‘Hey, I am not sure why you have given me this dangerous weapon! I want to reassure you all, frankly, that at the end of the day, I am awktully a habitual horrible hair puller, but certainly not a hair cutting hound of the Baskervilles! Not yet, anyway!’
A quote from the movie Dirty Johnny starring the famous B-grade actor Johnny Key as himself:
”Uh uh. I know what you’re thinking. “Did he cut six times or only five?” Well to tell you the truth in all this excitement I kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum Scissor, the most powerful pair of scissors in the world and would cut you head clean off, you’ve gotta ask yourself one question: “Do I feel lucky?” Well, do ya, punk?
“with these giant scissors i will cut out all environment laws and the RMA, so that we can have 100% polluted streams and rivers. Yay dirty dairy and dirty politics!”
‘Shortly after this picture was taken, the Prime Minister had jumped off the stage and proceeded to run with the scissors while shouting “Austerity Measures!”‘
‘With this formidable pair of scissors, I intend committing my own self-circumcision. Everyone is welcome to ‘show some guts’ and watch the cutting at the CCFAC (Cabinet Cash For Access Club) buffet dinner. Tickets at only $1,500 + GST, per head!’
*Contact Spark for details and also go into a draw for a dainty carry case massaged in secret w-oil.
Note that “funny” Radar chappie sitting high and proud at the top table? Remember 2008 when Radar was helping English promote the shower anti Labour mockery?
A couple of recent cases suggest that the courts are awarding significant sums for defamation even where the publication is very small. This is despite the new rule that says plaintiffs, if challenged, have to show that the publication they are complaining about has caused them “more then minor harm.” ...
Damages for breaches of the Privacy Act used to be laughable. The very top award was $40,000 to someone whose treatment in an addiction facility was revealed to the media. Not only was it taking an age for the Human Rights Review Tribunal to resolve cases, the awards made it ...
It’s Friday and we’ve got Auckland Anniversary weekend ahead of us so we’ve pulled together a bumper crop of things that caught our attention this week. This post, like all our work, is brought to you by a largely volunteer crew and made possible by generous donations from our readers ...
Long stories short, the six things of interest in the political economy in Aotearoa around housing, climate and poverty on Friday January 24 are:PM Christopher Luxon’s State of the Nationspeech in Auckland yesterday, in which he pledged a renewed economic growth focus;Luxon’s focused on a push to bring in ...
Hi,It’s been ages since I’ve done an AMA on Webworm — and so, as per usual, ask me what you want in the comments section, and over the next few days I’ll dive in and answer things. This is a lil’ perk for paying Webworm members that keep this place ...
I’m trying a new way to do a more regular and timely daily Dawn Choruses for paying subscribers through a live video chat about the day’s key six things @ 6.30 am lasting about 10 minues. This email is the invite to that chat on the substack app on your ...
The podcast above of the weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar for paying subscribers on Thursday night features co-hosts & talking about the week’s news with regular and special guests, including: on Donald Trump’s first executive orders to reverse Joe Biden’s emissions reductions policies and pull the United States out of ...
The Prime Minister’s State of the Nation speech yesterday was the kind of speech he should have given a year ago.Finally, we found out why he is involved in politics.Last year, all we heard from him was a catalogue of complaints about Labour.But now, he is redefining National with its ...
Photo by Mauricio Fanfa on UnsplashKia oraCome and join us for our weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar with paying subscribers to The Kākā for an hour at 5 pm today.Jump on this link on YouTube Livestream for our chat about the week’s news with myself , plus regular guests and ...
Aotearoa's science sector is broken. For 35 years it has been run on a commercial, competitive model, while being systematically underfunded. Which means we have seven different crown research institutes and eight different universities - all publicly owned and nominally working for the public good - fighting over the same ...
One of the best speakers I ever saw was Sir Paul Callaghan.One of the most enthusiastic receptions I have ever, ever seen for a speaker was for Sir Paul Callaghan.His favourite topic was: Aotearoa and what we were doing with it.He did not come to bury tourism and agriculture but ...
The Tertiary Education Union is predicting a “brutal year” for the tertiary sector as 240,000 students and teachers at Te Pūkenga face another year of uncertainty. The Labour Party are holding their caucus retreat, with Chris Hipkins still reflecting on their 2023 election loss and signalling to media that new ...
The Prime Minister’s State of the Nation speech is an exercise in smoke and mirrors which deflects from the reality that he has overseen the worst economic growth in 30 years, said NZCTU Te Kauae Kaimahi President Richard Wagstaff. “Luxon wants to “go for growth” but since he and Nicola ...
People get readyThere's a train a-comingYou don't need no baggageYou just get on boardAll you need is faithTo hear the diesels hummingDon't need no ticketYou just thank the LordSongwriter: Curtis MayfieldYou might have seen Bishop Mariann Edgar Budde's speech at the National Prayer Service in the US following Trump’s elevation ...
Long stories short, the six things of interest in the political economy in Aotearoa around housing, climate and poverty on Thursday January 23 are:PM Christopher Luxon’s State of the Nation speech after midday today, which I’ll attend and ask questions at;Luxon is expected to announce “new changes to incentivise research ...
I’m trying a new way to do a more regular and timely daily Dawn Choruses for paying subscribers through a live video chat about the day’s key six things @ 6.30 am lasting about 10 minues. This email is the invite to that chat on the substack app on your ...
Yesterday, Trump pardoned the founder of Silk Road - a criminal website designed to anonymously trade illicit drugs, weapons and services. The individual had been jailed for life in 2015 after an FBI sting.But libertarian interest groups had lobbied Donald Trump, saying it was “government overreach” to imprison the man, ...
The Prime Minister will unveil more of his economic growth plan today as it becomes clear that the plan is central to National’s election pitch in 2026. Christopher Luxon will address an Auckland Chamber of Commerce meeting with what is being billed a “State of the Nation” speech. Ironically, after ...
This video includes personal musings and conclusions of the creator climate scientist Dr. Adam Levy. It is presented to our readers as an informed perspective. Please see video description for references (if any). 2025 has only just begun, but already climate scientists are working hard to unpick what could be in ...
The NZCTU’s view is that “New Zealand’s future productivity to 2050” is a worthwhile topic for the upcoming long-term insights briefing. It is important that Ministers, social partners, and the New Zealand public are aware of the current and potential productivity challenges and opportunities we face and the potential ...
The NZCTU supports a strengthening of the Commerce Act 1986. We have seen a general trend of market consolidation across multiple sectors of the New Zealand economy. Concentrated market power is evident across sectors such as banking, energy generation and supply, groceries, telecommunications, building materials, fuel retail, and some digital ...
The maxim is as true as it ever was: give a small boy and a pig everything they want, and you will get a good pig and a terrible boy.Elon Musk the child was given everything he could ever want. He has more than any one person or for that ...
A food rescue organisation has had to resort to an emergency plea for donations via givealittle because of uncertainty about whether Government funding will continue after the end of June. Photo: Getty ImagesLong stories short in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, poverty and climate on Wednesday, January 22: Kairos Food ...
Leo Molloy's recent "shoplifting" smear against former MP Golriz Ghahraman has finally drawn public attention to Auror and its database. And from what's been disclosed so far, it does not look good: The massive privately-owned retail surveillance network which recorded the shopping incident involving former MP Golriz Ghahraman is ...
The defence of common law qualified privilege applies (to cut short a lot of legal jargon) when someone tells someone something in good faith, believing they need to know it. Think: telling the police that the neighbour is running methlab or dobbing in a colleague to the boss for stealing. ...
NZME plans to cut 38 jobs as it reorganises its news operations, including the NZ Herald, BusinessDesk, and Newstalk ZB. It said it planned to publish and produce fewer stories, to focus on those that engage audience. E tū are calling on the Government to step in and support the ...
Data released by Statistics New Zealand today showed that inflation remains unchanged at 2.2%, defying expectations of further declines, said NZCTU Te Kauae Kaimahi Economist Craig Renney. “While inflation holding steady might sound like good news, the reality is that prices for the basics—like rent, energy, and insurance—are still rising. ...
I never mentioned anythingAbout the songs that I would singOver the summer, when we'd go on tourAnd sleep on floors and drink the bad beerI think I left it unclearSong: Bad Beer.Songwriter: Jacob Starnes Ewald.Last night, I was watching a movie with Fi and the kids when I glanced ...
Last night I spoke about the second inauguration of Donald Trump with in a ‘pop-up’ Hoon live video chat on the Substack app on phones.Here’s the summary of the lightly edited video above:Trump's actions signify a shift away from international law.The imposition of tariffs could lead to increased inflation ...
An interesting article in Stuff a few weeks ago asked a couple of interesting questions in it’s headline, “How big can Auckland get? And how big is too big?“. Unfortunately, the article doesn’t really answer those questions, instead focusing on current growth projections, but there were a few aspects to ...
Today is Donald J Trump’s second inauguration ceremony.I try not to follow too much US news, and yet these developments are noteworthy and somehow relevant to us here.Only hours in, parts of their Project 2025 ‘think/junk tank’ policies — long planned and signalled — are already live:And Elon Musk, who ...
How long is it going to take for the MAGA faithful to realise that those titans of Big Tech and venture capital sitting up close to Donald Trump this week are not their allies, but The Enemy? After all, the MAGA crowd are the angry victims left behind by the ...
California Burning: The veteran firefighters of California and Los Angeles called it “a perfect storm”. The hillsides and canyons were full of “fuel”. The LA Fire Department was underfunded, below-strength, and inadequately-equipped. A key reservoir was empty, leaving fire-hydrants without the water pressure needed for fire hoses. The power companies had ...
The Waitangi Tribunal has been one of the most effective critics of the government, pointing out repeatedly that its racist, colonialist policies breach te Tiriti o Waitangi. While it has no powers beyond those of recommendation, its truth-telling has clearly gotten under the government's skin. They had already begun to ...
I don't mind where you come fromAs long as you come to meBut I don't like illusionsI can't see them clearlyI don't care, no I wouldn't dareTo fix the twist in youYou've shown me eventually what you'll doSong: Shimon Moore, Emma Anzai, Antonina Armato, and Tim James.National Hugging Day.Today, January ...
Is Rwanda turning into a country that seeks regional dominance and exterminates its rivals? This is a contention examined by Dr Michela Wrong, and Dr Maria Armoudian. Dr Wrong is a journalist who has written best-selling books on Africa. Her latest, Do Not Disturb. The story of a political murder ...
The economy isn’t cooperating with the Government’s bet that lower interest rates will solve everything, with most metrics indicating per-capita GDP is still contracting faster and further than at any time since the 1990-96 series of government spending and welfare cuts. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāLong stories short in ...
Hi,Today is the day sexual assaulter and alleged rapist Donald Trump officially became president (again).I was in a meeting for three hours this morning, so I am going to summarise what happened by sharing my friend’s text messages:So there you go.Welcome to American hell — which includes all of America’s ...
This is a re-post from the Climate BrinkI have a new paper out today in the journal Dialogues on Climate Change exploring both the range of end-of-century climate outcomes in the literature under current policies and the broader move away from high-end emissions scenarios. Current policies are defined broadly as policies in ...
Long story short: I chatted last night with ’s on the substack app about the appointment of Chris Bishop to replace Simeon Brown as Transport Minister. We talked through their different approaches and whether there’s much room for Bishop to reverse many of the anti-cycling measures Brown adopted.Our chat ...
Last night I chatted with Northland emergency doctor on the substack app for subscribers about whether the appointment of Simeon Brown to replace Shane Reti as Health Minister. We discussed whether the new minister can turn around decades of under-funding in real and per-capita terms. Our chat followed his ...
Christopher Luxon is every dismal boss who ever made you wince, or roll your eyes, or think to yourself I have absolutely got to get the hell out of this place.Get a load of what he shared with us at his cabinet reshuffle, trying to be all sensitive and gracious.Dr ...
The text of my submission to the Ministry of Health's unnecessary and politicised review of the use of puberty blockers for young trans and nonbinary people in Aotearoa. ...
Hi,Last night one of the world’s biggest social media platforms, TikTok, became inaccessible in the United States.Then, today, it came back online.Why should we care about a social network that deals in dance trends and cute babies? Well — TikTok represents a lot more than that.And its ban and subsequent ...
Sometimes I wake in the middle of the nightAnd rub my achin' old eyesIs that a voice from inside-a my headOr does it come down from the skies?"There's a time to laugh butThere's a time to weepAnd a time to make a big change"Wake-up you-bum-the-time has-comeTo arrange and re-arrange and ...
Former Health Minister Shane Reti was the main target of Luxon’s reshuffle. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāLong stories short to start the year in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, poverty and climate: Christopher Luxon fired Shane Reti as Health Minister and replaced him with Simeon Brown, who Luxon sees ...
Yesterday, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon announced a cabinet reshuffle, which saw Simeon Brown picking up the Health portfolio as it’s been taken off Dr Shane Reti, and Transport has been given to Chris Bishop. Additionally, Simeon’s energy and local government portfolios now sit with Simon Watts. This is very good ...
The sacking of Health Minister Shane Reti yesterday had an air of panic about it. A media advisory inviting journalists to a Sunday afternoon press conference at Premier House went out on Saturday night. Caucus members did not learn that even that was happening until yesterday morning. Reti’s fate was ...
Yesterday’s demotion of Shane Reti was inevitable. Reti’s attempt at a re-assuring bedside manner always did have a limited shelf life, and he would have been a poor and apologetic salesman on the campaign trail next year. As a trained doctor, he had every reason to be looking embarrassed about ...
A listing of 25 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Sun, January 12, 2025 thru Sat, January 18, 2025. This week's roundup is again published soleley by category. We are still interested in feedback to hone the categorization, so if ...
After another substantial hiatus from online Chess, I’ve been taking it up again. I am genuinely terrible at five-minute Blitz, what with the tight time constraints, though I periodically con myself into thinking that I have been improving. But seeing as my past foray into Chess led to me having ...
Rise up o children wont you dance with meRise up little children come and set me freeRise little ones riseNo shame no fearDon't you know who I amSongwriter: Rebecca Laurel FountainI’m sure you know the go with this format. Some memories, some questions, letsss go…2015A decade ago, I made the ...
In 2017, when Ghahraman was elected to Parliament as a Green MP, she recounted both the highlights and challenges of her role -There was love, support, and encouragement.And on the flipside, there was intense, visceral and unchecked hate.That came with violent threats - many of them. More on that later.People ...
It gives me the biggest kick to learn that something I’ve enthused about has been enough to make you say Go on then, I'm going to do it. The e-bikes, the hearing aids, the prostate health, the cheese puffs. And now the solar power. Yes! Happy to share the details.We ...
Skeptical Science is partnering with Gigafact to produce fact briefs — bite-sized fact checks of trending claims. This fact brief was written by Sue Bin Park from the Gigafact team in collaboration with members from our team. You can submit claims you think need checking via the tipline. Can CO2 be ...
The old bastard left his ties and his suitA brown box, mothballs and bowling shoesAnd his opinion so you'd never have to choosePretty soon, you'll be an old bastard tooYou get smaller as the world gets bigThe more you know you know you don't know shit"The whiz man" will never ...
..Thanks for reading Frankly Speaking ! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.The Numbers2024 could easily have been National’s “Annus Horribilis” and 2025 shows no signs of a reprieve for our Landlord PM Chris Luxon and his inept Finance Minister Nikki “Noboats” Willis.Several polls last year ...
This Friday afternoon, Māori Development Minister Tama Potaka announced an overhaul of the Waitangi Tribunal.The government has effectively cleared house - appointing 8 new members - and combined with October’s appointment of former ACT leader Richard Prebble, that’s 9 appointees.[I am not certain, but can only presume, Prebble went in ...
The state of the current economy may be similar to when National left office in 2017.In December, a couple of days after the Treasury released its 2024 Half Year Economic and Fiscal Update (HEYFU24), Statistics New Zealand reported its estimate for volume GDP for the previous September 24 quarter. Instead ...
So what becomes of you, my love?When they have finally stripped you ofThe handbags and the gladragsThat your poor old granddadHad to sweat to buy you, babySongwriter: Mike D'aboIn yesterday’s newsletter, I expressed sadness at seeing Golriz Ghahraman back on the front pages for shoplifting. As someone who is no ...
It’s Friday and time for another roundup of things that caught our attention this week. This post, like all our work, is brought to you by a largely volunteer crew and made possible by generous donations from our readers and fans. If you’d like to support our work, you can join ...
Note: This Webworm discusses sexual assault and rape. Please read with care.Hi,A few weeks ago I reported on how one of New Zealand’s richest men, Nick Mowbray (he and his brother own Zuru and are worth an estimated $20 billion), had taken to sharing posts by a British man called ...
The final Atlas Network playbook puzzle piece is here, and it slipped in to Aotearoa New Zealand with little fan fare or attention. The implications are stark.Today, writes Dr Bex, the submission for the Crimes (Countering Foreign Interference) Amendment Bill closes: 11:59pm January 16, 2025.As usual, the language of the ...
Excitement in the seaside village! Look what might be coming! 400 million dollars worth of investment! In the very beating heart of the village! Are we excited and eager to see this happen, what with every last bank branch gone and shops sitting forlornly quiet awaiting a customer?Yes please, apply ...
Much discussion has been held over the Regulatory Standards Bill (RSB), the latest in a series of rightwing attempts to enshrine into law pro-market precepts such as the primacy of private property ownership. Underneath the good governance and economic efficiency gobbledegook language of the Bill is an interest to strip ...
We are concerned that the Amendment Bill, as proposed, could impair the operations and legitimate interests of the NZ Trade Union movement. It is also likely to negatively impact the ability of other civil society actors to conduct their affairs without the threat of criminal sanctions. We ask that ...
I can't take itHow could I fake it?How could I fake it?And I can't take itHow could I fake it?How could I fake it?Song: The Lonely Biscuits.“A bit nippy”, I thought when I woke this morning, and then, soon after that, I wondered whether hell had frozen over. Dear friends, ...
This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections Asheville, North Carolina, was once widely considered a climate haven thanks to its elevated, inland location and cooler temperatures than much of the Southeast. Then came the catastrophic floods of Hurricane Helene in September 2024. It was a stark reminder that nowhere is safe from ...
Early reports indicate that the temporary Israel/Hamas ceasefire deal (due to take effect on Sunday) will allow for the gradual release of groups of Israeli hostages, the release of an unspecified number of Palestinian prisoners from Israeli jails (likely only a fraction of the total incarcerated population), and the withdrawal ...
My daily news diet is not what it once was.It was the TV news that lost me first. Too infantilising, too breathless, too frustrating.The Herald was next. You could look past the reactionary framing while it was being a decent newspaper of record, but once Shayne Currie began unleashing all ...
Hit the road Jack and don't you come backNo more, no more, no more, no moreHit the road Jack and don't you come back no moreWhat you say?Songwriters: Percy MayfieldMorena,I keep many of my posts, like this one, paywall-free so that everyone can read them.However, please consider supporting me as ...
This might be the longest delay between reading (or in this case re-reading) a work, and actually writing a review of it I have ever managed. Indeed, when I last read these books in December 2022, I was not planning on writing anything about them… but as A Phuulish Fellow ...
The Green Party is calling on the Government to stand firm and work with allies to progress climate action as Donald Trump signals his intent to pull out of the Paris Climate Accords once again. ...
The Green Party has welcomed the provisional ceasefire deal between Israel and Hamas, and reiterated its call for New Zealand to push for an end to the unlawful occupation of Palestine. ...
The Green Party welcomes the extension of the deadline for Treaty Principles Bill submissions but continues to call on the Government to abandon the Bill. ...
Foreign Minister Winston Peters has announced the new membership of the Public Advisory Committee on Disarmament and Arms Control (PACDAC), who will serve for a three-year term. “The Committee brings together wide-ranging expertise relevant to disarmament. We have made six new appointments to the Committee and reappointed two existing members ...
Ka nui te mihi kia koutou. Kia ora, good morning, talofa, malo e lelei, bula vinaka, da jia hao, namaste, sat sri akal, assalamu alaikum. It’s so great to be here and I’m ready and pumped for 2025. Can I start by acknowledging: Simon Bridges – CEO of the Auckland ...
The Government has unveiled a bold new initiative to position New Zealand as a premier destination for foreign direct investment (FDI) that will create higher paying jobs and grow the economy. “Invest New Zealand will streamline the investment process and provide tailored support to foreign investors, to increase capital investment ...
Science, Innovation and Technology Minister Judith Collins today announced the largest reset of the New Zealand science system in more than 30 years with reforms which will boost the economy and benefit the sector. “The reforms will maximise the value of the $1.2 billion in government funding that goes into ...
Turbocharging New Zealand’s economic growth is the key to brighter days ahead for all Kiwis, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon says. In the Prime Minister’s State of the Nation Speech in Auckland today, Christopher Luxon laid out the path to the prosperity that will affect all aspects of New Zealanders’ lives. ...
The latest set of accounts show the Government has successfully checked the runaway growth of public spending, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. “In the previous government’s final five months in office, public spending was almost 10 per cent higher than for the same period the previous year. “That is completely ...
The Government’s welfare reforms are delivering results with the number of people moving off benefits into work increasing year-on-year for six straight months. “There are positive signs that our welfare reset and the return consequences for job seekers who don't fulfil their obligations to prepare for or find a job ...
Jon Kroll and Aimee McCammon have been appointed to the New Zealand Film Commission Board, Arts Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “I am delighted to appoint these two new board members who will bring a wealth of industry, governance, and commercial experience to the Film Commission. “Jon Kroll has been an ...
Finance Minister Nicola Willis has hailed a drop in the domestic component of inflation, saying it increases the prospect of mortgage rate reductions and a lower cost of living for Kiwi households. Stats NZ reported today that inflation was 2.2 per cent in the year to December, the second consecutive ...
Two new appointed members and one reappointed member of the Employment Relations Authority have been announced by Workplace Relations and Safety Minister Brooke van Velden today. “I’m pleased to announce the new appointed members Helen van Druten and Matthew Piper to the Employment Relations Authority (ERA) and welcome them to ...
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has delivered a refreshed team focused on unleashing economic growth to make people better off, create more opportunities for business and help us afford the world-class health and education Kiwis deserve. “Last year, we made solid progress on the economy. Inflation has fallen significantly and now ...
Veterans’ Affairs and a pan-iwi charitable trust have teamed up to extend the reach and range of support available to veterans in the Bay of Plenty, Veterans Minister Chris Penk says. “A major issue we face is identifying veterans who are eligible for support,” Mr Penk says. “Incredibly, we do ...
A host of new appointments will strengthen the Waitangi Tribunal and help ensure it remains fit for purpose, Māori Development Minister Tama Potaka says. “As the Tribunal nears its fiftieth anniversary, the appointments coming on board will give it the right balance of skills to continue its important mahi hearing ...
Almost 22,000 FamilyBoost claims have been paid in the first 15 days of the year, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. The ability to claim for FamilyBoost’s second quarter opened on January 1, and since then 21,936 claims have been paid. “I’m delighted people have made claiming FamilyBoost a priority on ...
The Government has delivered a funding boost to upgrade critical communication networks for Maritime New Zealand and Coastguard New Zealand, ensuring frontline search and rescue services can save lives and keep Kiwis safe on the water, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Associate Transport Minister Matt Doocey say. “New Zealand has ...
Mahi has begun that will see dozens of affordable rental homes developed in Gisborne - a sign the Government’s partnership with Iwi is enabling more homes where they’re needed most, Associate Housing Minister Tama Potaka says. Mr Potaka attended a sod-turning ceremony to mark the start of earthworks for 48 ...
New Zealand welcomes the ceasefire deal to end hostilities in Gaza, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. “Over the past 15 months, this conflict has caused incomprehensible human suffering. We acknowledge the efforts of all those involved in the negotiations to bring an end to the misery, particularly the US, Qatar ...
The Associate Minster of Transport has this week told the community that work is progressing to ensure they have a secure and suitable shipping solution in place to give the Island certainty for its future. “I was pleased with the level of engagement the Request for Information process the Ministry ...
Associate Health Minister David Seymour says he is proud of the Government’s commitment to increasing medicines access for New Zealanders, resulting in a big uptick in the number of medicines being funded. “The Government is putting patients first. In the first half of the current financial year there were more ...
New Zealand's first-class free trade deal and investment treaty with the United Arab Emirates (UAE) have been signed. In Abu Dhabi, together with UAE President His Highness Sheikh Mohammed bin Zayed, New Zealand Prime Minister, Christopher Luxon, witnessed the signing of the Comprehensive Economic Partnership Agreement (CEPA) and accompanying investment treaty ...
The latest NZIER Quarterly Survey of Business Opinion, which shows the highest level of general business confidence since 2021, is a sign the economy is moving in the right direction, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. “When businesses have the confidence to invest and grow, it means more jobs and higher ...
Events over the last few weeks have highlighted the importance of strong biosecurity to New Zealand. Our staff at the border are increasingly vigilant after German authorities confirmed the country's first outbreak of foot and mouth disease (FMD) in nearly 40 years on Friday in a herd of water buffalo ...
Associate Justice Minister Nicole McKee reminds the public that they now have an opportunity to have their say on the rewrite of the Arms Act 1983. “As flagged prior to Christmas, the consultation period for the Arms Act rewrite has opened today and will run through until 28 February 2025,” ...
Complaints about disruptive behaviour now handled in around 13 days (down from around 60 days a year ago) 553 Section 55A notices issued by Kāinga Ora since July 2024, up from 41 issued during the same period in the previous year. Of that 553, first notices made up around 83 ...
The time it takes to process building determinations has improved significantly over the last year which means fewer delays in homes being built, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “New Zealand has a persistent shortage of houses. Making it easier and quicker for new homes to be built will ...
Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden is pleased to announce the annual list of New Zealand’s most popular baby names for 2024. “For the second consecutive year, Noah has claimed the top spot for boys with 250 babies sharing the name, while Isla has returned to the most popular ...
Work is set to get underway on a new bus station at Westgate this week. A contract has been awarded to HEB Construction to start a package of enabling works to get the site ready in advance of main construction beginning in mid-2025, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.“A new Westgate ...
Minister for Children and for Prevention of Family and Sexual Violence Karen Chhour is encouraging people to use the resources available to them to get help, and to report instances of family and sexual violence amongst their friends, families, and loved ones who are in need. “The death of a ...
An A-to-Z cheat sheet to help you keep up with the awards chat this year.It’s hard to stay on top of awards buzz here in Aotearoa, especially when all the announcements tend to happen when we’re all off the grid and at the beach. The Golden Globes, for example, ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By David Lowe, Chair in Contemporary History, Deakin University After many years of heated debate over whether January 26 is an appropriate date to celebrate Australia Day – with some councils and other groups shifting away from it – the tide appears to ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Nick Whiterod, Science Program Manager, Goyder Institute for Water Research Coorong, Lower Lakes and Murray Mouth Research Centre, University of Adelaide Nick Whiterod Murray crayfish once thrived in the southern Murray-Darling Basin. The species was found everywhere from the headwaters of ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Wendy Hargreaves, Senior Learning Advisor, University of Southern Queensland There are two verses to Advance Australia Fair, but do you know the second? Probably not. It’s in our citizenship booklet, Our Common Bond, suggesting Aussies know it and new citizens could be ...
We round up the best of the homegrown content coming to your screens this year. This is an excerpt from our weekly pop culture newsletter Rec Room. Sign up here. 2025 is a brand new year, and with it comes a brand new year of television and films. While the local ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Peter Bridgewater, Adjunct Professor in Conservation, University of Canberra Getty Images/Servais Mont Existing policies to tackle environmental challenges fail to take into account that biodiversity loss, climate change and pollution are intertwined crises and produce compounding and intensifying impacts. Policy ...
Following the obscene spectacle of Trump’s inauguration, in which he enunciated his far-right agenda including mass deportations and imperialist expansionism, New Zealand’s politicians are pitching to “work with” Washington as closely as ...
As part of our series exploring how New Zealanders live and our relationship with money, a 50-year-old who volunteers at an op shop explains her approach to spending and saving. Want to be part of The Cost of Being? Fill out the questionnaire here.Gender: Female. Age: 50. Ethnicity: NZ European. ...
The country can’t afford to lose any more skilled workers - the reforms Minister Reti will now drive will only succeed if the Government properly respects and values the existing workforce who now face more uncertainty on top of a year of restructuring. ...
Minister Nicola Willis and the Commerce Commission are set to put big retailers, not just supermarkets, under scrutiny The post Govt to crack down on retail monopolies appeared first on Newsroom. ...
Kelsey Teneti is blossoming in the Black Ferns Sevens. Contracted since 2020 she hardly got a look in until after the Paris Olympics in July 2024. In the first two tournaments of the 2024-25 SVNS series, Teneti ran amok as New Zealand made the final in Dubai and captured the title ...
A rolling maul of policy announcements has been promised to attract foreign investment, explains The Bulletin’s Stewart Sowman-Lund. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign up here. ...
Analysis: After poor poll results for his party and on the country’s economic direction, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon is declaring action stations on business competition, planning laws and health and safety laws.His second State of the Nation speech included a litany of frustrations at systemic failures to change economic settings, ...
In the pursuit of growth it’s yes to mining, yes to tourism, yes to an overhaul of the science sector, and no to saying no, writes Toby Manhire from the PM’s state of the nation speech in Auckland. Growth, said Christopher Luxon yesterday. Growth, growth, growth. Growth “unlocked”, he said. ...
The government announced some big changes to the science and research sector this week. Here’s what you need to know. On Thursday, outgoing science minister Judith Collins announced major changes to New Zealand’s science sector that will impact several thousand staff working across Callaghan Innovation and the Crown Research Institutes. ...
They say prevention is better than a cure. It is also a lot cheaper than a cure.A helpful new report on BMI and obesity seeks to clarify how we measure and define clinically relevant obesity, especially for treatment purposes.But with New Zealand’s health system under enormous pressure, we argue that the ...
Comment: My first wish for 2025 is that all the retired greyhounds, which came about through the end of greyhound racing in New Zealand, are rehomed well and become beloved family animal companions. ▶ While on the animal welfare theme, this also leads to my second wish for 2025 which is ...
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Shannon-Leigh Litt has always known the importance of witnesses in her professional life as a criminal defence lawyer.For the past 390 days, she’s had to find her own witnesses out on the street, usually in the early hours of the morning. It’s all part of her quest to claim a ...
NONFICTION1 Tasty by Chelsea Winter (Allen & Unwin, $55)Food without meat.2 More Salad by Margo Flanagan & Rosa Power (Allen & Unwin, $49.99)Food without meat.3 View from the Second Row by Samuel Whitelock (HarperCollins, $49.99)Rugby memoir.4 Wild Walks Aotearoa: A Guide to Tramping in New Zealandby Hannah-Rose Watt (Penguin ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra The Albanese government if re-elected will provide a $10,000 incentive payment to apprentices to work in housing construction. The promise will be announced by Prime Minister Anthony Albanese when he addresses the National Press ...
By Mark Rabago, RNZ Pacific Commonwealth of the Northern Marianas correspondent Two LGBTQIA+ advocates in the Northern Mariana Islands (CNMI) are up in arms over US President Donald Trump’s executive order rolling back protections for transgender people and terminating diversity, equity and inclusion programs within the federal government. Pride Marianas ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Matthew Ricketson, Professor of Communication, Deakin University This week Prince Harry achieved something few before him have: an admission of guilt and unlawful behaviour from the Murdoch media organisation. But he also fell short of his long-stated goal of holding the Murdochs ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Emma Rowe, Associate Professor in Education, Deakin University As Australian families prepare for term 1, many will receive letters from their public schools asking them to pay fees. While public schools are supposed to be “free”, parents are regularly asked to ...
Analysis - At first glance the Prime Minister's fresh plan to inject growth in the economy is a hark back to pre-Covid days and the last National government. ...
Labour Party MPs have kicked off the political year with a spring in their step and fire in their bellies, ready to announce some policies and ramp up the attack strategy.Clad in a casual shirt and jandals, leader Chris Hipkins entered the Distinction Hotel in Palmerston North, guns blazing and ...
COMMENTARY:By Nick RockelPeople get readyThere’s a train a-comingYou don’t need no baggageYou just get on boardAll you need is faithTo hear the diesels hummingDon’t need no ticketYou just thank the Lord Songwriter: Curtis Mayfield You might have seen Bishop Mariann Edgar Budde’s speech at the National Prayer Service ...
Now where can I find a pony tail!?!
This is how you hold them, right?
Health and safety ignorance on display.
Federated Farmers give Key the tools to stab NZ taxpayers in the back
Thankyou… Judith will love these to stab me in the back
NZ stand up comedian looks on at the highest paid clown in the land.
I failed the hammer test, how the hell do I use these?
Are these Def the last pair of scissors in NZ??
Hand those rubber band hair ties out now
Radar uses his mind control skills over fellow stand up comedian John Key
Radar: go on John Stab your self
John Key: First I lost my memory now Im losing control of my mind arrrgggh help.
“I got these scissors from Lorena Bobbitt”
I won’t need these for the dairy farmers’ haircut.
We’re taking suggestions from the floor: Which public services will we cut next?
Idiots spell-bound as idiot demonstrates unknown idiocy.
(Photo by Rachel Glucina)
“Andrew Little gave me these.”
Andrew Little gave me these saying:
“Now cut the crap!”
” Fieldays and the National government share a common slogan – Stay a step ahead of the sheep.”
I think Grant Robertson just won best caption of the day!
https://twitter.com/grantrobertson1/status/608484886723190785
haha yeap, those two diplodorkus’s sharing a joke with Philosoraptor.
Bit close to the bone a Labour MP talking about dinosaurs in caucus though.
What do you think, are tax cuts on, Radar? Really?
“We’ll need bigger ones for the cuts we’re planning.”
‘Hey, I am not sure why you have given me this dangerous weapon! I want to reassure you all, frankly, that at the end of the day, I am awktully a habitual horrible hair puller, but certainly not a hair cutting hound of the Baskervilles! Not yet, anyway!’
I wonder if these could remove hoskings lips from my…..
LOL! Nice one and accurate!
“Oooh, yuck, RED handles. Mustn’t touch.”
Judith, I have something for you. Where do you want it?
Oooo what tantil-lithing thithuzz
“I’m cutting through the crap – that’s why they’re aimed at the mouth.”
Pinocchio contemplates his future
“I cut short the careers of Clark, Goff, Shearer, Cunliffe, Norman, and I just got this new red pair for Little.”
Where’s my paper and rock? I am soo funny!
”At my Cabinet Meetings I always win rock-paper-scissors” [LOL]
Edward Scissorhands 2 starring the famous B-grade actor Johnny Key.
The Smiling Hairdresser.
A quote from the movie Dirty Johnny starring the famous B-grade actor Johnny Key as himself:
”Uh uh. I know what you’re thinking. “Did he cut six times or only five?” Well to tell you the truth in all this excitement I kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum Scissor, the most powerful pair of scissors in the world and would cut you head clean off, you’ve gotta ask yourself one question: “Do I feel lucky?” Well, do ya, punk?
“with these giant scissors i will cut out all environment laws and the RMA, so that we can have 100% polluted streams and rivers. Yay dirty dairy and dirty politics!”
Health cuts, education cuts, current affairs cuts, HAIR CUTS……
‘Shortly after this picture was taken, the Prime Minister had jumped off the stage and proceeded to run with the scissors while shouting “Austerity Measures!”‘
‘With this formidable pair of scissors, I intend committing my own self-circumcision. Everyone is welcome to ‘show some guts’ and watch the cutting at the CCFAC (Cabinet Cash For Access Club) buffet dinner. Tickets at only $1,500 + GST, per head!’
*Contact Spark for details and also go into a draw for a dainty carry case massaged in secret w-oil.
“I’ll cut through the red tape surrounding the tpp and if that doesn’t work at least I still have the tools too NZ all a big favour”
Note that “funny” Radar chappie sitting high and proud at the top table? Remember 2008 when Radar was helping English promote the shower anti Labour mockery?
“Thats right this is the pair of scissors I used to cut govt spending with since 2008 Id almost thought Id lost them”
“Geez thanks “
“Cut this, cut that, hell, I’d cut my own daughters ponytail if she’d just put some clothes on!
The size of these sissors is relative to the cut in price for a kg of milk solids.
Don’t count on the government to bail you out, we have not yet made a budget surplus in the last 7 budgets.
I hope you feilday cockies have a sense of humour.
Stay a step ahead of Fontera.
Fonterra