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Fruukd: New Media Venture

Written By: - Date published: 11:22 am, April 1st, 2015 - 15 comments
Categories: Satire - Tags: ,

Media release from The Standarista Collective
1st April 2015

The Standardista Collective today announced plans for a massive new media venture, Fruukd. “This analogue-digital-quantum platform will take social media, big data, ultra-fast broadband and Web 3.0 to new levels of excellence in the production and dissemination of personalised responsive real-time news-like content substitute.” Our motto “I can’t believe it’s not news!”

“In partnership with the GCSB we will be delivering targeted advertising with a precision that you simply will not believe.” “No really – you won’t believe it” said a spokesperson.

“And unlike certain other non-existant media ventures we could name, our drones will be fully armed.”

Fruukd will be launching any day now. Real soon. Honest.

15 comments on “Fruukd: New Media Venture ”

  1. weka 1

    Sounds fabulous! Just so long as the commenters get a way of voting for most popular post and most popular comment to a higher status, and then a way of voting worst commenter and worst author off the blog. Maybe at the end of each week. Plus a range of new flashing shorthand expressive smilies so we don’t have to type so much or bother listening to each other. Can’t leave us lot behind, we feed the beast.

    • Jones 1.1

      The drones could take care of the worst authors and commenters… oh sh*t! INCOMING…!!!

  2. infused 2

    bit late…

  3. Tracey 3

    I’m pretty relaxed about the launch to be honest.

  4. Sacha 4

    I just can’t wait for the cat videos, racist jokes and other useful material!

  5. mikesh 5

    Interesting that the announcement was made on April 1st.

  6. Rob 6

    Wouldn’t the better brand just be ‘Fuukd’?

  7. One Anonymous Bloke 7

    It isn’t nice to mock people with head injuries 😈

  8. philj 8

    As long as Jim Mora, Mike H, and Paul H are not on it, it’s gotta be better than what we have now. 😉

  9. Instauration 9

    He who flys Tony’s Piper calls the Cherokee tune.

  10. Instauration 10

    “We’ve done interviews.We loved who we’ve seen We’re not quite finished with that process”

    They did not advertise a PR role. So who does that for them ?

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