSO sub sometime in the very near, ‘Cos sure as shit your idols won’t be strumming up anytime soon – unless of course it can be constructed by way of some sort of philanthropic endeavour (whereby youre NAMED as a benefactor of course)!
                BTW …. I’ve a load of cheap collagen I want to offload. I was watching OZ parliament, and was thinking that ‘thing’ seated behind Tarn Yabbit might be a target -except Coles Cranes might be put out of bizzniss (let alone the QANTAS issues).
                Got any suggesjinz?

                • Tim

                  Never mind … I’ll go to Bronny direct (nothing like the horse’s mouth)
                  Make sure you go to dad tho’ before you reply (and I’ll be sure to go to ‘mumsy’)

  2. aerobubble 3

    Three strikes is a huge cost on taxpayers, but not a word out of the taxpayers union about ACT policy and extension of the policy.

    • Richard McGrath 3.1

      Good point, but there would be some savings in the social costs of criminal activity that may exceed the cost of keeping the crims alive, once the recidivist offenders are locked away.

  3. Tracey 4

    Joking aside, surely the full cost of the visit is known prior to the visit? This would be especially so given how choreographed it has to be? So, estimates of 1m dollars ought to be close tot he mark?

    No comment from Jamie cousinsuncle about the tenancy of royalty to marry each other to cousins??

    • Hayden 4.1

      I, for one, am delighted at the opportunity for the taxpayer to pay for John Key’s 9-day photo-op, whatever the cost.

  4. Rosie 5

    Lolz galore Nact N’ Whatshite

Important links

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • “Improving”
    End-of-Year process positive for Novopay, Steven Joyce, 17 January 2014:Minister Responsible for Novopay Steven Joyce says a 100 per cent completion rate for schools involved in the End-of-Year process and an accompanying low error rate are tributes to the hard...
    No Right Turn | 30-07
  • Farmers don’t set out to pollute our rivers
    It can be easy to vilify farmers. But no farmer sets out to create pollution, and the evidence suggests that many farmers are either already acting responsibly or that they are lifting their game. In particular, dairy farmers are acting....
    Gareth’s World | 30-07
  • Guide to economic evaluation part 3: What is agglomeration?
    Debates over major transport investments often get caught up in arguments over benefit-cost ratios, or BCRs. In recent years, projects such as the Transmission Gully and Puhoi to Warkworth motorways and the City Rail Link have been criticised for their...
    Transport Blog | 30-07
  • Where to now for Colin and the Conservatives?
    It’s (almost*) official – there’s no deal for Colin Craig in East Coast Bays. Murray McCully will not be knifed, thrown under a bus or given concrete shoes to go swimming in. Given that Mr Craig had already accepted he...
    Occasionally erudite | 29-07
  • Real men say sorry
    There are a couple of universal truths that all men should be aware of. Firstly, it takes a bigger man to walk away. Of course men can be accused of being weak if they don't confront their problems with violence,...
    The Jackal | 29-07
  • Why my children took part in a playful protest against LEGO’s partner...
    Jessica Edberg is a mother of two. Her daughter, Lily, aged 7, took part in a playful protest yesterday against LEGO's partnership with Shell. 50 kids in total protested by building three giant LEGO Arctic animals outside of Shell's HQ...
    Greenpeace NZ blog | 29-07
  • Race to the Bottom or a Fairer Society?
    In a season when some small parties are indulging in competitive racism it is important to remind ourselves of the great gift of living in our country, a Pacific nation with a Treaty that affirms a peaceful negotiation. The Orewa...
    frogblog | 29-07
  • 3 reasons to vote this election
    Here are three Bills before Parliament that have not passed their third and final vote. The next Parliament will decide if these three Bills become law or not. If you want to have your...
    Tertiary Education Union | 29-07
  • Poll of Polls update – 30 July 2014
    So the latest One News Colmar Brunton poll came out on Sunday. I was up in Tauranga, preparing for a trial, which meant no blogging (plus, it’s remarkably difficult to update a Poll of Polls and then blog about it,...
    Occasionally erudite | 29-07
  • TSB Today: Broken English
    In my post at The Daily Blog today — Broken English, broken government, broken climate — I take a look Bill English’s unguarded comments on climate change. Apparently, it’s a non-issue. As you might expect, I am somewhat less than...
    Hot Topic | 29-07
  • The truth about women
    Marianne Elliott is a former employee of the Human Rights Commission here, and the author of Zen Under Fire, about her time working for human rights in Afghanistan. Here's the remarkable and must-read guest post she has put up about...
    The Hand Mirror | 29-07
  • When the mainstream media go feral: the descent into sheer farce, according...
    . . It had to happen, I guess… The media pack-campaign against Labour Leader David Cunliffe has managed to  plumb new depths of absurdity. On TV3, on 24 July,  TV3/Tova O’Brien ran this report on their 6PM News bulletin, about...
    Frankly Speaking | 29-07
  • When the mainstream media go feral: the descent into sheer farce, according...
    . . It had to happen, I guess… The media pack-campaign against Labour Leader David Cunliffe has managed to  plumb new depths of absurdity. On TV3, on 24 July,  TV3/Tova O’Brien ran this report on their 6PM News bulletin, about...
    Frankly Speaking | 29-07
  • $212 million in spending on roads with few benefits
    A couple of days ago I received a bunch of documents from an OIA request to the NZTA on the $212 million in regional road spending announced recently. I haven’t been able to look at them yet seeing as I’m away however...
    Transport Blog | 29-07
  • State Department cuts through the acid political environment on oceans and ...
    Secretary Kerry hosted a remarkable conference in June called simply Our Ocean. It enlisted international policy makers, scientists, and the private sector to take action to ensure a healthy ocean for the future. The conference laid out the science, impacts, and...
    Skeptical Science | 29-07
  • Vote Choice: Winston Peters – the Conservative
    Vote Choice: Winston Peters – the (well, a) Conservative This week’s featured politician is Winston Peters. According to Peters life begins at conception because…the royal baby (?!). We know this because, again, Bob McCroskie from Family First did the hard work for us...
    ALRANZ | 29-07
  • National Makes Jokes About Domestic Violence, and Now Unemployment
    How far we have fallen in NZ that our current Government spends much of it’s time in Parliament making jokes about domestic violence, and today – unemployment. Key and some of his dishonest thieving Ministers have in the past few...
    An average kiwi | 29-07
  • Guest post at the Standard: Walking through the wrong door is the least of ...
    I have a guest post over at the Standard right now – Walking through the wrong door is the least of Gerry’s problems. Jump over there and read it in full! What we need in Christchurch is more houses, now....
    Rebuilding Christchurch | 29-07
  • Minor Party pre-campaign pontifications
    A look at the tracking polls for small parties helps explain what’s been happening over the last few days (larger interactive version here); The Conservatives are only slightly higher than they were last election suggesting they’ll get 2.6% max. Probably...
    DimPost | 29-07
  • Minor Party pre-campaign pontifications
    A look at the tracking polls for small parties helps explain what’s been happening over the last few days (larger interactive version here); The Conservatives are only slightly higher than they were last election suggesting they’ll get 2.6% max. Probably...
    DimPost | 29-07
  • An abhorrent innovation
    The Rt. Hon. Humphrey Horswell, QSM gives his opinion on the recently-released National Party list...
    Imperator Fish | 29-07
  • Stuart’s 100: #2 Whitcoulls Queen Street
    Urban designer Stuart Houghton has set himself a personal project of coming up with 100 ideas for improving Auckland at the rate of one a day. He is Tweeting them here: @HoughtonSd  Discussing this project with Stuart he said that “I see the city is...
    Transport Blog | 29-07
  • The OIA and the Statutes Amendment Bill
    Back in February the government introduced a Statutes Amendment Bill to make numerous "technical, short, and non-controversial" amendments to legislation. The bill included several amendments to the OIA and LGOIMA which I thought fell into that category. The bill was...
    No Right Turn | 29-07
  • How We Solve The Income Inequality Problem
    click here for some very good ideas from the New Economics Foundation...
    Closing the Gap | 29-07
  • How to make farmers clean up their act
    Order them to stop milking until they've fixed their effluent problems:A Thames farming company has been hit with a $47,000 fine and ordered to stop milking until it fixed the overflowing effluent system at its Kopu farm. The order came...
    No Right Turn | 29-07
  • The Truth About What Keeps People In Poverty From Those Who Live It
    Click here to read this report from the Family 100 Research Project July 2014...
    Closing the Gap | 29-07
  • Eye Candy, Window Dressing and Deep Pockets.
    I came back from six weeks abroad to see the beginning of the Internet Party’s “party party” launches. It leaves me with some questions. It seems that what the Internet Party has done is this. Using Kim Dotcom’s wallet as...
    Kiwipolitico | 29-07
  • Wealth, Income and Inequality in Australia.
    worth a read click here...
    Closing the Gap | 29-07
  • World News Brief, Tuesday July 29
    Top of the AgendaLull in Gaza as Pressure for Cease-Fire Mounts...
    Pundit | 29-07
  • National’s roads are pure pork
    Last month the government announced it would be spending $212 million on regional roads. Every single one of the priority projects (and eight of nine lower priority projects) is in a National-held electorate, which suggested immediately that this was pre-election...
    No Right Turn | 29-07
  • Another fluoridation whopper from Declan Waugh
    Declan Waugh is a self-proclaimed “scientist and fluoride researcher” who seems to spend all his time misrepresenting and distorting  scientific literature and health data to promote his anti-fluoride cause. Waugh has an avid following, among fellow anti-fluoride activists and propagandists. The...
    Open Parachute | 29-07
  • Whyte supremacy
    Emphatically, he says, an ACT party led by Whyte would not go to war on Treaty issues. “I’ve got no interest in Maori-bashing as a political game.” Dr Jamie Whyte back in January when he assumed leadership of ACT.  The...
    DimPost | 29-07
  • Whyte supremacy
    Emphatically, he says, an ACT party led by Whyte would not go to war on Treaty issues. “I’ve got no interest in Maori-bashing as a political game.” Dr Jamie Whyte back in January when he assumed leadership of ACT.  The...
    DimPost | 29-07
  • New Fisk
    It's not just radicalised Islamists - what about foreign fighters who flock to the other side?...
    No Right Turn | 29-07
  • How we should deal with rorting MPs
    Prosecute them for theft:Former parliamentary speaker Peter Slipper tried three times to have criminal charges thrown out of court following claims he misused his travel entitlements during several trips to some of the Canberra region's most prestigious wineries. But three...
    No Right Turn | 29-07
  • July 14 AT Board Meeting
    The Auckland Transport Board is meeting today and as usual I’ve had a look through the papers to see if there is anything interesting. Below is the collection of items or comments that caught my eye. The rest of this...
    Transport Blog | 29-07
  • Powerful and Cold-hearted
    click here to read this compelling article ...
    Closing the Gap | 29-07
  • Wilkinson and Picket Lectures in New Zealand
    Click here to get these lectures. Folks who missed the Douglas Robb lectures last month can view them here l...
    Closing the Gap | 29-07
  • The Changing Priorities Of Protest
    The Changing Face Of Protest: In marked contrast to the theologically- and ideologically-driven protest movements of the 1960s, 70s and 80s, contemporary protest, like this demonstration against the latest Israeli assault on Gaza, tends to be led by those whose stake in...
    Bowalley Road | 29-07
  • Why Voters Aren’t Angrier About Economic Inequality
    This is the USA but there are strong parallels here in New zealand ...
    Closing the Gap | 28-07
  • Goodbye Nick Smith
    On the back of recently trying to silence DOC over their concerns about the impact of the Ruataniwha irrigation project on water quality in central Hawke's Bay, Nick Smith is once again bullying a statuary body with threats that clearly...
    The Jackal | 28-07
  • Minister for Conservation of What?