Caption Competition
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11:56 am, April 11th, 2016 - 72 comments
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1 day ago - Bernard's pick 'n' mix of the news links at 6:06 am
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News that 1000 jobs at the Ministry of Education and Oranga Tamariki could go is devastating for future generations of New Zealanders. ...1 day ago - Release: Alarm as Government signals further blow to school lunchesMore essential jobs could be on the chopping block, this time Ministry of Education staff on the school lunches team are set to find out whether they're in line to lose their jobs. ...1 day ago
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The Government’s policy announced today to ease consenting for coal mining will have a lasting impact across generations. ...2 days ago - Release: Public transport costs to double as National looks at unaffordable roading project insteadCancelling urgently needed new Cook Strait ferries and hiking the cost of public transport for many Kiwis so that National can announce the prospect of another tunnel for Wellington is not making good choices, Labour Transport Spokesperson Tangi Utikere said. ...3 days ago
- Release: Cost of living in Auckland still not a priorityA laundry list of additional costs for Tāmaki Makarau Auckland shows the Minister for the city is not delivering for the people who live there, says Labour Auckland Issues spokesperson Shanan Halbert. ...3 days ago
- Greens look to fast-track submissions on harmful lawThe Green Party has today launched a step-by-step guide to help New Zealanders make their voice heard on the Government’s democracy dodging and anti-environment fast track legislation. ...6 days ago
- Release: Govt should stop making people’s lives harder and build more homesThe National Government’s proposed changes to the Residential Tenancies Act will mean tenants can be turfed from their homes by landlords with little notice, Labour housing spokesperson Kieran McAnulty said. ...1 week ago
- Release: Melissa Lee missing in action on mediaThe action Melissa Lee promised to protect democracy and the media sector is missing, Media and Communications spokesperson Willie Jackson said. ...1 week ago
- Landlord Government leaves little hope for rentersThe Government’s announcement on tenancy rules prove that it does not care about renters. ...1 week ago
- Opportunity to build a more sustainable economyGreen Party co-leader Marama Davidson is calling on all parties to support a common-sense change that’s great for the planet and great for consumers after her member’s bill was drawn from the ballot today. ...1 week ago
- Significant step forward in fixing cruel and unjust pastA significant milestone has been reached in the fight to strike an anti-Pasifika and unfair law from the country’s books after Teanau Tuiono’s members’ bill passed its first reading. ...1 week ago
- Missed opportunity but NZ will surely one day recognise the right to a sustainable environmentNew Zealand has today missed the opportunity to uphold the right to a clean, healthy, and sustainable environment, says James Shaw after his member’s bill was voted down in its first reading. ...1 week ago
- Release: Don’t cut our lunches – clear message sent to GovernmentTens of thousands of people are demanding the Government commits to fully funding free and healthy school lunches. ...1 week ago
- Release: Govt makes U-turn on Suicide Prevention OfficeLabour welcomes the Government’s U-turn on the closure of the Suicide Prevention Office, says Labour Mental Health spokesperson Ingrid Leary. ...1 week ago
- CCC issues warning over further climate delayToday’s advice from the Climate Change Commission paints a sobering reality of the challenge we face in combating climate change, especially in light of recent Government policy announcements. ...1 week ago
- Luxon targets lame and lousy example of leadershipIf talk is cheap, Chris Luxon’s “targets” are bankrupt. ...1 week ago
- Luxon targets are lousy example of leadershipIf talk is cheap, Chris Luxon’s “targets” are bankrupt. ...1 week ago
- Release: Commitment to disability communities missing from Govt prioritiesMinister for Disability Issues Penny Simmonds appears to have delayed a report back to Cabinet on the progress New Zealand is making against international obligations for disabled New Zealanders. ...1 week ago
- Methane target review is dangerous duplicationThe Government’s newly announced review of methane emissions reduction targets hints at its desire to delay Aotearoa New Zealand’s urgent transition to a climate safe future, the Green Party said. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Government must commit to school building project for disabled studentsThe Government must commit to the Maitai School building project for students with high and complex needs, to ensure disabled students from the top of the South Island have somewhere to learn. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: National must take mental health seriouslyMental Health Minister Matt Doocey and his Government colleagues have made a meal of their mental health commitments, showing how flimsy their efforts to champion the issue truly are, says Labour Mental Health spokesperson Ingrid Leary. ...2 weeks ago
- Referendums for Māori wards a racist step backwardsThe Government's imposed referendum on Māori wards is a racist step backwards for Māori representation, and disregards Te Tiriti o Waitangi. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Job losses at Health not worth it for tax cutsNew Zealand will feel the harm of the National Government’s reckless cuts to jobs at the health ministry for generations, says Ayesha Verrall. ...2 weeks ago
- Press release: No Māori initiatives in Government’s nothing planMāori are yet to see anything from this Government except cuts, reversals and taking our people backwards, Māori Development spokesperson Willie Jackson said. ...2 weeks ago
- Thirty six point PR spinThe Government’s ‘36 point’ plan for the next three months is as pointless as it is hollow. ...2 weeks ago
- Thirty six point PR spinThe Government’s ‘36 point’ plan for the next three months is as pointless as it is hollow. ...2 weeks ago
- Thirty six point PR spinThe Government’s ‘36 point’ plan for the next three months is as pointless as it is hollow. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Social housing off Government’s to-do listThe Coalition Government’s refusal to commit to ongoing funding for social housing is seeing the sector pull back on developments and families watch their dreams of securing a home fade away, says Labour Housing spokesperson Kieran McAnulty. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Less money in most people’s pockets this AprilChanges to minimum wage and benefit indexation means many New Zealanders will get less this year, as the Government gives a big tax break to landlords instead. ...3 weeks ago
- Government commits $20m to Westport flood protection
The Government has announced that $20 million in funding will be made available to Westport to fund much needed flood protection around the town. This measure will significantly improve the resilience of the community, says Local Government Minister Simeon Brown. “The Westport community has already been allocated almost $3 million ...2 hours ago - Taupō takes pole positionThe Government is proud to support the first ever Repco Supercars Championship event in Taupō as up to 70,000 motorsport fans attend the Taupō International Motorsport Park this weekend, says Economic Development Minister Melissa Lee. “Anticipation for the ITM Taupō Super400 is huge, with tickets and accommodation selling out weeks ...3 hours ago
- Cost of living support for low-income homeownersLocal Government Minister Simeon Brown has announced an increase to the Rates Rebate Scheme, putting money back into the pockets of low-income homeowners. “The coalition Government is committed to bringing down the cost of living for New Zealanders. That includes targeted support for those Kiwis who are doing things tough, such ...5 hours ago
- Government backing mussel spat projectThe Coalition Government is investing in a project to boost survival rates of New Zealand mussels and grow the industry, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones has announced. “This project seeks to increase the resilience of our mussels and significantly boost the sector’s productivity,” Mr Jones says. “The project - ...5 hours ago
- Government focused on getting people into workBenefit figures released today underscore the importance of the Government’s plan to rebuild the economy and have 50,000 fewer people on Jobseeker Support, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. “Benefit numbers are still significantly higher than when National was last in government, when there was about 70,000 fewer ...8 hours ago
- Clean energy key driver to reducing emissionsThe Government’s commitment to doubling New Zealand’s renewable energy capacity is backed by new data showing that clean energy has helped the country reach its lowest annual gross emissions since 1999, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. New Zealand’s latest Greenhouse Gas Inventory (1990-2022) published today, shows gross emissions fell ...9 hours ago
- Earthquake-prone buildings review brought forwardThe Government is bringing the earthquake-prone building review forward, with work to start immediately, and extending the deadline for remediations by four years, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “Our Government is focused on rebuilding the economy. A key part of our plan is to cut red tape that ...13 hours ago
- Thailand and NZ to agree to Strategic PartnershipPrime Minister Christopher Luxon and his Thai counterpart, Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin, have today agreed that New Zealand and the Kingdom of Thailand will upgrade the bilateral relationship to a Strategic Partnership by 2026. “New Zealand and Thailand have a lot to offer each other. We have a strong mutual desire to build ...1 day ago
- Government consults on extending coastal permits for portsRMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Transport Minister Simeon Brown have today announced the Coalition Government’s intention to extend port coastal permits for a further 20 years, providing port operators with certainty to continue their operations. “The introduction of the Resource Management Act in 1991 required ports to obtain coastal ...1 day ago
- Inflation coming down, but more work to doToday’s announcement that inflation is down to 4 per cent is encouraging news for Kiwis, but there is more work to be done - underlining the importance of the Government’s plan to get the economy back on track, acting Finance Minister Chris Bishop says. “Inflation is now at 4 per ...1 day ago
- School attendance restored as a priority in health adviceRefreshed health guidance released today will help parents and schools make informed decisions about whether their child needs to be in school, addressing one of the key issues affecting school attendance, says Associate Education Minister David Seymour. In recent years, consistently across all school terms, short-term illness or medical reasons ...1 day ago
- Unnecessary bureaucracy cut in oceans sectorOceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones is streamlining high-level oceans management while maintaining a focus on supporting the sector’s role in the export-led recovery of the economy. “I am working to realise the untapped potential of our fishing and aquaculture sector. To achieve that we need to be smarter with ...1 day ago
- Patterson promoting NZ’s wool sector at International CongressAssociate Agriculture Minister Mark Patterson is speaking at the International Wool Textile Organisation Congress in Adelaide, promoting New Zealand wool, and outlining the coalition Government’s support for the revitalisation the sector. "New Zealand’s wool exports reached $400 million in the year to 30 June 2023, and the coalition Government ...2 days ago
- Removing red tape to help early learners thriveThe Government is making legislative changes to make it easier for new early learning services to be established, and for existing services to operate, Associate Education Minister David Seymour says. The changes involve repealing the network approval provisions that apply when someone wants to establish a new early learning service, ...2 days ago
- RMA changes to cut coal mining consent red tapeChanges to the Resource Management Act will align consenting for coal mining to other forms of mining to reduce barriers that are holding back economic development, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. “The inconsistent treatment of coal mining compared with other extractive activities is burdensome red tape that fails to acknowledge ...2 days ago
- McClay reaffirms strong NZ-China trade relationshipTrade, Agriculture and Forestry Minister Todd McClay has concluded productive discussions with ministerial counterparts in Beijing today, in support of the New Zealand-China trade and economic relationship. “My meeting with Commerce Minister Wang Wentao reaffirmed the complementary nature of the bilateral trade relationship, with our Free Trade Agreement at its ...3 days ago
- Prime Minister Luxon acknowledges legacy of Singapore Prime Minister LeePrime Minister Christopher Luxon today paid tribute to Singapore’s outgoing Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong. Meeting in Singapore today immediately before Prime Minister Lee announced he was stepping down, Prime Minister Luxon warmly acknowledged his counterpart’s almost twenty years as leader, and the enduring legacy he has left for Singapore and South East ...3 days ago
- PMs Luxon and Lee deepen Singapore-NZ tiesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with Singapore Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong. While in Singapore as part of his visit to South East Asia this week, Prime Minister Luxon also met with Singapore President Tharman Shanmugaratnam and will meet with Deputy Prime Minister Lawrence Wong. During today’s meeting, Prime Minister Luxon ...3 days ago
- Antarctica New Zealand Board appointmentsForeign Minister Winston Peters has made further appointments to the Board of Antarctica New Zealand as part of a continued effort to ensure the Scott Base Redevelopment project is delivered in a cost-effective and efficient manner. The Minister has appointed Neville Harris as a new member of the Board. Mr ...3 days ago
- Finance Minister travels to Washington DCFinance Minister Nicola Willis will travel to the United States on Tuesday to attend a meeting of the Five Finance Ministers group, with counterparts from Australia, the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom. “I am looking forward to meeting with our Five Finance partners on how we can work ...3 days ago
- Pet bonds a win/win for renters and landlordsThe coalition Government has today announced purrfect and pawsitive changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to give tenants with pets greater choice when looking for a rental property, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “Pets are important members of many Kiwi families. It’s estimated that around 64 per cent of New ...3 days ago
- Long Tunnel for SH1 Wellington being consideredState Highway 1 (SH1) through Wellington City is heavily congested at peak times and while planning continues on the duplicate Mt Victoria Tunnel and Basin Reserve project, the Government has also asked NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) to consider and provide advice on a Long Tunnel option, Transport Minister Simeon Brown ...3 days ago
- New Zealand condemns Iranian strikesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon and Foreign Minister Winston Peters have condemned Iran’s shocking and illegal strikes against Israel. “These attacks are a major challenge to peace and stability in a region already under enormous pressure," Mr Luxon says. "We are deeply concerned that miscalculation on any side could ...4 days ago
- Huge interest in Government’s infrastructure plansHundreds of people in little over a week have turned out in Northland to hear Regional Development Minister Shane Jones speak about plans for boosting the regional economy through infrastructure. About 200 people from the infrastructure and associated sectors attended an event headlined by Mr Jones in Whangarei today. Last ...6 days ago
- Health Minister thanks outgoing Health New Zealand ChairHealth Minister Dr Shane Reti has today thanked outgoing Health New Zealand – Te Whatu Ora Chair Dame Karen Poutasi for her service on the Board. “Dame Karen tendered her resignation as Chair and as a member of the Board today,” says Dr Reti. “I have asked her to ...6 days ago
- Roads of National Significance planning underwayThe NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) has signalled their proposed delivery approach for the Government’s 15 Roads of National Significance (RoNS), with the release of the State Highway Investment Proposal (SHIP) today, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “Boosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of the Government’s plan to ...6 days ago
- Navigating an unstable global environmentNew Zealand is renewing its connections with a world facing urgent challenges by pursuing an active, energetic foreign policy, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. “Our country faces the most unstable global environment in decades,” Mr Peters says at the conclusion of two weeks of engagements in Egypt, Europe and the United States. “We cannot afford to sit back in splendid ...6 days ago
- NZ welcomes Australian Governor-GeneralPrime Minister Christopher Luxon has announced the Australian Governor-General, His Excellency General The Honourable David Hurley and his wife Her Excellency Mrs Linda Hurley, will make a State visit to New Zealand from Tuesday 16 April to Thursday 18 April. The visit reciprocates the State visit of former Governor-General Dame Patsy Reddy ...6 days ago
- Pseudoephedrine back on shelves for WinterAssociate Health Minister David Seymour has announced that Medsafe has approved 11 cold and flu medicines containing pseudoephedrine. Pharmaceutical suppliers have indicated they may be able to supply the first products in June. “This is much earlier than the original expectation of medicines being available by 2025. The Government recognised ...6 days ago
- NZ and the US: an ever closer partnershipNew Zealand and the United States have recommitted to their strategic partnership in Washington DC today, pledging to work ever more closely together in support of shared values and interests, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. “The strategic environment that New Zealand and the United States face is considerably more ...7 days ago
- Joint US and NZ declarationApril 11, 2024 Joint Declaration by United States Secretary of State the Honorable Antony J. Blinken and New Zealand Minister of Foreign Affairs the Right Honourable Winston Peters We met today in Washington, D.C. to recommit to the historic partnership between our two countries and the principles that underpin it—rule ...7 days ago
- NZ and US to undertake further practical Pacific cooperationForeign Minister Winston Peters has announced further New Zealand cooperation with the United States in the Pacific Islands region through $16.4 million in funding for initiatives in digital connectivity and oceans and fisheries research. “New Zealand can achieve more in the Pacific if we work together more urgently and ...7 days ago
- Government redress for Te Korowai o WainuiāruaThe Government is continuing the bipartisan effort to restore its relationship with iwi as the Te Korowai o Wainuiārua Claims Settlement Bill passed its first reading in Parliament today, says Treaty Negotiations Minister Paul Goldsmith. “Historical grievances of Te Korowai o Wainuiārua relate to 19th century warfare, land purchased or taken ...1 week ago
- Focus on outstanding minerals permit applicationsNew Zealand Petroleum and Minerals is working to resolve almost 150 outstanding minerals permit applications by the end of the financial year, enabling valuable mining activity and signalling to the sector that New Zealand is open for business, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. “While there are no set timeframes for ...1 week ago
- Applications open for NZ-Ireland Research CallThe New Zealand and Irish governments have today announced that applications for the 2024 New Zealand-Ireland Joint Research Call on Agriculture and Climate Change are now open. This is the third research call in the three-year Joint Research Initiative pilot launched in 2022 by the Ministry for Primary Industries and Ireland’s ...1 week ago
- Tenancy rules changes to improve rental marketThe coalition Government has today announced changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to encourage landlords back to the rental property market, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “The previous Government waged a war on landlords. Many landlords told us this caused them to exit the rental market altogether. It caused worse ...1 week ago
- Boosting NZ’s trade and agricultural relationship with ChinaTrade and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay will visit China next week, to strengthen relationships, support Kiwi exporters and promote New Zealand businesses on the world stage. “China is one of New Zealand’s most significant trade and economic relationships and remains an important destination for New Zealand’s products, accounting for nearly 22 per cent of our good and ...1 week ago
- Freshwater farm plan systems to be improvedThe coalition Government intends to improve freshwater farm plans so that they are more cost-effective and practical for farmers, Associate Environment Minister Andrew Hoggard and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay have announced. “A fit-for-purpose freshwater farm plan system will enable farmers and growers to find the right solutions for their farm ...1 week ago
- New Fast Track Projects advisory group namedThe coalition Government has today announced the expert advisory group who will provide independent recommendations to Ministers on projects to be included in the Fast Track Approvals Bill, say RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Regional Development Minister Shane Jones. “Our Fast Track Approval process will make it easier and ...1 week ago
- Pacific and Gaza focus of UN talksForeign Minister Winston Peters says his official talks with the United Nations Secretary-General Antonio Guterres in New York today focused on a shared commitment to partnering with the Pacific Islands region and a common concern about the humanitarian catastrophe in Gaza. “Small states in the Pacific rely on collective ...1 week ago
- Visualising the 1800s or designing wedding invitations: 6 ways you can use AI beyond generating text
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By T.J. Thomson, Senior Lecturer in Visual Communication & Digital Media, RMIT University Midjourney image by T.J. Thomson As more than half of Australian office workers report using generative artificial intelligence (AI) for work, we’re starting to see this technology affect every ...60 mins ago - Falls, fractures and self-harm: 4 charts on how kids’ injury risk changes over time and differs fo...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Lisa Nicole Sharwood, Injury epidemiologist | Expert Witness, UNSW Sydney Sergey Novikov/Shutterstock Injuries are the leading cause of disability and death among Australian children and adolescents. At least a quarter of all emergency department presentations during childhood are injury-related. Injuries can ...60 mins ago
- Choice and control: will NDIS reforms mean people with disability don’t get to decide who they liv...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Di Winkler, Adjunct Associate Professor, Living with Disability Research Centre, La Trobe University Shutterstock/Ground Picture Many Australians with disability feel on the edge of a precipice right now. Recommendations from the disability royal commission and the NDIS review were released late ...1 hour ago
- Asbestos in playground mulch: how to avoid a repeat of this circular economy scandalSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Salman Shooshtarian, Senior Lecturer, School of Property, Construction and Project Management, RMIT University Salman Shooshtarian Asbestos has been found in mulch used for playgrounds, schools, parks and gardens across Sydney and Melbourne. Local communities naturally fear for the health of their ...2 hours ago
- Could Albanese’s bet on homegrown green industries be the boost our regions deserve?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Madeline Taylor, Senior Lecturer, Macquarie University Cloudy Designs/Shutterstock Right now, there’s a global race underway. The goal: bring back manufacturing and energy jobs as the energy transition speeds up. In 2022, America launched its mammoth Inflation Reduction Act and the ...2 hours ago
- Watch: Prime Minister Christopher Luxon won't say if government will consult public on joining ...
Asked multiple times if the public will be consulted on joining the defence pact, Luxon repeatedly said that was yet to be worked through. ...2 hours ago - Watch live: Prime Minister Christopher Luxon speaks in PhilippinesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon is speaking to reporters on the third leg of his Southeast Asia trip, from Manila in the Philippines. ...2 hours ago
- Māori lawyers call Shane Jones' Waitangi Tribunal comments 'inappropriate'The Māori Law Society says his comments breach the principle of the separation of powers and the Cabinet Manual. ...3 hours ago
- Abortions Increase 25% Since Law Change
Family First says that the latest abortion statistics make grim and upsetting reading, with a 25% increase in abortions since the decriminalisation of abortion in March 2020. According to an Official Information Act request received by Right to Life ...4 hours ago - Over Half Of New Zealanders Feel That The Country Is In Decline And That Our Society Is BrokenIpsos New Zealand's inaugural participation in a global study on populism reveals a pervasive sense of societal and economic decline among New Zealanders. MORE DETAILS AND FULL REPORT HERE Ipsos New Zealand's inaugural participation in a global study ...4 hours ago
- Australia’s new defence strategy is big on ideas, but lacks one key ingredient: well-trained soldi...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Peter Layton, Visiting Fellow, Strategic Studies, Griffith University There have been a lot of defence announcements recently about buying new equipment, building up Australia’s manufacturing capabilities, creating local jobs, new legislation to support AUKUS and even a new defence chief. In ...4 hours ago
- What does Steve Smith’s Stateside signing mean for cricket in the US – and Australia?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tim Harcourt, Industry Professor and Chief Economist, University of Technology Sydney Steve Smith, one of this generation’s finest batters, has conquered much of the cricketing world during his career, and he now has set his sights on a new frontier: the United ...4 hours ago
- A love letter to Wellington: when i open the shop by romesh dissanayake, reviewed
Madeleine Ballard reviews the debut novel from romesh dissanayake. when I open the shop, the debut novel by Naarm-based Aotearoa writer romesh dissanayake (Sri Lankan, Koryo Saram), is a narrative of grief. Devendra loses his mother, opens a noodle shop on The Terrace, grieves, and emerges changed. But just as ...4 hours ago - Minister Concedes Contractors Will Be Hired To Do Work Of Axed Ministry Of Education StaffThe PSA can’t believe that the Minister of Education is happy for her ministry to hire contractors at the same time it is dismissing 565 workers. ...4 hours ago
- Attempt to bar diplomat from Myanmar military junta failsMyanmar community members applied to the courts to bar the diplomat from attending the Association of Southeast Asian Nations. ...5 hours ago
- LGNZ Welcomes Govt Earthquake-prone Buildings DecisionLGNZ has advocated for this decision as part of a remit led by Manawatū District Council. ...5 hours ago
- AUKUS Pillar 2 a 'fragrant, methane-wrapped bull***' – Bob CarrThe former Australian Foreign Minister has continued to warn New Zealand against joining the defence pact. ...5 hours ago
- Enforceable undertaking issued to abc accounting services limited after continued non-compliance.The Department of Internal Affairs (DIA) has accepted an enforceable undertaking agreement from ABC Accounting Services Limited (ABC) under section 81 of the Anti-Money Laundering and Countering Financing of Terrorism Act 2009 (AML/CFT Act). ...6 hours ago
- REVEALED: RNZ’s Hypocrisy Over Fair Digital News Bargaining BillThe Taxpayers’ Union can reveal that Radio New Zealand (RNZ) spent $71,842.53 on Facebook advertising over the past 12 months, despite earlier this year coming out in support of the Fair Digital News Bargaining Bill , which would force the likes ...6 hours ago
- Police rejected 'very good offer' – Mark MitchellPolice Minister Mark Mitchell says the pay offer rejected by police was the best the government could put forward under difficult financial circumstances. ...6 hours ago
- How can we have truth-telling without the Voice? Our research shows a way forwardSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Heidi Norman, Professor, Faculty of Arts, Design and Architecture, Convenor: Indigenous Land & Justice Research Group, UNSW Sydney Shutterstock The Uluru Statement from the Heart set out the aspirations of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples for “Voice, Treaty, Truth”, in ...6 hours ago
- NZ education scores must improve – but another polarising ideological pivot isn’t the answerSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Bronwyn E Wood, Associate Professor in Education, Te Herenga Waka — Victoria University of Wellington Getty Images You don’t need to look hard right now to see concerns about Aotearoa New Zealand’s education system. Declining performance in international testing has been ...6 hours ago
- An updated tally of the public sector job cutsThe coalition government has made it well known it expects departments to cut roles. We break down the numbers as they currently stand. Updated: 12pm, April 18 Before last year’s election, both National and Act made it clear that the public service was squarely in their crosshairs. Both parties, now ...6 hours ago
- Confessions of an unlikely petrolheadCheckered Flag director Natalie Wilson on her lifelong love of motorsport, and the allure of Pukekohe Park Raceway. One childhood summer when my world revolved around winning stuff off the radio, I bagged tickets to Western Springs Speedway and then to Waikaraka Park in what was a dream season for ...6 hours ago
- 'Ambitious' trade pledge headlines Luxon's Thailand stopThe Prime has announced a commitment to triple two-way trade with Thailand by 2045, but it only requires maintaining current growth. ...7 hours ago
- ‘The right person’: What did Solomon Islanders vote for?By Koroi Hawkins, RNZ Pacific editor in Honiara After a relatively well organised and peaceful day of voting in Solomon Islands yesterday, the electoral commission is working with donor partners to safely transport ballot boxes from polling stations all over the country to centrally located counting venues. It is a ...7 hours ago
- What it’s like to be made redundant by the Ministry of EducationI was one of hundreds of people who lost my government job this week. Here’s exactly how it played out. It is a Friday. I’m in the middle of an online Teams hui working out the finer details of a series of workshops we’ll be presenting next week. It’s a ...8 hours ago
- What are ‘Ozempic babies’? Can the drug really increase your chance of pregnancy?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Karin Hammarberg, Senior Research Fellow, Global and Women’s Health, School of Public Health & Preventive Medicine, Monash University Joshua Rodriguez/Unsplash Hundreds of thousands of people worldwide are taking drugs like Ozempic to lose weight. But what do we actually know about ...9 hours ago
- Why the kookaburra’s iconic laugh is at risk of being silencedSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Diana Kuchinke, Lecturer in Ecology, Federation University Australia Linda Robertus/Shutterstock Once, while teaching a class of environmental science students in China’s Hebei University of Science and Technology, I asked who knew what a laughing kookaburra was. There were many blank faces. ...9 hours ago
- Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Claire Breen, Professor of Law, University of Waikato smolaw11/Getty Images School truancy has been a concern across the political spectrum for years. But proposed solutions have largely failed to address the core reasons for unexplained school absences. Despite the apparent ...9 hours ago
- ‘Listening is the most important part’: 10 things students with disability and their families wa...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Melissa Cain, Senior Lecturer in Inclusive Education and Arts Education, Australian Catholic University Agence Olloweb/Unsplash, CC BY About 90% of Australian students with disability attend mainstream schools. Equitable access and participation in education is a fundamental human right. But as last ...9 hours ago
- Will global oil supply be at risk if Iran and Israel pull the Middle East into war?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Flavio Macau, Associate Dean – School of Business and Law, Edith Cowan University Tensions in the Middle East have escalated following Iran’s weekend missile and drone attacks on Israel, heightening concerns of a wider conflict. As with the Russian invasion of Ukraine, ...9 hours ago
- No, getting your boyfriend to peel an orange won’t prove his loyalty. Why TikTok relationship ‘t...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Edith Jennifer Hill, Associate Lecturer, Learning & Teaching Innovation, Flinders University Shutterstock Have you ever wondered if your partner really loves you? Well apparently so have thousands of TikTok users, who are testing their theories for the world to see. In ...9 hours ago
- New Zealand’s Annual Emissions Fell In 2022, For Third Successive YearThis is the third successive decrease year-on-year. New Zealand’s gross emissions for 2022 were 78.4 Mt CO2-e. ...9 hours ago
- Oranga Tamariki job cuts: 'We can't establish what their endgame is'Oranga Tamariki has failed to explain how hundreds of job cuts will achieve a better outcome for children, a children's advocate says. ...9 hours ago
- Help Me Hera: My parents won’t help out with my kidsThey pressured me to have children, and I had two. Now they won’t lift a finger. Want Hera’s help? Email your problem to helpme@thespinoff.co.nz Hi Hera, I suspect it’s a familiar pattern. Back in the day, as a single gal, I was plagued with questions from my parents about when I would find ...9 hours ago
- Care Workers Call For Fairness On Pay Equity Anniversary“The Government has an opportunity here to really correct the course for the care and support workforce, and the people they look after. This cannot be just another area left in the cold, we need real leadership to ensure the proper quality of care ...10 hours ago
- First evidence of ancient human occupation found in giant lava tube cave in Saudi ArabiaSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Mathew Stewart, Research Fellow, Australian Research Centre for Human Evolution, Griffith University The western passage of the Umm Jirsan lava tube. Green Arabia Project If you look from above, you can see thousands of stone structures dotting the landscape of the Arabian ...10 hours ago
- Teachers worry about curriculum, NCEA changes amid staff cutsMore than 500 jobs are likely to be cut at the Education Ministry with concerns about how the curriculum and NCEA changes will now be managed. ...10 hours ago
- Government IT systems need a $800m overhaulThe government is facing a bill of more than $800 million to overhaul back-office IT systems, and attempts to lessen its impact have hit delays. ...10 hours ago
- Over 3,000 public service jobs now proposed to goThe Ministry of Education confirmed a proposal to reduce headcount by 565, while Oranga Tamariki’s proposal would result in a loss of 447 jobs, writes Anna Rawhiti-Connell in this excerpt from The Bulletin, The Spinoff’s morning news round-up. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign up here. Ministry of ...10 hours ago
- Kāinga Ora delays building projects ahead of reviewKāinga Ora is unable to say how many new KiwiBuild developments have been delayed as it waits for the outcome of the government's independent review of the state housing agency. ...11 hours ago
- Owners of earthquake prone buildings given four extra years to complete strengtheningA review into the regulations was also being brought forward. ...11 hours ago
- Corrections Accepts Recommendations Following Auckland Prison InspectionThe Inspectorate made three overarching recommendations following the inspection, all of which have been accepted in full by Corrections. ...11 hours ago
- Auckland’s dumped Commonwealth Games bid has lessons for Christchurch
The crippling cost and complexity of Christchurch’s Commonwealth Games ambitions have become clearer The post Auckland’s dumped Commonwealth Games bid has lessons for Christchurch appeared first on Newsroom. ...13 hours ago - Oranga Tamariki services for at-risk children will get better after job cuts, minister says"We need to make sure that every dollar we're spending is actually for the benefit of our young people," says Children's Minister Karen Chhour. ...13 hours ago
- How the coalition plans to replace the quickly scrapped Māori Health AuthorityThe coalition government got rid of the Māori Health Authority in a hurry. What is it doing now instead? ...13 hours ago
- How to tell if your child is well enough to go to school or is in fact sickDavid Seymour announced new guidelines this week for sending your kids to school with symptoms. Emily Writes sums them up. Parents knee deep in snotty tissues and buckets of vomit were granted a much-welcome reprieve by associate education minister David Seymour on Wednesday with the announcement that he will advise ...13 hours ago
- We’re asking the wrong questions about treaty settlementsWhen the Crown is the self-appointed ultimate authority over a process to deal with Crown misconduct, we run into big issues, writes Tina Ngata. “What’s it going to take for Ngā Puhi to settle” was the headliner statement on Q&A last weekend, as Ngā Puhi chair Mana Tahere was interviewed ...13 hours ago
- Police briefings show finances at ‘tipping point’There is a forecast deficit of $120m only brought down to $56m through cost-cutting measures The post Police briefings show finances at ‘tipping point’ appeared first on Newsroom. ...13 hours ago
- Pharmac and the keys to the drug cupboardClose to 3,500,000 prescriptions for paracetamol are written in New Zealand every year. It’s just one of the treatments funded by Pharmac, the drug agency that barters with pharmaceutical companies to get medicines for us at the lowest cost possible. Currently its yearly budget is about $1.5 billion, but apparently ...13 hours ago
- Book of the Week: Mothering in late-stage capitalismI think a capitalist patriarchy that relies on monogamous heterosexuality and gender essentialism is the worst system to ensure the survival of our species. Just watch an episode of MAFS Australia. I don’t think there’s anything natural or normal about this system, instead I think it’s a construct kept in ...13 hours ago
- Luxon spreads his wings in ThailandLuxon touched down in Thailand late on Tuesday night, before launching into a packed day of business breakfasts and bilateral meetings in the kingdom’s capital. The visit to Thailand comes after Luxon’s Singapore swing – somewhat of a love-in for the Kiwi Prime Minister, where he shmoozed high-net worth individuals, ...13 hours ago
- New Zealand’s crisis of confidenceThree in five New Zealanders say our country is in decline and our society is broken, exclusive new polling reveals The post New Zealand’s crisis of confidence appeared first on Newsroom. ...13 hours ago
- Daily crossword, Thursday 18 AprilThe post Daily crossword, Thursday 18 April appeared first on Newsroom. ...13 hours ago
- New Zealand broken and in decline, Kiwis sayA global wave of disillusionment and disenfranchisement has not spared New Zealand, with a majority of respondents to a survey here agreeing that New Zealand society is broken and the country is in decline. Ipsos New Zealand asked 1001 Kiwis about their hopes for the future and their views of ...13 hours ago
- Labour all at sea against Govt’s legislative blitzkriegOpinion: The embittered negativity of Labour’s prominent spokespeople is preventing political exploitation of rapid Government change The post Labour all at sea against Govt’s legislative blitzkrieg appeared first on Newsroom. ...13 hours ago
- Staff shortages key to Auckland Prison’s failure to uphold inmates’ rightsOpinion: At a time when government departments are shedding workers to fund budgetary cuts, the news that staff shortages have caused prisoners to be in solitary confinement for periods longer than eight months is frightening. This revelation is one of several in the Prison Inspectorate’s most recent report, published ...13 hours ago
- Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 18 AprilLoading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A[quiz],DIV[quiz],A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp'); Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions. The post Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 18 April appeared first on Newsroom. ...13 hours ago
- A montage of West Papuan everyday life from hip-hop to protest songsI came to this evening of short films not sure what to expect. I have a history with West Papua (here referring to the Indonesian part of the island of New Guinea, which comprises five provinces, one named “West Papua”) from my days fronting the legendary West Papuan band Black ...18 hours ago
- Ministry of Education plans to cut 565 rolesIt makes the proposal the biggest single slash to a public service agency so far. ...22 hours ago
- Oranga Tamariki proposes to cut more than 400 jobsAbout 1900 roles would be affected overall - either changed or disestablished - in the "scope of restructuring work". ...22 hours ago
- Politics with Michelle Grattan: Independent MP Dai Le on the church attack in her electorateSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra After the stabbing of Bishop Mar Mari Emmanuel in an Assyrian Orthodox Church in Wakeley on Monday, and the killings in Bondi Junction shopping centre just two days earlier, many people in Sydney and in ...22 hours ago
- Government issues guidelines for when sick children should be kept home from schoolCovid-19? Symptoms including fever, vomiting, diarrhoea or head lice? Your children should be at home, new government guidelines say. ...23 hours ago
- Australia’s long-sought stronger environmental laws just got indefinitely deferred. It’s back to...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Euan Ritchie, Professor in Wildlife Ecology and Conservation, School of Life & Environmental Sciences, Deakin University We’ve long known Australia’s main environmental protection laws aren’t doing their job, and we know Australians want better laws. Labor was elected promising to fix them. ...24 hours ago
- AI is making smart devices – watches, speakers, doorbells – easier to hack. Here’s how to stay...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Chao Chen, Deputy Director, Enterprise AI and Data Analytics Hub, RMIT Univeristy, RMIT University Ivan Bandura/Unsplash From asking our smart speakers for the weather to receiving personalised advice from smartwatches, devices powered by artificial intelligence (AI) are increasingly streamlining our routines ...1 day ago
- Police Association members reject latest government pay offerPolice Association says members are looking for a sincere effort by the government to address the cost of living crisis and recognise the increasing dangers officers faced. ...1 day ago
- Global coral bleaching caused by global warming demands a global responseSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Britta Schaffelke, Manager International Partnerships and Co-ordinator of the Global Coral Reef Monitoring Network (GCRMN), Australian Institute of Marine Science Bleached coral at the Keppel Islands in the southern Great Barrier Reef in early March 2024. © AIMS | Eoghan Aston ...1 day ago
- The beginnings of modern science shaped how philosophers saw alien life – and how we understand it...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Philip C. Almond, Emeritus Professor in the History of Religious Thought, The University of Queensland Wikipedia Speculation about extraterrestrials is not all that new. There was a vibrant debate in 17th-century Europe about the existence of life on other planets. ...1 day ago
- Families including someone with mental illness can experience deep despair. They need supportSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Amanda Cole, Lead, Mental Health, Edith Cowan University In the aftermath of the tragic Bondi knife attack, Joel Cauchi’s parents have spoken about their son’s long history of mental illness, having been diagnosed with schizophrenia at age 17. They said they were ...1 day ago
- How Fast-track Consenting Might Impact The Environment – Expert ReactionSubmissions on the Fast-track Approvals Bill close at the end of Friday. The law would allow major infrastructure projects to bypass lengthy resource consenting processes – being assessed instead by an expert panel , with Ministers ultimately having ...1 day ago
- Changes To ECE RegulationsIn QPEC's view, the Coalition changes to ECE announced mid-April are exactly the opposite of what is needed The Issue David Seymour is loosening regulations and qualifications for Early Childhood Centres, removing government signoff for new ...1 day ago
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“My Public believe me.”
“My Public me whatever I do.”
“Well Lynton said I can do anything and say anything and they still believe me, even when I outright lie”
“Me too.”
Do you smell pork?
And then I told them we would have a “fool” make an “independent” Inquiry ! snigger snigger.
Who cares what two white Tory scum are doing,
really, who cares?
‘
Well, they are the leaders of their respective nations both exposed as participants in massive international tax avoidance. But, really, with this particular little exercise, turning them into objects of mockery is the main interest.
Interesting!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXmQaBY_9Yc
So much anger, adam. You should address that or it will eat you.
hahahahahahahahhahahah. Did you read the header The Gormless Fool formerly known as Oleolebiscuitbarrell, have you not seen these before?
Seriously serious much.
Just out of interest if it where a photo of Mugabe and Zuma would you call them black scum?
Political Correctness gone mad b waghorn? Or just feeling sensitive today?
You didnt offend me i assure you ,it just amuses me how further lefties in nz have this white man hate, when there is plenty of proof that the colour of skin isn’t linked to ones scum level.
No, but Tory scum generally are white though.
My trust is bigger than your trust and more well hidden.
It’s your turn so you eat the soggy biscuit.
Oh no you don’t, you were the last to release your tax returns so you eat it!.
JK – I’ve always looked up to you Dave
Pigs head you say, I can only a kiwi. Oh an Maltese
edit: you know, those cute little…..those cameras are ackshelly werking,,, chocolate balls lovely.
JK to DC
Hahaha you got caught Im still in the clear. Better start moving out Dave ,I could take your place for a while .Ive already run a small country to the ground a big ones more of a challenge
Looks like tax dodging trust fund trouble is about to come knocking
“…and then you say ‘Open Sesame’ and you get to share out the loot with your Forty Thieves…”
$17,000, what a paltry amount. Lucky I own a small country and the SIS and have so many friends in the US intelligence to make sure my money is safely hidden.
I hid my money in Panama, John. Where did you hide yours?
“I couldn’t believe my luck when Corbyn was elected leader”
“Really, you should try going up against this Little bloke. I can’t lose!”
“The funny thing is Dave, that while your defence is that you cannot be blamed for the sins of your father and your supporters are shouting it, back home the Socialists are having such a problem with the Lange period. You see we can sheet almost everything back to them as it is all their fault. And the public are swallowing it…”
I see a black door and I want to paint it red,
No colors anymore, I want them to turn red.
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes.
You’ve got a trust fund well we’ve all got one of those.
Haven’t we John.
From the people who bought you “Pony Tail Summer Camp” & “The boys from Bullingdon ”
Starring “Call me Dave” Cameron and Big John ” Shon” Key in this summers financial scandal/nothing to see here hit ….
” Makin Bacon”
This is good. Makes me miss the Neetflux posters.
Tweedledum and Tweedledee.
No,no Dave, it wasn’t me trying to remove the Union Jack, it was LLaybar akshuly..,(he then makes that sucking in air sound like he’s toking on a joint)
The door knocking scene from Labyrinth now has new meaning.
“What do you think Ludo, which do we choose out of these two ugly characters?”
J: Trust? Moi? Never…. at least not that I can remember. Anyway if the crap hits the fan I always scuttle off to Planet Key and leave my cronies to mop up my messes.
D: I tried that and the peasants got up a petition to ban my return… revolting oiks.
3 knocks and you are in, no strings and tax. You want to go first John?
Left Door Knocker: It’s very rude to stare!
Sarah: Oh! I’m sorry, I was just wondering which door to choose.
Left Door Knocker: HUH?
Right Door Knocker: [muffled] It’s no good asking him, he’s deaf as a post!
Left Door Knocker: Don’t talk with your mouth full!
Right Door Knocker: [muffled] I’m not talking with my mouth full, I…
Sarah: Wait, wait, I can’t understand you.
[she takes the ring out of his mouth]
Right Door Knocker: Ah! Mm. Oh, oh, it is so good to get that thing out.
Sarah: What were you saying?
Right Door Knocker: I said, it’s no good talking to him, he’s deaf as a post.
Left Door Knocker: Mumble mumble mumble! You’re a wonderful conversational companion!
Right Door Knocker: You can talk, all you do is moan!
Left Door Knocker: No good! Can’t hear you!
Sarah: What’s behind these doors?
Left Door Knocker: WHAT?
Right Door Knocker: Search me. We’re just the knockers!
[laughs]
Sarah: Oh.
[she goes to the left door, pushes on it]
Sarah: How do I get through?
Left Door Knocker: HUH?
Right Door Knocker: Knock, and the door will open!
Sarah: Oh.
Ludo: [with the ring in his mouth] Hmmph?
Sarah: [amused] Ludo!
[she takes the ring from Ludo, holds it out to the Right Door Knocker]
Right Door Knocker: Hey! I don’t want that thing back in my mouth!
Sarah: C’mon, I want to knock!
Right Door Knocker: MM-MM!
“The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.”
Final words of Animal Farm – George Orwell.
“Panamanian fun seekers, John? Don’t know what you mean.”
Two Heads of State and one brain scan revealing a huge moral cavity.
Still crushing the opposition in the polls? You bet Dave.
We even look alike, I can’t believe how clever Crosby Textor are!
Is that a piggy in the middle?
JK: “Haha I just sold off NZ’s power companies & state housing, raised GST, signed the TPPA, and turned NZ into a tax haven for international tax crime!”
DC: “Thanks for that, Daddy has already set me up with a nice tax free trust. And I’m selling the NHS, cutting disability benefits, and buying lovely Trident missiles with the proceeds!”
JK: “OK you win this round, but I will be back!”
Cameron to Key:
No, no, you won’t be coming in to my Exclusive Club, you wait out here you oily little tick ! When I was at Eton we used to line up four or five of your sort, make em bend over and use em as a rack for toasting crumpets, you Grotty little working class man !!!
“You’re right it’s just fantastic, there’s no need to hide our money anymore; we can really show it.”
JK: “Dave, I read that someone called you and I slim eballs – what’s a slim eball?
DC: “Is that so Mr ‘Soap-on-the-shower-floor-Key? Well close the gap and you’ll find out”
JK: “aye? Ha, ha, I don’t think so Dave, I’m a soap-on-a-rope kinda guy, sorry.”
DC: “I didn’t think you’d get it”
“Actually, John, this photo will express to voters my understanding of Jean-Paul Sartre’s 1944 play “Huis Clos” and how I will apply it into any future investigations into tax evasion.”
“Was he the bloke who said “Seek and you find? Knock and the door shall be opened to you?” That didn’t apply to tax collectors, did it?”
OK John, I will Knock 3 times and then we run ok? and try to keep up this time!
DC to JK “Who the **** are you?”
The Lion, The Two Witches, No wardrobe
DC: Man i am in deep got caught out on tax havens
JK: Don’t fret I get away with it all the time, just set up a flag referendum, they will never know
Two New Inexperienced Bouncers, employed at The Lynton Crosby Ball
Oh I see you use the same tailor as I do John,
Yes David,,I always get the deep pockets added to my suits.
Really….why is that John?
Well it comes in handy when there’s a pissing competition…
I fecking tried open sesame,,,now wheres the fecking key…u what? u lost it?
DC: I see your still persisting withe comb over….by the way, i think u may need some head and shoulders.
Profile shots of the beloved leaders taken for the new mint of one pound coins….selling for tuppence
DC: Sorry JK, you cant buy it, i just sold this door offshore for a handsome non taxable profit,,,,yet mums the world ok?
JK: Bloody Hell, you actually provide free food banks in your country?
….Isnt that a tad generous?
DC: I have had to invite you outside to demand satisfaction……..
That’s was my wife, how dare you pull her ponytail!
Their eyes meet across the front door step………………………………..it was instantaneous.
Of all the front door steps…… in all the world you found mine.
.
DC: Right when you go inside, don’t mention anything about President Trumps lovely hair…
JK: No Probs
DC: I have no idea, usually one of my servants do it….
JK: I haven’t a clue either, one of my bodyguards opens the doors for me
And its good night from him and its good night from him.
dc and jk arrive at Hells gate…Perfect timing!!!
Two for the price of one.
knock knock knocking on uber tax havens door.
DC: If you rub this Caymen island snake oil into your scalp you will have a full head of hair by the morning!…..that will be 1000 $ Us please, paid into my not very secret account….
JK: Done!
JK: Last time i visited you had two knockers, i am sure of it..
DC: Austerity cuts into everything, so we out sourced the other knocker
JK: You should see the knockers i have back home in Wellington!
DC & JK both wait to enter room 101, to face their greatest fear……their tax returns
It’s the room where Winston was interrogated………………..mind the rats!
JK: Well I dint invite him!
DC: I dint invite him either!:
JK: Well we will just have to stay here till he stops talking cak and leaves
DC: That could be a while, its freezing out here:
JK: I wonder how the hell that right wing apologist Pete George got his hands on an invite?
Rentokill’s, New Lion Rat deterrence, didn’t seem to be working….
In fact it seem to attract them!
No 10 Fancy Dress Party…..Oh you came as a swine too!
lol…you wanna hear a good piggy joke?…it is about the piggy and his goods and services taxes
we really must get tougher on tax evasion
my left hand does not know what my right hand is doing…compartmentalization is the way to go
….and one rule for the rich and another for the poor
…i see we have an understanding
It’s so damn hard to pick a winner from the wit displayed here. Give me a minute…. OKAY I choooooose Colonial Viper again!
Short, sharp and succinct yet not giving away the fact he would be happy to be piggy in the middle of a Key / Cameron sandwich.
The rest of you need to up your game. You only evinced moderate chuckles, not great gasping belly laughs. Toodles 🙂