The Adventures of CosmoGuy: US Ambassador to New Zealand (and Samoa!)

Written By: - Date published: 1:35 pm, December 29th, 2017 - 3 comments
Categories: humour, International, Satire, us politics - Tags: , , , , ,

Reposted with permission and minor corrections from the DailyKos by Smellpir.

Christmas Greetings My Leader,

It is I, your intrepid ambassador to New Zealand (and Samoa)! Yes, Scott Brown, your most grateful of servants. I know that you haven’t replied to any of my monthly reports since I took up residence here in June which is most likely because you are busy… So here is a ‘Christmas Wrap Up’ of all the awesome ambassador things I’ve been doing over the last six months. I can promise you that the Kiwis love me and greatness is being made!


June:

When I arrived here, I opened your secret MAGA envelope which was waiting at the Russian Embassy in Wellington (did you know that? New Zealand’s capital is called Wellington? Just like the location of my favorite eatery – Kabab Corner – in Boston!). With eyes pricking with pride, I read out Steve Bannon’s secret instructions:

“Dear [Name of campaign contributor inserted here],

Your task is to MAGA in another part of the world! We have investigated New Zealand and found that even though it is a long way away, lot’s of unhappy liberals are fantasizing about moving there to escape our greatness.  Your mission is to destroy all hope of New Zealand surviving the greatness of our first 30 years in office. Your instructions will arrive monthly once Jared has fine-tuned the MPEGA ‘Make Planet Earth Great Again’ plan.

Good luck,

Steve (on behalf of Don)”

This was clearly tricky diplomatic code that I found a little bit hard to understand, so I asked my chief attaché (a really friendly old Kiwi guy called James) what it meant by ‘MPEGA’. He replied: ‘It means that you are the perfect candidate for this position, Sir’. James is a great guy. Very affirming. I asked him how Secretary Rex Tillerson’s visit went earlier that month. “Perfectly Apt Sir”, he said.

I also found a letter waiting from a previous ambassador – Carol Moseley Braun – who was here from 1999-2001. James said she was very popular and her letter was very helpful.

Dear Scott,

I heard with interest that you are going to be the Ambassador to New Zealand (and Samoa). I hope you enjoy settling into the embassy in the suburb of Woburn. Trust James, he is a top guy. And don’t imagine for a moment that being Ambassador to New Zealand (and Samoa) is a good springboard for running for President. I tried that in 2004 and it didn’t work.

Good luck, and trust the Kiwis, they’ll always tell you the truth.

Best wishes, Carol.

The Embassy is in Woburn! This is getting freaky. My second favorite place to eat is the Pintxo Pincho Tapas Bar in Woburn, MA!

July:

I haven’t yet got the next installment of Jared’s plan to MPEGA, so I asked James what his advice was. He suggested an Embassy Xmas Party! Cool idea, because he explained to me that because New Zealand is in the SOUTHERN hemisphere, Xmas is in July. Makes total sense!

The party was themed to the Lord of the Rings. I don’t know much about it as I was busy Making Massachusetts Great Again at the time the movies came out, so I got the office staff to advise me which character I should dress as. James suggested I dress as someone called Grima who was the faithful ambassador to the great wizard Saruman. This sounds perfect! I know that you like some of those grand wizards down south and apparently – according to my staff – Saruman is really like you Don! He’s very powerful and intelligent, has a great army, used to be the LOTR equivalent of a Democrat before realizing they were a pack of losers and went over to the GOP. He’s also been improving the local landscape by harvesting forests and setting up a strong industrial base for his war machine. He even has a huge tower that everyone else envies. Grima sounds a cool guy too.  Very influential with the folks of Rohan where he is ambassador, but, hint hint, he does get regular instructions from Saruman. Not even the greatest ambassador can MPEGA if he doesn’t get instructions from his awesome wizard!

August:

No MPEGA instructions yet, but cool stuff is happening here! I overheard James and his colleagues referring to me as ‘CosmoGuy’. I initially thought they might have heard about my money-raising ventures during my college years, but when I asked James he looked blank and explained that this was my NZ Secret Service codename and that in NZ, ‘Cosmo’ is short for ‘cosmically awesome’. These Kiwis are just a little bit cosmically awesome too!

In the weekends, James encouraged me to impress the regular Kiwis by doing stuff in a MPEGA kind of way. So, I’ve been going up the road to a ranchette where I have stabled my appaloosa called Pinky. I ride bare-back wearing only a pair of buckskin chaps – just like I used to when I wanted to blow off steam in the 2010 senate race in Massachusetts, or take some nice snaps to send to Uncle Vlad. James commented that this was likely to create ‘a singular impression’ on Kiwis.

But while I was being chauffeured to the ranchette for the first time, I noticed that everyone was driving on the wrong side of the road! James assured me that that Kiwis normally drive on the correct side of the road, but in honor of the astonishing way that President Trump has turned the world upside down, Kiwi drivers have agreed to drive on the opposite side of the road for the length of my tenure as Ambassador! Remarkable! I’m not sure we’ll even need a MPEGA plan here in New Zealand!

September:

Still no instructions, and all my US staff have now resigned. My Kiwi staff tell me that this is totally normal, and that they’ll be more than happy to help me MPEGA while we wait for replacements (and Jared’s instructions).

James suggested that I call up all my resources to help win the local election in New Zealand. I asked him which party the USA should favor, and he said that this might be confusing, because there were something like seven parties: “However, as you are familiar with Team Red in the US, how about you support Team Red in New Zealand?. So I did. And Team Red WON! Modesty prevents me making too much of my own role, but I think that maybe I did give Kiwis the chance to ponder the exact nature of the diplomatic relationship between our two countries and the consequences of the special moral tone and leadership qualities of our new presidency.
While Ambassadors shouldn’t ‘officially’ interfere in local politics, I was particularly popular after I used my position as Ambassador to run a competition called: ‘Give your US Ambassador a superhero name’ (not CosmoGuy of course, that one is secret!). The Kiwi public came up with some excellent suggestions. My favorite answer was ‘Code Brown’, although having the power of the US intelligence service at my disposal did make me momentarily consider ‘Brown Knows’. I must also mention that James’s eyes did bulge when I considered ‘Downtown Brown’ which he considered to be a ‘most apt rendition of Kiwi vernacular to your particular qualities as an Ambassador’.

October:

Don, get down here! There are total babes in this part of the world. But first I had to deal with some confusion because I am actually the Ambassador to New Zealand AND Samoa. Originally I thought that they were the same country, but they AREN’T and I got to visit Samoa as part of my job! While this point of confusion kept me pondering for the whole plane flight to Apia, events on the ground more than compensated. This is a part of the world where I WISH people knew more about CosmoGuy’s prior life! I made friends will all the local girls and even suggested that some of them apply to ‘work’ at Mar a Lago. Wink wink Don! There was a moment of tension when it looked like a reporter was going to blow out of all proporations this innocent discussion of the kinds of the appropriate work for girls of this level of babe-ness, but James said that he would take care of the press. Such a helpful guy James.

November:

Still no instructions, and the replacement US staff still haven’t arrived, but James is doing a superb job of helping me with the nuances of foreign policy down here. And what a vital month it has been! I was responsible for providing the NZ briefing for you – my fearless leader – on what you might do at the APEC meeting in Vietnam. This was extremely important in case you met Jacinda Ardern, the leader of Team Red and the new Prime Minister of New Zealand (but, confusingly, not Samoa!). I was wondering what to say, as the fact that I have no embassy staff means I still don’t know everything there is to know about New Zealand, but James tipped me off that the New Zealand Prime Minister would secretly love to be mistaken as ‘Justin Trudeau’s wife’. Genius suggestion James — who wouldn’t! I sent off a diplomatic cable to Rex to tee up this brilliant piece of ‘diplomatic chit chat’. I’m sure it made a lasting impression!

Initially, I wasn’t sure what APEC was, and why you – my glorious leader – should be attending, but James explained that it was the Association of Pedophile-Enabling Christians which was going to be vitally important in the run-up to the special Senate election in Alabama. I not sure what pedophile means (Steve Bannon never mentioned it at the secret Ambassador Training School at Trump Tower), but I have first-hand knowledge of how important it is to get decent, typical Republican candidates elected in special Senate elections. And… so much about Roy Moore reminds me of my own glorious run in Massachusetts – the pony riding, the girly attention, the cowboy hats, popping into the mall (to see how my issue of Cosmo was selling). If he can make it in US politics, maybe there is a pathway back for me…

December:

It is a bad month for US Ambassadors around the world. I feel for my buddies. My old bestie Nikki Haley is getting plenty of grief for telling the UN how it should run the world. James suggested that Nikki might be thinking of running for President! Didn’t she get her letter from Carol Moseley Braun? I thought Ambassadors couldn’t possibly run for President. Can they?

Meanwhile, another of my ‘Bass buddies’ (its what we called ourselves at secret Ambassador Training School) – Pete Hoekstra – made a bit of a stinker in the Netherlands. This is what happens when press freedom is allowed to run unchecked. He’ll have plenty of motivation for his part of the MPEGA plan! James mentioned that Pete Hoekstra’s chief attaché was an old friend of his from Chief Attaché School called Hans. I quipped wittily: ‘Man James, I’m glad Hans isn’t as competent as you are! You are like an NZ version of the Deep State!!!’. James replied: ‘An interesting observation Mr Ambassador”.
Now that the New Year is approaching, I’m worried that without instructions I might struggle to MPEGA down here in New Zealand. In fact, it is hard not to take it personally. I asked James about the MPEGA plan and how he thought I was going? His answer: ‘Perfectly satisfactory as far as I am concerned’. Great guy James. Don’t know what I’d do without him. But life has been getting a bit boring so I’ve spent some time checking facts on fox.com and discovered, to my great surprise, that Carol Moseley Braun is actually a Democrat! This was a low moment – how could I have been so gullible! I should have recognized her as one of the enemy from the special session of Steve’s Ambassador Training School titled ‘Recognizing our Enemies Using Gender, Religious and Racial Stereotyping’. The result is that I’ve re-read her letter and now I don’t trust her advice to me at all! Particularly her advice ‘never to run for President as US Ambassador to New Zealand (and Samoa!)’? Is this actually, just possibly, a Democrat trick? And it’s given me an absolutely awesome idea….
Smellpir

 

3 comments on “The Adventures of CosmoGuy: US Ambassador to New Zealand (and Samoa!) ”

  1. red-blooded 1

    Awesome, dude! 😎

  2. eco maori 2

    Some people got there heads stuck so far up there ass they can’t see reality
    Ana to kai

  3. paul andersen 3

    trust james, wont go wrong

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • Government backing mussel spat project
    The Coalition Government is investing in a project to boost survival rates of New Zealand mussels and grow the industry, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones has announced. “This project seeks to increase the resilience of our mussels and significantly boost the sector’s productivity,” Mr Jones says. “The project - ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    54 mins ago
  • Government focused on getting people into work
    Benefit figures released today underscore the importance of the Government’s plan to rebuild the economy and have 50,000 fewer people on Jobseeker Support, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. “Benefit numbers are still significantly higher than when National was last in government, when there was about 70,000 fewer ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 hours ago
  • Clean energy key driver to reducing emissions
    The Government’s commitment to doubling New Zealand’s renewable energy capacity is backed by new data showing that clean energy has helped the country reach its lowest annual gross emissions since 1999, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. New Zealand’s latest Greenhouse Gas Inventory (1990-2022) published today, shows gross emissions fell ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 hours ago
  • Earthquake-prone buildings review brought forward
    The Government is bringing the earthquake-prone building review forward, with work to start immediately, and extending the deadline for remediations by four years, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “Our Government is focused on rebuilding the economy. A key part of our plan is to cut red tape that ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    9 hours ago
  • Thailand and NZ to agree to Strategic Partnership
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and his Thai counterpart, Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin, have today agreed that New Zealand and the Kingdom of Thailand will upgrade the bilateral relationship to a Strategic Partnership by 2026. “New Zealand and Thailand have a lot to offer each other. We have a strong mutual desire to build ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    21 hours ago
  • Government consults on extending coastal permits for ports
    RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Transport Minister Simeon Brown have today announced the Coalition Government’s intention to extend port coastal permits for a further 20 years, providing port operators with certainty to continue their operations. “The introduction of the Resource Management Act in 1991 required ports to obtain coastal ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Inflation coming down, but more work to do
    Today’s announcement that inflation is down to 4 per cent is encouraging news for Kiwis, but there is more work to be done - underlining the importance of the Government’s plan to get the economy back on track, acting Finance Minister Chris Bishop says. “Inflation is now at 4 per ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • School attendance restored as a priority in health advice
    Refreshed health guidance released today will help parents and schools make informed decisions about whether their child needs to be in school, addressing one of the key issues affecting school attendance, says Associate Education Minister David Seymour. In recent years, consistently across all school terms, short-term illness or medical reasons ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Unnecessary bureaucracy cut in oceans sector
    Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones is streamlining high-level oceans management while maintaining a focus on supporting the sector’s role in the export-led recovery of the economy. “I am working to realise the untapped potential of our fishing and aquaculture sector. To achieve that we need to be smarter with ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Patterson promoting NZ’s wool sector at International Congress
    Associate Agriculture Minister Mark Patterson is speaking at the International Wool Textile Organisation Congress in Adelaide, promoting New Zealand wool, and outlining the coalition Government’s support for the revitalisation the sector.    "New Zealand’s wool exports reached $400 million in the year to 30 June 2023, and the coalition Government ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Removing red tape to help early learners thrive
    The Government is making legislative changes to make it easier for new early learning services to be established, and for existing services to operate, Associate Education Minister David Seymour says. The changes involve repealing the network approval provisions that apply when someone wants to establish a new early learning service, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • RMA changes to cut coal mining consent red tape
    Changes to the Resource Management Act will align consenting for coal mining to other forms of mining to reduce barriers that are holding back economic development, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. “The inconsistent treatment of coal mining compared with other extractive activities is burdensome red tape that fails to acknowledge ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • McClay reaffirms strong NZ-China trade relationship
    Trade, Agriculture and Forestry Minister Todd McClay has concluded productive discussions with ministerial counterparts in Beijing today, in support of the New Zealand-China trade and economic relationship. “My meeting with Commerce Minister Wang Wentao reaffirmed the complementary nature of the bilateral trade relationship, with our Free Trade Agreement at its ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Prime Minister Luxon acknowledges legacy of Singapore Prime Minister Lee
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon today paid tribute to Singapore’s outgoing Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.   Meeting in Singapore today immediately before Prime Minister Lee announced he was stepping down, Prime Minister Luxon warmly acknowledged his counterpart’s almost twenty years as leader, and the enduring legacy he has left for Singapore and South East ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • PMs Luxon and Lee deepen Singapore-NZ ties
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with Singapore Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong. While in Singapore as part of his visit to South East Asia this week, Prime Minister Luxon also met with Singapore President Tharman Shanmugaratnam and will meet with Deputy Prime Minister Lawrence Wong.  During today’s meeting, Prime Minister Luxon ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Antarctica New Zealand Board appointments
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters has made further appointments to the Board of Antarctica New Zealand as part of a continued effort to ensure the Scott Base Redevelopment project is delivered in a cost-effective and efficient manner.  The Minister has appointed Neville Harris as a new member of the Board. Mr ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Finance Minister travels to Washington DC
    Finance Minister Nicola Willis will travel to the United States on Tuesday to attend a meeting of the Five Finance Ministers group, with counterparts from Australia, the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom.  “I am looking forward to meeting with our Five Finance partners on how we can work ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Pet bonds a win/win for renters and landlords
    The coalition Government has today announced purrfect and pawsitive changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to give tenants with pets greater choice when looking for a rental property, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “Pets are important members of many Kiwi families. It’s estimated that around 64 per cent of New ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Long Tunnel for SH1 Wellington being considered
    State Highway 1 (SH1) through Wellington City is heavily congested at peak times and while planning continues on the duplicate Mt Victoria Tunnel and Basin Reserve project, the Government has also asked NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) to consider and provide advice on a Long Tunnel option, Transport Minister Simeon Brown ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • New Zealand condemns Iranian strikes
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Foreign Minister Winston Peters have condemned Iran’s shocking and illegal strikes against Israel.    “These attacks are a major challenge to peace and stability in a region already under enormous pressure," Mr Luxon says.    "We are deeply concerned that miscalculation on any side could ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Huge interest in Government’s infrastructure plans
    Hundreds of people in little over a week have turned out in Northland to hear Regional Development Minister Shane Jones speak about plans for boosting the regional economy through infrastructure. About 200 people from the infrastructure and associated sectors attended an event headlined by Mr Jones in Whangarei today. Last ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Health Minister thanks outgoing Health New Zealand Chair
    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti has today thanked outgoing Health New Zealand – Te Whatu Ora Chair Dame Karen Poutasi for her service on the Board.   “Dame Karen tendered her resignation as Chair and as a member of the Board today,” says Dr Reti.  “I have asked her to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Roads of National Significance planning underway
    The NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) has signalled their proposed delivery approach for the Government’s 15 Roads of National Significance (RoNS), with the release of the State Highway Investment Proposal (SHIP) today, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.  “Boosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of the Government’s plan to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Navigating an unstable global environment
    New Zealand is renewing its connections with a world facing urgent challenges by pursuing an active, energetic foreign policy, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.   “Our country faces the most unstable global environment in decades,” Mr Peters says at the conclusion of two weeks of engagements in Egypt, Europe and the United States.    “We cannot afford to sit back in splendid ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • NZ welcomes Australian Governor-General
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has announced the Australian Governor-General, His Excellency General The Honourable David Hurley and his wife Her Excellency Mrs Linda Hurley, will make a State visit to New Zealand from Tuesday 16 April to Thursday 18 April. The visit reciprocates the State visit of former Governor-General Dame Patsy Reddy ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Pseudoephedrine back on shelves for Winter
    Associate Health Minister David Seymour has announced that Medsafe has approved 11 cold and flu medicines containing pseudoephedrine. Pharmaceutical suppliers have indicated they may be able to supply the first products in June. “This is much earlier than the original expectation of medicines being available by 2025. The Government recognised ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • NZ and the US: an ever closer partnership
    New Zealand and the United States have recommitted to their strategic partnership in Washington DC today, pledging to work ever more closely together in support of shared values and interests, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.    “The strategic environment that New Zealand and the United States face is considerably more ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Joint US and NZ declaration
    April 11, 2024 Joint Declaration by United States Secretary of State the Honorable Antony J. Blinken and New Zealand Minister of Foreign Affairs the Right Honourable Winston Peters We met today in Washington, D.C. to recommit to the historic partnership between our two countries and the principles that underpin it—rule ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • NZ and US to undertake further practical Pacific cooperation
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters has announced further New Zealand cooperation with the United States in the Pacific Islands region through $16.4 million in funding for initiatives in digital connectivity and oceans and fisheries research.   “New Zealand can achieve more in the Pacific if we work together more urgently and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Government redress for Te Korowai o Wainuiārua
    The Government is continuing the bipartisan effort to restore its relationship with iwi as the Te Korowai o Wainuiārua Claims Settlement Bill passed its first reading in Parliament today, says Treaty Negotiations Minister Paul Goldsmith. “Historical grievances of Te Korowai o Wainuiārua relate to 19th century warfare, land purchased or taken ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 days ago
  • Focus on outstanding minerals permit applications
    New Zealand Petroleum and Minerals is working to resolve almost 150 outstanding minerals permit applications by the end of the financial year, enabling valuable mining activity and signalling to the sector that New Zealand is open for business, Resources Minister Shane Jones says.  “While there are no set timeframes for ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 days ago
  • Applications open for NZ-Ireland Research Call
    The New Zealand and Irish governments have today announced that applications for the 2024 New Zealand-Ireland Joint Research Call on Agriculture and Climate Change are now open. This is the third research call in the three-year Joint Research Initiative pilot launched in 2022 by the Ministry for Primary Industries and Ireland’s ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Tenancy rules changes to improve rental market
    The coalition Government has today announced changes to the Residential Tenancies Act to encourage landlords back to the rental property market, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “The previous Government waged a war on landlords. Many landlords told us this caused them to exit the rental market altogether. It caused worse ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Boosting NZ’s trade and agricultural relationship with China
    Trade and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay will visit China next week, to strengthen relationships, support Kiwi exporters and promote New Zealand businesses on the world stage. “China is one of New Zealand’s most significant trade and economic relationships and remains an important destination for New Zealand’s products, accounting for nearly 22 per cent of our good and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Freshwater farm plan systems to be improved
    The coalition Government intends to improve freshwater farm plans so that they are more cost-effective and practical for farmers, Associate Environment Minister Andrew Hoggard and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay have announced. “A fit-for-purpose freshwater farm plan system will enable farmers and growers to find the right solutions for their farm ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New Fast Track Projects advisory group named
    The coalition Government has today announced the expert advisory group who will provide independent recommendations to Ministers on projects to be included in the Fast Track Approvals Bill, say RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Regional Development Minister Shane Jones. “Our Fast Track Approval process will make it easier and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Pacific and Gaza focus of UN talks
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters says his official talks with the United Nations Secretary-General Antonio Guterres in New York today focused on a shared commitment to partnering with the Pacific Islands region and a common concern about the humanitarian catastrophe in Gaza.    “Small states in the Pacific rely on collective ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Government honours Taranaki Maunga deal
    The Government is honouring commitments made to Taranaki iwi with the Te Pire Whakatupua mō Te Kāhui Tupua/Taranaki Maunga Collective Redress Bill passing its first reading Parliament today, Treaty Negotiations Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “This Bill addresses the commitment the Crown made to the eight iwi of Taranaki to negotiate ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Enhanced partnership to reduce agricultural emissions
    The Government and four further companies are together committing an additional $18 million towards AgriZeroNZ to boost New Zealand’s efforts to reduce agricultural emissions. Agriculture Minister Todd McClay says the strength of the New Zealand economy relies on us getting effective and affordable emission reduction solutions for New Zealand. “The ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • 110km/h limit proposed for Kāpiti Expressway
    Transport Minister Simeon Brown has welcomed news the NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) will begin consultation this month on raising speed limits for the Kāpiti Expressway to 110km/h. “Boosting economic growth and productivity is a key part of the Government’s plan to rebuild the economy and this proposal supports that outcome ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago

Page generated in The Standard by Wordpress at 2024-04-18T01:55:25+00:00