Imperator Fish: A sacred day
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- Date published:
10:54 am, April 25th, 2014 - 10 comments
Categories: Politics, Satire -
Tags: anzac day, imperator fish
Today is the day when we remember those who fell.
I plan to honour this sacred day by not indulging in political discourse of any kind until 1:00 pm.
At 1:00 pm the shops open and life returns largely to normal. At 1:00 pm I will resume my ceaseless efforts to destroy this monstrous government.
Until then this blog will be a politics-free zone. Until 1:00 pm you can be assured that I won’t be writing a word against the tyrannical and incompetent fools who govern us. If you are looking for commentary this morning on the evils of John Key and his awful government, who would sell us all down the river if there was even the smallest political advantage in it, and whom you absolutely should never vote for, don’t bother looking here.
Similarly, I won’t be making comment on any of the opposition parties. Not the Greens, not New Zealand first, and certainly not my beloved Labour Party for whom everyone should vote. No, I will be respectful and silent this morning about Labour and Labour’s leader, a great man who will lead us out of the darkness and save us from these evil neoliberal vampires.
It’s all about respect, and engaging in petty politics and cheap point-scoring does nobody any good. That’s why there will be no politics until 1:00 pm. Until 1:00 pm I plan to leave that fat bastard John Key well alone.
lprent: Imperator Fish generously allows us to repost some of his (usually satirical) posts. This one was too good to miss.
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Today's passing of the Government's Residential Tenancies Amendment Bill–which allows landlords to end tenancies with no reason–ignores the voice of the people and leaves renters in limbo ahead of the festive season. ...1 week ago
- Release: National Party urged to support modern slavery legislation
Labour is urging the Prime Minister to walk the talk and support legislation combating modern slavery. ...1 week ago
- Release: Labour has lost confidence in the Speaker
The Speaker of the New Zealand Parliament made an unprecedented decision on the government amendment to the Fast Track Approvals Bill last night. ...1 week ago
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Today’s announcement from the Government on its plan for new ferries throws more uncertainty on the future of the country’s rail network. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Nicola Willis’ smaller ferries will cost more
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- Bill to sanction unlawful occupation of Palestine
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- Release: Labour fully supports greyhound racing ban
The Government has done the right thing in moving to ban greyhound racing. ...2 weeks ago
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In response to a new report from ERO, the Government has acknowledged the urgent need for consistency across the curriculum for Relationship and Sexuality Education (RSE) in schools. ...2 weeks ago
- Govt introduces archaic anti-worker legislation
The Green Party is appalled at the Government introducing legislation that will make it easier to penalise workers fighting for better pay and conditions. ...2 weeks ago
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Thank you for the invitation to speak with you tonight on behalf of the political party I belong to - which is New Zealand First. As we have heard before this evening the Kinleith Mill is proposing to reduce operations by focusing on pulp and discontinuing “lossmaking paper production”. They say that they are currently consulting on the plan to permanently shut ...2 weeks ago - Swarbrick calls on Auckland Mayor to end delay of revival of St James Theatre
Auckland Central MP, Chlöe Swarbrick, has written to Mayor Wayne Brown requesting he stop the unnecessary delays on St James Theatre’s restoration. ...2 weeks ago
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- Internationally-trained doctors jump at chance to boost health workforce
Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says Health New Zealand will move swiftly to support dozens of internationally-trained doctors already in New Zealand on their journey to employment here, after a tripling of sought-after examination places. “The Medical Council has delivered great news for hardworking overseas doctors who want to contribute ...9 hours ago - PM appoints business leader to APEC Business Advisory Council
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has appointed Sarah Ottrey to the APEC Business Advisory Council (ABAC). “At my first APEC Summit in Lima, I experienced firsthand the role that ABAC plays in guaranteeing political leaders hear the voice of business,” Mr Luxon says. “New Zealand’s ABAC representatives are very well respected and ...2 days ago
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Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has announced four appointments to New Zealand’s intelligence oversight functions. The Honourable Robert Dobson KC has been appointed Chief Commissioner of Intelligence Warrants, and the Honourable Brendan Brown KC has been appointed as a Commissioner of Intelligence Warrants. The appointments of Hon Robert Dobson and Hon ...2 days ago
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The Government’s measures to reduce airport wait times, and better transparency around flight disruptions is delivering encouraging early results for passengers ahead of the busy summer period, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “Improving the efficiency of air travel is a priority for the Government to give passengers a smoother, more reliable ...2 days ago
- Ending contracted emergency housing in Rotorua
The Government today announced the intended closure of the Apollo Hotel as Contracted Emergency Housing (CEH) in Rotorua, Associate Housing Minister Tama Potaka says. This follows a 30 per cent reduction in the number of households in CEH in Rotorua since National came into Government. “Our focus is on ending CEH in the Whakarewarewa area starting ...2 days ago
- Vocational education and training decisions support return to regions
The Government will reshape vocational education and training to return decision making to regions and enable greater industry input into work-based learning Tertiary Education and Skills Minister, Penny Simmonds says. “The redesigned system will better meet the needs of learners, industry, and the economy. It includes re-establishing regional polytechnics that ...2 days ago
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The Government is taking action to better manage synthetic refrigerants and reduce emissions caused by greenhouse gases found in heating and cooling products, Environment Minister Penny Simmonds says. “Regulations will be drafted to support a product stewardship scheme for synthetic refrigerants, Ms. Simmonds says. “Synthetic refrigerants are found in a ...2 days ago
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Tertiary Education and Skills Minister, Penny Simmonds, has announced a new appointment to the board of Education New Zealand (ENZ). Dr Erik Lithander has been appointed as a new member of the ENZ board for a three-year term until 30 January 2028. “I would like to welcome Dr Erik Lithander to the ...3 days ago
- Government to celebrate Waitangi Day around NZ
The Government will have senior representatives at Waitangi Day events around the country, including at the Waitangi Treaty Grounds, but next year Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has chosen to take part in celebrations elsewhere. “It has always been my intention to celebrate Waitangi Day around the country with different ...3 days ago
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- Torture redress for survivors of the Lake Alice Unit
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It has been a busy, productive year in the House as the coalition Government works hard to get New Zealand back on track, Leader of the House Chris Bishop says. “This Government promised to rebuild the economy, restore law and order and reduce the cost of living. Our record this ...4 days ago
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- Greater reporting on Treaty settlement commitments
Mehemea he pai mō te tangata, mahia – if it’s good for the people, get on with it. Enhanced reporting on the public sector’s delivery of Treaty settlement commitments will help improve outcomes for Māori and all New Zealanders, Māori Crown Relations Minister Tama Potaka says. Compiled together for the ...4 days ago
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Mr Roger Holmes Miller and Ms Tarita Hutchinson have been appointed to the Charities Registration Board, Community and Voluntary Sector Minister Louise Upston says. “I would like to welcome the new members joining the Charities Registration Board. “The appointment of Ms Hutchinson and Mr Miller will strengthen the Board’s capacity ...4 days ago
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More building consent and code compliance applications are being processed within the statutory timeframe since the Government required councils to submit quarterly data, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “In the midst of a housing shortage we need to look at every step of the build process for efficiencies ...4 days ago
- Faster access to support through Innovation Fund
Mental Health Minister Matt Doocey is proud to announce the first three recipients of the Government’s $10 million Mental Health and Addiction Community Sector Innovation Fund which will enable more Kiwis faster access to mental health and addiction support. “This fund is part of the Government’s commitment to investing in ...4 days ago
- New Zealand to assist Vanuatu on earthquake response
New Zealand is providing Vanuatu assistance following yesterday's devastating earthquake, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. "Vanuatu is a member of our Pacific family and we are supporting it in this time of acute need," Mr Peters says. "Our thoughts are with the people of Vanuatu, and we will be ...4 days ago
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12:07pm
You referred to John Key as a ‘fat bastard’. You are wrong. By 1:00 pm, you might realise that Key is not really fat.
If Al Gore is fat then so is John Key! And he has a house by the sea.
Oh no! An awful void has opened up. Calling truce on Key’s evil, hypocritical, unscrupulous, poor-people bashing, running amok bastards and expressing instead gentle support for their humanity, is all too much for me. Bipolar indeed I am.
It is 12:24 and I cannot wait to express my concern. Drowning, drowning, dro…..
Ha ha. Agree with everything you didn’t just say.
Hey! It is past the 1pm post and it is not the last one. So speak up. How do we really really feel about the Government? Huh?
I hope to remember when that government fell.
September 20 2014.
New Zealand will be a better, brighter place in that future.
Pardon the pun but a “National Holiday” September 20 then Mac?
I’d make it a Feast Day, ianmac- fatted calves, (or tofu sausages for those inclined), home brew, dancing, street parties, the works.
We’d also sing-
“Dies gaudii, dies illa,
Solvet saeclum in favilla,
Teste David in I-predict.”
At 1.00pm, Australia and NZ can also return to being complete arseholes to each other as far as things like benefit entitlements and tax obligations; and simply revert to using that ANZAC ‘spirit’ as an excuse; and the current junta can immediately forget all those references to compassion, brother/sisterhood and concern for others, and revert to taking its citizenry for granted and treating the the rabble amongst them like complete arseholes (including to some extent, veterans and their families)
At 1pm we can forget about that ‘spirit’ as long as we remember the dead and injured.