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Labour’s new online game

Written By: - Date published: 12:09 pm, May 26th, 2011 - 53 comments
Categories: humour, labour, privatisation - Tags:

Labour’s new online game is hilarious. Choose whether or not to take the options presented and see the results. Politics is all about choices 🙂

And, once you’ve played, remember to sign the anti-asset sales petition.

53 comments on “Labour’s new online game”

  1. Lanthanide 1

    I would go with “incredibly strange and weird” rather than “hilarious”.

    The star wars one in particular makes no sense for either result.

  2. Simon Poole 2

    For given values of hilarious, I guess.

    Personally, I found it pretty crap. Humour for 4th formers (not that they’d get half the references anyway) packaged as a political campaign. This just reminds me of the “tax-master general” ad that National ran in ’05. It was lame then, this is lame now.

    I am hoping Labour can do better for the campaign proper – New Zealand deserve it.

    • Blighty 2.1

      It’s an online game, not the centrepiece of their campaign. It’s meant to be fun and it is. Not everyone is like us and wants to engage in lots of serious discourse on political issues. This is a way for Labour to do something that gets their attention.

      • Simon Poole 2.1.1

        I never said it was the centrepiece. I said that I hope Labour can do better once the campaign starts. So far we’ve had stop signs and this, which doesn’t bode terribly well.

        And I don’t think that this is going to get the type of attention Labour want, but that’s just me.

        Finally: For an unthinking machine, THE STANDARD has a terrible sense of humour.

        • lprent

          Has nothing to do with the machine. THE STANDARD is the slightly shortened alias for the user notices and features.

          It is used for putting up posts that none of us authors put any
          original thought into. In other words when we reprint features from other sites or we publish notices.

          I could demonstrate the concept to you of an alias by changing the handle on all of your comments to the the more accurate one of FUCKWIT CRITIC. Do you need the demonstration or do you understand?


          • Jim Nald

            Go on … you know you want to.

            Call a spade, a spade, and that kinda thang, y’know.

            That reminds me. It’s time for another wee donation to The Standard 🙂

            I’ve cancelled all subscriptions to the NZ Herald and Dom Post and can contribute to this site.

            • lprent

              All donations are gratefully accepted. But I tend to reserve that particular tool for the identity hijackers and persistent trolls. If I did it for useless critics then I’d have to work too hard.

          • Simon Poole

            You make your point very clearly and on a very regular basis, Lynn.

            Mine was simply this: You get angry at people referring to “The Standard” as an entity with a sole opinion – and fair enough, you’re not the Borg. However, when a post like this goes up, who do I address? There is no author, yet *someone* thought it was funny. I mention The Standard and you go apeshit. It is your website and you’re welcome to do what you want, but the hyper-aggressive response when I have no one else to address is ridiculous.

            I’ll admit that my first run through was coloured by getting Star Wars, Aliens and Hopoate – even when clicking “lets not” the results were, literally, shit. As a left-leaning member of the voting public I was simply expressing my opinion that I would hope Labour could do better once the campaign began – lord knows New Zealand needs it. This offering is pretty juvenile and I would have hoped for better.

            After clicking through a few times I’ll admit that the Garden of Eden, Trevor v. Tau and Chuck Norris are some of the better offerings.

          • Gotham

            Simon, you were being too kind.

            This game is the lamest thing I have ever seen. Actually, I haven’t really “seen” it, I spent about 15 precious seconds of my life looking at it and then decided that it wasn’t worth the effort.

            Labour GOTTA do better than this.

            • pseudopanax

              I’m still not certain who the game was supposed to appeal to, I had a phallic lightsaber Luke, a gastrointestinally afflicted astronaut, a bikini granny, and some other puerile thing that’s slipped my mind already.

              It was embarassing.

          • Gotham




            What a totally unbecoming over-reaction to someone who was essentially only expressing an opinion about what is, to many many people, a lame, stupid, unimaginative, waste of time “game”.

            You probably needed to have a little sit down before writing a retort to Simon’s comment. You just bombshelled in my personal opinion of you and I won’t be so interested in what you have to say about anything anymore. Prone to exaggeration and inappropriate over-reaction as you have just shown yourself to be.

  3. Colonial Viper 3

    Labour’s putting the party back in Labour Party!

    PS yes I have to say that some of the humour was definitely not my taste. Would not have liked to have had this game released in the last 2-3 months of the campaign, but now its just a bit of fun 🙂

  4. Graeme 4

    so much for the red teams anti violence campaign…..what was the slogan…..Its never ok to use violence….

    and this is the team that would be Govt, what a complete pack of fucking idiots they are

    • Colonial Viper 4.1

      Its never ok to use violence….

      Meh, it’s sometimes OK to use violence. International law says so.

      You’ve mistaken Labour for a bunch of bleeding heart pacifist liberals. We have Mallard on the team for starters, just ask Tau 😀

    • PeteG 4.2

      I thought the violence aspect was poor, the rest was just naff.

      I missed the bit that qualified it as a game.

      • Blighty 4.2.1

        violence aspect?

        If you’re complaining about the Chuck Norris one or the Mallard v Tau one, I recommend you don’t watch anything on TV, even children’s TV. You’re libel to come over all faint.

        • Tigger

          Sorry Pete, didn’t realise you were a pacifist. I’m with Blighty, probably best to shut yourself in a room with no media if you want to avoid any content that might disturb.

      • Blighty 4.2.2

        PeteG. If the ‘violence’ in Labour’s game has you in tears, how do you feel about the rightie game where you can kick Trevor Mallard?

        Surely playing such a game should be illegal, eh Petey?

  5. happynz 5

    …erm…ditch it. No worries, I’ll still vote for my local Labour guy despite this.

  6. Richard 6

    Oh come on, it is quite funny. Especially the Don Brash / Alien bit.
    Lighten up.

    • Lanthanide 6.1

      That bit got a laugh from me, but more of a puzzled/confused/’that was unexpected’ laugh than a ‘wow that was clever and funny’ laugh.

      • Richard 6.1.1

        Actually now that i see more of it, there certainly are a few cringeworthy moments.

  7. Graeme 7

    i am not surprised you sycophants think thats ok.

  8. Graeme 8

    it isnt the violence, its using the image of a govt minister whose govt of the time was running an anti violence programme. said minister was involved in a fight and was convicted for his part in it, now they seek to glorify him as some sort of hero…
    so….is violence ok according to the red team or not??

    [lprent: Can I suggest that you go and ask Trevor Mallard that policy question. After all he is a Labour MP – we are not. I’m sure that he will be kind and considerate to you because I suspect he will think that you may be a congenital fool.

    The site’s posts are written by the people of the left – see the about. We really are uninterested with you displaying your complete lack of knowledge and prejudices about the left or even the Labour party. Persistence in trying to assert directly or indirectly that this site is a mouthpiece for a political party of the left will result in you getting a sanction from the policy.

    BTW: You really are a humorless git. I’d hate to run across you in real life because I’m sure that you could put almost anyone to sleep by droning long and with complete ignorance about things you know nothing about. Are you aware that is how you look here? ]

  9. Graeme 9

    yep, the mighty mallard vanquishing the blue team…..thats exactly what they want their voters to see….

    • wtl 9.1

      All hail the might Mallard. He made Henare, um, disappear! After what looks like a martial arts sparring session…. Yes, very much glorifying violence. /sarc

    • Lanthanide 9.2

      Try clicking on “not” and see them snuggle up together, or something.
      I guess this is part Helen’s homosexual legacies shining through? I don’t know, you’re better at making that short of shit up than I am, I’m sure you can come up with some pseudo-outrage.

  10. joe bloggs 10

    Bottom of barrel – meet scraper.

  11. bobo 11

    Alot of humour police around, its just a light hearted viral which links nicely with the stop asset sales sign campaign. More please.

    • QoT 11.1

      But that’s the whole problem, bobo. It’s designed to be viral. And getting that right is a task that not even really onto-it marketers have managed to master. Trying to engineer a meme like this just isn’t going to resonate with the only demographic who *get* memes – cynical young middle-class types with a lot of time to waste on the internet (proud member here).

      I mean seriously. A Rebecca Black joke? Might have been semi-relevant a month ago …

  12. Graeme 12

    Wow, i touched a raw nerve.
    it must really smart backing a horse thats as lame as the red team.

  13. Gareth 13

    The Greens launched a new little game today too. It ain’t as flash and is a bit old school compared to Labour’s but hopefully you like it: http://www.greens.org.nz/lignite/game

    • TightyRighty 13.1

      seriously? coal tetris?

      or is that the only game the smelly hippys have really caught up with?

      don’t move with the times to fast do you, something to do with your aversion to cars?

      • Lanthanide 13.1.1

        At least it’s actually a game.

        • QoT

          With an actual point, too. Just struck me how trying to meme-ify the phrase “Let’s not” just cements Labour as the “mummy says no” party … *headdesk*

    • Deborah Kean 13.2

      I love it! Tetris is the most addictive game ever, especially for someone with not-very-good sight, like me…

  14. burt 14

    I simply can’t believe that Labour are making a joke out of Mallard fighting with Tau Henare. Ordinary people get fired for throwing their fists around in the workplace but it’s apparently funny when Labour people do it. What a disgrace!

    • Colonial Viper 14.1

      It’s hilarious mate! If you can’t look back and laugh at shit which has gone on before you must be carrying a lot of baggage.

      • burt 14.1.1

        Sure it’s funny in itself. I just don’t think it’s a good look to remind us Hoi Polloi that what we would get fired for they take the piss out of. Plus Trev the Muss beats Tau, I’ve no doubt all Labour lovers would agree but I’m not so sure – go on, tell me that makes it even funnier.

        • Colonial Viper

          Ahem, MPs get fired and reprimanded for a lot of shit that ordinary workers don’t get fired or reprimanded for, so it cuts both ways.

  15. chris73 15

    Its main crime is that it looks cheap and isn’t that funny (apart from the star wars bit)

    • Blighty 15.1

      yeah, they should have forked out more money for a wee online game. Good thinking chris73.

  16. So who was the intermediate school pupil that came up that?

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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Supporting stranded seasonal workers to keep working with more flexible options
    Recognised Seasonal Employers and migrant seasonal workers stranded in New Zealand will be able to continue working and supporting themselves with more flexible hours and roles, says Immigration Minister Iain Lees-Galloway. The time-limited visa changes are: Stranded RSE workers will be able to work part-time (a minimum of 15 hours ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Relief for temporary migrants, employers and New Zealanders who need work
    The Government is making immediate short-term changes to visa settings to support temporary migrants already onshore in New Zealand and their employers, while also ensuring New Zealanders needing work are prioritised, Immigration Minister Iain Lees-Galloway says. We are: Extending temporary work visas due to expire by the end of 2020 ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Freshwater commissioners and fast-track consenting convenor appointed
    Professor Peter Skelton CNZM has been appointed as Chief Freshwater Commissioner and Alternate Environment Court Judge Craig James Thompson as Deputy Chief Freshwater Commissioner for the newly established Freshwater Planning Process (FPP). Environment Minister David Parker today also announced the appointment of Chief Environment Court Judge Laurie Newhook as the ...
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    5 days ago
  • Appointment of Judge of the High Court
    Auckland Queen’s Counsel Neil Campbell has been appointed a Judge of the High Court, Attorney‑General David Parker announced today. Justice Campbell graduated with a BCom and LLB (Hons) from the University of Auckland in 1992. He spent two years with Bell Gully Buddle Weir in Auckland before travelling to the United ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Feedback sought – Commercial Film and Video Production Facilities
    The Associate Minister for Greater Christchurch Regeneration, Poto Williams, is seeking feedback on a proposal to better enable the development and operation of commercial film and video facilities in Christchurch. The Proposal, developed by Regenerate Christchurch in response to a request from Christchurch City Council, asks that powers under section ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Govt launches bold primary sector plan to boost economic recovery
    The Government has launched a bold plan to boost primary sector export earnings by $44 billion over the next decade, while protecting the environment and growing jobs. Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern today released Fit for a Better World – Accelerating our Economic Potential, a 10-year roadmap to unlock greater value ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Wellbeing of whanau at heart of new hub
    A new approach to prevent family harm that encourages greater collaboration across government and community groups is being celebrated at the opening of a new facility in Auckland. Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern today opened the Multi-Disciplinary Family Harm Prevention Hub Te Taanga Manawa in Lambie Road in Manukau. The facility ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • New Report on Auckland Port Relocation
    The Government has released a major new report on the options for relocating the Port of Auckland’s freight operations while deferring any decision on the issue. “That decision needs to be informed by policy analysis that is still to be completed. As a result it will be up to a ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Dual place names for Te Pātaka-o-Rākaihautū / Banks Peninsula features
    The history of Rāpaki is being restored through the inclusion of te reo in thirteen official place names on Te Pātaka-o-Rākaihautū / Banks Peninsula and around Lyttelton Harbour/Whakaraupō, the Minister for Land Information, Eugenie Sage, announced today.   “I am pleased to approve the proposals from Te Hapū o Ngāti ...
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    6 days ago
  • Government and Air New Zealand agree to manage incoming bookings
    Bookings for seats on Air New Zealand flights into New Zealand will be managed in the short term to ensure the Government is able to safely place New Zealanders arriving home into a managed isolation or quarantine facility, says Housing Minister Megan Woods.  “Last week Air Commodore Darryn Webb and I ...
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    6 days ago
  • $80 million for sport recovery at all levels
    Grant Robertson has today announced the first major release of funding from the $265 million Sport Recovery Package announced at Budget 2020.  “Today we’re setting out how $80 million will be invested, with $54 million of that over the 2020/2021 financial year for organisations from community level through to elite ...
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    6 days ago
  • Keeping ACC levies steady until 2022
    The Government is maintaining current levy rates for the next 2 years, as part of a set of changes to help ease the financial pressures of COVID-19 providing certainty for businesses and New Zealanders, ACC Minister Iain Lees-Galloway says. “New Zealanders and businesses are facing unprecedented financial pressures as a ...
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    6 days ago
  • Extended loan scheme keeps business afloat
    Small businesses are getting greater certainty about access to finance with an extension to the interest-free cashflow loan scheme to the end of the year. The Small Business Cashflow Loan Scheme has already been extended once, to 24 July. Revenue and Small Business Minister Stuart Nash says it will be ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New investment creates over 2000 jobs to clean up waterways
    A package of 23 projects across the country will clean up waterways and deliver over 2000 jobs Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern and Environment Minister David Parker announced today. The $162 million dollar package will see 22 water clean-up projects put forward by local councils receiving $62 million and the Kaipara ...
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    1 week ago
  • Speech to Labour Party Congress 2020
    Tena koutou katoa  Nga tangata whenua o tenei rohe o Pōneke, tena koutou Nau mai, haere mai ki te hui a tau mo te roopu reipa Ko tatou!  Ko to tatou mana!  Ko to tatou kaupapa kei te kokiri whakamua  Tena koutou, tena koutou, tena tatou katoa   Welcome. I ...
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    1 week ago
  • PGF top-up for QE Health in Rotorua
    The Provincial Growth Fund (PGF) is investing $1.5 million to ensure QE Health in Rotorua can proceed with its world class health service and save 75 existing jobs, Under Secretary for Regional Economic Development, Fletcher Tabuteau announced today. The PGF funding announced today is in addition to the $8 million ...
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    1 week ago
  • Building a more sustainable construction sector
    A new programme, which sets a firm course for the Building and Construction sector to help reduce greenhouse gas emissions, has been announced by the Minister for Building and Construction Jenny Salesa. “A significant amount of New Zealand’s carbon emissions come from the building and construction sector.  If we’re serious ...
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    1 week ago