IF: A day in the life of Matthew Hooton

Written By: - Date published: 7:39 am, March 25th, 2014 - 32 comments
Categories: david cunliffe, helen clark, Satire, Shane Jones, winston peters - Tags: , , , , ,

IF Day in LifeScott Yorke at Imperator Fish generously allows us to repost his posts. In this case he has been performing satire at the expense of one of our more colourful commenters (at least I hope it is satire).

6:08 am

I had a dream last night, in which Shane Jones walked away from the Labour Party and became the leader of New Zealand First. Winston retired from politics and went on to set up a bird rescue centre in a remote spot in the Raukumura Range, but the centre was burned down after two teenagers high on glue broke in and set it alight. The delicious smells of hundreds of roasted native birds attracted the attentions of the poor for miles around, and before long there was a riot, as desperate and hungry people tore at each other to get into the still-burning sanctuary. Several people suffered severe burns, but everyone agreed that it was the best feast the East Coast had seen for years.

I awoke in a fever and ran to my computer, and in seconds flat I had my NBR column finished.

7:12 am

Checked my iPredict stocks. There doesn’t seem much appetite for a move by Winston into the bird sanctuary industry. Disappointing. Decided to rewrite my column to take that bit out.

7:47 am

Was reading the newspaper over breakfast, and then started to wonder what would happen if David Cunliffe decided to join the Internet Party. It could happen. Cunliffe hasn’t been reported as meeting with Dotcom at any time, which is itself suspicious. What is he hiding? Are they meeting in secret? Is a full Labour-Internet Party merger on the cards?

9: 31 am

Cunliffe’s refusal to fess up to secret meetings with Kim Dotcom is lying by omission. Therefore, David Cunliffe is a liar. I will make this point during my regular weekly slot on the radio today.

11:52 am

I don’t understand Mike Williams. He’s a wet leftie, and yet he keeps agreeing with everything I say. It may be time for some serious soul-searching. Have I lost my edge? Have I become soft and centrist in my old age? I have to pull myself together!

12:40 pm

I got back to my office, still feeling down and wondering who or what to believe. I didn’t like the way this felt. So I closed the door, leaned back in my chair, and thought about Helen Clark. The more I thought about Helen Clark the angrier I got. I remembered why I hate socialists so much, and I immediately felt much better. Let that wet leftie Mike Williams agree with me if he wants. It doesn’t mean I’ve gone soft. It just shows that I can deliver a devastating and convincing argument.

3: 07 pm

Was thinking about all the lies David Cunliffe must have told the people around him over the years. Like when he was a kid and lied to his parents about cleaning his room, or at University when he lied to his tutor when asked whether he’d read all the course materials.

And just think of all those everyday little lies we tell our children. Did David Cunliffe lie to his children about the existence of Santa Claus?

If I could just uncover some of those lies. Maybe Cameron can do some digging.

3:32 pm

I’m immensely intelligent, and I’m also right-wing. It’s no coincidence.

So how can someone as well educated as Cunliffe be a leftie? That’s the biggest lie of all.

4:43 pm

I rang Shane and asked if he was joining New Zealand First.

“Notwithstanding you prognostications, Matthew, I have no plans at this time to paddle myself over to another waka. I am enfolded in Labour’s loving arms, and in her embrace I will take my pleasure,” he said.

“Winston and I are old mates, etcetera, but this is pure mischief-making, as you well know.”

A denial is as good as confirmation. It’s on! Quick! To iPredict!

32 comments on “IF: A day in the life of Matthew Hooton”

  1. anker 1

    Very funny!

    Are you out there Matthew??? You should read this. I think it captures you very well!

  2. vto 2

    What gets me about people like Mr Hooton is the way they never remove their blinkers. They stick to their patter like a dogma. These conservatives really have limited use in society – and never for the purposes of good advancement.

    This can of course be seen throughout New Zealand history whereby persuasions from the left have taken the nation to new and better places, whereas persuasions from the right have never. They merely consolidate to themselves. The left is willing to consider the new and admit to wrong, the right never.

    Another example of this critter is the fence post srylands. Never a new thought, never a critical analysis.

    Yep, Mr Hooton is of very limited use. That use is consolidation to his own.

    Bloody useless.

    • George D 2.1

      Hooton is much smarter than the average person on the right, as his comments are designed to create perceptions rather than being literal statements of opinion. As such, it’s a surprise that anything he says is taken at face value.

    • rhinocrates 2.2

      No, Hoots, despite a racist bastard being something any decent person would scrape off their shoe, it is in fact useful. It is stupid enough to make its agenda obvious while trying to conceal it. What do the Nats WANT you to think? See Hoots. Then ask why.

  3. Ant 3

    The use of “etcetera” nails Jones. 😀

  4. logie97 4

    http://www.radionz.co.nz/national/programmes/ninetonoon/audio/2590034/politics-with-mike-williams-and-matthew-hooton

    About 19:30 minutes into the discussion, Hooton suddenly becomes almost apoplectic over Labour’s Forestry policy.

    Somehow paying for the importation of steel products trumps adding value to homegrown products.
    But then the likes of Mathew no longer see New Zealand Inc as belonging to kiwis but rather just an outpost for the multi-nationals.

  5. miravox 5

    Satire, huh? Rings true.

  6. Rodel 6

    Good satire.

    Must re-read ‘The Hollow Men’ Now that’s satire, isn’t it?

    Who said, ‘F*** we’re good!’ in an e-mail? in spite of Crosby Textor’s contrary view.

    • rhinocrates 6.1

      “Thick and full of himself” I believe is what even its clients say of it according to Hager, who is a “Commo cunt” (lady parts being shameful, apparently) according to Hoots. No likelihood of of an engagement being announced soon, I think.

  7. captain hook 7

    you missed the bit about his elevator shoes and his fake rolex.

  8. thechangeling 8

    Pretty damn funny. Love to see it on screen. Oh that’s right public broadcasting got decimated by the right so opposing points of view couldn’t be offered! The maniacs continue to rule.

  9. Tracey 9

    i saw a newspaper headline on the weekend which included these words

    ” new zealand inc.”

    we are a society of people not a corporation. our nation ought to have more in common with a family than a company. i despair.

    • rhinocrates 9.1

      Yes, it’s very very sad. Somehow thinking of NZ inc” is a form of machismo. Whatever happened to nationhood? There is a kind of patriotism that is not nationalism or jingoism, but a celebration of our community and diversity as a family, not an implicit demand – as “NZ inc” is – that we all be good little worker bees.

      The implication of “NZ inc” is that if you’re not “productive”, you’ll be made redundant and your position “outsourced”.

      • Tracey 9.1.1

        it’s also a de-humanising thing to use Inc.. A company has no face, no emotion, just a financially based bottom-line.

        this is business people, harden up or fail, and if you fail you only had yourself to blame.

        ” There is a kind of patriotism that is not nationalism or jingoism, but a celebration of our community and diversity as a family,” agree 100%

  10. lurgee 10

    “So how can someone as well educated as Cunliffe be a leftie? That’s the biggest lie of all.”

    Sometimes great truths are spoken in jest.

  11. rhinocrates 11

    It was OK getting Hoots’ personal nastiness, paranoia and disingenuousness, but it missed the deep current of racism and misogyny that it too frequently shows.

    • Populuxe1 11.1

      I’m not sure I’d call him walking out of JT and Willie’s roastbuster fiasco “misogyny” – quite the opposite in fact.

      • rhinocrates 11.1.1

        That was a calculated branding exercise designed to get maximum publicity – you need to look at its regular casual statements when it thinks that it’s being a comedian.

        • rhinocrates 11.1.1.1

          Hoots even tweeted it in advance. For that shit, rape is just an opportunity for self-promotion.

          • Populuxe1 11.1.1.1.1

            Whatever – smells like a vendeta to me. He’s not worth it.

            • fender 11.1.1.1.1.1

              ” He’s not worth it.”
              +1

              His disrespect for Kathryn Ryan when she attempts to get him to shut his shit-filled diatribe is a weekly illustration..

              • rhinocrates

                True, Hoots is a lying sack of shit… but what that Goebbels wannabe represents with its race-baiting is sinister and must be opposed, because if it’s allowed, even worse will follow.

                I’ve Jewish family and friends old enough to remember the Holocaust and Hoots and its friends at the Marlborough Sounds Symposia gave inspiration to Anders Brevik.

                Don’t underestimate these bastards, because one day it will be too late.

                • lurgee

                  “one day it will be too late”

                  You sound a bit like Brevik yourself there, with his Götterdämmerung fantasies.

                  I suggest you relax a bit and stop throwing around words like “Nazi” and “Holocaust.” To paraphrase your own comment, these atrocities are just an opportunity for besmirching someone for – shock! Horror! – not sharing your political opinions.

                  • rhinocrates

                    OK, show where I sound like Brevik please.

                    Show where I always prefix “Maori” with “dumb”, “stupid” and “greedy” like Hoots. Show where I’ve inspired mass murder.

                    Say “It can’t happen here” and read a bit of NZ history.

                    Damn right I don’t agree with Hoots’ political opinions, because they are vile. I’m not embarrassed to hate evil.

                    Hoots is trying to make racism mainstream. That is evil.

                    I know that some liberal hypocrites like Russell Brown will “give him a hearing” because it flatters them and is never nasty to them personally and will behave at dinner parties, but that means nothing.

                    Also, I will not relax and you can go and fuck yourself. Sorry about that.

                    You’ve rightly named yourself after a general term for disease.

                    • lurgee

                      “OK, show where I sound like Brevik please”

                      I did. He fantasised about a future where Europe had been over-run by the verminous hordes of Islamist savages. You’re “Don’t underestimate these bastards, because one day it will be too late” is in a similar vein, given your hysterical blethering about “Holocausts” and “Nazis” and your desperate need to demonize people who disagree with you.

                      “Show where I always prefix “Maori” with “dumb”, “stupid” and “greedy” like Hoots. Show where I’ve inspired mass murder.”

                      Did I say you did?

                      You are seriously claiming Hooton always prefixes dumb / stupid / greedy to ‘Maori’? Really? Every single time?

                      Go and lie down, you nincompoop.

                      Incidentally, my ID is inspired by a song on Radiohead’s first album. Showing my age, I suppose.

                    • rhinocrates

                      I did. He fantasised about a future where Europe had been over-run by the verminous hordes of Islamist savages.

                      Whereas HISTORY shows that Europe was indeed overrun by racist savages from the supposedly most “civilised” culture. Your own language says a lot about you – a lot more than you intended. “Verminous”? Really? Is that what springs to mind?

                      This is not a “disagreement” as you so disingenuously and euphemistically put it. Opposition to racism is not a “disagreement” as if one side or the other were equally viable. It is a fundamental abhorrence of evil. The fact that you choose to reduce it to that speaks volumes.

                      Every single time?

                      Oh for fuck’s sake.. Strategically. OK, you’ll find a time that it doesn’t. Big fucking deal. It does that when it calculates that it will have a dog whistle effect. Don’t play lawyer with me, nit-picking. You know exactly what I mean and you’re looking for a loophole.

                      Go and lie down, you nincompoop.

                      “Nincompoop”? How quaint. How about “rapscallion”?

                      Sorry, I don’t take your commands. Funny how people won’t do that, eh?

                      Incidentally, my ID is inspired by a song on Radiohead’s first album. Showing my age, I suppose.

                      Gosh, how interesting that isn’t.

                      [Click to Edit | Delete] (7 minutes and 25 seconds)

                    • rhinocrates

                      Go and lie down, you nincompoop.

                      Oh come on, please.

                      I can take “fucking arsehole”, “bastard”, “idiot”, “Barry Manilow fan” and even “accountant”.

                      Try harder for my own amusement, please. Mwah, mwah xxxx, I miss you.

                    • lurgee

                      “Whereas HISTORY shows that Europe was indeed overrun by racist savages from the supposedly most “civilised” culture. Your own language says a lot about you – a lot more than you intended. “Verminous”? Really? Is that what springs to mind?”

                      When I am describing Brevik’s thought processes, yes. That’s how he imagined the future.

                      Now stop being silly. You’re beginning to sound quite distraught. As I said, lie down. Ninny.

                      “This is not a “disagreement” as you so disingenuously and euphemistically put it. Opposition to racism is not a “disagreement” as if one side or the other were equally viable. It is a fundamental abhorrence of evil. The fact that you choose to reduce it to that speaks volumes.”

                      You’re taking Hooton’s racism as a proven thing. Given the evidence seems to consist of your rather imaginative recollection of his past utterances, I’ll regaurd that with some scepticism, until you can actually provide actual evidence of his supposed ‘racism.’

                      Your portrayal of Hooton strikes me as a rather unflattering, unintentional self portrait. You call him a “Goebbels wannabe” with a sinister agenda but your continual abuse of another human being (over of some things you admit you kinda made up him saying) show you are the real “Goebbels wannabe,” heaping the abuse on the untermensch, the not human “lying sack of shit.” It’s hate speech, just as the ravings of the historical Goebbels was hate speech. He would recognise it and nod approvingly.

                    • rhinocrates

                      Hello Disease.

                      “That’s how he imagined the future.”

                      Then you have a remarkably vivid and oddly precise imagination.

                      “Your portrayal of Hooton strikes me as a rather unflattering, unintentional self portrait. blah blah blah wibble wibble”

                      Ah, now who’s showing “rather imaginative recollection” Doctor Lurgee? What medical school did you go to again? The same one as Shearer?

                      “Evidence of racism”

                      Okaaaay, it’s inability to write “Maori” without prefixing it with “stupid” or “dumb”. Yes of course you can find instances where your idol hasn’t done that and merely implied it. Have fun. Knock yourself out.

                      “As I said, lie down. Ninny.”

                      And as for the last paragraph, someone is definitely distraught judging by that hyperbole.

                      Sorry, I don’t respect your authoritah and you’re not even Cartman.

                      By the way, Hoots is already married.

                      Bored trolling you. Time for breakfast.

  12. captain hook 12

    and now its off to anger management class. the doc says if I dont get my temper under control then I might blow a fuse.

  13. Robert M 13

    Who is Mathew Hooton. Apparently he went to Kings, prep, Kings and then finished his secondary ed at Grammar in the last yrs of John Graham. After two years at Auckland uni he dropped out, and went off on the backpacker circuit in Europe. Encountering Auckland Bull farmer, single and fanatical pro nuke advocate , Lockwood Smith, he returned to NZ as a junior officer in the Richardson/ Shipley Nat govt. Hooton was a staunch advocate of bulk funding, strongly supported, I admit, by mother a former secondary teacher, ( but then again my mother was the single enthusiast for Uptons charging at the desk for basic hospital operations) but also most of the later primary school headmasters I attended TBHS with ( ie Hawkey, Poulter). I have always found it difficult to understand why Hooton was so enthusiastic about pudding basic No 9 haircut Ruth Richardson and so full of contempt for Shipley who was the one National MP who actually wanted to develop NZ as a modern western cosmopolitan nation, ie she put cafe and Courtenay Place bar strips down every provincial city in NZ, plus brothels and strip joints. I did attend National Party meetings at the time, against the extreme hostility of the Studholme aristocracy, who regarded Guy Salmon as tolerable, but recommended I just go back to Labour. Any National member, vote or even Stuart Boag who selected me for say a National conference, was overidden by the usual Turner ( Raymond chair). To most local Nat business/ farmer people the Shipley govt was loathed in the provinces, probably because the money was going to all the wrong people, bohemians, not them.
    The fact that the leading Brash advisors Keenan , Sinclair were probably accurate that Hooton was ‘mad” and essentially useless, and he was rapidly removed as a Brash speechwriter. I was of course as equally appalled by the Basic Brash speech, branding the Maoris as uneducated criminals and calling for locking up again all crims and those with mental illness. The Brash appeal was a direct appeal to the thick deevolved white vote in Auckland and the provinces, ie the low paid, SC failures in Auckland with 5 generations of failure in life, business and education, who mainly gain employment in state enterprises , of a generally punative and revenge type.
    Hooton blames Hager and the betrayal of English and Smith for the defeat of Brash , which is true enough, but it is difficult to see Brash holding together a neo liberal market reform govt for more than 6 months. At the personal level Brash lacked the political skills or necessary viciousness to do the job. My view was that Brash would have had no interest in supporting the US in terms of equipment and troops at the foreign policy level and was as much a ‘bleeding heart liberal as Marshall or his father, ie someone who would have been prepared to fight Muldoon and Holyoake inthe streets if Rob had achieved his wish to dispatch the 11 RNZAF B66 Canberra’s for bombing missions in Vietnam attached ot RAAF squadrons of older Canberra’s in the Central Highlands.
    For these and other reasons , I went to the Green meeting at the Avon Loop, Holiday Inn were I personally offered Jeanette Fitzimons my full support to defeat Brash. I covered my Avon Loop flat with Green posters and pictures of a Gearing destroyer firing a live nucler Asroc in 1962. I voted the full green ticket, I wasn’t going to vote for Tim Barnett.
    Their is no wiki for Hooton, presumably he has erased it, or is insig. Can you provide me with your bio , version for Hooton, as Auckland’s power hirerarchy is still difficult to decipher, although I suspect he is far less class than me.

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    Property developers think there is an "oversupply" of houses in Auckland:High turnover rates and falling prices may be a sign that there are too many new houses going in to some parts of Auckland, commentators say. [...] Property developer David Whitburn said there was a "bit of an oversupply" in ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    7 days ago
  • Australia to Pacific: “Fuck you, you can all drown”
    World leaders are meeting in New York in two weeks for the 2019 Climate Action Summit, where they are expected to announce new and more ambitious targets to stop the world from burning. But the Australian Prime Minister won't be there, despite being in the USA at the time:Scott Morrison ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    7 days ago
  • Implausible ignorance
    Labour Party president Nigel Haworth resigned yesterday over the party's sexual assault scandal. But while that's good news, its unlikely to take away the stench of a coverup. Because according to Paula Bennett in Parliament yesterday, pretty much everyone in the Prime Minister's office was involved as well:I have been ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    7 days ago
  • Labour’s Fatal Flaw.
     Two-Faced? Labour insiders' commitment to the neoliberal status quo puts them at odds with their party’s membership; its trade union affiliates; and a majority of Labour voters, but this only serves to strengthen the perception they have of themselves as a special elite. Among the lesser breeds, they’ll talk up a ...
    7 days ago
  • Ten reasons the Tories do NOT want an election
    There has been a lot of talk about Boris Johnson wanting an election, and he has blustered with great gusto about 'chicken' Jeremy Corbyn refusing one, but I think there are many reasons why he is secretly glad he has been refused the opportunity:The Tories are an utter rabble,tearing themselves ...
    1 week ago
  • Prorogation Illegal, rule Scottish judges
    Scottish appeal court judges have declared that Boris Johnson’s decision to suspend parliament in the run-up to the October Brexit deadline is unlawful. The three judges, chaired by Lord Carloway, Scotland’s most senior judge, overturned an earlier ruling that the courts did not have the powers to interfere in the prime ...
    1 week ago
  • Let me explain what I meant by Everyday New Zealanders
    By Simon Bridges. The following is a press release from the office of Simon Bridges, leader of The National Party. Key ora, New Zealand. Happy Maori Language Week. Look, I’m writing to you today because I want to clear something up. There’s been a lot of kerfuffle around some things ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    1 week ago
  • Yes, the SIS is subject to the Public Records Act
    I understand there's some stuff going round about how the SIS "was removed from the list of public offices covered by the Public Records Act in 2017". The context of course being their records derived from US torture, which will be disposed of or sealed. The good news is that ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • An evidence-based discussion of the Canadian fluoride/IQ study
    Dr. Christopher Labos and Jonathan Jarry discuss the recent Canadian fluoride/IQ research. They provide an expert analysis of the paper and its problems. Click on image to go to podcast. The critical debate about the recent ...
    1 week ago
  • Climate Change: Australia in denial
    Australia is burning down again, and meanwhile its natural disaster minister is denying climate change:Australia’s minister responsible for drought and natural disasters, David Littleproud, has said that he doesn’t “know if climate change is manmade”. Clarifying earlier comments that the question is “irrelevant” when considering the Coalition government’s response to ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Philippines activist speaking on the Duterte tyranny
    Auckland Philippines Solidarity is excited to host Professor Judy Taguiwalo for a speaking tour of NZ in September. She is a well-known activist in the Philippines and was a political prisoner under the Marcos dictatorship. Professor Taguiwalo briefly served as a Cabinet member under President Duterte but was forced from ...
    RedlineBy Daphna
    1 week ago
  • Disgust
    I have no special insights to offer on the Labour sexual assault coverup. All I have is disgust. Disgust that an organisation could fail its people so badly. Disgust that they punished the victims rather than the perpetrator. Disgust that its party hacks are apparently blaming the victims for demanding ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Speak Up for Women calls out Greens’ censorship
    This open letter to the Green Party was penned after an opinion piece by Jill Abigail, a feminist and founding member of the party, was censored by the Greens’ leadership. (Redline has reprinted her article here).The intolerance of the Green Party leaders and their acceptance of the misogyny of gender ...
    RedlineBy Daphna
    1 week ago
  • Member’s Day: End of Life Choice, part 3
    Today is a Member's day, and David Seymour's End of Life Choice Bill continues its slow crawl through its committee stage. They're spending the whole day on it today, though the first hour is likely to be spent on voting left over from last time. After that they'll move on ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Flight to Los Angeles turned back after passengers decide they don’t want to go anymore
    An ambitious plan to fly to Los Angeles petered out into a brief sight-seeing trip and a desire to return home and get some sleep before work tomorrow. Air New Zealand has confirmed a flight to Los Angeles last night was turned back about a quarter of the way into ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    1 week ago
  • Indigenous Futures: defuturing and futuring – an analytical framework for policy development?
    There appears to be consensus – by omission – that the concept of indigenous futures should be accepted at face value. So I scavenged the internet to see if I could locate an academic descriptor or a framework around how we think about it as a concept, and whether it ...
    EllipsisterBy Ellipsister
    1 week ago
  • Cadbury rumoured to be releasing the Pineapple Trump
    Here’s another novelty chocolate to shove in your gob, New Zealand Cadbury could be seeking to make itself great again with a rumoured new release: Pineapple Trumps, a spin on its classic chocolate-encased pineapple treat and do-it-yourself tooth remover. The global confectionery manufacturer and bumbling “before” character in an infomercial, ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    1 week ago
  • The coming resource war.
    During my time in the Pentagon I had the privilege of sitting down with military leaders and defence and security officials from a variety of Latin American nations. Sometimes I was present as a subordinate assistant to a senior US defence department official, sometimes as part of a delegation that ...
    KiwipoliticoBy Pablo
    1 week ago
  • Māori Language Week with The Civilian
    Kia ora, Aotearoa. It’s that magical time of year. Te Wiki o te Reo Māori. In English, the week that frightens talk radio. As you probably know by now, all your favourite media outlets are participating, some more successfully than others. Stuff has changed its name to Puna for the ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    1 week ago
  • Will Horizons act on climate change?
    Local body elections are coming up next month. And it looks like all Palmerston North candidates for Horizons (the Manawatu-Whanganui Regional Council) want to take action on climate change:Climate change is set to be a key issue in Palmerston North for the next three years if those wanting to get ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • BORA reform is stalled
    Eighteen months ago, the government promised to strengthen the Bill of Rights Act, by explicitly affirming the power of the courts to issue declarations of inconsistency and requiring Parliament to formally respond to them. So how's that going? I was curious, so I asked for all advice about the proposal. ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Corbyn and Brexit
    As the Brexit saga staggers on, the focus is naturally enough on the Prime Minister and his attempts to achieve Brexit “do or die”. But the role played by the Leader of the Opposition is of almost equal interest and complexity. The first problem for Jeremy Corbyn is that he ...
    Bryan GouldBy Bryan Gould
    1 week ago
  • A ditch for him to die in
    Last week, English Prime Minister Boris Johnson boldly declared that he would rather die be dead in a ditch than delay Brexit. Unfortunately for him, the UK parliament accepted the challenge, and promptly dug one for him. The "rebellion bill" requires him to ask for and secure yet another temporary ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Warning! Warning! Danger Jacinda Ardern! Danger Marama Davidson! Warning!
    Lost In Political Space: The most important takeaway from this latest Labour sexual assault scandal, which (if I may paraphrase Nixon’s White House counsel’s, John Dean’s, infamous description of Watergate) is “growing like a cancer” on the premiership, is the Labour Party organisation’s extraordinary professional paralysis in the face of ...
    1 week ago
  • Union solidarity with Ihumatao land occupation
    by Daphna Whitmore Every Sunday for the past two months unionists from First Union, with supporters from other unions, have set out to the Ihumatao land protest, put up gazebos and gas barbeques, and cooked food for a few hundred locals and supporters who have come from across the country. ...
    RedlineBy Daphna
    1 week ago
  • Climate Change: The wrong kind of trees?
    Newsroom today has an excellent, in-depth article on pine trees as carbon sinks. The TL;DR is that pine is really good at soaking up carbon, but people prefer far-less efficient native forests instead. Which is understandable, but there's two problems: firstly, we've pissed about so long on this problem that ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • No freedom of speech in Turkey
    Canan Kaftancioglu is a Turkish politician and member of the opposition Republican People's Party (CHP). Like most modern politicians, she tweets, and uses the platform to criticise the Turkish government. She has criticised them over the death of a 14-year-old boy who was hit by a tear gas grenade during ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Speaker: Tadhg Stopford: Why I’m standing for the ADHB
    Hi there, just call me Tim.We face tough problems, and I’d like to help, because there are solutions.An Auckand District Health Board member has nominated me for as a candidate for the ADHB, because her MS-related pain and fatigue is reduced with hemp products from Rotorua.  Nothing else helped her. If I ...
    1 week ago
  • Good little vassals
    The Inspector-General of Intelligence and Security has published their report on whether the SIS and GCSB had any complicity in American torture. And its damning. The pull quote is this:The Inquiry found both agencies, but to a much greater degree, the NZSIS, received many intelligence reports obtained from detainees who, ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    1 week ago
  • Who Shall We Turn To When God, And Uncle Sam, Cease To Defend New Zealand?
    Bewhiskered Cassandra? Professor Hugh White’s chilling suggestion, advanced to select collections of academic, military and diplomatic Kiwi experts over the course of the past week, is that the assumptions upon which Australia and New Zealand have built their foreign affairs and defence policies for practically their entire histories – are ...
    1 week ago
  • The Politics of Opposition
    For most of the time I was a British MP, my party was out of government – these were the Thatcher years, when it was hard for anyone else to get a look-in. As a front-bencher and shadow minister, I became familiar with the strategies required in a parliamentary democracy ...
    Bryan GouldBy Bryan Gould
    1 week ago
  • More expert comments on the Canadian fluoride-IQ paper
    The Green et al (2019) fluoride/IQ is certainly controversial – as would be expected from its subject (see If at first you don’t succeed . . . statistical manipulation might help and Politics of science – making a silk purse out of a sow’s ear). Anti-fluoride campaigners have been actively promoting it ...
    1 week ago
  • The return to guerrilla war in Colombia
    by Gearóid Ó Loingsigh On August 29th a video in which veteran FARC (Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia) commander Iván Márquez announced that they had taken up arms again was released. There was no delay in the reaction to it, from longtime Liberal Party figure and former president Uribe, for ...
    RedlineBy Admin
    2 weeks ago
  • Air New Zealand identifies this enormous plot of unused land as possible second airport site
    Air New Zealand couldn’t believe its luck that this seemingly ideal piece of real estate had so far gone entirely unnoticed. Air New Zealand’s search for a site to build a second Auckland Airport may have made a breakthrough this afternoon, after employees scanning Google satellite imagery spotted a huge, ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    2 weeks ago
  • Redline on the Labour Party
    No-one on the anti-capitalist left in this country today puts forward a case that Labour is on the side of the working class.  There are certainly people who call themselves ‘socialist’ who do, but they are essentially liberals with vested interests in Labourism – often for career reasons. Nevertheless, there ...
    RedlineBy Admin
    2 weeks ago
  • New Fisk
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Labour’s failure
    When National was in government and fucking over the poor for the benefit of the rich, foodbanks were a growth industry. And now Labour is in charge, nothing has changed: A huge demand for emergency food parcels means the Auckland City Mission is struggling to prepare for the impending arrival ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Ardern attempts to vaccinate Clarke Gayford live on television to prove that it’s safe
    Gayford, pictured here on The Project, before things got wildly out of control. A bold public relations move by the Government to encourage parents to vaccinate their children has gone horribly wrong. Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern appeared on tonight’s episode of Three’s The Project, where the plan was for her ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    2 weeks ago
  • Has Mr. Whippy gone too far by parking on our front lawns?
    Mr. Whippy’s business model has driven it down a dark road of intimidation. Residents in major centres around the country are becoming disgruntled by the increasingly aggressive actions of purported ice cream company Mr. Whippy, who have taken to parking on people’s front lawns and doorsteps in a desperate attempt ...
    The CivilianBy admin
    2 weeks ago
  • Cleaning up the water
    Today the government released its Action Plan for Healthy Waterways, aimed at cleaning up our lakes and rivers. Its actually quite good. There will be protection for wetlands, better standards for swimming spots, a requirement for continuous improvement, and better standards for wastewater and stormwater. But most importantly, there's a ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Fronting up
    Today I appeared before the Environment Committee to give an oral submission on the Zero Carbon Bill. Over 1,500 people have asked to appear in person, so they've divided into subcommittees and are off touring the country, giving people a five minute slot each. The other submitters were a mixed ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    2 weeks ago
  • Politics of science – making a silk purse out of a sow’s ear
    Anti-fluoride activists have some wealthy backers – they are erecting billboards misrepresenting the Canadian study on many New Zealand cities – and local authorities are ordering their removal because of their scaremongering. Many New Zealanders ...
    2 weeks ago

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