Surgeons describe the task ahead of them as ‘challenging’. Mr Key, excited by the presence of the media, proudly displayed the problem veins, all the while wearing his patent ‘devil may care’ grin.
look we often try different things in cabinet – dress up as your hero day is no exception and yes sergeant schultz is right up there for me, although i am pissed off that bloody bill was hogan
Cool….this should take up some time till lunch…..then some touristy things then home….geez this job’s ace, even better than that dealer stuff with all those screens with numbers I never understood.
Ps. Special Cut Out ‘n’ Keep, All Purpose TimmyGram for those that miss our favourite auditor now that he’s been sent to the naughty step:
Interesting post, Mr ……. You’d better withdraw that picture/posting/comment before you get sued. Besides, it is clearly not the PM/National Party/Governments fault that what you say they did, they didn’t do and even though you say they didn’t do it, I say they doobie doobie do and Labour/The Greens/Winston did it, too.
As you know, I am but a humble bank auditor/independant thinking righty/not an insider. I would respond in kind to your hatefilled/shallow/name-ist comment by calling you an ignorant/pathetic/twisting socialist/envirofascist/Winstonite, but I’m too much of a gentleman. You Bastard.
In conclusion; black is white, the sun rises in the West and this government is in no way corrupt/incompetent/doomed to one term. That’s a fact or my name’s not Tim Ellis.
Terrified by their internal polling, and desperate to allay the growing perception of an effete, humourless socialist, the research team unveiled the “Keymanator”.
A listing of 34 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Sun, May 19, 2024 thru Sat, May 25, 2024. Story of the week This week's typiclal compendium of stories we'd rather were plot devices in science ficition novels but instead ...
This National government has been aggressively anti-environment, and is currently ramming through its corrupt Muldoonist "fast-track" legislation to give three ministers dictatorial powers over what gets built and where. But that's not the only thing they're doing. On Thursday they introduced a Resource Management (Freshwater and Other Matters) Amendment Bill, ...
Whenever politicians dole out taxpayer funding to groups or individuals, they must do so in a wholly transparent way with due process to ensure conflicts of interest donât occur and that the country receives value for money. Unfortunately, itâs not clear that this has occurred in the announcement this week ...
Last night began earlier than usual. In bed by 6:30pm, asleep an hour later. Sometimes I do sleep odd hours, writing late and/or getting up very early - complemented with the occasional siesta, but I’m usually up a bit later than that on a Saturday night. Last night I was ...
Early in the COVID-19 days, the Boris Johnson government pressed a Big Red Button marked: act immediately, never mind about the paperwork.Their problem was: not having enough PPE gear for all the hospital and emergency staff. Their solution was to expedite things and get them the gear ASAP.This, along with ...
Up until 1989, you could attend a New Zealand University, and never need to pay a cent for your education. That then changed, of course. The sadists of the Fourth Labour Government introduced substantial fees for study, never having had to pay a cent for their own education. The even ...
Ele Ludemann writes – Minister for Children Karen Chhour is putting children first: Hon KAREN CHHOUR: I move, That the Oranga Tamariki (Repeal of Section 7AA) Amendment Bill be now read a first time. I nominate the Social Services and Community Committee to consider the bill.Itâs a privilege ...
David Farrar writes – Newshub reports:  Applause and cheers erupted in the House on Wednesday afternoon as Childrenâs Minister Karen Chhour condemned Te PÄti MÄoriâs insults about her upbringing. Chhour, who grew up in state care, is repealing section 7AA of the Oranga Tamariki Act â sparking uproar from ...
I could corrupt youIt would be uglyThey could sedate youBut what good would drugs be?Good Morning all,Today there’s a guest newsletter from Gerard Otto (G). By which I mean I read his post this morning and he has kindly allowed me to share it with you.If you don’t already I ...
Is the solution to any of the serious, long term issues we all have to face as a nation, because many governments of all stripes we can probably all admit if we’re deeply truthful with ourselves haven’t done near enough work at the very times they should have, to basically ...
The 2018 Social Security Act suggests that Labour may have retreated to the minimalist (neo-liberal) welfare state which has developed out of the Richardson-Shipley âredesignâ. One wonders what Michael Joseph Savage, Peter Fraser and Walter Nash would have thought of the Social Security Act passed by the Ardern Labour Government ...
MPs are supposed to serve the public interest, not their own self-interest. And according to the New Zealand Parliamentâs website, democracy and integrity are tarnished whenever politicians seek to enrich themselves or the people they are connected with. For this reason, the Parliament has a âRegister of Pecuniary Interestsâ in ...
By now, most of you will have heard about the FLICC taxonomy of science denial techniques and how you can train your skills in detecting them with the Cranky Uncle game. If you like to quickly check how good you are at this already, answer the 12 quiz questions in the ...
Buzz from the Beehive The hacks of the Parliamentary Press Gallery have been able to chip into a rich vein of material on the governmentâs official website over the past 24 hours. Among the nuggets is the speech by Regional Development Minister Shane Jones and a press statement to announce ...
When Labour was in power, they wasted time, political capital, and scarce policy resources on trying to extend the parliamentary term to four years, in an effort to make themselves less accountable to us. It was unlikely to fly, the idea having previously lost tworeferendums by huge margins - ...
David Farrar writes – The Herald reports: When Whanau Ora chief executive John Tamihere was asked what his expectations for the Budget next Thursday were, he said: âAll hope is lost.â Last year WhÄnau Ora was allocated $163.1 million in the Budget to last for the next four years ...
Nick Hanne writes – There’s a common malady suffered by bureaucracies the world over. They wish to save us from ourselves. Sadly, NZ officials are no less prone to exhibiting symptoms of this occupational condition.Observe, for instance, the reaction from certain public figures to the news ...
Peter Dunne writes – As the city of Tauranga prepares to elect a new Mayor and Council after three and a half years being run by government-appointed Commissioners, the case for replacing the Wellington City Council with Commissioners strengthens. The Wellington City Council has been dysfunctional for years, ...
This will be s short post. It stems from observations I made elsewhere about what might be characterised as some macro and micro aspects of contemporary collective violence events. Here goes. The conflicts between Israel and Palestine and France and … Continue reading → ...
It may be a relic of a previous era of egalitarianism, but many of us like to think that, in general, most New Zealanders are as honest as the day is long. Weâre good like that, and smart as. If weâre not punching above our weight on the world stage, ...
Bryce Edwards writes – Why arenât politicians taking more action on the housing affordability crisis? The answer might lie in the latest âRegister of Pecuniary Interests.â This register contains details of the various financial interests of parliamentarians. It shows that politicians own real estate in significant numbers. The ...
I built a time machine to see you againTo hear your phone callYour voice down the hallThe way we were back thenWe were dancing in the rainOur feet on the pavementYou said I was your second headI knew exactly what you meantIn the country of the blind, or so they ...
Why arenât politicians taking more action on the housing affordability crisis? The answer might lie in the latest âRegister of Pecuniary Interests.â This register contains details of the various financial interests of parliamentarians. It shows that politicians own real estate in significant numbers. The register published on Tuesday contains a ...
Microsoft’s transparency about its failure to meet its own net-zero goals is creditable, but the response to that failure is worrying. It is offering up a set of false solutions, heavily buttressed by baseless optimism. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: Here’s the top six news items of note in ...
Another Friday, another RÄmere Roundup! Here are a few things that caught our eye this week. This Week in Greater Auckland On Monday, our new writer Connor Sharp roared into print with a future-focused take on the proposed Auckland Future Fund, and what it could invest in. On ...
Still Waiting: MÄori land remains in the hands of Non-MÄori. The broken promises of the Treaty remain broken. The mana of the tangata whenua languishes under racist neglect. The right to wear the huia feather remains as elusive as ever. Perhaps these three transformations are beyond the power of a ...
Posters opposing the proposed Fast-Track Approvals legislation were pasted around Wellington last week. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: One of the architects of the RMA and a former National Cabinet Minister, Simon Upton, has criticised the Government’s Fast-Track Approvals bill as potentially disastrous for the environment, arguing just 1% ...
There was less sharing of the joy this week than at the Chinese New Year celebrations in February. China’s ambassador to NZ (2nd from right above) has toldLuxon that relations between China and New Zealand are now at a ‘critical juncture’ Photo: Getty / Xinhua News AgencyTL;DR: The podcast ...
The importance of New Zealand’s relationship with China was surely demonstrated yesterday with the surprise arrival in the capital of top Chinese foreign policy official Liu Jianchao. The trip was apparently organized a week ago but kept secret. Liu is the Minister of the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) International Liaison ...
With a crushing 20-plus point lead in the opinion polls, all the signs are that Labour leader Keir Starmer will be the PM after the general election on 4 July, called by Conservative incumbent Rishi Sunak yesterday. The stars are aligned for Starmer. Rival progressives are in abeyance: the Liberal-Democrat ...
We returned last week from England to London. Two different worlds. A quarter of an hour before dropping off our car, we came to a complete stop on the M25. Just moments before, there had been six lanes of hurtling cars and lorries. Now, everything was at a standstill as ...
Buzz from the Beehive A triumvirate of ministers â holding the Agriculture, Environment and RMA Reform portfolios â has announced the introduction of legislation âto slash the tangle of red and green tape throttling development in key sectorsâ, such as farming, mining and other primary industries. The exact name of ...
The Social Services and Community Committee has called for submissions on the Oranga Tamariki (Repeal of Section 7AA) Amendment Bill. Submissions are due by Wednesday, 3 July 2024, and can be made at the link above. And if you're wondering what to say: section 7AA was enacted because Oranga Tamariki ...
Michael Reddell writes – The Reserve Bank doesnât do independent fiscal forecasts so there is no news in the fiscal numbers in todayâs Monetary Policy Statement themselves. The last official Treasury forecasts donât take account of whatever the government is planning in next weekâs Budget, and as the Bank notes ...
Rob MacCulloch writes – We know the old saying, “Never trust a politician”, and the Charter School debate is a good example of it. Charter Schools receive public funding, yet “are exempt from most statutory requirements of traditional public schools, including mandates around .. human capital management .. curriculum ...
How Do We Silence Them? The ruling obsession of the contemporary Left is that political action undertaken by individuals or groups further to the right than the liberal wings of mainstream conservative parties should not only be condemned, but suppressed.WEB OF CHAOS, a âdeep dive into the world of disinformationâ, ...
Muriel Newman writes –Â As the new Government puts the finishing touches to this monthâs Budget, they will undoubtedly have had their hands full dealing with the economic mess that Labour created. Not only was Labour a grossly incompetent manager of the economy, but they also set out ...
Today the British PM, Rishi Sunak, called a general election for the 4th of July. He spoke of the challenging times and of strong leadership and achievements. It was as if he was talking about someone else, a real leader, rather than he himself or the woeful list of Tory ...
This post marks the return of an old format: Photo of the Day. Recently I was in an apartment in one of those new buildings on Great North Road Grey Lynn at rush hour, perfect day, the view was stunning, so naturally I whipped out my phone: GNR 5pm Turns ...
The Government may struggle with the political optics of scrapping assistance for first home buyers while also cutting the tax burden on landlords, increasing concerns over the growing generational divide. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: The Government confirmed it will dump first home buyer grants in the Budget next ...
Yesterday, the Reserve Bank confirmed there will be no free card for the economy to get out of jail during the current term of the Government. Regardless of what the Budget next week says, we are in for three years of austerity. Over those three years, we will have to ...
It doesnât inspire confidence when politicians change their minds. But you must give credit when a bad idea is dropped. Last year, we reported on the determination of British PM Rishi Sunak to lead the world in regulating the dangers of Artificial Intelligence. Perhaps he changed his mind after meeting ...
This video includes conclusions of the creator climate scientist Dr. Adam Levy. It is presented to our readers as an informed perspective. Please see video description for references (if any). Is carbon dioxide removal - aka "negative emissions" - going to save us from climate change? Or is it just a ...
Headed for the legislative wastepaper basket…Â Â Buzz from the Beehive It looks like this government is just as ready as its predecessor to dip into the public funds it is managing to dispense millions of dollars to finance – and favour – the parties it fancies. Or ...
Rob MacCulloch writes – National and Labour and ACT have at various times waxed on about their “vision” of NZ as a high value-added world tech centerWhat subject is tech based upon? Mathematics. A Chicago mathematician just told me that whereas last decade ...
Eric Crampton writes – Danyl McLauchlan over at The Listener on the recent shift toward more contestability in public policy advice in education: Education Minister Erica Stanford, one of Nationalâs highest-ranked MPs, is trying to circumvent the establishment, taking advice from a smaller pool of experts â ...
Ele Ludemann writes – That KÄinga Ora is a mess is no surprise, but the size of the mess is. There have been many reports of unruly tenants given licence to terrorise neighbours, properties bought and left vacant, and the state agency paying above market rates in competition ...
Bryce Edwards writes –Â Itâs being explained as an âinadvertent errorâ. However, National MP David MacLeodâs excuse for failing to disclose $178,000 in donations for his election campaign last year is not necessarily enough to prevent some serious consequences. A Police investigation is now likely, and the result ...
The scathing âindependentâ review of KÄinga Ora barely hit the table before the coalition government had acted on it. The entire KÄinga Ora board will be replaced, and a new chair (Simon Moutter) has been announced. Hmm. No aspersions on Bill English, but the public would have had more confidence ...
I'll light the fireYou place the flowers in the vaseThat you bought todayA warm dry home, you’d think that would be bread and butter to politicians. Home ownership and making sure people aren’t left living on the street, that’s as Kiwi as Feijoa and Apple Crumble. Isn’t it?The coalition are ...
Politics is about compromise, right? And framing it so the voters see your compromise as the better one. John Key was a skilful exponent of this approach (as was Keith Holyoake in an earlier age), and Chris Luxon isnât too bad either. But in politics, the process whereby an old ...
On February 14, 2023 we announced our Rebuttal Update Project. This included an ask for feedback about the added "At a glance" section in the updated basic rebuttal versions. This weekly blog post series highlights this new section of one of the updated basic rebuttal versions and serves as a ...
Itâs being explained as an âinadvertent errorâ. However, National MP David MacLeodâs excuse for failing to disclose $178,000 in donations for his election campaign last year is not necessarily enough to prevent some serious consequences. A Police investigation is now likely, and the result of his non-disclosure could even see ...
The relentless drone coming out of the Prime Minister and his deputy for a million days now has been that the last government was just hosing money all over the show and now at last the grownups are in charge and shutting that drunken sailor stuff down. There is a word ...
Buzz from the Beehive Foreign Minister Winston Peters has confirmed a New Zealand Government plane will head to riot-torn New Caledonia in the next hour in the first in a series of proposed flights to begin bringing New Zealanders home. Todayâs flight will carry around 50 passengers with the most ...
Precious declaration saysYours is yours and mine you leave alone nowPrecious declaration saysI believe all hope is dead no longerTick tick tick Boom!Unexploded ordnance. A veritable minefield. A National caucus with a large number of unknowns, candidates who perhaps received little in the way of vetting as the party jumped ...
Rex Ahdar writes –Â The Rt Hon Winston Peters, Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Foreign Affairs, likes to trace his political lineage back to the pioneers of parliamentary Maoridom. Â I will refer to these as the âbig fourâ or better still, the Four Knights. Just as ...
Bryce Edwards writes –Â Willie Jackson will participate in the prestigious Oxford Union debate on Thursday, following in David Langeâs footsteps. Coincidentally, Jackson has also followed Langeâs footsteps by living in his old home in South Auckland. And like Lange, Jackson might be the sort of loud-mouth scrapper ...
That is the only way to describe an MP "forgetting" to declare $178,000 in donations. The amount of money involved - more than five times the candidate spending cap, and two and a half times the median income - is boggling. How do you just "forget" that amount of money? ...
In this week’s “A View from Afar” podcast Selwyn Manning and spoke about the upcoming US elections and what the possibility of another Trump presidency means for the US role in world affairs. We also spoke about the problems Joe … Continue reading → ...
Hi,Two years ago I briefly featured in Justin Pemberton’s Web of Chaos documentary, which touched on things like QAnon during the pandemic.I mostly prattled on about how intertwined conspiracy narratives are with Evangelical Christian thinking, something Webworm’s explored in the past.(The doc is available on TVNZ+, if you’re not in ...
The Government is leaving the entire construction sector and the community housing sector in limbo. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: The Government released the long-awaited Bill English-led review of Kāinga Ora yesterday, but delayed key decisions on its build plan and how to help community housing providers (CHPs) build ...
This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Daisy Simmons Farmers who can’t sleep, worrying they’ll lose everything amid increasing drought. Youth struggling with depression over a future that feels hopeless. Indigenous people grief-stricken over devastated ecosystems. For all these people and more, climate change is taking a clear toll ...
New Zealand’s relationship with China is becoming harder to define, and with that comes a worry that a deteriorating political relationship could spill over into the economic relationship. It is about more than whether New Zealand will join Pillar Two of Aukus, though the Chinese Ambassador, more or less, suggested ...
Been hoping we would see something like this from Sir Geoffrey Palmer. This is excellent.The present Bill goes further than the National Development Act 1979 in stripping away procedures designed to ensure that environmental issues are properly considered. The 1979 approach was not acceptable then and this present approach is ...
Heâs Got The Moxie: Only Willie Jackson possesses the credentials to meld together a new Labour message that is, at one and the same moment, staunchly working-class, union-friendly, and which speaks to the hundreds-of-thousands of urban MÄori untethered to the neo-tribal capitalist elites of the Iwi Leaders Forum.ITâS ONE OF THE ...
Tree-huggers may well accuse the Government of giving them the fingers, after Energy Minister Simeon Brown announced new measures to protect powerlines from trees, rather than measures to protect trees from powerlines. It can be no coincidence, surely, that this has been announced at the same as Fisheries Minister Shane Jones ...
Willie Jackson will participate in the prestigious Oxford Union debate on Thursday, following in David Lange’s footsteps. Coincidentally, Jackson has also followed Langeâs footsteps by living in his old home in South Auckland. And like Lange, Jackson might be the sort of loud-mouth scrapper who could take over the Labour ...
Today New Zealand First will introduce a Memberâs Bill that will protect New Zealanders' right of free speech. The âProtection of Freedom of Expression Billâ will ensure that no organisation or individual, when acting within the law, is unreasonably denied use of a public venue for an organised event or ...
The Green Party unequivocally condemns the governing partiesâ attempts to limit the publicâs say on the controversial MÄori wards legislation, after the select committee considering the legislation set a deadline for submissions of just five days. ...
Disabled children and families nationwide have recently found out theyâre no longer able to use disability support funding for programmes during school hours in another quiet update from the Government. ...
Following a horrific case of stalking that ended in tragedy, Labourâs police spokesperson Ginny Andersen has drafted a bill that would add stalking to the Crimes Act. ...
The Rt Hon Winston Peters, joined by Mike King, has announced $24 million over four years for the âI Am Hope Foundationâ, and will provide young people aged between 5 to 25 years with free mental health counselling services.  This funding will help I Am Hopeâs âGumboot Fridayâ initiative give ...
Te PÄti MÄori have launched a petition to stop the repeal of Section 7AA from the Oranga Tamariki Act. This announcement comes prior to the first reading of the Section 7AA repeal bill in Parliament today. âSection 7AA forces the Government to adhere to Te Tiriti o Waitangi with respect ...
The Government has yet again failed to do the one thing that needs to happen to ensure houses can be built â commit to ongoing funding, Labour housing spokesperson Kieran McAnulty said. ...
Treasury officials have outlined many ways in which the Fast Track Approvals Bill is deeply flawed, Labour environment spokesperson Rachel Brooking says. ...
Green Party co-leaders Marama Davidson and ChlÜe Swarbrick used this year's State of the Planet to call on the Government to prioritise people and planet as the delivery of the Budget approaches. A full transcript of their speeches can be found below. ...
Green Party co-leaders Marama Davidson and ChlĂśe Swarbrick have used their State of the Planet speeches to challenge the Government to prioritise people and planet over profit as the delivery of the Budget approaches. ...
More than 4,500 jobs are set to go as the National Government continues its deep cuts to services to pay for irresponsible and ill-timed tax cuts. Â ...
The Governmentâs introduction of legislation that would enable landlords to end tenancies with no reason marks a dark day for the 1.4 million people who rent their home in Aotearoa. ...
The Minister for Mental Health has found the Suicide Prevention Office and mental health support for 111 calls slipping through his fingers, says Labour spokesperson for Mental Health Ingrid Leary. ...
Todayâs justification from the Minister for Children for scrapping protections for our tamariki was either a case of ignorance or deliberate deception. ...
The Green Party says the Governmentâs misguided policy on gangs will fail, following the announcement of the establishment of a national gang unit and district gang disruption units to target gang activities. ...
âWith Police pay negotiations still unresolved after six months in Government, Mark Mitchell has today rolled the Commissioner out for a rebrand of their approach to gang crime,â Labour police spokesperson Ginny Andersen said.  ...
The Government bringing back 50 charter schools will not increase achievement and is a distraction from the core mission of the education system, Labour education spokesperson Jan Tinetti said. ...
Te PÄti MÄori is showing extreme concern over the Environment Select Committees adoption of a lucky dip draw to determine hearings for the Fast Track Approvals bill. Of the 27,000 submissions, 2,900 requested to present. All organisations will be heard; however, the remaining 2,350 submitters will be subject to a ...
Today New Zealand First will introduce a Memberâs Bill that will protect womenâs spaces. The âFair Access to Bathrooms Billâ will require, primarily in the interest and safety of women and girls, that all new non-domestic publicly accessible buildings provide separate, clearly demarcated, unisex and single sex bathrooms. This Bill ...
The Green Party is welcoming Climate Change Minister Simon Wattsâ continuation of Hon. James Shawâs cross-party work on climate adaptation, now in the form of a Finance and Expenditure Committee Inquiry. ...
The National Government plans to cut 390 jobs at ACC, including roles in the areas of prevention of sexual violence, road safety and workplace safety. ...
The Government has been caught in opposition to evidence once again as it looks to usher in tried, tested and failed work seminar obligations for job-seeking beneficiaries. ...
This morningâs pre-Budget speech from the Minister of Finance offered no âmeaningfulâ news on the Governmentâs trickle-down economics based plans. ...
The Green Party is welcoming the announcement by the Minister Responsible for RMA Reform Chris Bishop to approve most of the Wellington City Councilâs District Plan recommendations. ...
David Seymour has failed to get the sweeping cuts he wanted to the free and healthy school lunch programme, Labour education spokesperson Jan Tinetti said. ...
Hon Willie Jackson has been invited by the Oxford Union to debate the motion âThis House Believes British Museums are not Very Britishâ on May 23rd. ...
Over the next four years, Budget 24 will support the training and recruitment of 1,500 teachers into the workforce, Education Minister Erica Stanford announced today. âTo raise achievement and develop a world leading education system weâre investing nearly $53 million over four years to attract, train and retain our valued ...
1.  New Zealand Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Foreign Affairs Rt Hon Winston Peters; Minister of Health and Minister for Pacific Peoples Hon Dr Shane Reti; and Minister for Climate Change Hon Simon Watts hosted Cook Islands Minister of Foreign Affairs and Immigration Hon Tingika Elikana and Minister of Health Hon Vainetutai Rose Toki-Brown on 24 May ...
The Government has approved two-year extensions for four New Zealand Defence Force deployments to the Middle East and Africa, Defence Minister Judith Collins and Foreign Minister Winston Peters announced today. âThese deployments are long-standing New Zealand commitments, which reflect our ongoing interest in promoting peace and stability, and making active ...
The Climate Change Commission Chair, Dr Rod Carr, has confirmed his plans to retire at the end of his term later this year, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. âPrior to the election, Dr Carr advised me he would be retiring when his term concluded. Dr Rod Carr has led ...
Nine highly respected experts have been appointed to the inaugural board of the new Integrity Sport and Recreation Commission, Sport & Recreation Minister Chris Bishop says. âThe Integrity Sport and Recreation Commission is a new independent Crown entity which was established under the Integrity Sport and Recreation Act last year, ...
Foreign Minister Winston Peters confirmed today that Vote Foreign Affairs in Budget 2024 will balance two crucial priorities of the Coalition Government.  While Budget 2024 reflects the constrained fiscal environment, the Government also recognises the critical role MFAT plays in keeping New Zealanders safe and prosperous.  âConsistent with ...
New social housing funding in Budget 2024 will ensure the Government can continue supporting more families into warm, dry homes from July 2025, Housing Ministers Chris Bishop and Tama Potaka say. âEarlier this week I was proud to announce that Budget 2024 allocates $140 million to fund 1,500 new social ...
Introduction Today, we are sharing a red-letter occasion. A Blackball event on hallowed ground. Today we underscore the importance of our mineral estate. A reminder that our natural resource sector has much to offer. Such a contribution will not come to pass without investment. However, more than money is needed. ...
Increasing national and regional prosperity, providing the minerals needed for new technology and the clean energy transition, and doubling the value of minerals exports are the bold aims of the Governmentâs vision for the minerals sector. Resources Minister Shane Jones today launched a draft strategy for the minerals sector in ...
The coalition Governmentâs legislation to restore the rights of communities to determine whether to introduce MÄori wards has passed its first reading in Parliament, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown says. âDivisive changes introduced by the previous government denied local communities the ability to determine whether to establish MÄori wards.â The ...
The coalition Government has today introduced legislation to slash the tangle of red and green tape throttling some of New Zealandâs key sectors, including farming, mining and other primary industries. RMA Reform Minister Chris Bishop says the Government is committed to unlocking development and investment while ensuring the environment is ...
The decision by Environmental Protection Authority (EPA) to approve the continued use of hydrogen cyanamide, known as Hi-Cane, has been welcomed by Environment Minister Penny Simmonds and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay. âThe EPA decision introduces appropriate environmental safeguards which will allow kiwifruit and other growers to use Hi-Cane responsibly,â Ms ...
Kia ora, NgÄ mihi nui ki a koutou kÄtoa TÄmaki Herenga Waka, TÄmaki Herenga tangata NgÄ mihi ki ngÄ mana whenua o tÄnei rohe NgÄti WhÄtua Ĺ ĹrÄkei me nga iwi kÄtoa kua tae mai. Mauriora. Greetings everyone. Thank you to the EMA for hosting this event. Let me acknowledge ...
The coalition Government is investing in social housing for New Zealanders who are most in need of a warm dry home, Housing Minister Chris Bishop says. Budget 2024 will allocate $140 million in new funding for 1,500 new social housing places to be provided by Community Housing Providers (CHPs), not ...
Thousands more young New Zealanders will have better access to mental health services as the Government delivers on its commitment to fund the Gumboot Friday initiative, says Deputy Prime Minister Winston Peters and Mental Health Minister Matt Doocey. âBudget 2024 will provide $24 million over four years to contract the ...
The Coalition Governmentâs Residential Tenancies Amendment Bill, which will improve tenancy laws and help increase the supply of rental properties, has passed its first reading in Parliament says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. âThe Bill proposes much-needed changes to the Residential Tenancies Act 1986 that will remove barriers to increasing private ...
Standing here in Cassino War Cemetery, among the graves looking up at the beautiful Abbey of Montecassino, it is hard to imagine the utter devastation left behind by the battles which ended here in May 1944. Hundreds of thousands of shells and bombs of every description left nothing but piled ...
I present a legislative statement on the Oranga Tamariki (Repeal of Section 7AA) Amendment Bill Mr. Speaker, I move that the Oranga Tamariki (Repeal of Section 7AA) Amendment Bill be now read a first time. I nominate the Social Services and Community Committee to consider the Bill. Thank you, Mr. ...
The Bill to repeal Section 7AA of the Oranga Tamariki Act has had its first reading in Parliament today. The Bill reaffirms the Coalition Governmentâs commitment to the care and safety of children in care, says Minister for Children Karen Chhour. âWhen I became the Minister for Children, I made ...
Kia ora koutou, good morning, and zao shang hao. Thank you Fran for the opportunity to speak at the 2024 China Business Summit â itâs great to be here today. Iâd also like to acknowledge: Simon Bridges - CEO of the Auckland Chamber of Commerce. His Excellency Ambassador - Wang ...
Foreign Minister Winston Peters has confirmed a New Zealand Government plane will head to New Caledonia in the next hour in the first in a series of proposed flights to begin bringing New Zealanders home.  âNew Zealanders in New Caledonia have faced a challenging few days - and bringing ...
Foreign Minister Winston Peters has confirmed a New Zealand Government plane will head to New Caledonia in the next hour in the first in a series of proposed flights to begin bringing New Zealanders home. âNew Zealanders in New Caledonia have faced a challenging few days - and bringing them ...
The Coalition Government will introduce legislation this year that will enable roadside drug testing as part of our commitment to improve road safety and restore law and order, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. âAlcohol and drugs are the number one contributing factor in fatal road crashes in New Zealand. In ...
The Government has announced a series of immediate actions in response to the independent review of KÄinga Ora â Homes and Communities, Housing Minister Chris Bishop says. âKÄinga Ora is a large and important Crown entity, with assets of $45 billion and over $2.5 billion of expenditure each year. It ...
Associate Health Minister David Seymour is pleased that Pseudoephedrine can now be purchased by the general public to protect them from winter illness, after the coalition government worked swiftly to change the law and oversaw a fast approval process by Medsafe. âPharmacies are now putting the medicines back on their ...
TÄnÄ koutou katoa.âŻDa jia hao.  Good morning everyone.  Prime Minister Luxon, your excellency, a great friend of New Zealand and my friend Ambassador Wang, Mayor of what he tells me is the best city in New Zealand, Wayne Brown, the highly respected Fran OâSullivan, Champion of the Auckland business ...
Energy Minister Simeon Brown has announced that the Government will make it easier for lines firms to take action to remove vegetation from obstructing local powerlines. The change will ensure greater security of electricity supply in local communities, particularly during severe weather events. âTrees or parts of trees falling on ...
Wairarapa Moana ki Pouakani were the top winners at this yearâs Ahuwhenua Trophy awards recognising the best in MÄori dairy farming. MÄori Development Minister Tama Potaka announced the winners and congratulated runners-up, WhakatĹhea MÄori Trust Board, at an awards celebration also attended by Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Finance Minister ...
"On the 27th of March, I sought assurances from the Chief Executive, Department of Internal Affairs, that the Departmentâs correct processes and policies had been followed in regards to a passport application which received media attention,â says Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden. âI raised my concerns after being ...
Attorney-General Judith Collins has announced the appointment of three new District Court Judges, to replace Judges who have recently retired. Peter James Davey of Auckland has been appointed a District Court Judge with a jury jurisdiction to be based at Whangarei. Mr Davey initially started work as a law clerk/solicitor with ...
Associate Education Minister David Seymour is calling on the Post Primary Teachersâ Association (PPTA) to put ideology to the side and focus on studentsâ learning, in reaction to the union holding paid teacher meetings across New Zealand about charter schools.⯠âŻÂ âThe PPTA is disrupting schools up and down the ...
Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly today announced the appointment of Craig Stobo as the new chair of the Financial Markets Authority (FMA). Mr Stobo takes over from Mark Todd, whose term expired at the end of April. Mr Stoboâs appointment is for a five-year term. âThe FMA plays ...
Surf Life Saving New Zealand and Coastguard New Zealand will continue to be able to keep people safe in, on, and around the water following a funding boost of $63.644 million over four years, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Associate Transport Minister Matt Doocey say. âHeading to the beach for ...
New Zealand and Tuvalu have reaffirmed their close relationship, Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters says. âNew Zealand is committed to working with Tuvalu on a shared vision of resilience, prosperity and security, in close concert with Australia,â says Mr Peters, who last visited Tuvalu in 2019. âIt is my pleasure ...
New Zealand is gravely concerned about the situation in New Caledonia, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. âThe escalating situation and violent protests in NoumĂŠa are of serious concern across the Pacific Islands region,â Mr Peters says. âThe immediate priority must be for all sides to take steps to de-escalate the ...
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon met today with Samoaâs O le Ao o le Malo, Afioga Tuimalealiifano Vaaletoa Sualauvi II, who is making a State Visit to New Zealand. âHis Highness and I reflected on our two countriesâ extensive community links, with SamoanâNew Zealanders contributing to all areas of our national ...
Transport Minister Simeon Brown has announced that he has approved Waiheke Island ferry operator Island Direct to be eligible for SuperGold Card funding, paving the way for a commercial agreement to bring the operator into the scheme. âIsland Direct started operating in November 2023, offering an additional option for people ...
Foreign Minister Winston Peters today announced further sanctions on 28 individuals and 14 entities providing military and strategic support for Russiaâs invasion of Ukraine. âRussia is directly supported by its military-industrial complex in its illegal aggression against Ukraine, attacking its sovereignty and territorial integrity. New Zealand condemns all entities and ...
A year on from the tragedy at Loafers Lodge, the Government is working hard to improve building fire safety, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. âI want to share my sincere condolences with the families and friends of the victims on the anniversary of the tragic fire at Loafers ...
Ka nui te mihi kia koutou. Kia ora and good afternoon, everyone. Thank you so much for having me here in the lead up to my Governmentâs first Budget. Before I get started can I acknowledge: Simon Bridges â Auckland Business Chamber CEO. Steve Jurkovich â Kiwibank CEO. Kids born ...
Asia Pacific Report Pro-Palestinian protesters today condemned Google for sacking protesting staff and demanded that the New Zealand government immediately âcut ties with Israeli genocideâ. Wearing Google logo masks and holding placards saying âGoogle complicit in genocideâ and âGoogle drop Project Nimbusâ, the protesters were targeting the global tech company ...
Fresh off the back of episode one of Married at First Sight NZâs new season, Alex Casey and Tara Ward fire up the chat to dissect what the hell we all just watched. Alex Casey: Tara, are you still screaming? Iâm screaming. Tara Ward: I started screaming the moment I ...
Fresh off the back of episode one of Married at First Sight NZâs new season, Alex Casey and Tara Ward fire up the chat to dissect what the hell we all just watched. Alex Casey: Tara, are you still screaming? Iâm screaming. Tara Ward: I started screaming the moment I ...
Asia Pacific Report A West Papuan independence group has condemned French âmodern-day colonialism in actionâ in Kanaky New Caledonia and urged indigenous leaders to âfight onâ. In a statement to the Kanak pro-independence leadership, exiled United Liberation Movement for West Papua (ULMWP) president Benny Wenda said the proposed electoral changes ...
âThe situation in Gaza is desperate,â Will Alexander said. âItâs obvious to everyone that if Christopher Luxon truly cared, our government could do a lot more.â ...
ANALYSIS:By Nicole George, The University of Queensland New Caledoniaâs capital city, NoumĂŠa, has endured widespread violent rioting over the past three days. This crisis intensified rapidly, taking local authorities by surprise. Peaceful protests had been occurring across the country in the preceding weeks as the French National Assembly in ...
EDITORIAL:By Fred Wesley, editor-in-chief of The Fiji Times So 40 Fiji members of Parliament voted in favour of the Special Committee on Emoluments Report on the review of MPsâ salaries, allowances and benefits in Parliament on Friday. Now thatâs not going down well with the masses, with many venting ...
First Hovel Grant Bishop Chris ventured out of the High Keep For his annual tour of the slums of the Holey Land. His litter bearers held his palanquin high Above the muck strewn and dilapidated alleys Of the Capital. The menials and peons swarmed around And pleaded for Alms from ...
Opinion: Following Franceâs President Emmanuel Macronâs visit to New Caledonia on Thursday, attention has turned to the countryâs political future beyond the ongoing crisis. The uprising, which began on May 14, has demonstrated the capacity and determination of those involved to shut down the country and to inflict extensive economic ...
Asia Pacific ReportBy a Kanak from Aotearoa New Zealand in Kanaky Iâve been trying to feel cool and nice on this beautiful sunny day in Kanaky. But it has already been spoiled by President Emmanuel Macronâs flashy day-long visit on Thursday. Currently special French military forces are trying to ...
RNZ Pacific The survivors of a massive landslide in a remote village in Papua New Guineaâs highlands are still waiting for official help, more than 24 hours after the disaster. Hundreds are feared dead in Yambali village in Enga province after the landslide bulldozed homes and buried families alive early ...
By Miriam Zarriga in Port Moresby The United States has said it is âready to lend a helping handâ to the people of Mulitaka, Enga province, after a devasting landslide swallowed an entire village in Papua New Guineaâs highlands yesterday. US President Joe Biden and his wife said in a ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra Housing remains one of Australiaâs most pressing issues in both state and federal politics. The RBA keeping rates up and high mortgage repayments have left many Australians struggling. For those Australians who donât own a ...
This plan lacks any thought on how to drive New Zealand forward. Giving away rare minerals owned by every New Zealander for a measly return of 2.1% to the crown last year is simply ludicrous. ...
A West Coast conservation leader is lodging a complaint with Police after an officer barred her from a public meeting in Blackball, called by Resources Minister Shane Jones. The NZ First politician was in the historic coal-mining town on Thursday to launch the Governmentâs new draft minerals strategy, promising to ...
Editor Madeleine Chapman meets an old rival and wonders what couldâve been. MĹrena and welcome to The Weekend, where dreams and regrets have time and space to flower. Whatâs the thing in your life that you wish you had given more energy to? It could be a relationship, an exam, ...
This year, Tori Peeters will compete at the Paris Olympics in the javelin. Ten years ago, Madeleine Chapman thought she might be in the same position. She talks to Peeters about what it takes to go all the way and mulls her own life decisions in the process.No New ...
The star of High Country talks Tinkerbell, her love for Hawkeye Pierce and why a 98-year-old environmentalist is the most stylish man on television. Sara Wiseman has been a fixture on New Zealand television screens for nearly three decades. First appearing in Hercules and Xena Warrior Princess during the mid ...
Alex Casey takes a trip to Lincoln to visit the only couple from the first season of Married at First Sight NZ thatâs still together. To cross the threshold into Brett and Angelâs marital abode is to be greeted with a welcome that sums up the MAFSNZ season one golden ...
In a new weekly interview series, we ask a different local artist to curate their dream weekend soundtrack. First up: Troy Kingi. Troy Kingi is a man on a well-documented mission to make 10 albums, in 10 genres, over 10 years. But finding himself creatively blocked while making his eighth ...
Reflections on a childhood split across Hong Kong and Auckland. The Sunday Essay is made possible thanks to the support of Creative New Zealand.I arrive in Hong Kong with my mother in the middle of summer. tâs not a good time to travel here, she tells me. Itâs June. Weâre ...
Pacific Media Watch Pro-Palestinian protesters dressed in blue âpressâ vests tonight staged a vigil calling on New Zealand journalists to show solidarity with the media of Gaza who have suffered the highest death toll in any war. They staged the vigil at the Viaduct venue of NZâs annual Voyager Media ...
Opinion: Outside my house, the autumn breeze blows crisp leaves off trees and leaks through the gap in my ranchslider while I slump on my couch listening to our CEO announcing our restructure. With many ums and ahs, he reads his script, talking of âprioritisation,â âworking differently,â and âreconceiving the ...
Just days after Taiwan’s new president called on China to stop making threats, Beijing has launched “punishment” military drills around the island. Everyone was watching to see what China’s reaction to the swearing in of President William Lai Ching-te would be. On Thursday night we found out. China had already ...
For the past six weeks Annie has been sleeping with a teacher named Patrick Drury. Twice he has tried to call it an affair. Twice she has considered correcting him. But she likes how he looks when he says it. She likes that heâs older than her. That heâs recently ...
MONDAY Fast-Track Jones stood in the shade beneath an awning of a train station and waited for the 3:10 to Blackball. He narrowed his eyes and studied the view. A water tower. A windmill. A cattle fence. All else was empty land. Locomotive smoke rose over the horizon. The 3:10 ...
A groundbreaking investigative podcast into the death of Gore three-year-old Lachie Jones has won Melanie Reid and Bonnie Sumner two notable awards at the Voyager Media Awards. Their in-depth reporting and nine-part first season of The Boy in the Water, which led to the case being reopened twice and preceded ...
By Eleisha Foon, RNZ Pacific senior journalist Scores of people have died in a huge landslide which has struck a remote village in the Papua New Guinean highlands. The landslide reportedly hit Yambali village in Enga Province, about 600 km north-west of Port Moresby. The landslip has buried homes and ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Lara Herrero, Research Leader in Virology and Infectious Disease, Griffith University Red-Diamond/Shutterstock Weâve now been living with COVID for well over four years. Although thereâs still much to learn about SARS-CoV-2 (the virus that causes COVID) at least one thing seems ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Clive Schofield, Professor, Australian National Centre for Ocean Resources and Security (ANCORS), University of Wollongong The International Tribunal for the Law of the Sea has found countries are obliged to protect the oceans from climate change impacts under the law of the ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Rebecca McGirr, Postdoctoral research fellow, Australian National University Bernhard Staehli/Shutterstock Imagine youâre standing near the edge of the Antarctic Ice Sheet, gazing out over the ocean, when the ice near you starts to melt very rapidly. A surge of meltwater flows ...
The Finance Minister prepares to present one of the most difficult budgets, National MP David MacLeod gets himself into trouble and the First Home Buyers Grant is scrapped. ...
The Iranian Solidarity Group NZ met with Minister For Foreign Affairs Rt. Hon. Winston Peters, urging the NZ government to designate the Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (the IRGC) as a terrorist organisation. The group continues to advocate for justice ...
On 24th May, 6pm, Palestinian journalists covering Gaza will be honoured in a silent and visually impactful vigil outside Shed 10, 89 Quay Street, Auckland, where the Voyager Media Awards are being held. ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tim Harcourt, Industry Professor and Chief Economist, University of Technology Sydney This should be a golden age for Australian soccer. After all, the big picture is good: the Matildas are waltzing, the Socceroos are well supported and Australia was just awarded hosting ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Ben Wellings, Associate Professor in Politics and International Relations, Monash University Assuming a Labour win in the UK general election â always a risky assumption given Labourâs proclivity for snatching defeat from the jaws of victory â the âGlobal Britainâ bombast emanating ...
The community group People Against Prisons Aotearoa is holding a protest against mass incarceration tomorrow against the Governmentâs proposed expansion of Waikeria prison. ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By T.J. Thomson, Senior Lecturer in Visual Communication & Digital Media, RMIT University Shutterstock OpenAI, the makers of ChatGPT, and News Corp, the international media conglomerate, have signed a deal that will let OpenAI use and learn from News Corpâs content. In ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Jaimon Kelly, Senior Research Fellow in Telehealth delivered health services, The University of Queensland Shutterstock/Nils Versemann For many Australians the emergency department (ED) is the physical and emblematic front door to accessing urgent health-care services. But health-care services are evolving rapidly ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Rebecca Trelease, Senior Lecturer in Communication Studies, Auckland University of Technology Getty Images Following the hugely successful recent season of Married At First Sight (MAFS) Australia, fans of the format â and the reality romance genre in general â will be ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Dominic Redfern, Associate Professor, School of Art, RMIT University We Are All Unique by Universal Everything commissioned by Hyundai Motorstudio Senayan Park in Beings at ACMI.Image by Michelle Tran At this weekâs launch of Beings by Universal Everything, ACMI board member ...
As Married at First Sight New Zealand returns to our screens this Sunday, Tara Ward speaks to the showâs new relationship experts about what lies ahead. This is an excerpt from our weekly pop culture newsletter Rec Room. Sign up here. John Aiken is teasing Jo Robertson about her cup of ...
A new poem by Wellington writer Erin Donohue. The bodyâs score Here is what happens if you starve yourself for years. Your body will forget herself. She will have to learn new how a heart beats and she will not get it right. She will need MRIs and a quiet ...
The only published and available best-selling indie book chart in New Zealand is the top 10 sales list recorded every week at Unity Booksâ stores in High St, Auckland, and Willis St, Wellington.AUCKLAND1Â Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi (Picador, $25)A charming, smash-hit book about ...
COMMENTARY:By Eugene Doyle âOnly the struggle counts . . . death is nothing.â Ăloi Machoro â âthe Che Guevara of the Pacificâ â said this shortly before he was gunned down by a French sniper on 12 January 1985. Machoro, one of the leaders of the newly-formed FLNKS (Kanak ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Alexandra Wake, Associate Professor, Journalism, RMIT University Photo by Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels The news media play a vital role in shaping the public conversation and covering complex issues such as war, the economy, climate change and technology. Yet our new research ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Aviroop Gupta, PhD Candidate, Curtin University Narendra Modiâs right-wing Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) has resorted to religious polarisation as it tries to rally its Hindu nationalist base in Indiaâs ongoing general election, which ends on June 1. Just days after voting started ...
Lana Waltersâ new show is playing in Auckland for the NZ International Comedy Festival. Madeleine Holden (a parent) and Liv Sisson (not) went along to review. I hadnât heard of comedian Lana Walters until a colleague posted the following message in one of The Spinoffâs Slack channels: âHas anyone been ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Paola A. Magni, Associate Professor of Forensic Science, Murdoch University Microgen / Shutterstock When you think of a criminal investigation, you might picture detectives meticulously collecting and analysing evidence found at the scene: weapons, biological fluids, footprints and fingerprints. However, this ...
Recent price falls in the New Zealand market for carbon credits leaves the Government facing the prospect of a significant loss of revenue from carbon auctions this year. The March financial statements from Treasury highlight lower-than-expected revenue ...
ANALYSIS:By Patrick Decloitre, RNZ Pacific correspondent French Pacific desk French President Emmanuel Macron has ended a meeting-packed whirlwind day in New Caledonia with back-to-back sessions including opposing leaders in the French Pacific territory. Macron left New Caledonia this morning, leaving some members of his entourage to deal with details ...
"The government's 'Draft Mineral Strategy' released this week by Minister for Resources Shane Jones is a disaster in the making for the environment, the climate and people as more and more rural communities will have to battle these companies ...
Behind the pretty flower beds at Auckland Botanic Gardens, conservation mahi is under way for the regionâs 357 threatened plants. This is an excerpt from our weekly environmental newsletter Future Proof. Sign up here. At Auckland Botanic Gardens, conservation specialist Ella Rawcliffe has been trying to plant a seed thatâs smaller ...
One financial hopeful looks to MPs for inspiration on how to be savvy with money.As a person whose search history includes âeasy ways to make moneyâ and âwhat should I do with $1,000 savingsâ, my interest was piqued when parliament released the pecuniary interests register this week. Since 2005, ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Barbara Mintzes, Professor, School of Pharmacy and Charles Perkins Centre, University of Sydney Monster Ztudio/Shutterstock Drug companies are paying Australian doctors millions of dollars a year to fly to overseas conferences and meetings, give talks to other doctors, and to serve ...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Trivess Moore, Associate Professor, School of Property, Construction and Project Management, RMIT University The Victorian government is planning Australiaâs largest urban renewal project. The plan is to knock down and rebuild 44 large public housing towers in Melbourne. The government says these ...
This will protect me against climate change!
Heh, that’s what I thought too (link for those who don’t get the reference)
Helen wont mind me borrowing her gimp suit for the night…and I’ll use her haircutting device as well heh heh…
excuse me while I Implode.
Look, Jerry lent me one of his old ones! It’s comfortable, really…
I so need a poster of this.
NZ will soon be, like me, in fine shape. Before Xmas…or after some time in the future
yeah i saw this in the paper today and thought what was his Press Sec thinking!?
Presumably he thought it would look like Key had a sense of humour.
but looks like he has a very serious medical condition
or displaying shades of idiocy
I intercepted tighty righty and roger nome on their way to a crap Dunedin pub and stuffed them up my jumper. Still giving the bash after 24 hours…
Been on another albar bender billy? Fancy you making a second home at a repressed Scottish bar! Who would have thought!
I decided the best solution to the Bill English situation was to eat him……….mmmmmmmm Diptony
Best comment!
heheh “mmmm diptony” could really catch on, meaning a sweet sweet feed to which you are not entitled
yeah ‘Diptony’ is an excellent adjective đ
I’ve been toning up for a bit of the action next time I’m on Letterman.
What a boob.
Who would have thought a PM could look so bloody stupid!!!
All Labour need to do next election is put the pic up on the billboards….
John Key bravely introduces his conjoined twin “Timmy’ to the New Zealand public.
Greenfly, do try to keep up. “Timmy” has been given a week’s ban over here.
i go freaky when i don’t shower – shall i put my clothes back on doc?
Surgeons describe the task ahead of them as ‘challenging’. Mr Key, excited by the presence of the media, proudly displayed the problem veins, all the while wearing his patent ‘devil may care’ grin.
And for my next photo op I’ll walk the plank.
exactly
Not realising how ridiculous he looked Johnny didn’t realise that everyone was laughing AT him. He just grinned vacuously.
“All that money Bill took from the tax payer? Nah, haven’t seen it ay…”
look we often try different things in cabinet – dress up as your hero day is no exception and yes sergeant schultz is right up there for me, although i am pissed off that bloody bill was hogan
Once was a Goober named Key
Supposedly in charge of an economy
Just for a hoot
He put on a suit
And the media danced with glee
See this is what happens when you swallow ‘dead rats’ to get elected.
Hah! Brilliant.
parekura wishes he looks this good
this is what Carter wears on his overseas junkets to steal toiletries and bath robes.
i wonder what the world would be like if there were ever funny righties?
“I’ll sue the bloody Crosby surgeon… he said he’d make me a right tit… and look what he did!!
“No need to worry about my speeding motorcade now – with my new high-tech airbag, I’ll be perfectly safe.”
Cool….this should take up some time till lunch…..then some touristy things then home….geez this job’s ace, even better than that dealer stuff with all those screens with numbers I never understood.
“Eat your heart out, Paula, mine are bigger than yours!”
“Does my bumbling look big in this?”
Ps. Special Cut Out ‘n’ Keep, All Purpose TimmyGram for those that miss our favourite auditor now that he’s been sent to the naughty step:
Interesting post, Mr ……. You’d better withdraw that picture/posting/comment before you get sued. Besides, it is clearly not the PM/National Party/Governments fault that what you say they did, they didn’t do and even though you say they didn’t do it, I say they doobie doobie do and Labour/The Greens/Winston did it, too.
As you know, I am but a humble bank auditor/independant thinking righty/not an insider. I would respond in kind to your hatefilled/shallow/name-ist comment by calling you an ignorant/pathetic/twisting socialist/envirofascist/Winstonite, but I’m too much of a gentleman. You Bastard.
In conclusion; black is white, the sun rises in the West and this government is in no way corrupt/incompetent/doomed to one term. That’s a fact or my name’s not Tim Ellis.
Is that you Hels how’s the weather in New York ?
Is that you, Tim? How’s the weather in Purgatory?
looks like the beginnings of a snowman with a Stahlhelm
I’m cooler than the other guy in a motorcycle helmet! Right guys?
Bloody maaaarvellous!!!! Whose our man on the inside in Key’s advisory group? Keep up the good work for 2 more years mate.
Realising he could never quite pull off looking like Gerry Brownlee, John Key settled for the nearest equivalent – Herman Goering.
hehe. i wonder if he has a similar interest in powder blue suits?
Did the Tuaman say punch like this or its time for lunch, any way as long as its free I am relaxed about it.
Is that DPF wearing a key mask ?
snigger
Terrified by their internal polling, and desperate to allay the growing perception of an effete, humourless socialist, the research team unveiled the “Keymanator”.
Is this really what you thought I should wear for tomorrow’s NZ Herald photo plug, Steve?
is the helmet in case he gets too excited, falls over and bumps his head?
Key, triumphant from his UN Assembly address, resplendent in his latest clown suit.