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Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 3:45 pm, September 1st, 2015 - 90 comments
Categories: caption contest - Tags:

john key money

90 comments on “Caption contest”

  1. mickysavage 1

    The flag design John Key really preferred …

  2. ‘PM shows off his hourly rate’

  3. Ant 3

    Rock-star shawl. Help yourself guys, there’s plenty more where this comes from!

  4. ‘John Key finally discloses just how much of his parliamentary salary he donates to charity each month’

  5. McFlock 5

    John key thoroughly ducked.

  6. maui 6

    PM thought he was untouchable in brazen counterfeiting scheme.

  7. mac1 7

    “I’ve got ten million of these!”

  8. At least the $10 notes look much better than that horrible cheesy grin.

  9. maui 9

    Government saves economy and endangered duck my massive print of almost real plastic ducks.

  10. les 10

    my new curtains…looking for matching carpet.

  11. Bill 11

    (Through gritted teeth) “Some fucker just mentioned Norway. Take em out back…”


  12. weka 12

    Sorry Kate, I can’t quite reach the head, but will a quick shit on the shoulder do?

    • Lanthanide 12.1


      • maui 12.1.1

        Took me a while too, Check out the background.

      • weka 12.1.2

        Kate Sheppard and a blue duck are behind Key.

        • Macro

          John thinks he’s worth 25 Kates

        • Lanthanide

          Still don’t get it.

          • weka

            The duck is looking at Kate, they’ve been having a conversation, and the duck says it can’t reach Key’s head to shit on it, but it can reach his shoulder. It’s just the visuals of the duck and its bum and the way it’s facing, it’s a classic blue duck stance I think, and I liked to think that that the duck and Kate would both be of a like mind about appropriate political behaviour towards Key…. oh never mind.

  13. Cat Weasel 13

    PM unveils new strategy for achieving that elusive surplus.

  14. weka 14

    PM grits his teeth as he holds the money the common people use.

  15. swordfish 15

    Fake holds up counterfeits

  16. swordfish 16

    Room full of counterfeits, one of which is human.

  17. feijoa 17

    This is how much money the country’s got left

    • half crown 17.1

      That is shit hot pal. Made me laugh, and lets face face it, we need a fucking laugh the way the fucking spiv is selling this once great country down the river.

  18. dv 18

    Look we have got a surplus.

  19. rod 19

    My real love, money, money, money. In a rich mans world.

  20. key holds up the latest book he has just finished reading

  21. maui 21

    Prime Minister gradually becoming more visible to the public due to hollowed out currency.

  22. Pat 22

    “….and this is my picture.”

  23. peteh 23

    Now you see it soon its gone

  24. Neil 24

    PM displays his new toilet paper.

  25. Chooky 25

    everyone and everything can be bought

    …including a nation’s flag

    …and the nation itself

  26. Mike the Savage One 26

    “Kim John Key”, “Leader on the Shining Path to the Eternal Brighter Future” proclaims, these are the intermediate, transitional new bank notes for you people. I have just handed in the draft proposals for MY new bank notes, to be printed in time during mid 2017. They will bear my handsome features, so you will all remember me, for eternity.

    New voting papers will be introduced also, by Elections NZ, bearing two options, aye or naye, and it will be my face next to the positive box to tick, and one other box with no name, for those so determinedly negative spoilers, who are always against me and MY “enlightened” government.

    This will be the new effective election system at play, streamlined, for delivering results, using the “leaner” and “better” public service approach, that we brought in.

  27. NZSage 27

    John just couldn’t hide his pleasure as he presented the first agenda item at Sky City’s AGM.

  28. Sirenia 28

    Kate bites evil man’s head

  29. JanM 29

    It’s ok, there’s plenty more – They’re off my tree in the back yard

  30. KickerXV 30

    “I too am just treading water”

  31. Macro 31

    johns contribution to the new flag.. if only it had a fern

  32. swordfish 32

    PM: If I had a dollar for every time I’ve lied to the media, this is how much I woulda made in August

    • swordfish 32.1

      PM: If I had a dollar for every time the media’s let me get away with those bare-faced lies, this is how much I woulda made in August

      • swordfish 32.1.1

        PM: if I had a dollar for every time I’ve let Mike Hosking slobber all over me, rubbing his wet, shiny nose against my cheek as I pat him on the head and stroke his fur while he excitedly wags his tail, this is how much I woulda made in August

  33. Ecosse_Maidy 33

    John Keys showed off his attempt at the new craze of adult coloring in books!

  34. Ecosse_Maidy 34

    Keys, insists…noooooo it’s a Real Banksy!!!!

  35. Ecosse_Maidy 35

    NZ Antiques Roadshow……..Keys……tries to get the bidding above $3………..come on these are real $10..u fucks………who will raise their offer to $3.50???

  36. CnrJoe 36


  37. Ecosse_Maidy 37

    You may call this printing money and giving it to the banks & corps..I prefer to call it Quantative Easing……

  38. Ecosse_Maidy 38

    Yes,,,,I will show you..this is what i was paid for a night out with Judith,Paula and the girls.

  39. Ecosse_Maidy 39

    I was offered Magic beans or this amount of Cash from The Chinese Gvt for the whole of the south island….You would be proud of me..I turned down the beans! that’s why i was a Banker and you lot aren’t.

  40. Ecosse_Maidy 40

    You wait till next week..when I show off the $1,000,000 notes!

  41. Ecosse_Maidy 41

    Bargain!!!! I Just sold my soul for this amount suckers!

  42. mikesh 42

    Take one last look, guys, we’re just about to bring in the cashless society.

  43. Ecosse_Maidy 43

    Keys shows off WINZs new food stamps for 100 families

  44. Ecosse_Maidy 44

    Keys, shows any one that will look and listen…his new postage stamp collection

  45. Ecosse_Maidy 45

    keys is presented with his new personalized bullet proof vest

  46. Ecosse_Maidy 46

    Keys demonstrates……new household solar panel..for rich people only

  47. Ecosse_Maidy 47

    Hey..who said i couldn’t multi task…..look a evil smile and using my fingers at same time..

    In your face critics!!!!

  48. Ecosse_Maidy 48

    I compromised!!!!!!……..My face is just all over the reverse!

  49. Ecosse_Maidy 49

    Right come on cabinet…its gonna take more than this for the hair transplant……..dig deeper!

  50. Ecosse_Maidy 50

    Hey, fuckwits, look what i won at the sky city casino!

  51. Melanie Scott 51

    “Wow, this is what I got for the whole of New Zealand – pity it’s only funny money!”

  52. Vanessa King 52

    If you work really hardyou can earn one of these cleaning the toilets in Parliament

  53. sabine 53

    and it only cost ya 89 million and a bit of change to print that.


  54. Ad 54

    The Prime Minister finally takes Colonial Viper’s advice (and just prints money)

  55. cogito 55

    Leading by ducksample.

  56. Enough 56

    It’s facilitation NOT compensation.

  57. cogito 57

    Key: “Look, no ponytails!”

  58. Gael 58

    And while you blind sheep out there are discussing the flag and the new pretty security tracking capable money we will be printing to prop up the economy in election year, parliament is in recess this week because…..

  59. Ron 59

    Money makes the world go round that clinking clanking sound.

  60. cogito 60

    Key: “Yup, well aktchually I just wanted to show the Security Council that we’ve got a pretty big sheet of $10 notes so we can definitely contribute to the refugee crisis in Europe”.

  61. Drowsy M. Kram 61

    “They’re Telfon-coated, just like me.”

    One blue polly behind a money wall
    One blue polly hanging with McCaw
    And if this blue polly should accidently fall
    Thanks to Crosby/Textor spin he’ll soon be standing tall.

  62. NZJester 62

    The Prime Minister shows off the wanted poster of the next native species the under funded DOC is going to hire hunters to accidentally go shoot instead the ducks they are meant to hunt.

  63. Geraldine Radovanovich 63

    Looks like a duck, quacks like a duck. WTF.

  64. miravox 64

    Loose change

  65. risildowgtn 65

    Nu Zilland is sold..

    this is what i got for it

  66. Paul Campbell 66

    We were going to use them as sheets, but we’re going to wait for the 100s

  67. fender 67

    Me, MY All Blacks and MY silver fern will be on the new $100 notes

  68. Dorothy Bulling 68

    Is this enough to buy the emperor his new clothes?

  69. fender 69

    Key combines his two obsessions: Derp face selfies and money.

  70. Chromophore 70

    John Key to media pack

    “Just relax, breath deeply and gaze at this picture for a minute or two and miraculously, you’ll spot the smiling face of God hovering above it.”

  71. kimu 71

    my new wallpaper has finally arrived. oh joy.

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