Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 9:36 am, October 25th, 2011 - 70 comments
Categories: caption contest, john key - Tags: ,

70 comments on “Caption contest”

  1. Jimmy 1

    Key too distracted by own reflection in a shiny surface to understand what’s going on, again.

  2. Bill 2

    I’ll trade you that shiney thing for what’s in my hand

  3. Blue 3

    It was all Bernard’s fault. Nothing to do with me!

  4. M 4

    No John, I will not trade the Cup for a place on the party list.

  5. Ayo Bernard, tell that clown beside you to stop tickling my palm or i’m gonna ram this cup in his face !

  6. Graham 6

    Withdraw the paw John!

  7. Paul 7

    Man, I can’t wait until Richie gets married…

  8. I’m smiling, I’m waving I’ve won! I’ve won! Doh!

  9. r0b 9

    Spot the politician.

    Two and a half men.

    Key cops a feel.

    Me too! Me too! Me too!

  10. felix 10

    I have an email that says a Labour PM would have totally fucked this up.

    • Colonial Viper 10.1

      I have an email from a completely trustworthy source which I cannot reveal that says a Labour PM would have totally fucked this up way worse than me.

      🙂

    • Monty 10.2

      Thanks God helen Clark is not here, or she would have jinxed the game and the French would have their first RWC title

      (Yes I know she was at the game – but not in any official capacity – But the curse of Clark is still evident and we were lucky for the positive luck of John Key to counter the Clark Curse)

      • lprent 10.2.1

        Next you’ll be saying that it is all because she once menstruated.

        I’m sure that all of that concentrated dislike of woman has simply rotted your brain to give that stupid Monty effect that we have all come to know and despise.

      • Redbaron77 10.2.2

        If this is a serious argument for John Key then National are truly in dire straits.

      • thejackal 10.2.3

        You do realize that the PM missed the end of the game because he was caught in a lift Monty? Perhaps he had to ask Helen Clark what happened.

        John Key = X2 Credit downgrades, Christchurch no build, budget blowouts, mass exodus, high unemployment, high youth suicide, lying in parliament, Pike River broken promises and the Rena disaster non-response etc… most incompetent and unluckiest PM ever!

        Helen Clark = Paintergate and different light bulbs. Looks like a jinx free zone to me.

  11. Paul 11

    1. Give all the All Blacks a hug.
    2. Give Richie a handshake
    3. Hold the cup aloft
    4. Get a photo with the hooker’s arm around me
    5. Get in the victory parades
    6. Knight Richie
    7. Get invited to Richie’s wedding
    8. Sit as close as I can to the front of the wedding venue
    9. Get another photo with Richie.
    10. Steal the first kiss.

  12. alex 12

    Can I hold the trotie?

    • Sharyanna 12.1

      If you don’t let me hold the troatie I’ll perform my troat-slitting gesture in Parliament again!

  13. I’d rather talk about the epiphany, the moment of clarity captured by the camera where my awareness expanded encompassing the universe and how in that instant of time everything also compacted into oneness within me, a wonderful contradiction that astounded and inflamed my senses and opened my mind to the reality of our existence, our reason for being.

    Yes Bishop John we know you just love talking about that stuff but what viewers really want to know is – how did you fuck up that handshake so bad, I mean come on, that was as bad as it gets – walk us through it.

    (excuse my indulgence) 🙂

  14. Colonial Viper 14

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10761453

    The Herald’s pathetic excuse for John Key’s handshake fumble is worth a read. Apparently John was “fully committed” to the handshake and couldn’t change his clumsiness lol

  15. Ritchie : who’s this fucker?
    McCaw : I thought he was with you.

  16. One Anonymous Bloke 16

    “Même Sarkozy n’est-ce pas désespérée!”

  17. Craig Glen Eden 17

    Bugger!

  18. marsman 18

    Key grasping at McCaw’s paws.

  19. Paul H 19

    Nothing beats using the secret reptilian Illuminati tri-shake in public while the peasants remain oblivious!

  20. Key: “Pull my finger!”

  21. Uturn 21

    “Paper… scissors… oh damn… protocol.”

  22. In future will someone write a simple script for a simple PM to follow on such an occasion.

  23. SukieDamson 23

    Mr Muddle muddles through.

  24. SHG 24

    By looking like an overeager fanboy about to shake hands with Richie McCaw Key has probably increased his preferred PM rating. There isn’t a Kiwi rugby fan in the world who isn’t thinking “fuck me, Key looks as excited as I feel, he really is one of us”.

  25. There isn’t a Kiwi rugby fan in the world who isn’t thinking “fuck me, Key looks as excited as I feel, he really is one of us”.

    Well i’m one Kiwi rugby fan who isn’t thinking that at all. I’m thinking, long after the dust settles and Richie’s raising of the cup goes down in history, as David Kirks holding the trophy aloft has, there will still be Key monging a handshake and embarassing ordinary NZers with his fuckwit glory seeking, media whoring antics.

    fuck what a loser !!!

  26. just saying 26

    Group hug guys?

  27. Nick C 27

    Key goes for the handshake too early, a bit like The Standard’s post on the PREFU, eh 😉

  28. randal 28

    John Kweewee!

  29. richard 29

    Key goes for triple handshake — before he nails the triple downgrade.

  30. One of these men is not like the other,
    One of these men just doesn’t belong.

  31. happynz 31

    Premature shakeulation…

    ewwww.

    • Deuto 32.1

      Those two pictures of Key grabbing the cup say it all! Note that Bernard and Richie are looking directly at one another and not at Key.

  32. notowenglenn 33

    “I’m hoping that post-referendum handshakes will have two less parties than this one.”

  33. Paul Campbell 34

    Guy at the back:: Key you wanker, what about the oil on the beaches?

  34. hellonearthis 35

    Getting an early start as Minister of Innovation. Time saving tip #1 3 way handshake.

  35. notowenglenn 36

    Monsieur Lop Asset meets the Chairmain of the RWC and All Black captain Richie McCaw.

  36. Jenny 37

    Phew! Richie, I just caught your hand in time.

    I know you want to badly slap him. We all do.

    But, just try and keep your hand down, at least for now.

  37. Dave 38

    The Moment John Realised He’s Wasn’t Doing The “Secret Mason” Handshake

  38. Jenny 39

    Colonel Klink look-a-like crashes rugby world cup victory party.

  39. randal 40

    me myself and I.

  40. murali 41

    Shake it..i’m feeling Good !!!

  41. Jenny 42

    Pull the finger!!…. Pull the finger!!….

  42. Key: “My precious trotie… give it to meeee!”

    McCaw: “Keep your dirty filthy hands off my trophy.”

  43. Elce 44

    “Slippery Huh! and he’s looking for a new job!”

  44. DJ 45

    Key: “ME TOO!!!”

  45. swordfish 46

    Thoughts of National Campaign Manager, Steve Joyce, while watching this on TV: “Oh,  Fuck Me !!!, Well, that’s 50,000 votes down the friggin drain, isn’t it !!! Jesus, Key, you are a Fucking Liability !!!”

  46. Craig 47

    Richie: (shuddering) “Why does this bloke reek of oil and rotting seabirds? I feel so *unclean*!!! It’ll take ages to wash that off!!!”

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