web analytics

Key cheated of his rightful victory!

Written By: - Date published: 4:02 pm, May 8th, 2013 - 35 comments
Categories: humour, International, Media, Minister for International Embarrassment - Tags:

We don’t often take Key’s side here at The Standard, but I think that most of us here would agree that on this occasion John Key has been cheated out of a victory that was rightfully his:

John Key third on ‘most ridiculous world leader’ list

key-3-way-handhakePrime Minister John Key has taken out third place in BuzzFeed’s list of 15 Most Ridiculous World Leaders of All Time.

BuzzFeed placed Key in third place on the list behind Boris Johnson the Mayor of London and Mayor Stubbs the Mayor of Talkeetna, Alaska.

Key gets points for thinking that a three way handshake is somehow possible. The unusual handshake took place between All Black captain Richie McCaw and International Rugby Board chairman Bernard Lapasset at the 2011 Rugby World Cup celebrations. [Watch it here]

The glory-hogging handshake is just one small act in John Key’s circus of embarrassments. There is so much less to Key than there seems. By all rights he should have won a clear first place on the Buzzfeed list. You’ll show them next year John!

35 comments on “Key cheated of his rightful victory! ”

  1. Populuxe1 1

    I think you really are underestimating how ridiculous and embarassing Boris Johnson is. He isn’t even able to hide the fact that he’s a buffoon. Key is at least able to manage a certain slickness until he cracks.

  2. Hayden 2

    How about a list?

    1: Delivering a few weak jokes on Letterman, not even making it to the couch.

    • Enough is Enough 2.1

      2. Planking

    • BLiP 2.2

      Oooh . . . what fun. I love lists.

      1: Delivering a few weak jokes on Letterman, not even making it to the couch.

      2: Planking

      3: Falling off the stage and breaking his wrist at a Chinese New Year celebration

      4: Making cannibal jokes when talking about the Tuhoe

      5: Slobbering over Liz Hurley

      6: Calling his own staff a bunch of muppets

      7: describing his wife as a Hobbit

      8: redefining a Prime Minister’s contribution to social media – http://www.listener.co.nz/commentary/the-internaut/john-keys-three-greatest-social-media-photographs/

      • felix 2.2.1

        9. Prime Mincing

      • TheContrarian 2.2.2

        “3: Falling off the stage and breaking his wrist at a Chinese New Year celebration”

        To his credit though he continued business with a broken arm, not wrist. Must of hurt like hell

        • felix 2.2.2.1

          Yeah that’s actually pretty cool. Probably didn’t hurt that much until he sobered up though.

          • TheContrarian 2.2.2.1.1

            Of course he was drunk. It must be true because you asserted it without evidence.

            • felix 2.2.2.1.1.1

              Of course he wasn’t drunk. He never is.

              • Colonial Viper

                Uh felix, I’m not entirely sure you realise what you did there, you asserted without any evidence that Key is never drunk…

                which according to the Contrarian means that Key must ALWAYS be drunk

                😈

              • TheContrarian

                Felix said it, I believe it, that settles it.

                Pffft, so called “evidence” and “proof” can suck my dick.

    • Enough is Enough 2.3

      3. Gangnam on the Edge

  3. infused 3

    Isn’t it funny how you remember all this? Good marketing eh.

    • One Anonymous Knucklehead 3.1

      Yep, that’s exactly what it is. Vacuous to a fault.

    • BLiP 3.2

      Well, its certainly a parade of distractions from the fact that John Key has opened the back door to the New Zealand economy for his bankster mates.

    • emergency mike 3.3

      Yeah we’ve noticed that John Key is a snakey conman because of… ‘marketing’.

      Please, no marketing team could keep up with his constant stream of brain-fades, arrogance, and above listed alarming concept of appropriate behaviour in social situations outside of backroom deals with slimy rich pricks.

    • QoT 3.4

      Ah, you’re one of those adolescent males who still thinks all attention is good attention.

      • Colonial Viper 3.4.1

        ooooohh!!! That girl actually scowled at me!!!!! I’M COOOOOOOOL

    • infused 3.5

      God I love this place 😀

  4. Blue 4

    Yet he’s still more popular than any person the left can get up their hind legs. Sad that even in the face of, in your opinion, such a terrible man, the policies of the left still fail to resonate.

    • Jackal 4.1

      I mainly put that down to a biased media rather than there being anything intrinsically wrong with the policies themselves.

      Today for instance it was revealed that 327,000 false applications were made to purchase Mighty River Power shares. This revelation has been met with very little media coverage. However yesterday it was revealed that there were 100,000 illegitimate signatures on the asset sales petition, and didn’t we hear all about it?

      John Key even said Labour and the Greens had misled the public over the petition and should accept defeat and give up on it. This despite the right wing claiming they have a mandate to sell because of the amount of interest that was registered in MRP shares outnumbering signatures gathered in a petition against privatisation.

      ‘ASSET SALES PETITION FAILS’ read the headlines, when the truth of the matter is that there’s two months to get another 16,500 legitimate signatures, and no more time left to ensure MRP receives a good price. In contrast the MSM is reporting on the MRP share price, and very little else.

      As an aside, the amount of legitimate signatures on the stop the asset sales petition is 292,000 compared to the 113,000 who ended up buying shares in MRP. 61% more people so far have signed the petition than bought shares.

      Contrast that 25% declined signatures on the petition with the almost 74% fake MRP registrations, and the subsequent amount of media coverage each issue has received… Then tell me the MSM isn’t biased?

      • Blue 4.1.1

        Yes yes it’s all about bias, that old leftie chestnut. The media world is against you. There, there. But do remember signing a petition is free, buying shares costs money. It certainly cost me. There is no return on a pointless petition that try’s to deny a democratic mandate.

        • Jackal 4.1.1.1

          Ha! It was the right wing that was claiming they had a mandate because there was apparently more interest in MRP shares than the petition. Now you’re saying that’s not the case because of the money it costs to buy shares?

          The mandate issue hasn’t been resolves despite many years of debate. However I would say this… National has the support of only 24% of New Zealanders when the asset sales will adversely affect many generations to come. Let’s see if they really do have a mandate to sell our assets by having a referendum.

          You’re wrong on another point as well blue… There is a return from the petition if it causes a referendum to be held that will assuredly confirm a large majority of New Zealand voters don’t want those assets partially privatised. The return is in the form of lower power prices… Not to mention securing government revenue to ensure that taxes don’t have to be increased to cover the shortfall.

          The return is also in the form of National looking bad if they don’t allow the democratic process of a referendum to go ahead. Be assured that any media bias that exists won’t be able to protect the right wing from the ensuing political fallout from such a stupid decision.

  5. peggity gwes 5

    ha ha John Key what a card !

  6. BrucetheMoose 6

    If George Bush Jnr was still about he would have challenged Key for third surely.

    • freedom 6.1

      Brucethe Moose, you saw it was Of All Time, right?
      Of All Time

      The Bush family may be hard drinking coke snorting thigh slapping warmongering bloodthirsty drug peddling harbingers of doom, but in the high stakes game of Ridiculous World Leader, they have nothing on John Key

  7. felix 7

    In case you don’t know, and you were thinking 3rd ain’t that bad, 2nd place winner Mayor Stubbs of Talkeetna, Alaska, is a cat.

    Just to put in in perspective.

  8. Chris 8

    To be honest I think a list with Key at number three yet without Silvio Burlusconi anywhere in the top 15 does not deserve to be taken seriously.

  9. joe90 9

    Toronto mayor Rob Ford has sizeable hate club.

    http://fuckrobford.blogspot.co.uk/

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • COVID-19 vaccine slated for possible approval next week
    The green light for New Zealand’s first COVID-19 vaccine could be granted in just over a week, Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern said today. “We’re making swift progress towards vaccinating New Zealanders against the virus, but we’re also absolutely committed to ensuring the vaccines are safe and effective,” Jacinda Ardern said. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 hours ago
  • New ACC Board members announced.
    The Minister for ACC is pleased to announce the appointment of three new members to join the Board of ACC on 1 February 2021. “All three bring diverse skills and experience to provide strong governance oversight to lead the direction of ACC” said Hon Carmel Sepuloni. Bella Takiari-Brame from Hamilton ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 hours ago
  • Economic boost for Southland marae
    The Government is investing $9 million to upgrade a significant community facility in Invercargill, creating economic stimulus and jobs, Infrastructure Minister Grant Robertson and Te Tai Tonga MP Rino Tirikatene have announced.  The grant for Waihƍpai RĆ«naka Inc to make improvements to Murihiku Marae comes from the $3 billion set ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    15 hours ago
  • Celebrating the Entry Into Force of the Treaty on the Prohibition of Nuclear Weapons
    [Opening comments, welcome and thank you to Auckland University etc] It is a great pleasure to be here this afternoon to celebrate such an historic occasion - the entry into force of the Treaty on the Prohibition of Nuclear Weapons. This is a moment many feared would never come, but ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Supporting disabled people to stay connected
    The Government is providing $3 million in one-off seed funding to help disabled people around New Zealand stay connected and access support in their communities, Minister for Disability Issues, Carmel Sepuloni announced today. The funding will allow disability service providers to develop digital and community-based solutions over the next two ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Voluntary saliva testing offered to quarantine workers from Monday
    Border workers in quarantine facilities will be offered voluntary daily COVID-19 saliva tests in addition to their regular weekly testing, COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins said today. This additional option will be rolled out at the Jet Park Quarantine facility in Auckland starting on Monday 25 January, and then to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Next steps in firearms buy-back
    The next steps in the Government’s ambitious firearms reform programme to include a three-month buy-back have been announced by Police Minister Poto Williams today.  “The last buy-back and amnesty was unprecedented for New Zealand and was successful in collecting 60,297 firearms, modifying a further 5,630 firearms, and collecting 299,837 prohibited ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Jobs for Nature projects target iconic ecosystems
    Upscaling work already underway to restore two iconic ecosystems will deliver jobs and a lasting legacy, Conservation Minister Kiri Allan says.  “The Jobs for Nature programme provides $1.25 billion over four years to offer employment opportunities for people whose livelihoods have been impacted by the COVID-19 recession. “Two new projects ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • New Public Housing Plan announced
    The Government has released its Public Housing Plan 2021-2024 which outlines the intention of where 8,000 additional public and transitional housing places announced in Budget 2020, will go. “The Government is committed to continuing its public house build programme at pace and scale. The extra 8,000 homes – 6000 public ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Prime Minister congratulates President Joe Biden on his inauguration
    Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has congratulated President Joe Biden on his inauguration as the 46th President of the United States of America. “I look forward to building a close relationship with President Biden and working with him on issues that matter to both our countries,” Jacinda Ardern said. “New Zealand ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Jobs for Nature funding will create training and employment opportunities
    A major investment to tackle wilding pines in Mt Richmond will create jobs and help protect the area’s unique ecosystems, Biosecurity Minister Damien O’Connor says. The Mt Richmond Forest Park has unique ecosystems developed on mineral-rich geology, including taonga plant species found nowhere else in the country. “These special plant ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Pre-departure testing extended to all passengers to New Zealand
    To further protect New Zealand from COVID-19, the Government is extending pre-departure testing to all passengers to New Zealand except from Australia, Antarctica and most Pacific Islands, COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins said today. “The change will come into force for all flights arriving in New Zealand after 11:59pm (NZT) on Monday ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Bay Cadets learn skills to protect environment
    Bay Conservation Cadets launched with first intake Supported with $3.5 million grant Part of $1.245b Jobs for Nature programme to accelerate recover from Covid Cadets will learn skills to protect and enhance environment Environment Minister David Parker today welcomed the first intake of cadets at the launch of the Bay ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Cook Islanders to resume travel to New Zealand
    The Prime Minister of New Zealand Jacinda Ardern and the Prime Minister of the Cook Islands Mark Brown have announced passengers from the Cook Islands can resume quarantine-free travel into New Zealand from 21 January, enabling access to essential services such as health. “Following confirmation of the Cook Islands’ COVID ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Supporting communities and landowners to grow employment opportunities
    Jobs for Nature funding is being made available to conservation groups and landowners to employ staff and contractors in a move aimed at boosting local biodiversity-focused projects, Conservation Minister Kiritapu Allan has announced. It is estimated some 400-plus jobs will be created with employment opportunities in ecology, restoration, trapping, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Border exception for some returning international tertiary students
    The Government has approved an exception class for 1000 international tertiary students, degree level and above, who began their study in New Zealand but were caught offshore when border restrictions began. The exception will allow students to return to New Zealand in stages from April 2021. “Our top priority continues ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Tiwai deal gives time for managed transition
    Today’s deal between Meridian and Rio Tinto for the Tiwai smelter to remain open another four years provides time for a managed transition for Southland. “The deal provides welcome certainty to the Southland community by protecting jobs and incomes as the region plans for the future. The Government is committed ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • New member for APEC Business Advisory Council
    Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has appointed Anna Curzon to the APEC Business Advisory Council (ABAC). The leader of each APEC economy appoints three private sector representatives to ABAC. ABAC provides advice to leaders annually on business priorities. “ABAC helps ensure that APEC’s work programme is informed by business community perspectives ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Govt’s careful economic management recognised
    The Government’s prudent fiscal management and strong policy programme in the face of the COVID-19 global pandemic have been acknowledged by the credit rating agency Fitch. Fitch has today affirmed New Zealand’s local currency rating at AA+ with a stable outlook and foreign currency rating at AA with a positive ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Additional actions to keep COVID-19 out of NZ
    The Government is putting in place a suite of additional actions to protect New Zealand from COVID-19, including new emerging variants, COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins said today. “Given the high rates of infection in many countries and evidence of the global spread of more transmissible variants, it’s clear that ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • 19 projects will clean up and protect waterways
    $36 million of Government funding alongside councils and others for 19 projects Investment will clean up and protect waterways and create local jobs Boots on the ground expected in Q2 of 2021 Funding part of the Jobs for Nature policy package A package of 19 projects will help clean up ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago
  • New Zealand Government acknowledges 175th anniversary of Battle of Ruapekapeka
    The commemoration of the 175th anniversary of the Battle of Ruapekapeka represents an opportunity for all New Zealanders to reflect on the role these conflicts have had in creating our modern nation, says Associate Minister for Arts, Culture and Heritage Kiri Allan. “The Battle at Te Ruapekapeka Pā, which took ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago