Caption contest
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1:17 pm, June 9th, 2012 - 76 comments
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Before the captions, some serious analysis, because this new Nat promo photo really astounds me.I honestly don’t know what the Nats were thinking.
It might work if Key were a nationally-adored figure, a kindly uncle, who had delivered a golden age for the country (fat-arse watch symbolising prosperity) and was at the height of his popularity. But he hasn’t delivered a golden age. He’s six months past his peak and on the way down quickly. Increasingly, when we see him it’s defending the indefensible and arguing with the media.
Given that reality, it looks like some creepy dating site pic.
Key looks out of touch, saying ‘ ain’t everything grand?’, drawing the response, ‘maybe for you but not for us, and what the fuck was that about increasing class sizes?’. It’s hardly in keeping with the new ‘statesman’ iteration of Brand Key the Nats are trying to build.
Maybe his advisors are getting out of touch too.
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- Significant step forward in fixing cruel and unjust pastA significant milestone has been reached in the fight to strike an anti-Pasifika and unfair law from the country’s books after Teanau Tuiono’s members’ bill passed its first reading. ...2 weeks ago
- Missed opportunity but NZ will surely one day recognise the right to a sustainable environmentNew Zealand has today missed the opportunity to uphold the right to a clean, healthy, and sustainable environment, says James Shaw after his member’s bill was voted down in its first reading. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Don’t cut our lunches – clear message sent to GovernmentTens of thousands of people are demanding the Government commits to fully funding free and healthy school lunches. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Govt makes U-turn on Suicide Prevention OfficeLabour welcomes the Government’s U-turn on the closure of the Suicide Prevention Office, says Labour Mental Health spokesperson Ingrid Leary. ...3 weeks ago
- CCC issues warning over further climate delayToday’s advice from the Climate Change Commission paints a sobering reality of the challenge we face in combating climate change, especially in light of recent Government policy announcements. ...3 weeks ago
- Luxon targets lame and lousy example of leadershipIf talk is cheap, Chris Luxon’s “targets” are bankrupt. ...3 weeks ago
- Luxon targets are lousy example of leadershipIf talk is cheap, Chris Luxon’s “targets” are bankrupt. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Commitment to disability communities missing from Govt prioritiesMinister for Disability Issues Penny Simmonds appears to have delayed a report back to Cabinet on the progress New Zealand is making against international obligations for disabled New Zealanders. ...3 weeks ago
- Taking action on Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder
Hundreds of New Zealand families affected by Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD) will benefit from a new Government focus on prevention and treatment, says Health Minister Dr Shane Reti. “We know FASD is a leading cause of preventable intellectual and neurodevelopmental disability in New Zealand,” Dr Reti says. “Every day, ...3 hours ago - New sports complex opens in KaikoheRegional Development Minister Shane Jones today attended the official opening of Kaikohe’s new $14.7 million sports complex. “The completion of the Kaikohe Multi Sports Complex is a fantastic achievement for the Far North,” Mr Jones says. “This facility not only fulfils a long-held dream for local athletes, but also creates ...5 hours ago
- Diplomacy needed more than everForeign Minister Winston Peters’ engagements in Türkiye this week underlined the importance of diplomacy to meet growing global challenges. “Returning to the Gallipoli Peninsula to represent New Zealand at Anzac commemorations was a sombre reminder of the critical importance of diplomacy for de-escalating conflicts and easing tensions,” Mr Peters ...9 hours ago
- Anzac Commemorative Address, Buttes New British Cemetery BelgiumAmbassador Millar, Burgemeester, Vandepitte, Excellencies, military representatives, distinguished guests, ladies and gentlemen – good morning and welcome to this sacred Anzac Day dawn service. It is an honour to be here on behalf of the Government and people of New Zealand at Buttes New British Cemetery, Polygon Wood – a deeply ...24 hours ago
- Anzac Commemorative Address – NZ National Service, Chunuk BairDistinguished guests - It is an honour to return once again to this site which, as the resting place for so many of our war-dead, has become a sacred place for generations of New Zealanders. Our presence here and at the other special spaces of Gallipoli is made ...2 days ago
- Anzac Commemorative Address – Dawn Service, Gallipoli, TürkiyeMai ia tawhiti pamamao, te moana nui a Kiwa, kua tae whakaiti mai matou, ki to koutou papa whenua. No koutou te tapuwae, no matou te tapuwae, kua honoa pumautia. Ko nga toa kua hinga nei, o te Waipounamu, o te Ika a Maui, he okioki tahi me o ...2 days ago
- PM announces changes to portfoliosPaul Goldsmith will take on responsibility for the Media and Communications portfolio, while Louise Upston will pick up the Disability Issues portfolio, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon announced today. “Our Government is relentlessly focused on getting New Zealand back on track. As issues change in prominence, I plan to adjust Ministerial ...3 days ago
- New catch limits for unique fishery areasRecreational catch limits will be reduced in areas of Fiordland and the Chatham Islands to help keep those fisheries healthy and sustainable, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. The lower recreational daily catch limits for a range of finfish and shellfish species caught in the Fiordland Marine Area and ...3 days ago
- Minister welcomes hydrogen milestoneEnergy Minister Simeon Brown has welcomed an important milestone in New Zealand’s hydrogen future, with the opening of the country’s first network of hydrogen refuelling stations in Wiri. “I want to congratulate the team at Hiringa Energy and its partners K one W one (K1W1), Mitsui & Co New Zealand ...4 days ago
- Urgent changes to system through first RMA Amendment BillThe coalition Government is delivering on its commitment to improve resource management laws and give greater certainty to consent applicants, with a Bill to amend the Resource Management Act (RMA) expected to be introduced to Parliament next month. RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop has today outlined the first RMA Amendment ...4 days ago
- Overseas decommissioning models consideredOverseas models for regulating the oil and gas sector, including their decommissioning regimes, are being carefully scrutinised as a potential template for New Zealand’s own sector, Resources Minister Shane Jones says. The Coalition Government is focused on rebuilding investor confidence in New Zealand’s energy sector as it looks to strengthen ...4 days ago
- Release of North Island Severe Weather Event InquiryEmergency Management and Recovery Minister Mark Mitchell has today released the Report of the Government Inquiry into the response to the North Island Severe Weather Events. “The report shows that New Zealand’s emergency management system is not fit-for-purpose and there are some significant gaps we need to address,” Mr Mitchell ...4 days ago
- Justice Minister to attend Human Rights CouncilJustice Minister Paul Goldsmith is today travelling to Europe where he’ll update the United Nations Human Rights Council on the Government’s work to restore law and order. “Attending the Universal Periodic Review in Geneva provides us with an opportunity to present New Zealand’s human rights progress, priorities, and challenges, while ...5 days ago
- Patterson reopens world’s largest wool scouring facilityAssociate Agriculture Minister, Mark Patterson, formally reopened the world’s largest wool processing facility today in Awatoto, Napier, following a $50 million rebuild and refurbishment project. “The reopening of this facility will significantly lift the economic opportunities available to New Zealand’s wool sector, which already accounts for 20 per cent of ...5 days ago
- Speech to the Southland Otago Regional Engineering Collective Summit, 18 April 2024Hon Andrew Bayly, Minister for Small Business and Manufacturing At the Southland Otago Regional Engineering Collective (SOREC) Summit, 18 April, Dunedin Ngā mihi nui, Ko Andrew Bayly aho, Ko Whanganui aho Good Afternoon and thank you for inviting me to open your summit today. I am delighted ...5 days ago
- Government to introduce revised Three Strikes lawThe Government is delivering on its commitment to bring back the Three Strikes legislation, Associate Justice Minister Nicole McKee announced today. “Our Government is committed to restoring law and order and enforcing appropriate consequences on criminals. We are making it clear that repeat serious violent or sexual offending is not ...5 days ago
- New diplomatic appointmentsForeign Minister Winston Peters has today announced four new diplomatic appointments for New Zealand’s overseas missions. “Our diplomats have a vital role in maintaining and protecting New Zealand’s interests around the world,” Mr Peters says. “I am pleased to announce the appointment of these senior diplomats from the ...5 days ago
- Humanitarian support for Ethiopia and SomaliaNew Zealand is contributing NZ$7 million to support communities affected by severe food insecurity and other urgent humanitarian needs in Ethiopia and Somalia, Foreign Minister Rt Hon Winston Peters announced today. “Over 21 million people are in need of humanitarian assistance across Ethiopia, with a further 6.9 million people ...5 days ago
- Arts Minister congratulates Mataaho CollectiveMinister for Arts, Culture and Heritage Paul Goldsmith is congratulating Mataaho Collective for winning the Golden Lion for best participant in the main exhibition at the Venice Biennale. "Congratulations to the Mataaho Collective for winning one of the world's most prestigious art prizes at the Venice Biennale. “It is good ...6 days ago
- Supporting better financial outcomes for KiwisThe Government is reforming financial services to improve access to home loans and other lending, and strengthen customer protections, Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly and Housing Minister Chris Bishop announced today. “Our coalition Government is committed to rebuilding the economy and making life simpler by cutting red tape. We are ...6 days ago
- Trade relationship with China remains strong“China remains a strong commercial opportunity for Kiwi exporters as Chinese businesses and consumers continue to value our high-quality safe produce,” Trade and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay says. Mr McClay has returned to New Zealand following visits to Beijing, Harbin and Shanghai where he met ministers, governors and mayors and engaged in trade and agricultural events with the New ...6 days ago
- PM’s South East Asia mission does the businessPrime Minister Christopher Luxon has completed a successful trip to Singapore, Thailand and the Philippines, deepening relationships and capitalising on opportunities. Mr Luxon was accompanied by a business delegation and says the choice of countries represents the priority the New Zealand Government places on South East Asia, and our relationships in ...1 week ago
- $41m to support clean energy in South East AsiaNew Zealand is demonstrating its commitment to reducing global greenhouse emissions, and supporting clean energy transition in South East Asia, through a contribution of NZ$41 million (US$25 million) in climate finance to the Asian Development Bank (ADB)-led Energy Transition Mechanism (ETM). Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Climate Change Minister Simon Watts announced ...1 week ago
- Minister releases Fast-track stakeholder listThe Government is today releasing a list of organisations who received letters about the Fast-track applications process, says RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop. “Recently Ministers and agencies have received a series of OIA requests for a list of organisations to whom I wrote with information on applying to have a ...1 week ago
- Judicial appointments announcedAttorney-General Judith Collins today announced the appointment of Wellington Barrister David Jonathan Boldt as a Judge of the High Court, and the Honourable Justice Matthew Palmer as a Judge of the Court of Appeal. Justice Boldt graduated with an LLB from Victoria University of Wellington in 1990, and also holds ...1 week ago
- Education Minister heads to major teaching summit in SingaporeEducation Minister Erica Stanford will lead the New Zealand delegation at the 2024 International Summit on the Teaching Profession (ISTP) held in Singapore. The delegation includes representatives from the Post Primary Teachers’ Association (PPTA) Te Wehengarua and the New Zealand Educational Institute (NZEI) Te Riu Roa. The summit is co-hosted ...1 week ago
- Value of stopbank project proven during cycloneA stopbank upgrade project in Tairawhiti partly funded by the Government has increased flood resilience for around 7000ha of residential and horticultural land so far, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones says. Mr Jones today attended a dawn service in Gisborne to mark the end of the first stage of the ...1 week ago
- Anzac commemorations, Türkiye relationship focus of visitForeign Affairs Minister Winston Peters will represent the Government at Anzac Day commemorations on the Gallipoli Peninsula next week and engage with senior representatives of the Turkish government in Istanbul. “The Gallipoli campaign is a defining event in our history. It will be a privilege to share the occasion ...1 week ago
- Minister to Europe for OECD meeting, Anzac DayScience, Innovation and Technology and Defence Minister Judith Collins will next week attend the OECD Science and Technology Ministerial conference in Paris and Anzac Day commemorations in Belgium. “Science, innovation and technology have a major role to play in rebuilding our economy and achieving better health, environmental and social outcomes ...1 week ago
- Comprehensive Partnership the goal for NZ and the PhilippinesPrime Minister Christopher Luxon held a bilateral meeting today with the President of the Philippines, Ferdinand Marcos Jr. The Prime Minister was accompanied by MP Paulo Garcia, the first Filipino to be elected to a legislature outside the Philippines. During today’s meeting, Prime Minister Luxon and President Marcos Jr discussed opportunities to ...1 week ago
- Government commits $20m to Westport flood protectionThe Government has announced that $20 million in funding will be made available to Westport to fund much needed flood protection around the town. This measure will significantly improve the resilience of the community, says Local Government Minister Simeon Brown. “The Westport community has already been allocated almost $3 million ...1 week ago
- Taupō takes pole positionThe Government is proud to support the first ever Repco Supercars Championship event in Taupō as up to 70,000 motorsport fans attend the Taupō International Motorsport Park this weekend, says Economic Development Minister Melissa Lee. “Anticipation for the ITM Taupō Super400 is huge, with tickets and accommodation selling out weeks ...1 week ago
- Cost of living support for low-income homeownersLocal Government Minister Simeon Brown has announced an increase to the Rates Rebate Scheme, putting money back into the pockets of low-income homeowners. “The coalition Government is committed to bringing down the cost of living for New Zealanders. That includes targeted support for those Kiwis who are doing things tough, such ...1 week ago
- Government backing mussel spat projectThe Coalition Government is investing in a project to boost survival rates of New Zealand mussels and grow the industry, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones has announced. “This project seeks to increase the resilience of our mussels and significantly boost the sector’s productivity,” Mr Jones says. “The project - ...1 week ago
- Government focused on getting people into workBenefit figures released today underscore the importance of the Government’s plan to rebuild the economy and have 50,000 fewer people on Jobseeker Support, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. “Benefit numbers are still significantly higher than when National was last in government, when there was about 70,000 fewer ...1 week ago
- Clean energy key driver to reducing emissionsThe Government’s commitment to doubling New Zealand’s renewable energy capacity is backed by new data showing that clean energy has helped the country reach its lowest annual gross emissions since 1999, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. New Zealand’s latest Greenhouse Gas Inventory (1990-2022) published today, shows gross emissions fell ...1 week ago
- Earthquake-prone buildings review brought forwardThe Government is bringing the earthquake-prone building review forward, with work to start immediately, and extending the deadline for remediations by four years, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “Our Government is focused on rebuilding the economy. A key part of our plan is to cut red tape that ...1 week ago
- Thailand and NZ to agree to Strategic PartnershipPrime Minister Christopher Luxon and his Thai counterpart, Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin, have today agreed that New Zealand and the Kingdom of Thailand will upgrade the bilateral relationship to a Strategic Partnership by 2026. “New Zealand and Thailand have a lot to offer each other. We have a strong mutual desire to build ...1 week ago
- Government consults on extending coastal permits for portsRMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop and Transport Minister Simeon Brown have today announced the Coalition Government’s intention to extend port coastal permits for a further 20 years, providing port operators with certainty to continue their operations. “The introduction of the Resource Management Act in 1991 required ports to obtain coastal ...1 week ago
- Inflation coming down, but more work to doToday’s announcement that inflation is down to 4 per cent is encouraging news for Kiwis, but there is more work to be done - underlining the importance of the Government’s plan to get the economy back on track, acting Finance Minister Chris Bishop says. “Inflation is now at 4 per ...1 week ago
- ‘To lead is to serve’ – Governor-General to call PM election in Solomon Islands
RNZ Pacific The race to form the next government of Solomon Islands could be a tight one, with no single party emerging from the election with enough seats to govern. Caretaker prime minister Manasseh Sogavare’s Our Party did the best, securing 15 out of the 50 seats in the House. ...32 mins ago - Bryce Edwards – FastTrackWatch: The Case for the Government’s Fast Track BillAnalysis by Dr Bryce Edwards, Democracy Project (https://democracyproject.nz) New Zealand Government’s Fast Track legislation. Many criticisms are being made of the Government’s Fast Track Approvals Bill, including by this writer. But as with everything in politics, every story has two sides, and both deserve attention. It’s important to understand what the Government ...2 hours ago
- NZ and Türkiye pledge cooperation during natural disasters
The two countries have "a long history of coming to each other's aid", including after the 2023 Turkish earthquakes, Winston Peters says. ...4 hours ago - Waste not, want not: New series Food Waste Kitchen turns food trash into treasure
Tara Ward talks to presenter Naomi Toilalo about the new TV show that turns food waste into a three course feast. Naomi Toilalo is standing in the warehouse at Good Neighbour Tauranga, helping unpack the two-and-a-half tonnes of rejected food that will arrive at the community support hub that day. ...4 hours ago - Vaping regulations fight 'immeasurably harder' under coalition – campaignerFocus on Politics - Successive governments have claimed crack downs on youth vaping, but the bending and breaking of rules seems pervasive. ...5 hours ago
- Dog of the month: Scout, who is so independent she could be a catScout is our latest Dog of the Month. This feature was offered as a reward during our What’s Eating Aotearoa PledgeMe campaign. Thank you to Scout’s human, Avril, for her support. Dog name: Scout (named after the little girl in To Kill a Mockingbird – she inherited the independent spirit ...6 hours ago
- ‘I don’t know if we were brave or stupid’: Megan Alatini on changing reality TVMegan Alatini takes us through her life in TV, including ‘terrible’ daytime TV, the class of Carol Hirschfeld and her most embarrassing TrueBliss moment. When she responded to a vague newspaper ad asking “do you have what it takes to be a popstar?” 25 years ago, Megan Alatini never guessed ...6 hours ago
- Behind the counter: Wellington shopkeepersA new exhibition in Wellington showcases the faces behind your local goods and services. Back in 1977, when I was a fine arts student at the University of Canterbury, I took a series of photographs of Christchurch shopkeepers. The photos were for a calendar – a project for my end ...8 hours ago
- Iranian Solidarity Group New Zealand Condemns Toomaj Salehi's Death Sentence And The New Aggres...
Toomaj and his resistance to tyranny through his songs have become an icon for the youth of Iran, so his sentence has hit the nation hard. Toomaj Salehi is not the first artist to pay the price for standing with the people. ...9 hours ago - Short story: Calf Creek, by Anna Scaife
My cousin Dylan and I spotted these big eels under the bridge that summer. We watched them lounging under the dark weed, facing into the flow of water, their mouths frozen open. Dylan and I couldn’t stop thinking about those eels. The night we went down to the creek, we ...9 hours ago - Newsroom welcomes the Secret DiaryNewsroom, home of satire. My long-running weekly satirical series The Secret Diary has moved to Newsroom and will appear every Saturday, with Victor Billot’s wildly popular satirical Odes continuing to appear every Sunday. Diaries, Odes – while serious political columnists toil at meaningful opinions and stroke their chins to an ...9 hours ago
- I saw ‘The Sign’, and it opened up my eyes: All the fuss around Bluey, explainedTara Ward unravels the many nuanced layers of a cartoon about talking dogs. This is an excerpt from our weekly pop culture newsletter Rec Room. Sign up here. It’s not often an episode of a children’s cartoon has adults sobbing into their sleeves, but that’s exactly what happened this week when ...10 hours ago
- Jessica Tater has ambition without bordersWorking as a doctor in developing countries to help communities achieve better health outcomes is nothing short of a life goal for Jessica Tater. The University of Otago medical student has her sights firmly set on joining the international humanitarian organisation Doctors Without Borders/Médecins Sans Frontières (MSF) when she qualifies ...10 hours ago
- The island where people’s stories are paramountThere’s an island in the far reaches of Auckland’s territory, sitting off the tip of the Coromandel Peninsula, 30 minutes by air from the city or four hours on the slow boat. Aotea Great Barrier is off-grid, it has a population of fewer than a thousand people … and most ...10 hours ago
- Australian author leads silence protest over ‘blood debt’ owed to PapuansAsia Pacific Report An Australian author and advocate, Jim Aubrey, today led a national symbolic one minute’s silence to mark the “blood debt” owed to Papuan allies during the Second World War indigenous resistance against the invading Japanese forces. “A promise to most people is a promise,” Aubrey said in ...11 hours ago
- Israel delays Gaza Freedom Flotilla departure with bureaucratic ‘block’Asia Pacific Report The Freedom Flotilla is ready to sail to Gaza, reports Kia Ora Gaza. All the required paperwork has been submitted to the port authority, and the cargo has been loaded and prepared for the humanitarian trip to the besieged enclave. However, organisers received word of an “administrative ...12 hours ago
- Have New Zealanders really been ‘misled’ about AUKUS, or is involvement now a foregone conclusio...ANALYSIS: By Marco de Jong, Auckland University of Technology and Robert G. Patman, University of Otago When former prime minister Helen Clark spoke out against New Zealand potentially compromising its independent foreign policy by joining pillar two of the AUKUS security pact, Foreign Minister Winston Peters responded bluntly: On ...16 hours ago
- Palestine protesters challenge TVNZ over Israeli ambassador’s ‘propaganda’Pacific Media Watch Palestine solidarity protesters today demonstrated at the Auckland headquarters of Television New Zealand, accusing the country’s major TV network of broadcasting “propaganda” backing Israel’s genocidal war on Gaza. About 50 protesters targeted the main entrance to the TVNZ building near Sky Tower and also picketed a side ...17 hours ago
- Lynley Hood Opinion – Senator Fulbright must be spinning in his grave18 hours ago
- Fast-track bill could affect NZ's reputation – Transparency InternationalThe ministers responsible for green-lighting major projects need to be open about potential conflicts of interest, says Transparency International. ...19 hours ago
- We’re all feeling the collective grief and trauma of violence against women – but this is the pr...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Anastasia Powell, Professor, Family and Sexual Violence, RMIT University It has been a particularly distressing start to the year. There is little that can ease the current grief of individuals, families and communities who have needlessly lost a loved one to men’s ...20 hours ago
- Species living closely together in symbiosis is far older and way more common than you might thinkSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Gregory Moore, Senior Research Associate, School of Ecosystem and Forest Sciences, The University of Melbourne Lichen, the first described example of symbiosis. AdeJ Artventure/Shutterstock Once known only to those studying biology, the word symbiosis is now widely used. Symbiosis is the intimate ...20 hours ago
- What is childhood dementia? And how could new research help?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Kim Hemsley, Head, Childhood Dementia Research Group, Flinders Health and Medical Research Institute, College of Medicine and Public Health, Flinders University Olena Ivanova/Shutterstock “Childhood” and “dementia” are two words we wish we didn’t have to use together. But sadly, around 1,400 ...21 hours ago
- Jobseekers get about $345 less than pensioners each fortnight. This gap is hurting, and is set to wi...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Peter Whiteford, Professor, Crawford School of Public Policy, Australian National University The government’s Economic Inclusion Advisory Committee has just published its second report. It was set up by Treasurer Jim Chalmers and Minister for Social Services Amanda Rishworth in 2022 to provide: ...21 hours ago
- Does fighting inflation always lead to recession? What NZ data tellsHere is what 60 years of New Zealand data shows us. ...22 hours ago
- The government's 20 trips abroad in AprilThe government appears committed to overseas visits with 14 ministers and MPs in 18 countries this month. ...23 hours ago
- Government unveils fetal alcohol guidelines, plan for diagnosis trainingThe government is promising to step up the response to Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, promising to boost diagnoses and raise awareness. ...23 hours ago
- Labor facing heavy defeat in Queensland, but faring better in federal pollsSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Adrian Beaumont, Election Analyst (Psephologist) at The Conversation; and Honorary Associate, School of Mathematics and Statistics, The University of Melbourne The Queensland state election will be held in October. A YouGov poll for The Courier Mail, conducted April 9–17 from a sample ...24 hours ago
- Why the potential for another Donald Trump presidency is making Iran very nervousSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Amin Naeni, PhD candidate at Alfred Deakin Institute for Citizenship and Globalisation, Deakin University There’s been much talk in recent months about what a possible second Donald Trump presidency in the United States could mean for Europe, Russia’s war in Ukraine, the ...24 hours ago
- ‘The worst piece of law proposed since 1979’: Reactions to the Fast-track Approvals BillA brief round-up of submissions on the controversial proposed law. This is an excerpt from our weekly environmental newsletter Future Proof. Sign up here. Last week, submissions on the controversial Fast-track Approvals Bill closed just hours after the government released a list of stakeholder organisations who were sent letters advising how they could ...1 day ago
- The Friday Poem: ‘Cereal giving’ by Robin PeaceA poem from Robin Peace’s new collection Detritus of Empire: feather / grass / rock. Cereal giving I see a woman’s hands, see her curious hands break a stalk as she walks through the tall prairie, the savannah, the steppe, wherever it was. See her idly bite the grass that ...1 day ago
- The Unity Books bestseller chart for the week ending April 26The only published and available best-selling indie book chart in New Zealand is the top 10 sales list recorded every week at Unity Books’ stores in High St, Auckland, and Willis St, Wellington. AUCKLAND 1 Hemingway’s Goblet by Dermot Ross (Mary Egan Publishing, $38) A handsomely produced (debossed cover, lovely ...1 day ago
- Te Rūnanga O Ngāti Whātua Welcomes Commissioner's Decision Regarding Awataha MaraeThe Commissioner's decision validates the longstanding efforts of the local community and ensures that Awataha Marae will be managed to serve the needs of the local community, particularly for hosting tangihanga. ...1 day ago
- We reconstructed landscapes that greeted the first humans in Australia around 65,000 years agoSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tristan Salles, Associate professor, University of Sydney Examples of Australian landscapes. Unsplash Seventy thousand years ago, the sea level was much lower than today. Australia, along with New Guinea and Tasmania, formed a connected landmass known as Sahul. Around this time – ...1 day ago
- What do we lose when our old suburbs disappear?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Felicity Castagna, Lecturer, Creative Writing, Western Sydney University Day Day Market, Parramatta Photo: Garry Trinh I live on the edge of Parramatta, Australia’s fastest-growing city, on the kind of old-fashioned suburban street that has 1950s fibros constructed in the post-war housing boom, ...1 day ago
- Does fighting inflation always lead to recession? What 60 years of NZ data can tell usSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michael Ryan, Teaching Fellow in Economics, University of Waikato GettyImages fatido/Getty Images There is an ongoing global debate over whether the high inflation seen in the aftermath of the COVID-19 pandemic can be lowered without a recession. New Zealand is not ...1 day ago
- After spending $700,000 on pins for Covid-19 workers, department now cutting costsA government office that set aside millions for lapel pins for pandemic workers is now looking to cut back on spending. ...1 day ago
- ‘A hell of a lot of fun’: Our reviews of Chris Isaak’s dazzling Auckland showThe ‘Wicked Game’ heartthrob is in his late 60s now. That didn’t stop him putting on a lively, goofy and very sparkly show. Apart from ‘Wicked Game’, which graces a sultry playlist of mine simply called 💋, my last sustained Chris Isaak listening session took place when I was about ...1 day ago
- The Week in Politics: Days of drama and demotionsAnalysis - Two ministers were stripped of portfolios in a warning to Cabinet, drama broke out at the Waitangi Tribunal, and the gang patch ban bill ran into opposition. ...1 day ago
- Hear me out: All I want is a TrueBliss T-shirtTara Ward makes an impassioned plea for some vital pop culture merch. In April 1999, I became obsessed with a new reality television show called Popstars. Every Tuesday night, five strangers transformed into music royalty before my very eyes as Joe, Keri, Carly, Erika and Megan were chosen to form ...1 day ago
- Solemn ANZAC dawn service at PNG’s Isurava battle memorialPNG Post-Courier In the early hours of ANZAC Day, aerial photographs captured an impressive gathering of Australians and Papua New Guineans at Isurava in the Northern (Oro) Province. The solemn dawn service yesterday was held at a site steeped in history, where some of the fiercest battles of World War ...1 day ago
- Political editors panel: A reshuffle and the fast trackListen - RNZ's Jo Moir and NZ Herald's Claire Trevett dissect the demotion of two ministers and the PM's response on Morning Report. ...1 day ago
- After-hours clinics on verge of collapse in some regionsOverworked GPs have signalled they can no longer cover, while funding is falling short. ...1 day ago
- Oranga Tamariki Axes Specialist Māori Roles, Weakens Commitment To Te Ao MāoriThe PSA is shocked that Oranga Tamariki has used the cost cutting drive to downgrade its commitment to Te Ao Māori and remove many specialist Māori roles. ...1 day ago
- China’s money only goes so far – Kokoda shows why history binds PNG and Australia in a far deepe...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Ian Kemish, Adjunct Professor, School of Historical and Philosophical Inquiry, The University of Queensland There can be no more powerful symbol of the relationship between Australia and Papua New Guinea than the prime ministers of these neighbouring countries walking together on the ...1 day ago
- We spoke to young people about sexual consent. They understand the concept, but don’t always ask i...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Andrea Waling, ARC DECRA Senior Research Fellow in Sex & Sexuality, La Trobe University BAZA Production/Shutterstock Sexual consent has been a major focus in Australia for the past few years. In early 2022 the federal government mandated consent education in ...1 day ago
- Longer-lasting ozone holes over Antarctica expose seal pups and penguin chicks to much more UVSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Sharon Robinson, Distinguished Professor and Deputy Director of ARC Securing Antarctica’s Environmental Future (SAEF), University of Wollongong, University of Wollongong Andrew Netherwood Over the last 25 years, the ozone hole which forming over Antarctica each spring has started to shrink. ...1 day ago
- Granting legal ‘personhood’ to nature is a growing movement – can it stem biodiversity loss?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Viktoria Kahui, Senior Lecturer in Environmental Economics, University of Otago Getty Images/Amy Toensing Biodiversity is declining at rates unprecedented in human history. This suggests the ways we currently use to manage our natural environment are failing. One emerging concept focuses on ...1 day ago
- Will checking character references really help you find the best candidate for a job?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Timothy Colin Bednall, Associate Professor in Management, Swinburne University of Technology marvent/Shutterstock Finding the best person to fill a position can be tough, from drafting a job ad to producing a shortlist of top interview candidates. Employers typically consider information from ...1 day ago
- A guide to Wellington’s best BYO restaurantsWondering where to host your next BYO? Whether its a small gathering or a massive party, we’ve got some recommendations. I was first introduced to the concept of BYOs at Dunedin’s India Gardens, a legendary but sadly defunct establishment, which purveyed enormous quantities of mango chicken to Aotearoa’s drunkest future ...1 day ago
- New rock art discoveries in Eastern Sudan tell a tale of ancient cattle, the ‘green Sahara’ and ...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Julien Cooper, Honorary Lecturer, Department of History and Archaeology, Macquarie University Julien Cooper The hyper-arid desert of Eastern Sudan, the Atbai Desert, seems like an unlikely place to find evidence of ancient cattle herders. But in this dry environment, my new ...1 day ago
- Paul Goldsmith starts as new Media Minister replacing sacked Melissa LeeThe media industry is "under pressure", Paul Goldsmith says, but he plans to plot a path forward as he takes up the difficult role. ...1 day ago
- Media industry sheds few tears for minister LeeThe sector says it’s hopeful her replacement Paul Goldsmith will be able to throw it a lifeline, after six months with a minister deemed missing in action, writes Catherine McGregor in this excerpt from The Bulletin, The Spinoff’s morning news round-up. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign ...1 day ago
- Is NZ bringing in 'Indonesian coal every month to keep the lights on'?Analysis: The Resource Minister said it, but is it true and why does it matter? ...1 day ago
- More spending cuts needed to stablise government finances – economistThe government can't just rely on axing public sector jobs and has to do more to cut spending, says the chief economist at a free market think tank. ...1 day ago
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“four years and they still havn’t cottoned on to me”…… dumb bastards….
He he New Zealand, you might have kept your intermediate school teachers but you are about to lose your assets …
“Fuck this feels uncomfortable, I’m sick to death of pretending to give a shit abut these subhumans.”
I’m so cool. I have seen the queen. I have given Phillip the thumbs up. I’ve got my knighthood in the bag. Stuff the teachers. My kids get a ratio of 1:16 so I’m Ok. Performance pay is for the plebs. Just as well because I might miss out. Anyway, my mates in Hawaii say the temperatures are fine. I’ll head off there as soon as poss. Dodge the media who are so stroppy at the moment. They are asking harder questions.
I am on the Methadone program.
this pic must have been taken just after a dose….
“You think I care what you write about me?”
That’s exactly the same thing you said last caption contest Pete George. Yawn!
“You want smug… I can do smug!”
Guess where I just pulled this fist out of.
hekia paratas b*m? I like guessing games..
So this is what shit smells like. No wonder people complain that the country is swimming in it.
lol
PM asleep at the wheel – no one notices.
“Come closer little ones. I have some lovely lollies for you.”
Not long now till the jobs done and I can be off home.
Super-Sized Numbers Man pulls some more from out of his arse.
Pervy PM has good night in Calendar Girls avidly watching poverty stricken students work the pole.
The 600 series had rubber skin. We spotted them easy, but these are new. They look human… sweat, bad breath, everything. Very hard to spot.
ht kyle reese
They say it got smart, a new order of intelligence. Then it saw all people as a threat, not just the ones on the other side. Decided our fate in a microsecond: extermination.
Anyone know what kind of watch that is? It looks like it’s worth at least three months worth of gross minimum wage.
Rolex I expect. That’s the hall-mark of the upwardly mobile. They don’t own “watches” like the rest of us.
See the big tik tok? Time’s up.
Hi everyone, its me the smiling assassin. If you look at my right hand you can see it is now in a permanent pistol-grip, finger on the trigger shape due to the high usage. But having no conscience allows me to keep smiling.
You do finally understand we got options on your time, don’t you?
I’ve just dropped a stinker of a budget, and it’s fun watching people quirm.
Photographer: “I said ‘laid-back’, John, not fucking comotose !!!”
We’re going to make a shit load of money from these ignorant taxpayers like we did in Ireland. 70 billion, all under my control..All I have to do is smile and wave. Let’s see, 100 million goes to Goldman sachs, then 50 million goes to …..
Photographer: “Oh Christ, you’ve been drinking again, haven’t ya, mate.”
I didn’t get where I am today by waiting for the government to put my benefit up.
“I got where I am today by pulling the ladder up behind me. Suckers!”
Fuck youuuu!
“Don’t I look spesh with my Tephlon veneer all buffed?”
Buffed? why aren’t there spatter marks on the wall behind him then?
Tick-tock, tick-tock,
Listen to the little clock.
Tick-tock, tick-tock,
Johnny is a little cock!
😀
What a smug, self satisfied tosser.
Wow, a five button general!
King cNUT
Guess who just looked at his bank statement.
Stopping the family from thriving: Legend
“Poverty… What poverty?”
Thinking : “I’m going to Europe. Must build contacts for my next job. I wonder if I hang around outside the Bilderbergers will let me in?
“The most amusing part of this job is the conspiracy theories that emanate from the Left which trouble me not in the least”.
For “conspiracy theories” read “career plan”
If the taxpayer had supported your family and paid for your education you’d be smirking too.
Stop hitting yourself
Is this the face of a front-line con-artist?
“Dush you like my new toupée?”
Why is he making his watch a feature? Normally you would pose with it half covered given the pose you have adopted.
And what is with that right arm and hand position? And the finger arrangement?
It is altogether creepy.
Who chose this out of all the photos he did in this shoot? Was this the best?
Maybe his minders have given up dressing their election prop? Maybe they know he wont be around for long.
Not only my thigh is itchy, two things…
NEW from BOLLOKA; The Banker.
Have you been living on borrowed time? Feeling interest ticking away? Now Switzerland’s finest watchmaker has the watch for you.
The Banker.
Made from steel from the same foundry that Geneva’s gnomes use to make the doors to their vaults, the Banker features a changeable front, with two patented Smugolene faces to match your moods, both smiley and wavey. The Banker comes with selective memory, that you can switch on and off just by one toss of the wrist.
Tell the world that You’ve Made It, and you’re laughing all the way to The Banker.
Bolloka Watches. Bern. London. Waikiki.
loving it ,
sharing it
the Right hand Finger is straight from the creepy Farmers Santa
“And, bachelor number 3, what’s your idea of a romantic legislative agenda?”
‘ how could ya not love me, stuff do ‘
SmirKey
What is scarier than this photo? That a PM is surrounded by idiots who think it is clever.
Smirkey gives himself a well deserved upper cut.
“Anyone wanna buy a watch” ?
“It’s not yours to sell”
“Ok, anyone wanna buy 49% of a watch”?
The watch automatically wakes me up when a NZ TV camera man appears and wants my latest winning pose. God I’m good looking.
I am the the slick, charming Wall Street salesman: I’ll steal your soul and sell it back to you! And you will thank me for it!
My credentials? I got 50,000,000 dinero out of Merrill Lynch before its Ponzi scheme went BUST!
Me and my classmates will do the same to NZ before it goes BUST!
What’s important here is a monitory system and the Bankers can’t let them fail, what would
become of me?
I’m busting to go.
Just cross ya leg a bit harder and don’t look at ya watch.
I love to look in the mirror and push my left cheek up so that I resemble Muldoon. Hope they cant tell I’m wearing Hekias g-string and its on backwards.
And on the seventh day after stuffing up an entire country moronkey rested.
This is a comment he actually made to me last year, in Lower Hutt, at a public meeting organised by Greypower,
“Don’t you worry about asset sales. It’ll all be alright.”
I kid you not.
That’s what he probably told his clients while working for Merril Lynch before the whole derivative scheme went belly up. That worries me.
Sleepy, Happy and Dopey
I want to say a funny caption, but the photo is too shite.
A smile, slightly rumpled suit and a slouch to make him look relaxed and approachable. Run of the mill so far.
The slightly lower pov to give an air of authority – at least they didn’t overdo it.
Can’t do much about the dead eyes, but a lot of people won’t notice.
But then the fist, the trigger finger and the defensive knee? Is that seriously the best they could come up with? Out of how many taken in the photo shoot? They seriously sat down and said “this is the best shot we have, it’s awesome”? My best guess would be that it was a 3news photo in the studio, he was in a bit of a hurry for it, and his minders had little control over which ones got used (or maybe didn’t see them before publication).
Horologist? Moi?
Anyone know the make of said watch?
Let’s have a gander at how accurate his time keeping is, 1975 anyone?
Believe it or not, this is as straight as he can sit. You should see what happens when he tries to lie straight in bed.
Maybe Aunty Betty bought it for him, or was that Aunty Olga, Or Aunty Helga?
“What’s the purpose of my visit to New Zealand?……..Ummm… Money..I think you guys pay me…don’t you?
John Key proves he does a better job of propping up his head than he does the economy.
How long til my knighthood, cos I cant keep up this smiling forever?