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Dim-Post: Electoral Commission to offer suicide voting booths

Written By: - Date published: 9:00 am, April 17th, 2011 - 4 comments
Categories: election 2011, Satire - Tags:

The Electoral Commission will give New Zealanders voting in the November General Election the option to take their own lives rather than live in a country run by any of the possible governing coalitions, the chair of the Commission Sir Hugh Williams announced today.

‘It is the role of the Commission to be responsive to the voters of New Zealand’, Sir Hugh said in a press statement posted to the Commission’s web site. ‘After extensive debate and public consultation we have determined that what voters want most is to not be alive when the country is run by either a majority National, National and Maori Party, or Labour and New Zealand First government.’

Although details on the means of suicide are yet to be formalised, the Commissioner made an assurance that New Zealanders will have several options available to them. ‘In this, at least, they will have dignity and choice,’ he said.

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Ouch! The rest of Danyl’s hilarious post over at Dim-Post.

4 comments on “Dim-Post: Electoral Commission to offer suicide voting booths ”

  1. lprent 1

    That is hilarious…. Thank you whoever put that up. I missed it at Dimpost.

    The Commission will run a media campaign across print, broadcast and online media to inform voters of their options, featuring the slogan: ‘Election 2011: The living will envy the dead – and you can be one of them!’

    Priceless…

  2. Bill 2

    And in one short day the unemployment ‘problem’ in NZ is ‘fixed’ with a cunning two pronged strategy.
    Dead people don’t need material support and the remainder of the living can be gainfully employed burying them.

  3. toad 3

    The solution is to vote Green – then no-one will have to top themselves.
     
    In a later post (I love Lenin’s title he’s given it), Danyl is actually advocating that –  although unfortunately not that strongly.

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