Caption Contest

Written By: - Date published: 3:01 pm, July 5th, 2011 - 112 comments
Categories: act, caption contest, don brash - Tags:

112 comments on “Caption Contest”

  1. millhouse 1

    “Braaains…..”

  2. Andy-Roo 2

    I know it looks like I have not shaved, but that is really just the blood of my victims…

  3. bryce 3

    I’m saying this honestly, your children will be safe staying over with me

  4. bryce 4

    Frozen 5000 year old vampire thaws, integrates into society.

  5. Tel 5

    John Key snapped by clever Apple Ap called iReal which reveals the actual politician beneath the public facade

  6. Would you like to see some puppies?

  7. Well, you know?…. He does have honest blue eyes….

  8. Now, where did I leave my white robes and pointy hate, I’ve got crucifix’s to burn.

  9. Janice 9

    I’m your nice Uncle Don and I want you to give me all your money and assets so my poor friends don’t starve. P.S. did it have to be such a big scary photo?

  10. Would you buy a used car from this man?

  11. Colonial Viper 11

    “Those garlic cloves are not going to help you get equal pay young woman, and neither will I”

  12. Colonial Viper 12

    “I don’t think my good friend Rodney Hide is feeling at all disappointed or betrayed”

  13. Zorr 13

    Don Brash as seen by John Key…

  14. g_man 14

    You know something? On Kiwiblog, Farrar runs “Caption Contests” and always says “Comments should be amusing, not nasty”.

    Here, you have comments like “Now, where did I leave my white robes and pointy hate, I’ve got crucifix’s to burn”.

    I’m struggling to understand why people are so nasty here …

    • Colonial Viper 14.1

      And we’re going to get much nastier as the year goes on.

      Even so, we won’t break into your PC and distribute your personal and political information like some other people might.

      • sweetd 14.1.1

        There was no breaking in. The admin left the door unlocked and open encouraging anyone to go have look.

        • Lanthanide 14.1.1.1

          Show us where Labour “encouraged” anyone to download the files.

          • felix 14.1.1.1.1

            I suppose if you’re a crook, everything looks like a crime waiting to happen, eh?

            • Akldnut 14.1.1.1.1.1

              sweetd you fucking idiot – it wasn’t just a look there was theft of personal data which was passed around, just because I leave my front door or open or unlocked doesn’t mean some wanker can come in and help himself to any of my personal information or property then spread it around the community.

              If this was done to a bank the internet theft rules would apply and whoever did it would be facing a cyber crime charge.

              You wouldn’t like it if you personal financial information was plastered all over the internet

    • Blighty 14.2

      another right whiner.

      dry your little eyes, g_man. Brash has had worse things said about him than anything here. And that was just by the voices in his head.

    • lprent 14.3

      It could have something to do with Owera…

      Unlike many of the myth making denizens at the sewer we have clear recollections of history. So we tell it as it is. I’m sad that you consider that reality is nasty – but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.

      IMHO: No man in NZ public life deserves the white pointy hat characterization as much as Brash does.

    • Carol 14.4

      I’m struggling to understand why people are so nasty here …

      Unlike Blue @3.59pm?

    • Pascal's bookie 14.5

      g_man, you pick a month, I’ll pick a week. You can then choose the open mike thread from here from that week that you think is the nastiest, and I’ll pick the general debate thread from KB. We then play ‘find the wankers’.

      Deal? We’ll have to do it on thurs, coz I’m busy with familial stuff over the next coupla days, but I think it would be a fascinating wee exercise.

    • felix 14.6

      You guys need to get with the kiwiblog reich right school of race relations.

      The new rule is it’s fine to be a racist, but it’s a hanging matter to call someone a racist. Especially if they are a racist, cos it’s like racism. Against racists.

    • Ianupnorth 14.7

      I said that, brash said the Orewa address; mine is on a leftist blog, his was on the 6 O’Clock news. Slight difference – I will continue to be nasty to the affluent until such time as they actually do something constructive to help the poor!
       

    • Reality Bytes 14.8

      So Kiwiblog is supposed to be the fucking template and rules of Internet etiquette now?

      lol whatever mate.

  15. Blue 15

    Helen Clarke goes without make-up, millions terrified. Ginger-headed former MP’s jump for joy.

    • Blighty 15.1

      Blue grasps at out of date misogynist straws, slips

      • Colonial Viper 15.1.1

        🙂

        • dad4justice 15.1.1.1

          “How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.”
          Oscar Wilde had it right eh Don. Suck on another lemon Miss Clark! Checkmate nicky.

          • toad 15.1.1.1.1

            FFS, who invited you back, d4j?

            • dad4justice 15.1.1.1.1.1

              Who the hell are you to ask you old washed up green fungi. Go on a date with big bruv and get back to me – creep!

            • lprent 15.1.1.1.1.2

              He actually currently does not have a ban and hasn’t had one for several years. He tends to obey the warnings enough to avoid bans, and I haven’t had to get moderator irritated with him for quite some time. That means he gets to comment here unless he runs afoul of one of the mods.

              I don’t think he adds that much to the debate. But he doesn’t seem to limit it anymore either. More like ambient noise?

              • Thank you Iprent. Bad luck toady and big bruv, oh my, narking is no good here at the standard where demerit narks are not rewarded for their cowardise.

              • Colonial Viper

                Isn’t ambient noise supposed to be calming and pleasantly sleep inducing?

                • felix

                  No that’s not what it means. Hippie.

                • lprent

                  You obviously don’t live around Ponsonby Road. On Fridays and Saturday the ambient noise is often relationship breakups on our street corner…. While we are trying to sleep.

                  My concept of ambient noise may be different to yours?

      • Blue 15.1.2

        Blighty lacks sense of humour, gets hysterical and asks “life partner” for genitals back.

  16. “Frankly, I’m looking to old for this job”

  17. sally 18

    “Alright – who made the crack about me running in East Coast Bays?”

  18. tc 19

    Hurry up bansky, annoint either clown to run for the ‘pretending to be central wing’ in Epsom……don’t make me come over

  19. Leopold 20

    Unknown to the Empire, Palpantine secretly wears spectacles…
    OK, its nasty but the resemblance…

    • The Voice of Reason 20.1

      It’s not that nasty; Juilia Gillard reminds me of Jar Jar Binks, which is far, far worse, IMHO.

  20. Kaplan 21

    It’s not OK.

  21. Don Brash has suddenly realised that he is being parodied by @DrBrash on twitter and has read some of his tweats.

  22. higherstandard 23

    Geriatric has been superior to current leader of opposition and deputy PM.

    NZ public abandons all hope.

  23. ianmac 24

    What’s that Banksie? You are going to sack me? But but…..

  24. Morrissey 25

    “Eeeeeehhh, the only way for us to catch up to Australia is for New Zealand workers to take massive pay cuts. I am perfectly serious.” *

    * No joke. He actually said this.

  25. toad 26

    Act Leader Don Brash welcomed Alex Fogerty’s decision to leave National to join Act.

    “Like Bob Clarkson, John Banks and I, Alex has seen the need to give some backbone to the Government. Like us, he believes in ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Führer one law for all,” said Dr Brash.

  26. joe90 27

    Alex, I am your father.

  27. Pascal's bookie 28

    Gentleman Don: “There’s no room for vulgarity in plutocracy son”

  28. rod 29

    Do you think botox would pull in the punters for me Duncan.

  29. William Joyce 30

    The body has been discovered of the dead man whose identity was stolen by David Garrett.

    • Adolf Fiinkensein 30.1

      Politics aside, that really IS funny.

      Many of the other comments wouldn’t make it into a fourth form school mag.

  30. NIGGUH WHUT !!!

  31. William Joyce 32

    Yo, porch monkey, read my speech!

  32. Tangled up in blue 33

    “Well, that’s odd … I’ve just robbed a man of his livelihood, and yet I feel strangely empty. Tell you what, Smithers – have him beaten to a pulp.”

  33. I don’t like you.

  34. felix 36

    You’re not a maaree are you? I don’t see why maarees should have cameras, there’s no mention of photography in the treaty.

    • lprent 36.1

      Yes, all palangi should desist from taking photos of me as well – it isn’t the treaty of waitaiinnnggiiiiiii. Neither is the electronics of the standard. Kiwiblog… Oops – umm – aha – sewers were around!!!!!!

  35. Principessa 37

    Promotional Poster for HP and Deathly Hallows 2.

  36. Jenny 38


    Don’t vote for me.

    I don’t need you to vote for me.

    I have never needed you to vote for me.

    I will never need you to vote for me.

    I will get into parliament even if not one person votes for me.

    I don’t have a mandate.

    I don’t need a mandate.

    I don’t want a mandate.

    I will determine the direction of the next government, without a mandate.

    Pitchforked by rich lobbyists to the head of the National Party, I was unelectable.

    Pitchforked to the head of the the ACT Party by wealthy lobbyists, I am still unelectable.

    It doesn’t matter that I am unelectable, with big money behind the John Banks campaign I will be pitchforked into parliament on his coat tails.

    Beware: I hate and despise you all and when I get into parliament I am determined to demonstrate it.

    You have been warned.

  37. You wanna be a real Mafia Don like Al Capone then you must get shafted by a large nose slippery Key and his fat blob mate Gerry.

  38. Scott 41

    “Release the Hounds!”

  39. Jenny 42

    The triumph of the will.

  40. Bored 43

    Luke Skywalker…I am….

  41. prism 44

    I’ve trimmed my eyebrows and now I’m ready to trim you down to size.

  42. Policy Parrot 45

    He’ll have to swap those blue contact lenses for yellow ones.

  43. Simon Lusk you promised that you could bring ACT’s polling around and all it rose was a paltry 0.2% …

  44. crashcart 47

    UUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMM……. Anyone got some Xlax, I am so full of shit it keeps coming out my mouth.

  45. Treetop 48

    I wear a suit when I go into WINZ for my superannuation cause I’m in a class of my own.

  46. Who would have an affair with him ..let alone marry him.

  47. johnm 50

    The DON says: I’m going to make you an offer you caan’t refuse! I’ll cut you in when we loot the public wealth, white collar stuff: big tax cuts!

    Quote from the Godfather

  48. Jenny 51

    Mu-um-umy….. There is a horrible man staring at me.

  49. Frank Macskasy 52

    “It soon became apparent that the alien lizard-men had not quite perfected their human-skin disguise…”

  50. Bob 53

    Any one for a pie ? I think cameron left a couple of mince and cheese in my fridge ?

  51. ropata 54

    Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.
    I call this one “Blue Steel”.
    My economic theory was blown up in a totally unexpected petrol station accident!

  52. ARE YOU EYBALLIN’ ME ?…NIGGA I WILL FUCK YOU UP !!!

    [lprent: That is getting over the edge. Too noisy apart from anything else. And teasing people for being raised in the 19th century is quite unfair. ]

    • Blue 55.1

      Gee you’re all class aren’t you ‘wog.

      • pollywog 55.1.1

        Gee you’re all class aren’t you ‘wog.

        …i can actually envision The Don saying that to just about anybody not of his ‘race’, but then again i can picture him in a spandex teddy saying ‘spank me Mistress Odgers’ to Cactus Kate too.

  53. randal 56

    now where did I put that spare slice of baloney

  54. kriswgtn 57

    I have just had my botox

  55. mikesh 58

    Is that a camera I see in front of me? Then why can’t I just smile and wave like that other fellow?

  56. DeeDub 59

    ” Where’s The CORNED Beef? “

  57. anipere 60

    ET, Daddy’s waiting

  58. Wolfslair 61

    Damn, why doesn’t all this economic mumbo jumbo I learned in kindergarten work on real people.

  59. M 62

    Archeologists found something older than the pyramids.

  60. Jim Nald 63

    “With its wrinkly pink skin, beady eyes and outsize teeth, the naked mole rat resembles a sabretoothed sausage. But the strange-looking mammal has a secret which is fascinating scientists searching for a cure for diseases of old age, particularly cancer.

    “Despite being only four inches long, the rodent lives for 30 years – seven times longer than a normal rat – and appears not to be afflicted with the world’s number one killer disease.

    “Researchers have now taken a step towards understanding the extraordinary reason for its longevity and resistance ….. ”

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/europe/news/article.cfm?l_id=7&objectid=10736954

    oops. sorry. mistaken copy and paste job. wrong post.

  61. Craig 64

    “Don!!! Where did you put that beneficiary’s baby?!”
    “URRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!”

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