Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 2:52 pm, August 2nd, 2013 - 77 comments
Categories: caption contest - Tags:

key-caption

77 comments on “Caption contest”

  1. unclemuzza 1

    Hey kids! hands up if you have mum and dad investors as parents?

  2. Michael Nolan 2

    George Bush on the morning of 9/11

  3. Zorr 3

    “Hands up if you want to know what your teacher was Googling last night?”

  4. vto 4

    “ha ha, no your Mum is wrong, I’m not a liar” *blush*

  5. vto 5

    “oh….. *blush*……. as red as dotcom said you reckon ?”

  6. chrissy 6

    “What was the question again young man? You’re using too many big words, and complete sentences. I can’t understand the question”

  7. Jackal 7

    Key: Yes! The little subversive in the back?

    Where are the Kiwi terrorists trained by Al-Qaeda and could you show me the WMB please Mr President?

    Key: Look over there at this lovely polling kiddies…would you like to play another game to see who will resign next? I like ice cream.

  8. alwyn 8

    Well goodness me it’s young Hipkins. The truancy officer caught up with you at last.

  9. tc 9

    Whaddya mean why aren’t I at question time see you are asking me questions so THIS IS question time.

    OK next question yes thanks you whose father enjoys blogging under the handle ‘Tyranny4All’

  10. Treetop 10

    Can I get away with telling bullshit?

    You know how honest children can be.

  11. weka 11

    gawd, it’s good to be back with my peers again.

  12. fabregas4 12

    You only have half a teacher now because all the money is in private and charter schools.

  13. fabregas4 13

    Yes we only really want centre-right teachers – for too long it was the left that dominated education.

  14. sweetd 14

    …and by the time you kids are old enough to vote I will still be PM.

  15. Yeah, I used to be prime minster but i got caught lying too much so now I’m just Mr Key your new history teacher, so lets get into it – who can tell me the capital of wellington?

  16. fabregas4 16

    I’m laughing because I don’t really give a rats arse about any of you – you’re not my kids.

  17. fabregas4 17

    Yes Mrs Parata is the Minister of Education but she is so bloody useless that we don’t let her anywhere near schools.

  18. Papa Tuanuku 18

    And when you grow up, you can be an Australian too.

  19. chris73 19

    No I don’t know why I’m so popular but its a good thing

  20. King Kong 20

    Kids, Did you know that there are a bunch of sad losers on the Standard who just can’t stop thinking about me.

    • Mary 20.1

      But of course I never read what they say.

      • Mary 20.1.1

        Then how do you know they’re sad losers who can’t stop thinking about you?

        • Mary 20.1.1.1

          I honestly can’t remember.

        • Private baldric 20.1.1.2

          Greg Presland is one of the authors… guilt by association don’t you know.

          [lprent: Baldric, baldric… Yes I remember, should be dead. Will shortly be a silent zombie unless there is a change in behaviour.

          If I see you start that crap again then you will be permanently banned. I am a whole lot less tolerant about silly games towards authors.

          Are you quite clear on that? ]

    • Murray Olsen 20.2

      Yes, the sad losers worship me. The monkey one even names his fleas after me. The others are subversives.

  21. rod 21

    Mr Key, can we play I Spy, my mum says you are an expert at it.

  22. BLiP 22

    Hello underclass. Hands up whose mummy or daddy has a job . . .

  23. chris73 23

    Yes thats right kids there is a good chance that you’ll have left school before Labour are back in power

  24. Old Ted 24

    Please put your hand up if you think your dad is a terrorist.

  25. jaymam 25

    Hey kids! Wanna see this centrefold of Vance?

  26. Postie 26

    He-He-He my mates will be making $10k each out of you little focker soon He-He-he

  27. Blue 27

    PM: Hands up who knows who David Shearer is?

  28. Blue 28

    PM explains what polls are. Now all those voting Labour put your hands up.

  29. peterlepaysan 29

    You all know how to play “I Spy with my little eye?”

    Let me show you my way of playing that game.

    It is called “protecting John’s back”.

  30. rob 30

    That’s an interesting question
    Yes, how did I get to be worth $50M and yet my company
    still managed to go tits up?

  31. mac1 31

    “Your teacher introduced me as the eponymous reader of this book. Hands up if you know whatever that means.”

  32. georgecom 32

    Now kids, shall we read some more of Peter Dunnes emails?

  33. Arfamo 33

    Yes I know sometimes I use the wrong words on tv but that doesn’t mean I’m an ignorotamus.

  34. georgecom 34

    Yes kids, if you do work hard at school ou may get a job in my personal spy agency.

  35. Akldnut 35

    This is the smile I use when I know the commoners don’t believe my lies, it works a real treat.

    I taught the rest of my party how to do it, just keep an eye out for Hekia, Paula, Simon Bridges or Nick Smith when they’re talking bullshit to the media or screwing the underclass.

  36. georgecom 36

    Yes kids, if you do work hard at school you may get a job in my personal spy agency.

  37. BrucetheMoose 37

    “…the end. Well, I’m glad you liked my story telling kids, I get plenty of practice as Prime Minister.”

  38. woodpecker 38

    The PM just sat there……wondering who fucked him? Who was it that leaked? Later that evening a lone private jet left AKL with a small hunched man and a group of heavy set men ( wearing sunglasses) on a one way flight to Hawaii ………………….fin.

  39. Jackal 39

    By the time you reach intermediate kiddies, under a National government well all be $208 billion in debt. Anybody got a spare kidney to sell?

  40. the pigman 40

    “Can anyone tell me who stuck this enlarged version of Labour’s 1999 pledge card under the white board?”

  41. Jackal 41

    That’s the end of our economic slavery lesson for today kids. Now lets sing the National anthem: Oh, say! can you see by the dawn’s early light…

  42. key:..’do you kids know..that by the time you grow up…the state will know absolutely everything about you..?..’

    phillip ure..

  43. keys’ stunned-mullet reactions to the news (whispered in his ear) that david cunnliffe has just replaced david shearer as leader of labour..

    ..(heard to mutter under his breath:..’oh shit..!’..he then pretends nothing is wrong/has happened..

    ..and goes on to read the storybook to the school-children..

    ..and just ignores the baying-media at the schoolhouse door….)

    phillip ure..

  44. key:..’how many of you kids are in the permanent-underclass..?’

    phillip ure..

  45. key:..”..do you kids know that i am doing all i can to make sure you grow up to live in a third world/low-wage/surveillance-state..?..”

    phillip ure..

  46. key:..’why am i smiling and laughing/so happy..?

    ..i am just thinking how expendable you all are..

    ..you are all just the children of pissant-peasants..

    ..and you will all grow up to be pissant-peasants..

    ..if i get my way..

    ..they don’t call me the smiling-assasin for nothing..eh..?’

    phillip ure..

  47. key:..’i grew up in a state house too..

    ..just like the ones i am throwing your families out of…’

    phillip ure..

  48. key:..’boo..!..i’m the chief-spook..!’.

    ..scary..eh..?..’

    phillip ure..

  49. key:.’have you kids heard what i have been doing to the new zealand economy and environment..?

    ..no..?..that’s good..!’..

    phillip ure..

  50. ruup 50

    Ewww, was that you?

  51. key:

    “i’m rich..and you’re not..haha!..”

    phillip ure..

  52. key:

    “..hello kids..ackshully i’m here to present you all with the invoices for your futures..”

    phillip ure..

  53. See, not all dictators are scary

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