ImperatorFish: Analysing The Reshuffle
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- Date published:
2:19 pm, December 13th, 2011 - 11 comments
Categories: national, Satire -
Tags: greek gods, titans
Scott at Imperator Fish has kindly given us permission to syndicate posts from his blog – the original of this post is here
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Analysing The Reshuffle
The King of the Gods, Zeus, yesterday announced a reshuffle of his pantheon, in an effort to freshen up his front bench.
Getting the pantheon lineup right was always going to be one of the trickier tasks facing the Father of Gods and Men, and he will have had to manage some bruised egos during the process.
One of the biggest beneficiaries is Hades, King of the Underworld. The Ruler of the Dead has been a strong performer over the last term and has been rewarded with an elevation to number four in the pecking order. Hades keeps the pits of Tartarus, but also assumes responsibility for economic development, science and innovation, tertiary education and associate finance.
Poseidon, the Earth Shaker, retains responsibility for the earthquake recovery, while Hephaestus remains in the engine room of Zeus’ administration, retaining the critical finance role.
With Apollo’s departure from the pantheon, Athena moves into the Justice role. Putting a god already at war with the legal profession into the role may be a gamble, but the King of the Gods will be relying upon Athena’s famed cleverness and skill in war to ensure all opposition to her is crushed.
Her brother, Ares, the God of War, picks up Defence after impressing with a number of aggressive corporate box displays, and he also gets State Services and an Associate Finance role.
The list is notable for the number of women promoted. In particular, Demeter gets agriculture, while Artemis gets Sports and Recreation.
Hera also moves up into the front bench, but retains her Social Development and Youth Affairs portfolios, after a strong performance in which she drove Heracles mad and destroyed his family. Zeus will be hoping she can do the same with other families.
Hermes remains towards the bottom of the list, but retains the Building and Construction and Customs portfolios.
But with any reshuffle there are inevitable losers. The biggest loser is Atë, who has been stripped of education and now slips out of the top tier, after a ruinous display of folly and delusion in her portfolio.
Later today the Titans announce a new leader. They will be hoping that a new leadership and front bench will increase their chances of ending a long exile in Tartarus. It is expected that an announcement will be made after lunch today.
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- Release: Labour fully supports greyhound racing ban
The Government has done the right thing in moving to ban greyhound racing. ...1 week ago
- Greyhound racing industry ban marks new era for animal welfare
After years of advocacy, the Green Party is very happy to hear the Government has listened to our collective voices and announced the closure of the greyhound racing industry, by 1 August 2026. ...1 week ago
- Rangatahi voices must be centred in Government’s Relationship and Sexuality Education refresh
In response to a new report from ERO, the Government has acknowledged the urgent need for consistency across the curriculum for Relationship and Sexuality Education (RSE) in schools. ...1 week ago
- Govt introduces archaic anti-worker legislation
The Green Party is appalled at the Government introducing legislation that will make it easier to penalise workers fighting for better pay and conditions. ...1 week ago
- Winston Peters – Kinleith Mill Speech
Thank you for the invitation to speak with you tonight on behalf of the political party I belong to - which is New Zealand First. As we have heard before this evening the Kinleith Mill is proposing to reduce operations by focusing on pulp and discontinuing “lossmaking paper production”. They say that they are currently consulting on the plan to permanently shut ...1 week ago - Swarbrick calls on Auckland Mayor to end delay of revival of St James Theatre
Auckland Central MP, Chlöe Swarbrick, has written to Mayor Wayne Brown requesting he stop the unnecessary delays on St James Theatre’s restoration. ...2 weeks ago
- He Ara Anamata: Greens launch Emissions Reduction Plan
Today, the Green Party of Aotearoa proudly unveils its new Emissions Reduction Plan–He Ara Anamata–a blueprint reimagining our collective future. ...2 weeks ago
- Fossil fuel lobbyist appointment to EECA board called out
The Green Party condemns the Government’s appointment of a fossil fuel lobbyist to the Energy Efficiency & Conservation Authority Board. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Boot camps must be shut down today
The Prime Minister has committed to shut down his government’s boot camps if there is evidence of harm to children – so he must do that today. ...2 weeks ago
- Greens echo OECD call for electricity market reform
The Green Party has welcomed the OECD urging the Government to re-examine separating ‘gentailers’ to make a fairer electricity market for New Zealanders. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Govt breaks Auckland housing promise
Housing Minister Chris Bishop has confirmed National has broken yet another election promise. ...2 weeks ago
- Government smokescreen to downgrade climate ambition
Today the ACT-National Coalition Agreement pet project’s findings on “no additional warming” were released. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Health NZ admits errors led to claimed deficit
Health New Zealand has exaggerated its deficit to justify job cuts. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: More cuts to research, science and innovation sector
The Government’s latest round of cuts to research and innovation targets the long-established and successful Marsden Fund. ...2 weeks ago
- Levelling the playing field for media advertising
Legislation that will repeal all advertising restrictions for broadcasters on Sundays and public holidays has passed through first reading in Parliament today, Media Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “As a growing share of audiences get their news and entertainment from streaming services, these restrictions have become increasingly redundant. New Zealand on ...18 hours ago - Inspector-General of Defence appointed
Today the House agreed to Brendan Horsley being appointed Inspector-General of Defence, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “Mr Horsley’s experience will be invaluable in overseeing the establishment of the new office and its support networks. “He is currently Inspector-General of Intelligence and Security, having held that role since June 2020. ...19 hours ago
- Fire and Emergency New Zealand final levy rates confirmed
Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden says the Government has agreed to the final regulations for the levy on insurance contracts that will fund Fire and Emergency New Zealand from July 2026. “Earlier this year the Government agreed to a 2.2 percent increase to the rate of levy. Fire ...19 hours ago
- More AML relief on the way for Kiwi businesses
The Government is delivering regulatory relief for New Zealand businesses through changes to the Anti-Money Laundering and Countering Financing of Terrorism Act. “The Anti-Money Laundering and Countering Financing of Terrorism Amendment Bill, which was introduced today, is the second Bill – the other being the Statutes Amendment Bill - that ...19 hours ago
- Hawke’s Bay Expressway moving at pace
Transport Minister Simeon Brown has welcomed further progress on the Hawke’s Bay Expressway Road of National Significance (RoNS), with the NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) Board approving funding for the detailed design of Stage 1, paving the way for main works construction to begin in late 2025.“The Government is moving at ...20 hours ago
- Government seeks partnerships to plant trees on Crown-owned-land
The Government today released a request for information (RFI) to seeking interest in partnerships to plant trees on Crown-owned land with low farming and conservation value (excluding National Parks) Forestry Minister Todd McClay announced. “Planting trees on Crown-owned land will drive economic growth by creating more forestry jobs in our regions, providing more wood ...20 hours ago
- Wide ranging legislation to make justice system more efficient
Court timeliness, access to justice, and improving the quality of existing regulation are the focus of a series of law changes introduced to Parliament today by Associate Minister of Justice Nicole McKee. The three Bills in the Regulatory Systems (Justice) Amendment Bill package each improve a different part of the ...20 hours ago
- Diverse skills in community trust appointments
A total of 41 appointments and reappointments have been made to the 12 community trusts around New Zealand that serve their regions, Associate Finance Minister Shane Jones says. “These trusts, and the communities they serve from the Far North to the deep south, will benefit from the rich experience, knowledge, ...20 hours ago
- Torture redress for survivors of the Lake Alice Unit
The Government has confirmed how it will provide redress to survivors who were tortured at the Lake Alice Psychiatric Hospital Child and Adolescent Unit (the Lake Alice Unit). “The Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse in Care found that many of the 362 children who went through the Lake Alice Unit between 1972 and ...21 hours ago
- A busy year in the House
It has been a busy, productive year in the House as the coalition Government works hard to get New Zealand back on track, Leader of the House Chris Bishop says. “This Government promised to rebuild the economy, restore law and order and reduce the cost of living. Our record this ...23 hours ago
- Consultation opens on working with engineered stone
“Accelerated silicosis is an emerging occupational disease caused by unsafe work such as engineered stone benchtops. I am running a standalone consultation on engineered stone to understand what the industry is currently doing to manage the risks, and whether further regulatory intervention is needed,” says Workplace Relations and Safety Minister ...23 hours ago
- Greater reporting on Treaty settlement commitments
Mehemea he pai mō te tangata, mahia – if it’s good for the people, get on with it. Enhanced reporting on the public sector’s delivery of Treaty settlement commitments will help improve outcomes for Māori and all New Zealanders, Māori Crown Relations Minister Tama Potaka says. Compiled together for the ...23 hours ago
- New appointments to the Charities Registration Board
Mr Roger Holmes Miller and Ms Tarita Hutchinson have been appointed to the Charities Registration Board, Community and Voluntary Sector Minister Louise Upston says. “I would like to welcome the new members joining the Charities Registration Board. “The appointment of Ms Hutchinson and Mr Miller will strengthen the Board’s capacity ...1 day ago
- Building consent processing times improve
More building consent and code compliance applications are being processed within the statutory timeframe since the Government required councils to submit quarterly data, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “In the midst of a housing shortage we need to look at every step of the build process for efficiencies ...1 day ago
- Faster access to support through Innovation Fund
Mental Health Minister Matt Doocey is proud to announce the first three recipients of the Government’s $10 million Mental Health and Addiction Community Sector Innovation Fund which will enable more Kiwis faster access to mental health and addiction support. “This fund is part of the Government’s commitment to investing in ...1 day ago
- New Zealand to assist Vanuatu on earthquake response
New Zealand is providing Vanuatu assistance following yesterday's devastating earthquake, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. "Vanuatu is a member of our Pacific family and we are supporting it in this time of acute need," Mr Peters says. "Our thoughts are with the people of Vanuatu, and we will be ...1 day ago
- Government takes steps to reduce card fees for Kiwis
The Government welcomes the Commerce Commission’s plan to reduce card fees for Kiwis by an estimated $260 million a year, Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly says.“The Government is relentlessly focused on reducing the cost of living, so Kiwis can keep more of their hard-earned income and live a ...1 day ago
- Review recommends ECE regulation shakeup
Regulation Minister David Seymour has welcomed the Early Childhood Education (ECE) regulatory review report, the first major report from the Ministry for Regulation. The report makes 15 recommendations to modernise and simplify regulations across ECE so services can get on with what they do best – providing safe, high-quality care ...1 day ago
- Offshore Renewable Energy Bill passes first reading
The Government‘s Offshore Renewable Energy Bill to create a new regulatory regime that will enable firms to construct offshore wind generation has passed its first reading in Parliament, Energy Minister Simeon Brown says.“New Zealand currently does not have a regulatory regime for offshore renewable energy as the previous government failed ...2 days ago
- Local Government (Water Services) Bill passes first reading
Legislation to enable new water service delivery models that will drive critical investment in infrastructure has passed its first reading in Parliament, marking a significant step towards the delivery of Local Water Done Well, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown and Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly say.“Councils and voters ...2 days ago
- Gene Technology Bill passes first reading
New Zealand is one step closer to reaping the benefits of gene technology with the passing of the first reading of the Gene Technology Bill, Science, Innovation and Technology Minister Judith Collins says. "This legislation will end New Zealand's near 30-year ban on gene technology outside the lab and is ...2 days ago
- New Zealand ratifies AANZFTA Upgrade
New Zealand has ratified the Upgrade to the Agreement establishing the ASEAN-Australia-New Zealand Free Trade Area (AANZFTA), Minister for Trade Todd McClay announced today. “ASEAN which is comprised of Brunei Darussalam, Cambodia, Indonesia, Lao PDR, Malaysia, Myanmar, Philippines, Singapore, Thailand, and Vietnam, is New Zealand’s fourth largest trading partner in two-way trade – ...2 days ago
- PM’s Space Prizes highlight talent and innovation
The inaugural winners of the Prime Minister’s Space Prizes showcase the depth and breadth of talent in New Zealand’s dynamic space and advanced aviation sectors, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Space Minister Judith Collins say. “The Government established these prizes to recognise and encourage innovative expertise and rising talent in ...2 days ago
- One-stop shop fast-track bill passes third reading
The coalition Government’s new one-stop shop fast-track consenting regime for regionally and nationally significant projects will help rebuild the New Zealand economy, say RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Minister for Regional Development Shane Jones. The Fast-track Approvals Bill passed its third reading in Parliament today. Applications for projects to ...2 days ago
- Antarctica New Zealand Board appointment
Foreign Minister Winston Peters has appointed Craig Ellison to the Board of Antarctica New Zealand. The appointment is effective from 18 December 2024 for a three-year term and brings the Board to its full capacity of seven members. “Mr Ellison joins the Board with a background in Antarctic ...2 days ago
- New diplomatic appointments
Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters has announced four new diplomatic appointments. “Our diplomats play an important role in ensuring New Zealand’s interests are maintained and enhanced across the world,” Mr Peters says. “It is a pleasure to announce the appointment of these senior diplomats from the Ministry of Foreign ...2 days ago
- Financial measure and capital allowance updated
The Government is adopting a new financial indicator and a new approach to capital allowances, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. These changes follow reviews, announced at the Budget, of the operating balance before gains and losses (OBEGAL) and the multi-year capital allowance (MYCA). “Since 2008, governments have used OBEGAL to ...2 days ago
- Lifting productivity key
Lifting the productive capacity of the economy is the key to realising New Zealand’s potential, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. “The Half Year Economic and Fiscal Update released today shows the Crown’s financial position has deteriorated over the past six years, but the economy has reached a turning point. “Inflation ...2 days ago
- Consultation on Arms Act rewrite to begin
Associate Justice Minister Nicole McKee has welcomed Cabinet’s decision to undertake public consultation on the rewrite of the Arms Act 1983. “Phase four of my firearms reforms is the rewrite of the Act and, as promised, we will be consulting with the New Zealand public. The consultation period will open ...2 days ago
- Government confirms reduction to Forestry ETS annual charge
The Government has today confirmed a 50 per cent reduction to the annual charge for forest owners participating in the forestry Emissions Trading Scheme (ETS), Forestry Minister Todd McClay announced. “This decision delivers on the Government’s promise to rebuild confidence in the forestry sector and support its role in achieving ...2 days ago
- First quarterly Oranga Tamariki performance data released
Children’s Minister Karen Chhour has welcomed the release of the first quarter of Oranga Tamariki performance data. “Since becoming Minister for Children, I have been clear that Oranga Tamariki must be relentlessly focused on the safety of children and young people in its care. “This is why I introduced key performance ...2 days ago
- Public to have their say on disability funding
The wider disability community will have their say early next year on how the Government should deliver disability support services that are fair, consistent, transparent, and sustainable, Disability Issues Minister Louise Upston says. “The Government is committed to better public services and building a disability support system that delivers better ...2 days ago
- Securing the skills and experience NZ needs
The Government is supporting businesses to secure the skills and experience New Zealand needs by continuing to refine the Accredited Employer Work Visa (AEWV). “A responsive immigration system is fundamental to rebuilding the economy,” Immigration Minister Erica Stanford says. “Earlier in the year, we made initial changes to the AEWV ...2 days ago
- Minimum wage set for 2025
The adult minimum wage rate will increase by 1.5 percent to $23.50 an hour from 1 April 2025, Workplace Relations and Safety Minister Brooke van Velden announced today. This minimum wage increase meets the NZ First-National coalition commitment to moderate increases to the minimum wage every year. Cabinet’s decision reflects ...2 days ago
- Extra security to again keep EDs safe this summer
Health Minister Dr Shane Reti is again reminding New Zealanders that violence against patients, visitors and health workers won’t be tolerated, with additional security for hospital emergency departments across the country this summer. “Staff and patients in our EDs deserve to feel safe when they’re working or visiting hospitals across ...2 days ago
- Q4 plan sets NZ up for growth and infrastructure
It will soon be easier to get things built in New Zealand due to the actions delivered by the Government as part of our Quarter Four (Q4) Action Plan, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon says. “The modern and reliable infrastructure New Zealand desperately needs is a lot closer thanks to the ...3 days ago
- Government getting local government back to basics
The Government has agreed to reforms that refocus local councils on delivering essential services and core infrastructure, spending responsibly, and operating under greater scrutiny, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown says.“Homeowners face the fastest rates rise in more than twenty years. Rates are out of control and the Government is taking ...3 days ago
- Cabinet circular paves way for better regulation to benefit everyone
Regulation Minister David Seymour says that changes to the way regulations are made will ensure the process is more efficient, transparent and effective. From 1 January 2025, government agencies making new regulations will follow a more simplified and streamlined process, saving time and energy by focusing only on what’s important. ...3 days ago
- Ministers recognise health volunteers
Seven outstanding individuals and organisations have been recognised in the 2024 Minister of Health Volunteer Awards. The recipients hail from across the country, and range in age from 17 to 90 years old. Their work includes leading exercise groups for people with lung conditions, school students supporting disabled people, and ...3 days ago
- New plan for reducing family and sexual violence
The launch in Auckland today of the second Te Aorerekura Action Plan for the prevention of family violence and sexual violence featured three government ministers, together to symbolise this government’s commitment to reducing harm from violence. The launch was hosted by Karen Chhour, as Minister for the Prevention of Family ...4 days ago
- GMO Bill Creates More Societal Division
Organics Aotearoa New Zealand (OANZ) last week completed another two days with Ministers, political leaders, Ministries and primary sector leaders sharing science knowledge, societal concerns, economic impacts and trade findings. ...59 minutes ago - Lake Alice redress payments won’t have sway on what other survivors receive
Lead minister of the government's response to abuse in care Erica Stanford said Cabinet looked at this case very separately. ...1 hour ago - Help Me Hera: I hate spending Christmas with my in-laws
I grew up in a family where Christmas was all about tradition and hospitality. My husband’s family takes a different approach. How do I get over my resentment and have a nice day? Want Hera’s help? Email your problem to helpme@thespinoff.co.nz Dear Hera The Christmas I had growing up was always quite lovely, ...1 hour ago - AI will continue to grow in 2025. But it will face major challenges along the way
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Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Steven Farram, Associate Professor in North Australian and Regional Studies (History), Charles Darwin University It is hard to comprehend the force with which Cyclone Tracy struck Darwin early on Christmas Day, 1974. It was so ferocious that it killed 66 people, partly ...2 hours ago
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- How a Cold War satellite and Robert Menzies changed the way Australian schools are funded
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- Swimming loses public funding but elite duo protected
High Performance Sport New Zealand will invest $162.8m into 36 national sporting organisations and athletes over the next four years, up from $131m in the four years leading up to this year’s Paris Olympics.From March next year, nearly $41 million per annum will go directly to national sports organisations for ...3 hours ago - Former National MP joins push for University of Waikato’s third medical school.
A former National MP and incumbent Hamilton City Councillor has been hired by the University of Waikato to advocate for its proposed third medical school. ...4 hours ago
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A new plan has been hatched to try to resolve a years-long fight to protect native fish at Transmission Gully. ...4 hours ago
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Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 19 December appeared first on Newsroom. ...5 hours ago
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Attorney-general Judith Collins said she was aware of what happened and was "appalled by it". ...18 hours ago
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But wot about Narcissus?
OMG what are going to get next – the hindu pathenon (who’d be Kali?) or the romans?
I’m just hoping that they will be able to work constructively with the Norse pantheon.
You mean with all of those hammers? Or the horns of mead.
Well the Norse have lost their working class roots so there are lot less hammers these days, though the taste for mead is still pretty universal.
Yawn this guy or gal is not left of anything except behind.
Comrade, a thousand apologies for my sins against the proletariat. I will purge myself of this rightist anti-worker sentiment by writing a lengthy self-denunciation on my blog.
[lprent: Can we then replicate that on the mimeograph and spread it across the blank walls. Perhaps a video?
Thanks for allowing us to replicate your posts. I have to figure out how to RSS feed them to reduce the labours of the workers. ]
Dave, you realize that I’m kind of right of center on many topics, left of center on others, have a great set of big green opinions and way left on a handful and way right on a few more. I also think that anyone who can’t program has wasted their life, that flying anywhere is completely daft when you have the net, wearing shoes should only be done when there is a risk of glass, etc etc…
It takes all sorts on the ‘left’.
Some of them (like me) would think this post was funny. Mind you, I guess you have to know the greek pathenon. I got introduced to it when I was being taught Latin at school.
Its all Greek to me.
http://redrave.blogspot.com/2011/11/perspectives-on-greek-revolution.html
No Maori seats in the new Pantheon?
Zeus better not piss off Hone Harawira 🙂
But will the judgment of Paris and the rage of Achilles come back to haunt the halls of Olympus?