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LolKeys

Written By: - Date published: 4:46 pm, November 10th, 2008 - 77 comments
Categories: humour - Tags:

Hat tip: Sam Vilain

77 comments on “LolKeys”

  1. Lew 1

    This’ll be the first of many.

    L

  2. Vinsin 2

    oh yai! Fun times ahead.

  3. now now guys, lets not stoop to Farrars level.

  4. Tara 4

    Could someone PLEASE decrypt Key’s jargon ?

  5. Tane 5

    kitno: It’s just a bit of fun bro. Start pulling us up when we’re replaying videos of him tripping over in a shopping mall.

  6. Lampie 6

    Let us hope, he never never never has to give a speech at the UN or talk to the Yanks

  7. Lew 7

    Lampie: Or APEC, where he wants to represent us on his maiden voyage as PM, next week? (Which is a good call, in my view).

    L

  8. Janet 8

    Stephen Franks, Jim Mora and Brian Edwards are all having a moan on National Radio about Franks not being elected in Wellington Central – and blaming the Standard!. It was the nasty lefties’ fault, nothing to do with his homophobia (what homophobia?)

  9. Ok Tane, fair enough.

    Can any one comment on why there appears to be a complete purge of all historical mentions of Winston Peters? I’m trying to find the post where Farrar derides, what he calls an ‘unusual constitutional setup’ or something, about how the government shouldn’t be having ministers outside of cabinet.

  10. Franks wasn’t elected to Wellington Central because the people didn’t want him elected. It’s called democracy and is something Franks is going to have to come to terms with eventually.

  11. Felix 12

    How adorable, a kitten and a little ethnic kid.

  12. bobo 13

    Yeah the election is over can we be spared the cutesy campaign stuff now..

  13. bobo 14

    Prediction – Key gets rolled by English while overseas on trip to Apec 😛

  14. Lampie 15

    “How adorable, a kitten and a little ethnic kid’

    Did the kid get the Lockwood pass test?

    “Lampie: Or APEC, where he wants to represent us on his maiden voyage as PM, next week? (Which is a good call, in my view).”

    Think he needs your skills Lew.

  15. Monty 16

    I am sure the new incoming National / Act Ministers appreciate the new BMWs that have hadly been run in yet.

    Of course a BMW wil be a step up for John – I think he drives a commodore although he could of course dfrive any car he wants.

  16. Shona 17

    Thanks you guys!!! You’ve kept an old leftie sane over the last couple of weeks. And now I’ve had my first chuckle in 4 days. Steve Braunias in the SST was a giggle too.
    Never thought I’d have to get out and campaign for MMP …. AGAIN! Keep up the Great Work.

  17. Lampie 18

    “Prediction – Key gets rolled by English while overseas on trip to Apec”

    Ah damn, had $50 on English just before Xmas

  18. bobo 19

    Lampie – I didn’t say which year though 🙂

  19. John 20

    Bobo – do you think it could be more embarrassing if photos of Helen holding a pussy were published?
    LOL

  20. Lampie 21

    haha bobo, yes I would be pushing hard for 2008 (patience, you must learn patience)

  21. Lampie 22

    John, no

    It is our turn to poke fun at YOU!!!!

  22. bobo 23

    John – hehe yeah I dunno who’s bright idea it was to take the photo op but politicians should never work with animals n children , 100% cheese 🙂

  23. John 24

    Lampie. Well I thought you guys had been for the last 9 years anyway. My taxes were so high they could only have been a sick joke

  24. TimeWarp 25

    I hope the Standard doesn’t become the KiwiBlog of the left for the next 3 years. It has been home to reasoned debate of fact, policy and issues. It’s cheap to take a shot, it will be hard work holding the government accountable.

  25. Tane 26

    TimeWarp, as I said to my bro Kitno, it’s a bit of fun. Let the jokers have a laugh, there’s plenty of time for analysis and action.

  26. Alexandra 27

    The affable guy routine is already an embarrassment. Is he acting goofy or is he actually goofy. Tonight on the news Key and English arrive early for coalition talks with media at the ready. Key goofs his way through while English clears out of the room quickly and returns when he realises Key didnt follow him out. English is viewed peering thru the glass door while Key eventually figures it out and leaves.
    It was a minor moment but suggests a serious lack cohesion and trust between the two men. English should have stayed and supported key through the Media comment or waited for key to initiate the next move, instead of ducking for cover.

  27. Lampie 28

    My taxes were so high

    Another myth in the making.

    Define right level then, define too low, then go to the IRD and ask them to go through ALL the models that they have

  28. Lampie 29

    typical right wing individualist thinking

  29. bobo 30

    Alexandra – I love it how Wodney kept Key waiting coming up the stairs , i’m sure it was a calculated entrance by him, almost dancing with the stars drama like, did anyone ever track down the women he asked to sit in her seat directly behind Winston at the privileges committee, was just curious.

  30. Monty 31

    Does John Drive a Commodore?

  31. Monty 32

    I wonder if you guys will give John Key any sort of break and give him a few months to see how he pans out as Prime Minister.

    Or will your ideaological distatse of anything to the right of the Labour / Greenies mean that any thing he says does, mutters, dresses walks, looks, meets, writes, answers, will be immediate cause for derission. If that is the case then I suggest you get a life.

    John Key has inherited a very difficult economy, and to get through the tough times ahead, this new National Government is going to have to make some very hard calls. How bad a state is the economy really in – or is that something you do not want to know about? Or the day after the new Natonal Government is sworn in will you be blaming him for the state of the economy.

    The negative campaign was a major contributing factor to Labour’s Loss. Maybe the straategy going forward is to try and be a bit more positive and constructive?

  32. TimeWarp 33

    Wheeling out excuses already Monty? 😉

    I primarily want to see whether he keeps his promises. Nothing unfair about that.

  33. Lew 34

    Monty: As far as I’m concerned, if he can see his way through the coming years without fucking up the economy, selling off the family silver, sending anyone to the poorhouse, getting us embroiled in any foreign wars, causing deep demographic or ethnic rifts, subsuming our national sovereignty to any third party groups (governments or corporates), going back on a bunch of his promises, or ruining the future of NZ democracy, he fully deserves to be PM.

    I don’t mean this in a cynical way at all. He’s got a huge job ahead of him, and if he’s up to it, more power to him.

    L

  34. Shona 35

    Monty Get a grip!! Labour’s negative campaign I am so tired of this mantra! The economy is in better shape than it was in 1984,1990 and 1999. thanks to Cullen’s stewardship.The much vaunted “third way”Same system of steady responsible management Blair used in the UK. Foreign business analysts describe NZ’s economy as “being very sound” and” well placed to weather the storm” I suggest you start reading the business pages.We are at the beginning of the biggest Global economic collapse since 1929 due to the irresponsible right wing free market policies of the USA ,the huge tax cuts given by Bush administration to his scumbag corporate mates,and Cheney’s gouging of the US Treasury to fund the illegal Iraq invasion. If you are willing to be educated and informed I have a list of book titles worth reading on the subject.None of what is happening is news to me nor is the the weak ruse of inheriting a poor economy . IT IS LIE! Pray for a wet summer for the Dairy farmers and NZ will be insulated from the worst of it. We are one drought away from serious social decline as we have an incompetent leader. Or hadn’t you worked that out yet? He was a currency speculator for Merril Lynch who are now bankrupt. He wouldn’t know which way the ground is pointing.

  35. QoT 36

    He can have exactly as much of a break as Helen Clark was given.

    What’s that, Lassie? Headlines screaming “BUSINESS CONFIDENCE PLUMMETS” within days of Labour gaining power in 99? He may pleasantly surprise us, sure, but if he wasn’t ready to be PM he shouldn’t have kept assuring us he was.

  36. John 37

    “typical right wing individualist thinking”

    Yeah, what a selfish b’stard. Here I was thinking if I studied and then worked real hard in life I could make something for my me and my family, but I see your point. thats just soooooo selfish. If I finally own a business then create more jobs for more people thats just soooo selfish – I’m just a lousy capitalist and only think about the harder and smarter you work, the more you advance…..but nope – you’ve got me!!! People like me – the job creators should leave the country – or stay and share our hard earned dollars with the parasites!

    you make a strong case Lampie. I’m only glad the majority really understood your thinking last Saturday

  37. Monty 38

    Why exactly did business confidence dip early after the election in 1999? Maybe it had something to do with the anti-business policies of the Labour Government. They had left wingnut partners such as the now defunct Alliance – Anderton being the only relic of that error and it was a vengeful government – determined to implement policies that would have plumeted the country into recession had it not been for the wonderful ad solid economic foundations laid by Ruth, Jenny and of course the 1984 to 1987 Labour Government.

    So concerned was Clark about her policies she held a conference with Business where business outlined the economic impacts of their policies. Labour at that point severly moderated their anti-business agenda.

    What mess has Cullen left the economy in this time that will require firm action. How bad is the economy that Cullen has left in his wake. I supppose over the coming weeks we will find out how much Cullen has squandered the good years.

  38. mike 39

    “Maybe the straategy going forward is to try and be a bit more positive and constructive?”

    Are you kidding Monty – Lefties are born bitter and naturally hate everything above them and patronise everything below them.

    [lprent: Please read my new post. The section at the bottom refers to you.]

  39. Pascal's bookie 40

    Monty,

    Assume Key lives up to his campaign rhetoric. Those ‘hard choices’ that he makes end up being to abandon right wing adventurism in favour of Keynesian orthodoxy.

    I’m guessing the rabid right, will have all sorts of things to say. I doubt they’ll be original, but you mock the right you have, not the right you wish you had.

    My guesses for what they call John the Moderate’s shiny new Keynesian National Party are:

    National in Name Only (NINO), BlueCommunists, National Socialists (too easy), and Snifters.

    The Thatcherite ‘wets’ goes without saying.

    I look forward to seeing you defending him, and explaining that he did what he had to do. It would have been stupid to cut spending. Social spending levels needed to be raised, and so on and so forth.

  40. mike 41

    Imprent – you spelt anti-socialists wrong
    Lighten up a little too.

  41. keith 42

    “What mess has Cullen left the economy in this time that will require firm action. How bad is the economy that Cullen has left in his wake. I supppose over the coming weeks we will find out how much Cullen has squandered the good years.”

    hahahahaaaahh you are a complete muppet aintcha Monty!! Now we’ve got the dipshit from dipton back as finance minister things are gonna be just peachy! A dunce who so quickly fucked up the portfolio the first time he took it that Bill Birch had to take it back in less than a year!

    A cretin of your calibre is such a liability to the right that you’d be doin them a huge favour by s.t.f.u.

    Also, Cullen was a fucking great keynsian minister, take off your inverse reality goggles, noddy.

    [lprent: Tell me have you been taking lessons from the trolls of the right? Read the policy]

  42. Mary-Ann 43

    This group of Nazis haven’t wasted any time!

    Use Roger Douglas’ expertise say Business Roundtable group

    http://www.3news.co.nz/News/BusinessNews/Use-Roger-Douglas-expertise-say-Business-Roundtable-group/tabid/421/articleID/79176/cat/52/Default.aspx

    The new National Party-led government should draw on the expertise of Sir Roger Douglas, according to the New Zealand Business Roundtable.

    Prime Minister-elect John Key is meeting ACT leader Rodney Hide and United Future leader and the party’s sole MP Peter Dunne today.
    Business has welcomed the election of a centre-right government and market traders are relieved there is a clear result.

    Mr Key has ruled out ACT MP Roger Douglas being a minister but Mr Hide has said the issue is not dead.

    Bill English, who is expected to be finance minister, said there would be no cabinet position for Sir Roger but the Government would be open to advice from a wide range of people, Radio New Zealand reported.

    Business Roundtable executive director Roger Kerr said he did not want to get into the debate about cabinet positions, but Sir Roger should be called on to help with the current economic crisis.

    “There is a lot of nonsense about extreme policies,” he said.

    A number of Sir Roger’s policies had been tinkered with but they were still largely in place. Sir Roger was an extremely experienced person whose expertise ought to be drawn on.

    “It is high time that Roger’s role was recognised as almost saving the economy so to speak and he would have a lot to contribute in the current environment.”

    The roundtable has congratulated Mr Key on his conclusive victory in the election.

    The roundtable wants policies to improve productivity and address the country’s large current account deficit.

    It is in favour of privatisation and freeing up the private sector to undertake commercial activity to grow the economy.

    “We’d say it is fiscal policy and regulatory policies that should be the top priorities,” said Mr Kerr.

    “The last thing we should be doing at the moment is following these ideas that have been doing the rounds of spending up yet further. That is a sort of mistaken Keynesian idea,” he said.

  43. Tamaki resident 44

    killinginthenameof back at 6:02pm – look at his archives for Oct 2005 – there are several posts where he quotes the Cabinet Manual. ACT’s press releases in the same month are also interesting.

  44. QoT 45

    Oh, Monty. Thanks for making my point for me – if Labour deserved no “break” because of their “anti-business policies”, then John Key, pay-no-attention-to-the-policies-behind-the-curtain certainly doesn’t.

  45. Lew 46

    KITNO: Re Ministers outside cabinet, today John Key has said they’re a good idea (despite criticising them as a strange constitutional anomaly for the past three years) because they allow heterodox politicians to criticise the government while still serving it.

    It’s convenient and self-serving to change his tune now, but I agree with him. It’s MMP in practice.

    L

  46. Mike 47

    Key’s first action as PM will be to skip the country leaving Bill English in charge. If that’s not foreshadowing I don’t know what is.

  47. Felix 48

    You reckon that was Key’s idea or English’s?

  48. bill brown 49

    Maybe he thinks being minister of tourism means lots of free trips overseas.

  49. “Lew
    It’s convenient and self-serving to change his tune now, but I agree with him. It’s MMP in practice.
    L”

    Same here, I don’t have a problem the arrangement, just seems like a classic “it’s ok when we do it”

  50. “Monty
    November 10, 2008 at 8:13 pm

    Does John Drive a Commodore?”

    2 by the looks, unimpressed, considering what he can afford, you’d think he would have slightly better taste than that, perhaps something European?

  51. Join "Goff 2011" on Facebook 52

    I still can’t make out what the damned text on the picture says.

    The problem with being born in the 70s I suppose…

  52. I wonder if you guys will give John Key any sort of break and give him a few months to see how he pans out as Prime Minister.

    I’m sure if we look back through your comments over the last few months, we wont find one sympathetic comment for Helen Clark. And comments from the KBR tended more to be about Helen’s face, teeth, billboard photo, or rich pricks rather than any substantive policy difference – maybe excepting tax prior to Nats tax plans being released.

    The centre-left currently should aim to keep its achievements intact, and so any time NUFACT decides to invoke hard conservative or libertarian rhetoric or policies, you can be sure that the Standard will keep them disHONEST.

  53. Join "Goff 2011" on Facebook 54

    Actually, I think we really ought to save our serious attacks for his coalition partners in a few months when cracks appear in his team. Key is a crass buffoon with little political nous. He’ll dig his own grave.

    Still, an odd shovel-full here and there won’t hurt us.

  54. reid 55

    Lefties really are little children aren’t they? Too immature even to recognise their own failings they lash out at others – ooh it was an evil biased media, ooh it was an awful conservative conspiracy against poor widdle Winston.

    No recognition of reality.

    Hey lefties, this is why you lost. You’re fucked in the head. You don’t understand life, people, societies or economics. In addition, you come across as arrogant – you appear to really imagine you alone have the heart and wisdom to realise “justice’ in this fallen world.

    You seem to think you deserve to win because you’re such super people with such pure humanitarian motives. That’s why you never criticised the abrogation of fair play represented by the EFA, because it was for the cause and everything is justified by the cause.

    You stupid pricks haven’t even learned the elementary fact of life – that the secret to life is giving others meaningful value so that they can then transfer that value to others along the way. You teach someone how to fish and they will teach others. You give someone a fish and they will eat it and ask for another. By denying them this you degrade their humanity and prevent them from obtaining meaning in their lives by giving them the ability to help others and furthermore, you treat them like an idiot so they think they are.

    Lefties do this all the fucking time the world over and for a short time people appreciate the fish. Problem is the only way lefties can get the fish is by taking it off others because they’re too fucking stupid to pull it in themselves (i.e. lefties never actually grow any economy they control because they focus almost entirely on redistributing the fish rather than helping people who are good at catching it to catch even more. Lefties appear to imagine that situation would be weally weally awful because that would mean those awful tewwible people would have far too many fish and we can’t have that can we. That wouldn’t be super at all.)

    Moving away from fish to just one of many examples from the real world, where is the education system after nine years of you? Fucking nowhere you stupid fuckhead losers. I bet Te Tiriti is a big part of it but where are the business courses? Nowhere. Lots of courses however on how to get along with others and how to avoid thinking you’re a fucking loser. Yeh that’ll really help people when they start learning how to compete in the real world. Oh right, that’s another maxim from lefty philosophy isn’t it. There are no losers. Hey fuckheads, what’s the point of lying to school children about the way the world works? Isn’t that really really really cruel and indeed, evil? Of course it is.

    When things turn to shit as they have, lefties have no answer, simply because the only thing they know how to do is to re-distribute. If no-one else is creating the wealth, they have no fucking ideas at all. That’s why you were dumped you execrats, the country doesn’t trust you because it knows we’re heading into some serious shit where there’s not going to be too many fucking fish and the last thing we wanted was to have a bunch of lefties at the helm giving us no fresh perspectives but still more of the same. Cullen has known about this for several years, bet on it. What has he done? Nothing. Case closed. You lost not because of the media, not because of Hulun’s laughably flawed campaign strategy (snigger), it was because you just don’t get life. You’re actually the worst people in the world, you arrogant naive fuckhead moron fucks.

    Kind regards,
    reid

    [lprent: Despite appearances this is not a graffitti troll. Previous comments have been rational.]

  55. gingercrush 56

    Sheesh why the pity attacks on each others. The election is done and dusted. For the right they need to work out how to keep power. For the left they have to re-organise.

    The left need to stop expecting a National led government to stuff up. It may happen but in New Zealand we tend to keep governments for more than one term. We don’t know if that will happen in this case. But I do suggest that rather than waiting for National to stuff up. Why not organise yourselves on policy and strategies to get back in power.

    For National and Act and United Future. It would not take a big swing back to the centre-left for them to regain power in 2011.So make sure policies are on the right track to get the voters that voted in 2008 for them to vote Centre-right again.

  56. Dean 57

    Policy Parrot:

    “And comments from the KBR tended more to be about Helen’s face, teeth, billboard photo, or rich pricks rather than any substantive policy difference”

    And comments from this site and the left tended to be more about how slippery and untrustworthy Key is, rather than anything actually grounded in reality – just like the much lauded neutron bomb, it failed to deliver.

    There’s an old saying about people in glass houses with stones in their hand, PP, and you really ought to think about it before you get in the saddle of your high horse again.

  57. Wow Ried, that’s like 3 years of worth of kiwiblog’s hatred, misinformation, delusions and lies all wrapped up into one post, what a pity that reality entirely contradicts what your claiming, then again given your perspective of reality we can hard blame you. Oh and limiting educational opportunities is a policy of the right, helps them keep themselves and their families in positions of privilege.

  58. r0b 59

    Hey lefties, this is why you lost. You’re fucked in the head. You don’t understand life, people, societies or economics. In addition, you come across as arrogant

    What a gem! I think I’ll get it printed and framed.

  59. Vinsin 60

    Ried, next time you write a comment on here can you use something other than fish. Seriously while i was reading your comment i kept feeling hungry, which meant i couldn’t give your fine penmanship the attention it deserves. Maybe next time you could use a pie, or a cake – oh see know i’m getting hungry again. Oh, tell you what, i’m allergic to nuts, use nuts in your next comment.

  60. Ari 61

    Keith- while monty may see things differently than you, that’s no excuse for behaving so poorly. I’d say “grow up”, but I know from experience that doing so simply doesn’t work for everyone to gain the maturity they need 😛

    Why exactly did business confidence dip early after the election in 1999? Maybe it had something to do with the anti-business policies of the Labour Government. They had left wingnut partners such as the now defunct Alliance – Anderton being the only relic of that error and it was a vengeful government – determined to implement policies that would have plumeted the country into recession had it not been for the wonderful ad solid economic foundations laid by Ruth, Jenny and of course the 1984 to 1987 Labour Government.

    Perhaps it did. Perhaps it didn’t. But if Key slips up at the beginning of his term, wouldn’t it be equally as fair to be judgemental of his policies and leadership in the same way? Let’s face it Monty- we have a fundamental disagreement on economics. The Left thinks we should spend more during a downturn, the Right thinks we should spend less. If we lose our economic momentum that is all that’s keeping us from REALLY feeling this global recession, then I hope you’ll be ready to admit that something went wrong.

  61. keith 62

    Keith- while monty may see things differently than you, that’s no excuse for behaving so poorly. I’d say “grow up’, but I know from experience that doing so simply doesn’t work for everyone to gain the maturity they need

    fuck off! 🙂

    [lprent: Banned 2 weeks. Read the policy. I’m always happy to increase it if you want to argue.]

  62. John 63

    Mike “I know what I’m doing” Williams has just declared a $100,000 donation from fishing magnate Peter Vela yet disclosed this after the election. Labour also received $60,000 from the EPMU yet disclosed this before the election.
    Both donations were apparently received on the same day.
    Is he working for the National party?
    What is really impressive is the fact that he is clinging on to his directorships. Employment with Owen Glenn beckons.

  63. GNZ 64

    Labour lost because
    1) as Steve Pierson noted they spent political capital on very expensive low return projects like the anti smacking bill. Either a bad assessment of the political cost or a bad assessment of the value of the law.
    2) The attacks on key. They effectively advertised Key, without sticking much mud to the Teflon boy. (I might put this down to being out of touch with the views of swing voters).
    3) Poor advertising – take a leaf from the green booklet – the Mary add was particularly bad and depressing. It amazes me that parties in NZ have such mediocre ads and billboards.
    4) too much defense of Winston – no issue with not firing him – but why spend political capital actively defending the anti-asian immigration man? And getting Glen upset…

    Whoar also raises an interesting option of selling Cullen as the man for a crisis. Risky – but much better than just negative campaigning against Key.

  64. GNZ 65

    Vinsin,
    I think it may have said something about left leaning governments not being able to deal with great depressions….

  65. Lampie 66

    “you make a strong case Lampie. I’m only glad the majority really understood your thinking last Saturday”

    What a great comeback, take your little bleeding heart act to kiwiblog. You shelfishly went on about taxes are too high. No compelling argument on why, just your individualist thinking.

    Education is within reach because of the last administration. This country IS one of the best business environments to start and operate SMEs hence why we have a very high number of entrepreneurs compared with most countries. You will find that in your OECD stats!!!!

    Don’t tell me about business as I will shove my commerce degree up your arse!!!

    Good on you for taking up/doing studies though. Take advantage of the loans scheme if you are working full time and doing part time studies, this spreads out payments over the years for you with slight admin cost of $50 (might be cheaper with paying up front depending on fees)

  66. Dear Reid,

    Wow, that was a lot of anger.
    I hope that after your rant you feel a whole lot better because it looked like you had a lot of pain and frustration pent up in that head of yours.

    Also from your writing it seems you are very scared and you have every reason to be because we are heading for a terribly scary time. We are heading for a depression far more dangerous and deep than the 1929 recession. In fact you might find that we are heading for the collapse of the US empire leaving us stranded on an island very far from the rest of the world.
    You might find that export will cease, money will dry up totally and tourism (Is John Key really going to be the minister of Tourism? Well be prepared for rich pricks to buy up great swaths of land) will be a thing of the past. No more stuff coming in and no more stuff going out. Very scary indeed.

    So while your all relieved and happy about having dumped that heavy load let’s see who created the economic hardship that is coming our way.

    Let’s start with the first possible culprit you point at: Labour and more specifically Cullen because he according to you knew about it three years ago.
    Three years ago when I first arrived here my husband and I decided not to buy property and go off the grid because we saw the writing on the wall and since I have to assume that if a little person like me can see it coming a man like Cullen and even more so an intelligent women such as Helen Clark must surely have known. What could they have done about it?

    Well, they could have been frugal, Oh oops they were. No big tax cuts for the rich like in the US. (Does it mean the rich got poorer and the poor richer under Labour well actually no, the rich grew richer and the poor poorer under Labour though so your fish thingy goes a tad awry there. This is a rapport on income distribution in NZ I found, it’s from 2004 but it hasn’t gone any better fro the workers who’s job’s went overseas so I think it only went down hill from there.)

    They could save our tax dollars so when the time came they could make sure the workers and little people of this country were protected, Ooh oops they did.

    They could have public free healthcare in place so the little people could afford to see a doctor too when they needed it, Ooh oops they did.

    So you can’t really blame Labour.

    So what did cause the coming collapse of our financial system, if it wasn’t Labour or this countries workers?

    Well, it started with the subprime crisis. Somewhere along the line banks decided that is would be a good idea to give money to people who had no money to pay back their loans. That started around about 1987-1988.

    And while they gave money they created out of thin air to poor people to buy houses they collected those mortgages and told dimwits like New Zealand investments firm owners that they could buy slices of the derivatives they created on top off that and told them that this was a good idea because “house prices would always go up” (remember that one?)

    So banks created this crisis and who have we voted in? Ooh oops John Key.
    One of those selfsame bankers who was involved in exactly the trade which is causing the financial collapse.
    John Key who headed a department in Merrill Lynch in the late nineties which developed innovative and complex new products.

    John Key who was shocked at Merrill Lynch’s exposure to the subprime crisis in October 2007 and didn’t get back to Cullen about it in order to save NZ in a bipartisan way.

    John Key who never created any wealth other than parasitical money creation out of thin air.

    John Key who thinks nothing of almost collapsing his own countries currency and to lie about it twenty years later.

    You know what Reid? If Cullen was supposed to know that I’m sure John Key was in an even better position to know what was coming. Hell, he was at the very root of it. So what you reckon should he have done something to prevent it from happening? Or is he exempt from having to deal with the consequences of his own behaviour.

    And for those of you thinking that I accuse John Key from being the sole perpetrator of the subprime crisis, think again. No, of course JK was not the sole perp but he was heading the department of debt from one of the most aggressive parasitical subprime and derivative banks ever.

    Nice to know that the fox is going to run the hen house, eh Reid?

  67. Lampie 68

    travellerev, was Mr Key ever self-employed during his career in the money industry? or just worked for others?

  68. theodoresteel 69

    travellerev,

    “somewhere along the line” = when the “leftie” Clinton Administration told them to.

    So it WAS a leftie’s fault!

    You can’t blame a market for a faliure caused by regulation.

  69. Lampie,

    He was the managing director of debt, Global head of foreign exchange and European head of bonds and derivatives. That is an awesome level of seniority in a bank such as Merrill Lynch and with it comes a huge level of responsibility and control over it’s finances. He was not the boss of Merrill Lynch but in his position and as an upon invitation only advisor to the Federal Reserve of New York it is save to say he knew exactly what he was doing and how it would pan out in the end.

    It was the same speculative bubble/burst mechanism that caused the first great depression after all.

  70. theodoresteel,

    You are absolutely right about the Glass Steagall act being repealed in 1998 under Clinton.
    As far as I’m concerned the Dems and the GOP are just two head of the same dragon though. Nothing lefty about Clinton. Just another pawn for the banksters and the military industrial complex.

  71. The joke’s all wrong, anyway – John’s already had access to the BMWs, as leader of the opposition – and used them 5% more in the last year than our outgoing PM herself.

  72. theodoresteel,

    Of course you can blame the scheisters who lobbied for neigh on 11 years spending between 100 to 200 million dollars to have the act repealed so they could go on a rampage. They are nasty, greedy and dangerous individuals who for their own greedy benefit destroyed our economies, waged two wars and made a killing in the process.

    And we just put one of them in power.

  73. Matthew Pilott 74

    reid, not that such a comment deserves a response, but I’ll give a short one.

    Your analogy used ‘fish’, showing that redistributive politics get people fed, and that’s it. I don’t imagine that you actually believe this to be the case, as it was an analogy. So what if you used something like… doctor visits. Redistribution doing something that increases productivity, reduces long-term costs and means those who ‘create the weath’ have a wealthier society to which they can sell goods and services, and a healthier population which will better be able to be gainfully employed.

    I could give another dozen examples that illustrate the same if you need them – and I think you do.

    I reckon you haven’t spent a lot of time thinging about any of this, your whole comment (17-year-old tantrum vitriol ignored) was exceedingly one-dimensional and simplistic.

    With much sympathy,

    Matthew Pilott

  74. Ianmac 75

    Travellev: Again an interesting simplified run-down, that I can understand. (I cannot think that Reid would read it as he is not able to be objective. When I stripped away Reid’s invective there was nothing much left except Key-like slogans.)
    It will be interesting if History will eventually enlighten the populance in a credible way ?

  75. Ianmac 76

    Travellev: By the way, I paste your assessments onto my own file because it would be a pity for it to be lost in the archives. In due course they could be valuable.

  76. Lombear 77

    Reid, Reid, Reid… (Comment: November 11, 2008 at 12:30 am)

    Wow! us Lefties are arrogant? You should really re-read your own rant.
    Anyone would think your man, your saviour hadn’t won, anyone would think you didn’t get just exactly what you wanted.
    Hmmm not very gracious of you.
    Please come back and comment when your right-wing ‘fishing teachers’ have lost the next election. Because I’d looove to hear how angry you are when you don’t get what you want.

    Hugs

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    1 day ago
  • Cowboy clampers will be stymied
    Clayton Mitchell, Spokesperson for Consumer Affairs The ‘wheel clamping’ Bill that will cap clamper fees to $100 passed its third reading in Parliament today. New Zealand First welcomes The Land Transport (Wheel Clamping) Amendment Bill to combat predatory wheel clamping behaviour in what is currently a largely unregulated business. Cowboy clampers are: gouging ...
    2 days ago
  • Mental Health Commission back on track
    Jenny Marcroft, Spokesperson for Health New Zealand First welcomes the passage of the Mental Health and Wellbeing Commission Bill through its first reading in Parliament. “Today’s progress takes serious action on the mental health and addiction crisis the country is facing,” says New Zealand First Health Spokesperson Jenny Marcroft. “The re-establishment ...
    2 days ago
  • New Zealand’s key assets are not for sale: national interest test delivered
    Mark Patterson, Spokesperson for Primary Industries Today the Government announced the delivery of the promise to protect New Zealand interests by applying a new National Interest Test to the sales of our most sensitive and high risk assets to overseas buyers. This further strengthening of the Overseas Investment Act will ...
    3 days ago
  • National interest test added to protect New Zealanders’ interests
    The Coalition Government is delivering on its promise to protect New Zealanders’ interests by applying a new national interest test to the sales of our most sensitive and high-risk assets to overseas buyers. Under current Overseas Investment Act (OIA) rules, assets such as ports and airports, telecommunications infrastructure, electricity and ...
    3 days ago
  • Electoral law breach allegations
    Rt Winston Peters, Leader of New Zealand First Allegations raised this morning by Stuff Limited / Fairfax concern a party matter but I am confident that New Zealand First has operated within electoral laws, now and for the last 27 years. Declarable donations were declared to the Electoral Commission. Our ...
    3 days ago
  • Wayne Brown hits back at critics: Ports of Auckland has to move
    The chairman of the Upper North Island Supply Chain Strategy (UNISCS) working group, Wayne Brown, has hit back at critics of his group’s recommendations to relocate the Ports of Auckland cargo operations to Whangarei’s deepwater port of Northport. The working group's recommendation to close Auckland waterfront to all but cruise ...
    4 days ago
  • Week That Was: Supporting our schools
    We're setting our young people up for success, investing in education around the country.  ...
    4 days ago
  • Kiwis to have their say on End of Life Choice
    Jenny Marcroft MP, Spokesperson for Health New Zealand First backs the public to decide on the End of Life Choice Bill via a referendum at the 2020 General Election. The Bill, with New Zealand First’s referendum provision incorporated, passed its final reading in Parliament this evening. New Zealand First Spokesperson for ...
    1 week ago
  • Addressing miscarriages of justice
    Darroch Ball, Spokesperson for Justice New Zealand First is proud that a key Coalition Agreement commitment which will provide for a more transparent and effective criminal justice system has been realised. Legislation to establish the Criminal Cases Review Commission, an independent body focused on identifying and responding to possible miscarriages of ...
    1 week ago
  • Week That Was: Historic action on climate change
    "Today we have made a choice that will leave a legacy... I hope that means that future generations will see that we, in New Zealand, were on the right side of history." - Jacinda Ardern, Third Reading of the Zero Carbon Bill ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Tax-free deployments for Kiwi troops
    Darroch Ball, New Zealand First List MP A Member’s bill has been proposed that would provide income tax exemptions for all New Zealand Defence Force (NZDF) personnel while on operational deployment overseas. The Income Tax (Exemption for Salary or Wages of NZDF Members on Active Deployment) Amendment Bill proposed by New Zealand First ...
    2 weeks ago
  • A balanced Zero Carbon Bill passed
    Rt Hon Winston Peters, New Zealand First Leader New Zealand First is proud to have brought common sense to the Climate Change Response (Zero Carbon) Amendment Bill, which passed its final reading in Parliament today. Party Leader Rt Hon Winston Peters says months of hard work went into negotiating a balanced ...
    2 weeks ago
  • Paramedics’ status to be recognised
    Jenny Marcroft MP, Spokesperson for Health New Zealand First has listened to calls to recognise paramedics as registered health professionals under the Health Practitioners’ Competence Assurance Act (the Act). Today, the Coalition Government announced plans for paramedics to be registered as health practitioners under the Act, and the establishment of a ...
    2 weeks ago

  • PGF approves wind turbines funding for Stewart Island
    Stewart Island/Rakiura has been granted $3.16 million from the Provincial Growth Fund to help build two wind turbines, putting the island on a path to sustainable electricity generation, Environment Minister David Parker announced today. “Stewart Island is our third largest island, after the North and South Islands, and it is ...
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    4 hours ago
  • NZ economy in good shape amid global headwinds
    A major new report on the global economy shows New Zealand is in good shape amid increased global headwinds. The Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) has just released its latest Economic Outlook. It shows the OECD group of economies is forecast to grow between 1.6% and 1.7% across ...
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    8 hours ago
  • Milestone of 1800 new Police officers
    The Coalition commitment to add 1800 new Police officers to frontline policing has been achieved with the graduation of 59 constables from the Royal New Zealand Police College today. Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern and Deputy Prime Minister Winston Peters say today’s graduation means 1825 new Police have been deployed all ...
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    21 hours ago
  • PM appoints business leaders to APEC Business Advisory Council
    Ensuring APEC work gets input from diverse New Zealand business and trade interests is behind three new appointments to the APEC Business Advisory Council (ABAC), Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern says. Rachel Taulelei, Malcolm Johns and Toni Moyes have been appointed to represent New Zealand on the Asia Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) ...
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    23 hours ago
  • PM speech notes for Trans-Tasman Business Circle
    Nau mai, haere mai. Tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou, tēnā tatou katoa. Thank you for having me to speak today. To start, I’d like to acknowledge Sharron Lloyd, the General Manager of the Trans–Tasman Business Circle, the partners for this event Westpac’s  David McLean, and Derek McCormack from  AUT, and, of course ...
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    23 hours ago
  • Otago Regional Council given deadline for freshwater management plan
    A four-month investigation by former Environment Court judge Professor Peter Skelton found that Otago’s freshwater planning system is not fit for purpose to manage the region’s rivers, lakes and aquifers and that the Council has inadequate rules for the taking of water and the discharge of nutrients.   “Existing planning provisions ...
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    1 day ago
  • LGNZ Rural and Provincial Sector Speech
      Introduction Thank you for the invitation to speak to you today. This is the first opportunity I’ve had to speak to an LGNZ meeting since the local elections, and I’m delighted to see the fresh faces of newly elected mayors. To returning mayors here today, as well as chief ...
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    1 day ago
  • New Zealand to attend G20 Foreign Ministers’ Meeting in Japan
    Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters departs New Zealand today to attend the G20 Foreign Ministers’ Meeting in Nagoya at the invitation of this year’s G20 President, Japan. “This is the first time New Zealand will attend a G20 Foreign Ministers’ Meeting and we are deeply honoured that it is at ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Ambassador to the European Union announced
    Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters today announced the appointment of diplomat Carl Reaich as New Zealand’s next Ambassador to the European Union. “The Ambassador to the EU is one of the most important and senior roles in New Zealand’s foreign service, advocating for New Zealand’s interests with the EU institutions,” Mr ...
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    1 day ago
  • New inventions boost Predator Free 2050 effort
        Innovation and technology are behind five new tools to give nature a helping hand by helping eliminate predators, funded through the Provincial Growth Fund (PGF), Minister for Conservation Eugenie Sage and Parliamentary Under-Secretary for Regional Economic Development Fletcher Tabuteau announced today. “The new tools will be trialled in ...
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    1 day ago
  • APEC 2021 Bill passes first reading
    Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters has welcomed the first reading of the Asia Pacific Economic Cooperation 2021 (APEC 2021) Bill in Parliament today. The temporary bill supports New Zealand’s security preparations for hosting the Asia Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) Forum in 2021. “APEC is the leading economic and trade forum ...
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    2 days ago
  • Making progress for our kids
    The Government is making progress on improving the wellbeing of the one million New Zealanders under the age of 18,” Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern said on World Children’s Day. The Government has today recommitted to the most widely ratified human rights treaty in history – the United Nation’s Convention on ...
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    2 days ago
  • Māori women in business contribute to our economy, whānau and communities
    Minister for Women Julie Anne Genter has released a new report celebrating the contribution of Māori women in business across Aotearoa New Zealand. “Māori women are leaders in our communities, they employ many people and support our economy and our communities,” Julie Anne Genter said. The report, Ngā wāhine kaipakihi: ...
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    2 days ago
  • Two schools on the way for Omokoroa
    Four parcels of land have been bought in Omokoroa, in the Western Bay of Plenty District, for an education facility that will accommodate both a primary and secondary school on a campus-like facility, Education Minister Chris Hipkins said today. Two parcels were acquired from private land owners and two were ...
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    2 days ago
  • Families Package helps over 1 million New Zealanders in first year
    1 million New Zealanders warmed by the Winter Energy Payment 36,000 families bank the Best Start Payment in first year 6,000 more families received the Family Tax Credit, 220,600 in total   They receive an increase too – from an average of $117 to $157 a week for Inland Revenue clients, ...
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    2 days ago
  • Clamp down on wheel clamping passes third reading
    New rules to clamp down on overzealous wheel clamping and extortionate fees charged in order to release a vehicle have passed their final stage in Parliament today. The Land Transport (Wheel Clamping) Amendment Bill has now passed its third reading. “These changes mean $100 will be the maximum wheel clamping ...
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    3 days ago
  • Mental Health and Wellbeing Commission Bill passes first hurdle
    An independent Mental Health and Wellbeing Commission is a step closer after it unanimously passed its first vote in Parliament today.  The Mental Health and Wellbeing Commission Bill lays the groundwork for establishing the Commission as a fully independent crown entity – delivering on a key recommendation of He Ara ...
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    3 days ago
  • Boosting border security with electronic travel authority – now over 500,000 issued
    We’ve improved border security with the NZeTA, New Zealand Electronic Travel Authority, which helps us to screen travellers for border and immigration risks off-shore before they travel to New Zealand. It was launched in August and became mandatory on 1 October 2019. More than 500,000 NZeTAs have been issued since ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Plan of action to protect seabirds
    A proposed national plan of action to reduce the number of seabirds caught in fisheries is being circulated for public feedback. Fisheries Minister Stuart Nash and Conservation Minister Eugenie Sage say New Zealand is a global centre of seabird diversity with about 145 species in our waters. It has more ...
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    3 days ago
  • National interest test added to overseas investment rules
    The Government is delivering on its promise to protect New Zealanders’ interests by applying a new national interest test to the sales of our most sensitive and high risk assets to overseas buyers. Associate Finance Minister David Parker said under current Overseas Investment Act rules, assets such as ports and ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • New housing part of support for Kaumātua
    The Government is building special housing to accommodate one of Aotearoa’s greatest taonga- our kaumātua, says the Minister for Māori Development, Hon Nanaia Mahuta.  Speaking at a National Kaumātua Service Providers Conference in Rotorua today, the Minister reinforced the importance kaumātua play in maintaining and passing on mātauranga Māori, knowledge, ...
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    3 days ago
  • Forestry helps prisoners into jobs
    Eleven men from a pilot forestry training programme for prisoners in Northland now have full time jobs or job offers upon release, Corrections Minister Kelvin Davis and Forestry Minister Shane Jones announced today. The ‘release to work’ programme was a collaboration between Te Uru Rākau and the Department of Corrections, ...
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    3 days ago
  • Reform of public service a step closer
    Minister of State Services Chris Hipkins today introduced into Parliament a Bill that will make it easier for the public service to tackle the biggest challenges facing Governments. The Bill represents the most significant change in the public service in 30 years. The State Sector Act 1988 will be repealed ...
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    4 days ago
  • Donations scheme to relieve pressure on families
    The families of more than 416,000 students will be better off next year as their schools have signed up to the Government’s donations scheme, Education Minister Chris Hipkins said today. The scheme will see almost $62.5 million in additional Government funding go to schools nationwide next year. “I’m really pleased ...
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    4 days ago
  • Further support for Samoan measles outbreak
    Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters has announced further support as the Government of Samoa responds to a serious measles outbreak. “New Zealand will deploy a further 18 vaccination nurses, bringing the total to 30 working in Samoa over the next four weeks,” Mr Peters said. “A New Zealand Medical Assistance ...
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    4 days ago
  • Speech to the Child Poverty Action Group 2019 Summit
      Fa’atalofa atu, malo e lelei, Kia ora koutou katoa Thank you to the Child Poverty Action Group for asking me to be here today to provide an update on some of the things that have been happening across my the social development portfolio.  Can I firstly acknowledge the vast ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Speech to the New Zealand Thoroughbred Racing Annual Conference
    ***Please check against delivery*** Good morning everyone. It is a pleasure to be with you this morning to open this year’s New Zealand Thoroughbred Racing Conference and AGM. Firstly, thank you Dr Alan Jackson, NZTR Chair for your introduction. And let us acknowledge also: The NZTR Board; Dean McKenzie, Chair ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Fairer rules for tenants and landlords
    The Government has delivered on its promise to the over one million New Zealanders who now rent to make it fairer and more secure, Associate Minister of Housing (Public Housing) Kris Faafoi has announced today. Both renters and landlords will benefit from the suite of practical changes to the Residential ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Two decades of marine protection celebrated at Te Tapuwae o Rongokako in Tairawhiti
    A marine conservation milestone - the 20th anniversary of the establishment of Te Tapuwae o Rongokako Marine Reserve - is being celebrated today at a community event in Tairāwhiti/East Coast attended by the Minister of Conservation, Eugenie Sage. “The creation of this marine reserve in November 1999 was a game ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Food industry asked to step up fight against obesity
         The Government is asking the food industry to step up work to tackle obesity including reducing sugar, fat and salt in their products, better information for consumers, and tighter restrictions on advertising to children. Health Minister David Clark and Food Safety Minister Damien O’Connor have responded to a ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Modern emergency care for Queenstown area
    ew, modern emergency department and outpatient facilities at Queenstown’s Lakes District Hospital mean better emergency care for the growing tourist mecca’s visitors and locals, says Health Minister David Clark. Today Dr Clark officially opened the hospital’s redeveloped Emergency Department and Outpatient facilities. The new facilities include: •    An extended Emergency Department ...
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    1 week ago
  • Contraception important for New Zealanders
    Associate Health Minister Julie Anne Genter says today’s release of sexual and reproductive health data reinforces the significance of the Government’s commitment to providing free or very low-cost contraception. The Ministry of Health today published statistics from the Ministry of Health’s 2014/15 Health Survey. “It is important people can make ...
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    1 week ago
  • NZ medical staff and measles vaccines going to Samoa
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters has announced that at the request of the Samoan Government, New Zealand will be providing further support to Samoa as it faces a worsening measles outbreak. “In response to a request from the people of Samoa, New Zealand is providing 3000 measles, mumps and rubella (MMR) ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Disability Action Plan 2019 – 2023
    “The new Disability Action Plan 2019–2023 moves us towards the inclusive and accessible New Zealand that this government has committed to,” Minister for Disability Issues Carmel Sepuloni announced today.  “The Action Plan was designed by disabled people, their family and supporters, the disability sector and government agencies. It will ensure ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Joint Statement – Third Singapore-New Zealand Defence Ministers’ Meeting
    Third Singapore-New Zealand Defence Ministers’ Meeting 14 November 2019 Joint Statement 1. Defence Ministers Ron Mark and Dr Ng Eng Hen today conducted their third annual Singapore-New Zealand Defence Ministers’ Meeting in Singapore. 2. Building on the Enhanced Partnership signed between both countries in May this year, this annual meeting ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Sexual Violence Legislation Bill has its first reading
    A Bill to improve the court system’s response to sexual violence has passed its first reading in Parliament today. Justice Minister Andrew Little says the Sexual Violence Legislation Bill will reduce the trauma sexual violence complainants experience in court, while maintaining defendants’ fundamental rights and making sure the trial process ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Streamlined business invoicing a step closer
    Streamlined payment practices are a step closer for Kiwi businesses with the formal launch of New Zealand’s e-Invoicing framework. Small Business Minister Stuart Nash says the government has now established the structure to enable automated and direct data exchange between the accounting systems of buyers and sellers. “The move to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • More frontline biosecurity officers protecting NZ
    Another 51 quarantine officers and four new biosecurity detector dog teams will help protect New Zealand from invasive pests and diseases this summer, says Biosecurity Minister Damien O’Connor. “The Government is delivering on its commitment to strengthen New Zealand’s biosecurity system and support our valuable primary sector “New Zealand’s flora, fauna ...
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    1 week ago
  • NZ space economy worth $1.69 billion
    A new report has found New Zealand’s space sector contributed $1.69 billion to the economy in the last financial year and employs 12,000 people, Minister for Economic Development Phil Twyford announced today. The report by Deloitte was commissioned by the Ministry of Business, Innovation and Employment and shows New Zealand ...
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    1 week ago
  • New Chair for Royal Commission into Abuse
    Judge Coral Shaw has been appointed as the new Chair of the Royal Commission into Historical Abuse in State Care and in the Care of Faith-based Institutions, Internal Affairs Minister Tracey Martin announced today. "Judge Shaw, who is currently one of the inquiry commissioners, is extremely well qualified for the ...
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    1 week ago