web analytics
The Standard
Advertising

Try hard Key’s audition tape

Written By: - Date published: 1:29 pm, August 6th, 2011 - 37 comments
Categories: Minister for Overseas Holidays, youtube - Tags:

January 2009. Jobs are being lost at 4,000 per week. Key and his government have just come back from a month long holiday. First thing he does: makes an audition tape for Letterman. Notice how all the jokes are taking the mickey out of our country. Makes you real proud.

37 comments on “Try hard Key’s audition tape”

  1. You know that David Letterman’s late show is a comedy show, right? And despite this being pretty weak comedy, it kind of makes sense to try do something that takes the piss out of NZ to get Letterman’s attention, rather than send them a tourism NZ brocuhre?

    Ya’ll can do better than this, not even Goff has a problem with this.

    http://www.3news.co.nz/Goff-not-attacking-Key-over-Letterman-appearance/tabid/419/articleID/221255/Default.aspx

    • Colonial Viper 1.1

      You know that David Letterman’s late show is a comedy show, right?

      Hence it makes sense why Clown PM wanted on, even at cost to the tax payer.

      I would suggest that Key keep his day job, but well, :twisted:

    • Zetetic 1.2

      James. The question is why the PM is spending his time trying to get on a comedy show when 800 jobs a day are being lost. Not whether his audition tape is good but why he’s making one at all.

      • law 1.2.1

        I am surprised that you are asking that question. The intent of getting on the show was pretty clear, raise the profile of NZ, attract more tourists. More tourists = more jobs. Effectiveness of being on the Lettermen show is what you probably should be questioning, intent is pretty clear.

        • Zetetic 1.2.1.1

          So you honestly think that that makes sense?

          You honestly think that the biggest tool at the PM’s disposal for creating jobs was to get himself (not some other NZer, himself) on to do four minutes of comedy on the number 2 late night TV show in the US. And you think that, after seeing the PM of NZ do dome bad jokes for a few minutes people would say ‘I want to go to that country’? And that would create enough new tourists to create lots of new jobs?

          Any evidence any of that happened?

          Doesn’t that sound like an enormously fucked up way of trying to create jobs?

        • Banter 1.2.1.2

          “Effectiveness of being on the Lettermen show is what you probably should be questioning, intent is pretty clear”

          And if Goff had done the same it would be as equally awesome…..

          • Frank Macskasy 1.2.1.2.1

            “And if Goff had done the same it would be as equally awesome…..”

            We’ll never know. I suspect Goff would have more common sense, or would have been coached better.

  2. gobsmacked 2

    How bad is this video? Let’s ask the PM’s office …

    1) Key kept quiet about it for nearly three years

    2) It was only finally released because they had no choice, under the OIA

    3) It was released on Friday afternoon – the classic “dump and hide”

    4) On YouTube, comments have been disabled

    So they knew what the public would think of it. They were right – check out the avalanche of embarrassment in the comments on Stuff …

    http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/politics/5398470/John-Keys-video-invite-to-Letterman

    Oh dear.

    • Colonial Viper 2.1

      I reckon someone should upload a version on YouTube which has comments activated. People here know how to download youtube videos right? (‘downloadhelper’ add on for Firefox will do it).

    • felix 2.2

      Comments seem to be on now.

  3. queenstfarmer 3

    Cheesy? Yes.

    Naff? Yeah.

    Getting significant publicity for NZ tourism at very low cost? Yes.

    Good on John for doing this.

    • millsy 3.1

      John Key can do no wrong in your eyes can he?

      Even though he is on track to drag down New Zealander’s living standards by 70-80% by:

      Holding down wages and conditions
      Allowing rents to skyrocket by destorying state housing
      selling our power companies and allowing prices to skyrocket

      Etc

      • queenstfarmer 3.1.1

        He can do a lot of things wrong – he’s a politician after all.

        For example if he did any of those things you allege, that would be wrong.

        • millsy 3.1.1.1

          ummmm he kinda is…

        • Colonial Viper 3.1.1.2

          Oh so disingenuous…I thought business people like you preferred a low wage labour market. That’s what you brought him in for, right?

        • bbfloyd 3.1.1.3

          so you havn’t listened to a word key has uttered in the last two years then? or heard that the nats are campaigning on selling state assets, which, strangely enough, include power companies.

          are you using the same source of information as the leader of the conservative party? (hat tip; whaleoil)

    • Colonial Viper 3.2

      Good on John for doing this.

      How matey matey blokey blokey 1st name basis, ol’ John-boy, good lad!

      PM makes himself look like an idiot and makes us look like a land of clowns

      Getting significant publicity for NZ tourism at very low cost? Yes.

      PS mate you’re from Queenstown how are those tourism numbers working out for NZ this year? Yeah, I thought so.

      • queenstfarmer 3.2.1

        How matey matey blokey blokey 1st name basis

        Gosh, on that basis I must best matey mates with Winston, Helen, Phil, Hone…

        Tourism is down globally, has been for a while now, which is why creative efforts to generate publicity for low costs should generally be encouraged.

        • Colonial Viper 3.2.1.1

          RESULTS please not lame excuses for lame comedy appearances.

          I’m pretty sure that Key’s effort drove people off NZ, according to the numbers.

        • Ianupnorth 3.2.1.2

          Tourism is down because the NZ$ is strong and the US$ is weak, hence middle class people suddenly find NZ expensive – and Kiwi’s find Europe more value for money!

          Now if he actually thought about sorting our economy (which he has buggered up!)

    • gobsmacked 3.3

      Getting significant publicity for NZ tourism at very low cost

      But that’s extremely easy to do.

      Key could fart into the microphone at the next APEC conference. He could greet Obama with a selection of show tunes from the ‘Black and White Ministrels.’ He could upstage the leaders’ photo by getting drunk and doing a strip tease. He could make a fool of himself in a hundred different ways. Such as … this video.

      It would all create publicity. But … publicity that makes New Zealand look good? Not really.

      Silvio Berlusconi is rarely out of the headlines these days, for his antics. Meanwhile, Italy is in the poo. Go figure.

    • Queenstfarmer – Key’s appearance on Letterman was cringeworthy.

      But then, Americans are used to entertainers becoming politicians – I guess Key tried to reverse that trend.

      Epic fail.

    • Banter 3.5

      i refer you to my comment above. Im sure you would be falling over yourself to congratulate Phil on a job well done. Or would it be as I suspect, a total embarrassment etc etc blah blah. pi$$ off

      • McFlock 3.5.1

        Because if there’s one thing the NZ left are known for, it’s a unified front of pouring obsequious praise on its leadership no matter how badly they perform?
        Question two: are you a complete fucking moron, or just lying out of desperation?

      • Colonial Viper 3.5.2

        Im sure you would be falling over yourself to congratulate Phil on a job well done.

        Main difference is that Prime Minister Goff would have been invited on to the show by Letterman.

  4. Had Letterman asked Key where he usually spends his main holiday? Hawaii would have been the reply.

  5. prism 5

    Radar is funnier. I’ll vote for Radar for PM – he’s very quick and astute.

  6. randal 6

    yeah well I know where they keep the ham!

  7. felix 7

    Love the way they titled it before release to pretend it’s not an audition tape.

    Also love the way Keys pauses in weird places when he’s reading, like he doesn’t really know which bits are meant to be funny.

    It’s like he’s reading in a language he doesn’t understand.

  8. felix 8

    Spud Bolger is the real winner out of all this.

    He finally looks like a statesman.

  9. millsy 9

    When I first saw this, I actually thought it was someone taking the piss…

    • willie maley 9.1

      millsy, someone sent it to me on FB, I did not watch it at first as i thought it was by that guy who makes piss take videos of Key.
      Was I in for a surprise! The guy has no appreciation for the office he holds in this country, what a bollox.

  10. Tel 10

    Well that is definitive proof that the Infinite monkey theorem is wrong, i.e. given enough time, a hypothetical MonKey typing at random would, as part of its output, almost surely produce all of Shakespeare’s plays. All this MonKey typed up was some humourless cue cards for a Chump to read out.

  11. SHG 11

    If it’s embarrassing videos you’re after, check out coverage of Parliament. Sepuloni, Robertson, and Mallard have taken cringeworthiness to a whole new level this week.

    • Mac1 11.1

      SHG, which one of these is our Prime Mincer touting himself around the fairground?

      • SHG 11.1.1

        Translation?

        • Mac1 11.1.1.1

          Which of these three MPs you mention has the responsibility to maintain the dignity and gravitas of the office of Prime Minister, rather than debase it by whoring himself around American entertainment shows or camping it up on catwalks?

          Get that? Because John Key doesn’t, either.

Important links

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

1 2 3 7

  • Housing Accord not working – prices continue skyward
      The Government's Auckland Housing Accord isn't working as house prices continue to go through the roof, Labour's Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “The average Auckland house has gone up by $110,000 since the Accord came into effect 15 months… ...
    6 hours ago
  • Justice for Teina Pora long overdue
    The Privy Council’s decision to quash Teina Pora’s convictions for the rape and murder of Susan Burdett could be the final chapter in a case that should have been closed years ago, Labour’s Justice Spokesperson Jacinda Ardern says. “Teina Pora… ...
    10 hours ago
  • Ministers must answer questions on IRD blowout
    The current and previous Revenue Ministers must front up and explain how the child support system had a budget blowout from $30 million to $210 million in just four years, says Labour’s Revenue spokesperson Clayton Cosgrove. “Peter Dunne was Revenue… ...
    1 day ago
  • Curb stratospheric public CEO salaries
    A review of the way MPs’ pay is set should also look at ways to curb excessive rises in the salaries of public service chief executives, Labour Leader Andrew Little says. “Some of these CEOs have had stratospheric pay increases… ...
    1 day ago
  • 50 cents? Makes no sense.
    The minimum wage rose by 50 cents this month from 14.25 to 14.75. While it’s a small step towards ensuring minimum workers get a fair share, it’s important to remember that real wages only rose 1.5% while productivity rose by… ...
    GreensBy Denise Roche MP
    2 days ago
  • The Serco corrections circus
    It should seem obvious to employers, private or public, that it’s important to do what you can to retain your best, most experienced staff. They make life easier for you because they’re effective, attentive and often respected by those around… ...
    GreensBy David Clendon MP
    2 days ago
  • Time for NZ to prohibit the killing of great apes
    That ban was widely hailed, and spurred efforts in other countries to get similar bans. However, apes are still being exploited, abused and killed, both in captivity and in the wild. Examples of cruelty, neglect and abuse abound. Apes are… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    5 days ago
  • Auckland building consents: Tragic
    The only word to describe the latest building consent figures for Auckland is ‘tragic’, Labour’s Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “Whatever the Government is doing to address the Auckland housing crisis, it is clearly not working. ...
    5 days ago
  • A whiff of a new biosecurity scandal?
    A pest which could create havoc for New Zealand’s horticulture and agriculture sector must be as much a focus for the Government as hunting out fruit flies, Labour’s Biosecurity spokesperson Damien O’Connor says. “While the Ministry for Primary Industries is… ...
    5 days ago
  • Government shrugs off health sector crisis
    Despite new evidence showing that cuts to health spending are costing lives the Government continues to deny the sector is struggling, Labour’s Health spokesperson Annette King says. “Health services in New Zealand are in crisis. ...
    6 days ago
  • Parata lowered the bar for failing charter school
    When Hekia Parata became aware that the Whangaruru charter school was experiencing major problems her first action was to drop standards by reducing the number of qualified teachers they had to employ, Labour’s Education spokesperson Chris Hipkins has revealed. “Hekia… ...
    6 days ago
  • National not being straight about the economy
    John Key and Bill English need to be straight with New Zealanders about the damage their failure to diversify the economy is doing, after new figures show export growth plunged due to a collapse in dairy exports, says Grant Robertson.… ...
    6 days ago
  • Mind the Gap
    This week the International Monetary Fund released a report on the wider economic value in closing the gender pay gap. When even the bastions of free-market economics start to raise concerns about gender pay gaps, we have to realise how… ...
    GreensBy Jan Logie MP
    6 days ago
  • Labour will hold National to parental leave promise
    Labour will hold National to its promise to increase the support given to new parents of premature, multiple birth and babies born with disabilities, Labour’s paid parental leave campaigner Sue Moroney says. "I am naturally disappointed that after battling for… ...
    1 week ago
  • It was all just pillar talk
    Steven Joyce’s confession that he can no longer guarantee a pillar-free design for the New Zealand International Convention Centre shows the Government has abandoned its dream of creating an ‘iconic’ ‘world-class’ structure, says Labour Economic Development spokesperson David Clark. “Steven… ...
    1 week ago
  • Australians move on offshore speculators
    John Key might want to have a quiet word with Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott about Canberra's just-announced crack down on offshore speculators when he visits New Zealand this week, Labour's Housing spokesperson Phil Twyford says."Tony Abbott's centre right government… ...
    1 week ago
  • Government at odds on overseas driver crashes
    National backbencher Jacqui Dean has spoken out about overseas driver crashes, putting herself at odds with Prime Minister John Key who is on record as saying it’s not a big issue, Labour’s Transport spokesperson Phil Twyford says. “I’m not surprised… ...
    1 week ago
  • Human Rights and the Palestine Crisis
    Last week I heard two Palestinians speak at Wellington events about the ongoing crisis in their country. Samar Sabawi spoke to a full house about the history of Palestine and gave us a lucid and disturbing account of the situation… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    1 week ago
  • Time to take real care of our kids
    An Amnesty International report has once again criticised New Zealand’s track record on looking after our kids, Labour’s Children’s spokesperson Jacinda Ardern says. The annual report, which looks at global human rights abuses highlights not only the fact that high… ...
    1 week ago
  • John Key wrong about Labour’s war vote
    John Key’s desperate claims that the former Labour Government didn’t put combat troop deployment to a Parliamentary vote are simply wrong, Labour’s Defence spokesperson Phil Goff says. “It was disgraceful that the Prime Minister ran rough shod over democracy and… ...
    1 week ago
  • Manus Island and the New Zealand Government
    This week the Greens have participated in awareness activity about Manus Island, the refugee camp on an island in Papua New Guinea where Australia dumps asylum seekers. John Key says that he has every confidence in the Australian Government’s claim… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Election Inquiry – Getting accessible voting on the agenda
    James Shaw has been doing a series of blogs on the Election Inquiry into last year’s general election.  I thought this was a great opportunity to raise an issue very dear to me – accessible voting. Last year’s general election… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    2 weeks ago
  • RMA changes no solution to Christchurch housing
    Housing will continue to be a big issue in 2015. The latest Consumer Price Index, released last month, shows both good news and bad news on the housing front. After years of being the most expensive place to build a… ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Saving kokako in South Auckland’s Hunua Ranges
    It is amazing that you can hear the song of the endangered North Island kokako in South Auckland’s Hunua Ranges, less than 50 kms from the central city. A heavy schedule of policy workshops at the Green Party’s Policy… ...
    GreensBy Eugenie Sage MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Let’s not turn a blind eye to human rights
    The Cricket World Cup has just opened in New Zealand, and it’s an opportunity for us to shine on the world stage. International sport can be a chance for us to build relationships with other countries, and examine what it… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    2 weeks ago
  • Its Just Not Cricket
    This week it was my privilege to work with Sri Lankan Tamil communities in this country and host Australian journalist and human rights advocate Trevor Grant. I knew a bit about Trevor from his biography but I didn’t know just… ...
    GreensBy Catherine Delahunty MP
    3 weeks ago
  • Time for NZ to #BeCrueltyFree
    The Government is about to progress the final stages of the Animal Welfare Amendment bill. This will be our last opportunity to get changes made to improve the bill to ensure a better outcome for animals. I have put forwards… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    3 weeks ago
  • We want access!
    Access to buildings is a big issue for many New Zealanders. It looks like that, due to the hard work and persistence of people in the disability community, the Government may finally be starting to take access to buildings seriously.… ...
    GreensBy Mojo Mathers MP
    3 weeks ago
  • Greens call on Super Fund to divest from fossil fuels
    The Green Party today called on the New Zealand Superannuation Fund (the Fund) to divest from fossil fuels, starting immediately with coal. The call was accompanied with a new report, Making money from a climate catastrophe: The case for divesting… ...
    GreensBy Russel Norman MP
    3 weeks ago

Removed at the request of The Daily Blog.
Public service advertisements by The Standard

Current CO2 level in the atmosphere