Imperator Fish: The Labour Party plot to kill Cameron Slater: the shocking evidence

Written By: - Date published: 6:00 pm, November 27th, 2014 - 33 comments
Categories: humour, Satire - Tags:

Scott at Imperator Fish kindly let’s us syndicate his posts.  This one is originally here.

 

Cameron Slater has claimed that people within Labour have tried to kill him.

Shortly after Slater made this astonishing claim, I received from an anonymous source a recording of a conversation between senior Labour Party members in which a plan to kill Slater is discussed. A transcript of this conversation is below. 

The four speakers do not identify themselves in the recording, although I suspect I know who they are. I have labelled the four speakers A, B, C and D.

Slater has since claimed he never said Labour were trying to kill him, but the evidence is clear. Has he been intimidated by Labour Party operatives to stay silent?

I will of course co-operate fully with any police investigation into this shocking plot to kill Cameron Slater, although I don’t know the identity of the person who sent the recording to me. 

Transcript of meeting to plan murder of Cameron Slater

A: So it’s agreed then? Cameron Slater must die.

B: Agreed.

C: Yes!

D: And the sooner the better. But how are we going to kill him? Who will do the deed?

B: We’ll have to hire a hitman.

C: No, we can’t afford a professional killer. We don’t have that sort of money, and how would we find someone? Do any of us have any underworld contacts?

A: We’ll have to do this ourselves.

B: That could be messy. Slater is quite… large.

A: Can I just say here that I don’t think I should be involved in the actual killing. I get terrible lumbago, and I hate to think what might happen if there was any sort of struggle.

C: And I faint at the sight of blood, so I’m out.

B: Maybe this is a job for Young Labour. They’re impressionable and idealistic and they already hate Slater, so all we need to do is convince them it’s for the good of the party.

A: That’s a bad idea. This needs to be done quietly. It’ll be all over Twitter and Facebook if we leave it to Young Labour.

D: Well we need to make some decisions if we want it done.

A: It needs a committee. Let’s agree to establish a committee to look at the options, and to select appropriately qualified assassins.

B: I’m all for that. But who will be on the committee? This is a major decision, and we can’t afford to get it wrong.

C: We will need to ensure we get the gender balance right. The committee will need to be at least half women.

A: Don’t be so ridiculous. It’s more important that we find the right person for the job, and if those people just happen to be men, then so be it.

C: So what you’re effectively saying is that men are more effective at plotting murder than women. I for one am utterly offended by your suggestion. It’s exactly the sort of dinosaur attitude I would expect from an entitled white male like you. Women have historically proven themselves just as effective as men when it comes to murderous scheming. Our problem has been a lack of opportunity, not ability.

B: It ought to be sixty percent women, not fifty. Women have missed out in the past on opportunities to plot to kill their political opponents, so this will send a clear message that we are serious about increasing female participation in the murder committee sector.

A: Sixty percent isn’t equality. It’s domination!

C: So what? Now you know how we feel. Women have been trampled down and oppressed for centuries.

D: I’m fine with that, provided we also agree to recognise the principles of partnership that underpin the Treaty of Waitangi. Will half of the committee members be Maori?

C: Good idea. We should also consult widely with iwi groups to make sure their voices are heard. They may well have a valuable contribution to make when it comes to assassination methods.

D: We should also seek representation from Rainbow Labour on the committee.

C: And don’t forget Young Labour.

A: No, I’ve already explained why Young Labour have to be kept out of this.

B: Frankly I’m disgusted by your patronising attitude towards young people. It’s no wonder so few young people want to be involved in the political process these days.

C: Has anyone stopped to consider the environmental impact of what we are proposing to do?

B: I’m actually more concerned about whether what we are proposing is strictly permitted under the party’s constitution. Don’t you think we ought to be establishing a separate branch of the party under the constitution?

C: I hadn’t thought of that. I agree. It’s important that we follow proper processes. Let’s agree to establish a branch. We’ll call it the “Cameron Slater Must Die Branch.”

A: Sounds good. Does anyone have a copy of the constitution? What’s the process for establishing a branch?

C: I have a copy here. Let me see… Oh, here it is. Rule fifteen. “When ten or more persons desire to form a new Branch of the Party they shall make application through their local Labour Electorate Committee for recommendation to the New Zealand Council. The ten or more persons, being founder members of a branch, must be resident in that particular electorate. Dispensations from this Rule are not available for those wishing to participate in the establishment of a new branch.” And then there’s rule sixteen. “When ten or more persons desire to form a new Branch of the Party, an application for approval for the formation of the new branch must be made to the Labour Electorate Committee, with a copy of the application to be sent to Head Office. The Labour Electorate Committee must make a prompt recommendation to the New Zealand Council either recommending approval or decline of the application. In the event of a recommendation of decline, the New Zealand Council must consult further before final approval. In the event of a recommendation of acceptance, the New Zealand Council continues to be the final arbiter as to whether the branch shall be accepted or not. In the event of the Labour Electorate Committee recommending declining the application, then reasons for their decision must be forwarded to the branch formation people. The Council shall then decide whether or not the Branch is registered. The application must be accompanied by the registration fee as set by Annual Conference for each founder member registered, together with a list of their names and addresses.”

D: So we need ten people from the same electorate to fill in the form, and then we need the local LEC to recommend us to the New Zealand Council, and then the New Zealand Council needs to approve our application.

A: There’s another problem. I’m not convinced that murdering Cameron Slater is entirely consistent with Labour’s policy platform. Take this bit: “Labour recognises that the social contract exists between the citizen and the state. As a consequence, any breaches of the social contract need to be resolved through public, and not private, means.” So shouldn’t Cameron Slater’s murder be undertaken by the state?

B: We could always put forward a remit to change  the policy platform at the annual conference. How about this as a remit? “Labour recognises that from time to time annoying and nasty little right wing shits will need to be despatched with extreme prejudice, and our justice system should permit anyone who wishes to kill Cameron Slater to do so.”

C: I like it.

A: But conference is months away, guys. We can’t wait that long.

C: I don’t see any choice. These things need to be done properly.

A: Agreed. So we look to pass a remit at the annual conference, then we establish the Cameron Slater Must Die Branch, and then we form a branch committee to look at options for killing Cameron Slater. We ensure we have proper representation on the committee from all key groups, including women, Rainbow Labour and Tangata Whenua, and then we consult with environmental groups to ensure our plan is sustainable and won’t adversely impact the environment.

B: Don’t forget that the rules of the branch will need to be written in both English and Maori.

A: Yes, of course. That’s a given.

C: In the interests of fairness and social justice, I think we should also consult with Cameron Slater. He may well have a valuable perspective on how any assassination ought to be undertaken. We need to make sure we kill him in a culturally appropriate way.

A: That’s reasonable. Let’s agree a timeframe for all of this. Shall we aim to have the structure in place within five years?

B: Oh, that’s cutting things fine. There’s an awful lot to do. Let’s say ten.

A: Done!

33 comments on “Imperator Fish: The Labour Party plot to kill Cameron Slater: the shocking evidence ”

  1. vto 1

    that is as funny as slaters claim itself

    god hes a douche

    and feral scum

  2. Tracey 2

    they tried to kill him – text on monday
    They didnt try to kill him – reported in herald today
    They knew he had mental problems so wanted to push him to kill himself – tv3 news tonight

    If he evolves this much more, by tomorrow morning he will be a dolphin!

    • greywarshark 2.1

      @ Tracey
      That sounds a serious involvement – you know that lprent has a dolphin as his talisman.
      Surely you aren’t indicating that he would be involved? Where did you hear that then?

      • b waghorn 2.1.1

        you cannot kill a whale with a dolphin you need a shark a big raw shark

        • Don Robertson 2.1.1.1

          Hmmm .. the Japanese might have some spare equipment for this sort of thing. But I guess we should stick with a local outfit.

    • McFlock 2.2

      Actually, I wouldn’t be surprised if it turned out that someone seriously and in good faith suggested to him that he get help.

  3. greywarshark 3

    I’m only half way through but it is a delicious light confection. I am saving it for pudding.

    • Anne 3.1

      After dinner coffee is best. Then you can splurt into the coffee mug instead of all over the food.

      Btw, that’s exactly how it would happen but being the Labour Party it would take at least 20 years to organise by which time….

  4. ghostwhowalksnz 4

    Its obvious, we have to make the hit on Slater look ‘contested’, was it Jason Eade, was it Blomfield, was it a feral……

    Its even better if we make him disappear, that way no one knows the real truth, just like the Prime Ministers answers.

    So after the deed is done, make sure all emails and phone txts are deleted, that will stymie any investigation for good

  5. Wynston Cooper 5

    Love it!

  6. coaster 6

    This whole thing is just bizarre, I bet sutton is breathing a sigh of releif.

    clearly whaleoil thrives in the limelight, almost as much as the pm.

  7. Kiwiri - Raided of the Last Shark 7

    Arghhhhhhhhhhhhh … that is just so funny and so realistic in many ways regarding how some of my Labour mates go about discussing policies to put forward.
    Hilarious! Laughing so hard that the post is killing me.

  8. greywarshark 8

    I think if we are to have a robust defence against RW with extreme prejudice we are going to have to use the Ankh Morpork model. They recognised that sometimes bad deeds and bad sausages would appear and made the necessary provision for them.

  9. cogito 9

    No need for a plot. Slater is self-destructing just fine.

  10. darkhorse 10

    if anyone would want him [RL: Deleted. There’s a difference between satire and silly] they are likely to be members of the national party. Slater is a gold mine for the left.

  11. Slater’s grasp on reality is slipping into delusion. The poor bugger is his own worst enemy.

  12. dale 12

    That was very funny, loved it.
    And that is why the voters don’t want Labour in charge. Every decision will go through that process exactly. Except when it comes time to dump Little.

  13. Colonial Rawshark 13

    Where are the affiliates in all this scheming?! MIA!!!

    • Macro 13.1

      Very interesting observation that C R!
      Narrows down the field of would be plotters considerably I would say.
      Can’t have the affiliates involved – look how they voted!
      🙂

  14. Clemgeopin 14

    Very funny! Well written.
    My intuition is that Key destroyed Slater and Collins to suit himself, and now Slater will destroy Key slowly and steadily to suit himself.

  15. Murray Rawshark 15

    I think it’s disgusting that Labour is still leaking. Whoever gave these minutes to Mr Fish should stop it and just get behind the new leader.

  16. chris73 16

    I doubt theres much point in posting this but from the man himself, he never said the Labour party were trying to kill him, he said it was people involved with the hacking of his hard drives who wanted him to “do a Dawson” and drive him to commit suicide based on his having depression

    The Labour party thing came from the MSM, the same MSM that are completely above board in everything they do

    • Wrong. Slater’s own words:

      Prime Minister: Hopefully it will all come out in time
      Cameron Slater: I wish they would hurry up…they played the real dirty politics…even tried to kill me…I have evidence of.

      http://www.3news.co.nz/nznews/john-key-cameron-slater-text-messages-released-2014112623#ixzz3KIkNX25K

      • tricledrown 16.1.1

        Slater continues to reinforce the term RWNJ.
        Selfdestructing and sabotaging In Camerons mental state he is more likely to take his own life.
        John Key and his cronies should be ashamed of themselves for encouraging Cameron to become more obsessed.
        Mind you Key,s own moral compass is boderline psyhcopathic and compulsive as in liar.
        People who have mental health problems tend to hang out together!

      • Anne 16.1.2

        Prime Minister: Hopefully it will all come out in time

        Hard to conceive of a NZ Prime Minister responding in that way to Slater’s claims:

        Prime Minister: It’s a joke isn’t it. They will attack Jason for talking to u and they break the confidentiality agreement. Classic lab.
        Cameron Slater: Yup…I’m very angry over it…Goff is the one who leaked oravida stuff too.
        Cameron Slater: They still have standard bloggers on staff
        Cameron Slater: And Mccarten was involved in hack…

        If Key is so extraordinarily naive as to believe these claims – and the wording suggests he does – then he shouldn’t be in parliament let alone prime-minister. Either that, or he is as warped an individual as Slater.

        • Macro 16.1.2.1

          “If Key is so extraordinarily naive as to believe these claims……– then he shouldn’t be in parliament let alone prime-minister. Either that, or he is as warped an individual as Slater.”

          I more and more tending toward the latter opinion.

          • Murray Rawshark 16.1.2.1.1

            I’ve held it for a few years now. Key only manages to behave himself when he has recently received instructions. The rest of the time he’s like a bullying schoolboy whose doting parents have just bought him an expensive toy.

  17. les 17

    well the plot explains the prescence of Russian Warships in the Sth Pacific…Labour has clearly enlisted its ‘red’ friends to take the great man out.

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    4 days ago
  • Two offenders, different treatments.
    See if you can spot the difference. An Iranian born female MP from a progressive party is accused of serial shoplifting. Her name is leaked to the media, which goes into a pack frenzy even before the Police launch an … Continue reading ...
    KiwipoliticoBy Pablo
    4 days ago
  • Treaty references omitted
    Ele Ludemann writes  – The government is omitting general Treaty references from legislation : The growth of Treaty of Waitangi clauses in legislation caused so much worry that a special oversight group was set up by the last Government in a bid to get greater coherence in the public service on Treaty ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • The Ghahraman Conflict
    What was that judge thinking? Peter Williams writes –  That Golriz Ghahraman and District Court Judge Maria Pecotic were once lawyer colleagues is incontrovertible. There is published evidence that they took at least one case to the Court of Appeal together. There was a report on ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • Bernard's Top 10 @ 10 'pick 'n' mix' for March 15
    TL;DR: My top 10 news and analysis links this morning include:Today’s must-read: Climate Scorpion – the sting is in the tail. Introducing planetary solvency. A paper via the University of Exeter’s Institute and Faculty of Actuaries.Local scoop: Kāinga Ora starts pulling out of its Auckland projects and selling land RNZ ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • The day Wellington up-zoned its future
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    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • Weekly Roundup 15-March-2024
    It’s Friday and we’re halfway through March Madness. Here’s some of the things that caught our attention this week. This Week in Greater Auckland On Monday Matt asked how we can get better event trains and an option for grade separating Morningside Dr. On Tuesday Matt looked into ...
    Greater AucklandBy Greater Auckland
    4 days ago
  • That Word.
    Something you might not know about me is that I’m quite a stubborn person. No, really. I don’t much care for criticism I think’s unfair or that I disagree with. Few of us do I suppose.Back when I was a drinker I’d sometimes respond defensively, even angrily. There are things ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    4 days ago
  • The Hoon around the week to March 15
    Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: The five things that mattered in Aotearoa’s political economy that we wrote and spoke about via The Kākā and elsewhere for paying subscribers in the last week included:PM Christopher Luxon said the reversal of interest deductibility for landlords was done to help renters, who ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • Labour’s policy gap
    It was not so much the Labour Party but really the Chris Hipkins party yesterday at Labour’s caucus retreat in Martinborough. The former Prime Minister was more or less consistent on wealth tax, which he was at best equivocal about, and social insurance, which he was not willing to revisit. ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    4 days ago
  • Skeptical Science New Research for Week #11 2024
    Open access notables A Glimpse into the Future: The 2023 Ocean Temperature and Sea Ice Extremes in the Context of Longer-Term Climate Change, Kuhlbrodt et al., Bulletin of the American Meteorological Society: In the year 2023, we have seen extraordinary extrema in high sea surface temperature (SST) in the North Atlantic and in ...
    5 days ago
  • Melissa remains mute on media matters but has something to say (at a sporting event) about economic ...
     Buzz from the Beehive   The text reproduced above appears on a page which records all the media statements and speeches posted on the government’s official website by Melissa Lee as Minister of Media and Communications and/or by Jenny Marcroft, her Parliamentary Under-secretary.  It can be quickly analysed ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    5 days ago
  • The return of Muldoon
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    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    5 days ago
  • Will the rental tax cut improve life for renters or landlords?
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    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • Geoffrey Miller: What Saudi Arabia’s rapid changes mean for New Zealand
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    Democracy ProjectBy Geoffrey Miller
    5 days ago
  • Racism’s double standards
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    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • It’s not a tax break
    Ele Ludemann writes – Contrary to what many headlines and news stories are saying, residential landlords are not getting a tax break. The government is simply restoring to them the tax deductibility of interest they had until the previous government removed it. There is no logical reason ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • The Plastic Pig Collective and Chris' Imaginary Friends.
    I can't remember when it was goodMoments of happiness in bloomMaybe I just misunderstoodAll of the love we left behindWatching our flashbacks intertwineMemories I will never findIn spite of whatever you becomeForget that reckless thing turned onI think our lives have just begunI think our lives have just begunDoes anyone ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    5 days ago
  • Who is responsible for young offenders?
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    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • Gordon Campbell on National’s fantasy trip to La La Landlord Land
    How much political capital is Christopher Luxon willing to burn through in order to deliver his $2.9 billion gift to landlords? Evidently, Luxon is: (a) unable to cost the policy accurately. As Anna Burns-Francis pointed out to him on Breakfast TV, the original ”rock solid” $2.1 billion cost he was ...
    5 days ago
  • Bernard's Top 10 @ 10 'pick 'n' mix' for March 14
    TL;DR: My top 10 news and analysis links this morning include:Today’s must-read: Jonathon Porritt calling bullshit in his own blog post on mainstream climate science as ‘The New Denialism’.Local scoop: The Wellington City Council’s list of proposed changes to the IHP recommendations to be debated later today was leaked this ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago
  • No, Prime Minister, rents don’t rise or fall with landlords’ costs
    TL;DR: Prime Minister Christopher Luxon said yesterday tenants should be grateful for the reinstatement of interest deductibility because landlords would pass on their lower tax costs in the form of lower rents. That would be true if landlords were regulated monopolies such as Transpower or Auckland Airport1, but they’re not, ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago
  • Cartoons: ‘At least I didn’t make things awkward’
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    5 days ago
  • Solving traffic congestion with Richard Prebble
    The business section of the NZ Herald is full of opinion. Among the more opinionated of all is the ex-Minister of Transport, ex-Minister of Railways, ex MP for Auckland Central (1975-93, Labour), Wellington Central (1996-99, ACT, then list-2005), ex-leader of the ACT Party, uncle to actor Antonia, the veritable granddaddy ...
    Greater AucklandBy Patrick Reynolds
    5 days ago
  • I Think I'm Done Flying Boeing
    Hi,Just quickly — I’m blown away by the stories you’ve shared with me over the last week since I put out the ‘Gary’ podcast, where I told you about the time my friend’s flatmate killed the neighbour.And you keep telling me stories — in the comments section, and in my ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    5 days ago
  • Invoking Aristotle: Of Rings of Power, Stones, and Ships
    The first season of Rings of Power was not awful. It was thoroughly underwhelming, yes, and left a lingering sense of disappointment, but it was more expensive mediocrity than catastrophe. I wrote at length about the series as it came out (see the Review section of the blog, and go ...
    6 days ago
  • Van Velden brings free-market approach to changing labour laws – but her colleagues stick to distr...
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    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago
  • Why Newshub failed
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    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago
  • Māori Party on the warpath against landlords and seabed miners – let’s see if mystical creature...
    Bob Edlin writes  –  The Māori Party has been busy issuing a mix of warnings and threats as its expresses its opposition to interest deductibility for landlords and the plans of seabed miners. It remains to be seen whether they  follow the example of indigenous litigants in Australia, ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago
  • There’s a name for this
    Every year, in the Budget, Parliament forks out money to government agencies to do certain things. And every year, as part of the annual review cycle, those agencies are meant to report on whether they have done the things Parliament gave them that money for. Agencies which consistently fail to ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    6 days ago
  • Echoes of 1968 in 2024?  Pocock on the repetitive problems of the New Left
    Mike Grimshaw writes – Recent events in American universities point to an underlying crisis of coherent thinking, an issue that increasingly affects the progressive left across the Western world. This of course is nothing new as anyone who can either remember or has read of the late ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago
  • Two bar blues
    The thing about life’s little victories is that they can be followed by a defeat.Reader Darryl told me on Monday night:Test again Dave. My “head cold” last week became COVID within 24 hours, and is still with me. I hear the new variants take a bit longer to show up ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    6 days ago
  • Bernard's Top 10 @ 10 'pick 'n' mix' for March 13
    TL;DR: My top 10 news and analysis links this morning include:Today’s must-read: Angus Deaton on rethinking his economics IMFLocal scoop: The people behind Tamarind, the firm that left a $500m cleanup bill for taxpayers at Taranaki’s Tui oil well, are back operating in Taranaki under a different company name. Jonathan ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    6 days ago

  • Positive progress for social worker workforce
    New Zealand’s social workers are qualified, experienced, and more representative of the communities they serve, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. “I want to acknowledge and applaud New Zealand’s social workers for the hard work they do, providing invaluable support for our most vulnerable. “To coincide with World ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 hours ago
  • Minister confirms reduced RUC rate for PHEVs
    Cabinet has agreed to a reduced road user charge (RUC) rate for plug-in hybrid electric vehicles (PHEVs), Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. Owners of PHEVs will be eligible for a reduced rate of $38 per 1,000km once all light electric vehicles (EVs) move into the RUC system from 1 April.  ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 hours ago
  • Trade access to overseas markets creates jobs
    Minister of Agriculture and Trade, Todd McClay, says that today’s opening of Riverland Foods manufacturing plant in Christchurch is a great example of how trade access to overseas markets creates jobs in New Zealand.  Speaking at the official opening of this state-of-the-art pet food factory the Minister noted that exports ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 hours ago
  • NZ and Chinese Foreign Ministers hold official talks
    Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters met with Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi in Wellington today. “It was a pleasure to host Foreign Minister Wang Yi during his first official visit to New Zealand since 2017. Our discussions were wide-ranging and enabled engagement on many facets of New Zealand’s relationship with China, including trade, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    21 hours ago
  • Kāinga Ora instructed to end Sustaining Tenancies
    Kāinga Ora – Homes & Communities has been instructed to end the Sustaining Tenancies Framework and take stronger measures against persistent antisocial behaviour by tenants, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “Earlier today Finance Minister Nicola Willis and I sent an interim Letter of Expectations to the Board of Kāinga Ora. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Speech to Auckland Business Chamber: Growth is the answer
    Tēna koutou katoa. Greetings everyone. Thank you to the Auckland Chamber of Commerce and the Honourable Simon Bridges for hosting this address today. I acknowledge the business leaders in this room, the leaders and governors, the employers, the entrepreneurs, the investors, and the wealth creators. The coalition Government shares your ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Singapore rounds out regional trip
    Minister Winston Peters completed the final leg of his visit to South and South East Asia in Singapore today, where he focused on enhancing one of New Zealand’s indispensable strategic partnerships.      “Singapore is our most important defence partner in South East Asia, our fourth-largest trading partner and a ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Minister van Velden represents New Zealand at International Democracy Summit
    Minister of Internal Affairs and Workplace Relations and Safety, Hon. Brooke van Velden, will travel to the Republic of Korea to represent New Zealand at the Third Summit for Democracy on 18 March. The summit, hosted by the Republic of Korea, was first convened by the United States in 2021, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Insurance Council of NZ Speech, 7 March 2024, Auckland
    ICNZ Speech 7 March 2024, Auckland  Acknowledgements and opening  Mōrena, ngā mihi nui. Ko Andrew Bayly aho, Nor Whanganui aho.  Good morning, it’s a privilege to be here to open the ICNZ annual conference, thank you to Mark for the Mihi Whakatau  My thanks to Tim Grafton for inviting me ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Five-year anniversary of Christchurch terror attacks
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Lead Coordination Minister Judith Collins have expressed their deepest sympathy on the five-year anniversary of the Christchurch terror attacks. “March 15, 2019, was a day when families, communities and the country came together both in sorrow and solidarity,” Mr Luxon says.  “Today we pay our respects to the 51 shuhada ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Speech for Financial Advice NZ Conference 5 March 2024
    Speech for Financial Advice NZ Conference 5 March 2024  Acknowledgements and opening  Morena, Nga Mihi Nui.  Ko Andrew Bayly aho, Nor Whanganui aho. Thanks Nate for your Mihi Whakatau  Good morning. It’s a pleasure to formally open your conference this morning. What a lovely day in Wellington, What a great ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Early visit to Indonesia strengthens ties
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters held discussions in Jakarta today about the future of relations between New Zealand and South East Asia’s most populous country.   “We are in Jakarta so early in our new government’s term to reflect the huge importance we place on our relationship with Indonesia and South ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • China Foreign Minister to visit
    Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters has announced that the Foreign Minister of China, Wang Yi, will visit New Zealand next week.  “We look forward to re-engaging with Foreign Minister Wang Yi and discussing the full breadth of the bilateral relationship, which is one of New Zealand’s ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Minister opens new Auckland Rail Operations Centre
    Transport Minister Simeon Brown has today opened the new Auckland Rail Operations Centre, which will bring together KiwiRail, Auckland Transport, and Auckland One Rail to improve service reliability for Aucklanders. “The recent train disruptions in Auckland have highlighted how important it is KiwiRail and Auckland’s rail agencies work together to ...
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    5 days ago
  • Celebrating 10 years of Crankworx Rotorua
    The Government is proud to support the 10th edition of Crankworx Rotorua as the Crankworx World Tour returns to Rotorua from 16-24 March 2024, says Minister for Economic Development Melissa Lee.  “Over the past 10 years as Crankworx Rotorua has grown, so too have the economic and social benefits that ...
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    5 days ago
  • Government delivering on tax commitments
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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Significant Natural Areas requirement to be suspended
    Associate Environment Minister Andrew Hoggard has today announced that the Government has agreed to suspend the requirement for councils to comply with the Significant Natural Areas (SNA) provisions of the National Policy Statement for Indigenous Biodiversity for three years, while it replaces the Resource Management Act (RMA).“As it stands, SNAs ...
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    5 days ago
  • Government classifies drought conditions in Top of the South as medium-scale adverse event
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    5 days ago
  • Government partnership to tackle $332m facial eczema problem
    The Government is helping farmers eradicate the significant impact of facial eczema (FE) in pastoral animals, Agriculture Minister Todd McClay announced.  “A $20 million partnership jointly funded by Beef + Lamb NZ, the Government, and the primary sector will save farmers an estimated NZD$332 million per year, and aims to ...
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    5 days ago
  • NZ, India chart path to enhanced relationship
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters has completed a successful visit to India, saying it was an important step in taking the relationship between the two countries to the next level.   “We have laid a strong foundation for the Coalition Government’s priority of enhancing New Zealand-India relations to generate significant future benefit for both countries,” says Mr Peters, ...
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    5 days ago
  • Ruapehu Alpine Lifts bailout the last, say Ministers
    Cabinet has agreed to provide $7 million to ensure the 2024 ski season can go ahead on the Whakapapa ski field in the central North Island but has told the operator Ruapehu Alpine Lifts it is the last financial support it will receive from taxpayers. Cabinet also agreed to provide ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Govt takes action to drive better cancer services
    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says the launch of a new mobile breast screening unit in Counties Manukau reinforces the coalition Government’s commitment to drive better cancer services for all New Zealanders. Speaking at the launch of the new mobile clinic, Dr Reti says it’s a great example of taking ...
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    6 days ago
  • Govt takes action to drive better cancer services
    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says the launch of a new mobile breast screening unit in Counties Manukau reinforces the coalition Government’s commitment to drive better cancer services for all New Zealanders. Speaking at the launch of the new mobile clinic, Dr Reti says it’s a great example of taking ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Work begins on SH29 upgrades near Tauriko
    Unlocking economic growth and land for housing are critical elements of the Government’s plan for our transport network, and planned upgrades to State Highway 29 (SH29) near Tauriko will deliver strongly on those priorities, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “The SH29 upgrades near Tauriko will improve safety at the intersections ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Work begins on SH29 upgrades near Tauriko
    Unlocking economic growth and land for housing are critical elements of the Government’s plan for our transport network, and planned upgrades to State Highway 29 (SH29) near Tauriko will deliver strongly on those priorities, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “The SH29 upgrades near Tauriko will improve safety at the intersections ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Fresh produce price drop welcome
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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Statement to the 68th United Nations Commission on the Status of Women
    Tēnā koutou katoa and greetings to you all.  Chair, I am honoured to address the sixty-eighth session of the Commission on the Status of Women. I acknowledge the many crises impacting the rights of women and girls. Heightened global tensions, war, climate related and humanitarian disasters, and price inflation all ...
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  • Speech to the 68th United Nations Commission on the Status of Women (CSW68)
    Tēnā koutou katoa and greetings to you all.  Chair, I am honoured to address the 68th session of the Commission on the Status of Women. I acknowledge the many crises impacting the rights of women and girls. Heightened global tensions, war, climate related and humanitarian disasters, and price inflation all ...
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    6 days ago
  • Government backs rural led catchment projects
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    6 days ago
  • Speech to Auckland Business Chamber
    Good evening everyone and thank you for that lovely introduction.   Thank you also to the Honourable Simon Bridges for the invitation to address your members. Since being sworn in, this coalition Government has hit the ground running with our 100-day plan, delivering the changes that New Zealanders expect of us. ...
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    7 days ago
  • Commission’s advice on ETS settings tabled
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    1 week ago
  • Government lowering building costs
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    1 week ago
  • Trustee tax change welcomed
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    1 week ago
  • Minister’s Ramadan message
    Assalaamu alaikum. السَّلَام عليكم In light of the holy month of Ramadan, I want to extend my warmest wishes to our Muslim community in New Zealand. Ramadan is a time for spiritual reflection, renewed devotion, perseverance, generosity, and forgiveness.  It’s a time to strengthen our bonds and appreciate the diversity ...
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    1 week ago
  • Minister appoints new NZTA Chair
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    1 week ago
  • Speech to Life Sciences Summit
    Good morning all, it is a pleasure to be here as Minister of Science, Innovation and Technology.  It is fantastic to see how connected and collaborative the life science and biotechnology industry is here in New Zealand. I would like to thank BioTechNZ and NZTech for the invitation to address ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Progress continues apace on water storage
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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Government agrees to restore interest deductions
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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Minister to attend World Anti-Doping Agency Symposium
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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago
  • Pacific Language Weeks celebrate regional unity
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    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 week ago

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