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National Party leadership spill under way

Written By: - Date published: 7:16 am, April 1st, 2021 - 17 comments
Categories: humour, The Standard, uncategorized - Tags:

Credible sources indicate that a Chris Penk-Simeon Brown ticket have the numbers for a National Party leadership spill and have started the process.  Stand by for developments.

17 comments on “National Party leadership spill under way ”

  1. Incognito 1

    About time that somebody did something about JC and the shambles that is the National Party. The Excruciating Brethren Chris and Simeon are the only option to take National down further into the Abyss of Abolition. Bring it on, I say. Are they ‘leaking’ to Tetchy Tova or Sobrietous Soper?

    When is the next poll?

    • gsays 1.1

      Questions questions.

      Reminds me of an Ian Hislop quip after Robert Maxwell went 'missing' off a yacht.

      "Did he jump, was he pushed? Will we ever care?"

      • Incognito 1.1.1

        The National Party is the gift that just keeps giving. Much better investment in the entertainment industry than The Wiggles, IMHO. BTW, it was a big mistake for the PM to get involved in that; she’s got much bigger fish to fry and she knows that from past experiences.

        Anyway, I’ve ordered in extra popcorn (and Easter eggs, of course) and it will be delivered this arvo unless the courier is held up by an Evergreen truck; it is a never given with courier ETAs 🙁

        • GreenBus

          “BTW, it was a big mistake for the PM to get involved in that; she’s got much bigger fish to fry and she knows that from past experiences.”

          At face value I’m pretty happy the Wiggles got some preferential treatment for all our country’s children that enjoy their shows so much. The kids don’t need any more shit heaped on them, it’s not their fault Covid is stopping fun.

          Agree that the bigger disaster the Natz become the better. What a train wreck. Long may it continue. Hah bloody hah.

          • RedBaronCV

            Like you I too think it's very good that the littler citizens had some thing done for them that they could enjoy.

            But hey this needs to be attacked doesn't it because it isn't the preferential treatment that say "Adult male sport gets" like the America's cup and the smaller ones don't have a board to hand out free tickets and lobby off the back of that. Or the rich people who want a visa to move here en masse.


        • greywarshark

          Ha Incognito. Don't buy one of those hollow Easter eggs though. Just a taste of chocolate and then it's all gone. I reckon stick to the marshmallow and it will stick with you.

          And glad someone noticed the difference between caring about our young ones, and giving them some fun, and what the bigger boys consider is their right to be Ever Given.

    • Chris 1.2

      Hope they don't trough too soon.

  2. Heather Tanguay 2

    Bill and Ben the Flowerpot men.

    It will be Women back to the kitchen to make scones!

  3. mike 3

    The civil war within National is deadly serious and could tear it apart in the same way as the Republican party in the US.

    Unable to capture power under their own flag, christian extremists have infected the National party, swamping candidate selections with their hastily signed up congregations. Parties with no policy other than to retain power embrace anyone who pays, and are vulnerable to attack by groups with a secret agenda. Luckily for us the whole hideous outcome of such a takeover has been laid bare by the behaviour of those now controlling the Republican party. No-one, other than an evangelical fascist gets a look in in candidate contests and their mad-dog chauvinist agenda has become the norm.

    These people are relentless and menacing and will happily destroy the National party to get power and dominate us all in a theocracy – the very worst kind of dictatorship.

    • Nic 181 3.1

      I agree, look for even more pale stale males and females, with a predilection for happy clapping and even more conservative policies. You can predict it now, tough on crime, restrict abortion, remove euthanasia laws, war on drugs, another “mother of all budgets” to put beneficiaries in their place and a round of austerity to pay down debt, sell off assets and give tax cuts. Muppets!!

  4. RedBaronCV 4

    But Judith is a gift that keeps on giving. Would other people be better? Although my first reaction was – who? and who?.

    And is it easy to get a candidate selected if a group sign up to a branch en masse. That has big potential.

    • Anne 4.1

      To my mind, they are still reaping the fallout from the Cameron Slater et al era which wasn't that long ago. Quite a few potential candidates were undermined and discredited by that gang of nasties from the ultra-right rim of the party. They probably lost good leadership among them which could have lifted them out of the doldrums by now.

      Can't say I have an ounce of sympathy for them.

  5. JO 5

    Blimey, it's an looming alarming tsunami


    Mr Bridges told RNZ he stood by his comments and said it was his duty as Opposition leader to ask tough questions on behalf of the public.

  6. PapaMike 6

    What a load of inventing made up Bollocks !

  7. Renee van de Weert 7

    Happy April Fools Day.

    • Drowsy M. Kram 8.1

      What, no room for one of Collins' eyebrows in a Best Supporting Actress role?

      Still, maybe the best recent offering from the opposition National party since Merv's 'prank' call, although they've still got some way to go to beat The Dancing Cossacks!

      On April Fools Day [1975], the Labour government started a compulsory superannuation scheme, and called it 'A bold piece of social legislation.' It wasn't even a very funny joke.

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