Caption contest
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8:18 am, October 5th, 2012 - 59 comments
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I love this picture.
First, because of how tone-deaf Key has obviously become that his first tweet from his ‘important job creating trip to meet movie executives’ that everyone is so cynical about is a picture of him hanging out with a TV star – who, I’m pretty sure, doesn’t make decisions on filming locations in blockbuster movies. (Does anyone seriously think movie executives make multi-million filming decisions based on meeting a PM anyway?)
Second, because of how awkward Key looks, arms limp, suit jacket unbuttoned, looking the wrong way, next to a guy who clearly knows how take a good picture.
And what does it say about your place in the world when you go to the movie stars, not the other way around ? Clearly, you’re not very important in the scale of things.
Anyhoo, caption contest.
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- Release: Labour, Greens and Te Pāti Māori call on the Prime Minister to block the Treaty Principle...
The opposition parties stand united for an Aotearoa that honours Te Tiriti, rather than seeking to rewrite it. Labour, the Greens and Te Pāti Māori are working together against the Government’s divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...2 weeks ago
- NZ must pursue independent foreign policy
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- Child Protection Investigation Unit established
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Ka nui te mihi kia koutou. Ka mihi ki te mana whenua ko Ngāti Whātua Ōrākei. Kia ora and good morning everyone. Thank you Fran and Simon for inviting me here today, and importantly your leadership of this forum over several years now. I want to acknowledge David Gehrenbeck, Deputy ...9 hours ago
- Record number of submissions received on granny flat proposal
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- District Court Judge appointed
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- Appointments strengthen Predator Free 2050
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- New facility in Christchurch will improve the lives of young New Zealanders
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- Driver safety screens to be installed on Auckland buses
Transport Minister Simeon Brown has welcomed news from the NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) that bus driver protection screens will be installed across Auckland’s bus fleet by 2026.“The Government is committed to improving the safety of working environments for bus drivers, and Budget 2024 allocated $15 million of Crown funding over ...14 hours ago
- Government action provides Southland farmers more time to meet plan requirements
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- Bill reaffirms Government’s commitment to crack down on serious youth offending
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- Critical milestones for earthquake buildings review
Fairer, more sensible rules about managing earthquake risks are a step closer with the passing of legislation and the appointment of an independent chair to provide expert advice, Minister for Building and Construction Chris Penk says. “The Government is committed to reinvigorating our cities and regions to support economic growth, ...1 day ago
- State of the art radiology machine for Auckland
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- Foreign Minister to visit Europe
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- First arrests made under gang patch ban
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- Better support for victims of sexual violence
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- Government moving forward with Regional Deals
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- MSA pilot participant update
One of the ten young men selected to participate in the Military-Style Academy Pilot has allegedly reoffended. Children’s Minister Karen Chhour is disappointed but says it would be naïve to think that none of these young men would reoffend. “I’m saddened that this young person has not taken this opportunity ...1 day ago
- Fighting for Kiwis in Trade
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Associate Education Minister David Seymour says that school attendance is continuing to rise. In Term 3 of 2024 51.3 per cent of students attended school regularly, an increase of 5.3 percentage points from 46 per cent in Term 3 of 2023. “This Government has prioritised student attendance and it is ...2 days ago
- Improving the lives of young New Zealanders
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- Government continues work to reinstate livestock exports by sea
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Tēnā koutou katoa – it is a pleasure to be here today. I would like to begin by acknowledging the important leadership role you all play in ensuring a quality health system New Zealanders can trust. There is enormous clinical expertise in this room covering a wide range of disciplines. ...2 days ago
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Tēnā koutou katoa. Mr President, Excellencies, Delegates. New Zealand, and all nations represented here today, are already dealing with the impacts of climate change. Our households, businesses, and economies are bearing the costs of its effects. The choices we make now will shape the severity of these impacts for generations ...3 days ago
- Latest Quarterly Investment Report released
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- New Zealand supporting loss and damage fund
Climate Change Minister Simon Watts announced New Zealand will contribute NZ$10 million to the new Fund for Responding to Loss and Damage while at the annual United Nations Climate Change Conference (COP29) in Baku, Azerbaijan. “New Zealand is joining the global effort to address the significant challenge of responding to ...3 days ago
- Gang crackdown begins at stroke of midnight
The free ride for gangs is over when the clock strikes midnight tonight, with tough new laws officially coming into effect, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith and Police Minister Mark Mitchell say. “Gang patches will no longer be able to be worn in public. To earn the right to wear a ...3 days ago
- LGFA increases borrowing capacity to support high growth councils
The Government is welcoming the decision by the Local Government Funding Agency to increase access to financing tools for fast growing councils to support greater investment in critical infrastructure, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown says.“Communities across the country are facing an infrastructure deficit and significant population growth is projected in ...3 days ago
- Temporary Traffic Management costs revealed
The Government has revealed that over the past three years, the New Zealand Transport Agency (NZTA) has spent an eyewatering $786 million of taxpayers’ money on road cones and temporary traffic management (TTM), Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.“When I became Minister, I was surprised to learn that that NZTA did ...3 days ago
- Jurisdiction of Disputes Tribunal to double
Legislation that will double the financial jurisdiction of the Disputes Tribunal from $30,000 to $60,000 has passed first reading in Parliament today, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith. “We need to improve court timeliness and access to justice so that Kiwis and get on with their lives. Court delays affect everyone, the ...3 days ago
- Protecting New Zealand from foreign interference
Legislation that will specifically criminalise foreign interference and strengthen espionage offences has passed first reading in Parliament today, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “It is normal and appropriate for states to interact and work to influence one another. This encourages cooperation and can have mutually beneficial outcomes. “However, the reality ...3 days ago
- Significant milestone for Canterbury Road of National Significance
Transport Minister Simeon Brown has welcomed news that the NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) Board has approved funding towards pre-implementation and early works on the State Highway 1 (SH1) Belfast to Pegasus Motorway and Woodend Bypass Road of National Significance (RoNS). “Reaching this significant milestone is a reflection of our Government’s ...3 days ago
- Health survey results to help drive change
Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says findings from the annual Health Survey highlight the need to continue driving better health outcomes for New Zealanders. The New Zealand Health Survey is an annual snapshot of key metrics measured from July 2023 – July 2024. Findings released this morning include: In 2023/24, ...3 days ago
- Final push needed to get to Smokefree 2025
A renewed effort to get people to quit smoking will build on what has worked to date and target the groups who most need support, Associate Health Minister Casey Costello said today. “The latest New Zealand Health Survey results show the daily smoking rate at 6.9 per cent and we ...3 days ago
- New diplomatic appointments
Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters has announced four new diplomatic appointments. “Our diplomats play an important role in ensuring New Zealand’s interests are maintained and enhanced across the world,” Mr Peters says. “It is a pleasure to announce the appointment of these senior diplomats from the Ministry of Foreign ...4 days ago
- Next steps for Regulatory Standards Bill
Regulation Minister David Seymour has today announced the next steps in the Government’s plan improve the quality of regulation by opening consultation on a proposed Regulatory Standards Bill. “New Zealand's low wages can be blamed on low productivity, and low productivity can be blamed on poor regulation,” says Mr Seymour. ...4 days ago
- Red Tape Tipline goes live
Minister for Regulation David Seymour has today announced that the Ministry for Regulation’s Red Tape Tipline is now live. “We want to hear about your red tape horror stories. From today, New Zealanders will have a say on how they are regulated through an online portal,” says Mr Seymour. The ...4 days ago
- Youth Parliament 2025 announced
The Minister for Youth Matt Doocey has today announced the eleventh Youth Parliament will be taking place in 2025. “Youth Parliament offers a unique youth development opportunity to young people from across New Zealand to experience the political process and learn about how government works,” says Mr Doocey. “The two-day ...4 days ago
- Police stats show promising change
After nearly a year in Government, Kiwis have seen significant change across law and order with promising early results shown across some Police statistics, says Police Minister Mark Mitchell. “In August 2023, I told New Zealanders that if they had not started to see a change in public safety within ...4 days ago
- Better coordination of anti-scam efforts
With the launch of Fraud Awareness Week, the Government is committing to new coordination efforts across industry and government to combat online scams, Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly says. “Online financial scams are a growing problem for New Zealand. New data released today shows that Kiwis lost nearly ...4 days ago
- Minister to consider 7AA select committee report
Minister for Children Karen Chhour will consider the recommendations made by the Social Services and Community Committee in its report back to Parliament on the Oranga Tamariki (Repeal of Section 7AA) Amendment Bill. “I want to thank the people who made submissions and those who appeared before the committee in ...5 days ago
- Defence Minister to attend ASEAN meeting
Defence Minister Judith Collins will this week attend the Association of Southeast Asian Nations (ASEAN) Defence Ministers’ Meeting-Plus in Vientiane, Laos. “We need to take every opportunity to engage with our international partners, given the increasingly unstable geo-political situation,” Ms Collins says. “New Zealand has a long-standing commitment to this ...5 days ago
- Maritime Union joins opposition to live export shipments
The Maritime Union also has zero faith in government assurances of a gold standard for ships used for the trade. ...2 hours ago - Offshore oil and gas ban ‘worst political decision’, Shane Jones says
Shane Jones says the offshore oil and gas ban is "the worst political decision" he has ever been involved with. ...3 hours ago
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A series of frantic text messages from Andrew Bayly to government staffers amid scrutiny over his actions at a winery have been revealed. ...4 hours ago
- ACT’s David Seymour won’t ‘bow down’ to his hapū leaders
They have pleaded with the ACT leader to stop what they say are abusive violations of Te Tiriti o Waitangi. ...6 hours ago
- Former political figure who abused teens loses name suppression
However, his name remains under wraps as he has already indicated he will appeal. ...6 hours ago
- Educating young people about social media would be far more effective than a ban – Finland can sh...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Susan Grantham, Lecturer in Communication, Griffith University Shutterstock The federal government’s proposed social media ban for under-16s has sparked widespread debate, affecting millions of young Australians, their families and educators. But will it actually work? While the aim behind this ban ...6 hours ago - Ant stings can be painful. Here’s how to avoid getting stung this summer (and what to do if you do...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Sam Robinson, Senior Research Fellow, Institute for Molecular Bioscience, The University of Queensland AG-PHOTOS/Shutterstock With the start of summer just days away, many of us will be looking forward to long sunny days spent at the beach, by the pool, out ...6 hours ago
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The only published and available best-selling indie book chart in New Zealand is the top 10 sales list recorded every week at Unity Books’ stores in High St, Auckland, and Willis St, Wellington. AUCKLAND 1 Orbital by Samantha Harvey (Jonathan Cape, $26) The slight, superb winner of the Booker Prize ...9 hours ago
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- New Child Protection Investigation Unit announced by Children’s Minister
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- In-person submissions on Treaty Principles Bill to be at Parliament or by video call
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The committee plans to hold hearings in the week starting Monday, 27 January and the weeks starting 10, 17 and 24 February 2025. ...12 hours ago
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Actually, I didn’t really meet Simon Baker. I just got one of my staff to photoshop me in.
GCSB surveillance has revealed that the real identity of Red John is Kim Dotcom.
“Now that I’ve finally found Red John, how do I get him to admit his crimes?”
PS: I just clicked on those scoop links to JK’s tweets. What a failure as a PM! He just likes schmoozing with the wealthy, famous and powerful.
His tweets are all about showing how rich and powerful he is to his followers. They have no other value.
Oh God I didn’t even know who Simon Baker was until I looked up the tweeter link. And the Mentalist? I mean: Lying Scumbag meets the Mentalist. I’m sure they could have used that for a plot line!
Geez, the things you have to do as a TV actor!
And for those who haven’t watched the show, Red John is the serial killer who murdered Patrick Jane’s (played by Simon Baker) wife and daughter.
LOL. Thanks
One of these men is a mentalist living in a world of greed, crime and lies. The other is an actor.
“Read my mind”
“I’m drawing a blank”
” Look at moi “
” Sh sh dont talk about what is happening at home in nuzlnd,just look like we are
great mates, hey, why dont you smile,you
are an actor,aren’t you? i’m john key and i
own nuzlnd wif me mates.
Hollow man gives wooden performance
Liar Liar star in Mentalist cameo: forgets lines – again!
Day / Interior.
Generic, conventionally handsome American actor
I know your name is Mr Key, but get out of my key light, you’re casting a shadow over may perfect American features!
Bland, ex currency trader, self made, twat PM
Don’t worry ’bout it. This shadow is nothing compared to the one I’m casting over my own country. Sorry, I don’t mean MY country, of course it’s YOUR country. Please come down and wipe your TPP shoes on us. Remember the old film biz saying about us kiwi’s – “Mexicans with cell phones”. I love show biz, especially you beautiful people. It’s unfortunate that behind the scenes there’s ugly, greedy film “industry” workers and actors who want reasonable conditions. Race to the bottom, creative sweat shop that’s what I preach…….. I how depressing. You don’t have any snuff movie shoots I can act in do you? LOL.
Generic, conventionally handsome American actor
I’m sorry, is that actually English you’re speaking? Did you bring a translator with you?
Australian actor – otherwise good
Actually he’s australian.
I think we would be hard pressed to top the one Mr Dotcom apparently posted on his facebook
http://imgur.com/RsaqL
Yup. That brought out a laugh.
Planking fail.
Hey, you did those ANZ ads, so your sort of a banker too then. Can we be mates? Please…oh go on…
Mr Bean’s Overseas Holiday
😀
sadly the audition was a disaster and the new remake of the Odd Couple movie has been shelved. key apologised for not reading the script and for never having heard of ‘auditions’, he quiped that normally he just gets tapped on the shoulder.
Tune in to watch statesmanship being reduced to entertainment.
“I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking that trying to be cool by being photographed with a popular actor will endear you to the folks back home who’ve just realised that you’re a charlatan. You’re thinking that, failing that, it will at least be another snap to add to your ‘famous people I’ve been photographed with’ scrapbook from your days as PM. You’re thinking how Hawaii is so close you can almost taste it. You can taste it, John. Just give in and feel the pull of golf courses and sunshine, and revel in your minor celebrity status as a former PM of a tiny country at the bottom of the world. We live on Planet Key.”
Dork meets Dash!
The Mentalist and the Mental.
aside:
I can’t or don’t understand why JohnKeyPM was tweeting about dinner with Jim Cameron (other than the rather sad look at how cool am am motives – how old is he, 12?)
“John Key @johnkeypm
With Director Jim Cameron and Producer Jon Landau, who have hosted dinner for me in LA. pic.twitter.com/DyfvVHTk”
It’s James as far as I can tell – except on twitter where James tweets as Jim
https://twitter.com/JimCameron
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Cameron
I imagine the GCSB briefed him on such matters?
hope he didn’t start dinner with “Gidday Jim”…. or Hekia Parata might give him a talking to about common courtesy
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/politics/news/article.cfm?c_id=280&objectid=10838208
its all rather confusing really
it’s to suggest that he is really close friends with Cameron, so knows him by his intimate diminutive – just like Spock called Kirk ‘Jim’
Kiwi fool meets Aussie cool.
Like
I thought it was the guy from honey i shrunk the kids… So nearly typed my caption
Honey, i shrunk the economy, but made friends with celebrities.
This kind of junket and time wasting by our leader is more than a shame its a slap in the face for all kiwis
“Having lost his own ability to recall, Key went to an expert to find out what he was thinking.”
lolololol
How disengaged the actor looks! Why Key’s vacuous smile – usually that signals another lie coming on!
Incompetence meets faux investigator… while actor looks on
I can’t wait to tell him about my movie idea ….
L8r ….
(*squirmy-leggy-thing*) You probably know this already but ….
“It all started in a land far far away …….”
Butcher, Baker…
The Kansas City Shuffle/s next to Mr Goodkat
(The Wrong Man)
I’m in tight with a demon called Deception
It’s alright he’s a treatin me quite well
I’m in tight with a demon called Deception
He’s a right besides me when I fail.
-Grant Lee Buffalo
(too easy, John, more creative than a cross word)
dedicated to Eddie 🙂
Hi I am Simon Baker an actor who pretends to read peoples minds.
Hi Im John Key I pretend to be a prime minister and I keep loosing my mind.
Perhaps someone should introduce Key to the actor off Unforgotten it might help.
One of these has the capacity to retain what they read for the next show, the other one does not.
No wonder Key has had to meet with GCSB 15 times this year because he keeps forgetting why he meets with the GCSB.
Of all the things i’ve lost i miss my mind the most
*smiles* Bollox I hope this guy doesn’t decide to live in NZ and then get caught up in some sort of scandal, nobody will believe it when I deny all knowledge of his existence. *smiles*
Must remember to ask about that “Amnesia Syrum In the Water supply” gambit. *smiles*
Bloody worked for me *smiles*
What’d they say again not more than once a month? …. or was it once a day?
Can you read bud, *holds-up-medicinal-bottle* …. what are the warnings again?
Who is the mentalist?
And…. the subject of Dotcom was raised “in passing” at the dinner party John Landau and James (Jim for John) Cameron threw for John Key.
Here is my version of how it went
“Pleased to meet you, I’d shake your hand, but Richie McCaw isn’t here.”
They’re thinking the same way. We live your world. ANZ.
Your thinking.. if you had been sucessfull getting Kim Dotcom extradited you would be standing next to Tom Cruise instead of me.
very good
Yeah I know, awkward eh but the folks back home lap up any shit I get up to, thanks mate you were oarsum in doctor who.
the Menatalist: “who is this guy?”
“Is this a cardboard cutout of a suit I see beside me?”
“So ah John is this your first psychosis? I didn’t realize you kiwis were so far behind the times.”
Sorry, what’s your name again? my memory is not too good.
Du yu think this suit fits me properly? Wut about the arms, bit short yu thunk?
Wut about the tie? Goes with the suit?
Wut if I keep the smile goin? Wutcha think eh?
Please be my friend, I’ve got no friends, I forgot thim all……..
Can I hive a job soon?
I’ll be standing at attention plenty on this trip to Hollywood, hope I don’t lose the memory stick.