Open mike 18/01/2010

Written By: - Date published: 6:00 am, January 18th, 2010 - 16 comments
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Step right up to the mike…

16 comments on “Open mike 18/01/2010”

  1. Jenny 1

    International Hall of Shame

    Despite the massive fund raising and the many heroic efforts by people donating their time, effort and money to relieve the human suffering in Haiti.

    There is a certain strata of international society that simply cannot comprehend all this humanitarian effort for no reward.

    They think that every cloud should have a silver, (and gold), lining for them.

    The Haiti earthquake disaster is being used by these paid apologists and defenders of the unbridled free market, To push their various right-wing causes.

    First up:

    Pat Robertson

    Who is he?:

    Wealthy and influential US tele-evangelist

    Pet hate:

    1804 overthrow of slavery


    The Haiti earthquake was god’s punishment on Haiti for making a pact with the devil to overthrow French imperialism.

    Secret hope:

    Return of slavery and French imperialism to the Caribbean nation. (apparently)

    2nd runner up:

    Rush Limbaugh

    Who is he?:

    Wealthy and influential Republican Party talk show host:

    Pet hate:

    Liberal politics


    Americans should not give a penny to Haiti earthquake relief.

    Secret hope:

    Return of Bush era unconcern, for the impoverished victims of natural disasters.

    3rd equal runner up:

    George Samuel Antoine

    Who is he?:

    A member of Haiti’s ruling elite, currently serving as Haiti’s consul in Sao Paulo Brazil.


    This catastrophe is good for us here, it will make us known.

    Secret hope:

    That the semi-colonial political relationships and trade deals that keep his country poor and prostrate, but keep him and his mates in the manner that they are accustomed to, are continued and strengthen.

    3rd equal runner up:

    Fran O’Sullivan

    Who is she?

    Fran O’Sullivan is a well paid columnist for the New Zealand Herald and the National Business Review. Fran is a founder director of NZ US Business Council.

    Pet hate:

    New Zealand’s nuclear weapons free status.


    If a major disaster strikes here, would we cock a snoot at US help. if any US nuclear-powered carrier (was) deployed our way for humanitarian reasons

    Secret hope:

    That semi-colonial political relationships and trade deals that will make this country poor and prostrate, but keep her and her mates in the manner that they are accustomed to, are continued and strengthen.

    Dishonourable mention:

    Murray McCully;

    Who is he?:

    New Zealand’s deputy Prime Minister

    Pet Hate:

    Anything to do with work

    said: (after donating a niggardly $1million to Haiti)

    There is nothing we can do.

    Secret hope:

    To never have to do anything.

  2. Andrei 2

    They think that every cloud should have a silver, (and gold), lining for them.

    The Haiti earthquake disaster is being used by these paid apologists and defenders of the unbridled free market, To push their various right-wing causes.

    And it never occurs to you Jenny that you are doing exactly the same for your pet causes.

    Oh the irony

    • ak 2.1

      Quite right Andrei.

      That hairy bastard from Nazareth was the same. Exactly like Hitler.

      Oh the moronity.

  3. tyrannosaurus 3

    Hahah Rush cracks me up. But I feel that a lot of his continued popularity is based on shocked people reposting the dumb stuff he says. It’d be a shame if him saying a predictably inflammatory thing like that resulted in more people hearing what he has to say!

  4. Rodel 4

    ‘Prime minister John Key says there is a “definite possibility” that Waiheke will be part of his proposed national cycleway during a visit to Waiheke this week.’
    Sums it up!

    • Draco T Bastard 5.1

      Someone made a mistake and then corrected it you mean.


      • Andrei 5.1.1

        Hell of a mistake wouldn’t you say?

        Two years ago the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) issued a benchmark report that was claimed to incorporate the latest and most detailed research into the impact of global warming. A central claim was the world’s glaciers were melting so fast that those in the Himalayas could vanish by 2035.

        In the past few days the scientists behind the warning have admitted that it was based on a news story in the New Scientist, a popular science journal, published eight years before the IPCC’s 2007 report.

        It has also emerged that the New Scientist report was itself based on a short telephone interview with Syed Hasnain, a little-known Indian scientist then based at Jawaharlal Nehru University in Delhi.

        Hasnain has since admitted that the claim was “speculation” and was not supported by any formal research. If confirmed it would be one of the most serious failures yet seen in climate research. The IPCC was set up precisely to ensure that world leaders had the best possible scientific advice on climate change.

  5. Pascal's bookie 6


    QUOTE OF THE DAY…. In Massachusetts this morning, Scott Brown campaigned in West Springfield, where the conservative Senate hopeful complained about the tone of the campaign.

    “I’ll tell you what,” Brown said, using a megaphone to address the crowd. “There’s negative campaigning, and then there’s malicious campaigning.”

    “She’s malicious!” a man in the crowd cried out. “She’s a phony!” shouted another. “Shove a curling iron up her butt!” a third man interjected a few moments later.

  6. prism 8

    When it comes to disasters like this one in Haiti, there is always the problem of how to get the assistance required to the people who need it. In these clever technical and technological times why can’t disaster relief vehicles and systems be devised. Small drones could be sent off with food to inaccessible areas guided by Gps instead of being used to kill civilians who are unlucky enough to live in an area of interest to a bigger and vengeful power. Hovercraft could be used to lurch over rubble and vegetation and perhaps tow a trailer with water, basic medical supplies etc.

    Clever minds are available to think of practical and pragmatic solutions and with just some of the money that goes into rocketing and exploring into space a lot could be done in applied and directed design of physical capital on the earth. NASA has a huge budget like the military. Their end results are as useful as the Asian approach of buying paper models that represent their worries and then burning them, so symbolically destroying their concerns.

    Instead of the reasoned response of custom-made planned and waiting fully-serviced machinery and systems. all the world gets is sad reports accompanied by wails in tragic notes from commentators and concerted hand wringing by the UN and everybody else involved. (The French have led the way to improvements with Medicines Sans Frontiers and similar).

    The USA could withdraw half their soldiers from Afghanistan declaring loudly that Haiti was a greater need.
    They could be put onto infrastructure repair and rebuilding under their engineer corps. Wouldn’t that be a good way to withdraw gradually from the shitty mess they have stirred up in A-stan.

    All poor countries with little infrastructure are likely to have a wealthy elite who don’t really care about the people and their living conditions. The world should have better systems to help using just a fraction of the money used on less important projects.

    • Zorr 8.1

      The US hampering aid efforts through their own ineptitude? Say it ain’t so! 😛

      • Bill 8.1.1

        Here’s a link to an fairly sharp piece by Greg Palast on Haiti.

        He aptly subtitles it Blackwater Before Drinking Water” and then straight away points out …

        “There’s no such thing as a ‘natural’ disaster. 200,000 Haitians have been slaughtered by slum housing and IMF “austerity” plans.”

        And that’s true.

        If the same quake had hit Cuba instead there would not be 200 000 dead. If the same quake had hit the Dominican Republic there would not be 200 000 dead.

        The contrasts he highlights between the responses of the US and the likes of bankrupted Iceland or distant China would perhaps be material for humorous farce if it wasn’t for real.

        Palast doesn’t cover the likely aftermath of all this. While leaning on Palast’s piece Danny Schechter does that quite nicely by reminding us and quoting from some ofthe corporate fuckers circling over it all waiting for their feeding frenzy to begin.

  7. BLiP 9

    Currently doing the email rounds:

    Interpretation of Terror Alerts

    The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from Miffed to Peeved.

    Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to Irritated or even A Bit Cross.

    The English have not been A Bit Cross since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

    Terrorists have been re-categorized from Tiresome to a Bloody Nuisance.

    The last time the British issued a Bloody Nuisance warning level was in 1588 while sinking the Spanish Armada.

    The Scots raised their threat level from Pissed Off to Let’s get the Bastards.

    They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line in the British army for the last 300 years.

    The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide.

    The only two higher levels in France are Collaborate and Surrender.

    The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country’s military capability.

    It’s not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert.

    Italy has increased the alert level from Shout loudly and excitedly to Elaborate Military Posturing.

    Two more levels remain: Ineffective Combat Operations and Change Sides.

    The Germans also increased their alert state from Disdainful Arrogance to Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.

    They also have two higher levels: Invade a Neighbour and Lose.

    Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

    The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

    Americans meanwhile and as usual are carrying out pre-emptive strikes, on all of their allies, just in case.

    And in the southern hemisphere . . .

    New Zealand has also raised its security levels – from Huh? to You’re jokin’, mate!!.

    Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from No worries to She’ll be right, mate.

    Three more escalation levels remain: Crikey! followed by I think we’ll need to cancel the Barbie this weekend and finally The Barbie is cancelled. So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

  8. Bill 10

    By the way.

    Anybody had an eye on all the Cadbury stuff of late and been contemplating the possible consequences for NZ in terms of lay offs?

    Todd Stitzer, the Cadbury chief executive, has maintained that the business would be better off without Kraft. However, he recently told investors in New York that Hershey could expect higher earnings per share than Kraft if it were to buy the British confectioner, even though a Kraft takeover would present more cost-cutting opportunities.

    Bye-bye Cadbury in Dunedin?

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