A Friend first, and a Boss second, probably an Entertainer third.

Written By: - Date published: 1:56 pm, April 26th, 2015 - 44 comments
Categories: Abuse of power, class war, john key, leadership, same old national, workers' rights, you couldn't make this shit up - Tags: , ,

“I’m a friendly guy that likes to interact with the public. I do like to have a bit of a laugh and I’m probably the most casual Prime Minister New Zealand has had.”  John Key. Q+A.

The most casual Prime Minister New Zealand has had. And, boy, doesn’t it show.

Helen Clark had such attention to detail she managed to run budget surpluses, lower unemployment and lift wages. But, hey, chillax, peeps! John’s got this. The good news is that Andrew Little does actually know what a hard day’s work entails, and has a focus on getting the job done. New Zealand deserves nothing less.

Not satisfied with being an international laughing stock, Key really thinks that admitting being a slacker is going to endear him to the folks back home, who are all looking at him in an entirely new light since Wednesday’s revelations. Dumb and dumber.

“Key said his casual approach had both advantages and disadvantages.”

Disadvantages may include sexual harassment and general inappropriate touching of females. (ht Idlegus!)

“I have to take total responsibility for that. I shouldn’t have done the things I have done.”

Sweet. Then you’ll be resigning as soon as you get back? Nah, thought not.

“I think it’s the opposite to what some people might think that there’s a power imbalance”

Leave John Key alone! He’s the real victim here! Of course if it literally was the opposite, the young women being bullied would have had power over John Key, his wife, his entourage and his bodyguards. That doesn’t sound an entirely credible scenario to me.

A responsible leader, someone who isn’t proud to be casual about their job, would resign. But I hope Key doesn’t quit. I really, really don’t want him to go just yet. It’s going to be too much fun watching National’s only asset being the butt of jokes for the next two years. No, much better that we wait while the various investigations into his bizarre assaults play out. Or how ever long it is before Judith Collins calls an end to the madness. Popcorn, ahoy!

The most casual Prime Minister New Zealand has had.

Thanks, John, we now have your epitaph.

David Brent couldn’t have said it better. Fact!

 

 

 

 

 

44 comments on “A Friend first, and a Boss second, probably an Entertainer third.”

  1. Nick 1

    Wasn’t me, I forget, ….. Now…. most casual, the latest spin. The sad part is enough people buy it.

  2. felix 2

    Well said TRP.

    I think next time we should have a Prime Minister who takes the job seriously.

    • tracey 2.1

      is he on a casual contract? ah no, thats right… we pay him nearly 500k per annum plus expenses and perks.

  3. Incognito 3

    Casual Key is casual with facts, with history, with remembering, with people’s rights & feelings, with people’s dignity. In fact, he is casual about being casual. What he’s trying to convey is that he’s “relaxed and comfortable” and doesn’t give a rat’s arse about anybody or anything else but himself. Casual Key has spoken the truth!

  4. Hateatea 4

    May it not be too long before CasualKey is a Casualty! (Of his own casualness)

  5. Brendan 5

    This one’s a goodie.

    • cogito 5.1

      LOL. The really funny thing is that Key probably wouldn’t even recognise himself!

      • miravox 5.1.1

        I didn’t realise “The Office” was a training video.

        I casually learn something everyday – Fact.

        • seeker 5.1.1.1

          Don’t know which made me laugh more Brendan’s so on the nail link or your very clever comment Miravox. One totally compliments the other. Still laughing, thanks both.

  6. idlegus 6

    from one entertainer to another, john campbell just tweeted a herald online article where they mistakenly put campbells name instead of john key (talking about the anzac vist, ‘Among the attendees are Prime Minsister John Campbell & his Aussie counterpart…’ , wtf is going on over at the herald!

    the tweet here https://twitter.com/CampbellLiveNZ/status/592176903894663169/photo/1

  7. Murray Rawshark 7

    I’d actually like him to quit. I think the regime would fall to bits shortly after and we could end up with a new government. To satisfy any urges for comedic fun, I can always watch reruns of Monty Python.

  8. One Anonymous Bloke 8

    It’s just another lie.

    Key’s attention to semantic detail is legendary. His throw-away remarks have small-print. He’s paying attention, and if he’s having fun, it’s quite literally at our expense.

  9. swordfish 9

    Yeah, Key dismissing it all as “hi-jinks”, “horsing around”, “harmless fun” and a bit of “Banter”…

    Reminds me very much of
    David Brent (to “The Swindon lot”, after hearing from Gareth that they call him ‘Bluto’): “Hello, sorry everybody, um, look, we are one big happy family here, yeah ? Now, I’ve been trying to welcome you new guys…you know I didn’t want you here but you’re here now so, y’know, (grudgingly) ‘well done’, welcome…but if there’s one thing I don’t like it’s nicknames, yeah ? Because nicknames are bad names, yeah ? They’re not helpful, yeah ? They can be very hurtful, yeah ?…but not to me, it’s like water off a duck’s back, but…”

    One of the old (Slough) lot (interrupting): “Didn’t you use to call Malcolm “Kojak” ?”

    Brent: “Awwww, that was affectionate !!! You know, he was a great detective and a fine actor.”

  10. ropata 10

    Key is the master of pratfalls and making NZ a laughingstock of the world.

    The stage dive and broken arm
    The catwalk mincing
    The “gay red top” quip on talkback radio
    The RWC triple handshake
    The embarrassing Letterman appearance
    The Rugby News cover photo in AB gear
    The beer swilling bbq with Prince Harry
    The ponytail pulling fetish
    The insult to David Beckham

    And more seriously

    The joking around and insults in the House of Parliament
    The chickenshit no-shows when invited to face Kim Hill or John Campbell
    The persecution of Nicky Hager and Bradley Ambrose (if Hager lied why not sue?)
    The avoidance of funerals in favour of sports games
    The dismissal of Pulitzer winning journo Glenn Greenwald as a hack
    All the other stuff in BLiP’s list

    This guy does not represent New Zealand in any way that I recognise.

    • seeker 10.1

      Worst was his cowering and then throat slashing gesture at the opposition benches
      when there was a commotion in the public gallery in Parliament. What a ‘gutsy’ PM. What a leader.

    • Rosie 10.2

      + a gazillion ropata.

      Plus, I agree with Murray and Mary that Key has to resign.

      If the systematic abuse, harassment and bullying of a woman who is quite unequal in her power compared to his, is NOT considered unacceptable behaviour for a PM, then what is?

      If we turn a blind eye to our PM’s unwelcome and persistent actions of physical and psychological assault then we have given up any kind of morality or standards.

      Key makes me sick anyway but to have an abuser as a PM is the final straw. I don’t see how NZers can live with that, or tolerate it.

      Clearly he has his own personal issues which he needs to address, that’s his business, but first off he needs to resign, to begin to make amends for his behaviour.

      If there is a public call for his resignation then I would join that chorus.

  11. bernard 11

    Key can`t blame `The Office` or someone else this time

    k

    • Alpha z 11.1

      (Key can`t blame `The Office` or someone else this time)
      nah. not office. only the orifice

  12. mary_a 12

    No way do I want Key to remain in power any longer than necessary. The sooner he’s gone the better and minus his much anticipated knighthood, which could be a pipe dream for him, if complaints about his creepy behaviour are laid! If he’s investigated, he will have no option but to step down!

    Oh bring it on!

  13. ropata 13

    Top NZ trend on Twitter right now … #CasualJohn

  14. SMILIN 14

    Well Key you can afford to be casual about your job the rest of us are working full time to pay for it you delinquent twerp how would you like imagine being shot for dereliction of duty like a 100 yrs ago and get a feel of a bit of horse hair as well might sober you up

  15. ropata 15

    JOHN TROUBLE? Well #TEAMKEY have the ideal party alternative. Quick and discrete, "CASUAL JOHN" 谢谢. #CasualJohn pic.twitter.com/06eToWdO2r— TEAMKEY (@TEAMKEY888) April 26, 2015

  16. ropata 16

    Let's just casually dismiss these petitions, the HRC, the Privacy Commission, Law Society, Pulitzer journos, all just "henchmen" #CasualJohn— Alan (@alans_world) April 26, 2015

  17. ropata 17

    Casually denying the findings of "The Gwyn Report" that his Office was culpable regarding the Goff OIA being given to Slater. #CasualJohn— Foxy Lusty-Grover (@FoxyLustyGrover) April 26, 2015

  18. ropata 18

    @FoxyLustyGrover #CasualJohn All Black insider, don't forget. pic.twitter.com/GyZOexlUYJ— Arch Rival (@ArchieDaRival) April 26, 2015

  19. ropata 19

    Casually admitting, on National Radio, that he breaks the OIA whenever it is in his interests to do so. #CasualJohn— Felix Geiringer (@BarristerNZ) April 26, 2015

  20. ropata 20

    Im a pretty casual guy says #CasualJohn , somehow video #planetkey mocking John Key is banned— Ross (@RossGrahamnz) April 26, 2015

  21. ropata 21

    I'm pretty casual about the whole NO means NO thing hence why I kept pulling the waitresses hair #CasualJohn— A Storm is Coming! (@ArbyHyde) April 26, 2015

  22. freedom 22

    whoever thought “casual” was going to send the right message
    are tonight updating their resumes

  23. TheContrarian 23

    I wouldn’t take casual to mean he’s a slacker. The office of PM requires one work fucking hard and I have no doubt Key works hard. In his not holding the work load and position with the gravitas it demands, being casual about it – all that in spades.

    • tracey 23.1

      since he gave up one of his portfolios you mean?

      or foubd time to drop his golf handicap from low 20s to nearly 10?

  24. RedLogix 24

    Key does himself a disservice – there’s nothing causal about managing to halve your golf handicap while doing the Prime Minister’s job at the same time.

    That’s bloody Superman territory! (/sarc)

  25. Melanie Scott 25

    “Casual” is a carefully contrived mannerism in John Key’s case. He does work hard at it so as to hide the ugly face of corporate greed. He works hard for his mates both in NZ and overseas, especially in the context of fending off demands for control on foreign ownership of NZ agricultural land and houses in Auckland. He works hard at batting away calls for the introduction of Capital Gains taxes and stamp duty. The so-called casualness is a carefully contrived PR stance, designed to fool the average voter into thinking he, John Key is an average guy, an average NZ-er; which could not be further from the truth.
    A true example of sponteneity and genuine casualness, would be David Lange, who effortlessly combined his “casualness” with a brilliant wit and a warm, humane nature.

  26. david 26

    Poor man. The trouble is the people just don’t understand. That the politicians just want to have fun. They got voted in and they now deserve to.

    • ropata 26.1

      When you’re the smiling assassin of Wall St, with a whole country as your plaything, what is one insignificant pony tail and a few tears from some girl in a cafe?

      (rhetorical device — not my usual terminology!)

  27. linda 27

    accept it was serial ponytail and ponytail with a minor way to creepy!

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  • Australia to Pacific: “Fuck you, you can all drown”
    World leaders are meeting in New York in two weeks for the 2019 Climate Action Summit, where they are expected to announce new and more ambitious targets to stop the world from burning. But the Australian Prime Minister won't be there, despite being in the USA at the time:Scott Morrison ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Implausible ignorance
    Labour Party president Nigel Haworth resigned yesterday over the party's sexual assault scandal. But while that's good news, its unlikely to take away the stench of a coverup. Because according to Paula Bennett in Parliament yesterday, pretty much everyone in the Prime Minister's office was involved as well:I have been ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Labour’s Fatal Flaw.
     Two-Faced? Labour insiders' commitment to the neoliberal status quo puts them at odds with their party’s membership; its trade union affiliates; and a majority of Labour voters, but this only serves to strengthen the perception they have of themselves as a special elite. Among the lesser breeds, they’ll talk up a ...
    1 week ago
  • Ten reasons the Tories do NOT want an election
    There has been a lot of talk about Boris Johnson wanting an election, and he has blustered with great gusto about 'chicken' Jeremy Corbyn refusing one, but I think there are many reasons why he is secretly glad he has been refused the opportunity:The Tories are an utter rabble,tearing themselves ...
    1 week ago
  • Prorogation Illegal, rule Scottish judges
    Scottish appeal court judges have declared that Boris Johnson’s decision to suspend parliament in the run-up to the October Brexit deadline is unlawful. The three judges, chaired by Lord Carloway, Scotland’s most senior judge, overturned an earlier ruling that the courts did not have the powers to interfere in the prime ...
    1 week ago
  • Let me explain what I meant by Everyday New Zealanders
    By Simon Bridges. The following is a press release from the office of Simon Bridges, leader of The National Party. Key ora, New Zealand. Happy Maori Language Week. Look, I’m writing to you today because I want to clear something up. There’s been a lot of kerfuffle around some things ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    1 week ago
  • Yes, the SIS is subject to the Public Records Act
    I understand there's some stuff going round about how the SIS "was removed from the list of public offices covered by the Public Records Act in 2017". The context of course being their records derived from US torture, which will be disposed of or sealed. The good news is that ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • An evidence-based discussion of the Canadian fluoride/IQ study
    Dr. Christopher Labos and Jonathan Jarry discuss the recent Canadian fluoride/IQ research. They provide an expert analysis of the paper and its problems. Click on image to go to podcast. The critical debate about the recent ...
    1 week ago
  • Climate Change: Australia in denial
    Australia is burning down again, and meanwhile its natural disaster minister is denying climate change:Australia’s minister responsible for drought and natural disasters, David Littleproud, has said that he doesn’t “know if climate change is manmade”. Clarifying earlier comments that the question is “irrelevant” when considering the Coalition government’s response to ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Philippines activist speaking on the Duterte tyranny
    Auckland Philippines Solidarity is excited to host Professor Judy Taguiwalo for a speaking tour of NZ in September. She is a well-known activist in the Philippines and was a political prisoner under the Marcos dictatorship. Professor Taguiwalo briefly served as a Cabinet member under President Duterte but was forced from ...
    RedlineBy Daphna
    1 week ago
  • Disgust
    I have no special insights to offer on the Labour sexual assault coverup. All I have is disgust. Disgust that an organisation could fail its people so badly. Disgust that they punished the victims rather than the perpetrator. Disgust that its party hacks are apparently blaming the victims for demanding ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Speak Up for Women calls out Greens’ censorship
    This open letter to the Green Party was penned after an opinion piece by Jill Abigail, a feminist and founding member of the party, was censored by the Greens’ leadership. (Redline has reprinted her article here).The intolerance of the Green Party leaders and their acceptance of the misogyny of gender ...
    RedlineBy Daphna
    1 week ago
  • Member’s Day: End of Life Choice, part 3
    Today is a Member's day, and David Seymour's End of Life Choice Bill continues its slow crawl through its committee stage. They're spending the whole day on it today, though the first hour is likely to be spent on voting left over from last time. After that they'll move on ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Flight to Los Angeles turned back after passengers decide they don’t want to go anymore
    An ambitious plan to fly to Los Angeles petered out into a brief sight-seeing trip and a desire to return home and get some sleep before work tomorrow. Air New Zealand has confirmed a flight to Los Angeles last night was turned back about a quarter of the way into ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    1 week ago
  • Indigenous Futures: defuturing and futuring – an analytical framework for policy development?
    There appears to be consensus – by omission – that the concept of indigenous futures should be accepted at face value. So I scavenged the internet to see if I could locate an academic descriptor or a framework around how we think about it as a concept, and whether it ...
    EllipsisterBy Ellipsister
    2 weeks ago
  • Cadbury rumoured to be releasing the Pineapple Trump
    Here’s another novelty chocolate to shove in your gob, New Zealand Cadbury could be seeking to make itself great again with a rumoured new release: Pineapple Trumps, a spin on its classic chocolate-encased pineapple treat and do-it-yourself tooth remover. The global confectionery manufacturer and bumbling “before” character in an infomercial, ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    2 weeks ago
  • The coming resource war.
    During my time in the Pentagon I had the privilege of sitting down with military leaders and defence and security officials from a variety of Latin American nations. Sometimes I was present as a subordinate assistant to a senior US defence department official, sometimes as part of a delegation that ...
    KiwipoliticoBy Pablo
    2 weeks ago
  • Māori Language Week with The Civilian
    Kia ora, Aotearoa. It’s that magical time of year. Te Wiki o te Reo Māori. In English, the week that frightens talk radio. As you probably know by now, all your favourite media outlets are participating, some more successfully than others. Stuff has changed its name to Puna for the ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    2 weeks ago
  • Will Horizons act on climate change?
    Local body elections are coming up next month. And it looks like all Palmerston North candidates for Horizons (the Manawatu-Whanganui Regional Council) want to take action on climate change:Climate change is set to be a key issue in Palmerston North for the next three years if those wanting to get ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • BORA reform is stalled
    Eighteen months ago, the government promised to strengthen the Bill of Rights Act, by explicitly affirming the power of the courts to issue declarations of inconsistency and requiring Parliament to formally respond to them. So how's that going? I was curious, so I asked for all advice about the proposal. ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Corbyn and Brexit
    As the Brexit saga staggers on, the focus is naturally enough on the Prime Minister and his attempts to achieve Brexit “do or die”. But the role played by the Leader of the Opposition is of almost equal interest and complexity. The first problem for Jeremy Corbyn is that he ...
    Bryan GouldBy Bryan Gould
    2 weeks ago
  • A ditch for him to die in
    Last week, English Prime Minister Boris Johnson boldly declared that he would rather die be dead in a ditch than delay Brexit. Unfortunately for him, the UK parliament accepted the challenge, and promptly dug one for him. The "rebellion bill" requires him to ask for and secure yet another temporary ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Warning! Warning! Danger Jacinda Ardern! Danger Marama Davidson! Warning!
    Lost In Political Space: The most important takeaway from this latest Labour sexual assault scandal, which (if I may paraphrase Nixon’s White House counsel’s, John Dean’s, infamous description of Watergate) is “growing like a cancer” on the premiership, is the Labour Party organisation’s extraordinary professional paralysis in the face of ...
    2 weeks ago

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