Celebrity PM withdraws endorsement
Written By:
- Date published:
8:05 am, June 5th, 2011 - 11 comments
Categories: humour, john key -
Tags: celebrity PM
Following the news that “Celebrities who make false statements while endorsing finance companies could now face jail or fines up to $1 million”, we at The Standard have received the following important document, leaked by an internal National Party source:
Press Release from PM John Key
Monday 6 June
The Beehive
Wellington
On this the celebration of the birthday of our Glorious Majesty Queen Elizabeth II (I met her you know!) I wish to announce, with the greatest of regret, that I can no longer support or endorse New Zealand Inc.
Since all that the people of our great country seem to require of me is appearing on Letterman, breakfast TV, and the occasional photo op with Royalty, I have decided to continue in my role as Lightweight Celebrity PM™. But in order to limit my personal liability I wish to make it clear that I can no longer support or in any way endorse government budget predictions, National Party economic policy, the random gruntings and moanings of Treasury, the knackering of the New Zealand economy, or anything said by Bill English.
On the advice of my lawyers I also wish to declare that any previous endorsements, statements of support, promises, financial projections or vague prognostications, whether actual or implied, are retrospectively invalidated, declared inoperative, and hereby considered null and void. It’s all right there in the fine print punters, read it and weep.
Thank you. Thank you. No really, that’s enough. Thank you. Settle down there. Thank you. Now – would any of youse fellahs like to come back to my place for a barbie and a beer with Prince Willy? (A corgi licked my hand you know!)
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The Green Party is urgently calling on the Government to ban bottom trawling, following news a New Zealand bottom trawler caught 37kg of coral in international waters, prompting the suspension of all fishing in the area until 2026. ...2 weeks ago
- Mark Patterson: Farmers understand we have their backs
Spring is here which means the start of the A&P show season. Those treasured community days where town meets country. There's no rural-urban divide here, just a chance to meet up with family and old friends and celebrate all things that make rural New Zealand so special. I'm embarking on ...2 weeks ago - Release: Funding for Gumboot Friday should pause
The National Government should review its support for Gumboot Friday after unacceptable comments by its leader and champion Mike King. ...2 weeks ago
- Louise Upston cherry-picks data to punch down on the poor
The Government has very conveniently cherry-picked data from the latest MSD projections to justify its cruel agenda and punch-down policy when it comes to people living in poverty. ...2 weeks ago
- Luxon needs to address the cow in the room
The Green Party was appalled to hear Prime Minister Christopher Luxon claim we are “doing everything we can” on climate change, while his government does nothing to address emissions in our most polluting sector. ...2 weeks ago
- Govt Must Clean Up ‘Its Shit’ From Sunken HMNZS Manawanui
Te Pāti Māori is calling out the Government and New Zealand Defence Force (NZDF) for their inaction and disgraceful downplaying of the impact caused by the sunken HMNZS Manawanui in Samoa. “We demand the Government move without further delay to clean up its shit from the sunken HMNZS Manawanui in Samoa,” said co-leader Debbie ...3 weeks ago
- Jamie Arbuckle: Inquiry into Banking Competition
This week was the start of the bank inquiry hearings into banking competition. The inquiry was confirmed in the NZ First/National Coalition agreement. 140 submissions were received on the inquiry, and we will hear from over 60 submitters including all the major banks. ANZ, New Zealand's largest bank, was first ...3 weeks ago
- RIF funding supports aquaculture development
The Coalition Government is backing the development of an aquaculture centre of excellence in Southland with an investment of $2.2 million, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones says. South Island Industrial Fund Ltd will use the Regional Infrastructure Fund (RIF) loan towards its $6.3m project to upgrade infrastructure at the Ocean ...2 hours ago - Safeguarding Kiwis with modern insurance law
Modernised insurance law will provide Kiwis with confidence that they will be treated fairly by insurance providers, Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly says. “A secure insurance market is integral to New Zealand’s economic success. It enables consumers and businesses to access finance and gives them the assurance to ...2 hours ago
- When the going gets tough ‘Get Through’ with Farmstrong
An online hub with mental wellbeing tools and resources designed to help farmers and growers deal with the stress of adverse weather events has been officially launched by Minister for Mental Health, Matt Doocey. “Adverse weather events are an increasingly common reality for our farmers and growers. It’s vital that ...4 hours ago
- Government exploring new energy source
Up to $60 million will be ring-fenced from the Regional Infrastructure Fund to invest in exploring the potential of supercritical geothermal technology which could help secure New Zealand’s future energy needs, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones and Science, Innovation, and Technology Minister Judith Collins say. Having a secure and resilient energy supply ...6 hours ago
- Pay Gap Calculator toolkit launched
New Zealand businesses can now take meaningful action to drive down the gender pay gap with the launch of an online calculator today, Minister for Women Nicola Grigg says. “Women are paid, on average, 8.2 per cent less than men and this gap has barely moved since 2017 - which ...22 hours ago
- Government launches refreshed Public Private Partnership framework
The Government has released a refreshed Public Private Partnership (PPP) framework that provides a blueprint to the market outlining how the government will approach future PPP transactions, Infrastructure Minister Chris Bishop and Parliamentary Under-Secretary Simon Court say. “Refreshing New Zealand’s PPP model is an important part of our plan to ...23 hours ago
- Further decisions taken on regulating online casino gambling
Internal Affairs Minister Brooke van Velden says the Government has agreed to further details of a new system to regulate online casino gambling. “A new Online Gambling Bill will be drafted with the purpose to regulate online casino gambling to facilitate a safer and compliant regulated online gambling market. More importantly, ...1 day ago
- Tailored support for people in emergency housing
Ka mate kāinga tahi, ka ora kāinga rua. An innovative Government trial will tailor support to people with a diverse range of complex needs to move out of emergency housing and into more permanent housing, Associate Housing Minister Tama Potaka says. “The Government has set a target of reducing the ...1 day ago
- Getting ready for bird flu
Biosecurity Minister Andrew Hoggard is encouraging New Zealanders to take steps to be ready for the possible arrival of bird flu.“While high pathogenicity avian influenza (HPAI) is still some distance from New Zealand and we’ve never had a case here, it’s important that we take a cautious approach. “If you’re one ...1 day ago
- Harbour closure supports mussel reseeding
A two-year ban on the take of kuku/mussels from Ōhiwa Harbour in eastern Bay of Plenty will support local efforts to restore mussel beds in the area, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. Te Rūnanga o Ngāti Awa requested the closure, Te rāhui kuku ki tua o Kanawa, to ...1 day ago
- Government awards primary sector scholarships to tertiary students
The coalition Government has awarded scholarships to six tertiary students as part of efforts to boost on-the-ground support for farmers and growers Agriculture Minister Todd McClay and Associate Agriculture Minister Andrew Hoggard announced today. “We are reducing the regulatory burden on farmers and growers and providing support to adapt and innovate, ...1 day ago
- Tax work programme focused on rebuilding the economy
Rebuilding the economy and improving fiscal sustainability is the key focus of the Government’s new Tax and Social Policy Work Programme for Inland Revenue, Revenue Minister Simon Watts says. “New Zealand has been grappling with significant economic challenges over the last few years with many businesses and households feeling the ...1 day ago
- Omnibus Bill First Reading for Royal Commission of Inquiry National Apology
Mr Speaker, as the Minister for Children, it is my priority to ensure that children and young people in the care system are safe. The thousands of survivors who shared their experiences with the Royal Commission have been clear that the system must improve its protections against abuse and neglect. ...2 days ago
- Clarifying the protection of disabled people in care
The Government is amending the Crimes Act to ensure the protection of disabled people in care is made more explicit, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “As part of the Government’s response to the recommendations of the Abuse in Care Royal Commission, the word ‘disability’ is being added to the definition ...2 days ago
- Oranga Tamariki Act changes a step in the right direction
Changes to the Oranga Tamariki Act 1989 included in an Omnibus Bill are long overdue and a positive step in the right direction, Minister for Children Karen Chhour says. As part of the National Apology today, the Responding to Abuse in Care Legislation Amendment Bill had its first reading. “I am ...2 days ago
- Improvements to Government record-keeping in response to the Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse ...
Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden says the Government is making changes to the Public Records Act, to improve the record-keeping practices of government agencies. “These changes will allow the Chief Archivist to audit an agency more frequently where required and will also allow the Chief Archivist to work ...2 days ago
- Minister Peters completes successful visit to Chile
New Zealand and Chile have reaffirmed their strong partnership, including on security, trade, Antarctic issues, and people-to-people links, says Foreign Minister Winston Peters. “Chile is one of New Zealand’s closest and most like-minded partners in Latin America, and it is the gateway to the region for many New Zealanders,” Mr ...2 days ago
- ‘Foreign policy views from an Indo-Pacific neighbour’ – Speech on New Zealand fore...
Kia ora. Tēnā koutou katoa. And greetings from New Zealand. Thank you to Rector Devés and the University of Chile for hosting us today, and to Undersecretary de la Fuente and Professor López for the warm welcome and introductions. When a much younger person, walking on a bridge ...2 days ago
- Prime Minister apologises for abuse in care
Ngā kura mōrehu, Treasured survivors, kua ngaro, haere atu rā. those that have passed, farewell. Ngā kura mōrehu, Treasured survivors E whakawhaiti nei that have gathered here. Kei ngā rangatira To the esteemed leaders Tēnā koutou katoa. Greetings. I’d like to welcome you ...2 days ago
- Government apologises for abuse in care
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has apologised to all New Zealanders who were abused in the care of state and faith-based institutions. “This is a significant and sorrowful day in New Zealand,” Mr Luxon says. “Today, I am apologising on behalf of the Government to everyone who suffered abuse, harm and ...2 days ago
- Climate Change Minister to attend COP29 in Baku
Climate Change Minister Simon Watts will attend the 29th annual United Nations Climate Change Summit (COP29) in Baku, Azerbaijan, this week. “New Zealand is fully committed to meeting our climate targets and reducing the impacts of climate change. Every country has a role to play, and New Zealand will continue ...3 days ago
- Crown Observer appointed to Wellington City Council
Experienced local government practitioner Lindsay McKenzie has been appointed as a Crown Observer to Wellington City Council, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown says.“Wellington City Council is facing significant challenges in delivering services to its community, while balancing its debt and insurance obligations,” Mr Brown says.“The decision to appoint a Crown ...3 days ago
- Govt strengthens protection for people in state care
The Government is introducing several law changes to better protect people in state care, in response to the Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse in Care. “The magnitude of the abuse detailed by the Royal Commission of Inquiry was heartbreaking, and as a Government we will do everything in our ...3 days ago
- Prime Minister to attend APEC Leaders’ Meeting
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon departs for Peru this week to attend the annual APEC Economic Leaders’ Meeting from 15-16 November. “The APEC Summit is a key moment in the regional calendar. It’s an opportunity to meet with counterparts who are also grappling with cost-of-living challenges and choices about driving more ...3 days ago
- First kina barren special permit approved
New rules allowing local communities to take direct action against kina barrens are starting to bear fruit, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. “I’ve made kina barrens a priority, which is why I introduced a new special permit purpose this year to allow the removal and translocation of kina ...3 days ago
- Faster 110km/h speed limit to accelerate Kāpiti from 13 November
The new 110km/h speed limit on the Kāpiti Expressway Road of National Significance (RoNS) will come into effect on 13 November 2024, more than two weeks earlier than expected, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.“Boosting economic growth and productivity is a priority for the Government. The new 110km/h speed limit will ...3 days ago
- Largest ever number of graduate vets to boost rural productivity and support farmers
Thirty-five graduate vets will join rural communities this year through the Voluntary Bonding Scheme (VBS) for Veterinarians, marking the largest intake in the scheme’s history, Agriculture Minister Todd McClay, and Associate Agriculture Minister Andrew Hoggard, announced today. “The Government is committed to enhancing primary sector productivity and delivering direct benefits ...3 days ago
- Stalking to become illegal and jailable offence
The Government has agreed to introduce legislation this year that will make stalking illegal with a maximum penalty of up to five years in prison, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “Every New Zealander deserves to feel safe in their community and this Government is committed to making sure victims are ...4 days ago
- Nationally significant sites to be upgraded
Me mihi ngakaunui ki a Tā Robert Gillies e ngaro nei ki tōna nui o Te Rua Tekau Mā Waru. Farewell to Sir Robert Gillies of the 28th (Māori) Battalion. The Government will provide $20.3 million in funding to improve two sites that have a special place in the hearts ...4 days ago
- Unions shouldn’t get in the way of student learning
The Government is urging the Post Primary Teachers’ Association (PPTA) to put the education of their students first. “Between 9am and 3pm, parents expect their children to be at school to learn. Our Government is relentlessly focused on ensuring the value of achievement and attendance are at the centre of ...6 days ago
- Compensation scheme levies to be risk based
The levies that banks, building societies, credit unions and finance companies pay to the new Depositor Compensation Scheme (DCS) fund will reflect the size and riskiness of the institutions, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. Under the scheme, deposits up to the value of $100,000 per depositor will be protected in ...6 days ago
- New Child Centre will improve mental health outcomes in Tauranga
Minister for Mental Health Matt Doocey today opened Te Waka Aorangi Child Wellness Centre at Tauranga Hospital, marking a significant milestone in the Government’s commitment to enhancing the health of children and whānau in the Bay of Plenty region. “Te Waka Aorangi is leading the way by providing a ‘one-stop-shop’ ...6 days ago
- Dr Daniel Tulloch appointed to FENZ board
Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden has today announced that Dr Daniel Tulloch has be appointed to Fire and Emergency New Zealand board. “I am pleased to announce that Dr Daniel Tulloch has been appointed for a three-year term of office” says Ms van Velden. “Dr Tulloch is a ...6 days ago
- Social Investment Board appointed
Former Treasury Secretary Dr Graham Scott has been appointed as chair of the newly established Social Investment Board, alongside a group of highly skilled individuals, Social Investment Minister Nicola Willis says. The board will advise on the implementation of the social investment approach across the public sector and the work ...6 days ago
- Poroporoaki: Sir Robert ‘Bom’ Gillies
E te Ikanui a Whiro kua mau nei i te kupenga a Aitua. Kua turakina e te hoariri e kore nei e tāea te karo, mōrehu mutunga o te hokowhitu a Tū ki te Riri Tuarua o te Ao, unuhia tō kōuma, whakairihia tō patu ki tara-ā-whare, whītikihia te tatua ...6 days ago
- New Zealand and Irish Governments partner to support farming through research
New Zealand and Ireland are investing $9.6 million in targeted research to deliver practical solutions that reduce emissions for New Zealand’s primary producers, announced Agriculture Minister Todd McClay today. The joint effort, led by New Zealand’s Ministry for Primary Industries (MPI) and Ireland's Department of Agriculture, Food and the Marine, ...6 days ago
- Rail Network Rebuild to be delivered ahead of City Rail Link opening
The Government has confirmed a programme of upgrades to Auckland’s rail network that will complete the Rail Network Rebuild ahead of the City Rail Link (CRL) opening, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Acting Auckland Mayor Desley Simpson say. “The last National Government started the City Rail Link to transform public transport ...6 days ago
- Foreign Minister to visit Latin America
Foreign Minister Winston Peters will visit Chile, Mexico and Peru next week. “Chile and Mexico are two of New Zealand’s closest partners in Latin America and we are pleased to be visiting them next week,” Mr Peters says. Mr Peters will have bilateral programmes in Santiago and Mexico City involving ...6 days ago
- $340m NZ-China trade boost through 24 key partnerships
Minister for Trade and Agriculture, Todd McClay, announced the signing of 24 Memorandums of Understanding (MOUs) and supply agreements between New Zealand and Chinese companies as part of the Trade Mission to the China International Import Expo (CIIE) in Shanghai and Guangdong province this week. “These new partnerships are set to ...7 days ago
- Prime Minister pays tribute to Sir Robert ‘Bom’ Gillies
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has paid tribute to Sir Robert ‘Bom’ Gillies KNZM, the last surviving member of the 28 (Māori) Battalion, who passed away today. “Sir Bom will be remembered for his service to New Zealand and defending the ideals we value most. “With trademark humility, he took it ...7 days ago
- Christopher Luxon gives scathing appraisal of Treaty Principles Bill ahead of first reading
The Prime Minister has given a scathing appraisal of the bill on the day of its first reading. ...34 minutes ago - The House: It’s all politics
In Parliament, anything and everything can be political including things as innocuous as playground equipment, clothing, colours, and even eating takeaways. ...38 minutes ago
- Waitangi Tribunal demands release Te Aka Whai Ora documents
A treaty lawyer says she can't recall the tribunal issuing a directive like this before. ...1 hour ago
- Christopher Luxon gives scathing appraisal of Treaty Principles Bill at its first reading
The Prime Minister has given a scathing appraisal of the bill on the day of its first reading. ...2 hours ago
- Nationalism is surging – changing the way companies do business overseas
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Sihong Wu, Lecturer, School of Business, University of Auckland, Waipapa Taumata Rau The resurgence of nationalism across the globe is not just a political issue. It’s emerging as a powerful force that multinational companies cannot afford to ignore. Recent events such ...2 hours ago - Menopause is having a moment. How a new generation of women are shaping cultural attitudes
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Bridgette Glover, PhD Candidate in Media and Communications, University of New England From hot flashes to hysteria, film and TV have long represented menopause as scary, emotional and messy. Recently, celebrities have been sharing their personal menopause experiences on social media, ...2 hours ago
- The case for reading books about animals wearing clothes
In light of Gloriavale’s reluctant acceptance of Winnie-the-Pooh, Claire Mabey argues in favour of the wider canon of anthropomorphic animal literature. There is nothing more bleak than the banning of books and the curtailment of reading. Control what people read and you control what they think, and how they behave. ...2 hours ago - Hīkoi day four: Setting off from Huntly on way to Wellington – bill reading
RNZ News Thousands of people are continuing their North Island hīkoi as the legislation they are protesting against, the Treaty Principles Bill, gets its first reading in Parliament today. The hīkoi enters day four and headed off from Huntly, destined for Rotorua today, after it advanced through Auckland Tāmaki Makaurau ...2 hours ago
- Coldplay and 57,000 babies at Eden Park
Review: Everything happens all at once at Coldplay’s sold-out show. About 15 minutes into Music of the Spheres, I realised that we were all just big babies. When Coldplay emerged for their first song, our compostable plastic wristbands lit up around Eden Park, delighting us all. Minutes later, Chris Martin ...3 hours ago
- Health NZ Commissioner steps in to stop staff losing Milo
The man in charge of the country's public health system has stepped in to ensure all staff can still have a drink of Milo at work. ...3 hours ago
- Inland Revenue calls in debt collectors over overseas student debt
Around 1000 Kiwis working in Australia have begun repaying some of their student loan debt in the last three months, an IRD manager says. ...3 hours ago
- Incorrect patient data found during system upgrades at Auckland’s hospitals
A team is working to correct and update this, Te Whatu Ora spokesperson says. ...4 hours ago
- Dear Donald, here’s why you should cut NZ a break in the tariff torrent
Ten irrefutable reasons for the incoming president to exempt plucky little New Zealand from import tax hikes. The former and future president, Donald J Trump, has been re-elected on a platform pledging new and universal import tariffs of 10%-20%. The challenge for New Zealand politicians and officials is to somehow ...4 hours ago
- Donald Trump picks Matt Gaetz to serve as attorney general
The congressman, who remains under investigation for sexual misconduct, said it would "be an honour to serve" in the role. ...4 hours ago
- A 41-million-digit prime number is the biggest ever found – but mathematicians’ search for perfe...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By John Voight, Professor of Mathematics , University of Sydney Imagine a number made up of a vast string of ones: 1111111…111. Specifically, 136,279,841 ones in a row. If we stacked up that many sheets of paper, the resulting tower would stretch into ...5 hours ago
- Elon Musk has turned X into a globally influential media platform – and there’s more to come
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Lewis Mitchell, Professor of Data Science; Director, Adelaide Data Science Centre, University of Adelaide kovop/Shutterstock During the recent United States presidential election campaign, tech billionaire Elon Musk’s social media platform X (formerly Twitter) saw record high usage. The platform – ...5 hours ago
- The NZ government’s plan to withhold COVID inquiry findings until 2026 leaves the country ill-prep...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Shaun Hendy, Professor of Physics, Te Herenga Waka — Victoria University of Wellington Getty Images The first report from a Royal Commission of Inquiry to review New Zealand’s response to the COVID pandemic was due to be released this month. ...5 hours ago
- 6 things to do if your child’s weight is beyond the ideal range – and 1 thing to avoid
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Nick Fuller, Clinical Trials Director, Department of Endocrinology, RPA Hospital, University of Sydney JPC-PROD/Shutterstock One of the more significant challenges we face as parents is making sure our kids are growing at a healthy rate. To manage this, we take them ...5 hours ago
- ‘Catastrophic declines’: massive data haul reveals why so many plants and animals suffer after f...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Don Driscoll, Professor in Terrestrial Ecology, Deakin University The megafires that tore through Australia’s forests in 2019–20 burnt more than ten million hectares. The tragedy prompted a massive research effort to understand how plants and animals were affected. So what did ...5 hours ago
- First off, have a plan – 5 ways young people can stay safe at schoolies
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Alison Hutton, Professor of Nursing, Western Sydney University Year 12 exams are finishing around Australia and celebrations are beginning. Thousands of students will mark the end of high school in coming weeks with “schoolies”. This is an important rite of passage ...5 hours ago
- Australia has backed away from plans to introduce local quotas on streaming platforms – again
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Alexa Scarlata, Research Fellow, Media & Communication, RMIT University The federal government has quietly shelved plans to introduce local requirements for Australian screen content on streaming platforms like Netflix and Disney+. In October, Federal Arts Minister Tony Burke flagged quotas were being ...5 hours ago
- Help Me Hera: Why do I only befriend people nobody else can stand?
How do I end this cycle of misery, once and for all? Want Hera’s help? Email your problem to helpme@thespinoff.co.nz Dear Hera How do I break a lifelong pattern of forming close friendships with people that nobody else can stand? Ever since I was about 12, I have had a succession of very ...5 hours ago
- One NZ learns the hard way, don’t rely on Elon Musk
The Commerce Commission files criminal charges against the telco for over-promising, after SpaceX failed to deliver its much-vaunted direct-to-cell satellite service on schedule The post One NZ learns the hard way, don’t rely on Elon Musk appeared first on Newsroom. ...5 hours ago - First the Ferraris, then the mansion – tech leader takes record property hit
Multi-million dollar houses in exclusive private estates have been the biggest winners, and the biggest losers, in the three-year property downturn The post First the Ferraris, then the mansion – tech leader takes record property hit appeared first on Newsroom. ...5 hours ago
- Live: Hīkoi heads to Rotorua as Treaty Principles Bill gets first reading
The hīkoi will leave from Huntly this morning and hold a gathering in Hamilton. ...7 hours ago
- On the frontlines of Hīkoi mō te Tiriti
Thousands converged on Auckland, the day before the first reading of the controversial Treaty Principles Bill, writes Stewart Sowman-Lund for The Bulletin. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign up here. ...7 hours ago
- Retracing the footsteps of past Māori protest movements
As the nationwide hīkoi for Te Tiriti made its way through Auckland it stopped at two sites synonymous with Māori resistance - Bastion Point and Ihumātao. ...7 hours ago
- Treaty Principles Bill: Bill of Rights Act advice ‘quite damning’ – academic
The government's lawyers have advised the Treaty Principles Bill is consistent with the Bill of Rights Act - but only because they expect courts would not allow it to override that law or the Treaty itself. ...8 hours ago
- Number of speed safety cameras slashed but cost per camera doubles
The government told RNZ the 800-camera network had been unfunded. ...9 hours ago
- Health officials warned government more money needed to meet targets
Released documents show health officials made clear their belief the targets couldn't be reached without more funding. ...9 hours ago
- D-Day for government’s Treaty Principles Bill
The legislation is up for its first reading after Question Time this afternoon. ...9 hours ago
- You’re gonna miss the post office when it’s gone
Despite it dwindling locations and reduced service, NZ Post remains a pillar in every community, writes Hera Lindsay Bird. Every Saturday morning I arrive at 7.30am, and enter the post office box lobby. Behind the narrow corridor of identical red letterboxes, there is a locked room, full of ancient Christmas ...9 hours ago
- ‘Whaka round, find out’: When the hīkoi came to Auckland
The Toitū te Tiriti hīkoi reached Auckland on Wednesday, seeing thousands cross the Harbour Bridge and walk around the coast to Bastion Point. Lyric Waiwiri-Smith joined them. Atop Bastion Point, a crowd of red, black and white gathered at the end of what we’ve been told is a history-making moment. ...9 hours ago
- Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 14 November
Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A,DIV,A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Thursday 14 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...9 hours ago
- Labour needs to learn the art of the deal
Opinion: Unless the Democrats and Labour trim their policy sails accordingly, they will lose elections that matter The post Labour needs to learn the art of the deal appeared first on Newsroom. ...9 hours ago
- Trump II and the coming ‘golden age’ of tyranny in the Middle East
In his rambling victory speech on November 5, Donald Trump, having stoked the fears of Americans throughout his campaign, and sporting extra fake tan for the occasion, spoke of a new ‘golden age’.In terms of Middle East foreign policy, with whom will Trump look to build this ‘golden age’?In May ...9 hours ago
- Book of the Week: Day of the lizard
When I first spotted the new illustrated book Geckos & Skinks: The remarkable lizards of Aotearoa in the window of a Wellington bookstore in October (I was visiting with my wife Fi who was going to WOW with her cousins and niece. I wasn’t. I went once in 2002 and ...9 hours ago
- Daily crossword, Thursday 14 November
The post Daily crossword, Thursday 14 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...9 hours ago
- Survivors say torture widespread, Govt says that’s unlikely
Survivors and lawyers are calling on the Govt to release legal advice that says other abuse at psychiatric institutions doesn’t meet the definition of torture The post Survivors say torture widespread, Govt says that’s unlikely appeared first on Newsroom. ...9 hours ago
- An often-toxic artificial lake receives a collective shrug
A man-made lake north of Christchurch is a ‘filthy drain’ but few seem interested in fixing it The post An often-toxic artificial lake receives a collective shrug appeared first on Newsroom. ...9 hours ago
The server will be getting hardware changes this evening starting at 10pm NZDT.
The site will be off line for some hours.
I’m glad he did this because the GST increase and changes to KiwiSaver are all OK now.
A Memorial Service will be held in the Christchurch Cathedral in memory of the sterling performance of the imitation Prime Minister John Key, whose antics kept so many amused for so long in our times of great need. Amen
Folks at the Service would be spoilt for choice – whether to shed tears … or laughter.
It wasn’t a corgi – it was Duncan.
Who needs to be a royal, here I am a perfectly happy Kiwi bloke with money to burn, someone else doing the cooking on the barbie, a bottle of Southern Ale in one hand and in the other, my cellphone to check my interests. I’m King John the Charming, having a right royal time.
I guess all the funny left wing Satirical people are from the states.
The Government says no, only those with a name and reputation would be affected.
Urrrrm…. I have a name and repuation & I’m a celebrity in my own mind. What dictates who and at which stage you become famous there-fore liable (Weekly Mags, News paper,TV, Radio….) it’s a bit open ended and would be arguable.
Now – would any of youse fellahs like to come back to my place for a barbie and a beer with “My willy” Prince! (name of a body part) 🙄
There fixed it up for ya R0B
Great parody .. but truth is often stranger than fiction.
Have a look at
http://ebookee.org/The-Rise-of-the-Rich-A-New-View-of-Modern-World-History_998165.html
This may be the best way for a Kiwi Saver saver to get a return on their investment, if they can prove they went into KS because of say Helen or John’s endorsement of the scam, and now as we are seeing we are well past peak economy, and KS will be looking more and more like a mangy dog, could they sue?
Make it retrospective and take it back to when it went through the house, that would kind of stuff up Fitzsimmons retirement plans, to name one of the carpet baggers that think they are scot free.
Well prior to the comming election let’s retrospectively invalidate the National Party !!!!
Will he be going on ‘I’m a Celebrity Get me Out of here’ – Currency Trader special, held in Maui?