Three strikes and you’re garrotted

Written By: - Date published: 12:10 pm, March 23rd, 2009 - 16 comments
Categories: act, humour, law and "order", national/act government - Tags:

Toad: Do you regret that comment on Eye to Eye?

Garrotte: Well, my position on the ACT list was announced after all the other candidates. That comment may have had something to do with that. But I got elected in the end, so I guess not.

Toad: Deborah Coddington said you told her on the show that your brother hates her. Is that true?

Garrotte: Yeah, it is. He does. I might have said it stone cold sober. I call a spade a spade, you know.

Toad: Some people find that a bit difficult to cope with. Did you find it difficult employing the right staff when you got into Parliament?

Garrotte: Hell no. I just asked the applicants if they thought William Bell should have got a bullet. Oh, and I asked the women if they were feminists. That sorted them out.

Toad: When the Attorney General’s report on your Three Strikes Bill came out, you were reported as saying ‘We’ve got too hung up on people’s rights.’ Do you think there is such a thing as fundamental human rights?

Garrotte: Yeah, for law-abiding mainstream New Zealanders there is. But not for crims, boongas, queers, lezzos, prostitutes, and assorted left-wing scum. At least we don’t have too many Jews and Gyppos here they are always carrying on about their rights. Anyway, that report was written by some oik in the Crown Law Office, so I don’t really care what it said.

Toad: With respect, David, Attorney General Chris Finlayson has confirmed that he doesn’t just sign off on Crown Law opinions, but considers them substantively himself.

Garrotte: Well, he’s a pansy and a wishy-washy liberal anyway, so what would you expect. I’m surprised he’s not in the Green Party.

Toad: And your Bill has also been criticised by the United Nations Human Rights Council as likely to violate two human rights conventions. Are you concerned about that?

Garrotte: Hell no! That Committee is full of wogs from places like Saudi Arabia and Qatar. What the hell would they know about human rights? There’s probably even a terrorist or two on it.

Toad: It’s been suggested that the increased prison muster resulting from your Three Strikes Bill may result in increased instance of prison assaults and rapes because many prisoners will be required to double-bunk. Are you concerned about that?

Garrottte: Not at all. Those low-life scum don’t have any rights. In fact a good rectal rogering or two in prison might make some of them think twice before committing a crime next time.

Toad: So you’re not concerned that some criminals could face disproportionately severe punishment on the third strike?

Garrotte: Not at all. Personally, I’d like to see them garrotted on the third strike, but the National Party has so many wish-washy liberal types that I know I’d never get that through.

Pages: 1 2

16 comments on “Three strikes and you’re garrotted ”

  1. volnay 1

    Is this for real?

  2. John Dalley 2

    You are taking the Piss, aren’t you?

  3. bobo 3

    Sounds if this is real, he was drunk again..

  4. bill brown 4

    What part of “parody” do you not understand?

  5. Ianmac 5

    Just go to show what happens when you don’t notice that you are being taped.

  6. BLiP 6

    How is it possible that this man garnered an income working in the field of Justice?

    An oik! Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.

  7. Kevin Welsh 7

    I am so looking forward to this clown having a “Jeff Gannon” moment sometime in the next 2.5 years.

  8. toad 8

    Thanks for the compliment Eddie.

    Has anyone else noticed the physical resmblance between Garrett and Enoch Powell of “Rivers of Blood” notoriety?

  9. Rex Widerstrom 9

    A beautifully pitched parody. One could well imagine these “restrained” answers being given whilst Garrett clearly bristled with what he trulywanted to say.

    Meanwhile DPF notes that Blaise Drinkwater notes Antonin Scalia’s comment on the Bill of Rights: that some rights are important and some aren’t (!!) but that “they were selected on the basis of, “what rights would a tyrant want to move against?'”.

    Given Garrett and the SST want to dilute or dispose of rights protected in the US, from double jeopardy and silence to protection from “cruel and unusual punishment” – and given that National seem unconcerned about the impact of letting them have their way – then I wonder how Key takes to being described as a tyrant by a notoriously conservative US Justice? 😈

  10. Whacky Lefty 10

    Are white people still exempt?

    I’ld really like someone to clarify the SST & ACT on when white/Asian people kill it doesn’t hurt so should get a medal?

    [lprent: Just been looking at your comments. You look like a troll in your various guises. Adding you to auto-moderation because you also look like someone we have banned]

    • Whacky Lefty 10.1

      To clarify, it’s troll like to ask questions of the seeming racial imbalance of causes the SST & ACT champion or dismiss?

      Well I say no it isn’t. It is a serious question worthy of consideration. (Possibly not express well in the first instance).

      A brown boy is stabbed to death by a white male and Garth calls for Home detention (& I seem to hear others call for a medal for him).

      I’m not against Home Detention, infact probbly a very good sentence as I don’t suspect he is generally a danger to other and with suitable programmes will rehabilitate well back into society. The support of a family is a positive factor in this.

      This should also be open to the majority of prisoners behind bars today.

      I await your apology in regards to your slur upon my person.

      [lprent: Sure looks like trollish to me. Specifically a wingnut trying to look like a moonbat]

  11. lyndon 11

    I put this just on my blog recently – which is a good place for things I don’t want people to see – but I thought you might appreciate it:

    Separated at birth?

  12. mike 12

    Hey – this is geat – finally a sensible person in government.

    He should be prime minister.

  13. toad 13

    Ah Lyndon, brilliant!

    Not only does he look like Powell, but like Mosely as well.

    An extraordianry coincidence, Sorry, but don’t think we can find the Franco or Hitler or Mussolini likenesses to Garrett anywhere though.

    But if the cap fits…

  14. BLiP 14

    I reckon he most closely resembles Alf Garnett – showing my age, I guess.

  15. alice 15

    i used ta have a teacher with your name haha

CommentsOpinions

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

FeedsPartyGovtMedia

  • Rigour, PLEASE

    You may have noticed I have been taking my time getting home. You may have wondered if that might have anything to do with our brave little nation being constitutionally and morally abused by this woeful excuse for a government. It does. I have enjoyed being able to turn the ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    1 week ago
  • Making A Difference.

    The Jacinda and Ashley Show: Before the neoliberals could come up with a plausible reason for letting thousands of their fellow citizens perish, the Ardern-led government, backed by the almost forgotten power of an unapologetically interventionist state, was producing changes in the real world – changes that were, very obviously, saving ...
    1 week ago
  • As expected

    Back in May, we learned that National MP David MacLeod had "forgotten" to declare $178,000 in electoral donations. Filing a donation return which is false in any material particular is a crime, and the Electoral Commission has now referred MacLeod to police, since they're the only people who are allowed ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Councils reject National’s racism

    Last month, National passed a racist law requiring local councils to remove their Māori wards, or hold a referendum on them at the 2025 local body election. The government was clearly hoping that, despite all their prior opposition, local authorities would bow down, obey, and vote to disenfranchise Māori. But ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • What austerity actually means and how it pays for $10 billion of tax cuts for the richest 40%

    This is an opinion piece I’ve written after publishing my morning email, which includes many of the details informing it, as have the dozens I’ve written in recent weeks detailing the policies mentioned. This piece is being sent to all subscribers in full immediately and is fully open to the ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    1 week ago
  • Like She Said

    If it could have been like she saidI'd be loving you nowWouldn't have to dream of tonightAs August moves onIf it could have been like she wroteOur truth would be trueWatching the storm disappearYeah, watch it goSong: Jordan Luck.Today in Nick’s Kōrero - things said that should be discussed. From ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    1 week ago
  • Disabled now have to commit crime, be insane or in crisis to access residential care

    Social Development Minister Louise Upston has described the drastic changes as "ripping off the scab to deal with the mess underneath". Photo: Lynn GrievesonMōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Thursday, August 29:A quietly-administered and arbitrary ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    1 week ago
  • Throwback Thursday: The Great Auckland Transport Debate

    Ten years ago this week in August 2014, with an election on the horizon, Greater Auckland (then known as Transportblog) co-hosted a transport-themed debate with the Campaign for Better Transport and Generation Zero – inviting speakers from the political parties to share their transport visions for our city. Matt’s report ...
    Greater AucklandBy Greater Auckland
    1 week ago
  • A Tale of Anonymity and Appreciation

    A beautiful illustration by Substack artist Jean KaiyouYesterday, someone told me that as I comment on the government, it was only right that I should reveal my identity. If I didn’t do so, they said, they would not stay.And my first reaction was surprise, followed by small tinges of reactivity ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    1 week ago
  • “Our people are, frankly, pissed off”

    Even a Labour MP was asking yesterday whether the country’s polytechnics were still a going concern. At the Education Select Committee, Deborah Russell asked Jeremy Morley, a  Te Kupenga Council member, whether the polytechnics, grouped together as Te Kupenga and which lost $37.9 million in 2022 and are forecast to ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    1 week ago
  • Can The Left Assemble A Winning Coalition?

    Voting Together? Collectively, Māori and Pasifika workers, professionals and managers employed by the state, and “progressive” Baby-Boomer superannuitants, possess the electoral clout to defeat the Coalition Government. But will they?TO WIN THE NEXT ELECTION, “The Left”, as we still rather hopefully refer to it, needs three key demographics. Voting together, the ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Climate Adam: Can Coral Reefs survive Climate Change?

    This video includes conclusions of the creator climate scientist Dr. Adam Levy. It is presented to our readers as an informed perspective. Please see video description for references (if any). Coral reefs are in hot water... literally. Climate change is ramping up temperatures, causing increasing bleaching of reefs across the world. ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Health NZ is calling for voluntary redundancies

    After deliberately under-funding Health NZ, and asking Kiwis to personally pray for him, Dr Lester Levy couldn’t help but show his hand today.Health NZ is now calling for voluntary redundancies, and who do you think will leave first? The most qualified or not?But that won’t be all - we all ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    2 weeks ago
  • This Roar is from the Bottom

    Cartoon credit: Emma CookeMaori WardsNo Right Turn reports that only 2 of 19 councils who have made a decision on Māori wards will be getting rid of them.Remember, per the government’s legislation, all councils which want to keep them will be forced now to send it to referendum and bear ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    2 weeks ago
  • The bold plan to save coral reefs

    This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Osha Davidson For 20 years now, Ken Nedimyer has been strapping on his scuba gear and diving into the waters off the Florida coast in a desperate effort to restore coral reefs that have been decimated by climate change ...
    2 weeks ago
  • The Policy and Memory Vortex

    When you start doing research into transport and urban topics and policies, one thing you realise is how messy and chaotic many government websites are. Given that these are (in theory) the most accessible version of the official archive, that’s a challenge. Anyone who has tried to look something up ...
    Greater AucklandBy Connor Sharp
    2 weeks ago
  • Land tax among Labour’s wealth tax options

    Labour is looking at various types and structures of wealth and capital income taxes, including a land tax. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāMōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Wednesday, August 28:Chris Hipkins has confirmed ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • Finding the energy

    Hey Uncle Dave, Can I ask you a question, or are you still crook as a dog?Mac GyverPleased to say I’m upright in Kolkata airport at this hour, thanks very much Mac. Only, I just saw this recipe in Instagram for extra-super-creamy carbonara with triple cheese and lardons and I remembered ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 weeks ago
  • Flightless Bird Update + AMA

    Hi,I just wanted to give you a brief update on the weekly podcast that I make, Flightless Bird, which sees me examining parts of American culture I find strange, amusing, and sometimes terrifying.(If you don’t care about Flightless Bird that is totally fine — I will keep making weird podcast ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    2 weeks ago
  • Ask Me… Anything.
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 weeks ago
  • Fix the Economy, Stupid + What the Godfather of ACT Told ACT To Do

    The Goverment That’s Pushing NZ BackwardsI’ve been musing about a topic and its name is “The Anti-Productivity Coalition.” The degree and scope of contradictory policies by Luxon’s government is quite baffling, and it’s not only the economy.Example: We are strong on crime - so -Let’s build a mega prison that ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    2 weeks ago
  • Jurors are being ripped off

    I had to do a morning of jury service this week, and was fortunate to not get selected for what sounded like an unpleasant and psychologically damaging case. I still have to check whether I have to go back tomorrow (hopefully not), but in the meantime I've begun thinking about ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Starting The Kākā Project of 2026 for 2050 (TKP 26/50)

    Kia ora.The Sunday before last I proposed restarting The Kākā Project work done before the 2023 election as The Kākā Project of 2026 for 2050 (TKP 26/50), aiming to be up and running before the 2025 Local Government elections, and then in a finalised form by the 2026 General Elections. ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • Gordon Campbell On How “fast Track” Steamrolls The Public Good

    New Zealand has a habit of creating official posts – the Overseas Investment Office, the Banking Ombudsman, the Grocery Commissioner – as a sop to public concerns, but where the terms of reference guarantee that such posts won’t interfere unduly with the conduct of business-as-usual. Recently, the Grocery Commissioner gave ...
    WerewolfBy lyndon
    2 weeks ago
  • Learning from our Past

    Our government is in the course – before our very eyes – of declaring that it has lost confidence in, and is accordingly abandoning, the founding concept of New Zealand. It apparently prefers the path trodden by others. The world is not short of countries in which an invading population ...
    Bryan GouldBy Bryan Gould
    2 weeks ago
  • Northwest Busway Next Steps

    Auckland has a long history transport mistakes and one of the big recent ones was to not build a Northwest busway at the same time as we were rebuilding most of the Northwestern motorway a decade ago. One of the few areas where we’re in strong agreement with the government ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Labour revisiting 30/30 fiscal rules. Good.

    Hipkins seems to be rethinking the long-held doctrine that Governments must aim to keep spending and debt below 30% of GDP - a doctrine that has led to a massive intergenerational wealth transfer and a ballooning infrastructure deficit. File Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāMōrena. Long stories short; here’s my ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • Luxon’s first crisis

    Transpower has begun “creative” work on an electricity conservation campaign that it fears could be needed by late January if it does not get substantial water inflows into its hydro lakes. Meanwhile, the Government announced yesterday that it would take a suite of measures to deal with the electricity crisis, ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    2 weeks ago
  • Not a solution

    Aotearoa is currently suffering from one of its regular electricity crises, thanks to systematic underinvestment by the power cartel. Today. driven by business outrage over high power prices, the government announced its response to this, consisting of: a thing which won't lower electricity prices at all (but will ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • China and India are so big. Do my country’s climate actions even matter?

    This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections At a Republican presidential debate in 2023, several candidates articulated a common sentiment about whose climate policies really matter. “If you want to go and really change the environment, then we need to start telling China and India that they have to lower their emissions,” ...
    2 weeks ago
  • What’s Far Is Close & What’s Close Has Already Arrived

    Open to allText within this block will maintain its original spacing when publishedIt’s hard to describe it all. I mean, most people don’t even care. They don’t understand. It’s too opaque and theoretical. But my gut screeches.OPINIONLast week, I realised there’s only 70 + days left until the US Election ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    2 weeks ago
  • Simply not credible

    RNZ has more information this morning on Phillip Morris Minister Casey Costello's mysterious tobacco policy document, and it just gets worse and worse. Costello has consistently claimed to have no idea who authored the document; now she's saying she has no idea how it even got into her office: ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Māori Seabed, For Shore!

    No one owns the waterNo one owns the landsNo one owns the oceansNo one owns the sandsThese are given by our motherThe planet provides for freeOnly at the hands of the greedyDoes the Earth require a fee, eyeah (ooh-ooh-ooh)You hear me singing (ah-ah-ah)Song - Ria Hall.“This is going to blow ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 weeks ago
  • Neurodiversity in urbanism

    This is a guest post by Shaun Baker. It originally appeared on his blog Multimodal Adventures and is shared here by kind permission. A necessary component of creating an inclusive and equitable city is accessibility. Designing our cities with accessibility in mind is important so everyone, particularly our disabled ...
    Greater AucklandBy Guest Post
    2 weeks ago
  • How covenants trumped density in court

    Mōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Monday, August 26:A precedent-setting series of court decisions appear to have weaponised old covenants in suburb development plans to block the push for density from the Beehive. It may ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • Spaceman Barry

    Today’s podcast episode contains distressing descriptions of events. Please don’t listen with your kids in the car. There are signposts along the way where you can switch off or pause if you need to. Please take care when listening. Read more ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    2 weeks ago
  • Fast track to more electricity generation

    The Government is now pulling out all the legislative stops as it attempts to deal with the energy crisis. There is intense pressure on it to provide assurances that there will be sufficient power to keep industry working. POLITIK has learned that one Asian ambassador has warned Ministers that plants ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    2 weeks ago
  • 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #34

    A listing of 30 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Sun, August 18, 2024 thru Sat, August 24, 2024. Story of the week Our Story of the Week is another stab at "connecting the dots," drawing a line between not ...
    2 weeks ago
  • The Price of Power

    Even on the darkest day, you shineEven on the coldest nightYou warm me up through winter′s dayEven through the longest night you shine so brightLyrics of Electric Dream by Shapeshifter.The turning point in my day usually comes an hour or two after I’ve sent out my newsletter. The first reviews ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 weeks ago
  • Other words

    No column today. sorry. I’m sick in a hotel room in Kolkata staying near the bathroom. I have been careful what I eat, but evidently not enough. Meanwhile here are the words I was gladdest to hear this week. Lurching towards constitutional improprietyThe combination of substantive policy issues and legislative methods discussed ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 weeks ago
  • Fact brief – Is decreased cosmic ray activity driving global warming?

    Skeptical Science is partnering with Gigafact to produce fact briefs — bite-sized fact checks of trending claims. This fact brief was written by Sue Bin Park from the Gigafact team in collaboration with John Mason. You can submit claims you think need checking via the tipline. Is decreased cosmic ray activity ...
    2 weeks ago
  • The Ministry of Bag

    It's all swamp and no mosquitoesalong the stripes of pinThe boots have all the vetoesand the bags to put them inIt's all blues and no dinnerat the Ministry of BagThe steaks are getting thinnerthe office is a dragSong - Jack BruceThe Ministry of Bag, or Ministry of Bagging the left, ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 weeks ago
  • Bernard’s Saturday Soliloquy for August 24

    Luxon’s angry lecture of a speech did not go down well with the mayors and councillors at the LGNZ conference. File photo: Getty ImagesMōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty for the week to Saturday, August 24:Christopher ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • Trading Towards a Multipolar World

    .AUKUS is a backward-looking policy. The World needs to move forward. Economists think that the more interconnected countries are by trade and investment, the less likely warfare will occur between them. On many occasions countries have consciously intensified those interconnections as an alternative to war. Examples include the federation of ...
    PunditBy Brian Easton
    2 weeks ago
  • Justice for Alan Hall?

    In June 2022 the Supreme Court quashed Alan hall's conviction for murder. Along the way, they found that the case against him - built on coercive and oppressive interviews, doctored witness statements, and exculpatory evidence concealed from the defence - was so bas that as to be the result of ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • The War of the Rohirrim Trailer

    ‘Tis the season for Tolkien adaptation trailers. No sooner do we get a couple out of Rings of Power, than we get the first trailer out of Warner Brothers’ anime version of Helm Hammerhand: I am definitely looking forward to the film, of course. Anime ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Weirdly hot oceans that are losing their breath, and solar panels in the wrong place

    Long stories short, here’s the top six news items of note in climate news for Aotearoa-NZ this week, and a discussion above between Bernard Hickey and The Kākā’s climate correspondent Cathrine Dyer:Scientists are not entirely sure why sea surface temperatures have been accelerating so quickly over the past year, at ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • The Pied Piper of Hamilton West

    Come on, babeCan't you seeI'm the Pied PiperTrust in meI'm the Pied PiperAnd I'll show you where it's atSong by Crispian St. PetersThis morning a bit of a wrap of the week, or in other words, making light of terrible things to somehow endure them.When you look at this government ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 weeks ago
  • The Hoon around the week to August 23

    The podcast above of the weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar for paying subscribers on Thursday night features co-hosts and talking about the week’s news with:The Kākā’s climate correspondent on the latest science of changing sea temperatures and how most of the solar generation installed is too far north; on ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • Weekly Roundup 23-August-2024

    Greetings and welcome to another Friday wrap-up, featuring all the stories that caught our eye this week in transport, housing, and things that make cities great. Today’s header image shows the Mercury Lane facade of Karanga-ā-Hape station. As always, huge thanks to our supporters. If you enjoy our posts, you’re ...
    Greater AucklandBy Greater Auckland
    2 weeks ago
  • ‘Those spending cuts will go into the bone’

    Concerns over health funding have only worsened since this 2020 rally by primary healthcare workers, with deep cuts planned by the new government flying in the face of pleas to consider health spending as a investment. Photo: Lynn GrievesonMōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • The human impact of Coalition games

    Open to allNew Zealand should be a place of safety and hospitality for those that visit. It’s a beautiful country and many people around the world think highly of Aotearoa and its people.And so it is with great sadness that I learned that members of South Korea’s national ski team ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    2 weeks ago
  • Skeptical Science New Research for Week #34 2024

    Open access notables The ocean losing its breath under the heatwaves, Li et al., Nature Communications: The world’s oceans are under threat from the prevalence of heatwaves caused by climate change. Despite this, there is a lack of understanding regarding their impact on seawater oxygen levels - a crucial element in ...
    2 weeks ago
  • The irreducibly reductive Mr Luxon

    I'm still here! I haven't disappeared down a Mumbai back alley or joined an ashram, I've just had a bunch of work to do, and been riding the rails across India.I am in Varanasi, learning about sacred rituals, watching people wade in the Ganges to wash away their sins, and ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 weeks ago
  • Join us for the weekly Hoon on YouTube Live at 5pm

    Photo by Rafaëlla Waasdorp on UnsplashCome and join us for our weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar with paying subscribers to The Kākā for an hour at 5 pm.Jump on this link on YouTube Livestream for our chat about the week’s news with special guests:5.00 pm - 5.10 pm - Bernard and ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • In Whose Footsteps?

    Who To Follow? Helen Clark is one of the prime movers of Labour’s anti-nuclear policy, and principal author of New Zealand’s independent foreign policy. Andrew Little has come out swinging in favour of AUKUS Pillar 2. Helen Clark negotiated the Free Trade Agreement with China that has kept the New Zealand ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Luxon’s red-headed lecturing of councils is political genius

    Open for allI’ll keep this one short, at least as short I can.Luxon and his government are lying hypocrites. Yesterday Luxon went on a rant at councils, lecturing them like a headmaster admonishing kids who had been naughty and caught skipping school.The reaction from the left has been fairly irate. ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    2 weeks ago
  • The power cartel’s nightmare

    Aotearoa is currently suffering from one of its regular electricity crises, thanks to systematic underinvestment by the power cartel. Meanwhile, in Europe, electricity prices have gone negative: European power markets are experiencing a notable shift as renewable energy sources, particularly wind and solar, become a larger part of the ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Gordon Campbell On The Plague Of The Seymourites

    What a charlatan David Seymour is. Like one of those American Televangelists he so closely resembles, the enemy of bureaucracy is now building his own temple of bureaucracy…and it shall be known as the Ministry of Regulation and many regulations previously passed to benefit the consumer, protect the environment, and ...
    WerewolfBy lyndon
    2 weeks ago
  • Still Fighting It

    Everybody knowsIt hurts to grow upAnd everybody doesIt's so weird to be back hereLet me tell you whatThe years go on andWe're still fighting it, we're still fighting itAnd you're so much like meI'm sorrySong by Ben FoldsGood morning lovely people, and thank you for the many kind birthday wishes. ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 weeks ago
  • The Government Declares Total War on Localism

    In a recent conversation, the person I was talking to outlined the purpose of central and local government in the most simple and clear way I have yet heard: Central government is for nation-building. Local government is for city-building. This was in the context of Auckland, so I would expand ...
    Greater AucklandBy Connor Sharp
    2 weeks ago
  • What should you do to prepare for the climate change storm?

    This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Jeff Masters Like an approaching major hurricane whose outer spiral bands are only just beginning to hit, an approaching climate change storm has begun and will soon grow to ferocious severity — a topic I discussed in detail in my previous post, When ...
    2 weeks ago
  • PM lectures councils he needs help from

    Mōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Thursday, August 22:PM Christopher Luxon appeared to torpedo his own ‘Government of Infrastructure’’s agenda for ‘Going for Housing Growth’ with an angry rant of a speech telling mayors and ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    2 weeks ago
  • My House Is A Haunted House

    Hi,More on my haunted house shortly.First — I hope your week is going okay. Mine has been somewhat chaotic as I’ve been sick as a dog, and there’s been a big, unexpected changeup in my work life which sees my podcast Flightless Bird exiting the Armchair Expert fold. I’m out ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    2 weeks ago
  • Power cuts

    The Government is now staring an energy crisis in the face with very few levers it can pull. The Electricity Authority and Transpower are preparing for the worst and now have a plan for power cuts if the industry can not generate enough power. The immediate problem centres on a ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    2 weeks ago
  • David Seymour’s Ministry of Slush Hides Far Greater Risks

    Synopsis: David Seymour’s Ministry of Regulation aims to be one of a trio of regulation pillars in NZ - alongside RBNZ and Treasury. Seymour’s Regulation scope extends far beyond any Ministerial power, allowing him to set up, define and enforce standards around what is, or isn’t good regulation across government ...
    Mountain TuiBy Mountain Tui
    3 weeks ago
  • Climate Change: National (almost) does the right thing for once

    Back in March, He Pou a Rangi laid down the gauntlet to the government, recommending ETS price and volume settings which would slash the amount of available carbon, in an effort to force polluters to burn their stockpiles. I had low expectations of the government, and expected them to repeat ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    3 weeks ago
  • Media Link: “A View from Afar” on deterrence versus de-escalation.

    In this week’s “A View from Afar” podcast Selwyn Manning and I return to the airwaves to discuss whether deterrence is still a useful concept in international relations and, if so, whether it applies equally to all states. We also … Continue reading ...
    KiwipoliticoBy Pablo
    3 weeks ago
  • Member’s Day

    Today is a Member's Day. Unfortunately its all late stages again. First up is the committee stage of Dan Bidois' Fair Trading (Gift Card Expiry) Amendment Bill. This will be followed by the second readings of Tracey McLellan's Employment Relations (Protection for Kiwisaver Members) Amendment Bill and Deborah Russell's Family ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    3 weeks ago
  • Let’s keep this going

    This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Anthony Lieserowitz This Sunday marks the 10th anniversary of Climate Connections, our national radio program. Launched during a low point in mainstream media coverage of climate change, when only about 15% of Americans believed human-caused global warming was an urgent threat, the program was ...
    3 weeks ago
  • An electricity crisis after a lost decade

    Another mill is closing, prompted by ballooning power prices over July, while gentailers made a combined $512.4 million in profits in the six weeks since July 1. Photo: Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāMōrena. Long stories short; here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    3 weeks ago
  • Party Loyalty

    No questions, only orders and flightOnly flightSong by Roger Waters.Toeing the line is quite important in politics, not questioning too much. There might be an occasional opportunity for an MP to cast a vote according to their conscience, on a social issue, but by and large a caucus is expected ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    3 weeks ago
  • Speak up on the Emission Reduction Plan – by Sunday 25 August

    The government wants to know what you think about its Emissions Reduction Plan for the years 2026-2030, the critical second half of this critical decade for climate action. The second emissions reduction plan (ERP2) will outline the actions that we intend to take to reduce emissions in New Zealand during ...
    Greater AucklandBy Greater Auckland
    3 weeks ago
  • Making Kiwibank fly – with (or without) Winston

    The Government’s proposal to turn Kiwibank into a fully competitive trading bank looks certain to go ahead despite NZ First’s unwillingness yesterday to express support. Instead, it is entirely possible that Labour might make the proposal a bipartisan one. However, there is a lot of water to go under the ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    3 weeks ago
  • Not getting the message

    Yesterday almost all political parties attended the Koroneihana at Tūrangawaewae, and Chris Luxon and Shane Jones took the opportunity to make it crystal clear that the government's racist, divisive, Tiriti-breaching Treaty "Principles" Bill has no future. Which is good, but if they're not going to vote for it at second ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    3 weeks ago

  • PM meets Malaysian Prime Minister Anwar Ibrahim

    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and his Malaysian counterpart, Prime Minister Anwar Ibrahim, have today released a Joint Statement emphasising both countries’ commitment to the bilateral Strategic Partnership. The Joint Statement was released at the conclusion of a meeting during the Prime Minister’s first official visit to Malaysia, with both leaders ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • ‘Open banking’ and ‘open electricity’ a step closer

    Greater competition and lower prices for Kiwi consumers are a step closer today as consultation begins on ‘open banking’ and ‘open electricity’ Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly and Energy Minister Simeon Brown say. “Every New Zealander relies on banking and electricity – these are foundational services for our ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Turning rubber into resources

    New Zealand’s first national tyre recycling scheme is now fully operational with free collections starting today, says Environment Minister Penny Simmonds. “The first priority product stewardship scheme for end-of-life tyres marks a significant step toward addressing a long-standing issue for our country,” Ms Simmonds says. “Every year, New Zealand imports ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 days ago
  • New Zealand and Canada strengthen emergency management cooperation

    An agreement signed on Thursday between New Zealand’s National Emergency Management Agency (NEMA) and Public Safety Canada will strengthen international cooperation on emergency management matters says Emergency Management and Recovery Minister, Mark Mitchell.  “With the frequency and severity of emergencies increasing globally, it’s important, now more than ever, that countries ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • 110km/h speed limit proposed from Orewa to Warkworth

    Proposed speed limit increases of 110km/h on State Highway 1 from Orewa to Warkworth will mean faster journey times for Kiwis travelling between Auckland and Northland and has been welcomed by Transport Minister Simeon Brown.  “Boosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of the Government’s plan to rebuild the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • He poroporoaki ki a Kīngi Tuheitia Pootatau Te Wherowhero VII

    Whekuwheku ana te whenua i te tāhekenga o roimata, haehae ana te manawa i te ngau o te aroha, hotuhotu ana te ngākau i te kaponga ōu e te kupenga a Taramainuku. Kei konei mātou, kua taka a roto i te rongotanga ake i te hinganga ōu. Ka tangihia tonutia ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Waikato Regional Summit postponed

    A Waikato Regional Growth Summit planned for next Tuesday in Hamilton has been postponed following the passing of Kiingi Tuuheitia Pootatau Te Wherowhero VII, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones says. “I join the many voices already that have expressed sorrow at this news and offer my condolences and aroha to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Sport & Rec Minister to attend Paralympics

    Sport & Recreation Minister Chris Bishop will travel to Paris to support the New Zealand Paralympic Team during the 2024 Paralympic Games – the first time a New Zealand Sport & Recreation Minister has ever attended a Paralympics. “The Paralympic Games are the third-largest sporting event in the world and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Making it easier to verify your identity online

    Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden says the Government is making it easier to verify your identity online by rolling out RealMe Identity Verification Service [RealMe] access to an additional seven private sector organisations. “The Government is now expanding this service to further organisations including financial service companies and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New approach to mental health calls welcomed

    Mental Health Minister Matt Doocey and Police Minister Mark Mitchell have welcomed the announcement by Health NZ and NZ Police on their transition to a stronger mental health-led response for those requiring crisis mental health support. Health NZ and NZ Police have announced that from November 2024 agencies will streamline ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Government’s condolences on passing of Kīngi Tūheitia Pootatau Te Wherowhero VII

    Acting Prime Minister Winston Peters has expressed the Government’s condolences on the passing of Kīngi Tūheitia Pootatau Te Wherowhero VII.   “It is with great sadness that we learn of the passing of the King, and we express sympathies and prayers to the Kingitanga family and Tainui people.   “Kīngi ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Bill strengthening Firearm Prohibition Orders passes

    An important milestone in the Coalition Government’s commitment to restoring law and order was reached with the passing of the Firearms Prohibition Orders Legislation Amendment Bill today, Associate Justice Minister Nicole McKee says.   “The Firearms Prohibition Orders Legislation Amendment Bill was part of this Government’s 100-day plan and committed ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Bill to strengthen the economy passes first reading

    The Government continues to introduce measures that will strengthen the economy and ensure New Zealand businesses and individuals have a more secure future, Revenue Minister Simon Watts says. “The Taxation (Annual Rates for 2024-25, Emergency Response, and Remedial Measures) Bill, which passed its first reading today, proposes several measures aimed ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Speech to Building Nations 2024 – Modernising New Zealand’s PPP Model

    INTRODUCTION What an honour to be running the anchor leg of this incredible conference, and to be able to update you on some of the work I’ve had the privilege of doing across two of the best portfolios for a civil engineer – Infrastructure and RMA Reform.  New Zealand’s infrastructure ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Victims to benefit from Remote Participation Bill

    Court participants, particularly victims, will benefit from the passing of a bill today that will enable greater use of audio and audiovisual technology in court proceedings, Courts Minister Nicole McKee says.   The Courts (Remote Participation) Amendment Bill which makes targeted amendments to the Courts (Remote Participation) Act 2010 and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Business confidence rises under new economic management

    Today’s ANZ Business Outlook shows businesses are feeling a whole lot better about the future, Minister of Finance Nicola Willis says. “It’s so pleasing to see business confidence is the highest in a decade, and firms’ outlook for their own activity, looking 12 months into the future, is the highest ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Minister appoints new chair and members to Water Services Authority

    Minister of Local Government Simeon Brown has announced new appointments to the Board of the Water Services Authority – Taumata Arowai (the Authority), including a new chair, and has reappointed two members of the Authority’s Māori Advisory Group for a further three-year term. Former Watercare chief executive Raveen Jaduram is ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Refreshed health research to drive better outcomes

    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says updated guidance provided to the Health Research Council (HRC) means future projects will have an increased focus on Government priorities and improved health for New Zealanders when being considered for funding. The refreshed guidance for applicants is included in the two HRC funding opportunities ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Government to update parking penalties

    The Government will be cracking down on people who misuse car parks for disabled people, ensuring towage fees do not leave tow-truck operators out of pocket, and adjusting parking fines for inflation, Disability Issues Minister Louise Upston and Transport Minister Simeon Brown say.  “Increasing penalties for people who misuse mobility ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New board appointments for RNZ & TVNZ

    Media and Communications Minister Paul Goldsmith is announcing new appointments to the RNZ and TVNZ Boards. “I am delighted to appoint Brent Impey, Gracie MacKinlay and Mads Moller to the RNZ Board, and John Fellet to the TVNZ Board,” says Mr Goldsmith. “These appointments will bring new experience and a ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Revenue Action Plan to support delivering infrastructure sooner

    The Government has announced a Revenue Action Plan to enable a clear infrastructure pipeline that delivers the critical transport infrastructure our country needs sooner, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “Delivering infrastructure to increase productivity and economic growth is a key priority for the Government. With New Zealand facing a prolonged ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New Zealand, China hold high-level climate change talks

    Chinese Minister of Ecology and Environment, Huang Runqiu is departing New Zealand today after the Fifth Ministerial Climate Change Dialogue between New Zealand and China, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. “China is an important climate partner for New Zealand, and vital to global efforts to reduce the impacts of ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Mental health service to support over 130 schools

    Minister for Mental Health Matt Doocey says the rollout of mental health support to primary and intermediate school pupils in Hawke’s Bay and Tairawhiti regions will continue. “The Government has committed sustainable funding to the phased rollout of Mana Ake, which will grow to $3.7 million a year by 2026/27. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Mineral stocktake shows opportunities for growth

    A new report on New Zealand’s mineral endowment identifies prospects for development, enabling a strategic and considered approach to growing the country’s resources sector, Resources Minister Shane Jones says.  The report, done by GNS Science as part of the draft Minerals Strategy for New Zealand, brings together extensive research, geological, geochemical ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Next steps to clean-up the East Coast

    Forestry Minister Todd McClay today announced the establishment of the ‘Tairāwhiti Forestry Action Group’ to expedite wood clean-up in Tairāwhiti and help implement best practice for forestry.    “This is an important next step to ensure the on-going clean-up of wood and mitigation of future risk across the Tairāwhiti region,” ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Scope of Significant Natural Areas review revealed

    The Government has decided the scope of a review that will consider how significant natural areas (SNAs) should be identified, assessed and managed, Associate Environment Minister Andrew Hoggard announced today. In May, the Government introduced a Bill that proposes to suspend requirements for councils to identify new SNAs to provide ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • New radio network for first responders

    The Coalition Government today welcomed the launch of a new national radio network that will provide emergency responders with the modern, resilient, secure radio communications technology they need, says Emergency Management and Recovery Minister, Mark Mitchell and Internal Affairs Minister, Brooke van Velden.  The first component of the Public Safety ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Chiefs of Navy, Army and Air Force appointed

    Defence Minister Judith Collins today announced Commodore Garin Golding, Brigadier Rose King and Air Vice-Marshal Darryn Webb as the chiefs of the Navy, Army and Air Force respectively.  “These accomplished leaders are the New Zealand Defence Force’s (NZDF) most senior officers in their service, bringing a wealth of experience and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Speech to Building Nations 2024

    Introduction and acknowledgements Good morning, everyone. I am very excited to see so many people here ready to improve the way New Zealand delivers infrastructure. Can I say a quick thank you to Nick and the team at Infrastructure New Zealand for organising this great conference, as well as the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • National Infrastructure Plan to provide a 30-year roadmap

    The 30-year National Infrastructure Plan will ensure greater stability of infrastructure priorities to help New Zealand plan for, fund and deliver important projects, Infrastructure Minister Chris Bishop says.  “National campaigned on developing a 30-year national infrastructure plan, and I am pleased to outline our progress toward delivering it in Government. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • 1 December start for National Infrastructure Agency

    The Government’s new National Infrastructure Agency will be established this year, unlocking access to more capital for infrastructure and strengthening the Government’s private finance and commercial capability, Infrastructure Minister Chris Bishop says.  “From 1 December, Crown Infrastructure Partners (CIP) will be repurposed to be the new National Infrastructure Agency (NIA).” ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • New Zealand, Tonga renew Partnership

    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Tongan Prime Minister Hu’akavameiliku met today in the margins of the 53rd Pacific Islands Forum Leaders meeting in Tonga. “New Zealand and Tonga have a close, long-standing relationship, underpinned by strong people-to-people ties, our shared love of sport, and our commitment to a safe and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Action plan to get more people into employment

    Supporting more people into work so they can lead happier, healthier, and more productive lives is the vision at the heart of the Government’s new Employment Action Plan.  “Our economy is stronger when more people are in work and a well-performing labour market is critical for giving New Zealanders more ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Red tape cut for marine farm consents

    The aquaculture industry, exports and the economy, will benefit from the passing of a bill today that will extend existing coastal permits for marine farms by 20 years, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. The Resource Management (Extended Duration of Coastal Permits for Marine Farms) Amendment Bill has passed ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Local Water Done Well bill passes

    Parliament’s passing of legislation setting out the Government’s Local Water Done Well preliminary arrangements for new water services has been welcomed by Local Government Minister Simeon Brown.  “Councils and voters resoundingly rejected Labour’s expensive and bureaucratic Three Waters, which wasted $1.2 billion on stripping local communities’ control of water assets, while ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Fishing levies cut to provide industry relief

    Levies paid by the fishing industry have been cut to help support the sector to increase its value to New Zealand through exports and jobs, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. The industry pays an annual Fisheries and Conservation Services Levy to the Government to cover a range of ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • First 110km/h speed limit proposed for South Island

    Proposed speed limit increases to 110km/h on State Highway 1/76 Christchurch Southern Motorway to Rolleston will mean faster journey times for Kiwis travelling in and out of Christchurch from the south and has been welcomed by Transport Minister Simeon Brown. “Boosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Speech to the Aviation Industry Association Conference

    Introduction  Good morning.  Thank you, Simon, for that warm introduction, and thank you to the Aviation Industry Association for inviting me to speak today at your annual conference.I’d like to begin by acknowledging Ashok Poduval, President of the Aviation Industry Association, and Simon Wallace, the Association’s Chief Executive. The work you ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • A ‘Beneficiaries-First’ approach to employment

    New targets will see a greater proportion of MSD’s spending on employment programmes go towards supporting people on Jobseeker benefits, rather than non-beneficiaries. Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston has today outlined the Government’s employment investment framework, which will guide how the $1.1 billion available for MSD’s employment support ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago
  • Phase 2 of the Royal Commission of Inquiry into COVID-19 Lessons

    Internal Affairs Minister Brooke van Velden says the Government has finalised the detailed terms of reference for Phase 2 of the Royal Commission of Inquiry into COVID-19 Lessons. “These terms of reference reflect the decision taken by the Government in June to establish Phase 2 of the Royal Commission. Both the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago

Page generated in The Standard by Wordpress at 2024-09-07T23:57:45+00:00