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Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 2:24 pm, September 7th, 2011 - 44 comments
Categories: caption contest, john key - Tags: ,

44 comments on “Caption contest ”

  1. sally 1

    Key offers Gillard Sandra Gaudie’s token ginga spot on National’s list.

  2. ak 2

    EYE CARUMBA! BLINDING PASH-IN: Gillard loses cornea in “Captain Beaky” nose mishap: “slipperiest lips I’ve ever not felt” Docs: lack of tongue involvement “fortunate due to forked nature”.

  3. grumpy 3

    On the lips John, on the lips!!!!

  4. Dotty 4

    It’s okay, I’ve had a vasectomy you know.

  5. ianmac 5

    “Its so hard to smile, wave, and kiss,” mumbled John Key through numbed lips.

  6. Steve 7

    John Key reveals a ‘socialist streak’ of his own as Gillard proves too much to resist.

  7. grumpy 8

    Bring your kneepads Julia???????

  8. Penguins Pal 9

    New Zealand’s most popular Prime Minister EVER, kisses Australia’s most unpopular Prime Minister EVER. Julia wishes it was Helen though!

  9. joe90 10

    Look at moy, look at moy. JK, Look at moy. Now I’ve got one word to say to you… carbon tax

  10. Craig Glen Eden 11

    Im not a journalist John you dont have to pay me for this, you can keep that bottle corked cobber.

  11. grumpy 12

    Send me a postcard from wherever you are going Julia……

  12. D-D-D-Damn! 13

    Julia (swerving at the last moment): “Oh no you bloody don’t, Mr Halitosis !”

  13. prism 14

    King John of Charmalot to a t. (BLiP)

  14. D-D-D-Damn! 15

    John: “Now Julia, there’s no reason we can’t both be adult about this, it’s just a thing I’ve got. I’ve always had this deep, inner need to lick the nostrils of all foreign leaders and dignitaries, not just your’s.”

    • D-D-D-Damn! 15.1

      John: “Julia, I want to slip my tongue in.”

      Julia: “Awww, get off the grass, ya bloody mongrel !”

      John: “But, Kevin Rudd let me ! In fact, he insisted !”

  15. cobalt 16

    the kiss of judas

    • D-D-D-Damn! 16.1

      Julia’s thoughts: “Awww Christ !, I don’t wanna kiss this mongrel, but I don’t wanna cause a diplomatic incident either. Awww Geez mate, I feel like I’m up Shit Creek in a barbed wire canoe !”

      * Australian pronunciation: “…I feel like I’m up Sheet Creek in a barbed woyer canoe !”

  16. Joe Bloggs 17

    Key offers olive branch of lurve to next NZ Labour leader

    • D-D-D-Damn! 17.1

      John: “Julia, I’m horny, I’M HORNY !, the ladies – they adore me. What are my chances of sleeping with you tonight ?”

      Julia: “Awww Geez Mate, how can I put it ? About as likely as me sleeping with David Farrar, Joe Bloggs, Burt, Grumpy or Pete George !”

      John: “Oh Christ, you bitch !, you could have let me down gently !”

  17. sally 18

    No, this one’s definitely not a lesbian.

  18. fabregas4 19

    “I always thought that Liz Hurley was hot but a bird in the hand is aksully even better, (though I could get you five lawyers that would tell you differently if I had too)”

  19. rod 20

    I can smell the bullshit on your breath John.

  20. HC 21

    Julia: “Grrrh! What rotten mouth smell John’s got. How does his wife put up with this disgusting stench? I presume she never gets too close to his face and is glad he spends most time in Wellington.”

    John: “Well, if it was not for the cameras and required friendly etiquette, I would do all possible to not put my lips too close to this ugly, red-headed, read-hearted, socialist “pecker”. Thank god it is over right away.”

    Both afterwards: “NZ and Australia are bound together in their common and shared historic roots, values, spirit and loyalty in hard and trying times. We are looking forward to the RWC and a great game between our best in the finals.”

  21. kriswgtn 22

    Godddard To Key

    *sniff* I can smell asshole,hmm which one**sniff OMFG youre pregnant and its a hybrid of Crosby – Textor and Ashcroft so its the cheek bitch the cheek

  22. ropata 23

    Thought processes:
    KEY: “Yeeeehhhaaaaa another photo op ARR ARRR i am KING OF NZ”
    GILLARD: “ocrapocrap he’s headin infor a kiss, escape routes? none, fucking media everywhere, turn head to the right ?? OHSHITOFUCK HE’S GONE THE SAME DIRECTION NO ESCAPE ONTHELIPSFUUUUCCKKK wheres my toothpaste/mouthwash/soap”

  23. John D 24

    Wanna trade some emissions? (*Wink*) The poor people will pay too!

  24. The lizard king inserts tongue in the right nostril and extracts the entire contents of Julia’s stomach.

  25. Next time, put a bit of tongue in it.

    • Talking about a tongue, thank God Helen Clark wasn’t still PM said the mental Ocker bitch as I would now be tongueless
      Kissing a wimpish Key would be far safer,just ask Heather or Jude.

  26. logie97 27

    The media thought I was trying to kiss ya, but acshully I just wanted to see who had the longest nose. Why did you move ya silly cow?

  27. Hez 28

    goin in to kiss julia… nek minut… awkward

  28. randal 29

    soory baby but your key dont fit my front door!

  29. bbfloyd 30

    the john, a well known underworld figure delivers the “kiss of death” on behalf of the liberal party..

  30. Rog Chapman 31

    The secret, Julia, is to
    Smile and wave and walk away!

  31. RobertM 32

    Kiss of convinience, between two pretty faces. Bring back Rudd. Many think Kevin was difficult to work with, kept it within his inner group and did not advance the agenda, but he probably didn’t want to. In reality the the ALP is almost always led by its most right wing remotely sane member. Think Hawke, Keating, Hayden, Lantham and Beazley and Rudd is somewhat furthur to the right than Beazley. Still I like the bob and the bead.

  32. Graham Bathgate 33

    You trying to make it hard for me, Julia?

  33. Treetop 34

    A couple of PMs sniffing one another out.

  34. vanakast 35

    Key improving NZ relations with Aussie.

  35. lcmortensen 36

    Hopefully Bronagh doesn’t see this!

  36. RobC 37

    Key demonstrating what he means by closing the gap with Australia

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