web analytics

Mark Richardson for National leader!

Written By: - Date published: 11:08 am, May 19th, 2020 - 27 comments
Categories: humour, national, same old national, Satire, Simon Bridges, uncategorized - Tags: ,

Here at the Standard we do not normally offer advice to the National Party.  Well we do but we do not expect them to take it seriously.  But on this occasion as National faces annihilation in the next election we wish to endorse recent comments made by Michelle Boag.  She may be slightly crazy and think that there have been 18 Covids before the current one but on this we can agree.

Mark Richardson becoming National leader would be the best thing for New Zealand.

This is what Boag said:

Actually Mark would be fantastic … Mark would probably get us up to 40 percent overnight. I’d back you. Trouble is, you are not in the caucus… But you could be, just not on these numbers.”

I am not so confident about the increase in National’s polling.  Already they have maxed out the old rich white guy vote.

But he would ensure that Jacinda was Prime Minister for as long as she wanted.  Because every debate would end in variations of this:

And it would mean that Simon Bridges remained leader in the meantime.

Can I urge National to give serious consideration to this?  They might have to helicopter him into Epsom but it is not as if they have not done this sort of thing before.

27 comments on “Mark Richardson for National leader! ”

  1. Nick 1

    Hell yeah. Winner winner, chicken dinner.
    That steely eyed sneer.

  2. I'm sure his tenants will vote for him.

  3. Incognito 3

    I know he’s a shocking jock, but is he lucky?

  4. newsense 4

    Don't laugh too hard. He'd be more popular than some, has at least an equal profile to Bridges and had an intent to be in politics.

    According to Matthew Hooton, Nicki Kaye should see herself as an auxiliary to Muller's ambitions – Muller, with Kaye by his side.

    • Gabby 4.1

      What does Hootie Blowhard see as Todg Munter's primary virtues I wonder.

      • Tricledrown 4.1.1

        Toad mulehead recommended by Hooton .political analysts want to be relevant ie svengali like.But Hooton is past his prime and is the same mould as Bridges a try hard blowhard.

    • woodart 4.2

      kaye seems too compassionate for nats, would like to see her jump ship to nzfirst, win electorate ,and give nz politics a rev up. jacinda as p.m. nikki leader of opposition, nats third biggest party in parliament. pay good money for that…

  5. Peter 5

    RNZ in the weekend at 6.00 has stories for kids. Being read out, acted out, played out.

    This morning in bed more than half asleep I put the radio on and thought I was there. But it wasn't Badjelly, or Flick the Fire Engine though. Came to a bit more and realised the childishness was Mark Richardson.

    He'd be out of his depth in a photo of the reflection of swimming pool. Parliament? Yeah, make him National leader.

  6. peterh 6

    He would get hosking on board what a team at least 5%

  7. Adrian 7

    He's a very bad fit to be leader of National because he can take the piss out of himself , an ability that gives a hint of self awareness. So no, thats an instant fail in that job interview.

  8. mac1 8

    Wikepedia described Mark Richardson's career thus. "His dour approach to batting ………….. provided vital stability to New Zealand's batting order at a time when they were notorious for collapses."

    Once Bridges is given the umpirical finger by the National selectors, Richardson is a natural replacement. His test batting average is what National's polling used to be at 44%, and his test bowling average of 22% is what National polled in 2002. He received the umpires' upraised finger 62 times in test cricket but he is best known for the wagging finger he received from the Leader of the Opposition, as she was then, for his insouciantly stupid question at election time in 2017. His ability at question time would be no worse than his predecessor should he replace Simon Bridges in turn as Leader of the Opposition.

    All in all, a fine substitute, worthy of a National Party prone to collapses. His dour approach will be no different from Bridges and his experience as a sports commentator interviewing losing team captains will stand him in good stead on election nights.

  9. There is nothing like a big dose of humour.

    Just look at Richardson when he speaks, he has a bitterness about him most of the time.

    He would go down like a lead balloon.

    Bring him on please.

  10. commenters having fun with one of his unhinged rants…

  11. Ffloyd 11

    You lost me at ‘Michelle Boag thinks’

  12. mosa 12

    Sorry Mark who ????

  13. RedBaronCv 13

    Perhaps Nact could swipe a Green policy. "And we give you 'drumroll' our joint leaders Mark & Michelle"

  14. Gabby 14

    Who does Luxie want to warm his seat? Has nobody thought to ask?

    • Chris 14.1

      The nats have gone off Luxon. He'll be a loyal MP but Muller's now the man they think can relate to everyday kiwis.

  15. Tricledrown 15

    Replace a big dick with a bigger Dick

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

  • Social cohesion programme to address incitement of hatred and discrimination
    The Government is launching a significant programme of work to strengthen social cohesion in New Zealand and create a safer, more inclusive society. The work is part of the wider response to recommendations from the Royal Commission of Inquiry into the terrorist attack on Christchurch masjidain (mosques), and builds on ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 hours ago
  • Pause on Quarantine Free Travel from New South Wales extended
    The pause on Quarantine Free Travel from New South Wales to New Zealand will continue for a further 12 days, COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins says.  There are now 36 recent community cases of COVID-19 in New South Wales – including four not yet linked to the existing outbreak that ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    17 hours ago
  • Speech to the ASEAN-New Zealand Business Council
    ASEAN-New Zealand Business Council, Auckland  Ladies and Gentlemen, Distinguished Guests, Kia ora koutou katoa Thank you Kenneth for your kind introduction, and for the opportunity to speak this evening. Business councils make an important contribution to fostering trade and connections, and in providing practical advice to governments.  I want to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    18 hours ago
  • Address to the INZBC 7th International Summit 2021
    Day 2, India New Zealand Business Council 7th International Summit, Auckland (speech delivered virtually) Tēnā koutou katoa, Namaste, Sat sri akal, Assalamualaikum  Good morning and good evening to you all, Thank you for this opportunity to be with you virtually today. The India New Zealand Business Council has put together ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    19 hours ago
  • Government commits $4 million additional support for flood-affected Canterbury farmers
    Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern today announced the Government is injecting a further $4 million into relief funding to support flood-affected Canterbury farmers who are recovering from the damage of a historic one in 200 year flood. An additional $100,000 will also be provided to the Mayoral Relief Fund to support ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    24 hours ago
  • Appointment of Queen’s Counsel
    Attorney-General David Parker today announced the appointments of 10 Queen’s Counsel.   The newly appointed Silks are:   Auckland – Lynda Kearns, Stephen McCarthy, Ronald Mansfield, Alan (Fletcher) Pilditch, Davey Salmon, Laura O’Gorman  Wellington – Greg Arthur, Michael Colson, Victoria Heine  Christchurch – Kerryn Beaton   “The criteria for appointment recognise that ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Prime Minister congratulates victorious Black Caps
    Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has congratulated Kane Williamson and the Black Caps for their victory over India in the final of the inaugural Cricket World Test Championship. “The Black Caps have made New Zealand proud. This was a masterful performance from a team at the top of their game and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Further action to tackle cervical cancer
    Parliament has taken another step to help reduce the number of women who develop cervical cancer, with the Health (National Cervical Screening Programme) Amendment Bill passing its third reading. “I am very pleased by the robust consideration this Bill has received. It will ensure technology allows healthcare providers to directly ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • $500 million seized from gangs and criminals
    A significant Government milestone has been reached with $500 million in cash and assets seized from gangs and criminals by Police over the past four years, Police Minister Poto Williams announced today. “During our last term in office, this target was set for 2021 with Police as part of our ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Congratulations to the Black Caps – World Champions
    Minister of Sport and Recreation Grant Robertson has congratulated the Black Caps as the deserved winners of the inaugural World Test Cricket Championship. “The Black Caps have pulled off a remarkable and deserved win in the World Test Championship final against India.  The final is the culmination of two years ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Alert Level 2 in Wellington, Wairarapa and Kāpiti Coast
    Alert Level 2 measures are now in place for Wellington, Wairarapa and Kāpiti Coast to the north of Ōtaki, COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins says. These measures are precautionary, following the potential exposure of New Zealanders to a COVID-19 case from Sydney. The person visited a range of locations in ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Speech to the India New Zealand Business Council Summit
    5pm, Wednesday 23 June 2021 [CHECK AGAINST DELIVERY] Tuia te Rangi e tū nei Tuia te Papa e takoto nei Tuia te here tangata Ka rongo te pō, ka rongo te Ao Tihei Mauri Ora   Introduction Namaskar, tēnā koe and good evening. Thank you for your kind invitation to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Financial support for caregivers widened
    Children’s Minister Kelvin Davis has welcomed changes that will make it easier for caregivers looking after children outside of the state care system to access much-needed financial assistance. The Social Security (Financial Assistance for Caregivers) Amendment Bill will also allow these caregivers to access further benefits previously unavailable to them. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Agencies to have powers to secure maritime domain
    A Bill introduced to Parliament today aims to prevent serious criminal offending at sea, including transnational offending and organised crime, Foreign Minister Nanaia Mahuta announced. “Aotearoa New Zealand will be better placed to keep our maritime environment secure against threats like drugs trafficking, wildlife trafficking and human trafficking with the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Critical support for New Zealand’s budding researchers
    Fellowships to attract and retain talented researchers in the early stages of their career, have been awarded to 30 New Zealanders, Associate Research, Science and Innovation Minister Dr Ayesha Verrall announced today. “I am pleased to congratulate these researchers, who will be receiving funding through the MBIE Science Whitinga Fellowship. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Bill to stop taxpayers having to fund oil field decommissions
    The Government is preventing taxpayers picking up the bill for the decommissioning of oil fields, says Energy and Resource Minister Dr Megan Woods.  “After the Crown had to take responsibility for decommissioning the Tui oil field, it became clear to me that the current requirements around decommissioning are inadequate and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 days ago
  • Quarantine Free Travel from New South Wales to New Zealand to pause
    New Zealand’s Quarantine Free Travel from New South Wales to New Zealand will be paused while the source of infection of new cases announced in Sydney is investigated, says COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins. There are 10 new community cases of COVID-19 today in New South Wales, taking the Australian ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Milestone reached for Iwi Affiliation Population Counts
    Iwi affiliation data released today provides updated population counts for all iwi and addresses gaps in Māori data originating from the 2018 Census, says Associate Minister of Statistics Meka Whaitiri. “The release of the 2018 Iwi Affiliation Estimated Counts is a really important step, and I acknowledge the hard work ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Ngāti Rangitihi Claims Settlement Bill passes first reading
    Treaty of Waitangi Negotiations Minister Andrew Little welcomed Ngāti Rangitihi to Parliament today to witness the first reading of The Ngāti Rangitihi Claims Settlement Bill. “I know it took a lot of hard work, time and patience by all parties involved to reach this significant milestone. I am honoured to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Speech to the Sustainable Healthcare and Climate Health Conference Aotearoa
    Mihi Tēnā tātou katoa Kei ngā pou o te whare hauora ki Aotearoa, kei te mihi. Tēnā koutou i tā koutou pōwhiri mai i ahau. E mihi ana ki ngā taura tangata e hono ana i a tātou katoa, ko te kaupapa o te rā tērā. Tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Infrastructure Acceleration Fund opening for business
    Criteria to access at least $1 billion of the $3.8 billion Housing Acceleration Fund (HAF), announced in March, is now available, and an invitation for expressions of interest will be released on 30 June, Housing Minister Megan Woods has announced.  “This is a key milestone in our plan to accelerate ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Bringing back the health of Hauraki Gulf
    New marine protection areas and restrictions on fishing are among a raft of changes being put in place to protect the Hauraki Gulf for future generations. The new strategy, Revitalising the Gulf – Government action on the Sea Change Plan, released today, draws on input from mana whenua, local communities, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Speech to AI Forum – Autonomous Weapons Systems
    AI Forum New Zealand, Auckland Good evening and thank you so much for joining me this evening. I’d like to start with a thank you to the AI Forum Executive for getting this event off the ground and for all their work and support to date. The prospect of autonomous ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • New Zealand boosts support to Fiji for COVID-19 impact
    Aotearoa New Zealand is providing additional support to Fiji to mitigate the effects of the current COVID-19 outbreak on vulnerable households, Foreign Minister Hon Nanaia Mahuta announced today. “Recognising the increasingly challenging situation in Fiji, Aotearoa will provide an additional package of assistance to support the Government of Fiji and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Round 2 of successful energy education fund now open
    $1.65 million available in Support for Energy Education in Communities funding round two Insights from SEEC to inform future energy hardship programmes Community organisations that can deliver energy education to households in need are being invited to apply for the second funding round of the Support for Energy Education in ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • New Ngarimu scholarships to target vocational training
    Associate Education Minister Kelvin Davis today announced three new scholarships for students in vocational education and training (VET) are to be added to the suite of prestigious Ngarimu scholarships. “VET learners have less access to study support than university students and this is a way to tautoko their learning dreams ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Recognising the volunteers who support our health system
    Nominations have opened today for the 2021 Minister of Health Volunteer Awards, as part of National Volunteer Week. “We know that New Zealanders donate at least 159 million hours of volunteer labour every year,” Minister of Health Andrew Little said in launching this year’s awards in Wellington. “These people play ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Drug Free Sport supported to deal with new doping challenges
    Drug Free Sport New Zealand will receive a funding boost to respond to some of the emerging doping challenges across international sport. The additional $4.3 million over three years comes from the Sport Recovery Fund announced last year. It will help DFSNZ improve athletes’ understanding of the risks of doping, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Government support for South Auckland community hit by tornado
    The Government is contributing $100,000 to a Mayoral Relief Fund to support Auckland communities impacted by the Papatoetoe tornado, Acting Minister for Emergency Management Kris Faafoi says. “My heart goes out to the family and friends who have lost a loved one, and to those who have been injured. I ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Celebrating World Refugee Day
    World Refugee Day today is an opportunity to celebrate the proud record New Zealanders have supporting and protecting refugees and acknowledge the contribution these new New Zealanders make to our country, the Minister of Immigration Kris Faafoi said. “World Refugee Day is also a chance to think about the journey ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Face to face meeting delivers significant progress on NZ-UK FTA
    New Zealand and the UK have committed to accelerating their free trade agreement negotiations with the aim of reaching an agreement in principle this August, Trade Minister Damien O’Connor announced. “We’ve held constructive and productive discussions towards the conclusion of a high-quality and comprehensive FTA that will support sustainable and inclusive trade, and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Government taking action to protect albatross
    New population figures for the critically endangered Antipodean albatross showing a 5 percent decline per year highlights the importance of reducing all threats to these very special birds, Acting Minister of Conservation Dr Ayesha Verrall says. The latest population modelling, carried out by Dragonfly Data Science, shows the Antipodean albatross ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 days ago
  • Adoption laws under review
    New Zealand’s 66-year-old adoption laws are being reviewed, with public engagement beginning today.  Justice Minister Kris Faafoi said the Government is seeking views on options for change to our adoption laws and system. “The Adoption Act has remained largely the same since 1955. We need our adoption laws to reflect ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Wider roll-out of cameras on boats to support sustainability and protect marine life
    Up to 300 inshore commercial fishing vessels will be fitted with on-board cameras by 2024 as part of the Government’s commitment to protect the natural marine environment for future generations.  Minister for Oceans and Fisheries David Parker today announced the funding is now in place for the wider roll out ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Plan for vaccine rollout for general population announced
    New Zealanders over 60 will be offered a vaccination from July 28 and those over 55 from August 11, Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern announced today. The rollout of the vaccine to the general population will be done in age groups as is the approach commonly used overseas, with those over ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • New Zealand introduces Belarus travel bans
    New Zealand has imposed travel bans on selected individuals associated with the Lukashenko regime, following ongoing concerns about election fraud and human rights abuses after the 2020 Belarus elections, Foreign Affairs Minister Nanaia Mahuta has announced. The ban covers more than fifty individuals, including the President and key members of ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • NZ economy grows driven by households, construction and business investment
    The Government’s efforts to secure the recovery have been reflected in the robust rebound of GDP figures released today which show the economy remains resilient despite the ongoing impact of the COVID-19 pandemic, Grant Robertson said. GDP increased 1.6 percent in the first three months of 2021. The Treasury had ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Milestone 250th tower continues to improve rural connectivity
    The Government has welcomed the completion of the 250th 4G mobile tower, as part of its push for better rural connectivity. Waikato’s Wiltsdown, which is roughly 80 kilometres south of Hamilton, is home to the new tower, deployed by the Rural Connectivity Group to enable improved service to 70 homes ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Quarantine Free Travel pause with Victoria to lift on Tuesday
    Following a further public health assessment of the COVID-19 outbreak in greater Melbourne, New Zealand’s Quarantine Free Travel pause with Victoria has been extended to 11.59pm on Tuesday 22 June, COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins says. It has been determined that the risk to public health in New Zealand continues ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Prime Minister mourns passing of Dr Sir Ian Hassall
    Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern is mourning the passing of Dr Sir Ian Hassall, New Zealand’s first Children’s Commissioner and lifelong champion for children and children’s health. As a paediatrician Sir Ian contributed to a major world-first cot death study that has been directly credited with reducing cot deaths in New ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago