Wellywood zombie arises

Written By: - Date published: 1:14 pm, May 21st, 2011 - 43 comments
Categories: scoundrels - Tags: ,

Wellington airport has decided to go ahead with its fucken ugly, stupid, unimaginative, probably illegal, laughable, hick-imitating-city-sophisticate ‘Wellywood’ sign. It’s “bullshit” says a Wellington director. “Try-hard” says a branding expert. Does the airport know they’re spending hundreds of thousands on what will immediately be bonfire fuel?

We went through this shit last year. 15,000 people joined an anti-Wellywood sign Facebook group. Thousands of parody signs were made. The only person who had a good thing to say about it was the awful Kerry Prendergast.

I just honestly don’t understand how Wellington Airport’s management can possibly believe this is a good idea. How out of touch with reality are these corporate elites?

There’s nothing to add beyond what my comrades wrote when the idea first came up:

Irish: Wellywood? Welly-hick more like it

Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with provincial towns, they’re part of what I really like about New Zealand but occasionally these wee towns throw up an idea that is so cringingly hick, so small-minded and embarrassing you can’t help but break out the language of the big-city snob.

In this case it’s Wellington’s turn to be the laughing-stock of anyone who doesn’t think guessing the weight of a sheep is a great day at the county fair.

And they’re doing it in grand bumpkin style with plans to erect a huge sign on the Miramar cut declaring the place to be “Wellywood”

That’s right, when people fly into our capital city the first impression they are going to get is of a city, if not a country, that is willing to crawlingly bastardize its name in order to try to gain just a little bit of reflected glamour from a city on the other side of the world.

Marty: A sign of how corporates think

The more I think about the ‘Wellywood’ sign the angrier I get. Who does Wellington Airport think they are imposing this monstrosity on the people of Wellington without any consultation?

If you don’t know the city, the sign will be sitting above a roundabout at the end of the main road in and out of the Eastern suburbs. Everyone living there will have to pass it twice a day. And the poor sods in Hataitai will have their view of the harbour ruined by it.

I just don’t understand what is in the heads of the airport. Why do they think they can just act how they please without any consideration for the rest of us? Maybe it’s just another example of the corporate mentality in this country – a subtle blend of arrogance and idiocy, without a hint of taste.

It wouldn’t be so bad if it was a decent feature. But that’s the point, the airport didn’t even bother to ask the people who would have to put up with the sign if they liked it.

Still, it must be abundantly clear to even the thickest executive by now that there is incredible depth of opposition to this ugly, tacky sign (8,000 members in the anti-sign Facebook group in two days) and if it goes up it will soon be coming down…

… Update: I’ve just heard on the radio that the Hollywood sign is trademarked and the owners always decline requests to imitate it. The beautiful part was a representative of the trademark owners saying they encourage cities to do something that represents the uniqueness of their own communities.

And to top it all the bunker scene has weighed in. (The perpetrators have disabled embedding)

43 comments on “Wellywood zombie arises ”

  • Comments are now closed

  1. todd 1
    21 May 2011 at 1:17 pm

    Perhaps PRIVATE WOOD would be more fitting.

    • Chess Player 1.1
      21 May 2011 at 6:28 pm

      Nah…Wallywood sums it up – they take themselves a bit too seriously down there….

      • D-D-D-Damn ! 1.1.1
        22 May 2011 at 3:54 am

        Yeah, I’ve got no time for this embarrassing sign…BUT…A little less Wellington-bashing from our crass, money-grubbing, simple-minded northern friends, please.

        Aucklanders calling Wellingtonians “provincial”, now that really is hilarious !

  2. freedom 2
    21 May 2011 at 1:33 pm

    it appears we have a classic If they build it, It will come down, kind of moment

  3. Treetop 3
    21 May 2011 at 1:43 pm

    In March 1989 around 9 pm there was a major scrub fire which took two minutes to race up the Maupuia hill, 150 metres heading left of the proposed Wellywood sign. I was in the path of the fire until it skipped to the left. There was also another fire that night at South Wellington Intermediate. I thought that I was imagining hearing fire engine sirens, but I wasn’t. (I went to stay at my parents home in Berhampore near the intermediate the night of the Maupuia fire). Both fires were major fires.

  4. todd 4
    21 May 2011 at 2:18 pm

    I wonder how much the security fence and guards will cost?

  5. Hilary 5
    21 May 2011 at 2:38 pm

    Doesn’t Mosgiel already have a similar one? Isn’t that enough?

    • Draco T Bastard 5.1
      21 May 2011 at 3:40 pm

      found it

      And yes, one copy is enough.

    • felix 5.2
      21 May 2011 at 7:35 pm

      The Mosgeil one has a lot more style and sophistication than the Wellywood proposal.

      For one thing it’s the actual name of the town – something people who live there can be proud of – as opposed to a lame pun that was never really that clever but even if it ever was is definitely well played out by now. So there’s that.

      And also the Mosgeil one is just a big sign which visually suggests an ironic, slightly self-deprecating but ultimately warm and light-hearted joke about small town life at the bottom of the world, as opposed to an unnecessarily ostentatious and grandiose statement posing as ironic humility. So there’s that as well.

      Mosgeil, in this instance, is smarter than Wellington. More sophisticated. More stylish. Srsly.

      • James Newtown 5.2.1
        21 May 2011 at 9:03 pm

        I normally wouldn’t say anything, but the number of times you made the spelling error of calling it ‘Mosgeil’ has made me feel rather unhappy, unless it’s some sort of joke that flying straight over my head. I before e except after c…

        • Lanthanide 5.2.1.1
          21 May 2011 at 11:09 pm

          ancient, species, science, sufficient, seize, weird, eider, either, height, foreign, leisure, counterfeit, forfeit, neither, atheist, their

          • McFlock 5.2.1.1.1
            21 May 2011 at 11:20 pm

            and Water of Leith, a stream in Dunedin

            • terryg 5.2.1.1.1.1
              22 May 2011 at 3:56 am

              ya.

              i before e except after c unless it doesnt apply

              fat lot of use a “rule”like that is.

              • Peter Johansson …
                22 May 2011 at 9:49 am

                It’s good rule for unifying error: 2% of the words are spelled correctly and the other 98% are spelled incorrectly, but at least in the same way. An attempt at grammatical relativism, at it’s best. If a word is spelled wrong and no one notices, is it really spelled wrong at all?

                A bit like the proposed changes to the left turn road rule, except that goes one step further, inventing the new philosophy of legislative idiocy. Right becomes wrong and wrong becomes right. Should be easy to reduce crime in NZ to zero with that kind of thinking.

  6. dave brown 6
    21 May 2011 at 3:15 pm

    What’s wrong with Warnerstown?

    • Tiger Mountain 6.1
      21 May 2011 at 4:48 pm

      Excellent suggestion Dave, if accompanied by a graphic bared backside.

      • Rex Widerstrom 6.1.1
        21 May 2011 at 7:47 pm

        And the tongue. Don’t forget the huge tongue. We would turn it into a waterslide, from the top of the hill into the harbour… at least there’d be some benefit to the locals.

        Or if we’re going for body parts, a giant upraised middle finger, a message from the airport to the people of Wellington.

        Given that the last bunch of pasty white ignorant wankers who went round erecting structures other people found offensive right were the KKK, how ironic that this giant insult will also no doubt be set alight. How I wish I were back there to contribute a burning torch (I don’t normally carry one, But I’m sure I could borrow Garth McVicar’s for the evening).

  7. Jeff 7
    21 May 2011 at 3:15 pm

    I used to work in Mosgiel about 23 years ago, just after the Mosgiel sign went up. It caused some considerable snickering from those in Dunedin.

    At least the Mosgiel sign announces the town’s correct name. It is also placed to be visible from Highway 1, and serves a function of announcing the existence of Mosgiel to people who are driving to Dunedin. It probably serves its aim of getting some travellers to divert in, and pay the town a visit. So it serves a real function.

    This horrible idea of a Wellywood sign won’t even have that function, as the people who see it are already either here, or just about to leave.

  8. the sprout 8
    21 May 2011 at 3:20 pm

    It’s a magnificent ode to the total absence of any imagination.
    A stunning masterpiece of unoriginality.

  9. Jan 9
    21 May 2011 at 4:22 pm

    Is there a word that captures the essence of cringe – but magnifies it exponentially?

  10. Adele 10
    21 May 2011 at 4:35 pm

    Teenaa koe, Jan

    A welly ‘woody’ perhaps?

  11. Irascible 11
    21 May 2011 at 4:43 pm

    The sign is totally in keeping with the Key-led govt resolute cultural cringe policies.
    I’m sure that the sign is justified and will be endorsed by Key, who will be BMWed to the road below the site from whence he will be helicoptered above it to unveil it to the world, as he announces that this is a vindication of his sale of the NZ legislature to Warner Bros along with the $60million sweetener he gave to keep Hobbits in Miramar.

  12. Armchair Critic 12
    21 May 2011 at 6:27 pm

    Obviously the people who advised ACT to reanimate Don Brash are also advising Wellington Airport.

  13. marsman 13
    21 May 2011 at 6:36 pm

    DOLLARWOOD? But seriously.It’s sheer corporate arrogance to want to mar a green hillside with a rip-off, totally crappy sign.

    • Rex Widerstrom 14.1
      21 May 2011 at 7:49 pm

      Brilliant, sprout!

      With the subtitle (do signs have subtitles? Well this one should): They told us not to erect it: we said “stiff”.

  15. felix 15
    21 May 2011 at 7:13 pm

    Do it Wellington, who gives a shit.

    You will need to STFU about being the “creative” capital though, obviously.

  16. weka 16
    21 May 2011 at 8:00 pm

    “That’s right, when people fly into our capital city the first impression they are going to get is of a city, if not a country, that is willing to crawlingly bastardize its name in order to try to gain just a little bit of reflected glamour from a city on the other side of the world.”

    Kind of appropriate though, given we’re selling our collective soul and the rest of the country to the god of Tourism anyway.

    Don’t they need resource consent to put up something that big?

  17. ZeeBop 17
    21 May 2011 at 9:50 pm

    Instant history. The real Hollywood sign was an real estate advert for the area.
    Just passover a whole bunch of kiwi culture and imitate a classic, who was
    pissing in their beer that night.

  18. stever 18
    21 May 2011 at 10:42 pm

    It all really sums up “the management” in NZ really—right form the PM and FInance minister downwards. They are incapable of genuine invention, discovery or originality—and when they do see it they feel so inadequate they squash it. Look at how the Universities and R&D is treated here.

    We’re becoming a cargo cult for innovation—and this is just a simple illustration of that sad, sad fact.

  19. ak 19
    22 May 2011 at 2:16 am

    Right-wing humour

    Right-wing empathy

    The ghoulish glamour

    Of Mauler Benefit sympathy

    Serving dainty tea

    Neath Arbeit macht frei

    As Joky Hen

    In a tiki tee

    Thrusts his shark-eyed love

    On an innocent puhi

    On Paul Reeves sleeve

    The gap is now a chasm

    And enough

    Is now surely,

    a FUCKING nough.

    If this erection gains traction, consider malefaction: time over for calm, break out the napalm.

    .

  20. terryg 20
    22 May 2011 at 3:59 am

    here’s an idea: spoof some wellington council letterheady thing (but not quite – misspell something so as not to get nicked for forgery/fraud eg wallington), and write to the rights holder asking for permission.

    then publish the “no piss off” response…..

  21. vto 21
    22 May 2011 at 8:31 am

    It seems clear to me that the letters “.ell….” need to be changed for “.ank…..”.

  22. weka 22
    22 May 2011 at 11:29 am

    http://wellywood.skullandbones.co.nz/gallery.html

    http://wellywood.skullandbones.co.nz/

    Apparently skull and bones got a cease and desist letter for that website, but it’s still up so I guess Hollywood’s arm doesn’t reach that far.

  23. Brett Dale 23
    22 May 2011 at 1:04 pm

    This sign has nothing to do with Hollywood or Peter Jackson or John Key, perhaps if you guys got the chip of your shoulder about America and Capitalism and complain to the right people you could get this eyesore stopped.

  24. randal 24
    23 May 2011 at 12:07 pm

    dompost banner this morning, “is this crass”. of course it is crass. its something some drunk screamer in a little black number shrieked out ata arts do somewhere and it got out of hand. thats the way decisions are made here!

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    The work begins Philip Crump wrote this article ahead of the new government being sworn in yesterday – Later today the new National-led coalition government will be sworn in, and the hard work begins. At the core of government will be three men – each a leader ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago

  • Black Friday
    As everyone who watches television or is on the mailing list for any of our major stores will confirm, “Black Friday” has become the longest running commercial extravaganza and celebration in our history. Although its origins are obscure (presumably dreamt up by American salesmen a few years ago), it has ...
    Bryan GouldBy Bryan Gould
    5 days ago

  • In Defense of the Media.
    Yesterday the Ministers in the next government were sworn in by our Governor General. A day of tradition and ceremony, of decorum and respect. Usually.But yesterday Winston Peters, the incoming Deputy Prime Minister, and Foreign Minister, of our nation used it, as he did with the signing of the coalition ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    5 days ago

  • Top 10 news links at 10 am for Tuesday, Nov 28
    Nicola Willis’ first move was ‘spilling the tea’ on what she called the ‘sobering’ state of the nation’s books, but she had better be able to back that up in the HYEFU. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: Here’s my pick of top 10 news links elsewhere at 10 am ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago

  • PT use up but fare increases coming
    Yesterday Auckland Transport were celebrating, as the most recent Sunday was the busiest Sunday they’ve ever had. That’s a great outcome and I’m sure the ...
    Greater AucklandBy Matt L
    5 days ago

  • The very opposite of social investment
    Nicola Willis (in blue) at the signing of the coalition agreement, before being sworn in as both Finance Minister and Social Investment Minister. National’s plan to unwind anti-smoking measures will benefit her in the first role, but how does it stack up from a social investment viewpoint? Photo: Lynn Grieveson ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago

  • Giving Tuesday
    For the first time "in history" we decided to jump on the "Giving Tuesday" bandwagon in order to make you aware of the options you have to contribute to our work! Projects supported by Skeptical Science Inc. Skeptical Science Skeptical Science is an all-volunteer organization but ...
    Skeptical Science
    5 days ago

  • Let's open the books with Nicotine Willis
    Let’s say it’s 1984,and there's a dreary little nation at the bottom of the Pacific whose name rhymes with New Zealand,and they've just had an election.Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, will you look at the state of these books we’ve opened,cries the incoming government, will you look at all this mountain ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    6 days ago

  • Climate Change: Stopping oil
    National is promising to bring back offshore oil and gas drilling. Naturally, the Greens have organised a petition campaign to try and stop them. You should sign it - every little bit helps, and as the struggle over mining conservation land showed, even National can be deterred if enough people ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    6 days ago

  • Don’t accept Human Rights Commission reading of data on Treaty partnership – read the survey fin...
    Wellington is braced for a “massive impact’ from the new government’s cutting public service jobs, The Post somewhat grimly reported today. Expectations of an economic and social jolt are based on the National-Act coalition agreement to cut public service numbers in each government agency in a cost-trimming exercise  “informed by” head ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago

  • The stupidest of stupid reasons
    One of the threats in the National - ACT - NZ First coalition agreements was to extend the term of Parliament to four years, reducing our opportunities to throw a bad government out. The justification? Apparently, the government thinks "elections are expensive". This is the stupidest of stupid reasons for ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    6 days ago

  • A website bereft of buzz
    Buzz from the Beehive The new government was being  sworn in, at time of writing , and when Point of Order checked the Beehive website for the latest ministerial statements and re-visit some of the old ones we drew a blank. We found ….  Nowt. Nothing. Zilch. Not a ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago

  • MICHAEL BASSETT: A new Ministry – at last
    Michael Bassett writes – Like most people, I was getting heartily sick of all the time being wasted over the coalition negotiations. During the first three weeks Winston grinned like a Cheshire cat, certain he’d be needed; Chris Luxon wasted time in lifting the phone to Winston ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago

  • Luxon's Breakfast.
    The Prime Minister elect had his silver fern badge on. He wore it to remind viewers he was supporting New Zealand, that was his team. Despite the fact it made him look like a concierge, or a welcomer in a Koru lounge. Anna Burns-Francis, the Breakfast presenter, asked if he ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    6 days ago

  • LINDSAY MITCHELL:  Oranga Tamariki faces major upheaval under coalition agreement
     Lindsay Mitchell writes – A hugely significant gain for ACT is somewhat camouflaged by legislative jargon. Under the heading ‘Oranga Tamariki’ ACT’s coalition agreement contains the following item:   Remove Section 7AA from the Oranga Tamariki Act 1989 According to Oranga Tamariki:     “Section ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago

  • BRIAN EASTON:  Peters as Minister
    A previous column looked at Winston Peters biographically. This one takes a closer look at his record as a minister, especially his policy record. Brian Easton writes – 1990-1991: Minister of Māori Affairs. Few remember Ka Awatea as a major document on the future of Māori policy; there is ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago

  • Cathrine Dyer's guide to watching COP 28 from the bottom of a warming planet
    Is COP28 largely smoke and mirrors and a plan so cunning, you could pin a tail on it and call it a weasel? Photo: Getty ImagesTL;DR: COP28 kicks off on November 30 and up for negotiation are issues like the role of fossil fuels in the energy transition, contributions to ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    6 days ago

  • Top 10 news links at 10 am for Monday, Nov 27
    PM Elect Christopher Luxon was challenged this morning on whether he would sack Adrian Orr and Andrew Coster.TL;DR: Here’s my pick of top 10 news links elsewhere at 10 am on Monday November 27, including:Signs councils are putting planning and capital spending on hold, given a lack of clear guidance ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    6 days ago

  • Gordon Campbell on the new government’s policies of yesteryear
    This column expands on a Werewolf column published by Scoop on Friday Routinely, Winston Peters is described as the kingmaker who gets to decide when the centre right or the centre-left has a turn at running this country. He also plays a less heralded but equally important role as the ...
    Gordon CampbellBy lyndon
    6 days ago

  • The New Government’s Agreements
    Last Friday, almost six weeks after election day, National finally came to an agreement with ACT and NZ First to form a government. They also released the agreements between each party and looking through them, here are the things I thought were the most interesting (and often concerning) from the. ...
    Greater AucklandBy Matt L
    6 days ago

  • How many smokers will die to fund the tax cuts?
    Maori and Pasifika smoking rates are already over twice the ‘all adult’ rate. Now the revenue that generates will be used to fund National’s tax cuts. Photo: Getty ImagesTL;DR: The devil is always in the detail and it emerged over the weekend from the guts of the policy agreements National ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    6 days ago

  • How the culture will change in the Beehive
    Perhaps the biggest change that will come to the Beehive as the new government settles in will be a fundamental culture change. The era of endless consultation will be over. This looks like a government that knows what it wants to do, and that means it knows what outcomes ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    6 days ago

  • No More Winnie Blues.
    So what do you think of the coalition’s decision to cancel Smokefree measures intended to stop young people, including an over representation of Māori, from taking up smoking? Enabling them to use the tax revenue to give other people a tax cut?David Cormack summed it up well:It seems not only ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    7 days ago

  • 2023 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #47
    A chronological listing of news and opinion articles posted on the Skeptical Science  Facebook Page during the past week: Sun, Nov 19, 2023 thru Sat, Nov 25, 2023.  Story of the Week World stands on frontline of disaster at Cop28, says UN climate chief  Exclusive: Simon Stiell says leaders must ‘stop ...
    Skeptical Science
    1 week ago

  • Some of it is mad, some of it is bad and some of it is clearly the work of people who are dangerous ...
    On announcement morning my mate texted:Typical of this cut-price, fake-deal government to announce itself on Black Friday.What a deal. We lose Kim Hill, we gain an empty, jargonising prime minister, a belligerent conspiracist, and a heartless Ayn Rand fanboy. One door closes, another gets slammed repeatedly in your face.It seems pretty ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    1 week ago

  • “Revolution” is the threat as the Māori Party smarts at coalition government’s Treaty directi...
    Buzz from the Beehive Having found no fresh announcements on the government’s official website, Point of Order turned today to Scoop’s Latest Parliament Headlines  for its buzz. This provided us with evidence that the Māori Party has been soured by the the coalition agreement announced yesterday by the new PM. “Soured” ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    1 week ago

  • The Good, the Bad, and the even Worse.
    Yesterday the trio that will lead our country unveiled their vision for New Zealand.Seymour looking surprisingly statesmanlike, refusing to rise to barbs about his previous comments on Winston Peters. Almost as if they had just been slapstick for the crowd.Winston was mostly focussed on settling scores with the media, making ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    1 week ago

  • When it Comes to Palestine – Free Speech is Under Threat
    Hi,Thanks for getting amongst Mister Organ on digital — thanks to you, we hit the #1 doc spot on iTunes this week. This response goes a long way to helping us break even.I feel good about that. Other things — not so much.New Zealand finally has a new government, and ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    1 week ago

  • Thank you Captain Luxon. Was that a landing, or were we shot down?
    Hello! Here comes the Saturday edition of More Than A Feilding, catching you up on the past week’s editions.Also in More Than A FeildingFriday The unboxing And so this is Friday and what have we gone and done to ourselves?In the same way that a Christmas present can look lovely under the ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    1 week ago

  • Cans of Worms.
    “And there’ll be no shortage of ‘events’ to test Luxon’s political skills. David Seymour wants a referendum on the Treaty. Winston wants a Royal Commission of Inquiry into Labour’s handling of the Covid crisis. Talk about cans of worms!”LAURIE AND LES were very fond of their local. It was nothing ...
    Bowalley Road
    1 week ago

  • Disinformation campaigns are undermining democracy. Here’s how we can fight back
    This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article. Misinformation is debated everywhere and has justifiably sparked concerns. It can polarise the public, reduce health-protective behaviours such as mask wearing and vaccination, and erode trust in science. Much of misinformation is spread not ...
    Skeptical Science
    1 week ago

  • Peters as Minister
    A previous column looked at Winston Peters biographically. This one takes a closer look at his record as a minister, especially his policy record.1990-1991: Minister of Māori Affairs. Few remember Ka Awatea as a major document on the future of Māori policy; there is not even an entry in Wikipedia. ...
    PunditBy Brian Easton
    1 week ago

  • New Zealand welcomes European Parliament vote on the NZ-EU Free Trade Agreement
    A significant milestone in ratifying the NZ-EU Free Trade Agreement (FTA) was reached last night, with 524 of the 705 member European Parliament voting in favour to approve the agreement. “I’m delighted to hear of the successful vote to approve the NZ-EU FTA in the European Parliament overnight. This is ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago

  • Further humanitarian support for Gaza, the West Bank and Israel
    The Government is contributing a further $5 million to support the response to urgent humanitarian needs in Gaza, the West Bank and Israel, bringing New Zealand’s total contribution to the humanitarian response so far to $10 million. “New Zealand is deeply saddened by the loss of civilian life and the ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    2 weeks ago

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