Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 8:18 am, October 5th, 2012 - 59 comments
Categories: caption contest, Minister for Overseas Holidays - Tags:

I love this picture.

First, because of how tone-deaf Key has obviously become that his first tweet from his ‘important job creating trip to meet movie executives’ that everyone is so cynical about is a picture of him hanging out with a TV star – who, I’m pretty sure, doesn’t make decisions on filming locations in blockbuster movies. (Does anyone seriously think movie executives make multi-million filming decisions based on meeting a PM anyway?)

Second, because of how awkward Key looks, arms limp, suit jacket unbuttoned, looking the wrong way, next to a guy who clearly knows how take a good picture.

And what does it say about your place in the world when you go to the movie stars, not the other way around ? Clearly, you’re not very important in the scale of things.

Anyhoo, caption contest.

59 comments on “Caption contest ”

  1. toad 1

    Actually, I didn’t really meet Simon Baker. I just got one of my staff to photoshop me in.

  2. toad 2

    GCSB surveillance has revealed that the real identity of Red John is Kim Dotcom.

  3. karol 3

    “Now that I’ve finally found Red John, how do I get him to admit his crimes?”

    PS: I just clicked on those scoop links to JK’s tweets. What a failure as a PM! He just likes schmoozing with the wealthy, famous and powerful.

    • Draco T Bastard 3.1

      I just clicked on those scoop links to JK’s tweets. What a failure as a PM! He just likes schmoozing with the wealthy, famous and powerful.

      His tweets are all about showing how rich and powerful he is to his followers. They have no other value.

  4. Oh God I didn’t even know who Simon Baker was until I looked up the tweeter link. And the Mentalist? I mean: Lying Scumbag meets the Mentalist. I’m sure they could have used that for a plot line!

    Geez, the things you have to do as a TV actor!

  5. Te Reo Putake 5

    One of these men is a mentalist living in a world of greed, crime and lies. The other is an actor.

  6. fustercluck 6

    “Read my mind”
    “I’m drawing a blank”

  7. ” Look at moi “

  8. ” Sh sh dont talk about what is happening at home in nuzlnd,just look like we are
    great mates, hey, why dont you smile,you
    are an actor,aren’t you? i’m john key and i
    own nuzlnd wif me mates.

  9. billbrowne 9

    Hollow man gives wooden performance

  10. ak 10

    Liar Liar star in Mentalist cameo: forgets lines – again!

  11. Merkin 11

    Day / Interior.

    Generic, conventionally handsome American actor
    I know your name is Mr Key, but get out of my key light, you’re casting a shadow over may perfect American features!

    Bland, ex currency trader, self made, twat PM
    Don’t worry ’bout it. This shadow is nothing compared to the one I’m casting over my own country. Sorry, I don’t mean MY country, of course it’s YOUR country. Please come down and wipe your TPP shoes on us. Remember the old film biz saying about us kiwi’s – “Mexicans with cell phones”. I love show biz, especially you beautiful people. It’s unfortunate that behind the scenes there’s ugly, greedy film “industry” workers and actors who want reasonable conditions. Race to the bottom, creative sweat shop that’s what I preach…….. I how depressing. You don’t have any snuff movie shoots I can act in do you? LOL.

    Generic, conventionally handsome American actor
    I’m sorry, is that actually English you’re speaking? Did you bring a translator with you?

  12. Varkk 12

    I think we would be hard pressed to top the one Mr Dotcom apparently posted on his facebook
    http://imgur.com/RsaqL

  13. Kotahi Tāne Huna 13

    Planking fail.

  14. Clashman 14

    Hey, you did those ANZ ads, so your sort of a banker too then. Can we be mates? Please…oh go on…

  15. felix 15

    Mr Bean’s Overseas Holiday

  16. sadly the audition was a disaster and the new remake of the Odd Couple movie has been shelved. key apologised for not reading the script and for never having heard of ‘auditions’, he quiped that normally he just gets tapped on the shoulder.

  17. Jim Nald 17

    Tune in to watch statesmanship being reduced to entertainment.

  18. Blue 18

    “I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking that trying to be cool by being photographed with a popular actor will endear you to the folks back home who’ve just realised that you’re a charlatan. You’re thinking that, failing that, it will at least be another snap to add to your ‘famous people I’ve been photographed with’ scrapbook from your days as PM. You’re thinking how Hawaii is so close you can almost taste it. You can taste it, John. Just give in and feel the pull of golf courses and sunshine, and revel in your minor celebrity status as a former PM of a tiny country at the bottom of the world. We live on Planet Key.”

  19. fabregas4 20

    The Mentalist and the Mental.

  20. shorts 21

    aside:

    I can’t or don’t understand why JohnKeyPM was tweeting about dinner with Jim Cameron (other than the rather sad look at how cool am am motives – how old is he, 12?)

    “John Key ‏@johnkeypm
    With Director Jim Cameron and Producer Jon Landau, who have hosted dinner for me in LA. pic.twitter.com/DyfvVHTk”

    It’s James as far as I can tell – except on twitter where James tweets as Jim

    https://twitter.com/JimCameron

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Cameron

    I imagine the GCSB briefed him on such matters?

    hope he didn’t start dinner with “Gidday Jim”…. or Hekia Parata might give him a talking to about common courtesy

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/politics/news/article.cfm?c_id=280&objectid=10838208

    its all rather confusing really

    • Lightly 21.1

      it’s to suggest that he is really close friends with Cameron, so knows him by his intimate diminutive – just like Spock called Kirk ‘Jim’

  21. Roy 22

    Kiwi fool meets Aussie cool.

  22. tracey 23

    I thought it was the guy from honey i shrunk the kids… So nearly typed my caption

    Honey, i shrunk the economy, but made friends with celebrities.

    This kind of junket and time wasting by our leader is more than a shame its a slap in the face for all kiwis

  23. Tom Gould 24

    “Having lost his own ability to recall, Key went to an expert to find out what he was thinking.”

  24. Dr Terry 25

    How disengaged the actor looks! Why Key’s vacuous smile – usually that signals another lie coming on!

  25. Tel 26

    Incompetence meets faux investigator… while actor looks on

  26. I can’t wait to tell him about my movie idea ….

    L8r ….
    (*squirmy-leggy-thing*) You probably know this already but ….
    “It all started in a land far far away …….”

  27. Jokerman 28

    Butcher, Baker…

  28. Jokerman 29

    The Kansas City Shuffle/s next to Mr Goodkat
    (The Wrong Man)

  29. Jokerman 30

    I’m in tight with a demon called Deception
    It’s alright he’s a treatin me quite well
    I’m in tight with a demon called Deception
    He’s a right besides me when I fail.

    -Grant Lee Buffalo

    (too easy, John, more creative than a cross word)

    dedicated to Eddie 🙂

  30. Craig Glen Eden 31

    Hi I am Simon Baker an actor who pretends to read peoples minds.

    Hi Im John Key I pretend to be a prime minister and I keep loosing my mind.

  31. Craig Glen Eden 32

    Perhaps someone should introduce Key to the actor off Unforgotten it might help.

  32. Treetop 33

    One of these has the capacity to retain what they read for the next show, the other one does not.
    No wonder Key has had to meet with GCSB 15 times this year because he keeps forgetting why he meets with the GCSB.

  33. tracey 34

    Of all the things i’ve lost i miss my mind the most

  34. willie maley 35

    *smiles* Bollox I hope this guy doesn’t decide to live in NZ and then get caught up in some sort of scandal, nobody will believe it when I deny all knowledge of his existence. *smiles*

    • Must remember to ask about that “Amnesia Syrum In the Water supply” gambit. *smiles*
      Bloody worked for me *smiles*
      What’d they say again not more than once a month? …. or was it once a day?
      Can you read bud, *holds-up-medicinal-bottle* …. what are the warnings again?

  35. her 36

    Who is the mentalist?

  36. And…. the subject of Dotcom was raised “in passing” at the dinner party John Landau and James (Jim for John) Cameron threw for John Key.

    Here is my version of how it went
     

  37. Armchair Critic 38

    “Pleased to meet you, I’d shake your hand, but Richie McCaw isn’t here.”

  38. Policy Parrot 39

    They’re thinking the same way. We live your world. ANZ.

  39. The Woodpecker 40

    Your thinking.. if you had been sucessfull getting Kim Dotcom extradited you would be standing next to Tom Cruise instead of me.

  40. tc 41

    Yeah I know, awkward eh but the folks back home lap up any shit I get up to, thanks mate you were oarsum in doctor who.

  41. captain hook 42

    the Menatalist: “who is this guy?”

  42. irascible 43

    “Is this a cardboard cutout of a suit I see beside me?”

  43. Wolfslair 44

    “So ah John is this your first psychosis? I didn’t realize you kiwis were so far behind the times.”

  44. rod 45

    Sorry, what’s your name again? my memory is not too good.

  45. Phil 46

    Du yu think this suit fits me properly? Wut about the arms, bit short yu thunk?
    Wut about the tie? Goes with the suit?
    Wut if I keep the smile goin? Wutcha think eh?
    Please be my friend, I’ve got no friends, I forgot thim all……..
    Can I hive a job soon?

  46. fender 47

    I’ll be standing at attention plenty on this trip to Hollywood, hope I don’t lose the memory stick.

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    Last Friday, almost six weeks after election day, National finally came to an agreement with ACT and NZ First to form a government. They also released the agreements between each party and looking through them, here are the things I thought were the most interesting (and often concerning) from the. ...
    4 days ago
  • How many smokers will die to fund the tax cuts?
    Maori and Pasifika smoking rates are already over twice the ‘all adult’ rate. Now the revenue that generates will be used to fund National’s tax cuts. Photo: Getty ImagesTL;DR: The devil is always in the detail and it emerged over the weekend from the guts of the policy agreements National ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • How the culture will change in the Beehive
    Perhaps the biggest change that will come to the Beehive as the new government settles in will be a fundamental culture change. The era of endless consultation will be over. This looks like a government that knows what it wants to do, and that means it knows what outcomes ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    4 days ago
  • No More Winnie Blues.
    So what do you think of the coalition’s decision to cancel Smokefree measures intended to stop young people, including an over representation of Māori, from taking up smoking? Enabling them to use the tax revenue to give other people a tax cut?David Cormack summed it up well:It seems not only ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    5 days ago
  • 2023 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #47
    A chronological listing of news and opinion articles posted on the Skeptical Science  Facebook Page during the past week: Sun, Nov 19, 2023 thru Sat, Nov 25, 2023.  Story of the Week World stands on frontline of disaster at Cop28, says UN climate chief  Exclusive: Simon Stiell says leaders must ‘stop ...
    5 days ago
  • Some of it is mad, some of it is bad and some of it is clearly the work of people who are dangerous ...
    On announcement morning my mate texted:Typical of this cut-price, fake-deal government to announce itself on Black Friday.What a deal. We lose Kim Hill, we gain an empty, jargonising prime minister, a belligerent conspiracist, and a heartless Ayn Rand fanboy. One door closes, another gets slammed repeatedly in your face.It seems pretty ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    5 days ago
  • “Revolution” is the threat as the Māori Party smarts at coalition government’s Treaty directi...
    Buzz from the Beehive Having found no fresh announcements on the government’s official website, Point of Order turned today to Scoop’s Latest Parliament Headlines  for its buzz. This provided us with evidence that the Māori Party has been soured by the the coalition agreement announced yesterday by the new PM. “Soured” ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago
  • The Good, the Bad, and the even Worse.
    Yesterday the trio that will lead our country unveiled their vision for New Zealand.Seymour looking surprisingly statesmanlike, refusing to rise to barbs about his previous comments on Winston Peters. Almost as if they had just been slapstick for the crowd.Winston was mostly focussed on settling scores with the media, making ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    6 days ago
  • When it Comes to Palestine – Free Speech is Under Threat
    Hi,Thanks for getting amongst Mister Organ on digital — thanks to you, we hit the #1 doc spot on iTunes this week. This response goes a long way to helping us break even.I feel good about that. Other things — not so much.New Zealand finally has a new government, and ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    6 days ago
  • Thank you Captain Luxon. Was that a landing, or were we shot down?
    Hello! Here comes the Saturday edition of More Than A Feilding, catching you up on the past week’s editions.Also in More Than A FeildingFriday The unboxing And so this is Friday and what have we gone and done to ourselves?In the same way that a Christmas present can look lovely under the ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    6 days ago
  • Cans of Worms.
    “And there’ll be no shortage of ‘events’ to test Luxon’s political skills. David Seymour wants a referendum on the Treaty. Winston wants a Royal Commission of Inquiry into Labour’s handling of the Covid crisis. Talk about cans of worms!”LAURIE AND LES were very fond of their local. It was nothing ...
    6 days ago
  • Disinformation campaigns are undermining democracy. Here’s how we can fight back
    This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article. Misinformation is debated everywhere and has justifiably sparked concerns. It can polarise the public, reduce health-protective behaviours such as mask wearing and vaccination, and erode trust in science. Much of misinformation is spread not ...
    6 days ago
  • Peters as Minister
    A previous column looked at Winston Peters biographically. This one takes a closer look at his record as a minister, especially his policy record.1990-1991: Minister of Māori Affairs. Few remember Ka Awatea as a major document on the future of Māori policy; there is not even an entry in Wikipedia. ...
    PunditBy Brian Easton
    7 days ago
  • The New Government: 2023 Edition
    So New Zealand has a brand-spanking new right-wing government. Not just any new government either. A formal majority coalition, of the sort last seen in 1996-1998 (our governmental arrangements for the past quarter of a century have been varying flavours of minority coalition or single-party minority, with great emphasis ...
    7 days ago
  • The unboxing
    And so this is Friday and what have we gone and done to ourselves?In the same way that a Christmas present can look lovely under the tree with its gold ribbon but can turn out to be nothing more than a big box holding a voucher for socks, so it ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    7 days ago
  • A cruel, vicious, nasty government
    So, after weeks of negotiations, we finally have a government, with a three-party cabinet and a time-sharing deputy PM arrangement. Newsroom's Marc Daalder has put the various coalition documents online, and I've been reading through them. A few things stand out: Luxon doesn't want to do any work, ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    7 days ago
  • Hurrah – we have a new government (National, ACT and New Zealand First commit “to deliver for al...
    Buzz from the Beehive Sorry, there has been  no fresh news on the government’s official website since the caretaker trade minister’s press statement about the European Parliament vote on the NZ-EU Free Trade Agreement. But the capital is abuzz with news – and media comment is quickly flowing – after ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    7 days ago
  • Christopher Luxon – NZ PM #42.
    Nothing says strong and stable like having your government announcement delayed by a day because one of your deputies wants to remind everyone, but mostly you, who wears the trousers. It was all a bit embarrassing yesterday with the parties descending on Wellington before pulling out of proceedings. There are ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    1 week ago
  • Coalition Government details policies & ministers
    Winston Peters will be Deputy PM for the first half of the Coalition Government’s three-year term, with David Seymour being Deputy PM for the second half. Photo montage by Lynn Grieveson for The KākāTL;DR: PM-Elect Christopher Luxon has announced the formation of a joint National-ACT-NZ First coalition Government with a ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    1 week ago
  • “Old Coat” by Peter, Paul & Mary.
     THERE ARE SOME SONGS that seem to come from a place that is at once in and out of the world. Written by men and women who, for a brief moment, are granted access to that strange, collective compendium of human experience that comes from, and belongs to, all the ...
    1 week ago
  • Weekly Roundup 23-November-2023
    It’s Friday again! Maybe today we’ll finally have a government again. Roll into the weekend with some of the articles that caught our attention this week. And as always, feel free to add your links and observations in the comments. This Week in Greater Auckland On Monday Matt ...
    Greater AucklandBy Greater Auckland
    1 week ago
  • Geoffrey Miller: New Zealand’s strategy for COP28 in Dubai
    The COP28 countdown is on. Over 100 world leaders are expected to attend this year’s UN Climate Change Conference in in the United Arab Emirates (UAE), which starts next Thursday. Among the VIPs confirmed for the Dubai summit are the UK’s Rishi Sunak and Brazil’s Lula da Silva – along ...
    Democracy ProjectBy Geoffrey Miller
    1 week ago

  • New Zealand welcomes European Parliament vote on the NZ-EU Free Trade Agreement
    A significant milestone in ratifying the NZ-EU Free Trade Agreement (FTA) was reached last night, with 524 of the 705 member European Parliament voting in favour to approve the agreement. “I’m delighted to hear of the successful vote to approve the NZ-EU FTA in the European Parliament overnight. This is ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Further humanitarian support for Gaza, the West Bank and Israel
    The Government is contributing a further $5 million to support the response to urgent humanitarian needs in Gaza, the West Bank and Israel, bringing New Zealand’s total contribution to the humanitarian response so far to $10 million. “New Zealand is deeply saddened by the loss of civilian life and the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago

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