ImperatorFish: Judith Collins explains
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8:14 am, April 18th, 2014 - 30 comments
Categories: Judith Collins, Satire -
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mperatorFish generously allows us to repost some of his posts. It was impossible to resist this satire.
I can’t believe I’m having to explain myself yet again. Didn’t I already provide a perfectly clear explanation?
These allegations are disgusting and outrageous. How could anyone for a moment think I did something wrong?
All I did was attend a dinner with bosses of a company having trouble with Chinese border officials, a dinner that a Chinese border official coincidentally attended. So what? So what if Oravida and its owner Stone Shi donate heavily to the National Party, and my husband is also involved with the company? What possible motive could I have to help Oravida? What possible conflict could arise in such a situation?
The presence of a Chinese border official at a dinner I was attending with the owner of a company having trouble with Chinese border officials, is entirely irrelevant. In my role as MP and government minister I attend a lot of meals, and I often find myself seated next to Chinese border officials. I see Chinese border officials almost everywhere I go, and it’s got to the stage where I hardly notice them anymore.
I’ll give you an example. Just last week I took my husband out for a quiet romantic dinner at a restaurant in my local electorate, and when we got to our table we found a Chinese border official already sitting there. He looked at the wine list and ate some of the bread we ordered as a starter, but didn’t say a word. I couldn’t even tell you what he looked like, because it didn’t seem important. It’s really no big deal.
We came home to find another Chinese border official sitting in the lounge, sifting through my pile of House and Garden magazines. He had helped himself to our tea but was otherwise minding his own business, so we left him there. I made up the spare bed for him, but he left of his own accord after we’d turned in for the night.
On my flight to Wellington on Monday morning I was seated next to a Chinese border official. I could tell what he did for a living because he had a badge on saying “Chinese border official,” which is lucky, otherwise I’d have assumed he was just another Chinese businessman in a suit. It even turned out that the pilot was a Chinese border official. These people are everywhere, so it would have been an enormous surprise if one of them hadn’t been at my dinner with Oravida.
Did I speak to the Chinese border official during my dinner with Oravida? Of course I didn’t! Why would I? What would I have to say to such an uninteresting and ubiquitous class of person?
Actually, come to think of it, I may have spoken to the gentleman. I remember now that at the very beginning of the dinner I stood over him and said “now listen here, you Chinese official type person, I have nothing to say to you. And I won’t be having any of your talk, so button your lip!” And then I gave him The Stare. I think you know The Stare. It’s what I’m about to give you very shortly if you don’t stop with all these questions.
And that was that. No, how could I possibly know why the Chinese border official was at the dinner? What possible reason could Oravida have for greasing up to such a person? Oh, Oravida was having problems with Chinese border officials, you say? I didn’t know that at the time, did I? Yes, I’m aware now that Oravida was lobbying ministers to intervene, but just because I happen to be a personal friend of Stone Shi, the owner of the company, that doesn’t mean he would have approached me for assistance in the matter. No, I just can’t imagine him ever doing that.
But let me be clear that if it does turn out that Stone Shi asked me to intervene on Oravida’s behalf, that doesn’t mean there was anything unusual or sinister in my having dinner with a Chinese border official. If Mr Shi did mention Oravida’s problems, then I’m sure I forgot about them immediately afterwards. I’m an extremely busy woman, and I can’t be expected to remember every single thing people tell me. Surely if John Banks can lose a helicopter ride, I can be allowed to forget this one little thing.
I’m confident that my presence at the dinner was in no way an attempt by Oravida to impress or intimidate the Chinese border official by wheeling out pliant New Zealand government ministers. I can’t imagine that sort of thing would ever happen in China. Surely that’s not how business is done there.
So enough of this rubbish and nonsense about Oravida. Why don’t you ask me questions about more important things? I have a wide range of other ministerial responsibilities, and there are lots of exciting things happening in my other portfolios.
What’s that? You want to talk about ACC privacy breaches? In that case, does anyone else have anything they’d like to ask me about Oravida?
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The Green Party is appalled with the Government’s new child poverty targets that are based on a new ‘persistent poverty’ measure that could be met even with an increase in child poverty. ...6 days ago
- Release: Four weeks annual leave under threat
The Government’s attack on workers continues with news it is scrapping work on the Holidays Act. ...6 days ago
- Govt’s emissions plan for measly 1% reduction
New independent analysis has revealed that the Government’s Emissions Reduction Plan (ERP) will reduce emissions by a measly 1 per cent by 2030, failing to set us up for the future and meeting upcoming targets. ...6 days ago
- Greens stand in solidarity with Whakaata Māori on sad day
The loss of 27 kaimahi at Whakaata Māori and the end of its daily news bulletin is a sad day for Māori media and another step backwards for Te Tiriti o Waitangi justice. ...6 days ago
- Sanctions regime to create more hardship for families
Yesterday the Government passed cruel legislation through first reading to establish a new beneficiary sanction regime that will ultimately mean more households cannot afford the basic essentials. ...6 days ago
- Govt gifts renters housing anxiety for Christmas
Today's passing of the Government's Residential Tenancies Amendment Bill–which allows landlords to end tenancies with no reason–ignores the voice of the people and leaves renters in limbo ahead of the festive season. ...6 days ago
- Release: National Party urged to support modern slavery legislation
Labour is urging the Prime Minister to walk the talk and support legislation combating modern slavery. ...1 week ago
- Release: Labour has lost confidence in the Speaker
The Speaker of the New Zealand Parliament made an unprecedented decision on the government amendment to the Fast Track Approvals Bill last night. ...1 week ago
- One year on, still no progress on new ferries
Today’s announcement from the Government on its plan for new ferries throws more uncertainty on the future of the country’s rail network. ...1 week ago
- Release: Nicola Willis’ smaller ferries will cost more
After wasting a year, Nicola Willis has delivered a worse deal for the Cook Strait ferries that will end up being more expensive and take longer to arrive. ...1 week ago
- Bill to sanction unlawful occupation of Palestine
Green Party co-leader Chlöe Swarbrick has today launched a Member’s Bill to sanction Israel for its unlawful presence in the Occupied Palestinian Territory, as the All Out For Gaza rally reaches Parliament. ...1 week ago
- Release: Labour fully supports greyhound racing ban
The Government has done the right thing in moving to ban greyhound racing. ...1 week ago
- Greyhound racing industry ban marks new era for animal welfare
After years of advocacy, the Green Party is very happy to hear the Government has listened to our collective voices and announced the closure of the greyhound racing industry, by 1 August 2026. ...1 week ago
- Rangatahi voices must be centred in Government’s Relationship and Sexuality Education refresh
In response to a new report from ERO, the Government has acknowledged the urgent need for consistency across the curriculum for Relationship and Sexuality Education (RSE) in schools. ...1 week ago
- Govt introduces archaic anti-worker legislation
The Green Party is appalled at the Government introducing legislation that will make it easier to penalise workers fighting for better pay and conditions. ...1 week ago
- Winston Peters – Kinleith Mill Speech
Thank you for the invitation to speak with you tonight on behalf of the political party I belong to - which is New Zealand First. As we have heard before this evening the Kinleith Mill is proposing to reduce operations by focusing on pulp and discontinuing “lossmaking paper production”. They say that they are currently consulting on the plan to permanently shut ...1 week ago - Swarbrick calls on Auckland Mayor to end delay of revival of St James Theatre
Auckland Central MP, Chlöe Swarbrick, has written to Mayor Wayne Brown requesting he stop the unnecessary delays on St James Theatre’s restoration. ...2 weeks ago
- He Ara Anamata: Greens launch Emissions Reduction Plan
Today, the Green Party of Aotearoa proudly unveils its new Emissions Reduction Plan–He Ara Anamata–a blueprint reimagining our collective future. ...2 weeks ago
- Fossil fuel lobbyist appointment to EECA board called out
The Green Party condemns the Government’s appointment of a fossil fuel lobbyist to the Energy Efficiency & Conservation Authority Board. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Boot camps must be shut down today
The Prime Minister has committed to shut down his government’s boot camps if there is evidence of harm to children – so he must do that today. ...2 weeks ago
- Greens echo OECD call for electricity market reform
The Green Party has welcomed the OECD urging the Government to re-examine separating ‘gentailers’ to make a fairer electricity market for New Zealanders. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Govt breaks Auckland housing promise
Housing Minister Chris Bishop has confirmed National has broken yet another election promise. ...2 weeks ago
- Government smokescreen to downgrade climate ambition
Today the ACT-National Coalition Agreement pet project’s findings on “no additional warming” were released. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Health NZ admits errors led to claimed deficit
Health New Zealand has exaggerated its deficit to justify job cuts. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: More cuts to research, science and innovation sector
The Government’s latest round of cuts to research and innovation targets the long-established and successful Marsden Fund. ...2 weeks ago
- Judicial appointment announced
Attorney-General Judith Collins today announced the appointment of Justice Christian Whata as a Judge of the Court of Appeal. Justice Whata’s appointment as a Judge of the Court of Appeal will take effect on 1 August 2025 and fill a vacancy created by the retirement of Hon Justice David Goddard on ...27 minutes ago - Strengthening Free Speech in Universities
Tertiary Education and Skills Minister Penny Simmonds and Associate Minister of Education David Seymour today announced legislation changes to strengthen freedom of speech obligations on universities. “Freedom of speech is fundamental to the concept of academic freedom and there is concern that universities seem to be taking a more risk-averse ...2 hours ago
- Launch of Emergency Cellular Priority Service
Police Minister, Mark Mitchell, and Internal Affairs Minister, Brooke van Velden, today launched a further Public Safety Network cellular service that alongside last year’s Cellular Roaming roll-out, puts globally-leading cellular communications capability into the hands of our emergency responders. The Public Safety Network’s new Cellular Priority service means Police, Wellington ...3 hours ago
- Minister reopens Mangamuka Gorge
State Highway 1 through the Mangamuka Gorge has officially reopened today, providing a critical link for Northlanders and offering much-needed relief ahead of the busy summer period, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.“The Mangamuka Gorge is a vital route for Northland, carrying around 1,300 vehicles per day and connecting the Far ...3 hours ago
- Funding confirmed for second Ashburton Bridge
The Government has welcomed decisions by the NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) and Ashburton District Council confirming funding to boost resilience in the Canterbury region, with construction on a second Ashburton Bridge expected to begin in 2026, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “Delivering a second Ashburton Bridge to improve resilience and ...4 hours ago
- Government boosts support for avian influenza response
The Government is backing the response into high pathogenic avian influenza (HPAI) in Otago, Biosecurity Minister Andrew Hoggard says. “Cabinet has approved new funding of $20 million to enable MPI to meet unbudgeted ongoing expenses associated with the H7N6 response including rigorous scientific testing of samples at the enhanced PC3 ...4 hours ago
- Levelling the playing field for media advertising
Legislation that will repeal all advertising restrictions for broadcasters on Sundays and public holidays has passed through first reading in Parliament today, Media Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “As a growing share of audiences get their news and entertainment from streaming services, these restrictions have become increasingly redundant. New Zealand on ...22 hours ago
- Inspector-General of Defence appointed
Today the House agreed to Brendan Horsley being appointed Inspector-General of Defence, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “Mr Horsley’s experience will be invaluable in overseeing the establishment of the new office and its support networks. “He is currently Inspector-General of Intelligence and Security, having held that role since June 2020. ...22 hours ago
- Fire and Emergency New Zealand final levy rates confirmed
Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden says the Government has agreed to the final regulations for the levy on insurance contracts that will fund Fire and Emergency New Zealand from July 2026. “Earlier this year the Government agreed to a 2.2 percent increase to the rate of levy. Fire ...23 hours ago
- More AML relief on the way for Kiwi businesses
The Government is delivering regulatory relief for New Zealand businesses through changes to the Anti-Money Laundering and Countering Financing of Terrorism Act. “The Anti-Money Laundering and Countering Financing of Terrorism Amendment Bill, which was introduced today, is the second Bill – the other being the Statutes Amendment Bill - that ...23 hours ago
- Hawke’s Bay Expressway moving at pace
Transport Minister Simeon Brown has welcomed further progress on the Hawke’s Bay Expressway Road of National Significance (RoNS), with the NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) Board approving funding for the detailed design of Stage 1, paving the way for main works construction to begin in late 2025.“The Government is moving at ...24 hours ago
- Government seeks partnerships to plant trees on Crown-owned-land
The Government today released a request for information (RFI) to seeking interest in partnerships to plant trees on Crown-owned land with low farming and conservation value (excluding National Parks) Forestry Minister Todd McClay announced. “Planting trees on Crown-owned land will drive economic growth by creating more forestry jobs in our regions, providing more wood ...24 hours ago
- Wide ranging legislation to make justice system more efficient
Court timeliness, access to justice, and improving the quality of existing regulation are the focus of a series of law changes introduced to Parliament today by Associate Minister of Justice Nicole McKee. The three Bills in the Regulatory Systems (Justice) Amendment Bill package each improve a different part of the ...24 hours ago
- Diverse skills in community trust appointments
A total of 41 appointments and reappointments have been made to the 12 community trusts around New Zealand that serve their regions, Associate Finance Minister Shane Jones says. “These trusts, and the communities they serve from the Far North to the deep south, will benefit from the rich experience, knowledge, ...1 day ago
- Torture redress for survivors of the Lake Alice Unit
The Government has confirmed how it will provide redress to survivors who were tortured at the Lake Alice Psychiatric Hospital Child and Adolescent Unit (the Lake Alice Unit). “The Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse in Care found that many of the 362 children who went through the Lake Alice Unit between 1972 and ...1 day ago
- A busy year in the House
It has been a busy, productive year in the House as the coalition Government works hard to get New Zealand back on track, Leader of the House Chris Bishop says. “This Government promised to rebuild the economy, restore law and order and reduce the cost of living. Our record this ...1 day ago
- Consultation opens on working with engineered stone
“Accelerated silicosis is an emerging occupational disease caused by unsafe work such as engineered stone benchtops. I am running a standalone consultation on engineered stone to understand what the industry is currently doing to manage the risks, and whether further regulatory intervention is needed,” says Workplace Relations and Safety Minister ...1 day ago
- Greater reporting on Treaty settlement commitments
Mehemea he pai mō te tangata, mahia – if it’s good for the people, get on with it. Enhanced reporting on the public sector’s delivery of Treaty settlement commitments will help improve outcomes for Māori and all New Zealanders, Māori Crown Relations Minister Tama Potaka says. Compiled together for the ...1 day ago
- New appointments to the Charities Registration Board
Mr Roger Holmes Miller and Ms Tarita Hutchinson have been appointed to the Charities Registration Board, Community and Voluntary Sector Minister Louise Upston says. “I would like to welcome the new members joining the Charities Registration Board. “The appointment of Ms Hutchinson and Mr Miller will strengthen the Board’s capacity ...1 day ago
- Building consent processing times improve
More building consent and code compliance applications are being processed within the statutory timeframe since the Government required councils to submit quarterly data, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “In the midst of a housing shortage we need to look at every step of the build process for efficiencies ...1 day ago
- Faster access to support through Innovation Fund
Mental Health Minister Matt Doocey is proud to announce the first three recipients of the Government’s $10 million Mental Health and Addiction Community Sector Innovation Fund which will enable more Kiwis faster access to mental health and addiction support. “This fund is part of the Government’s commitment to investing in ...1 day ago
- New Zealand to assist Vanuatu on earthquake response
New Zealand is providing Vanuatu assistance following yesterday's devastating earthquake, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. "Vanuatu is a member of our Pacific family and we are supporting it in this time of acute need," Mr Peters says. "Our thoughts are with the people of Vanuatu, and we will be ...1 day ago
- Government takes steps to reduce card fees for Kiwis
The Government welcomes the Commerce Commission’s plan to reduce card fees for Kiwis by an estimated $260 million a year, Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly says.“The Government is relentlessly focused on reducing the cost of living, so Kiwis can keep more of their hard-earned income and live a ...1 day ago
- Review recommends ECE regulation shakeup
Regulation Minister David Seymour has welcomed the Early Childhood Education (ECE) regulatory review report, the first major report from the Ministry for Regulation. The report makes 15 recommendations to modernise and simplify regulations across ECE so services can get on with what they do best – providing safe, high-quality care ...1 day ago
- Offshore Renewable Energy Bill passes first reading
The Government‘s Offshore Renewable Energy Bill to create a new regulatory regime that will enable firms to construct offshore wind generation has passed its first reading in Parliament, Energy Minister Simeon Brown says.“New Zealand currently does not have a regulatory regime for offshore renewable energy as the previous government failed ...2 days ago
- Local Government (Water Services) Bill passes first reading
Legislation to enable new water service delivery models that will drive critical investment in infrastructure has passed its first reading in Parliament, marking a significant step towards the delivery of Local Water Done Well, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown and Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly say.“Councils and voters ...2 days ago
- Gene Technology Bill passes first reading
New Zealand is one step closer to reaping the benefits of gene technology with the passing of the first reading of the Gene Technology Bill, Science, Innovation and Technology Minister Judith Collins says. "This legislation will end New Zealand's near 30-year ban on gene technology outside the lab and is ...2 days ago
- New Zealand ratifies AANZFTA Upgrade
New Zealand has ratified the Upgrade to the Agreement establishing the ASEAN-Australia-New Zealand Free Trade Area (AANZFTA), Minister for Trade Todd McClay announced today. “ASEAN which is comprised of Brunei Darussalam, Cambodia, Indonesia, Lao PDR, Malaysia, Myanmar, Philippines, Singapore, Thailand, and Vietnam, is New Zealand’s fourth largest trading partner in two-way trade – ...2 days ago
- PM’s Space Prizes highlight talent and innovation
The inaugural winners of the Prime Minister’s Space Prizes showcase the depth and breadth of talent in New Zealand’s dynamic space and advanced aviation sectors, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Space Minister Judith Collins say. “The Government established these prizes to recognise and encourage innovative expertise and rising talent in ...2 days ago
- One-stop shop fast-track bill passes third reading
The coalition Government’s new one-stop shop fast-track consenting regime for regionally and nationally significant projects will help rebuild the New Zealand economy, say RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Minister for Regional Development Shane Jones. The Fast-track Approvals Bill passed its third reading in Parliament today. Applications for projects to ...2 days ago
- Antarctica New Zealand Board appointment
Foreign Minister Winston Peters has appointed Craig Ellison to the Board of Antarctica New Zealand. The appointment is effective from 18 December 2024 for a three-year term and brings the Board to its full capacity of seven members. “Mr Ellison joins the Board with a background in Antarctic ...2 days ago
- New diplomatic appointments
Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters has announced four new diplomatic appointments. “Our diplomats play an important role in ensuring New Zealand’s interests are maintained and enhanced across the world,” Mr Peters says. “It is a pleasure to announce the appointment of these senior diplomats from the Ministry of Foreign ...2 days ago
- Financial measure and capital allowance updated
The Government is adopting a new financial indicator and a new approach to capital allowances, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. These changes follow reviews, announced at the Budget, of the operating balance before gains and losses (OBEGAL) and the multi-year capital allowance (MYCA). “Since 2008, governments have used OBEGAL to ...2 days ago
- Lifting productivity key
Lifting the productive capacity of the economy is the key to realising New Zealand’s potential, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. “The Half Year Economic and Fiscal Update released today shows the Crown’s financial position has deteriorated over the past six years, but the economy has reached a turning point. “Inflation ...2 days ago
- Consultation on Arms Act rewrite to begin
Associate Justice Minister Nicole McKee has welcomed Cabinet’s decision to undertake public consultation on the rewrite of the Arms Act 1983. “Phase four of my firearms reforms is the rewrite of the Act and, as promised, we will be consulting with the New Zealand public. The consultation period will open ...2 days ago
- Government confirms reduction to Forestry ETS annual charge
The Government has today confirmed a 50 per cent reduction to the annual charge for forest owners participating in the forestry Emissions Trading Scheme (ETS), Forestry Minister Todd McClay announced. “This decision delivers on the Government’s promise to rebuild confidence in the forestry sector and support its role in achieving ...2 days ago
- First quarterly Oranga Tamariki performance data released
Children’s Minister Karen Chhour has welcomed the release of the first quarter of Oranga Tamariki performance data. “Since becoming Minister for Children, I have been clear that Oranga Tamariki must be relentlessly focused on the safety of children and young people in its care. “This is why I introduced key performance ...2 days ago
- Public to have their say on disability funding
The wider disability community will have their say early next year on how the Government should deliver disability support services that are fair, consistent, transparent, and sustainable, Disability Issues Minister Louise Upston says. “The Government is committed to better public services and building a disability support system that delivers better ...2 days ago
- Securing the skills and experience NZ needs
The Government is supporting businesses to secure the skills and experience New Zealand needs by continuing to refine the Accredited Employer Work Visa (AEWV). “A responsive immigration system is fundamental to rebuilding the economy,” Immigration Minister Erica Stanford says. “Earlier in the year, we made initial changes to the AEWV ...2 days ago
- Minimum wage set for 2025
The adult minimum wage rate will increase by 1.5 percent to $23.50 an hour from 1 April 2025, Workplace Relations and Safety Minister Brooke van Velden announced today. This minimum wage increase meets the NZ First-National coalition commitment to moderate increases to the minimum wage every year. Cabinet’s decision reflects ...2 days ago
- A world on fire: the World Bulletin year in review
Looking back at the events that made headlines around the globe in 2024. This is an excerpt from The World Bulletin, our weekly global current affairs newsletter exclusively for Spinoff Members. Sign up here. If you’re anything like me, you’ll be hard pressed to think of a grimmer year than ...16 minutes ago - Government to change free speech rules for universities
The coalition's proposal will also prohibit unis from adopting positions on issues that don't relate to their "core functions". ...33 minutes ago - From garlic to parsley, new research reveals the herbs and spices Australians love most
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Evangeline Mantzioris, Program Director of Nutrition and Food Sciences, Accredited Practising Dietitian, University of South Australia Herbs and spices have been used in cooking for centuries. They add flavour, aroma and colour to foods and have long been used for health ...58 minutes ago - Keith Rankin Essay – Judaism, Antisemitism, and Israel
Analysis by Keith Rankin. To understand antisemitism, we need a meaning for ‘semitism’, and another -ism to contextualise semitism. Keith Rankin, trained as an economic historian, is a retired lecturer in Economics and Statistics. He lives in Auckland, New Zealand. Literally, semitism means the promotion of the Semitic people, whoever ...2 hours ago
- Former Defence Minister Peeni Henare calls Vanuatu flight woes ’embarrassing
A Hercules plane carrying urban rescue staff to Vanuatu was stranded in New Caledonia after an engine fault. ...2 hours ago
- The Spinoff’s favourite movies of 2024
2 hours ago
- NZ’s dairy industry faces an uncertain future – its fate now lies in its ability to adapt
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Milena Bojovic, PhD Candidate, Macquarie University William West/AFP via Getty Images New Zealand’s dairy sector faces an uncertain future due to several challenges, including water pollution, high emissions, animal welfare concerns and market volatility. All of these issues are building ...3 hours ago
- Call for entries: Rod Oram Memorial Essay Prize
Calling all young writers!To honour our great friend and esteemed colleague, Rod Oram, we are calling for essays from young people campaigning for a more equitable, sustainable and compassionate world.Rod Oram was a revered journalist and environmentalist, known for his rigorously researched and passionate commentaries on business, government and wider ...3 hours ago - Banger alert: the song of the summer is ‘Harty Māori Stylez’
Espresso this, Not Like Us that. There will be only one true song of Aotearoa’s summer: Harty Māori Stylez by Te Kura Reo Rua o Waikirikiri. This summer, as you cruise coast to coast, you’re going to need an anthem to soundtrack your movements. A song that encapsulates the feeling ...4 hours ago
- GMO Bill Creates More Societal Division
Organics Aotearoa New Zealand (OANZ) last week completed another two days with Ministers, political leaders, Ministries and primary sector leaders sharing science knowledge, societal concerns, economic impacts and trade findings. ...5 hours ago - Lake Alice redress payments won’t have sway on what other survivors receive
Lead minister of the government's response to abuse in care Erica Stanford said Cabinet looked at this case very separately. ...5 hours ago
- Help Me Hera: I hate spending Christmas with my in-laws
I grew up in a family where Christmas was all about tradition and hospitality. My husband’s family takes a different approach. How do I get over my resentment and have a nice day? Want Hera’s help? Email your problem to helpme@thespinoff.co.nz Dear Hera The Christmas I had growing up was always quite lovely, ...5 hours ago
- AI will continue to grow in 2025. But it will face major challenges along the way
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Daswin de Silva, Professor of AI and Analytics, Deputy Director of the Centre for Data Analytics and Cognition, La Trobe University cybermagician/Shutterstock In 2024, artificial intelligence (AI) continued taking large and surprising steps forward. People started conversing with AI “resurrections” ...6 hours ago
- Fifty years ago, Cyclone Tracy devastated Darwin. The lessons from it have still not been learnt
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Steven Farram, Associate Professor in North Australian and Regional Studies (History), Charles Darwin University It is hard to comprehend the force with which Cyclone Tracy struck Darwin early on Christmas Day, 1974. It was so ferocious that it killed 66 people, partly ...6 hours ago
- Australia has an ongoing GP shortage. Why can’t we just train more GPs?
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Christopher Harrison, Senior Lecturer, Sydney School of Public Health, University of Sydney NotarYES/Shutterstock If you have Australia is critically short of GPs – and the shortfall is growing, predicted to be 8,600 GPs by 2048. So why can’t we just train ...6 hours ago
- Could NZ’s two kākā subspecies actually be remnants of a more diverse species? Here’s why we n...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michael Knapp, Associate Professor in Biological Anthropology, University of Otago Wolfgang Kaehler/LightRocket via Getty Images As many Wellingtonians will know, kākā can be trouble. New Zealand’s pesky forest parrots have expanded throughout New Zealand’s capital city since they were reintroduced 22 ...6 hours ago
- More than 1,300 Hajj pilgrims died this year when humidity and heat pushed past survivable limits. I...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Emma Ramsay, Research Affiliate in Climate Adaptation, Monash University Every year, hundreds of thousands of Muslims undertake the Hajj –the sacred pilgrimage to Mecca. In 2024, the pilgrimage took place in mid-June, the start of the Saudi summer. But this year, ...6 hours ago
- How a Cold War satellite and Robert Menzies changed the way Australian schools are funded
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Jennifer Clark, Adjunct Professor of History, University of Adelaide Prime Minister Robert Menzies during the 1963 federal election campaign. Image courtesy of the National Archives of Australia. NAA: A1200, L46014 As students and teachers prepare to go on holidays, there’s a ...6 hours ago
- Where does Santa live? It’s a trickier question to answer than you may think
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Marcus Harmes, Professor in Pathways Education, University of Southern Queensland Santa Claus Village in Rovaniemi, Lapland, Finland. Roman Babakin/Shutterstock Sending a letter to Santa can be difficult as no one can agree on where exactly Santa lives. Several countries are competing to ...6 hours ago
- Winston Peters spends much of year’s last speech criticising Te Pāti Māori, Waititi breaks i...
Watch: "Have a good Christmas, 'cos you'll need it sunshine," the NZ First leader said in a rowdy final debate in the house. ...6 hours ago
- The year in five news events
For the penultimate Bulletin of 2024, editor Stewart Sowman-Lund flicks back through some of the biggest headlines of the year. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign up here. ...7 hours ago
- Swimming loses public funding but elite duo protected
High Performance Sport New Zealand will invest $162.8m into 36 national sporting organisations and athletes over the next four years, up from $131m in the four years leading up to this year’s Paris Olympics.From March next year, nearly $41 million per annum will go directly to national sports organisations for ...7 hours ago
- Former National MP joins push for University of Waikato’s third medical school.
A former National MP and incumbent Hamilton City Councillor has been hired by the University of Waikato to advocate for its proposed third medical school. ...8 hours ago
- Transmission Gully: New plan to tackle long-standing fight
A new plan has been hatched to try to resolve a years-long fight to protect native fish at Transmission Gully. ...8 hours ago
- Opposition parties move towards ‘formalising’ collaboration
Te Pāti Māori had to "get past ourselves" and is figuring out working with Labour. Labour says collaboration is still "casual", but the Greens say they'll be meeting regularly. ...9 hours ago
- The Spinoff’s biggest stories of 2024
From malls to gods, woke foods to putrid stenches, the year’s greatest hits had a bit of everything. A tip: to create a perfect summer reading list (albeit with a crowded browser), click the headline of every story you missed to open it in a fresh tab. The 10 most ...9 hours ago
- Ten stories that defined New Zealand’s media in 2024
It was a torrid year for almost every aspect of New Zealand’s media. Duncan Greive breaks down the key storylines – and the one vast, existential threat lurking underneath. Duncan Greive and Glen Kyne discuss many of these stories on The Fold’s year in review. 1. The end of ...9 hours ago
- Daily crossword, Thursday 19 December
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- Huzzah! The 2024 ReadingRoom awards
And so 2024 in New Zealand literature will be remembered for not all that much, hardly anything to do with actual literature, more to do with politics and money, as in it will be remembered for 1) the shameful hunting of poet Tusiata Avia for having the gall to express ...9 hours ago
- Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 19 December
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- Vanuatu quake: Hospitals under pressure as death, damage toll grows
By Harry Pearl of BenarNews Vanuatu is taking stock of damage from a powerful 7.3 magnitude earthquake that has killed at least 14 people and collapsed buildings in the capital Port Vila, as the first trickle of international assistance began arriving in the disaster-prone Pacific nation. The quake rattled the ...11 hours ago
- Civil society groups call on NZ to bar new Israeli envoy over ‘flagrant’ Gaza genocide
Asia Pacific Report A broad coalition of civil society organisations in Aotearoa New Zealand have signed an open letter to Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters urging the coalition government to refuse to accept the credentials of a new Israeli ambassador while the state continues to disregard international law and to ...14 hours ago
- Mediawatch: The good, bad and weird media in 2024
Biggest flip-flop; best leading media by the nose; the Billy Connolly prize for breaking news about a single animal - Mediawatch's not-very-prestigious and not-at-all coveted annual media awards. ...16 hours ago
- Vanuatu quake: Services still down nearly 24 hours after Port Vila hit
By Caleb Fotheringham, RNZ Pacific journalist World Vision’s Vanuatu country director says electricity and water are still affected in the capital Port Vila and strategic bridges connecting the city are damaged, nearly 24 hours after a 7.3 earthquake just before 1pm on Tuesday afternoon. The city has had multiple aftershocks ...17 hours ago
- Vanuatu quake: State of emergency declared, Fiji’s Rabuka offers help
By Monika Singh of Wansolwara Vanuatu is now in a state of emergency with at least 14 confirmed deaths following a 7.3 magnitude earthquake that struck the capital Port Vila yesterday, followed bya 6.1 quake and other after shocks today. According to the National Disaster Management Office (NDMO) in Vanuatu, ...18 hours ago
- Christmas can be challenging for people with hearing loss. Here are 7 ways you can help
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Katie Ekberg, Senior Lecturer, College of Nursing and Health Sciences, Flinders University Paulina Rojas/Shutterstock For many people, Christmas can be the most social time of the year. The holiday period is often filled with parties, lunches, dinners and celebrations of all ...19 hours ago
- If Treasury forecasts are right, it could be a decade before Australia is ‘back in black’
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By John Hawkins, Senior Lecturer, Canberra School of Politics, Economics and Society, University of Canberra After two successive surpluses, the federal budget will be back in deficit in 2024–25, according to the much-anticipated budget update released on Wednesday. Known as the Mid-Year Economic ...20 hours ago
- Lake Alice Payments Discriminatory
“While we applaud the Govt for trying to do the right thing for Lake Alice survivors & in recognising international recommendations, why is this Govt not doing right by all other survivors and recognising domestic recommendations?” Ms Cooper and ...21 hours ago
- Attorney-general ‘appalled’ after Judge and former doctor verbally abuse Winston Peters ...
Attorney-general Judith Collins said she was aware of what happened and was "appalled by it". ...22 hours ago
- Why Vanuatu should brace for even more aftershocks after this week’s deadly quakes: a seismologist...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Dee Ninis, Earthquake Scientist, Monash University Rescue services working in Port Vila, December 18 2024. Vanuatu Police Force/Facebook The death toll from Vanuatu’s earthquake disaster continues to rise, with international search and rescue operations underway to help people hit by the initial ...22 hours ago
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xox
Have you thought about politics as a career, Imperator?
Just as well I had finished my coffee! 🙂
+1
I know what you mean.
I was croaking it out to Lyn earlier through a bit of a damn throat cold, and having laughter problems as I read through the bits about wayward chinese customs officials turning up everywhere to be ignored or stared at…
Good thing that I’d already had the coffee…
Reminded me of Tom Scott’s cartoon back in the Muldoon era. He was tucked up in his little bed (frightened and alone) while Russian spies, bedecked in tunics and boots, were hanging from the light bulb cord, squashed under the bed, climbing in the window and peering out of the wardrobe cupboard.
Waahaa.
Also, a very appropriate pic. It should be put alongside other pictures in a series called “The Many Faces of National’s Corruption and Lies”.
great stuff
“Judith can’t believe she has to explain this all again”
Are you lot stupid or what, Judith looks irritable, taps her foot.
Yes, stupid to want our pollies to be thinking of what they can do to get the country running well and sustainably for the benefit of us all. Not filling in time while you make useful business connections for your own benefit Judith.
Pansy got tossed out of the flower bed. So should you. Grow your family business interests in your own time, under your own steam. Put your energy into your job, serving us. (Hollow cynical, maniacal laughter echoes on for days and months. Until the election.)
true to type.
Hi Rogue wondering about you this morning. See you ’round.
slingshot, just waiting for Chorus to do their bit, and we can return to our fire-side chats gw. Been a lengthy sabbatical, a busman’s holiday if you will, read some books and sparred with the summer haze.
Colins learning the art of lying for tilt at leaders job.
I read somewhere that because of all the pressure she has been under she said she has been ‘humanised’ Apparently she was not ‘human’ before.
like her pearls….Judith could be quite attractive if she smiled more
She can’t smile with all that botox!
…i think maybe she could have bad teeth….filed down little pointy sharks teeth
It’s black humour, but depressing all the same. Collins has a history of arrogantly re-writing the rules to suit herself.
But let’s be clear on one thing. If a left-wing pollie even looks like they’ve put a foot wrong, these righties are up it like the proverbial rat and drainpipe. They know perfectly well what a conflict of interest really is, and what corrupt conduct is. In general right wingers are very rule driven creatures – and particularly possessed by the letter of the law.
There are no fine interpretations here; Collins knows perfectly well she’s fucked up. And badly. She has no valid defense, so we are getting the bullying bluster instead. Unfortunately for her, she’s not charming with it.
Someone should do Judith the favour of explaining the Easter message to her – she’ll have to die before she can rise again.
On the other hand, crucifying her all the way to the election, a double bill with Key’s scampi ad, should see both of them gone in September. NZ does not love or expect corruption.
SM
Got to be aware of the public’s predilection? to swing like a weathercock in the wind. Too much opprobrium and next thing there would be a campaign of emotional support for her against the ‘orrible lefties. Think of the Campaign for Rowling as an example of a political push that seemed quite clear and reasonable yet going wrong.
Citizens for Rowling was personality driven – it was the author of its own demise. JC has graphically broken the rules, when the cabinet manual is drafted to proscribe even the appearance of ministerial partiality.
I wouldn’t count on this crocodile’s tears winning her much sympathy.
I do note though that on Herald online today a click on the tab “Should Collins resign as a minister ?”, presumably a facility for me to click ‘NO’ if that be my feeling, my vigorous clicking takes me nowhere. End of story.
Have the powers that be at the Herald decided……’enough is enough…..’ ?
Collins’ husband is not “only a Director with no financial interest” as Collins continually says.
He is a full time manager, possibly on $200k a year. Being also a Director he has a legal duty to care for the shareholder’s investment.
Question for Parliament:
Does your husband spend more than 20 hours a week on Oravida business!
Does your husband spend more than 20 hours a week as an employee in any business other than Oravida ?
Does your husband’s income from Oravida represent more than 25% of your family’s joint income?
I think I heard it mentioned in parliament that he is also a director of several other companies who do business with Oravida.
The Collins’, along with the Keys, the Goodfellows and several other top level National Party people seem to be deeply entwined and financially interested in and around this network of companies.
Oh and he’s been stealing our petrol for five and a half years.
no fee for being a director? ? if true there is a quid pro quo for him somewhere
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/politics/news/article.cfm?c_id=280&objectid=11240077
Which means of course that the test for ‘human’ has been wickedly skewed !
Much like when the old warhorse Muldoon, in tart response to barbs about a notable level of Kiwi emigration to Oz, spat back that the net result would be IQ gain on both sides of the Tasman.
Oh for the halcyon days when the PM of whatever stripe was not a foreign stooge !
This horror vida isn’t over yet for Collins -the more she try’s to deflect the deeper the hole. Predict if this goes on another few weeks after recess key won’t have any choice but to fire her to try and make this shitty mess disappear. Not before time. Call it karma. Next Keys interest and conflict with Oravida needs far greater exposure too.
and what might slaters reaction be if collins is effectively pushed???
Jelly doughnuts?
God if only Labour had a couple more like her.
She’s like Goff except with charm, boldness, chutzpah, aggression, connections, political hunger, and oh wait not like Goff at all.
Labour needs a No. 4 better than her. Events are in the saddle and she’s ridin’.
There must be something really really really serious to hide otherwise why else put herself through all this. I wonder why