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John Key: Berlusconi of the south pacific

Written By: - Date published: 7:22 am, November 19th, 2011 - 20 comments
Categories: accountability, brand key, democracy under attack, election 2011, john key, leadership, national, parody, uncategorized - Tags:


hattip: William Joyce




20 comments on “John Key: Berlusconi of the south pacific”

  1. Bill 1

    And not forgetting Gerry Brownpants…

  2. Seen this?



    Article by Fran O’Sullivan titled – Key chases luck o’ the Irish – published New Zealand Herald July 20 2005;

    Key is clearly on a roll as he lists the options New Zealand could explore if it decided to abandon outdated ideology and take a more pragmatic approach to growing the economy.

    The former investment banker knows what he is talking about.

    As head of global foreign exchange for investment giant Merrill Lynch he shifted a considerable amount of his business to Ireland in the mid-1990s to take advantage of a 10 per cent tax rate for foreign investors.

    The investment was a runaway success.

    “We transferred across the aircraft leasing business, the complex interest rates derivatives business, the entire back office for global foreign exchange and a huge chunk of private clients’ business,” says Key.

    John Key’s National Party website bio proudly states his past employment record in banking;

    “John launched his investment banking career in New Zealand in the mid 80s. After 10 years in the New Zealand market he headed offshore, working in Singapore, London and Sydney for US investment banking giant Merrill Lynch. During that time he was in charge of a number of business units including global foreign exchange and European bond and derivative trading. In 1999 John was invited to join the Foreign Exchange Committee of the Federal Reserve Bank of NY and on two occasions undertook management studies at Harvard University in Boston.”


    • Investment banker, New Zealand for 10 years

    • Investment banker, Merrill Lynch 1995-2001

    • Member, Foreign Exchange Committee of the Federal Reserve Bank of

    New York 1999-2001

    John Key – The Unauthorised Biography

    – Weekend Herald Sat July 19 2008

    Merrill Lynch Senior Executive Steve Bollotti said of John Key “he revolutionised the blue blood investment banking sector.”

    Key explains: “I had a whole lot of people working for me who were at the cutting edge of delivering quite complex and new and innovative products. They tended to either be a new product or into a new market, usually the emerging markets, Russia, Brazil, Argentina. I wasn’t the guy sitting there dreaming it all up, but I was the guy who was responsible for those people.” Did he foresee the problems which resulted in the sub-prime crisis? “Was it hard to predict? Not really.”

    The products which underpinned the sub-prime boom – then bust – were hatched in 2004-2005, long after Key had left Merrill. Indeed, he says when he went back to London in 2007 he was “horrified” at the level of risk Merrill was running. “It was enormous and I just didn’t think that enough had changed to warrant that level of risk.”

    Back in the late 1990s Key was in his element, working at the centre of the universe for FX. He presided over around 140 dealers trading billions of dollars a day. The Asian markets came in in the morning and New York in the afternoon. “Within two years we went from being 43 in euromoney to number three,” Key says.


    Not only is John Key quite clearly lying about not being involved in complex derivatives at the exact time when a mix of deregulation and non-regulation of these toxic products went on to cause the global financial crisis but he is now setting about making New Zealand a money laundering 0% tax haven base for his banking sector buddies which various articles appearing in the foreign financial news media make clear his buddies are very much looking forward to it and are very impressed how he has thus far been able to do it on the sly; ”


    Penny Bright
    Independent Candidate for Epsom

    [email deleted]

    • ghostwhowalksnz 2.1

      Its too scary to think we came within about 1.5% of the votes from having these guys run the country from 2005

      • mik e 2.1.1

        Derivative trader Bankers trust yeah right bankrupt
        Merrill lynch bankrupt NewZealand economy bankrupt
        insider trading Kiwirail
        Everything JinxKey is involved in he jinxes
        NatJinxKey can spin his way out By lying avoiding
        Conman Key
        New Zilanders have been conned again by another unregulated financial Conman
        SCF, Bridge corp, Hanover,Nathans all run by Finacial Wizards that were found to be nothing more than flim flam confidence tricksters
        Jinxed Key is the latest liar to be found out

    • mike 2.2

      Nice link Penny. So Key is quietly planning to screw NZ the way he screwed Ireland? By making us a tax haven for his rich buddies. Thus NZ gets an illusory economic boost and he can say “see what a good job I’m doing!” Then one day the rug gets pulled out, the money is withdrawn, John Key gets on a plane saying “thanks NZ, ackshully I’ve been great,” the economy goes pear-shaped and a Labour govt gets handed the mess.

  3. Fortran 4

    Winston will go with Labour if they get enough votes. Phil has said he will talk with him. John says no way (and I expect him to do that).
    Or call another election on a minority government.

    • Daveosaurus 4.1

      I think that any promise on Key’s part not to deal with Winston will be forgotten as quickly as “north of $50”, “we will not raise GST” or any of his other lies – sorry, I mean dinnemics. Come the 27th, it is most probable that Key will spend most of the day on the phone to Tauranga saying various variations on “Oh, Winston, please be gentle”.

      • mik e 4.1.1

        27th November ManKey:Cuppa tea Winnie
        Reply: johnny boy you know I only do deals over a bottle of whisKey come on be a Mankey.

    • mik e 4.2

      When has shonkey ever told the truth .Mankey is a power hungry egotist and has shown he’ll stoop to any level to keep it[smiling assassin listen to Brashs interview on morning report about key banks cuppa brash is having the last laugh{Brash chuckles as keys bungle is pointed out} as Key tries to roll him the second time]
      Key can lie his way through anything and smile while assassinating

    • mike 4.3

      You’re forgetting that things can get dinamic. Or more simply – John Key’s word is dogshit.

  4. Nick C 5

    This is just desperate and pathetic

    • insider 5.1

      Well based on the polls, desperate and pathetic is the only strategy left

      • mike 5.1.1

        Well that can’t be right, because then John Key, being so far ahead in the polls, wouldn’t have needed to be so desperate and pathetic over the teapot tapes.

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