Family First and Dr Miriam Grossman are still lying about sex ed

Written By: - Date published: 7:00 pm, June 19th, 2013 - 23 comments
Categories: education - Tags: , , , ,

Well, another lethal blow to my ego:  no one in the mainstream media reads my blog.

That’s the only reason I can think for them breathlessly covering a “report” from Family First – who, let’s all remember, were de-registered as a charity, in part because all their “research” is baseless propaganda – which dishonestly covers much the same ground I did nearly a year ago.

That is, the dark, seedy underbelly of New Zealand’s sex ed websites.

If only I’d published my post as a “critical review” under the banner of some vocal, extremist Christians, then the mainstream media might have taken me seriously published my opinions as though they were fact.

Anyway, you should totally go check out my original post, if only because there are balloon animals fucking each other in it.

Hat tip to Kevin Hague, Frank and Gay NZ for fighting the good fight on this one.  As Kevin says,

Our problem in New Zealand is not that the resources produced by great organisations like Family Planning and Rainbow Youth are wrong. It is that we know what works but have failed to ensure that every school uses a sexuality education approach consistent with these criteria.

And one of the obstacles in our way is extreme conservatives trying to force a ludicrous Mad-Men-if-you’ve-never-actually-watched-Mad-Men style of morality on us.

23 comments on “Family First and Dr Miriam Grossman are still lying about sex ed ”

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  1. karol 1
    19 June 2013 at 8:02 pm

    Form the TV One article, (link in QOT’s post:

    Grossman says the message to teens should be that sex is a very serious matter and a single encounter can change their lives forever.

    Teenagers should be told to wait until they are adults, she said.

    Right, I would have been laughing if some older person had said that to me decades ago when I was a teen. Were such people as Grossman ever teenagers?

    • RedBaronCV 1.1
      19 June 2013 at 8:30 pm

      Personally, I’ve always felt that those who want to spend so much time running other people’s (sex) lives, do so because they were so unsuccessful behind the bike shed at school.

    • Roy 1.2
      20 June 2013 at 8:59 am

      Maybe Grossman was one of those teens who never got any, and has seethed with envy of sexually active teens ever since?

    • Rosetinted 1.3
      20 June 2013 at 2:34 pm

      Teenagers should be told to wait until they are adults, she said.

      Teenagers should be advised to wait until they are adults. And group discussion about how to handle difficult encounters where unwanted or unexpected sex can attack! Down, boy/girl down. How to keep from someone trying it out on you as a know-nothing who doesn’t want first experiences to be so banal, and unfortunately memorable.

      Where to discreetly get condoms is handy knowledge that all should learn. Are they all one size? Also how to handle them without sticking your long nails through the side! and how to unroll them down your middle finger perhaps. Like knowing how to put in a battery correctly, with the plus and the minus in the right places.

      This business of giving advice, I’ve already put up a saying today about that. Having an adult caution you is very intriguing. Just the opposite effect that the adult hoped for.

  2. Pasupial 2
    20 June 2013 at 2:32 am

    Sex Ignorance vs Sex Education.

  3. Saccharomyces 3
    20 June 2013 at 9:34 am

    Great post on your blog. Love the header pic too, WH40k for the win.

    This kind of clap-trap is just like the people that were freaking out about Gardasil, saying that if you gave it to your 12 year old she’d be out rooting that night.

    The reality is kids are going to get up to it, so they had best be informed. I might be wrong, but aren’t the stats in the US that rates of teen pregnancy and STI’s higher in “abstinence-only” states/counties?

  4. jcuknz 4
    20 June 2013 at 10:25 am

    What Crossman says is so correct but the quote is not complete … If I said the same the punch line would be… ..

    But if you do then take precautions to ensure there are no consequences such as babies and sexual diseases.

    • framu 4.1
      20 June 2013 at 12:49 pm

      maybe add “in an ideal world” to the bit about abstaining as well

      but thats their method isnt it – say something that is true enough – but completely ignore reality at the same time

  5. framu 5
    20 June 2013 at 12:55 pm

    When i was at high school we had IMO a rather brilliant sex ed set up

    Two classes per course would attend. But each class would only go to sex ed once a fortnight – one class at a time.
    The other class that wasnt in sex ed that week went to the community creche next door and were made to look after the kids there.

    certainly had an immediate effect on many

    though i will admit we were still teenagers, so unplanned stuff still happened, but we were given more of a complete picture

  6. Jokerman 6
    20 June 2013 at 4:03 pm

    well, great post QoT, I feel confident that the ‘MSM’ do come across 😉 your posts, however, welcome to the Dark Ages. (chap I was chatting with last night was ‘getting it on’ when the mother of his children was nine). Good Luck with that Family Fist… speaking of fisting… is it amazing how up for that some people (old enough know better) are! Ha freakin’ ha, we know what you repressed, sublimated- desire types get up to. And, while on this subject, Guess What? it is the agenda of the dispossessed among you to breed you out, so lock up you daughters! Whatever, kids be dry-humping at primary school, fools!

  7. mum 7
    20 June 2013 at 6:31 pm

    My daughter has actually requested that she not attend health until they finish the current segment on sex ed.

    For her, it was all too upsetting after some boy tried to pressure her to go further than she was ready for. Thankfully she had the strength to say no – and I made it very clear to him what the consequences would be if he came near her again – but weeks later,she was bursting into tears in sex ed class because it was too traumatic for her.

    Spare a thought for young girls who find these classes a trigger point.

    • QoT 7.1
      20 June 2013 at 9:32 pm

      No one’s suggesting forcing people, especially those who would be triggered, to attend sex ed.

      There’s a big bloody difference between “letting people opt out” and “telling baldfaced lies about what is taught”.

      • jcuknz 7.1.1
        22 June 2013 at 11:22 am

        If parents have not the gumption to explain, or in fact know other than the grubby details, then it is the responsibility of society to educate, a complete education which includes an appreciation of the result of indulgence with regard to disease and social consequences.

  8. millsy 8
    20 June 2013 at 8:20 pm

    Family First basically want to criminalise people for having sex out side of marriage. Especially the teens. Sex is grubby and all that.

    I say let them have their little rolls in the hay. Make love not war and all that.

    Anyway the oldies are the ones that need watching. They are the ones who hire the escorts and go to the sex parties, and are seen at the bars late at night ready to pounce. And then point the finger at their kids for making out on the couch.

    And besides, I think I read somewhere that teens were having less sex according to surveys…

  9. jcuknz 9
    22 June 2013 at 11:15 am

    I think there is something seriously wrong with the upbringing of a child bursting into tears during a sex education class. Though I must admit I was seriously disturbed when shown a film on sexual disease on joining the army for my National Service.
    I remember the torment I went through during my adolescence through lack of education, which thankfully ended following going for advice following the film. Altogether quite amusing in reflection that little segment of my life.

    • Descendant Of Sssmith 9.1
      22 June 2013 at 10:55 pm

      My great grandfather always slept in a separate bed to my great grandmother.

      We never knew why until doing some family tree research and found while he was in Egypt he was hospitalised for syphilis twice.

      You should be grateful you saw the video.

      • jcuknz 9.1.1
        23 June 2013 at 7:44 pm

        I am 🙂
        But the key point was there was no problem if you asked for help but a charge if they found you with it … as it was ignorance and nobody to turn made me think I had something which I didn’t. The worst film I have seen is the eye safety one. I also saw a heart operation shot for our local hospital board commecial and the worst part was the stupid producer etc going on about how sick it was making them.

  10. Descendant Of Sssmith 10
    22 June 2013 at 10:47 pm

    I remember growing up my mother having to deal with the occasional one of my sisters’ freinds staying overnight having their first period and not knowing what was happening. I have also dealt with teenagers who had discovered sex all by themselves but had no idea that is how babies were made.

    In all but one of those cass the parents were religous and the one that wasn’t was in foster care due to their mother being in Lake Alice.

    Even though I was youngish at the time I was quite frustrated that their parents could be so irresponsible.

    I have found too that the religous door knockers are quite happy to put their Christian beliefs aside and outright lie to people about what is taught in schools. One was quite happily telling the whole neighbourhood that the sex ed DVD at my kids school was full of people having sex and was focussed on showing them different positions and was highly pornographic. When I asked him if he’d actually seen it he said no but he had it on good authority. When I said I was on the BOT and that it was nothing like he was describing and I was more than happy to show him it there was not only no desire to do this there wasn’t even a hint of well I got it wrong and I must not tell lies.

    Sanctimonious person he is with his wife nodding yes beside him (the similarity between this couple and Tremain nodding behind Key always amuses me). Occasionally she is allowed to agree with her husband. Yeah they are regular door knockers.

    I notice in mainstream media there seems to be regular stories about religous groups and what they promulgate. This seems to me a deliberate but devious way of promoting their agenda. There’s never the balance or the other side that QOT and others point out in these articles/stories/fluff pieces/ propaganda.

    Yet another one today.

    http://www.stuff.co.nz/oddstuff/8827706/School-releases-pamphlet-with-sex-alternatives

    • ghostrider888 10.1
      22 June 2013 at 11:21 pm

      the rise, and rise, of conservative fundamentalism DOS, hence the growing epidemic of STI’s among the young, and not so young.There is a link in todays OM (22.6) concerning just how many in the general population access online porn; enough stats to predict a few ‘religious’ types spread across the range.

    • jcuknz 10.2
      23 June 2013 at 7:48 pm

      “Christian schools teach that the safest way of protecting yourself medically and emotionally is to wait until a stable, married relationship,” he told AAP.
      While there are obviously numerous good marraiges I wonder if they teach kids that there is a goodly proportion that are not.