Arise Sir John

Written By: - Date published: 7:24 am, June 5th, 2017 - 261 comments
Categories: john key, useless - Tags: , ,

For creating a New Zealand where there are over 250,000 kids living in poverty …

For refusing to get the bodies out of the Pike River mine and thereby helping individuals avoid justice …

For Dirty Politics …

For the increasing numbers of homeless sleeping rough …

For selling off shares in the electricity companies and in Air New Zealand and enriching the wealthy at the expense of the rest of us …

For presiding over the development of a housing crisis yet refusing to accept that one existed …

For increasing the Crown’s debt from $10 billion to $93 billion and claiming this was evidence of sound financial management …

For widening inequality in NZ …

For the widening sexist pay gap in NZ …

For legislating to give Sky City further gambling rights so that the convention centre can be built on the back of problem gamblers …

For attacking scientists, reporters and media …

For the repeated lie that every budget would result in a further 170,000 jobs being created …

For ruling out an increase in GST but then implementing one …

For stuffing up negotiations with Warner Bros, Rio Tinto, SkyCity …

For systematically under funding health …

For deliberately running down state housing stock …

For increased surveillance and “jihadi “brides” fear mongering …

For running down the education system with stupid ideological policies …

For the rising rates of “third world” diseases of poverty and overcrowding …

For claiming that tax cuts were fiscally neutral when they caused Crown debt to escalate …

For wanting to make New Zealand a nirvana for the 1% …

For harassing a waitress (and making us an international laughing stock) …

For the stupid failed “War on P” …

For wasting $26m on a failed vanity flag referendum …

For suspending local democracy in Canterbury …

For the creation of the working poor …

For under funding mental health and the highest suicide rates ever …

For claiming that he would apply higher Ministerial standards but then allowing Murray McCully to complete #sheepgate …

For destroying New Zealand’s ability to respond to climate change …

For the fiasco of private prisons …

For taxing paperboys and girls …

For forcing the TPP down our throats …

For turning your back on meaningful refugee increases …

For trying to use tax payer money to pay your Bradley Ambrose payout …

For destroying so many of our waterways in the name of intensified dairying …

For sheltering ministers who have been incompetent and worse …

For lying habitually about everything …

And for all that – achieving nothing of vision or significance …

Arise Sir John.

261 comments on “Arise Sir John ”

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  1. Ed 1
    5 June 2017 at 7:26 am

    Adds a whole new meaning to the word honour.

  2. Janet 2
    5 June 2017 at 7:42 am

    And Peter Thiel – how much?

  3. One Anonymous Bloke 3
    5 June 2017 at 7:48 am

    …on a recommendation by Our Prime Minister of New Zealand or a Minister of the Crown deputising for Our Prime Minister, to cancel and annul the appointment of any person to this Order, and thereupon the name of such person in the Register shall be erased and the insignia of his or her membership in the Order returned…

    Statutes of the New Zealand Order of Merit.

    Just in case anyone was wondering.

    • Blade 3.1
      5 June 2017 at 12:04 pm

      No , I’m not wondering. Shouldn’t you and Mickey be putting your brain trust to work helping Andy find some political traction leading up to the election?

      Whining about John Keys good fortune just reinforces the stereotype perception many voters have of the left being clueless, but nasty, individuals.

      While I enjoy watching you post like a headless chook, not have a serious opposition to challenge National isn’t good for our country, or democracy.

      • One Anonymous Bloke 3.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 1:30 pm

        Why would the leader of the Labour Party want a Green voter with no party affiliations in his brains trust? Why would I even want the job?

        You need to get out more. Or at the very least, stop believing the things Cameron Slater projects onto other people.

      • North 3.1.2
        6 June 2017 at 12:04 am

        @ 3.1 Blade – spouting from the pejorative tent…….brain trust, whining, clueless, nasty, headless chook, enjoy watching…….these being the little ‘word skuds’ fired from said tent by Blade.

        Then we get the holiest trolliest declaration of concern. Ask yourselves…….

  4. Wayne 4
    5 June 2017 at 7:57 am

    A petty post by The Standard, typical though.

    I am sure you know all long serving PM’s get knighthoods or ONZ.

    • tc 4.1
      5 June 2017 at 8:00 am

      Care to challenge mickeys list wayne or produce your own ? Provide substance for the title hes been given wayne.

      • The decrypter 4.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 8:37 am

        Wayne is just hoping something now can, and will soon trickle down to him. Wayne, holder of ———–and the———-

      • Marcus Morris 4.1.2
        5 June 2017 at 10:15 pm

        Hi TC. He won’t of course because he can’t. And the list in the post doesn’t even mention Auckland’s chronic traffic congestion. For eight years Key refused to admit to a problem or offer a solution. He refused to countenance the prospect of tolls and now, would you believe it, Bridges is saying that a congestion tax or something similar is being seriously considered. Talk about fiddling while Rome burned!!!

        • tc 4.1.2.1
          6 June 2017 at 8:51 am

          They were well aware of the consequences of their inaction.

          Dont confuse not understanding for not giving a F, they knew exactly what they were doing and now the emporer has departed the court jesters get to run it till election.

    • Ed 4.2
      5 June 2017 at 8:00 am

      Other acts of service by Key.
      Making the rich of New Zealand richer.
      Much appreciated by the rich.

      John Key.
      For the few at the expense of the many.

    • Matthew Whitehead 4.3
      5 June 2017 at 8:02 am

      Shouldn’t they actually have to earn it?

      John Key has no achievements of note, even if you’re a supporter of his. I’m not saying we need to take it away from him, but we should rethink the tradition for future Prime Ministers IMO. Being a former Prime Minister should itself be honour enough for anyone who’s served.

      • greywarshark 4.3.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:02 am

        Being a former Prime Minister – and well paid by comparison to the NZ median.
        If one takes a drop in salary, then one is doing one’s patriotic duty for the good of the nation etc. And doesn’t need a bloody knighthood for it.

    • Keith 4.4
      5 June 2017 at 8:04 am

      Who next, Sir John Gotti, Sir Bernie Madhoff, Sir Charles Ponzi?

      • Rae 4.4.1
        5 June 2017 at 8:10 am

        They have a certain “ring” about them, do they not, especially Sir Charles Ponzi.

    • AB 4.5
      5 June 2017 at 8:16 am

      “Petty” = “not sycophantic” in Wayne’s alternative dictionary.

    • Carolyn_nth 4.6
      5 June 2017 at 8:18 am

      And it was John Key who reinstated knighthoods, knowing he would get one when he ceased to become PM.

    • mickysavage 4.7
      5 June 2017 at 8:22 am

      How about David Lange or Geoffrey Palmer?

      And was Jenny Shipley a long serving PM?

      • Phil Morgan 4.7.1
        5 June 2017 at 12:50 pm

        mickysavage, while I applaud your sentiment, you may not be aware, but David Lange refused all attempts to give him a knighthood. He stated he was one of the people and would remain just that. He did not like “special titles” being applied just because people were doing a task they were voted in to do by the great public of our fair nation. NEW ZEALAND, the best little country in the world.

        • Matthew Whitehead 4.7.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 3:23 pm

          David Lange (like Helen Clark) was awarded the ONZ, Phil, which is the non-titular equivalent of the same honour, so his convictions, like Clark’s or Bolger’s, don’t really relate to Wayne’s original point.

          Micky’s point is presumably about what counts for length of tenure, as for instance Palmer was only a PM for a single year. Lange was in for 5, which is more arguable, and Jenny Shipley was in for two.

          I think it’s a fair point that arguably neither Palmer nor Shipley really deserved an honour either if we’re going to apply a “John Key test” to former PMs getting honours, and Wayne’s point about “long-standing” is rather arbitrary to apply. It seems to more be a thing that all recent Prime Ministers get the gong next time their party is in power if not sooner. Even Mike Moore has an ONZ, and he was only PM for a couple months.

        • mickysavage 4.7.1.2
          5 June 2017 at 7:54 pm

          Im aware of that Phil. Hence the comment!

    • One Anonymous Bloke 4.8
      5 June 2017 at 8:24 am

      The Standard is a machine: it can’t post anything. The author’s name is at top.

      Key has always been an incredibly divisive figure. He brought international shame and ridicule upon us in his Hard Talk interview, for me though the final straw was the discovery of the ratfucking gang that he ran out of his office.

      It takes a special kind of person to worship at the Temple of Market while families go without basic necessities like food and shelter, but most of the time you can put it down to stupidity and incompetence, the Just World fallacy, and so forth. Not so with Key. Dirty Politics confirmed his calculated malevolence.

      Honour him all you like. At the end of the day he’s “up” there with Mr. Peter Talley.

    • marty mars 4.9
      5 June 2017 at 8:41 am

      Yours is the petty post wayne – only ego and weakness makes you wail at the weather.

    • Ed 4.10
      5 June 2017 at 8:57 am

      Wayne sprays and walks way like his idol Key.

      • Infused 4.10.1
        5 June 2017 at 9:02 am

        Who would try to discuss anything with you lot? You’re a rabbid mob with pitch forks.

        [Read the post. Point out where it is wrong. Argue your point. Debating the post is fine. Spray and walk away is not – MS]

        • Ed 4.10.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 9:06 am

          It’s ok you don’t need to.
          Cameron Slater’s site is your natural home.

          • Infused 4.10.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 9:16 am

            Slater is only slightly worse than you lot

            • Ed 4.10.1.1.1.1
              5 June 2017 at 9:28 am

              “Who would try to discuss anything with you lot? You’re a rabbid mob with pitch forks.”

              You appear to be contradicting yourself.

              • infused …
                5 June 2017 at 1:32 pm

                Not in the slightest.

                • One Anonymous Bloke …
                  5 June 2017 at 9:09 pm

                  Your walk doesn’t quite live up to your talk. Who would try and discuss it with us? Well you, for example.

                  Hence the contradiction. Don’t mention it.

    • SpaceMonkey 4.11
      5 June 2017 at 9:02 am

      There’s nothing petty about that list. For many in NZ it’s all too real. I couldn’t give a rats arse if the awarding of a knighthood is tradition. It highlights clearly just how devoid of any real meaning the title has become.

    • Anne 4.12
      5 June 2017 at 9:36 am

      I am sure you know all long serving PM’s get knighthoods or ONZ.

      You know we all know. Cut a bit of slack Wayne. The Nats do the same on their blog-sites eg. Kiwiblog and Whale Oil. Your lot are no better and anyway a great deal of it is true!

      • Wayne 4.12.1
        5 June 2017 at 11:18 am

        Anne,

        It was John Key who gave Helen Clark the ONZ.

        In my view the commenters on this site are being pathetically petulant. Entirely predictable.

        • One Anonymous Bloke 4.12.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 11:26 am

          “Entirely predictable”

          You see? Even Wayne has noticed how divisive Key is. He doesn’t understand it, but at least he’s noticed.

        • Hanswurst 4.12.1.2
          5 June 2017 at 12:01 pm

          Helen Clark ran an independent foreign policy against considerable pressure to invade Iraq on what turned out to be false pretexts; she put political weight behind the arts and culture as a central plank of NZ society; she presided over the creation of KiwiBank and (re-)establishment of KiwiRail; her government lifted the incomes of many poorer families with Working for Families; that government also changed the attitudes of the nation towards saving with KiwiSaver and the Superannuation Fund. Whether you think these were misguided, too weak, middle-class welfare dressed up as aid to the poor nad disenfranchised, or too far-reaching, they represented a big shift in national attitudes towards the role of elected representatives vs. private interests in addressing the welfare and values of a community.

          What did Key do to warrant a knighthood, in your opinion?

          • greywarshark 4.12.1.2.1
            6 June 2017 at 9:44 am

            Thanks Hanswurst
            It is good to see Helen Clark’s actions noted and your point that various groups see them in different ways and often no-one praises them, yet ‘they represented a big shift in national attitudes towards the role of elected reps”.
            It was a move away from leaving everything to the market and abandoning thoughtful, responsible planning and we should remember it as positive.

        • Matthew Whitehead 4.12.1.3
          5 June 2017 at 3:26 pm

          Sure, but every other title given to a PM in recent history has been by their own party. I think a much better convention would be that you don’t give the gong to your own former PMs- leave the opposition to do it if they really deserve honouring.

    • greywarshark 4.13
      5 June 2017 at 9:58 am

      Wayne
      Can that change? No. Anything might be done, but nothing should be done for the first time (without an extensive report by a specially chosen commission.)

    • Draco T Bastard 4.14
      5 June 2017 at 10:10 am

      I am sure you know all long serving PM’s get knighthoods or ONZ.

      And they shouldn’t. After all, they’re just doing their job.

      And then I’m really going to have to call for citations. After all

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_McCombs
      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Holland
      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Semple
      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judy_Keall
      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Duynhoven

      It really doesn’t seem that all long serving MPs get knighthoods or ONZs.

    • The New Student 4.15
      5 June 2017 at 10:38 am

      I’m sorry you find the above list “petty” Wayne.

      Meanwhile in NZ, that list is our daily lives.

      But as long as the perpetrator gets his knighthood, it’s all good eh?

    • Incognito 4.16
      5 June 2017 at 10:43 am

      So, is this a fringe benefit or one of the baubles of power?

      John Key felt honoured to be the Right Honourable PM of NZ and now feels honoured to receive an Honour for this? That’s just too much honour for one person; a humble would crumble under all that honour bestowed on him/her.

      Honi soit qui mal y pense

      • greywarshark 4.16.1
        5 June 2017 at 11:05 am

        I love alliteration. ‘A humble would crumble’ under such weighty honours.

        But if we had a true knight – I think of what he might sing like He Who Would Valiant Be written by John Bunyan in Pilgrim’s Progress, 1684.

        (Bunyan served 12 years in prison for refusing to serve the official state church. We are still fighting battles against imposed religion, ie neoliberal economics – which actually started on the 300th year anniversary of the Pilgrim’s Progress.)

        He who would Valiant Be.

        (original words)
        Who would true valour see,
        Let him come hither;
        One here will constant be,
        Come wind, come weather
        There’s no discouragement
        Shall make him once relent
        His first avowed intent
        To be a pilgrim.

        Whoso beset him round
        With dismal stories
        Do but themselves confound;
        His strength the more is.
        No lion can him fright,
        He’ll with a giant fight,
        He will have a right
        To be a pilgrim.

        Hobgoblin nor foul fiend
        Can daunt his spirit,
        He knows he at the end
        Shall life inherit.
        Then fancies fly away,
        He’ll fear not what men say,
        He’ll labor night and day
        To be a pilgrim.

        http://www.hymntime.com/tch/htm/h/e/w/hewhowvb.htm

        • Incognito 4.16.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 7:07 pm

          It’s a very good hymn and loved & liked by people spanning pretty much the complete political spectrum it seems; universal truth & values can be ‘interpreted’ in many ways, which makes you think …

    • Stuart Munro 4.17
      5 June 2017 at 1:25 pm

      Perhaps it’s true Wayne – but should they?

      Honours are supposed to reflect a real contribution, not a sleazy political backhander.

      Of course, as a long-serving Gnat trougher your own omission must grate.

      For my part I want to see people who’ve earned respect honoured – folk like Sir Ed or Fred Hollows.

      As general rule our politicians do not earn public respect and hence do not deserve honours.

    • rhinocrates 4.18
      5 June 2017 at 1:33 pm

      I am sure you know all SELF serving PM’s get knighthoods or ONZ

      FIFY

      How in any way does a hack and a leech compare to Edmund Hillary or Fred Hollows?

    • Dialey 4.19
      5 June 2017 at 2:55 pm

      But he did not complete his term of office

    • rhinocrates 4.20
      5 June 2017 at 7:59 pm

      “Petty” is lusting after these silly decorations and thinking that one is owed them and is owed respect for having them.

      • One Anonymous Bloke 4.20.1
        5 June 2017 at 8:06 pm

        According to BM, the motivation is purely monetary: adds a few k to your speaking engagement and directors fees, impresses dictators, makes you more likely to be chosen as a mouthpiece.

        That sort of thing.

  5. tc 5
    5 June 2017 at 7:57 am

    As expected, throughs titles and sinecures dished out to the hollowmen and helpers.

  6. Keith 6
    5 June 2017 at 7:59 am

    Sir Michael Jones, ex rugby man, card carrying National Party man, former Nat candidate and probable future one.

    Dame Julie Christie for making shitloads out of shit TV, very close ties to the National Party and an awesome job on Keys flag committee that wasted 10’s of millions and gave us a tea towel, that got binned anyway.

    And the deceitful fuck Key.

    Knighthoods are now plumbing the bottom of the cesspool at subterranean levels.

    Hosking cannot be far off!

    • Karen 6.1
      5 June 2017 at 8:41 am

      “Hosking cannot be far off!”

      Another incentive to change the government.

      • greywarshark 6.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:27 am

        Knights Dames
        There is nothing like a Dame – if it is Michelle Boag that is! She could be next. Indefatigable for the Gnashionals. And a hide like a rhinoceros. Formidable. Female warrior to put Xena in the shade.

        Has she already got one? It’s not the sort of thing that I notice, as the really deserving got swamped by the ‘I’ve got a cunning plan’ types.

    • Ed 6.2
      5 June 2017 at 8:43 am

      Jones cares so much about Pacific Islanders’ health he brought in another fast food franchise to New Zealand.

      • BM 6.2.1
        5 June 2017 at 8:48 am

        An impressive display of that patronising paternalistic attitude left wingers are well known for.

        Well done Paul.

        • Ed 6.2.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 9:01 am

          So you think more fast food joints are good for NZers health, bm?
          You think are health stats are good?
          And do we just solve the problem by hoping the market will fix it?

          Did you benefit financially from Key’s tax cuts for the rich?

          Key.
          For the few.
          Not the many.

          • Infused 6.2.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 9:05 am

            How about people control themselves eh. Let’s stop car imports because cars stop you walking. That’s how dumb your argument is.

            • Ed 6.2.1.1.1.1
              5 June 2017 at 9:08 am

              It seems like you want to engage.
              Please be consistent.
              Why does Key deserve an honour, troll?

            • One Anonymous Bloke 6.2.1.1.1.2
              5 June 2017 at 9:09 am

              People don’t control themselves. Look at Jason Ede or Cameron Slater or Richard Worth.

              Let’s pretend we live on Planet Self Control. That’s how dumb your argument is.

              • Infused …
                5 June 2017 at 9:17 am

                The left to the rescue. Let’s tell everyone how to live their lives!

                • One Anonymous Bloke …
                  5 June 2017 at 9:29 am

                  It’s almost as though ridiculous hyperbole is the extent of your capabilities.

                  How about people control themselves eh.

                  Oh look, there’s Infused telling people how to live their lives.

                  🙄

                  • infused …
                    5 June 2017 at 1:34 pm

                    Except im not

                    • One Anonymous Bloke …
                      5 June 2017 at 8:18 pm

                      Yeah, you really are. Behind your wish that “people control themselves” is a whole heap of right wing assumption and prejudice, thinly veiled racism, the “personal responsibility” myth.

                      Meanwhile, on Earth, the right is more than happy to regulate where it suits them. To curtail workers’ rights to assembly and expression, for example. To outlaw protest at sea.

                      Regulations are the very essence of rules for life. It’s illegal to put certain substances in food. It’s illegal to lie about ingredients. The sale of alcohol is heavily regulated because of its effects upon health.

                      Ed made the perfectly valid observation that the costs of junk food can be seen in the health budget too. If you don’t think any sort of government intervention is warranted you’re going to need a better argument than hyperbolic flailing.

                • ropata …
                  5 June 2017 at 7:01 pm

                  neolib cries “nanny state”
                  when there’s a law they want to break
                  get rid of annoying regulation
                  lets have total exploitation

            • Ed 6.2.1.1.1.3
              5 June 2017 at 9:13 am

              And let’s look at Key himself.
              He really showed self-control when he assaulted the waitress at the cafe several times.

    • Patricia 6.3
      5 June 2017 at 12:21 pm

      Michael Jones – who opened a Carl’s Junior outlet in an area where obesity is a major issue.

    • mary_a 6.4
      5 June 2017 at 3:09 pm

      @ Keith (6) … Wouldn’t be at all surprised to see Hosking receive an “honour” for “services” to the Natz. Now that would contribute to dredging the sewer for recipients, which seems to be the game at present.

      Definitely a Natz gong weekend …. pass the bucket please, I’m about to retch!

    • swordfish 6.5
      5 June 2017 at 3:53 pm

      Keith “Hosking cannot be far off !”

      As I’ve said many times before – Why oh Why must you always be so RUDE to Sir Michael ???

      https://thestandard.org.nz/morning-report-up-mike-hosking-down/#comment-1328706

  7. Penny Bright 7
    5 June 2017 at 8:07 am

    I’m sure the families of Afghan civilians killed in Operation Burnham will be very impressed with the knighting of former NZ Prime Minister John Key – who authorised this ‘operation’.

    • Zid 7.1
      8 June 2017 at 1:22 pm

      [deleted]

      [Provisional one day ban for attacking a commentator. The ban may be extended. Check back here to find out – Decision is one week] – Bill.

  8. Pete George 8
    5 June 2017 at 8:07 am

    I’m very much in the Helen Clark and Richie McCaw camps when it comes to titles, I think they are a pretentious cringe.

    But using the awarding of a gong in an all out attack like this seems a bit petty to me. I’ve seen as bad against Clark at times, but on the occasion I think it’s inappropriate.

    • BM 8.1
      5 June 2017 at 8:27 am

      They’re highly respected overseas and open many doors, which is probably why Key restored them.

      It’s also why pretty much everyone took the opportunity to convert their order of merit awards into Knighthoods or Damehoods.

      In 2009, Prime Minister John Key restored the honours to their pre-April 2000 state. Principal Companions and Distinguished Companions (85 people in total) were given the option to convert their awards into Knighthoods or Damehoods.The option has been taken up by 72 of those affected, including rugby great Colin Meads.[19] Former Labour MP Margaret Shields was one of those who accepted a Damehood, despite receiving a letter from former Prime Minister Helen Clark “setting out why Labour had abolished the titles and saying she hoped she would not accept one”. Clark’s senior deputy, Michael Cullen, also accepted a knighthood.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Zealand_Order_of_Merit#Controversy

      • One Anonymous Bloke 8.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 8:39 am

        They’re highly respected overseas and open many doors

        So it’s a big monetary reward as well as an intervention in the market. Classy.

      • Ed 8.1.2
        5 June 2017 at 9:03 am

        That’ll add to Key’s after dinner speaking fees.
        How convenient.

        Such an honourable man.

      • Draco T Bastard 8.1.3
        5 June 2017 at 10:17 am

        They’re highly respected overseas and open many doors, which is probably why Key restored them.

        I’d agree with that.

        And that is, of course, one reason why MPs shouldn’t get them for simply doing their job.

    • Wainwright 8.2
      5 June 2017 at 9:57 am

      “An all out attack” you mean a factual list of things Key did in his time as PM? How terrible, if you understood it you might have to form an opinion on something for once.

    • Draco T Bastard 8.3
      5 June 2017 at 10:18 am

      Telling the truth is an attack?

      You live in a strange, corrupt, world. Must be Planet Key.

      • Pete George 8.3.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:27 am

        I could tell the truth about you that would be an attack, but it wouldn’t be appropriate here.

        • Draco T Bastard 8.3.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 10:37 am

          No, it would just be the truth – unless you were telling lies.

          Of course, you don’t actually know me or anything that I’ve done which means that you’d only be able to lie.

        • fender 8.3.1.2
          5 June 2017 at 9:05 pm

          “I could tell the truth about you that would be an attack,….”

          So you just satisfy your nasty little self by suggesting there’s something unsavoury to attack him with. Nice way to smear your opponent Pete, did Lusk and Slater teach you that?

  9. Philj 9
    5 June 2017 at 8:09 am

    Sorry to point out the typo in the heading. There is no ‘i’ needed in ‘ARISE, John Key.’

  10. Rae 10
    5 June 2017 at 8:12 am

    Arise Sir Spray and Walk Away

    • miravox 10.1
      5 June 2017 at 9:50 am

      That’s one option. The NZ Herald story has him saying:

      I suspect they’ll stick with John

      I prefer to stick with ‘that sleazy, lying, creep’

  11. Stunned mullet 11
    5 June 2017 at 8:18 am

    Wah wah wah

  12. Carolyn_nth 12
    5 June 2017 at 8:19 am

    Surgeon Key. The anesthetic was strong enough, most folk didn’t notice the deep cuts.

  13. Kevin 13
    5 June 2017 at 8:34 am

    Bill gets the leadership, John gets his gong.
    This is how deals are made.

  14. Ed 14
    5 June 2017 at 8:47 am

    So one reason Key got his award was better relationships with the US?
    A servile one, where we bow down to US corporates, send our troops into harms way for US imperial wars and allow US spy agencies to intrude on our civil liberties.

    All such honourable actions.

  15. JustMe 15
    5 June 2017 at 8:49 am

    Only early last year John Key tried to influence NZers into voting for a flag change. He no longer wanted to see the Union Jack on the NZ flag. And so he wasted $26million of NZ taxpayers money on one of his vanity projects. I am pleased that NZers back then saw the light of day that this guy is nothing short of an opportunistic self-serving ratbag(and that is ONLY a nice word to describe him).
    Last year he showed his hatred of NZers who protested against the TPPA by referring to them as ‘Rent of protestor/mob’. Those words showed his disdain for the population and a country that he has hardly been in.In fact whilst he was a student in NZ it was the NZ taxpayers that paid for his(and Paula Bennett’s) education and housing.
    Key is on record as saying he loves everything about America. Which to means he cannot say the same thing about NZ. In all relationships whether they be personal or for business purposes one cannot love something more than another. And for John Key he loves America more than he hates NZ and NZers. America is his love(forget about his wife and children by the way)as that is where most of his money is from and is held.
    The best thing Key ever did in his time in politics was when he quit politics. He and his cronies have caused so much damage since 2008 that I am sure many NZers would look at them and feel the vomit rising in their guts.
    The knighthoods of late(meaning over the past 8 or so years)have been handed out like a lolly-scramble to rich former politicians with close National Party links. Either that or rich businesspeople who have donated heavily to the political party of the government of the day.
    I doubt we will ever hear of a little poor person who does voluntary work and is perhaps better known and respected around NZ than say John Key, Doug Graham etc,etc,etc; getting a knighthood. And so that proves to me knighthoods can be bought here in NZ if enough money passes hands.

  16. Kay 16
    5 June 2017 at 9:04 am

    According to RNZ he’s “humbled to receive it…” (8am news)

    Yeah right.

    • Ed 16.1
      5 June 2017 at 9:10 am

      Key doesn’t know what the word humble means.

      • JustMe 16.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:38 am

        Ed. Bang on and so correct.
        Being humble doesn’t exist in John Key’s vocabulary. It’s an alien word. He(Key)may as well send Nick Smith(after too much paint thinner swilling moments but lets blame someone else but Nick Smith) out to an “Auckland suburb”(aka as a traffic island) to show the NZ media a potential housing estate.
        To be in the running for a knighthood one has to give about a years’ notice. Key resigned from being pm 7 months ago.
        Which brings up the question of exactly how much money changed hands for Key to be instantly obtaining the unworthy accolade as being addressed as a ‘sir’ in front of his name?
        Money has changed hands and that is all knighthoods today(2008 to 2017) seems to require.
        A year ago Key was indicated to all and sundry as wanting a 4th term National government. Which indicates a year ago he was grooming himself for a knighthood. All too convenient but also at NZ taxpayers expense as he enjoyed a couple of back dated pay increases between now(June 2017) and December 2017(his ‘instant resignation’).
        Out of all this we all know there is no honesty applied to NZers when it comes to politicians who are only in the job for THEIR own egos and knighthoods. It’s a shame somewhere along the way to the road of EGO they forget who are their true employers in this instance NZers.

        • Linda S 16.1.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 7:35 pm

          JustMe. Hit the nail on the head. A year ago Key was indicated to all and sundry as wanting a 4th term National government. Which indicates a year ago he was grooming himself for a knighthood.

  17. Stuart Mathieson 17
    5 June 2017 at 9:10 am

    A petition that indicated internationally that this is not a popular award might be interesting.

  18. Ross 18
    5 June 2017 at 9:30 am

    I am sure you know all long serving PM’s get knighthoods or ONZ.

    Yes, Wayne, except Key was an MP in March and now he’s been knighted. Talk about unseemly haste. Though of course it’s not quite as quick as Muldoon awarding himself a knighthood while he was PM!

    But given that it can take more than 6 months from nomination to receiving a gong, it’s possible that Key was nominated while still PM. What was the rush?

    • Kevin 18.1
      5 June 2017 at 11:51 am

      Key is no fool.

      He knows that with a change of government at the end of the year there is a good chance that his bauble will never happen and as someone ‘who wanted to be PM’, he would have been well aware of the perks that come with leaving the job.

      He probably wanted the knighthood as much as being PM.

      Strange little man.

      • Zid 18.1.1
        8 June 2017 at 1:23 pm

        I don’t think the latest polls are suggesting a change of government – wishful thinking perhaps?

    • mary_a 18.2
      5 June 2017 at 6:10 pm

      @ Ross (18) … I always thought a PM had to serve three full terms in the position before receiving a knighthood. Key didn’t complete his third term.

      Still waiting for the reason for his abrupt resignation at the end of last year, when he was telling people he’s ready to take the Natz to the election in 2017 for a fourth term!

      A rush to resign and a rush to get knighted, despite him not completing his third term as PM! Nothing adds up!

  19. RRM 19
    5 June 2017 at 9:31 am

    Thanks Sir JK for ending Clark and Cullen’s spendthrift ways that had us with a structural deficit and on track for bankrupcy like Greece.

    Thanks Sir JK and keeping our country afloat through the GFC without really cutting any core services.

    Thanks for increeasing benefits, health funding and education funding.

    Thanks for moving to settle Treaty Claims faster than the RACIST labour Govt that stole the foreshore & seabed.

    Thanks for not drawing your huge PM salary, an example the leader of the opposition has surely followed. (HA HA! As if…)

    [Inflamatory and frankly untrue not to mention defamatory. Deleted. – MS]

    Thanks for drawing out the absolutely insane little haters, watching them spew their hate even as they struggled to explain what you’d done to them, was hilarious. Apparently you can’t be trusted and it was always what you were ABOUT to do, not anything you’ve actually DONE.

    If I were you I would have said “stuff these ungrateful cnuts!” and gone back to the money-making sector after 12 months of that abuse tops. Thanks for taking a massive pay cut to serve our country.

    Love you bro (no homo)

    RRM

    • One Anonymous Bloke 19.1
      5 June 2017 at 9:36 am

      Your first little outburst makes you look like an ignorant fool.

      As for the rest, an ignorant fool says what?

    • Ross 19.2
      5 June 2017 at 9:42 am

      Not sure if that’s satire. Either way, it needs more effort.

    • Ed 19.3
      5 June 2017 at 9:43 am

      For someone complaining about haters, this is a very angry post.

      • greywarshark 19.3.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:16 am

        RRM
        Try caring about other people and their wish to have the opportunity for a good life and living conditions and don’t dump your crud on our parade thanks.

        The purpose of the whole blog is for thinking, lively, critical debate. And if people aren’t angry about the state of NZ and the way that people have been made vulnerable to zombie economics, and then virtually ignored, then they don’t get the point of the blog. People aren’t here to sit on their patios watching the parade go by, they are in the parade and it’s actually a protest trying to get an uncaring, irresponsible set of people in the driving seat to take action to avoid damaging the country and people further.

        And sometimes the protesters get run down and damaged by those in the driving seat. We are seriously worried here, and hate to see what is happening to NZ, the satisfaction with the status quo by people who only care about money and their own comfort and security, and their refusal to offer better opportunities for improvement of conditions to those without security and comfort. Anger is the result.

        • RRM 19.3.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 12:23 pm

          What?

          It isn’t 1917.

          In New Zealand if you can’t make it on your own the government just pumps you full of unlimited free stuff week after week ’till the day you die.

          Overall Key has SLIGHTLY INCREASED the amount of free stuff that productive working people have to pump into those who can’t stand on their own feet. Labour people would be proud if their party had done exactly the same.

          But for some reason, Sir JK made it easier than ever before for those who slurp on the free money tit, to feel morally ok about demanding the free money tit should be even more generous.

          Slurp slurp!

          Key lied!

          Slurp slurp.

          War on the poor!

          Slurp slurp.

          Bene ONLY went up $25!

          Slurp slurp.

          3,000,000,000,000 children in “poverty”! Where’s their free stuff eh John Key?

          Slurp slurp.

          Vote health spending ONLY increased 11% per capita!

          Slurp slurp.

          No you CAN’T agree a free trade deal that might grow our economy to pay for my slurping!

          Slurp slurp.

          No you CAN’T explore for oil or gas that would pay for my slurping!

          Slurp slurp..

          • One Anonymous Bloke 19.3.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 3:39 pm

            Saudi sheep farm.
            Unemployment doubled since 2007.
            Massive hypocrite RRM outed as a piece of shit who advocates sexual violence against women.

          • Stuart Munro 19.3.1.1.2
            5 June 2017 at 6:35 pm

            Solid Energy and SCF bankrupted so John and his accessories could loot their assets. State housing and Landcorp too. And you’re trying to shift the blame for slurping away from the vampire squid.

            Disingenuous and stupid.

          • Rae 19.3.1.1.3
            6 June 2017 at 4:22 pm

            And then there is the not making any effort whatsoever to dispel the myth that he donated all of his Prime Ministerial salary to charity, because he did not, he did donate some, but as it has never been made clear how much, the assumption must be, buggar all. He has been quite happy to allow the deluded to carry on thinking that he did donate all.

      • North 19.3.2
        5 June 2017 at 10:28 am

        A noticeably strange ending, for another thing.

        The Alex Jones rave completed there’s a gratuitious…..excessively pointed…..claim to heterosexuality. What’s that unnecessary declaration about……’Big Fulla’ ?

        Get back.

        • greywarshark 19.3.3.1
          5 June 2017 at 10:48 am

          joe 90
          I’m confused. What does the link refer to? Who is ‘he’?

        • RRM 19.3.3.2
          5 June 2017 at 4:59 pm

          LOL… Here’s that song that’s “not” about killing Key and “not” about raping his daughter, in case you’ve forgotten:

          That’s why I’m going to kill the Prime Minister. I’m going to kill the Prime Minister, because we are down and suffering and the motherfucker ain’t doing nothing. Going to kill the Prime Minister.

          One of these days I’m going to fuck your daughter. This poor boy going to make his seed, going to wake up in your girl – well hello Miss Key.

          You might remember this was at the same time as the left were screaming RAPE CULTURE like blue murder.

          But poor old Ruby Sycophant-Snowflake! The above Rape song was just fine by her when the subject is Stephanie Key, daughter of the great satan… but OH how she squealed when her name was substituted in. The classic leftist, no principles at all, just straight lust for power and influence, anyone is fair game in tribal warfare. Just not her.

          • One Anonymous Bloke 19.3.3.2.1
            5 June 2017 at 7:15 pm

            “She did it too!”

            Personal responsibility means it’s not rapey RRM’s fault.

    • Draco T Bastard 19.4
      5 June 2017 at 10:29 am

      Thanks Sir JK for ending Clark and Cullen’s spendthrift ways that had us with a structural deficit and on track for bankrupcy like Greece.

      That is, of course, a lie.

      1. Labour did have a budget to address the GFC
      2. We’re now far closer to bankruptcy because of National’s spending
      3. Countries can’t actually go bankrupt

      Thanks Sir JK and keeping our country afloat through the GFC without really cutting any core services.

      That’s another lie – he cut them to the bone so as to give tax cuts to the rich.

      Thanks for increeasing benefits, health funding and education funding.

      Another lie. Health and education funding has been cut in real terms and benefits haven’t gone up except for a few people here and there.

      Thanks for moving to settle Treaty Claims faster than the RACIST labour Govt that stole the foreshore & seabed.

      Another lie. There was decades of work going into those Treaty claims. They didn’t suddenly get done because of either Key or National.

      If I were you I would have said “stuff these ungrateful cnuts!” and gone back to the money-making sector after 12 months of that abuse tops. Thanks for taking a massive pay cut to serve our country.

      I doubt if he took a pay cut at all. I’m pretty sure that the people he was actually working for ensured that he was well paid and that his wealth increased while he did their dirty work for them.

    • Kevin 19.5
      5 June 2017 at 11:53 am

      “Thanks for not drawing your huge PM salary, an example the leader of the opposition has surely followed. (HA HA! As if…)”

      —

      I guess if you believe that, you can believe anything. Throwing urban myths into the commentary does nothing for your cause.

      • North 19.5.1
        6 June 2017 at 12:37 am

        This donating the salary bizo was always vaunted quite early on but then it died down…….no one was strutting it anymore……like no one really believed it anyway. Same re the crapola – “I don’t recall where I was on the ’81 tour”. Everyone knows it’s bullshit but what can you say ? I reckon he probably donates three hundy a year or so anyway. As an extremely wealthy man whom so loves Kiwis might. So tie that to the PM salary……..”Awwhh nice guy !” That’s it. Betcha’.

    • Halfcrown 19.6
      5 June 2017 at 1:13 pm

      Are you taking the piss? If so I suggest you put /sarc after your comment.

    • Zid 19.7
      8 June 2017 at 1:26 pm

      Couldn’t have put it better myself, sad (and funny) to see Key derangement syndrome is still alive and well on the left

  20. Neil 20
    5 June 2017 at 9:49 am

    Arise Slur John.
    #SlurJohn

  21. John 21
    5 June 2017 at 9:51 am

    Key played the long game on this one. Eight years. Makes a mockery of these titles. Lets ditch them. Happy to to keep the other awards for those in the community who do the hard graft but rename them from QSO and QSM to NZSO and NZSM. I always knew he was going to knight himself or get his mates to do it for him. Was that that of his exit strategy? I think so. Bloody greedy 1%ers make me sick.

    • Ed 21.1
      5 June 2017 at 9:55 am

      And the nasty little trolls who speak for them

    • Ross 21.2
      5 June 2017 at 10:00 am

      John,

      You make a valid point. If Labour becomes the next Government in Sept, they will be under no obligation to give anyone a gong and might even abolish the honours. John Key might have had a long wait under Labour. By resigning when he did, he knew that his mates would look after him.

  22. saveNZ 22
    5 June 2017 at 10:00 am

    Vomit.

  23. Carolyn_nth 23
    5 June 2017 at 10:00 am

    An Instagram cartoon by slanecartoons :

    That a knighthood would be some day given to John Key was widely seen as inevitable from the time his government reinstated titles to the NZ …

    …For outstanding…”

    • greywarshark 23.1
      5 June 2017 at 10:19 am

      First trivial comment:
      I didn’t think the Queen was very smartly dressed. Looks frumpish.

  24. Grey Area 24
    5 June 2017 at 10:06 am

    This day was coming from the moment Key reinstated titular honours. So I reconciled myself to this ages ago.

    The one good thing I see with it is that it shows how dishonorable the honours system is.

    Hopefully more people will see from the standard of the people getting higher honours that the system has no credibility. People like Key being awarded under it deserve no respect and awards like his detract from other good people doing good for their communities also being recognised.

    The Knight and Dame titles are a cringeworthy anachronism. I may be tilting at windmills but I refuse to use either when referring to anyone with those titles.

    • garibaldi 24.1
      5 June 2017 at 11:04 am

      Perhaps if we were presented with Dame Paula Bennett the whole system could implode by popular uprising?

  25. Ad 25
    5 June 2017 at 10:16 am

    It would be better to replace the highest awards with a contestable fund of bonuses against criteria.

    Like a Chief Executive, except the people fire the elected ones.

  26. mlpc 26
    5 June 2017 at 10:23 am

    Yeah, yeah, yeah, we all know that Sir John hated poor people and was only concerned for his rich mates, but how about some intelligent analysis of how he manged to get elected three times.

    [How about you read many of the 20,000 posts on the site that address this – MS]

    Do we all think that voters are stupid? And what does it say about the quality of Labour’s leaders?

    And why do the IMF and OECD rate the NZ economy so highly, compared to most other advanced economies?

    • Ed 26.1
      5 June 2017 at 10:28 am

      He was elected in 3 times because
      A. The corporate media supported him 100% providing propaganda about Key that people still repeat today.
      B The opposition parties do not offer an alternative to neoliberalism.

      • mlpc 26.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:43 am

        I’ll buy B, but not A.

        The left thinks the media are right wing, and the right thinks the media are left wing. It would be interesting to see an analysis of the leanings of journalists, but I would be surprised if it showed strong bias either way.

        • garibaldi 26.1.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 11:13 am

          Show us where there is left wing media in NZ mlpc, then describe the exposure it gets compared to the plethora of right wing owned media and right wing dominated State media. There is strong bias to the right in State owned media …. try explain Hosking’s role at TVNZ for starters.

          • mlpc 26.1.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 11:41 am

            “Show us where there is left wing media in NZ …”

            Here you go, garibaldi: https://yournz.org/2017/04/16/media-bias-nz-updated/

            The state-owned radio station is left wing. Who would have guessed where John Campbell’s sympathies lie?

            Also interesting to note that all our major newspapers and largest news websites are rated “Mainstream (minimal partisan bias)”. Still, if you only read a “Hyper-partisan Left” blog, it’s no wonder you see the world differently.

            • garibaldi 26.1.1.1.1.1
              5 June 2017 at 12:19 pm

              mlpc ,I can’t accept that some people think RNZ is left wing. It has moved so far right since Key got in that the natz are even going to give a little extra funding.
              As for bias in the newspapers, I stopped reading them several years ago because of their heavy right wing bias.
              You bastards just don’t realize how far right we have gone since fucking Roger Douglas et al conned this country with neoliberalism.

            • greywarshark 26.1.1.1.1.2
              5 June 2017 at 2:53 pm

              “The state-owned radio station is left wing. Who would have guessed where John Campbell’s sympathies lie?”

              I think they are just looking into the stories of the day. John Campbell likes to air the hot stories of people being treated unfairly. It just seems to you that he is left wing, because the poor and workers who are usually left, are the most unfairly treated.

              So don’t get excited and fall off your office chair and break a leg. As
              David Lange says the stats show that the left wingers are more likely to suffer injuries and that’s why they need ACC.

            • Molly 26.1.1.1.1.3
              5 June 2017 at 3:34 pm

              Your link is one person making arbitrary distinctions about a series of publications. Not exactly a reliable source to link to.

            • mickysavage 26.1.1.1.1.4
              5 June 2017 at 8:08 pm

              Reality has a left wing bias.

            • One Anonymous Bloke 26.1.1.1.1.5
              5 June 2017 at 8:38 pm

              The state-owned radio station is left wing

              Here’s the source (v 3.0) on Imgur. The author says it’s their “best guess”. So sciency, and truthy too. No wonder you found it at Yawnz.

        • ankerawshark 26.1.1.2
          5 June 2017 at 11:25 am

          There was one done by Claire Robertson at Massey university ( a former staff for Shipley) of coverage of the last election, that found media bias towards Key and the right. To do with the number of photos of the leaders. She should have analysed the “feel” of the photos cause that what have reinforced her results 100+

          Have you considered Mike Hoskings and where he sits on the spectrum?
          What about Audrey Young whose brother is a National MP and whose father was a National MP (actually I do believe its possible for people to have a relative in politics and not be bias, Katie Bradford is a good example)……….But please have a look at Audrey’s columns. Mike, Paddy, Larry, Audrey, Claire, Larry, Leighton, ……….the list goes on. Take a look at what they write and

          • mlpc 26.1.1.2.1
            5 June 2017 at 11:48 am

            Katie Bradford? You mean the Katie Bradford who said this: “No matter what we talk about, no matter what we do, the polls don’t seem to be shifting at all”

            • ankerawshark 26.1.1.2.1.1
              5 June 2017 at 9:44 pm

              If you watch Katie Bradford on a regular basis, she is quite neutral. A one off quote like that, isn’t anything.

            • Zid 26.1.1.2.1.2
              8 June 2017 at 1:28 pm

              BOOM! Corin Dann, Patrick Gower & Duncan Garner also spring to mind as rampant lefties

          • Pete George 26.1.1.2.2
            5 June 2017 at 12:25 pm

            “that found media bias towards Key and the right”

            bias is arguable, but quantity of coverage tends to be biased towards the government and towards the largest party, it happens to have been National for the last 9 years.

            • Stuart Munro 26.1.1.2.2.1
              5 June 2017 at 1:36 pm

              That’s incompetence George.

              A competent media spends more time critiquing the government in power because their actions are more consequential than the opposition’s.

              Remember how Clark hated Campbell? Because he was doing his job.

          • Incognito 26.1.1.2.3
            5 June 2017 at 6:09 pm

            Have you considered Mike Hoskings and where he sits on the spectrum?

            Mike Hosking reckons he’s bluer than blue and a razor sharp gamma ray that cuts through all crap.

            In reality Mike’s brain farts are just hot air and flatulating flux de bouche that also produces a foul fetor that’s reminiscent of crap.

        • North 26.1.1.3
          5 June 2017 at 11:29 am

          MLPC @ 26.1.1 – “…….but I would be surprised if it showed strong bias either way. ”

          Like when John Armstrong demanded Cunliffe’s resignation over a non-existent bottle of wine ?

          Help us out MLPC. Was that ‘strong’ bias or was it ‘mere’ bias ?

      • Rae 26.1.2
        6 June 2017 at 4:25 pm

        And he was wavy and smiley

    • One Anonymous Bloke 26.2
      5 June 2017 at 10:52 am

      Glowing testimonials abound, you say?

      Nothing to see here, either.

      Repeat after me: “La la la I’m not listening!”

      • mlpc 26.2.1
        5 June 2017 at 11:16 am

        Interesting choice of evidence there, OAB.

        Re your first point, I wasn’t making any claims about the environment, but in any case our rivers haven’t just become mucky since National got into power.

        Re your second point, the economic growth data shown ceases at 2010.

        Re your third point, you could have shown a later IMF report. The latest IMF World Economic Outlook shows that NZ’s growth has been higher than the advanced economies’ average every year since 2011 and is projected to stay that way until the end of the forecasting horizon in 2022.

        • greywarshark 26.2.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 11:21 am

          mlpc
          Your telescope needs more magnification, better, try high-powered binoculars.

        • One Anonymous Bloke 26.2.1.2
          5 June 2017 at 11:23 am

          No wonder you didn’t make any claims about the rivers: it would have spoiled the story you were telling.

          “Interesting choice” of items from the third link, which dates to late last year.

          1. New Zealand’s income level per capita remains lower than the average of OECD countries…
          2. This reflects low labor productivity (LP) levels, linked
          to both low levels of total factor productivity (TFP) and of
          capital deepening…
          3. Growth of LP (measured as output per worker), has
          been relatively low despite the income level gap…
          4. Moreover, LP growth has slowed since the GFC…
          5. The slowdown in capital deepening occurred
          even as labor input growth declined…
          6. Favorable terms of trade have supported
          incomes, but commodity prices have recently weakened
          considerably…

          And so on.

          All this aside, your cheerleading is hollow next to the growth in homeless families.

    • Kevin 26.3
      5 June 2017 at 11:55 am

      How was he elected three times?

      Well this tripe from an earlier comment:

      “Thanks for not drawing your huge PM salary, an example the leader of the opposition has surely followed. (HA HA! As if…)”

      Pretty much answers your question.

  27. Karen 27
    5 June 2017 at 10:27 am

    It isn’t even an ordinary knighthood that some other former PMs have received – it is the special exemplary knighthood that was given to Ed Hillary.

    Hillary deserved to be honoured. Giving the same award to Key is disgusting.

    Thanks for the list, Mickey. Let’s never forget Key’s true legacy.

    Francis McRae Retweeted
    Francis McRae‏ @FrankMcRae 18h18 hours ago
    “Knighted for services to talking about his balls on FM radio while the country was pulled into the abyss of a debilitating housing crisis”

  28. exkiwiforces 28
    5 June 2017 at 10:33 am

    Jeez, aren’t we a wee bit early or late for April fools day?

    I don’t know weather to laugh or cry atm, as I can’t have stiff drink atm because I’m attending a PTSD clinic as it’s a dry campus

  29. Bill 29
    5 June 2017 at 10:45 am

    For anyone who doesn’t think that John Key deserves a knighthood, I give you Terry Jones’s take on medieval knights.

    Knights and capitalists – (toxic) peas of a (poisonous) pod.

    • Draco T Bastard 29.1
      5 June 2017 at 6:28 pm

      Sounds like a good description of Key then – made lots of money from those weaker than himself causing death and destruction. He just used money and not a sword.

    • Rae 29.2
      6 June 2017 at 4:32 pm

      I see Terry Jones has been diagnosed with a form of dementia (I know, I know you could argue that he always has been a bit demented along with the rest of the Pythons) so that’s a bit sad.

  30. NZJester 30
    5 June 2017 at 10:49 am

    I will call him by the full title of “Sir Loots A Lot”

  31. Pete 31
    5 June 2017 at 10:49 am

    So is it Sir John Key KGCSB ? Or is that a lie?

    • North 31.1
      5 June 2017 at 11:52 am

      Sorry Pete…….neither question capable of being answered. No discernible contradistinction. Both feed the same picture.

      There must be a grammatical name for that pretty little device. Calling In Vino ……Calling In Vino…….

  32. North 32
    5 June 2017 at 11:14 am

    Gut reaction to this gala award for unctious fibbing blind……..”Who gives a fuck It makes him look even more ridiculous……..bullshit bauble hangin’ round his neck !”

    Must say tho’…….great shredding of remaining credibility of today’s honours system…….as reinvented by…….oh hang on……

    My God ? The finest example of capital gain……!

  33. UncookedSelachimorpha 33
    5 June 2017 at 11:15 am

    Sir John Key
    Sir Peter Talley
    Dame Jenny Shipley
    Sir Bob Jones
    Sir Roger Douglas

    A who’s-who of scoundrels, self-serving scumbags and abusers of the poor. The title is not worth a cracker.

    • Andre 33.1
      5 June 2017 at 12:28 pm

      “The title is not worth a cracker.”

      Oh I dunno. It seems to serve well as a great big flashing warning sign: Here be someone to keep your distance from.

      It’s just a shame that there’s still a few thoroughly worthy people now getting tarred by it.

  34. Tanz 34
    5 June 2017 at 11:47 am

    Totally sickening. People should not get knighted just for simply doing very well-paid jobs.
    Yes, he reinstated titular honours for this day, he always was a ‘look at me’, ‘ain’t I grand’ type. So full of himself, and yet he has left NZ in messy tatters. This has not made my day! I would much rather Clark got the honour over Key, if one had to choose. All the same, being PM is simply a very well paid privilege and job, and unless there were exceptional circumstances such as dealing with a war etc, the honour a knighthood is not appropriate. ‘Sir John’. Choke!

    • Kevin 34.1
      5 June 2017 at 6:24 pm

      The problem today is that being a Member of Parliament is no longer seen as public service, but as a legitimate occupation by those who seek it. They just have a slightly different job interview. As a result, they see things like knighthoods as legitimate rewards for their years of ‘service’.

      The sooner this archaic snobbery is consigned to the dustbin of history the better.

  35. Peter Bradley 35
    5 June 2017 at 12:04 pm

    In a democracy the electorate has to take some responsibility. Middle class NZ adored this shining example of aspirational success. “He must be a good person/leader because of his financial acumen.” John Key is just a single person – he put himself forward and NZ elected him repeatedly and the whining “blame it all on one individual” diatribes that emanate from the liberal/left are over the top and hysterical. What’s more they miss the bigger picture and distract us from thinking about solutions. By pinning all the blame onto the John key bogeyman we also absolve ourselves of taking responsibility for repeated electoral failure.
    Perhaps a beacon of hope and an example to all of us on the left is Jeremy Corbyn in the UK – he doesn’t do personal attacks and instead focuses on well thought out and costed policy and progressive taxation (remember that NZ Labour Party).
    He has returned socialism and ‘wealth redistribution’ to the heart of the UK Labour Party manifesto and to this date has created the biggest political change in western politics since the 50’s.
    So let John Key go, let him get on with his ongoing career trajectory in peace and focus energy on why the NZ electorate has chosen to elect a National government since 2008 and rejected the “John Key is a terrible person but we don’t have any very different policies NZ Labour Party. ” Reading the UK Labour Party manifesto would be a good start.

    • garibaldi 35.1
      5 June 2017 at 12:40 pm

      “Shining example of aspirational success”. Give me a bucket! Aspirational…. does that mean setting a goal for 50 years time and then carrying on as before, or doing even more damage than before? The guy is as disingenuous as they come.

  36. Tanz 36
    5 June 2017 at 12:09 pm

    Jeremy Corban? Yikes, I hope the people are wise enough to see through him.
    Does not believe in free speech, for one, shut down a guy who was holding up a sign simply advocating the right for all to free speech!

    • One Anonymous Bloke 36.1
      5 June 2017 at 3:16 pm

      *Corbyn.

      [citation needed]

      You made an assertion of fact. Now back it up or withdraw and apologise. Put up or shut up. After all, you were the one dribbling that none of the major parties are talking about immigration or overseas speculation the other day, and I had to rub your face in the facts.

      No “I heard it somewhere and I’ll get back to you”, not “sorry can’t find a link but it happened, I seen it!” or any of your other pathetic gobshite. Link or admit you’re inventing bullshit again.

      • Tanz 36.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 6:07 pm

        I saw it on a youtube clip, it was for real, a lynch mob was after this poor guy, made him leave (on a public London St), basically all but punched his lights out, just cause he was crusading for free speech. Corbyn was there, yes I knew I spelt it wrong, I ran out of time to edit.
        I will find it and link it, but Paul Joseph Watson, Info Wars, was there somewhere, for real.
        Yes, I suppose he is hated here too.

        • Tanz 36.1.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 6:30 pm

          as above, here it is. Corbyn is there. Who are the baddies? I felt sorry for the guy with the sign, talk about
          totally intimidated and actually forced to leave.
          Tolerance, not.

          • One Anonymous Bloke 36.1.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 7:26 pm

            😆 that’s not Corbyn, dupe. I suggest you have a close look at him at 3:05 in the video. And seriously, Infowars?! No wonder you come across as utterly ignorant. Wasn’t the Twiglet Zone music enough of a clue? Too funny.

            Everything else you believe is total bullshit too. Don’t forget now.

  37. adam 37
    5 June 2017 at 12:16 pm

    Why are people getting upset? This is the system you support, this is what it does. It has been this way for a while, so for people to go off against Key, is well a bit much.

    Either change the system, or put up. No other choice really. Because Key is no worse than many others who have got a knighthood.

    • marty mars 37.1
      5 June 2017 at 3:53 pm

      What are you doing to CHANGE the system.

      • adam 37.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 6:29 pm

        You mean apart from being a keyboard warrior 😉

        I work with some groups, I grow things, and I try to make people realise they don’t need the system we have, to have full and worthwhile lives.

        You, if we are asking the question?

        • marty mars 37.1.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 6:48 pm

          I feel a hypocrite sometimes because I want the system to change and I also live and participate within the system. I suppose I minimise that interaction but it is still there – for me saying change the system whilst being in the system is like trying to tie shoelaces while jumping in the air.

          • One Anonymous Bloke 37.1.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 7:31 pm

            It’s the only way any system has ever changed: you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

  38. Tanz 38
    5 June 2017 at 12:19 pm

    I for one, do not support our system, at all. MMP is a rort, was always a rort, created for pollies to game the system, which they do.

    • Thinkerr 38.1
      5 June 2017 at 1:06 pm

      MMP stops NZ becoming like the US, where vested interests can lobby both major parties and get what they want regardless of the election outcome.

      Check out the film “Someone Elses Country” and “In a Land of Plenty” – I think they are on youtube – if you weren’t of working age between 1984 & 1996.

      • Molly 38.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 3:38 pm

        Both on NZonScreen, if Tanz was at all interested in educating himself/herself.

      • Tanz 38.1.2
        5 June 2017 at 6:16 pm

        It also allows candidates who have been rejected by the voters get back in via the list. This has to be the biggest electoral rort of all time. The voters say no, and the candidate gets a golden ticket into Parliament anyway. Hardly democratic, and thumbing noses at the voting public.

        • One Anonymous Bloke 38.1.2.1
          5 June 2017 at 7:32 pm

          Hey shitheel, when I party vote Green I’m voting for everyone on their list. Fuck you for trying to annul my vote.

        • ropata 38.1.2.2
          5 June 2017 at 10:15 pm

          Were you even alive when MMP was voted in by overwhelming majorities? Kiwis were sick of FPP and successive governments acting like dictators. MMP brings in some balance. It also helped stopped the Rogernomics/Ruthanasia madness of selling up our pubic assets in the name of some fucked up ideology.

        • Rae 38.1.2.3
          6 June 2017 at 4:39 pm

          No, that is one of the best things about MMP, bearing in mind that only a few voters get to vote for candidates in each electorate. You have electorates that are hard out blue, you have electorates that are hard out red. In those situations neither party would put up a good candidate in a seat that was a stronghold for their opposition. Now, with MMP they can put up a good candidate and give the sitting member a run for their money, and all REAL choice for the voters, because that good candidate could have a high ranking on the list, so they then were not lost, people such as Jacinda Adern and Carmel Sepuloni spring to mind but there are more, both losing candidates but fared strongly, without MMP it is certain that Labour would never have stood a strong candidate against Paula Bennett.
          Go back and think about that a wee bit and I am sure you will agree that voters should be able to have proper choice when it comes to voting

      • MikeS 38.1.3
        5 June 2017 at 7:30 pm

        MMP doesn’t stop political lobbying, legislation does.

        I prefer MMP to FPP but if you think about it there’s not much difference.

  39. mpledger 39
    5 June 2017 at 12:39 pm

    Yea, well, just remembering Julie Christie’s “services to governance and the television industry”

    “The future of Campbell Live has been in doubt since the arrival of Julie Christie and Mark Weldon at MediaWorks in the middle of last year, as it came out of receivership.”
    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/business/news/article.cfm?c_id=3&objectid=11430252

  40. rhinocrates 40
    5 June 2017 at 1:44 pm

    On the subject of titles, Oscar Wilde called Burke’s Peerage the greatest work of fiction the English have ever produced. That was on hereditary titles of course, but the same is true for the shiny gold stars handed out now.

  41. Lance 41
    5 June 2017 at 2:17 pm

    Anybody would think you lefties didn’t like John?
    Of the horror, oh the humanity.
    John will be very cut up

    • greywarshark 41.1
      5 June 2017 at 6:09 pm

      Lance
      With a name like Lance you should be careful with talk about being cut up.

    • North 41.2
      6 June 2017 at 12:45 am

      Gongs are fodder to Lance. Probably has every NZ Womans’ Weekly ‘royal’ front page pressed and buried in his/her wardrobe.

  42. Tony Veitch (not the partner-bashing 3rd rate broadcaster 42
    5 June 2017 at 2:36 pm

    This abomination is the best argument for NZ becoming a republic I have ever heard!

    • greywarshark 42.1
      5 June 2017 at 3:06 pm

      Don’t be simplistic TV. If we were a republic there would be constant competition to build the leadership status higher than what had gone before, and then compete with other republics.

      We’d start off with useful controls against winding it all up and making it a circus, and then they would disappear on some basis and what a celebrity circuit we’d have. The face glowing, the glistening teeth, the glossy frocks or the fashion style, the outrageousness would rise.

      And I’ll blame you Tony, and all the other wishful thinkers/dreamers with snake oil remedies for ailments that are in our genes. And I don’t want to hear of GE, or actually building a better leader using our very own AI techniques, to make NZ great again.

      • Tony Veitch (not the partner-bashing 3rd rate broadcaster 42.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 6:00 pm

        Lol, greywarshark. And I’ll not disagree with you, humans are a fucked up species – one only has to pause for a moment to think, dreadful thought, of Donald J to have that confirmed.

        And any republic might just end up looking like America, heaven help us. But, at least, without a dishonour system we wouldn’t have to suffer the indignity of Slur John Key, Christie and Talley forced upon us!

        • greywarshark 42.1.1.1
          5 June 2017 at 6:04 pm

          Cassandra me! There is the possibility that we might get something worse.

          • Tony Veitch (not the partner-bashing 3rd rate broadcaster 42.1.1.1.1
            5 June 2017 at 6:54 pm

            Agreed – every possibility! In fact, every probability!

    • Halfcrown 42.2
      5 June 2017 at 6:11 pm

      “This abomination is the best argument for NZ becoming a republic I have ever heard!”

      +100%

  43. mary_a 43
    5 June 2017 at 2:50 pm

    May I add another five to the list please.

    1. Key supporting the dribbling double dipping dickwit from Dipton, when he tried to claim an accommodation allowance from taxpayers on his own property!

    2. Lying about his friendship with previous GCSB director Ian Fletcher.

    3. Ridiculing prison rape in a radio/video broadcast!

    4. Lying about NZ becoming a tax haven for money laundering purposes.

    5. Interfering with public broadcasting media, by having Campbell Live taken off air, because host John Campbell dared to speak the truth, while championing the underdog, something which went against Key and Natz philosophy.

    If any of these have already been mentioned, I apologise.

    And now to learn that Julie Christie has been honoured as a Dame, just adds insult to injury! She was instrumental with Key’s friend Mark Weldon in having John Campbell removed from TV3! Chrisiie obviously being rewarded for playing her part well here.

    Farcical!

    • rod 43.1
      5 June 2017 at 4:22 pm

      Well done Mary. Absolutely brilliant, take a bow.

    • srylands 43.2
      5 June 2017 at 4:41 pm

      You are being hysterical. All those things are either lies of out of context. e.g. Where is your – you know – “evidence” – that John Key conspired to force a private broadcaster to shut down Campbell Live?

      And BTW I wish he had stayed at TV3. Because he took a previously fine show in Checkpoint and ruined it. Further his salary is now being financed by the taxpayer.

      • Halfcrown 43.2.1
        5 June 2017 at 5:35 pm

        “Further his salary is now being financed by the taxpayer.”

        Like Hoskins

        How has Campbell ruined Checkpoint? is it because he is telling a few home truths which upsets your cosy fuck you jack I’m alright world.

      • Draco T Bastard 43.2.2
        6 June 2017 at 5:37 pm

        All those things are either lies of out of context

        No, simply the truth (except the the last one – still, there was that article about Key and his commiserating with business that wages were too high and other fiascos with journalists indicating that he had the form for pressuring the media) highlighting the fact that RWNJs are usually corrupt.

        Further his [Campbell] salary is now being financed by the taxpayer.

        Last time I looked, TV3 gets quite a bit of funding through NZonAir

    • Zid 43.3
      8 June 2017 at 1:31 pm

      So in your eyes Key didn’t do one good thing?

  44. Robert Guyton 44
    5 June 2017 at 3:11 pm

    If you believe the award is hollow and that the man is hollow, you’d probably think it’s a good match.

  45. Ad 45
    5 June 2017 at 3:20 pm

    Homeless sleeping rough 2008 v 2013: Far better under Labour than National:

    http://www.kiwiblog.co.nz/2016/08/homelessness_in_nz.html

    Unemployed in New Zealand: 3% under Labour, 5-6% under National:

    https://tradingeconomics.com/new-zealand/unemployment-rate

    Inequality in New Zealand: down under Labour until 2007, rocketing disparity under National:

    http://www.top.org.nz/key_indicators_of_new_zealand_s_inequality_eruption

    John Key was New Zealand’s most popular politician since Michael Joseph Savage, but made 90% of us worse off.

    • Ed 45.1
      5 June 2017 at 3:41 pm

      John Key.
      For the few.
      Not the many.

    • weka 45.2
      5 June 2017 at 5:53 pm

      “John Key was New Zealand’s most popular politician since Michael Joseph Savage,”

      Apart from preferred PM polls, is there research to support that? If you don’t follow politics and someone rings you up and asks you who you prefer, as you going to pick the dude with the funny kiwi hat on at the bbq that you see on TV a lot or the guy you’ve never heard of? I’m not suggesting that that’s everyone or even most, but just that I suspect the whole thing is over egged and meme-ified.

      • ropata 45.2.1
        5 June 2017 at 10:30 pm

        It was a rigged poll as well. A better one is “do you approve or disapprove of the PM” and his numbers were never that great. FJK’s approval numbers were tanking just before he bailed out

  46. Whispering Kate 46
    5 June 2017 at 4:08 pm

    The best thing this site should have done is absolutely not acknowledge that the event happened. Suffocate it of oxygen. Why would anybody on this site even want to discuss this knighthood. beats me. It was obvious it was going to happen, it should be treated as a non news event.

    • David C 46.1
      5 June 2017 at 5:01 pm

      But this site is all about the envy, a post was inevitable.

      • greywarshark 46.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 5:58 pm

        David C
        This site would have disappointed a lot of tail-waggers like you if it hadn’t given you your chance to run after the ball we threw you.

    • Blade 46.2
      5 June 2017 at 7:01 pm

      Agreed. But that head in the sand attitude is the same thing Labour is doing with voters ie if their concerns don’t match our political philosophy ( eg charter schools) we aint interested. That’s a great attitude for the ego and self delusion, but not so great for gaining the treasury benches.

  47. Morag 47
    5 June 2017 at 4:10 pm

    Please tel me this isn’t true.

  48. simonm 48
    5 June 2017 at 4:24 pm

    And thoroughly deserved it is too – for services to Beijing.

  49. srylands 49
    5 June 2017 at 4:38 pm

    I listened to Sir John being interviewed on RNZ this morning. He made the point that hindsight would always suggest that some things could have been done differenty, but overall his governments had foussed on the right things. Indeed some responses were remarkable, notably the ability to achieve fiscal consolidation without resorting to any austerity that would have affected the poor in ways that were simply unacceptable to either Sir John, or Hon English.

    The only thing he got badly wrong was housing. Sadly the only Party that offers solutions on that is TOP, which is why I would encourage you all to Party Vote 1 TOP at the coming election. Good luck Geoff Simmons!

    • Ed 49.1
      5 June 2017 at 4:45 pm

      That’s right – he dealt with inequality and child poverty superbly.

    • North 49.2
      6 June 2017 at 1:24 am

      Surely everyone knows about the delicious thing that ‘happened’ with SSLands at the very moment he mouthed “Sir John….” ? Which probably explains the afterplay in the rest of the paragraph.

      “The only thing he got badly wrong was housing.” Well Well Well ! SSLands !

      Ever heard of ‘Maslow’s Needs Heirarchy’, fool ? The physical survival need is there as the very foundation of every other need/aspiration. I assume you agree that housing is a seminal part of physical survival SSLands. If not (and that would not surprise me) piss off down to the Antarctic. Without a polar tent. See how that goes.

      Well done you SSLands……..acknowledging “badly wrong” in something so seminal to Kiwi lives. Housing.

  50. Ffloyd 50
    5 June 2017 at 4:54 pm

    Let the little man have it. It’s all a load of bollocks anyway. Anyway, most male school teachers get called Sir every day as a matter of course. Except they’ve probably want the title of respect. ….Sir John key. Be he ever so humble. Lol.

  51. David C 51
    5 June 2017 at 5:07 pm

    Sirs Johns greatest achievments (IMHO anyway) are;
    1. Carrying on Helens legacy of giving money away to those that havent earned it.
    2. Carrying on Helens legacy of destroying the Labour Party.
    3. Being smart enough to own the center.

    • greywarshark 51.1
      5 June 2017 at 6:01 pm

      Pity you got left out of the centre (not USA spelling please) in the cold on the periphery. Perhaps someone will notice you one day.

      • greywarshark 51.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 6:43 pm

        I am straying out of bounds a bit – that was an ad hominem comment against David C wasn’t it. But he was going high for hyperbole and needed batting down with a badminton racket or something.

        I think what I should have said is give me examples and links for Nos. 1 and 2.
        I didn’t because I thought he wouldn’t have any, but I now give you your chance David C to come out with your slingshot and bring down the mighty Goliath obelisk that is TS.

  52. fender 52
    5 June 2017 at 5:09 pm

    Well done Key, one your main reasons for entering politics in the first place has been delivered to you on a plate.

  53. Denis L 53
    5 June 2017 at 5:54 pm

    A fair description of John Key’s legacy – 8 years of neglect. A disgraceful outcome for NZ worst PM.

    • Blade 53.1
      5 June 2017 at 6:52 pm

      So , if your perceptions are correct- Key, the worst PM in NZ history, should leave a legacy that’ll have National kicked out at the upcoming election.

      Either your rabid political bias is skewered, or reality is about to make you bitter for another three years. The polls say bet on both.

  54. Tamati Tautuhi 54
    5 June 2017 at 6:29 pm

    Sir JK will be over the moon with his new gong !!!

    After all he has been the most popular PM ever in the history of the country, so the media kept telling us ?

  55. David Mac 55
    5 June 2017 at 6:44 pm

    Congratulations John, here’s your coats, there’s the door, see you and Bill around.

  56. David Mac 56
    5 June 2017 at 6:49 pm

    You know you’re dishing out too many of these when a country our size has 2 Sir JKs.

  57. David Mac 57
    5 June 2017 at 7:01 pm

    Rather than roasting the paper tiger, if winning an election is the job at hand, I think a strategy that plays to those that could vote left makes more sense.

    “Oh yeah one of the sharpest PM’s we’ve ever had. A master of the game. Like every successful Wall St trader, cunning enough to know when to get out. The money days are over, we’ve gone full circle and back to caring about each other again, cool eh.”

    • Ed 57.1
      5 June 2017 at 7:15 pm

      UK Labour are doing well because they are not fawning to the likes of Key.
      They are demanding.

      • David Mac 57.1.1
        5 June 2017 at 7:52 pm

        Yes, but he is yesterday’s man. He’s got a staff pass card at Air NZ. A faux target.

        The rock star has lost his voice and none of the Famous Flames can ever be James Brown.

        In the hive the Ministers have continued with John’s repertoire. God it just sounds so empty. They answer every question with how much of our money they’re fixing the problem with. Money and people are 2 quite different things.

        I’m not suggesting we turn the blowlamp down, play it on Bill and those empty talking heads.

  58. mosa 58
    5 June 2017 at 9:06 pm

    This knighthood has been bought by a sycophant and nominated by a governing group of people who claim to be New Zealanders but have no connection with the grater slavery of their fellow citizens and their lack of wealth ,status and self respect.

    It is not even a true New Zealand honour but one that is from our colonial past that seems to be fitting for someone who would have been quite at home in imperial Great Britain.

    I am a little less proud to be a kiwi.

  59. Michael who failed Civics 59
    6 June 2017 at 12:15 am

    He deserves it. Just like all the other rightwing fatcats who score these preposterous feudal gongs.

  60. Ed 60
    6 June 2017 at 9:51 am

    Key supported Empire.

    1. He increased the reach for multinational corporations ( although his pet project the TPPA has stalled)
    2. He allowed our citizens to be spied on by US spy organisations. The passing of spy laws gave powerful corporate and government agencies access all NZers data.
    3. He made NZ more supportive of the military aims of the US, sending troops to Iraq and Afghanistan.

    Key was a willing puppet for the establishment and his knighthood is due reward for his loyal service.
    People saying he didn’t deserve the award forget who hands out the prize.

  61. Treetop 61
    6 June 2017 at 10:01 am

    If not mentioned I would like to add not having an inquiry into the sexual abuse of children in state care.

    Not addressing the issue of adults who were sexually abused in childhood, have with ACC prior to the inception of ACC.

  62. Rozgonz 62
    6 June 2017 at 1:13 pm

    Oh dear, I’m just so glad I don’t lean left after reading this crap