Memo from Crosby Textor – National’s leak problem
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7:34 am, December 5th, 2018 - 23 comments
Categories: humour, jacinda ardern, making shit up, national, paula bennett, same old national, Satire, Simon Bridges, spin, the praiseworthy and the pitiful, you couldn't make this shit up -
Tags: crosby textor, jami-lee ross, maggie barry
Memo from Crosby Textor
To senior office holders in the National Party
As part of this firm’s intelligence gathering role we have kept up to date with New Zealand politics even though our professional services are not currently required.
We have prepared this memo because the New Zealand conservative movement has become a laughing stock throughout the world, even worse than their Australian counterpart. Scott Morrison’s favourability ratings are not as bad as Simon Bridges’ and this is not a situation we ever thought could occur.
It seems clear to us that the party is in melt down, shown by the number of recent leaks that have occurred.
In no particular order this year there has been the following leaks. The list is not exhaustive. They include:
- Discussions concerning the replacement of Bill English as leader being well advanced.
- Simon Bridges’ travel expenses
- Caucus discussions about the leaking of Simon Bridges’s travel expenses.
- An email from Paula Bennett to Parliamentary Services staff about the leak inquiry.
- Glenda Hughes’ involvement in sorting out Jami-Lee Ross.
- Bridges using his magical prosecutorial skills to determine who the leaker was.
- Polling data suggesting that Bridges is not liked and his caucus wants him gone.
- Details concerning funding received from the Cathedral Club.
- National’s latest polling which contradicts the very favourable Colmar Brunton polling that recently occurred. This was particularly damaging because it questioned CB’s favourable result.
- Allegations about Maggie Barry being a bully.
- More allegations about Maggie Barry being a bully.
- Yet more allegations about Maggie Barry being a bully.
- Internal talking points on how to handle the allegations that Maggie Barry is a bully.
- An email instructing a ministerial staff member to work on a letter to National Party members contradicting Barry’s claim she had not breached Parliament’s rules.
Simon Bridges’ claim that the latest leak did not come from within National is laughable and mirror his previous identical claim which was also laughable. This is even worse than his earlier claim that he used his prosecutorial skills to ascertain that Trevor Mallard was the leaker, a claim made shortly before he announced that it was actually Jami-Lee Ross who was the leaker.
And besides it should be abundantly clear that Ross is not the current leaker. The possibility is that there are many leakers from within National’s caucus.
We always were concerned that the evidence supporting the allegation that Jami-Lee Ross was the original leaker of Bridges’ travel information was not sufficient. We understand that he was, but the public justification was weak in the extreme. We accept however that if Ross’s motivation for leaking the information was exposed it would cause further reputational damage to the party.
One final piece of advice. There has been recent concerted effort to denigrate Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern on the basis she did not front up yesterday to Parliament. She was in an important meeting with the head of South Korea. Such criticism makes the party look churlish and lacking in important matters to criticise the Government about. We recommend that further attacks of this sort are not pursued with.
Should your party wish to engage our services again there will be a 30% premium applied to our normal charges given the enormity of the job and the potential risk to our reputation.
Under no circumstances should the contents of this memorandum be disclosed to anyone outside of the immediate distribution list. Any publication of it is bound to bring further ridicule on the party.
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The Prime Minister must answer the call from a group of senior lawyers of the King’s Counsel to abandon the divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...1 week ago
- Chris Hipkins’ apology statement to state and faith-based care survivors
...1 week ago
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Today, the Green Party stands alongside the survivors of abuse in state care and faith-based care as the Government issues an historic apology. ...1 week ago
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The Green Party has written to the Speaker of the House requesting he enable a personal vote on the Treaty Principles Bill. ...2 weeks ago
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For tomorrow’s apology to survivors of abuse in state and faith-based care to hold any water, the Government must not pursue the same policies that drove the abuse in the first place. ...2 weeks ago
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Concerns about the tobacco industry’s ability to interfere in government policy making remain, despite the inability of the Office of the Auditor-General to investigate the Government’s decision to halve the excise tax on heated tobacco products. ...2 weeks ago
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Kua hinga te manawa kairākau o Te Rua Tekau Ma Waru Tiwhatiwha te po! Kakarauru i te po! Ka rapuhia kei hea koe kua riro! Haere e te Ika a Whiro ki o tini hoa kua ngaro atu ki te Pō ...2 weeks ago
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The opposition parties stand united for an Aotearoa that honours Te Tiriti, rather than seeking to rewrite it. Labour, the Greens and Te Pāti Māori are working together against the Government’s divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...2 weeks ago
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The opposition parties stand united for an Aotearoa that honours Te Tiriti, rather than seeking to rewrite it. Labour, the Greens and Te Pāti Māori are working together against the Government’s divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...2 weeks ago
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The Deputy Prime Minister should apologise to the public servant he named and blamed for something they did not do, and for misusing the rules of Parliament. ...2 weeks ago
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Tēnā koutou katoa – it is a pleasure to be here today. I would like to begin by acknowledging the important leadership role you all play in ensuring a quality health system New Zealanders can trust. There is enormous clinical expertise in this room covering a wide range of disciplines. ...2 days ago
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Tēnā koutou katoa. Mr President, Excellencies, Delegates. New Zealand, and all nations represented here today, are already dealing with the impacts of climate change. Our households, businesses, and economies are bearing the costs of its effects. The choices we make now will shape the severity of these impacts for generations ...2 days ago
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Kia ora koutou katoa. Nau mai, haere mai, piki mai. Ki te mihi atu ahau, ki te manwhenua nei, Te Atiawa, Ngāti toa rangatira, tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou katoa. Thank you, Andy, for your introduction. Let me acknowledge you as the new Chief Executive of the Social Investment ...7 days ago
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Prime Minister Christopher Luxon did not meet the Treaty Principles Bill hikoi crowd, sees “nothing” of merit in the Act-proposed law but the Parliament his Government dominates will spend six months debating a “divisive” measure.That’s because he has accepted there needs to be “aeration” of people’s views on the Treaty, ...2 hours ago
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Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Friday 22 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...2 hours ago
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The server will be getting hardware changes this evening starting at 10pm NZDT.
The site will be off line for some hours.
Had to smile right through this on such a nasty looking day, weatherwise. Thanks, Crosby Textor Group. lol
Somebody needs to put their finger in the dyke!
For some reason that comment made me think of this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qa7uLxu0XAc
I don’t know why
I was thinking more along this line
Sorry but I’m a bit of a british innuendo kick at the moment:
Might be a bit beyond a finger…
A well-compiled list there. Makes the Nat caucus seem like a colander: `you’re wrong, this container has no holes’. In that analogy, the water that is poured into it is anything that makes a rival Nat look bad.
Conservative rivalry is big in the UK media currently but not here. We need more exposure. RNZ is being proactive: https://www.radionz.co.nz/news/national/377477/hawke-s-bay-feedlot-battle-strategist-hit-with-legal-costs
Turns out that Simon Lusk has become a shapeshifter. The gun-nut thing has been displaced by the blue-green activist stance. “The Havelock North resident filed a case against the Hawke’s Bay Regional Council in the Environment Court in August, using evidence from a Waimarama farm which he said used feedlots that were damaging soils and groundwater.”
Goddam polluting Nat-voters getting away with regional councillor collusion, you can see why he was pissed off. And now the bureaucrats are trying to make him pay for blowing the whistle!!
A lot of the “gun nut” brigade are hunters and fishermen, and very passionate about environmental protection where it affects their interests, like keeping rivers clean so they can go fishing. Unfortunately this environmental concern can be rather selective, not having fossil fuels for their double cab ute might be another matter.
But Lusk has been very active in campaigning against dairy in Hawkes Bay and the Ruataniwha dam proposal.
Well, good on him then. I wonder if he’s actually a member of the blue-greens. That would be useful info. The seventies Values schism casts a long shadow…
BREAKING NEWS – ANOTHER TEXT FROM SOMEONE CLAIMING TO BE A NAT MP WITH DETAILS OF YESTERDAY’S CAUCUS MEETING
[Initially posted on OM but then decided better here.]
RNZ is reporting that they have received a text as above.
Fairly short so here is most of the report:
https://www.radionz.co.nz/news/political/377531/leaker-claiming-to-be-national-mp-sends-another-text
And here is the link to RNZ’s earlier report yesterday with Bridges’ claiming the link of the internal polling did not come from a Nat MP.
https://www.radionz.co.nz/news/political/377459/new-leaks-didn-t-come-from-national-mp-bridges
The texter offered details of what happened in yesterday’s caucus meeting as proof they were an MP.
Why has RNZ withheld those details? I recognise it would be wrong to reveal anything personal etc. but they could release something that would act as proof.
Good grief: this is making Labour’s former leaking woes look like a Sunday School picnic.
Why would it be wrong?
RNZ only posted the article re the latest text about 10.50am, with a short item in the 11am news bulletin, so it maybe that they have only received the text this morning and may be seeking legal advice before saying anything further.
That’s my guess, but strictly unsubstantiated speculation on my part.
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Unrelated to the latest text leak, but related to the post, perhaps the Nats need some help from Sroubek’s former wife’s National party friend who was co-founder of a NZ incontinence underwear firm, Confitex – LOLOLOL
https://www.stuff.co.nz/business/industries/88523796/from-urban-planning-to-underwear-confitex-cofounder-mark-davey
http://ourauckland.aucklandcouncil.govt.nz/articles/news/2017/10/mark-davey-resigns-from-waitemata-local-board/
He is no longer with Confitex but since March 2018 or thereabouts has been the first CEO of another NZ start-up firm.
“The establishment of Walk On is a “pretty amazing Kiwi story”, new chief executive Mark Davey says.
The company, founded by young entrepreneur Lucas Smith, produces blister protection products using soft merino wool.
It has appointed Dr Davey as its first chief executive as part of an initiative to carry the momentum of Walk On’s initial domestic success into international markets. …”
https://www.nzherald.co.nz/the-country/news/article.cfm?c_id=16&objectid=12110192
Appropriate, dont prevent the leak just soak it up.
Wow same modus operendii as the leaker of the previous information.
Incredible. Bridges is back to square one. I wonder if he’ll handle it differently this time?
That is the ‘VERY INTERESTING’ aspect in my opinion. LOL.
Also – have you read the second part of my 4.1.2 above re Confitex?
Some natz working hard to oust bridges. Could the Standard run a poll?
What is going on? There’s dissension in the ranks to be sure, but it looks like it’s getting out of control. At least three factions have developed and they’re all fighting one another? The methods being used are more brutal than Labour’s former spats but this is to be expected from National.
A 2014 piece from Chris Trotter that went into The Press then would make some relevant points to now. He quotes a *study on the USA by an academic there as well as from Nicky Hager’s book Dirty Politics.
http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/politics/opinion/10397066/Dirty-politics-is-there-any-other-kind
* The American scholar, Kathleen Hall Jamieson’s, Dirty Politics: Deception, Distraction and Democracy, was first published by the Oxford University Press in 1992.
Looks like the leaker wants soimon gone who has the most to gain by this ?
It must be hard being blue right now. Having to appear supportive of Bridges, where every fibre of your being is yelling Noooooooooooooooooooooooo
BTW Simon why don’t you do another enquiry into who is the leaker, given the last one went so well………………………………………………….
For those of us at the time after the report came out who queried it be Jami-Lee, good on us………………….
Complaint laid with Auditor General over National MP Maggie Barry
https://www.stuff.co.nz/national/politics/109099652/complaint-laid-with-auditor-general-over-national-mp-maggie-barry