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Selective memory

Written By: - Date published: 8:59 am, June 1st, 2012 - 37 comments
Categories: john key, making shit up - Tags:

Things Key can’t remember:

  • His position on Springbok tour: subject of mass protests under his idol, Muldoon.
  • His position on the anti-nuclear issue: cornerstone policy of 4th Labour government, triggered the schnapps election that brought down his hero.

Things Key can remember:

  • Never claiming the child tax rebate for his paper-run. Which is true because the rebate wasn’t introduced until 1978, when Key was 17.

37 comments on “Selective memory ”

  1. Tiger Mountain 1

    lying SOB simple as that

    • Tom Gould 1.1

      It’s not just ‘Johnny Sparkles’. Dunne and Turia can’t remember voting for the budget either.

  2. Carol 2

    Zetetic, maybe to your list can be added the one Felix posted to open mike this morning?

    Something Key was probably hoping no-one would remember? In 2005, Key stating that private schools are good because they have small class numbers.

    Open mike 01/06/2012


    • ghostwhowalksnz 2.1

      Parents wanting better education results from smaller classes- who would have guessed ?

  3. vto 3


  4. Anne 4

    Say it three times vto. It’ll make you feel better still. 🙂

    • felix 4.1

      NO VTO DON’T or he’ll appear in your bathroom.

      • vto 4.1.1

        It’s ok – turns out I’m a lot bigger than him.


        • will


          [Don’t SHOUT or in future we’ll delete it. Also, try and write coherent sentences please. — r0b]

        • Dr Terry

          Is that you, diving into your hole? Please stay put.

      • Roy 4.1.2

        If he does appear in your bathroom, please push his head into the toilet and flush. Thanks!

        • McFlock

          I can’t help thinking that he had a bit of that at school, and it helped make him the loving caring man he is today. 

          • will

            Oh you think i think he was like you at school just normal trying to strive for popularity until he reached his epiphany after having children

          • Vicky32

            I can’t help thinking that he had a bit of that at school, and it helped make him the loving caring man he is today. 


            😀 Yes!

    • will 4.2

      I dont think it will make him feel better unless he fools himself , oh I forgot silly me that is his lifes anthem haha aekae

  5. I regret to say that Key Obama and I were born within a few months of each other.  

    I can recall with the deepest clarity the events of 1981, the Hamilton pitch invasion, the marches I went on, the escalating violence, being in the Marist Rugby clubrooms after the Auckland game and being ashamed at the bull headed buffoons yelling abuse at the protesters.  I particularly recall being batoned on the day of the third test.

    If Key cannot recall he needs medical assistance, fast.

    Maybe he has been taking tips from John Banks? 

    • Blue 5.1

      Wasn’t Key’s defence that he was a self-centred wanker who didn’t really care what was going on around him because he was too interested in his own life to bother?

      • felix 5.1.1

        Sort of, but he phrased his defence as “Awwww…. yeaaaaaah…. naaaaaah….. awwwwww…… ummmmmm….. jeeee…. oh I don’t…… jeeee…. awww I don’t………. naaah, yeaaaah…….. boy this is a hard one……. awwww…”

        • felix

          ps http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laEXIrKK8rI

          Notably for a person who can’t remember thinking anything about the single biggest political event of his early adulthood, he says he was “always interested in politics” and had “written to a couple of prime ministers” by that time.

          As he has also mentioned that Muldoon was his favourite PM and his political hero, it’s probably reasonable to assume that Muldoon was one of the PMs he wrote to.

          I wonder what the subject matter was. Oh for a tardis and an OIA.

    • Dr Terry 5.2

      Key will not want to remember that dismal failure of Muldoon (and all his cops)! But such a memory would only scare him.

  6. yeshe 6

    also he ‘forgot’ his Kiwirail shares … echo Tiger Mountain above .. lying SOB, simple as that.

  7. Roy 7

    I don’t believe any person who was over the age of 15 and resident in New Zealand at the time of the Springbok tour in 1981 does not remember what their position on it was, unless: (1) They were then, and/or are now, of seriously impaired intellect, or (2) They now have seriously impaired memory.
    (Okay, so my grammar isn’t very good.)

    • Galeandra 7.1

      Or they supported the tour, and don’t want to be shown up now. Which is what I suspect.

    • bbfloyd 7.2

      Or the third option…… he either supported the tour, or was so wrapped up in his mindless pursuit of the money trail that nothing else counted….

      Let’s answer for him then…”i was so caught up with studying how to become rich, that i didn’t notice what was going on all around me”….

      There you go mr sparkles….. sorted it for you…..no need to hide from the question now…

      • Sukie Damson 7.2.1

        there is always the fourth option … he supported the springboks. Not totally implausible.

    • will 7.3

      I agree your grammar nor your manner its just the fact of the matter lol

    • Vicky32 7.4

      (Okay, so my grammar isn’t very good.)

      It’s fine! 🙂

    • Bob 7.5

      He doesn’t want to remember and when he returns to his home it won’t matter to him!

    • Te Reo Putake 8.1

      Given the website its on, its probably not true, whatever it is.

      • Vicky32 8.1.1

        Given the website its on, its probably not true, whatever it is.

        Given you have no intention of reading it, what a bizarre statement! So open-minded of you…

  8. Geoff 9

    In 1981 John Key was at Canterbury University – a hotbed of anti-tour protest in Chch. To suggest he didn’t have a stance on the tour is such nonsense. He wasn’t a hermit. I’m sure it would be easy to find some of his cohorts from that time who would confirm he was all for it..

  9. Dr Terry 10

    It is encouraging to know that at least some people are doing necessary research, even if those too idle to do the work sneer at their efforts. The research is not a task beyond quite easy management. May I suggest that more people take it up? You must be prepared for more than a few surprises!.

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