ImperatorFish: Labour To Blame For Legal Costs

Written By: - Date published: 2:54 pm, April 3rd, 2012 - 8 comments
Categories: debt / deficit, Judith Collins, Satire - Tags:

Scott at Imperator Fish has kindly given us permission to syndicate posts from his blog – the original of this post is here.

The Finance Minister has confirmed that Treasury is yet again revising its budgetary estimates.

Bill English has long predicted that the government’s books will be in surplus by the 2014/15 financial year.

However, a predicted massive hike in legal costs to the Crown has forced Treasury to take another look at the Government’s accounts.

In particular, the prospect of ministers resorting in the future to taxpayer-funded litigation each and every time anyone says anything mildly critical about them, is expected to add a significant amount to the cost of running the country.

Treasury officials are particularly concerned that it would not be hard for anyone to come up with plenty of damning things to say about most members of John Key’s Cabinet.

Mr English today urged restraint, saying that the country could not afford any more criticism of Government ministers.

“We are in tough economic times,” said Mr English, “and that means we must all make sacrifices.

“I’m confident that the taxpayers of New Zealand understand that in the current environment it just isn’t financially responsible for people to go about criticising members of this government.”

Mr English said he did not accept that his ministerial colleagues were wasting taxpayer money by resorting to ridiculous lawsuits in order to stifle criticism.

“People like Judith Collins have a right to use legal action to cling desperately to what little reputation they have left.

“And let’s not lose sight of the fact that the real culprits are the Labour opposition. Labour are entirely to blame for this expected litigation blowout.

“If the likes of Trevor Mallard and Andrew Little would just stop exposing our incompetence we wouldn’t have any need to sue them.”

8 comments on “ImperatorFish: Labour To Blame For Legal Costs ”

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  1. ianmac 1
    3 April 2012 at 3:25 pm

    My dog bit your leg? No sir. It is your fault for putting your leg in my dog’s mouth!

  2. alex 2
    3 April 2012 at 3:41 pm

    Okay I might have bagged these satire posts last time one was published but this one is hilarious.

  3. tracey 3
    3 April 2012 at 6:16 pm

    Very Oionesque

  4. deuto 4
    3 April 2012 at 7:29 pm

    I discovered IF last year and have his blog on my favorites bar. Go there everyday to see his latest for a fix. As I am only just learning and feeling comfortable about commenting, I currently confine my comments to the Standard but hope IF keeps blogging and am please the Standard is carrying some of his posts.

    However, sometimes. like cryptic crosswords, I am lost as to what the clues are getting at – for example, his previous blog – http://www.imperatorfish.com/2012/04/career-change.html

    Its driving me crazy, so if anyone can help me, I will be grateful!

    • Scott 4.1
      3 April 2012 at 7:57 pm

      There’s an easy explanation for that post. Look at the date on which it was posted.

      • deuto 4.1.1
        3 April 2012 at 8:45 pm

        Duh…. Do enjoy your blog, as stated. That one threw me a little, but possibly because I do know the inside story on that business as have whanau in it! Thus know what goes on behind the scenes! And no, I am not telling: privacy and all that.

        Cheers

  5. Dr Terry 5
    3 April 2012 at 7:30 pm

    Fortunately for this government, tax-payers in this country are so easily misled, forgiving, caring not a bit whatever the hell happens! Everything and everybody appears to have been blamed for recent fiascos except God (as far as I know; but then, we know that Key is the Kiwi god – or was!)

  6. Frida 6
    5 April 2012 at 2:24 pm

    Nice one Scott. Loved it and shared it….