web analytics

The No-Dinner Dinner

Written By: - Date published: 10:32 pm, September 28th, 2011 - 30 comments
Categories: labour - Tags:

Ever seen one of those celebrity fundraiser dinners and wondered how much money was going on the fancy food that could have been going to the cause?

Well, Labour’s latest offering is giving you the chance to cut through the middleman with the ‘no-dinner dinner’.

The tongue-in-cheek menu is a bit of a laugh:

We’ve got Bennett Mutton Dressed as Lamb in an Avocado and Minto Sauce, or Extremely Boring Meat-and-Two-Veg Aux Dunne w/ an Undertone of Sanctimonious Sauce.

Light, Fluffy, Dissolve-to-Nothing Key Souffle w/ Limited Complexity Chateau Holmes Pinot Gris 2010, and Succulent Joycey Pork in a Barrel w/ Thompson’s “Foot in Mouth” Sangiovese.

Check out all the menu options here.

30 comments on “The No-Dinner Dinner ”

  1. insider 1

    This is almost as funny as that song those female mps did at conference a few years back 🙂

  2. Policy Parrot 2

    This could never happen in the National Party. Half the reason for party functions is the opulent/extravagant menu served up. Not to mention the opportunity to showcase the latest dinner suits and gowns. Its about being a better class, and being able to prove so. Their politics is the art of preservation of their way of life.

    • Bazar 2.1

      “This could never happen in the National Party.”

      Indeed, a menu that is is all talk, but when it comes to serving, no real substance behind it.
      Fitting that its from labour then isn’t it.

      *Puts on flame retardant suit*

  3. higherstandard 3

    Brilliant this’ll get the money and votes flowing in ………………….. snigger.

  4. The Gormless Fool formerly known as Oleolebiscuitbarrell 4

    “Bennett Mutton Dressed as Lamb”

    So, they went for criticising her appearance?

  5. Joe Bloggs 5

    another vote-weiner for Labour.

    Hearty congratulations to Trevor Mallard – the best campaign manager National could wish for!

  6. BWS 6

    How many hours of strategic brilliance went into this unfunny personality-attack filled bile, instead of communicating Labour’s policies with the electorate? Didn’t Labour learn last time that just attacking your opponents, and not saying one positive thing about your own plans, is a fast way to self destruction?

  7. Bob Stanforth 7

    I honestly cannot think of a better way to sum labour up. No, really. Yes, I’m sure it was meant as a ‘light hearted’ moment. Its not. Its mean spirited and petty.

    Perfect. You must be very proud. How to demonstrate leadership in waiting. Does anyone in labour realise how stupid and venal this makes them look? And Eddie, you’re happy to post this effort? Your standards really have dropped haven’t they?

  8. Hang on a minute. Right wingers trying to have their cake and eat it too?

    I thought the constant refrain from the right was that the left fails to appreciate the ‘funny’ side of Paul Henry comments, the PM’s coal mine reference, the PMs cannibal reference, the PMs Letterman appearance, etc., etc. and that any left organised event is boringly tedious.

    Now that someone on the left demonstrates some humour it’s all ‘tut, tut, tut’ and ‘how inappropriate’. And we were led to believe that Key’s Letterman appearance was not lame but ‘a real hit with Kiwis’ who, so we were told, like their humour as trite as possible but, now, this humour is, apparently, just hopeless and the implication is that it would never strike a chord with voters (Good grief – and the left are blamed for double standards!)

    We even get the previously silent right wing ‘PC brigade’ complaining about attacks on appearances. Where were they when Helen Clark or Stephanie Mills needed them?

    Personally, I particularly liked the ‘Succulent, Joycey Pork in a barrell’ comment, given the offer to Mediaworks of a ‘helping hand’ leading into an election year. I have never heard any remotely believable justification for such an apparently corrupt decision. It deserves – at the very least – constant lampooning. 

    • Bob Stanforth 8.1

      You may find this odd, but making sweeping generalisations does not an argument make. The Right? Please. Hows about the ‘leaders in waiting’ show some maturity. Funny isnt personal. Its pathetic.

      • The Gormless Fool formerly known as Oleolebiscuitbarrell 8.1.1

        How silly of us to expect you to live up to the standards you set for everyone else, Puddleglum.

        • Puddleglum

          Hi Oleole (etc.), people should of course live up to the standards they set for everyone else, at a bare minimum. That’s long been recognised as pretty central to the validity of moral prescription. 

          I presume from your one-liner that you mean that it is hypocritical of me to complain about some people’s defence of previous ‘humorous’ behaviour (e.g., condoning Paul Henry’s comments, the PM’s comments) while appearing to condone this example of ‘humour’?

          I don’t see how you get to that conclusion.

          You’re certainly right that my main point was the hypocrisy involved in any attempt to excuse or minimise the significance of either supposedly offensive (e.g., Paul Henry’s comments about Stephanie Mills) or lame (e.g., the PM’s Letterman appearance) humour in one circumstance while condemning or emphasising supposedly offensive or lame humour in another.

          But notice that my comment doesn’t do that itself.

          I agree with you, for example, that the ‘mutton dressed as lamb’ ‘joke’ is too personalised, offensive and uncalled for – which is why I bemoaned, in my comment, the lack of support I perceived for Stephanie Mills and Helen Clark when they were similarly being attacked. The whole point of my mentioning it was to point out that this is the same kind of ‘humour’ (offensive). How is that being hypocritical? Again, how does pointing out a rhetorical shift in general commentary on an event amount to applying standards to others that I’m not applying to myself?

          The other parts of the ‘menu’ were, so far as I could see, certainly as humourous as John Key’s jokes about cannibalism or coal mines, if not more so. Yet, supposedly, they further consign Labour to vote losing while Key’s jokes, supposedly, are all part of his vote-winning appeal (I agree that they are part of his appeal to the general public, despite – or maybe even because of – their lameness.). How is it hypocritical to point this out? How am I supposedly applying different standards to myself here than those I apply to others?

          Also, apart from the Paula Bennett comment, the rest conformed to the long tradition of normal political satire which has always focused on public individuals and lampoons them for their political behaviour (think political cartoonists) – quite rightly.

          In that sense, those humorous comments make important political points and are quite different from the supposed humour of a Paul Henry. That’s why I highlighted the play on Steven Joyce’s name because, as I explained, it kept in focus a significant and dubious decision by this government.

          Once again, how is that not living up to standards I set for others? 

      • Puddleglum 8.1.2

        You’re right, Bob. Sweeping generalisations do not make an argument – but they can make a point; which was what I was doing.

        In effect, anyone who was inclined to excuse Paul Henry and the PM in the instances I noted but is now inclined to criticise Labour might want to ponder that point. If the cap doesn’t fit, Bob, then don’t wear it.

        I’m actually no fan of Labour and think that the humour here was not strong, but it’s clear to me that, in the run up to an election, criticising the humour at a Labour party function has an element of political intent behind it. Given the context, that intent can quite legitimately be said to arise from ‘The Right’ and from ‘right wingers’.

        As for ‘Funny isn’t personal’, there goes an entire history of satire – all the way from Swift, most English language nursery rhymes and just about every political tv satire ever written. 

        • Bob Stanforth

          All worthy points, except you forget one highly salient point – comedians yes, leaders (or rather, wanna be leaders) of countries, no. A large can of grow up should be applied.

          • Puddleglum

            Agreed – but there’s been a long list of leaders here who’ve made jokes at the expense of their political rivals: Lange, Muldoon, Cullen and our own John Key (e.g., the ‘Phil-in Goff’ remark in Parliament after the last election).

            Let’s be honest – ‘attack humour’ is omnipresent in our political system.

            As for maturity, you could argue that none of our ‘leaders’ have ever been mature enough to lead, I suppose, but you wouldn’t be correct to claim that a lack of maturity has ever barred anyone from being a leader: The electorate doesn’t seem to have been that discerning on that point, at any rate. 

            • Bob Stanforth

              Fair call – but my point still stands. labout wants to be considered leaders – act like it. As demonstrated during the recent “I hate the Mad Butcher” tantrum from a labour MP who should really know better, a higher standard is required. Yes, the electorate, like markets, are fickle and unpredictable. But act like an arse, expect to be treated that way.

  9. Anne 9

    Dear oh dear, the RWNJ nasties can’t take it when the humour (satire) is directed at them.

    As for the menu:
    I have a recollection of a certain National member of parliament in the 90s doing a similar job on Labour with a wine menu. Did Labour whine and moan and turn nasty? No, they took it on the chin and grinned. But that’s the difference between the two parties. Labour can laugh at itself as well as their opponents. The Nats have neither the wit nor the maturity – as evidenced by some of the comments here.

    • Bob Stanforth 9.1

      Oh dear Anne, is that it, is that really the very best you can do, to defend this puerile shite? Simply calling everyone who calls labour on this a RWNJ is lazy and simple minded. And even putting wit in the same sentence as this childish attempt at humour is laughable in itself.

    • higherstandard 9.2

      “Labour can laugh at itself as well as their opponents. The Nats have neither the wit nor the maturity – as evidenced by some of the comments here.”

      What like Darien Fenton blacklisting the butcher and commenters here hoping for his death ?

      Or like you calling Owen Glen a goon today on another thread ?

      Yes all very witty and mature indeed.

      As an aside this menu is a bit of a laugh but not nearly as funny as Paul Henry’s ‘ that was a moustache on a lady” it’s all in the delivery.

      • mickysavage 9.2.1

        You have no standards.  You are a troll  You have engaged in all sorts of weird behaviour and it is strange that you are now calling others out on stuff you have no compulsion about doing.
        You should go and get real work or a life or something.

  10. The Gormless Fool formerly known as Oleolebiscuitbarrell 10

    “humour (satire)”

    Comedy (gold).

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • NZ announces a third P-3 deployment in support of UN sanctions
    The Government has deployed a Royal New Zealand Air Force P-3K2 Orion (P-3) maritime patrol aircraft to support the implementation of United Nations Security Council (UNSC) resolutions imposing sanctions against North Korea, announced Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters and Minister of Defence Ron Mark. “New Zealand has long supported ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Pacific trade and development agreement a reality
    Pacific regional trade and development agreement PACER Plus will enter into force in 60 days now that the required eight countries have ratified it. Trade and Export Growth Minister David Parker welcomed the announcement that the Cook Islands is the eighth nation to ratify this landmark agreement. “The agreement represents ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 days ago
  • Securing a pipeline of teachers
    The Government is changing its approach to teacher recruitment as COVID-19 travel restrictions continue, by boosting a range of initiatives to get more Kiwis into teaching. “When we came into Government, we were faced with a teacher supply crisis,” Education Minister Chris Hipkins said. “Over the past three years, we ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Border exceptions for a small number of international students with visas
    The Government has established a new category that will allow 250 international PhD and postgraduate students to enter New Zealand and continue their studies, in the latest set of border exceptions. “The health, safety and wellbeing of people in New Zealand remains the Government’s top priority. Tight border restrictions remain ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • First COVID-19 vaccine purchase agreement signed
    The Government has signed an agreement to purchase 1.5 million COVID-19 vaccines – enough for 750,000 people – from Pfizer and BioNTech, subject to the vaccine successfully completing all clinical trials and passing regulatory approvals in New Zealand, say Research, Science and Innovation Minister Megan Woods and Health Minister Chris Hipkins. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • International statement – End-to-end encryption and public safety
    We, the undersigned, support strong encryption, which plays a crucial role in protecting personal data, privacy, intellectual property, trade secrets and cyber security.  It also serves a vital purpose in repressive states to protect journalists, human rights defenders and other vulnerable people, as stated in the 2017 resolution of the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Ministry of Defence Biodefence Assessment released
    The Ministry of Defence has today released a Defence Assessment examining Defence’s role across the spectrum of biological hazards and threats facing New Zealand. Biodefence: Preparing for a New Era of Biological Hazards and Threats looks at how the NZDF supports other agencies’ biodefence activities, and considers the context of ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New Approaches to Economic Challenges: Confronting Planetary Emergencies: OECD 9 October 2020
    New Approaches to Economic Challenges: Confronting Planetary Emergencies: OECD 9 October 2020 Hon David Parker’s response following Thomas Piketty and Esther Duflo. Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening, wherever in the world you might be. I first acknowledge the excellent thought provoking speeches of Thomas Piketty and Esther ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Kaipara Moana restoration takes next step
    A Memorandum of Understanding has been signed today at Waihāua Marae between the Crown, local iwi and councils to protect, restore and enhance the mauri of Kaipara Moana in Northland. Environment Minister David Parker signed the document on behalf of the Crown along with representatives from Ngā Maunga Whakahī, Ngāti ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • New Zealand and Uruguay unite on reducing livestock production emissions
    Agriculture Minister Damien O’Connor and Uruguayan Minister of Livestock, Agriculture and Fisheries Carlos María Uriarte have welcomed the launch of a three-year project that will underpin sustainable livestock production in Uruguay, Argentina, and Costa Rica.  The project called ‘Innovation for pasture management’ is led by Uruguay’s National Institute of Agricultural ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • 3100 jobs created through marae upgrades
    Hundreds of marae throughout the country will be upgraded through investments from the Provincial Growth Fund’s refocused post COVID-19 funding to create jobs and put money into the pockets of local tradespeople and businesses, Regional Economic Development Minister Shane Jones and Māori Development Minister Nanaia Mahuta have announced. “A total ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Health volunteers recognised in annual awards
    Health Minister Chris Hipkins has announced 9 teams and 14 individuals are the recipients of this year’s Minister of Health Volunteer Awards.  “The health volunteer awards celebrate and recognise the thousands of dedicated health sector volunteers who give many hours of their time to help other New Zealanders,” Mr Hipkins ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Community COVID-19 Fund supports Pacific recovery
    The Minister for Pacific Peoples, Aupito William Sio says a total of 264 groups and individuals have successfully applied for the Pacific Aotearoa Community COVID-19 Recovery Fund, that will support Pacific communities drive their own COVID-19 recovery strategies, initiatives, and actions. “I am keen to see this Fund support Pacific ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Community benefits from Māori apprenticeships
    Up to 50 Māori apprentices in Wellington will receive paid training to build houses for their local communities, thanks to a $2.75 million investment from the Māori Trades and Training Fund, announced Employment Minister Willie Jackson today. “This funding will enable Ngāti Toa Rangatira Incorporated to provide its Ngā Kaimahi ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Training fund supports Māori jobseekers
    Rapidly growing sectors will benefit from a $990,000 Māori Trades and Training Fund investment which will see Wellington jobseekers supported into work, announced Employment Minister Willie Jackson today. “This funding will enable Sapphire Consultants Ltd. to help up to 45 Māori jobseekers into paid training initiatives over two years through ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Ruakura Inland Port development vital infrastructure for Waikato
    The Government is investing $40 million to develop an inland port at Ruakura which will become a freight super-hub and a future business, research and residential development for the Waikato, Urban Development and Transport Minister Phil Twyford, and Māori Development Minister Nanaia Mahuta announced today. The funding has been has ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Appointments made to Defence Expert Review Group
    Defence Minister Ron Mark announced today the establishment of an Expert Review Group to review a number of aspects of the New Zealand Defence Force’s (NZDF) structure, information management and record-keeping processes.  The Expert Review Group’s work arises out of the first recommendation from the Report of the Government’s Inquiry ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • No active community cases of COVID-19
    There are no active community cases of COVID-19 remaining in the country after the last people from the recent outbreak have recovered from the virus, Health Minister Chris Hipkins said today. “This is a big milestone. New Zealanders have once again through their collective actions squashed the virus. The systems ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Clean energy upgrade for more public buildings
    More public buildings will be supported by the Government to upgrade to run on clean energy, the Minister for Climate Change James Shaw announced today. Minister Shaw announced that Lincoln and Auckland universities will receive support through the Clean-Powered Public Service Fund to replace fossil fuel boilers. Southern, Taranaki, and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Schools back donations scheme for the second year
    More schools have opted in to the donations scheme for 2021, compared to 2020 when the scheme was introduced. “The families of more than 447,000 students will be better off next year, with 94% of eligible schools and kura opting into the scheme,” Education Minister Chris Hipkins said. “This is ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Ruapehu cycle trails gets PGF boost
    The spectacular Mountains to Sea cycle trail in Ruapehu District will receive $4.6 million in funding from the Provincial Growth Fund for two additional trails, Regional Economic Development Minister Shane Jones announced today. “This is an exciting development for the local community, and one that will provide significant economic opportunities ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago
  • Update to air border order strengthens crew requirements
    Additional measures coming into effect on Monday will boost our defence against COVID-19 entering New Zealand through the air border, Health Minister Chris Hipkins said today. “As part of our precautionary approach and strategy of constant review, we’re tightening the requirements around international aircrew,” Chris Hipkins said. The COVID-19 Public ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago
  • A true picture of Māori business activity
    A better picture of the contribution Māori businesses make to the economy will be possible with changes to the way information is collected about companies and trading enterprises. Māori Development Minister Nanaia Mahuta and Small Business Minister Stuart Nash have announced a new option for Māori enterprises who are part ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago
  • PGF funding for Taranaki projects
    The South Taranaki museum, a New Plymouth distillery and a Pasifika building firm will benefit from a Government investment totalling more than $1 million, Regional Economic Development Minister Shane Jones says. The $1.05m in grants and loans from the Provincial Growth Fund (PGF) will help the recipients expand and create ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago
  • Fijian Language Week 2020 inspires courage and strength during COVID-19 pandemic
    The Minister for Pacific Peoples, Aupito William Sio says the theme for the 2020 Fijian Language Week reflects the strong belief by Fijians that their language and culture inspires courage and strength that is strongly needed in times of emergencies, or through a significant challenge like the global COVID-19 pandemic ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 weeks ago