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The many and varied Covid reckons of Mike Hosking

Written By: - Date published: 7:56 am, June 30th, 2020 - 49 comments
Categories: jacinda ardern, labour, making shit up, Media, national, spin, the praiseworthy and the pitiful, uncategorized, you couldn't make this shit up - Tags: , , ,

Dear readers.

I have gone out on a limb for you all and done something that I would not recommend.  I have read the past couple of months’ Mike Hosking reckons on Covid and my head hurts.

I decided to do this after reading his latest missive where he said that the Government has to open up the border so that tourism can be renewed.  He said this:

So where does all this lead? Think about that.

As we speak, people all over Europe are going on holiday. It is summer, the borders are now largely open, planes are flying, tickets are being booked, and you can go on holiday.

IATA last week issued a warning for countries like ours that if we keep borders shut we run the risk of being left behind. There is, of course, self interest in that. They are desperate for planes to fly and normality to return.

So where does all this lead? Think about that.

As we speak, people all over Europe are going on holiday. It is summer, the borders are now largely open, planes are flying, tickets are being booked, and you can go on holiday.

Clearly he wants tourism to resume.  But he does not mention lockdown.  So I presume that he thinks we should just get on with it and enjoy the wave of infections and the countless deaths that will ensue when tourists from Covid hot spots visit.

He might want to talk to his partner Kate Hawkesby who wants compulsory testing of everyone, even if they do not consent.  From Newstalk ZB yesterday:

We didn’t work as hard as we did and sacrifice as much as we have, our little team of 5 million, only to have a few people assume they’re above all that and can just swan back home without a test. No siree, that’s not the way it should go.

At this stage of the pandemic – which we’re told is “growing not slowing” – it should not even be an option to refuse a test. The test goes with the territory of coming home and isolating, surely.

Of course the testing is a side show.  The most important aspect of quarantine is to spend two weeks without showing symptoms.  If you show no symptoms then the risk of subsequent transmission is very low.

Mike has other reckons.  Like these:

  • On June 19 he thought that despite there being no examples of community spread for some time and for the quarantine system picking up a trickle of new cases the “health side of the equation been botched in comedic, tragic and gobsmackingly unprofessional fashion“.
  • On June 10 he said Ashley Bloomfield was useless and should be sacked but we should feel sorry for Air New Zealand and cut them some slack even though they are a complete financial basket case and are on Government Life Support.
  • On June 5 he insisted that New Zealand go to level one now and that Bloomfield was a “likeable wonk at the Ministry of Health who clearly has no real interest in the rest of us, unless it involves a nasal swab, an ICU bed, or some stats associated with a virus now essentially eradicated.”  And that the forecasts of doom are being proven wrong, and in many cases badly and wildly so.  I wonder if he is aware that the world has just clicked over 10 million reported infections and 500,000 reported deaths.
  • On May 29 he complained  that it was too difficult for Americas Cup teams to get into the country.  The border was obviously being too heavily policed.
  • On May 20 he thought that to win the election National needed to show “in dark days is spine, courage, conviction, and ethics“.  He also thought National should have selected Steven Joyce as leader.
  • On May 12 he thought that the lockdown “was too severe, that the evidence was there for us all to see way sooner than the Government was prepared to act on, that seven weeks should have been about four or five.”
  • On May 7, when there was one new community spread case he complained that “the success of the lockdown, even though it came too late and was messed up through a lack of quarantine, enabled the Government to fudge their way to global recognition as far as “crushing the curve” was concerned. Sadly for them, those days are fast fading” and he said confidently that we are not going to eliminate the virus after all.  Since then we have had 5 cases of community transmission, and none since May 22.
  • On May 6 he relished the High Court decision ruling that allowed a recent arrival to see his dying father and railed against Ardern and Bloomfield saying they were heartless, cold and driven by little more than statistics.
  • On April 30 he was complaining that the Government was allowing self isolation when they should have been insisting on quarantining returning kiwis.
  • On April 23 he said that in June and July we will all decide if all that emphasis on health, the panic around ICU access, being kind and the determination that weeks on end crashing an economy was worth it.  So far I am very appreciative of how it has gone.
  • On April 21 he thought the lockdown worked a treat.
  • On April 17 he railed against Ardern’s suggestion that we could eliminate the virus.  “She is wrong. Elimination is a mirage. Unless you have a vaccine, you don’t eliminate a virus. And what, given we don’t have a vaccine, does elimination look like? Ask anyone and you will not get a straight answer.”  This was potentially the dumbest take of a series of dumb takes.
  • On April 14 he thought that asymptomatic sufferers of the virus were spreading the virus around like wildfire.  Medical experts are yet to confirm this actually happens.
  • On April 9 he said that he would have quarantined all returning New Zealanders, and that all we had to do was engage in social distancing.  Tough and soft at the same time.
  • On April 1, a day made for Mike Hosking, he questioned the disease modelling.  Well ten million infections and five hundred thousand deaths later I think we can conclude that the modelling is quite sound.
  • On March 23 he opinionated that Kiwis were not “taking it seriously. And the Government telling us to simply isn’t working. If you’re not taking shopping advice from the Prime Minister you’re certainly not taking health advice.”  Five million kiwis would beg to differ.
  • March 19 and he opined that the Government should have shut the borders.  And John Key should be in charge.
  • March 16 and the Government “doesn’t know how to be bold. You don’t close your country on Saturday and tell us to wait three days to be told how the economic gaps are to be filled.”

On Covid 19 Hosking has promoted a series of contradictory positions with the only common factor being that they are all anti Government.

Hosking is the Karma Sutra of New Zealand political reckons with an incredible number of rather strange positions.  The only predictable thing is that he will be pro National and anti Labour.  The only time he criticises National is when they are performing that badly it is clear they will lose.

Whether it is being too kind or not kind enough, too early or too late, or being too staunch or being too lax, the negative spin is so apparent and so toxic.

And yesterday when he and his wife managed to have totally contradictory and at the same time totally negative opinions on the Government was jarring.

And here is the thing.  When I look through the Covid statistics for countries I see spiking infection rates, stable infection rates, and infection rates for countries, like Australia, that managed to flatten the curve but are seeing a second wave happen.

And here in Aotearoa New Zealand I see a curve that has been flattened, trampled on, spat on, rucked over and buried.

And we have a border quarantine system that is holding up and detecting cases.  And a surge of returning kiwis wanting to escape the horrors of what is happening overseas.  And there is no sign of community spread even though extensive numbers of tests are being conducted.

We do need to have an important discussion about New Zealand’s future and how and why we maintain eradication.  And what we do with our economy.  Mike’s reckons are not helping that discussion.

49 comments on “The many and varied Covid reckons of Mike Hosking ”

  1. He wouldn't know ETHICS if one of them jumped up and bit him on the bum.

    All Mike is interested in is having people listen to him – look at me, look at me – so the ratings look good enough to justify the salary and benefits He demands.

    More fool His flock.

    Oh, and btw, Granny and Co are again hard at it trying to bring back Sir John. John Key this, JohnKey that, John Key would be happy to give the plastic lady a reference.

    • tc 1.1

      Nah it's all about the brand which Bridges and Bennet sullied so JK gets rolled out in his ambassadorial role as granny is an extension of brand national party.

      Key's not going back, way too many skeletons and the odious SCF which could still bite him if the political will existed.
      His hands up Luxon’s back now advising on such arts as plausible deniability, minimising parliamentary time and getting others to do your dirty work.

      • OnceWasTim 1.1.1

        Isn't about time we saw a biography of Sir John? "Moi Loif on the Global Stage through the Ages", by Nick Leeson, with a Forward by Peter Thiel. Available and exclusively on Amazon

        • Incognito 1.1.1.1

          Peter Thiel’s memoirs will be entitled “I Have Been Watching You”.

      • vto 1.1.2

        Yes… never forget South Canterbury Finance and the rort that Key and English inflicted on the RDGS to enable their constituents to recover their poorly considered investments after the fact…. to the tune of $1.7billion… the biggest ripoff this country has suffered.. at the hand of English and Key

        Bill English is a cheat who defrauded the taxpayer

        So is Key

        Never forget

  2. tc 2

    Essential reading for anyone who lives in Lala land and doesn't see the agenda in the MSM that the hosk, tawdry and all the other lackeys push.

    Its' not about looking after kiwis interests it's always been about the national party so given they're using taxpayer funds how's the wider public being served by all this BS and sowing of dissent.

    Time for public broadcasting as the private model serves its owners and not the people.

    • Heather Grimwood 2.1

      to tc@ 2 : absolutely ……has been needed for decades, but more so than ever
      as more and more rubbish or worse pervades our media.

  3. Incognito 3

    Micky read Mike. You took one for the team but you should have gone for the cartoon version for the un-thinking, which is much easier to follow.

    The list of Mike’s reckons is starting to look like BLiP’s list of lies.

    I like Karma Sutra laugh

    • One for the team indeed. Reminds me of the last lines of A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens:

      "It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done;"

      You’ve got a stronger stomach than me, Micky.

  4. Reality 4

    I think a few, maybe many, are starting to see through Hosking's contradictory irrational ravings. Even with some missteps, most people know that NZ has done pretty well compared with overseas. As has been said, there was no rule book for getting through this pandemic so thank you Jacinda.

    • I Feel Love 4.1

      I heard that the other day listening to work pals talking in staffroom, "that Hosking is all over the place", NZrs aren't stupid.

  5. Kay 5

    Yes, I can see why your head hurts sad

    • Incognito 5.1

      I thought it was those chickens again 😉

      • Kiwijoker 5.1.1

        I have it from an impeccable source that hoskings funds the Labour Party and has pics of Savage and Ardern over his bed.

        • Incognito 5.1.1.1

          Yeah, I think it’s time he finishes this charade and comes out. You can see his inner struggle and torment and it hurts to see him in so much pain. Kindness will cure him and Kate can swab him every time he’s been out and about.

        • Chris 5.1.1.2

          I like it when people call him 'Hoskings'. It's like John 'Keys'. Just a little bit wrong. It’s nice.

  6. RedLogix 6

    There's a difference between provocative and being a pseudo random click bait generator. Hosking stepped over that line a few years back.

  7. I Feel Love 7

    https://mobile.twitter.com/nz_voter/status/1275354116454182915 Woodhouse releases photo of homeless man (not sure if Twitter link works?)'

    • ianmac 7.1

      Poor old Mike. Homeless though secure in the National Home.

      Liked this comment from Glen McConnell re Paula:

      A lot of pressure on Paul Goldsmith now, as the only Māori MP in National's top 15.

  8. AB 8

    "On Covid 19 Hosking has promoted a series of contradictory positions with the only common factor being that they are all anti Government."

    That certainly. I also think he believes that whatever is irritating him on any given day deserves a public airing – long-term coherence doesn't come into it.

    • ianmac 8.1

      Perhaps not so much what irritates him, so much as how can he spin this to smear the Government.

      • peterh 8.1.1

        Hosk and his other half get on the wine at night,and by morning believe all the crap they have thought up

    • tc 8.2

      That's how talk back works …..outrage, over the top rhetoric and the whinging. Manufactured if not available freely as we've seen.
      All filtered, trimmed and delivered to the airwaves as a package.

  9. Dennis Frank 9

    Such an easy target, the hosk. Just to provide a bit of balance, here's something he wrote this morning that I agree with. It looks suspiciously like philosophy(!):

    politics is hopelessly broken, and it mostly ends badly

    https://www.nzherald.co.nz/politics/news/article.cfm?c_id=280&objectid=12344116

    • RedLogix 9.1

      politics is hopelessly broken

      Erratic and irresponsible fools like him being a large part of the problem. It's one thing to change your mind when new information compels it, but as Mickey has documented, the inconsistent, contradictory demands from this jumped up, over-entitled little twerp look more like the tantrums of a four year old than media commentary.

      • Dennis Frank 9.1.1

        Oh yes. I'm not dissenting from any of that. Just a question of balance. Seeing the good in someone doesn't mean denying the bad you see in them. It does provide a basis for a more balanced view, and that's all I intended…

        • RedLogix 9.1.1.1

          You are right, but honestly I've given up on straining my aging eyes looking for the good in the Hosk. The squint does not help the complexion.

      • Peter 9.1.2

        Hosking: "Politics is hopelessly broken."

        What chance a treatise on the solutions?

  10. esoteric pineapples 10

    I'm glad someone was smart enough to take that photo when the opportunity arose

  11. Peter 11

    Over years a number of times I've heard of Hosking's relentless positivity.

    For someone to be regarded as being relentlessly positive when the evidence suggests that they get out of bed every day with a, "What can I bitch and moan about and who can I get at today?" attitude, says a lot about his admirers.

  12. Byd0nz 12

    My head hurts just reading through this as well. If ever the word 'Bludger' should be inflicted on someone, it sure would be an apt description of the Hoskings, Big paypackets for pure drivel, nothing useful to give to the betterment of the world.

    Wheres the Panadol.

    • Kiwijoker 12.1

      Isn’t hoskings father in law one of our largest social welfare beneficiaries?

  13. Hosking-

    Big Mouth

    Small Brain

    And as lazy as hell, just a headline reader.

    • Just Is 13.1

      You forgot "small prick", often a contributing factor with for people like Hoskings

      • Halfcrown 13.1.1

        You are so right. Commonly known as Penis Inadequacy Sydrome (PIS) What they lack in size they make up with mouth and that is why he's so full of piss & wind.

  14. Leighton 14

    Great article. Just a clarification on MH's March 19 "reckon" – Although the headline refers to closing the borders this appears to be a sub-editor's error. The body of the column makes no specific mention of border closure. It goes much further than that and advocates a full lockdown of the kind which ultimately happened a week layer. It is clear that this is what MH is talking about from his reckon that "China has given us the answer". At that stage China had not closed its international borders but were in the midst of their stringent lockdown of Wuhan in particular.

  15. gsays 15

    If Darren Watson's Planet Key wasn't allowed to be seen or heard last election cycle, then surely it's OK for this clown to be out of sight and hearing until after the election.

    We can, at a later date post election, be told that it was not the right thing to do.

  16. Just Is 16

    I'm pretty sure Hoskings gets his style from Alan Jones, who made that infamous statement about Ardern, "the shove sock in it" which reportedly cost his employer $20M in lost advertising revenuefrom the outrage of critising a highly respected global leader, something Hoskings does nearly every day without any consequence from his employer or sponsers.

    They're both giant TURDS

  17. Halfcrown 17

    "Hosking is the Karma Sutra of New Zealand political reckons with an incredible number of rather strange positions."

    Ha ha ha I do like that.

    • Incognito 17.1

      Q: what do you get when you combine Karma with Kama Sutra? A: a sore back.

  18. Halfcrown 18

    Incognito @ 17.1

    I do like that as well It is great to see the intelligent wit on this site.

  19. Andre 19

    I miss "Like Mike".

  20. JohnSelway 20

    That photo at the header is fucking priceless

  21. Toni R 21

    That fact that Hosking used the word 'ethics' and 'National' in the same sentence shows his grasp on reality is tentative at best.

  22. Toni R 22

    BTW I love the Standard.

  23. Ken 23

    Perhaps the government should create a wealth tax specifically for that wanker.

  24. Draco T Bastard 24

    And I still say that spreading misinformation should be a crime. Especially considering that such misinformation about a deadly virus will lead to multiple deaths.

    Wonder how the hosk would react if he knew that his reckons could lead to charges of mass manslaughter. Or the TV directors considering that it was their decision to broadcast those reckons.

    • Just Is 24.1

      Draco, I'm inclined to agree with you, should fall under the advertising standards authority, media should be held accountable for the factual accuracy of the their reporting, failures to comply should result in significant fines as a deterrent on spreading Fake News, which seems to prevalent for the Nat fan club.

      Any story labeled Opinion should have a disclaimer stating that there are literally no facts and is written for the benefit of a specific group or party.

      Clickbait should made illegal.

  25. georgecom 25

    Hoskin is basically ABL – anyone but labour. So whatever the Government does he will moan about it and take a contrary view.

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