Caption competition
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- Date published:
4:09 pm, March 23rd, 2015 - 68 comments
Categories: caption contest -
Tags: cows, milking
Via a bemused Lyndon Hood:
68 comments on “Caption competition ”
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- Appointment of Judges of the Court Martial Appeal CourtAttorney-General David Parker today announced the appointment of Colonel Craig Ruane, Commander Robyn Loversidge, and James Wilding KC as Judges of the Court Martial Appeal Court. The Court Martial Appeal Court is a senior court of record established under the Court Martial Appeals Act 1953. It is summoned by the ...1 day ago
- Government strengthens measures to combat migrant worker exploitationOffence and penalty regime significantly strengthened New infringement offences for non-compliance Public register of individuals and businesses that are found guilty of migrant exploitation New community-led pilot to educate migrants workers and employers of employment rights Implemented reporting tools successfully brings exploitation out of the shadows Take-up of protective visa ...2 days ago
- Livestock exports by sea to ceaseThe passing of a Bill today to end the export of livestock by sea will protect New Zealandâs reputation for world-leading animal welfare standards, Minister of Agriculture Damien OâConnor said. âThe Animal Welfare Amendment Bill future-proofs our economic security amid increasing consumer scrutiny across the board on production practices," Damien ...2 days ago
- Extra measures to increase census turnout in 20233500 census workers on the ground, twice as many as last census More forms to be delivered â 44% compared to 3% in 2018 Prioritisation of MÄori and other groups and regions with lower response rates in 2018 Major work to ensure the delivery of a successful census in 2023 ...2 days ago
- Shining the light on screen workersImproved working conditions for workers in the screen industry is now a reality with the Screen Industry Workers Bill passing its third reading today, announced Workplace Relations and Safety Minister Michael Wood. âItâs fantastic to see the Screen Industry Workers Bill progress through Parliament. The new Act will strengthen protections ...2 days ago
- Mental health resources for young people and schools launchedAssociate Minister of Education (School Operations) Jan Tinetti and Associate Minister of Education (MÄori Education) Kelvin Davis have today launched two new resources to support wellbeing, and the teaching and learning of mental health education in schools and kura. âStudents who are happy and healthy learn better. These resources ...2 days ago
- Progress continues on future-proofing Aucklandâs transport infrastructureTransport Minister Michael Wood has welcomed the latest progress on Aucklandâs two most transformational transport projects in a generation â Auckland Light Rail and the Additional WaitematÄ Harbour Connections. Auckland Light Rail and Waka Kotahi NZ Transport Agency have named preferred bidders to move each project to their next phase, ...2 days ago
- Government supports local innovation in homelessness preventionTen successful applicants in round two of the Local Innovation and Partnership Fund (LIPF) Close to $6 million allocated as part of the Homelessness Action Plan (HAP) MÄori, Pasefika and rangatahi a strong focus Round three opening later this year with up to $6.8 million available. Government is stepping up ...2 days ago
- More medicines for New Zealanders, thanks to Govtâs Budget boostHealth Minister Andrew Little is welcoming news that two more important medicines are set to be funded, thanks to the Governmentâs big boost to the countryâs medicines budget. âSince coming into Government in 2017, the Labour Government has increased Pharmacâs funding by 43 per cent, including a $71 million boost ...3 days ago
- Government delivers ACC change to support 28,000 parentsThe Maternal Birth Injury and Other Matters Bill passes Third Reading â the first amendment to ACC legislation of its kind From 1 October 2022, new ACC cover to benefit approximately 28,000 birthing parents Additional maternal birth injuries added alongside new review provision to ensure cover remains comprehensive Greater clarity ...3 days ago
- Further cuts for East Coast tarakihi limits to rebuild numbers fasterCommercial catch limits for East Coast tarakihi will be reduced further to help the stock rebuild faster. âTarakihi is a popular fish, and this has led to declining levels over time. Many adjustments have been made and the stock is recovering. I have decided on further commercial catch reductions of ...3 days ago
- New Ambassador to Colombia announcedForeign Minister Nanaia Mahuta today announced the appointment of diplomat Nicci Stilwell as the next Ambassador to Colombia. âAotearoa New Zealandâs relationship with Colombia is fast growing with strong links across education, climate change and indigenous co-operation,â Nanaia Mahuta said. âTrade is a key part of our relationship with Colombia, ...3 days ago
- 3000 more RSE workers to ease workforce pressuresThe Government continues to respond to global workforce shortages by announcing the largest increase in over a decade to the Recognised Seasonal Employer Scheme (RSE), providing 3000 additional places, Immigration Minister Michael Wood and Agriculture Minister Damien OâConnor have announced. The new RSE cap will allow access to 19,000 workers ...3 days ago
- Sanctions on more of the Russian political eliteFurther sanctions are being imposed on members of President Putinâs inner circle and other representatives of the Russian political elite, as part of the Governments ongoing response to the war in Ukraine, says Foreign Minister Nanaia Mahuta. âUkraine has been clear that the most important action we can take to ...3 days ago
- New Principal Youth Court Judge appointedJudge Ida Malosi, District Court Judge of Wellington, has been appointed as the new Principal Youth Court Judge, Attorney-General David Parker announced today. Born and raised in Southland, Judge Malosi graduated from Victoria University of Wellington and spent her legal career in South Auckland. She was a founding partner of ...3 days ago
- Visitor arrivals highest since pandemic beganOverseas visitor arrivals exceeded 100,000 in July, for the first time since the borders closed in March 2020 Strong ski season lifts arrivals to Queenstown to at least 90% of the same period in 2019 Australia holiday recovery has continued to trend upwards New Zealandâs tourism recovery is on its ...3 days ago
- Language provides hope for TuvaluClimate change continues to present a major risk for the island nation of Tuvalu, which means sustaining te gana Tuvalu, both on home soil and in New Zealand Aotearoa, has never been more important, Minister for Pacific Peoples Aupito William Sio said. The Tuvalu Auckland Community Trust and wider Tuvalu ...5 days ago
- Minister Sio to attend Asian Development Bank meeting in ManilaAssociate Foreign Affairs Minister Aupito William Sio travels to the Philippines this weekend to represent Aotearoa New Zealand at the 55th Annual Meeting of the Asian Development Bank (ADB) Board of Governors in Manila. âThe ADB Annual Meeting provides an opportunity to engage with other ADB member countries, including those ...6 days ago
- United Nations General Assembly National StatementE ngÄ Mana, e ngÄ Reo, Rau Rangatira mÄ kua huihui mai nei i tÄnei Whare Nui o te Ao NgÄ mihi maioha ki a koutou katoa, mai i tĆku Whenua o Aotearoa Tuia ki runga, Tuia ki raro, ka Rongo to pĆ ka rongo te ao NĆ reira, tÄnÄ ...7 days ago
- New strategy unifies all-of-Government approach to help Pacific languages thriveA united approach across all-of-Government underpins the new Pacific Language Strategy, announced by the Minister for Pacific Peoples Aupito William Sio at Parliament today. âThe cornerstone of our Pacific cultures, identities and place in Aotearoa, New Zealand are our Pacific languages. They are at the heart of our wellbeing,â Aupito ...1 week ago
- Upgrades for sporting facilities ahead of FIFA Womenâs World CupCommunities across the country will benefit from newly upgraded sporting facilities as a result of New Zealand co-hosting the FIFA Womenâs World Cup 2023. The Government is investing around $19 million to support upgrades at 30 of the 32 potential sporting facilities earmarked for the tournament, including pitch, lighting and ...1 week ago
- Partnership supports climate action in Latin America and CaribbeanAotearoa New Zealand is extending the reach of its support for climate action to a new agriculture initiative with partners in Latin America and the Caribbean. Foreign Affairs Minister Nanaia Mahuta and Agriculture Minister Damien OâConnor announced a NZ$10 million contribution to build resilience, enhance food security and address the ...1 week ago
- Landmark agreement for MÄori fisheries celebrates 30th yearThe 30th anniversary of the Fisheries Deed of Settlement is a time to celebrate a truly historic partnership that has helped transform communities, says Parliamentary Under-Secretary to the Minister for Oceans and Fisheries Rino Tirikatene. âThe agreement between the Crown and MÄori righted past wrongs, delivered on the Crownâs treaty ...1 week ago
- Government backs initiatives to cut environmental impact of plastic wasteThe Government has today announced funding for projects that will cut plastic waste and reduce its impact on the environment. âToday I am announcing the first four investments to be made from the $50 million Plastics Innovation Fund, which was set last year and implemented a 2020 election promise,â Environment ...1 week ago
- Call for expressions of interest in appointment to the High Court BenchAttorney-General David Parker today called for nominations and expressions of interest in appointment to the High Court Bench. This is a process conducted at least every three years and ensures the Attorney-General has up to date information from which to make High Court appointments. âIt is important that when appointments ...1 week ago
- Depositor compensation scheme protects Kiwisâ moneyNew Zealanders will have up to $100,000 of their deposits in any eligible institution guaranteed in the event that institution fails, under legislation introduced in Parliament today. The Deposit Takers Bill is the third piece of legislation in a comprehensive review of the Reserve Bank of New Zealand Act and ...1 week ago
- New fund to help more Pacific aiga into their own homesThe Government has launched a new housing fund that will help more Pacific aiga achieve the dream of home ownership. âThe Pacific Building Affordable Homes Fund will help organisations, private developers, MÄori/iwi, and NGOs build affordable housing for Pacific families and establish better pathways to home ownership within Pacific communities. ...1 week ago
- More than 100,000 new Kiwis as halfway point reachedOver 100,000 new Kiwis can now call New Zealand âhomeâ after the 2021 Resident Visa reached the halfway point of approvals, Minister of Immigration Michael Wood announced today. âThis is another important milestone, highlighting the positive impact our responsive and streamlined immigration system is having by providing comfort to migrant ...1 week ago
- Maniapoto Claims Settlement Bill passes third reading – He mea pÄhi te Maniapoto Claims Settl...NÄ te Minita mĆ ngÄ Take Tiriti o Waitangi, nÄ Andrew Little, te iwi o Maniapoto i rÄhiri i tÄnei rÄ ki te mÄtakitaki i te pÄnuitanga tuatoru o te Maniapoto Claims Settlement Bill - te pikinga whakamutunga o tÄ rÄtou whakataunga Tiriti o Waitangi o mua. "Me mihi ka ...1 week ago
- 50,000 more kids to benefit from equity-based programmes next yearAnother 47,000 students will be able to access additional support through the school donations scheme, and a further 3,000 kids will be able to get free and healthy school lunches as a result of the Equity Index. Thatâs on top of nearly 90% of schools that will also see a ...1 week ago
- Healthy Active Learning now in 40 percent of schools across New ZealandA total of 800 schools and kura nationwide are now benefitting from a physical activity and nutrition initiative aimed at improving the wellbeing of children and young people. Healthy Active Learning was funded for the first time in the inaugural Wellbeing Budget and was launched in 2020. It gets regional ...1 week ago
- Speech at 10th meeting of the Friends of the Comprehensive Nuclear-Test Ban TreatyKia Ora. It is a pleasure to join you here today at this 10th meeting of the Friends of the Comprehensive Nuclear-Test Ban Treaty. This gathering provides an important opportunity to reiterate our unwavering commitment to achieving a world without nuclear weapons, for which the entry into force of this ...1 week ago
- Speech for Earthshot Prize Innovation Summit 2022Kia ora koutou katoa Thank you for the invitation to join you. Itâs a real pleasure to be here, and to be in such fine company. I want to begin today by acknowledging His Royal Highness The Prince of Wales and Sir David Attenborough in creating what is becoming akin ...1 week ago
- Eight Sisters will be chuffed after landing a chunk of the lolly as Govt finds innovative and arty w...
Buzz from the Beehive The applicants who applied for public funds under the name Eight Sisters have done nicely, thank you, from a trough called the Innovation Fund. They will receive $659,520 to develop a project called Wharenui Harikoa, described as âa large scale crocheted Wharenui to transform intergenerational trauma ...2 hours ago - So long, Loy Yang: shutting Australiaâs dirtiest coal plant a decade early wonât jeopardise our ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tim Nelson, Associate Professor of Economics, Griffith University Shutterstock AGL Energy â Australiaâs largest emitter of greenhouse gases â announced this week it will shut the Loy Yang A power station in Victoriaâs LaTrobe Valley in 2035, a decade earlier ...2 hours ago - A sham sentence after a secret trial for Aung San Suu Kyiâs Australian economic adviserSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tim Harcourt, Industry Professor and Chief Economist, University of Technology Sydney The Irawaddy, CC BY-SA Australian Sean Turnell, economic adviser to Myanmarâs democratically elected leader Aung San Suu Kyi, has been in prison since the military coup of February 2021, ...2 hours ago
- US Democratsâ gains stall six weeks before midterm elections; UK Labour seizes huge lead after bud...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Adrian Beaumont, Election Analyst (Psephologist) at The Conversation; and Honorary Associate, School of Mathematics and Statistics, The University of Melbourne The United States midterm elections will be held in six weeks, on November 8. All 435 House of Representatives seats are up ...3 hours ago
- View from The Hill: national cabinet drops mandatory isolation, dumping âCOVID exceptionalismâSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra National cabinet has agreed to lift the five day mandatory isolation period for people contracting COVID, with the Commonwealthâs chief medical officer declaring âit is time to move away from COVID exceptionalismâ. In a ...3 hours ago
- The queenâs death certificate says she died of âold ageâ. But what does that really mean?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Marc Trabsky, Senior research fellow, La Trobe University Queen Elizabethâs newly released death certificate contains just two curious words under her cause of death â old age. We might talk about people dying of old age in everyday speech. But who actually ...3 hours ago
- Optus says it needed to keep identity data for six years. But did it really?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Brendan Walker-Munro, Senior Research Fellow, The University of Queensland Among the many questions raised by the Optus data leak â cybersecurity experts are confident it wasnât a hack, but that may have to be decided by a court â is why the company ...3 hours ago
- Amazon Web Services had direct contact with Jacinda Ardern, OIA shows
A giant US tech firm that is among a slew of companies building data centres here, corresponded directly with Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern. ...3 hours ago - Not just a joke: we scoured TikTok for anti-Asian humour during the pandemic, and found too many dis...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Ariadna Matamoros-FernĂĄndez, Senior Lecturer in Digital Media at the School of Communication, Queensland University of Technology Viviana Rishe/Unsplash We live in deeply unequal societies where certain groups, such as racial and sexual minorities, continue to experience structural oppression. Humour targeted ...4 hours ago
- More than 500,000 mental health sessions delivered by government programmeMore than half a million mental health sessions have been delivered to New Zealanders under the government's Access and Choice programme despite delays to the roll-out. ...5 hours ago
- âA long way to goâ: Catholic women call for wide-ranging church reforms in new international sur...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Kathleen McPhillips, Senior Lecturer, School of Humanities and Social Science, University of Newcastle Catholic women across the world are calling for a wide range of reforms to the church, according to the results of our survey of more than 17,000 Catholic women ...5 hours ago
- Greyhound Trainer Attempts To Thwart Drug Test
Another greyhound has tested positive for methamphetamine in the racing industry. The drug was detected in June 2022 in Palmerston North only after the trainer used a string of excuses to delay the urine swab by two hours. SAFE Campaigns Manager ...5 hours ago - Made in 1972, the documentary Ningla-AâNa is a powerful look at establishment of the Aboriginal Te...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Bronwyn Carlson, Professor, Indigenous Studies and Director of The Centre for Global Indigenous Futures, Macquarie University Moratorium for Black rights Sydney from the film NINGLA ANA This year, we acknowledge the 50th anniversary of the establishment of the Aboriginal Tent ...6 hours ago
- Week in Politics: Another poll points to a 'drag race' electionAnalysis - Another opinion poll points to a close election, as National launches a tax attack on the government but has to answer questions about its own policy, writes Peter Wilson. ...7 hours ago
- World Vegetarian Month 2022October is World Vegetarian Month, starting with World Vegetarian Day on 1st October, encompassing World Animal Day on October 4th and ending with World Vegan Day on 1st November. â This month is a good opportunity to promote healthy living, sustainability ...7 hours ago
- Media focus on Davisâ advice against looking through a âvanilla lensâ while Chhourâs questio...It is tempting to liken the political hacks of the mainstream news media to piranha, rather than ever-vigilant watchdogs of the Fourth Estate. With the exception of the NZ Herald, they have lamentably ill-served the voting public by failing to muster a whimper, let alone a snarl or a warning ...7 hours ago
- Viral infections including COVID are among the important causes of dementia â one more reason to c...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By John Donne Potter, Professor, Research Centre for Hauora and Health, Massey University Sven Hoppe/picture alliance via Getty Images With more of us living into old age than at any other time, dementia is increasing steadily worldwide, with major individual, family, ...8 hours ago
- Justice For Pike River One Step CloserThe decision by the New Zealand Police to look further into the Pike River mine workings has been welcomed by Pike River family members. Ten new boreholes will be drilled into the mine to allow police to gather more evidence by remote video. For ...9 hours ago
- Racism Disproportionally Affects Visibly Indigenous And Ethnic Minority YouthMÄori and ethnic minority youth who are not perceived as European/PÄkehÄ or âwhiteâ are more likely to experience racial discrimination Lancet study shows Young people who are not perceived as European/PÄkehÄ or âwhiteâ are more likely to experience ...10 hours ago
- Analytical Note Takes A Broader View Of New Zealandâs Productivity PerformanceThe Treasury has published a new Analytical Note, New Zealand's Productivity Performance: Taking a Broader View , written by John Janssen, Margaret Galt and Giles Bollinger. This Analytical Note expands on themes covered in the Secretary to the Treasuryâs ...10 hours ago
- Shortage Of Accessible Homes A Human Rights DeficitHuman rights data on housing released today by Te KÄhui Tika Tangata, the Human Rights Commission, estimates more than 100,000 people face severe housing deprivation, while 17 percent of people with a physical impairment have unmet housing modification ...11 hours ago
- Political panel: Poll position, media merger, and an apologyMorning Report - RNZ and TVNZ's political editors Jane Patterson and Jessica Mutch-McKay assess some clashes between opposition MPs and the government - and the implications in the latest poll. ...11 hours ago
- Eliud Kipchoge broke the menâs marathon record by 30 seconds. How close is the official sub-2 hour...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Simon D Angus, Associate Professor, Department of Economics, Monash University Eliud Kipchoge crosses the line to win the Berlin Marathon on September 25, 2022. Christoph Soeder/AP Sixty-nine seconds. In that time, you could reheat a cuppa in the microwave or get halfway ...11 hours ago
- Why has my cold dragged on so long? And how do I know when itâs morphed into something more seriou...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By David King, Senior Lecturer in General Practice, The University of Queensland Photo by Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels, CC BY Common colds are caused by viruses. There are no effective cures, and antibiotics do not work on viruses, so treatment is targeted at ...11 hours ago
- Shifting ocean currents are pushing more and more heat into the Southern Hemisphereâs cooler water...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Moninya Roughan, Professor in Oceanography, UNSW Sydney Shutterstock The oceans absorb more than 90% of all extra heat trapped by the emissions weâve produced by burning fossil fuels. This heat is enormous. Itâs as if we exploded an atom bomb ...11 hours ago
- Letâs show a bit of love for the lillipilly. This humble plant forms the worldâs largest genus o...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Darren Crayn, Professor and Director, Australian Tropical Herbarium, James Cook University Shutterstock Youâre probably familiar with the sight of a lillipilly bush. This hardy Australian staple â a glossy evergreen bearing powder-puff flowers and clusters of bright berries â ...11 hours ago
- Local body elections: Undelivered voting papers will deter some – officialDozens of people are complaining daily they haven't got their voting papers for the local elections, an electoral official says. ...14 hours ago
- Grattan on Friday: National Anti-Corruption Commission set for easy birth thanks to Albanese-Dutton ...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra Though theyâd be the last to admit it, Anthony Albanese and Peter Dutton have more in common than you might expect. Theyâre both unapologetic pragmatists. Albanese, a left fighter in the distant past, is ...21 hours ago
- Iâve given out my Medicare number. How worried should I be about the latest Optus data breach?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Bruce Baer Arnold, Associate Professor, School of Law, University of Canberra Medicare card numbers are the latest personal details to be exposed as part of the Optus data breach. Optus has confirmed this affects 14,900 valid Medicare numbers that have not expired, ...1 day ago
- Should ADHD be in the NDIS? Yes, but eligibility for disability supports should depend on the person...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Andrew Whitehouse, Bennett Chair of Autism, Telethon Kids Institute, The University of Western Australia Shutterstock Eligibility for the National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS) came under scrutiny this week, after NDIS minister Bill Shorten said he was considering whether a diagnosis ...1 day ago
- Government introduces Worker Protection (Migrant and Other Employees) BillA crackdown on migrant exploitation could see guilty employers face harsher penalties - be publicly named and shamed - and banned from managing a company. ...1 day ago
- How did Victoria cut emissions by almost 30% â while still running mostly on coal?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tony Wood, Program Director, Energy, Grattan Institute In the 15 years to 2020, Victoriaâs emissions fell by almost 30%, according to a new government report. You might wonder how is this possible, given most of the stateâs brown coal stations are still ...1 day ago
- Broadcasting minister clears up comments on no trust in NZ television and radioBroadcasting Minister Willie Jackson has clarified comments he made about the media, saying he did not mean to imply the public did not trust RNZ and TVNZ. ...1 day ago
- Bryce Edwardsâ Political Roundup:Â Public sector bosses must be held accountable for undermining t...Analysis by Dr Bryce Edwards. Political Roundup:Â Public sector bosses must be held accountable for undermining transparency Political scientist, Dr Bryce Edwards. Public service bosses earn mega-salaries, yet oversee bureaucracies that frequently undermine transparency and frustrate public and media scrutiny. The obvious answer is to start docking the pay of chief ...1 day ago
- These 12 things can reduce your dementia risk â but many Australians donât know them allSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Joyce Siette, Research Theme Fellow, Western Sydney University Shutterstock Dementia is a leading cause of death in Australia. Although dementia mainly affects older people, it is an avoidable part of ageing. In fact, we all have the power to reduce ...1 day ago
- Have Your Say On The Charities Amendment Bill...1 day ago
- Politics with Michelle Grattan: Attorney-General Mark Dreyfus on the National Anti-Corruption Commis...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra The government has introduced its legislation for the National Anti-Corruption Commission, which has received the endorsement of opposition leader Peter Dutton and so is assured of passage through parliament. But critics are unhappy that ...1 day ago
- Another record payout for Tatuaâs 101 farmer-shareholders
It is only a star on the horizon for the bulk of dairy farmers — but this is what they may aspire to.  How about a payout of $11.30kg/MS? That’s what the 101 farmer-shareholders in the Waikato  specialist-product-co-op  Tatua will receive — a record — for the 2021-22 year. Tatua ...1 day ago - Govt (through the PGF) poured $3.79m into a wine research centre but it has torpodoed the businesses...Buzz from the Beehive While the PM was pumping up the prospects of wine producers – and, presumably, their potential for export growth â Trade Minister Damien OâConnor was scuttling shipments of livestock by sea. Jacinda Ardern has officially opened the New Zealand Wine Centre in Blenheim, saying investments like ...1 day ago
- Heavy mercury contamination at Maya sites reveals a deep historic legacySource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Duncan Cook, Associate professor, Australian Catholic University Shutterstock Mercury is a toxic heavy metal. When leached into the natural environment, it accumulates and builds up through food chains, ultimately threatening human health and ecosystems. In the last century, human ...1 day ago
- 80kp/h Speed Limit Unlikely To Significantly Reduce Serious AccidentsA proposal to dramatically lower the speed limit on most of the nation's highways is unlikely to significantly lower the road toll, says the car review website dogandlemon.com . Editor Clive Matthew-Wilson, who is an outspoken road safety campaigner. says: ...1 day ago
- 30 Year Journey To SettlementTe WhakatĆhea, will soon be voting on whether to receive a $100m+ settlement package 26 years after receiving their first settlement offer from the Crown. WhakatĆhea Pre Settlement Claims Trust Chair, Graeme Riesterer says that the time is now for ...1 day ago
- Ports Of Auckland Must Not Be PrivatizedThe Maritime Union of New Zealand says the Ports of Auckland must remain in the full ownership of Auckland Council. Maritime Union of New Zealand National Secretary Craig Harrison says recent debates in the Auckland Mayoralty election campaign had ...1 day ago
- NZ King Salmon Mortality Rates Are Ethically And Legally ContentiousNew Zealand King Salmon (NZKS) has reported a $24.5 million loss for its half-year earnings, of which it says a major contributor was a January mortality event. A 25% mortality rate for NZKS farms is considered standard for the company, and NZKS is ...1 day ago
- Minister Davis apologises over comments to ACT's Karen ChhourMinister for Children Kelvin Davis has phoned ACT MP Karen Chhour directly to apologise over comments made in Parliament yesterday. ...1 day ago
- Why keeping tabs on Tata suggests OâConnor should be quickening the pace in push for an FTA with I...Among the many issues related to the performance of the export sector and how the Government might further help it is the case for negotiating a trade deal with India. Australia has secured a free trade deal with what is the planetâs fifth-biggest economy. In contrast, Agriculture and Trade Minister ...1 day ago
- Pay Equity Claims Formally DeliveredTe Hautƫ Kahurangi | Tertiary Education Union members have formally delivered gender pay equity claims to university employers across Aotearoa today. The multi-union and multi-employer claims are being jointly raised by TEU, PSA and TIASA and target ...1 day ago
- Chloe Swarbrick confident alcohol harm reduction bill will find first-reading supportGreen MP Chlöe Swarbrick will need most of Labour's MP to swing behind her bill if it is to pass its first hurdle in Parliament. ...1 day ago
- Change To Fisheries Amendment Bill A Win For The EnvironmentThe Governmentâs decision to drop controversial changes to fisheries legislation is welcome news to fishing and environmental groups concerned about threats to fish sustainability. Oceans and Fisheries Minister David Parker has announced he will ...1 day ago
- Thomas Cranmer: Three Waters, Taumata Arowai and the scantly diluted powers of Minister Mahutaâs ...
New Zealandâs new water services regulator is Taumata Arowai. Its website says this name was âgiftedâ to it (or bestowed on it?) by Nanaia Mahuta, Minister of Local Government. Taumata Arowai was formed with local government support but its role in the Three Waters reforms is more controversial. Moreover, it ...1 day ago - Broadcasting Minister Willie Jackson cites 'no trust' in defence of public media entityBroadcasting Minister Willie Jackson is defending the mega public media merger between RNZ and TVNZ, saying it is needed because the public does not trust the media. ...1 day ago
- Force Justified To Prevent Manâs Escape In InglewoodThe Independent Police Conduct Authority has found that Police were justified in using a range of tactics, including Tasers, to arrest a man who was trying to escape in Inglewood on 21 May 2020. The man complained to the Authority about the level ...1 day ago
- Te PÄti MÄori Urging WhÄnau To Get Out And Vote, As List Of Endorsed Candidates ConfirmedTe PÄti MÄori is today urging that whÄnau across Aotearoa get out and vote in this yearâs local elections as it confirms itâs list of endorsed candidates. âWith just over a week to go before the ballot boxes close for local elections, ...1 day ago
- Smartphone Addiction Debated Live Before Phone Free DayIn the lead-up to Phone Free Day 2022 (6 October) weâre discussing what is healthy use of your smartphone in our complex, busy lives. Will our young people have shorter attention spans? Is driver distraction from cellphones causing accidents? Is social ...1 day ago
- Greenwashed Dairy Cows On Parliament Lawn Highlight Government Inaction On Climate29 Sept: Greenpeace Aotearoa has brought a mock dairy herd to Parliamentâs lawn to highlight the governmentâs use of greenwashing instead of real action on New Zealandâs biggest climate polluter: intensive dairy. Actors representing Prime ...1 day ago
- Dunne Speaks: Youth Crisis LoomingNow that New Zealand has started to move on from the unrelenting emphasis of the last two and a half years on dealing with the pandemic, focus is beginning to return to other important aspects of national life. We are all familiar with the mounting ...1 day ago
- Passing Of Live Export Bill A Historic MomentThe Animal Welfare Amendment Bill passed its third reading last night, which will give effect to a ban on live export. All exports of cattle, deer, goats, and sheep by sea will stop on 30 April 2022 SAFE Chief Executive Debra Ashton said itâs a ...1 day ago
- Tragedies And Funerals Like A Honeypot To ScammersCriminals and scammers are ambushing well-meaning people during times of tragedy, so it is important to be on the lookout, a cybersecurity expert warns. Author of the book 'She'll Be Right (Not!) â a cybersecurity guide for Kiwi business owners ...1 day ago
- From fertiliser to phantom: DNA cracks a century-old mystery about New Zealandâs only extinct fres...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Lachie Scarsbrook, DPhil Student, University of Oxford The upokororo, or New Zealand grayling (_Prototroctes oxyrhynchus_) Te Papa CC BYNC-ND 4.0, Author provided In 1923, Te Rangi HÄ«roa (Sir Peter Buck) documented the last confirmed capture of a special fish â the upokororo ...1 day ago
- Have Your Say On The Fire And Emergency New Zealand (Levy) Amendment BillThis bill would make changes to the Fire and Emergency New Zealand Act 2017. It aims to simplify the implementation of the insurance-based levy framework for Fire and Emergency New Zealand. The levy is insurance based, which means that insurance ...1 day ago
- Glass beads in lunar soil reveal ancient asteroid bombardments on the Moon and EarthSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Alexander Nemchin, Professor, Applied Geology, Curtin University NASA / JSC In 2020, Chinaâs Chang’e 5 mission sampled more than a kilogram of Moon rock and soil and brought it back to Earth. The samples contain countless tiny beads of glass, ...1 day ago
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I might not be able to hammer a nail, but I’ve spent 30 years milking a teat for all it’s worth.
Sorry no caption, just a question: is this a real photo? Head doesn’t fit.
Perhaps a fish-eye lens enlarging Key’s head. It looks distorted in other areas: curves on what look like straight edges etc.
apparently it is real but it screams wrong in all sorts of ways – lighting, scale, neck/spine alignment but then again – he never did prove he wasn’t a reptilian đ
God I wish there was video of this. Having seen him flouncing around with a hammer, there’s no way he would be capable of milking a cow without making a right fuckwit of himself.
The footage of Key with Sth Korean PM tonight on 3News looks like the source for that inane smug grin .. shaking hands across the table with their PM … pretty sure it’s the source, and a real fun someone did the rest today !
just an udder mudderf.cker
John Key is looking for Mike Sabin. Has anyone seen Mike?
‘Pull the udder one’
oh dear,
(facepalm…. why did i look at this !)
why?
Milking’s okay, but I’m more one for top-quality bullshit.
I’m normally up to my neck with crap.
No wonder he’s smiling – not even ankle deep, and he gets to second base…
These are Not Orivida cows.
Really , no lies đ
“Her name’s Judith, and boy does she love it when I squeeze her teats.”
“Look at me, look at me! In just six short years, I have tuned Nuslund into a lovely land of milk and bullshit!”
If I get my way this effluent will be going straight into our rivers!
Now lick the s**t off my boots NZ!
” Stand aside Nathan. Photo op”
What an udder disgrace we having been pulling Northlanders tits for over 70 years and now thanks to Peters we are serving up pork to these ungrateful country hicks.
So, the cows have all come home………………..
I’m quite good at this, actually – I’ve been milking the system for years!
I milked the system of money so i wouldnt have to do this for a living
Everytime I visit Paulas i have to do the washing up!
CEO Keys should have worn his glasses as he tries to persuade swing voters in Northland…
Ha! Who said I couldn’t change a lightbulb!
In the auditions for All Creatures Great and Small Deux, Keys fails abysmally on the grounds of never being great creature and not accepting his small penis syndrome….
Generilisimo Keys buries the hatchet with Pete The Ego George with a handshake, no hard feelings…
I knew becoming involved in Dirty Politics would come in handy one day..hurrah!
The cows complained on mass, we have feelings you know,,,,,,
Which of you two human scum let rip?
Its totally disgusting!
What u don’t know, is I cant get ma hand out arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!
National’s ECAN appointees show their commitment to water quality
Farmer: “HmmmâŠâŠ..should I tell him it’s a bull??”
Keys defies critics who said he was up to his neck in shit, look only up to my feet!
Ha!
Feel My Power!
Keys smirks through adversity as he looks for his lost golf club
One week pictured with pigs, this week cows, whats next week?
Well the worst PM…………………….. your own MP’s
I hope this cow does not shit on me like I have shit on New Zealand
Now cow, now!.
Oooh orivida, orrivida! (Dribble and spittle spilling out the side of his mouth!)
Your turn now numbnuts!
Milk brothers! Milked the country ……
Doxycycline is your friend John.
And the winner of the flag referendum is…hold on,,,,,its up here…….
Ok fellas now I have got my Green Credentials,,,,,shove all this green effluent shit into the harbour,,,they will never know…suckers…
Gawd I love this dictatorship, I mean elected postion
At the top secret GCSB spy school,Furher Keys congratulates his top agent for services in the field….
Now I know how the trickle down theory works.
No seriously, I mean it, this time I am taking the pissssss big time!!!
NZ Herald Breaking Front Page News ” Cow Gives Birth To Semi Human!”
I’m not your buddy, guy.
“We are very hands on, Sherlock! Just looking for 36-25-36 or any 10-80 by chance!”
This amount of slippery shit reminds me of a cabinet meeting.
Key is reincarnated as a dairy farmer
Disgraced currency speculator enjoys minimum wage labour
That’s a cow John! No bull!
I’m milking New Zealand for all it’s worth.
ThePullerKey – “(Cocktail party grimace) – I’m the 5th tit……”
Not of rural/dairying roots……have I got that right ?
Love the hair though……pretty yellow bloom……(falsetto) “I’m ivayyyylible…….”
it was a great joint, eh Nathe, wasn’t tit? .
Muldoon pictured appearing uncharacteristically oleaginous.
What’s the prize for the winner?
“Nah mate, I can’t be bothered with that shit – Jason photo-shopped me over Judith – shape of things to come eh đ Yeah, don’t tell the whale for chrissakes…”
A towny twit pulling some terrified tits and smiling smugly about it on Crosby/Textor camera to fool numerous New Zealand numbnuts some more.
John Key pays visit to actual source of own bullshit.
“I was getting low so I thought I pop up and fill up the limo. I owe a lot to these guys. Not that I pay them any more than I legally have to. I operate within the law.”
I’m getting down and dirty with our wealth creators. I’ll stand in the cow poo with the best of them, because I know the old saying ‘Where there’s muck there’s brass’. And because I’m a showman I’ll sing you Tom Lehrer’s Pollution song.
I never thought I’d be fumbling so low with tits like these. (Gives awkward smile.) Still it’s a dirty job and a PM with Crosby Textor managing the show has to do the hard stuff as he’s told.
Awww yeah!
“Just doing a refresher on my number skills ; One, two, three, four, five, six! Wow, six titties!”
And the cow said. Can I crap on crap
Can someone move those piles of shit out of my excrement please.
“In just a few moments I’ll be able to reveal some of the new jobs being created in Northland…”
Cow talk This bloke is getting on my tits big time.