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Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 3:08 pm, December 19th, 2014 - 67 comments
Categories: caption contest - Tags:

John Key not sorry for being a man

Keep it seemly …

67 comments on “Caption contest”

  1. karol 1

    In fact, I’m not sorry for anything. I never apologise, except to Cameron Slater.

  2. mickysavage 2

    But I am sorry for upsetting Cameron …

  3. tristan 3

    One of these people really has issues with apologies

  4. ianmac 4

    “I’m not sorry for being a tricky man, but I oughta be!”

    (Who is she?)

  5. McFlock 5

    Petulant child refuses to apologise for being a man.

  6. KJS0ne 6

    Our elder statesman in all his eminence and virtue.

  7. karol 7

    John Key and his rock star economy circa 2021

    Once upon a time you dressed so fine
    Threw the bums a dime in your prime, didn’t you?
    People call say ‘beware doll, you’re bound to fall’
    You thought they were all kidding you
    You used to laugh about
    Everybody that was hanging out
    Now you don’t talk so loud
    Now you don’t seem so proud
    About having to be scrounging your next meal

    How does it feel, how does it feel?
    To be without a home
    Like a complete unknown, like a rolling stone

  8. irascible 9

    Two inflatable egoes frame one inflatable “politician”.

  9. ruup 10

    Just a sorry excuse of a man….

  10. Crap djs suck up to a crap pm wearing a crap tee shirt holding a crap cd.

  11. Tel 12

    I’m just sorry our PM is not Idris Elba, then there’s a chance that t-shirt might look cool, but on John-boy it just looks kinda sad.

  12. Paul 13

    The Edge.
    Training kids to be Tories since 1994.

  13. PhiDC 14

    Buy one Good times CD get a free teeshirt, this product set comes complete with gormless manipulative corporate lacky. (privatised power sources not included)

  14. Capn Insano 15

    The Edge, where lack of musical taste meets lack of decency.

  15. “For not being sorry for being a man I get to be hooker1”

  16. greywarshark 17

    That short tshirt guy in the middle, that’s such a cliche about being a man and true to type, he’s found a shorter woman friend. It’s well known, short men always have to boast and boost themselves next to someone taller with muscles.

  17. Paul 19

    Radio Sport.
    As obsequious and owned as the Edge.
    A snivelling interview with Key.

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/sport/news/video.cfm?c_id=1503077&gal_cid=1503077&gallery_id=147363

  18. tricle up 20

    Left to right the reference is to music john must be the odd one out.

  19. felix 21

    “I’m not sorry Tania Billingsly was denied justice, even though I promised I’d apologise to her. At the end of the day she was probably asking for it”.

  20. BassGuy 22

    “I’m not sorry for being a man, because being a man means facing up to my responsibilities.”

  21. Clemgeopin 23

    “I am not sorry, but very proud indeed, that I have managed to fool the trusting people of this country hook, line and sinker!”

  22. miravox 24

    As he took his usual place in the centre of things, he had an unusual flash of self-awareness and realised he looked more like a fool than a man but forced a smile anyway.

    • Rodel 24.1

      miravox- not exactly a caption but the best Gary Larson type summation I’ve seen so far.
      Dear god what a foolish looking man..actually all three look cringeful and embarrassed at their stupidness..

  23. subharmonicFrequency 25

    Mike Brandt (pictured left) and Kelly Pulson (pictured right), took this photo opportunity with Dohn Key (pictured centre) at the album release party of ‘I Love this Orange Flower’ by the duo – Kim Dot-Com and Dohn Key.
    The album contains the number one hit of 2014 “I’m NOT Sorry for being a Man” exclusively written and recorded by Kim Dot-Com and Dohn Key.
    There was controversy about copyright infringement with apparently parts of the song being extracted from an Eminem song. Dohn Key was questioned with regard to the allegation with which Dohn Key replied “To be honest, I don’t remember”.
    Eminem was satisfied with Dohn Keys response and has dropped the charge against Dohn Key.

    Dohn Key has informed us he will be releasing another album in early 2015 titled “Got ya by the Balls” with a follow up one titled “Gi Me Ya Land & Resources”, then another titled “Give it to the Empire”

    Some of his past number one singles were “I’ll make ya rich”, “Trust Me”, “Turn Around”, “I’m the Saviour”, “Got ya Back” and “Slavery is Freedom”.

    • greywarshark 25.1

      @ subharmonicFrequency
      [Dohn Key plans] another album in early 2015 titled “Got ya by the Balls” with a follow up one titled “Gi Me Ya Land & Resources”, then another titled “Give it to the Empire”

      Dohn Key has been very affected by the theme of the Star Wars Empire and sees himself in the nature of a leader palpitating sufficiently to reprise Palpatine’s Empire.

      The Galactic Empire, also known as the New Order, the Old Empire, the First Galactic Empire, Palpatine’s New Order, the Imperium or simply the Empire,

      “We are an Empire ruled by the majority! An Empire ruled by a new Constitution! An Empire of laws, not of politicians! An Empire devoted to the preservation of a just society. Of a safe and secure society! We are an Empire that will stand for ten thousand years!”
      ―Palpatine[src]

      http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Galactic_Empire

      Dohn Key is careful to present and dress himself as a man of the people, but he surrounds himself with followers dress in black, which is an unacknowledged affiliating uniform for his mercenaries who are under direct control of the black-clad figure of Girth Vader (called Great Father by the footsoldiers.)

      Those watching Dohn Key and fearing his ambitions have a uniting slogan –
      Help me, Obi-Wan. You’re my only hope! They are also working with scientists on creating a holographic image called Leia holo which can be used for instant personal communication and encouragement for the anti Dohn Key faction who object to him and his plans for an evil Empire.
      http://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/mar/20/princess-leia-hologram-3d-display

  24. Maui 26

    NewstalkZB welcomes it’s newest talkback host and spin-doctor.. the PM! “Helping to keep Corporate control of New Zealand since who knows when..”

  25. the pigman 27

    Flabby gut and saggy man-tits distort text on cheap-looking, poorly-printed, tasteless skivvy.

  26. Murray Rawshark 28

    I made a comment on Facebook about this post, which lprent would possibly delete from here. It was something about whether Key let the DJs use a part of their anatomies containing teeth to do something to a part of his anatomy which has no teeth at all. Best not to repeat it here, but the way they lick a certain part of him made me sick.

  27. adam 29

    God I love our corporatocracy.

  28. RedLogix 30

    I cannot think of anything even slightly funny to say about this.

    My partner says it’s a shame we have such a dickwad for a Prime Minister.

    (Surely to god this is photoshopped – someone tell me.)

  29. b waghorn 31

    I’m sorry he’s our prime minister

  30. locus 32

    said between gritted teeth:

    “how long do I hack to hold this ducking snile lynton”

  31. ankerawshark 33

    “I am not sorry for being a man”

    http://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/celebrities/64350700/john-key-schmoozes-with-katy-perry

    Sexist ageing old git politician makes a dick of himself with a 20 something pop star

  32. Ecosse_Maidy 34

    Time had finally caught up with Keith Richards as was shown as he posed with fans for a photo

  33. Ecosse_Maidy 35

    Fella on right, shows off John Keys selection for the new flag…..

  34. Ecosse_Maidy 36

    John Keys, in promo event, aka donations to his pension fund, the launch of his CD…..called tales from the tea shop…..tracks include fully redacted tea shop talk, solos from Pete George and kareoke out takes from Paula Bennett and winzs slaves

  35. Ecosse_Maidy 37

    Keys Geldorf launches Nat Aid CD, all donations to Banksters in Distress…..Feed The Rich.

  36. Ecosse_Maidy 38

    On my count,,,,,,,crouchhhhhh,,,, touchhhhhhh,,,,,,,,,,raiseeeeeeeeeeeee taxes!

  37. greywarshark 39

    Ecosse Maidy
    Another good selection.

  38. Andrea 40

    Is that a T-shirt? Or a mini-skirt?

    Not quite long enough to cover a multitude of venal sins…

  39. JanM 41

    Most of our species exhibits are easily identifiable but we thought perhaps we needed to label this one

  40. Clemgeopin 42

    See, I pose with some common underclass too!

  41. key:..

    ‘..i found him in a bath-house in washington..cute..!..isn’t he..?’

    (but seriously..who on earth are those two people with key..?

    ..i wouldn’t have a clue who they are..

    ..is one a rolling stones roadie..?..or just some wanker who bought a t-shirt..?..)

    • b waghorn 43.1

      Dom and JJ from the edge radio station

      • phillip ure 43.1.1

        which is which..?

        ..and why do they have names like that.?

        ..is it really frank and mary..?

        ..is it called ‘the edge’ because it is ‘edgy’..?

        ..or because it is way out on ‘the edge’ of good taste..?

        (i mean..look who they hang out with..!…guilt by association..and all that..)

        ..which is it..?..if not/neither..what does it mean..?

        ..so many questions for our resident ‘edge/j.j./dom’-expert..

        • Paul 43.1.1.1

          The Edge is a dreadful radio station that, behind the crap music it plays, trains young teens to be self-centred neoliberal consumers.
          The DJs are both around 40 and try to behave cool by acting like they are 14.
          They invite Key on every Xmas and fawn all over him.
          It’s best not to listen to the station.

          • phillip ure 43.1.1.1.1

            thanks 4 the warning..i suspected as much..

            ..my radio-listening arc has been bfm to national radio..

            ..i can’t listen to that commercial-crap..

            ..all those screaming/crap/witless ads…

            ..all that d.j-babble..that mindless d.j/radio-personality ‘babble’..

            ..and as you mentioned ‘crap music’..

            ..and how well insulated am i..!..i have never/ever heard a song from ‘frozen’..

            ..wouldn’t know one if i fell over it..

            ..aren’t i lucky..?..

  42. Jason 44

    Inhuman Monster Revealed!
    In a stunning move, Prime Minister John Key opted to use the novel medium of a tee-shirt to finally reveal his true non-human nature. Having successfully posed as a bona fide male Homo sapiens for his entire time on Earth, Key used the finely wrought words crafted by Crosby Textor to announce his true alien nature. The spin doctored message was actually the gentlest way to tell hardworking Kiwis the truth he said. “I’m totally comfortable with being New Zealand’s first alien PM”, he added.

  43. Murray Simmonds 45

    Seems to have been a typo on the shirt . . . Isn’t it supposed to read “I’m sorry for NOT being a man”?

  44. Atiawa 46

    “Hey you three, cut the crap”.

  45. Gruntie 47

    “only real men apologise”

  46. Pat O'Dea 48

    “I’m not sorry for being inhuman”

    There, fixed it.

  47. fender 49

    “Im not sorry for being a man, because despite appearances I’m still a boy”

  48. The Keymaster is here to unlock the potential of NZ: by pillaging virgin territory in the national interest. Screw the gatekeepers, and never apologise.

  49. averyold pakeha 51

    Is that idiot in the middle a PM Jez get him out of here
    Or I will fire him

  50. averyold pakeha 52

    Is that idiot in the middle a PM Jez get him out of here
    Or I will fire him

  51. e-clectic 53

    There is no depression in New Zealand;
    there are no sheep on our farms,
    There is no depression in New Zealand;
    we can all keep perfectly calm,

    Everybody’s talking about World War Three;
    everybody’s talking about World War Three,
    But we’re as safe as safe can be,
    there’s no unrest in this country
    We have no dole queues,
    we have no drug addicts,
    we have no racism,
    we have no sexism, sexism, no, no

    There is no depression in New Zealand;
    there are no teeth in our heads
    There is no depression in New Zealand;
    we sleep in a well made bed
    Oh but everybody’s talking about World War Three,
    yes everybody’s talking about World War Three,
    But we’re as safe as safe can be,
    there’s no unrest in this country
    We have no SIS,
    we have no secrets,
    we have no rebellion;
    we have no valium, valium, no, no

    There is no depression in New Zealand;
    there are no sheep on our farms,
    There is no depression in New Zealand;
    oh we can all keep perfectly calm,
    perfectly calm,
    perfectly calm,
    perfectly calm,
    perfectly calm…

  52. e-clectic 54

    We have maintained a silence closely resembling stupidity.

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