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Caption Competition

Written By: - Date published: 6:28 pm, September 7th, 2010 - 41 comments
Categories: john key, leadership - Tags: , ,

Yesterday Mr Key said he would leave for London to visit the Queen, only if he “could be confident Christchurch’s recovery was on track”, and appointed Big Jezza to oversee the Government’s Christchurch earthquake response.

Today Key announced he won’t be leaving any time soon.

41 comments on “Caption Competition ”

  1. Draco T Bastard 1

    Gerry doing an impression of a horse: Sleeping on his feet.

  2. joe bloggs 2

    No matter how stupid your comments I wouldn’t wish the disaster Christchurch has suffered on anyone.

    Christchurch’s recovery is clearly going to take longer than anyone first thought and I won’t be leaving any time soon.

    • The Voice of Reason 2.1

      “Christchurch’s recovery is clearly going to take longer than anyone first thought and I won’t be leaving any time soon.”

      Ok, that’s Gerry’s part of the gag sorted, what’s Key gonna say for a punchline?

  3. lprent 3

    Clueless contemplates Bolger and Shipley going overseas. Brownlee contemplates how clueless a PM can be

  4. The Voice of Reason 4

    Well, I was going to go with “that’s not an earthquake, it’s just Gerry’s tummy rumbling”, but that’d be obvious. How about:

    “… and this is my Maxwell Smart impression. Next up, Gerry does Norm from Cheers and a really funny Sergeant Shultz that I think you’ll love!”

  5. Arandar 5

    They’re changing guard at Buckingham Palace
    John was going till told it was callous
    “Do you think the Queen will forget about me?”
    “Bound to, dear, but we’ll have to see,”
    Said Alice.

  6. ianmac 6

    Sir John said,” I tried to find a competent person to be Minister of Earthquakes so I could go overseas, but— all I could find was him so I dare not leave.” Sir John felt very very sad.

  7. Jum 7


  8. smhead 8

    “Clueless still miles ahead of Goff in polls. Gerry tries to remember who Goff is.”

  9. outofbed 9

    Gerry, ” Is this the right time for a tommy cooper impression”

  10. joe90 10


    Fuck Gerry!, did ya have too..

    Sorry boss….. It just slipped out……sniff…sniff….whoar!….silent but deadly…eye watering…aye boss…

    Dirty bastard!…….

  11. Pascal's bookie 11

    Yeah. it’s not a biggie. Kind of funny acshully. This sort of thing always seems to happen to me. Remember when I had to hit Ruddy up for a shower? Ha. So I was just wondering if any of youse had some jumper leads, my economic development minister seems to have died.

  12. Rex Widerstrom 12

    “We were going to cheer everyone up with our rendition of ‘Who’s on first?’ but I couldn’t find my bowler hat and Gerry sat on his fake moustache and no one’s game to try and find it. But we’ve got the expressions down pat, right?”

  13. Bill 13

    At least fats can’t knock the bowler off my head. Just this once. Small mercy. I mean, fck. I know I’m about to create another fine mess and be getting us all gotten into.

  14. Bill 14

    “Don’t smack the back of his head. Don’t smack the back of his head. Don’t smack……”

    • Bill 14.1

      Ah shit. This is where he smacks the back of my head. Here it comes..here it comes…any second now…

  15. Mac1 15

    Gerry. “I never knew an aftershock could smell sulphury.”

  16. peterlepaysan 16

    Gerry: Why am I here? First mining? Now this?
    John: Hee hee.

  17. Logie97 17

    in deference to the greats Laurel and Hardy …

    Stan: “Say, what do you think I am, Cinderella? If I had any sense I’d walk out on you.”
    Ollie: “Well it’s a good thing you haven’t any sense!”

  18. tea 18

    Gerry wondered just how relaxed about things he would have to be to become Prime Minister

  19. George.com 19

    “Shit” think Gerry, “John is looking more and more like George W Bush”.

  20. bbfloyd 20

    Damn gerry what did you put in those cocktails last night?


  21. Loota 21

    Oi! Pay attention! I became PM to have high tea with the Queen. Not deal with this shit.

  22. mcflock 22

    I have to go see the Queen.

    But I will continue von Frankenstein’s research while I am overseas, and with luck my creation will stripmine Christ’s Church before I return…

  23. Marty G 23

    this is easily the best caption contest I’ve ever seen. you’re all geniuses.

  24. F.Y 24

    “Our Father, who art in heaven,

    If you stop John’s plane from crashing, I promise never to think about mining again.


  25. Lazy Susan 25

    Gerry: “Now remember what the boss said ‘stand still, look stoic, but under no circumstances open your big fat mouth and eff it up like the last job I gave you’ ”

    John: “I’ve brought Gerry, Paula and a couple of other clowns with me to cheer you all up!”

  26. outofbed 26

    Gerry . “if I had a traffic cone on my head would people love me too?”

  27. outofbed 27

    Further to my Tommy Cooper joke:-

    John. we said fess up! oh never mind

  28. jbanks 28

    Gerry: “This earthquake is just what we needed to be seen productive in the media. I’m going back to sleep”.

    John: “I’m soooo tired, where’s that useless prick Goff again?”

  29. Adrian 29

    ” Jerry was the only choice, he’s so big he’s the only thing that hasn’t moved in Chch in the last week”

  30. Alan 30

    “Gerry will fix Christchurch. He’s the best man we’ve got for the job – he’s a woodwork teacher you know.”

  31. ak 31

    Kiwi leaders “relax” at Labor win. “Yep, Brak just textsted me”

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