Caption contest
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9:36 am, October 25th, 2011 - 70 comments
Categories: caption contest, john key -
Tags: handshake, try hard
70 comments on “Caption contest ”
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- Release: Chris Hipkinsâ speech: New Zealand in 2040 â A vision worth fighting for
...17 hours ago - Release: 4,500 jobs lost â and countingMore than 4,500 jobs are set to go as the National Government continues its deep cuts to services to pay for irresponsible and ill-timed tax cuts. Â ...2 days ago
- No-cause evictions leave no hope for renters
The Governmentâs introduction of legislation that would enable landlords to end tenancies with no reason marks a dark day for the 1.4 million people who rent their home in Aotearoa. ...3 days ago - Release: National winding back mental health workThe Minister for Mental Health has found the Suicide Prevention Office and mental health support for 111 calls slipping through his fingers, says Labour spokesperson for Mental Health Ingrid Leary. ...4 days ago
- Government ignorant of evidence in neglect of tamarikiTodayâs justification from the Minister for Children for scrapping protections for our tamariki was either a case of ignorance or deliberate deception. ...5 days ago
- Gang policy setting communities up for failureThe Green Party says the Governmentâs misguided policy on gangs will fail, following the announcement of the establishment of a national gang unit and district gang disruption units to target gang activities. ...5 days ago
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- Charter schools not a serious solutionWe need serious investment and solutions into our education system, not a vanity project from David Seymour. ...5 days ago
- Release: Ideological charter schools wonât increase achievementThe Government bringing back 50 charter schools will not increase achievement and is a distraction from the core mission of the education system, Labour education spokesperson Jan Tinetti said. ...5 days ago
- Release: Visas needed for Palestinians with family in New ZealandThe Government must show some compassion and create a special visa to allow Palestinians with family in New Zealand to be reunited with them here. ...5 days ago
- Release: Govtâs stubbornness will harm MÄori childrenGovernment has remained stubborn and is ramming its Bill into the House today, which the Waitangi Tribunal has said will hurt vulnerable children. ...6 days ago
- âLucky dipâ process too casual for hearing critical submissions on Fast Track approvals billTe PÄti MÄori is showing extreme concern over the Environment Select Committees adoption of a lucky dip draw to determine hearings for the Fast Track Approvals bill. Of the 27,000 submissions, 2,900 requested to present. All organisations will be heard; however, the remaining 2,350 submitters will be subject to a ...6 days ago
- New Zealand First Memberâs Bill to protect womenâs spaces
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- Greens welcome cross-party approach to climate adaptationThe Green Party is welcoming Climate Change Minister Simon Wattsâ continuation of Hon. James Shawâs cross-party work on climate adaptation, now in the form of a Finance and Expenditure Committee Inquiry. ...1 week ago
- Release: Sexual violence prevention among hundreds of job cuts at ACCThe National Government plans to cut 390 jobs at ACC, including roles in the areas of prevention of sexual violence, road safety and workplace safety. ...1 week ago
- Government shows allergy to evidence in benefits crackdownThe Government has been caught in opposition to evidence once again as it looks to usher in tried, tested and failed work seminar obligations for job-seeking beneficiaries. ...1 week ago
- Minister of Finance reheats austerity politicsThis morningâs pre-Budget speech from the Minister of Finance offered no âmeaningfulâ news on the Governmentâs trickle-down economics based plans. ...1 week ago
- A win for Wellington – Greens welcome more housingThe Green Party is welcoming the announcement by the Minister Responsible for RMA Reform Chris Bishop to approve most of the Wellington City Councilâs District Plan recommendations. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Backtrack on school lunches a win for Kiwi kidsDavid Seymour has failed to get the sweeping cuts he wanted to the free and healthy school lunch programme, Labour education spokesperson Jan Tinetti said. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Hon Willie Jackson to debate at the Prestigious Oxford UnionHon Willie Jackson has been invited by the Oxford Union to debate the motion âThis House Believes British Museums are not Very Britishâ on May 23rd. ...2 weeks ago
- Members Bill will prevent MÄori land confiscationsGreen Party MP HĆ«hana Lyndon says her Public Works (Prohibition of Compulsory Acquisition of MÄori Land) Amendment Bill is an opportunity to right some past wrongs around the alienation of MÄori land. ...2 weeks ago
- TIKANGA IS NOT LAW. IT IS CULTURAL INDOCTRINATION.A senior, highly respected Kingâs Counsel with decades of experience in our law courts, Gary Judd KC, has filed a complaint about compulsory tikanga MÄori studies for law students - highlighting the utter depths of absurdity this woke cultural madness has taken our society. The tikanga regulations will compel law ...2 weeks ago
- Release: National wonât commit to full Nelson Hospital upgradeThe Government needs to be clear with the people of the Nelson Marlborough region about the changes it is considering for the Nelson Hospital rebuild, Labour health spokesperson Ayesha Verrall said. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour calls for fast track list to be releasedMinisters must front up about which projects it will push through under its Fast Track Approvals legislation, Labour environment spokesperson Rachel Brooking said today. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: National gaslights women fighting for equal payNational has scrapped the pay equity taskforce that fights for equal pay for women and looks at ethnic pay gaps. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: More job cuts, fewer houses under NationalThe Government is again adding to New Zealandâs growing unemployment, this time cutting jobs at the agencies responsible for urban development and growing much needed housing stock. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Children fall deeper through the cracks in Govt cutsWith Minister Karen Chhour indicating in the House today that she either doesnât know or care about the frontline cuts sheâs making to Oranga Tamariki, we risk seeing more and more of our children falling through the cracks. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour honours memory of Sir Robert MartinThe Labour Party is saddened to learn of the death of Sir Robert Martin, a globally renowned disability advocate who led the way for disability rights both in New Zealand and internationally. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: 130,000 cattle saved from live exportLabour is calling for the Government to urgently rethink its coalition commitment to restart live animal exports, Labour animal welfare spokesperson Rachel Boyack said. Â ...3 weeks ago
- Central Bank makes clear Government is pouring fuel on housing crisis fireTodayâs Financial Stability Report has once again highlighted that poverty and deep inequality are political choices - and this Government is choosing to make them worse. ...3 weeks ago
- New unemployment figures paint bleak pictureThe Green Party is calling on the Government to do more for our households in most need as unemployment rises and the cost of living crisis endures. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Nationalâs job cuts already starting to bite as unemployment risesUnemployment is on the rise and itâs only going to get worse under this Government, Labour finance spokesperson Barbara Edmonds said. Stats NZ figures show the unemployment rate grew to 4.3 percent in the March quarter from 4 percent in the December quarter. âThis is the second rise in unemployment ...3 weeks ago
- Release: National hiking transport costs for families and young New ZealandersWeekly expenses will grow for more than 1.6 million New Zealanders as the Government ends free and half price public transport fares tomorrow. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Labour welcomes EU free trade agreementThe New Zealand Labour Party welcomes the entering into force of the European Union and New Zealand free trade agreement. This agreement opens the door for a huge increase in trade opportunities with a market of 450 million people who are high value discerning consumers of New Zealand goods and ...3 weeks ago
- Surprise: Landlord tax cuts donât trickle downThe Green Party is renewing its call for rent controls following reports of rental prices hitting an all-time high. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: $1.7b for no increase in access to medicineThe National-led Government continues its fiscal jiggery pokery with its Pharmac announcement today, Labour Health spokesperson Ayesha Verrall says. âThe government has increased Pharmac funding but conceded it will only make minimal increases in access to medicineâ, said Ayesha Verrall âThis is far from the bold promises made to fund ...3 weeks ago
- Release: National should heed Tribunal warning and scrap coalition commitment with ACTThis afternoonâs interim Waitangi Tribunal report must be taken seriously as it affects our most vulnerable children, Labour childrenâs spokesperson Willow-Jean Prime. ...3 weeks ago
- New measures to protect powerlines from trees
Energy Minister Simeon Brown has announced that the Government will make it easier for lines firms to take action to remove vegetation from obstructing local powerlines. The change will ensure greater security of electricity supply in local communities, particularly during severe weather events. âTrees or parts of trees falling on ...1 day ago - Wairarapa Moana ki Pouakani win top MÄori dairy farming awardWairarapa Moana ki Pouakani were the top winners at this yearâs Ahuwhenua Trophy awards recognising the best in MÄori dairy farming. MÄori Development Minister Tama Potaka announced the winners and congratulated runners-up, WhakatĆhea MÄori Trust Board, at an awards celebration also attended by Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Finance Minister ...1 day ago
- DJ Fred Again â Assurance report received"On the 27th of March, I sought assurances from the Chief Executive, Department of Internal Affairs, that the Departmentâs correct processes and policies had been followed in regards to a passport application which received media attention,â says Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden. âI raised my concerns after being ...2 days ago
- District Court Judges appointedAttorney-General Judith Collins has announced the appointment of three new District Court Judges, to replace Judges who have recently retired. Peter James Davey of Auckland has been appointed a District Court Judge with a jury jurisdiction to be based at Whangarei. Mr Davey initially started work as a law clerk/solicitor with ...2 days ago
- Unions should put learning ahead of ideologyAssociate Education Minister David Seymour is calling on the Post Primary Teachersâ Association (PPTA) to put ideology to the side and focus on studentsâ learning, in reaction to the union holding paid teacher meetings across New Zealand about charter schools.⯠âŻÂ âThe PPTA is disrupting schools up and down the ...2 days ago
- Craig Stobo appointed as chair of FMACommerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly today announced the appointment of Craig Stobo as the new chair of the Financial Markets Authority (FMA). Mr Stobo takes over from Mark Todd, whose term expired at the end of April. Mr Stoboâs appointment is for a five-year term. âThe FMA plays ...2 days ago
- Budget 2024 invests in lifeguards and coastguardSurf Life Saving New Zealand and Coastguard New Zealand will continue to be able to keep people safe in, on, and around the water following a funding boost of $63.644 million over four years, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Associate Transport Minister Matt Doocey say. âHeading to the beach for ...2 days ago
- New Zealand and Tuvalu reaffirm close relationshipNew Zealand and Tuvalu have reaffirmed their close relationship, Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters says. âNew Zealand is committed to working with Tuvalu on a shared vision of resilience, prosperity and security, in close concert with Australia,â says Mr Peters, who last visited Tuvalu in 2019. âIt is my pleasure ...3 days ago
- New Zealand calls for calm, constructive dialogue in New CaledoniaNew Zealand is gravely concerned about the situation in New Caledonia, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. âThe escalating situation and violent protests in NoumĂ©a are of serious concern across the Pacific Islands region,â Mr Peters says. âThe immediate priority must be for all sides to take steps to de-escalate the ...3 days ago
- New Zealand welcomes Samoa Head of StatePrime Minister Christopher Luxon met today with Samoaâs O le Ao o le Malo, Afioga Tuimalealiifano Vaaletoa Sualauvi II, who is making a State Visit to New Zealand. âHis Highness and I reflected on our two countriesâ extensive community links, with SamoanâNew Zealanders contributing to all areas of our national ...3 days ago
- Island Direct eligible for SuperGold Card fundingTransport Minister Simeon Brown has announced that he has approved Waiheke Island ferry operator Island Direct to be eligible for SuperGold Card funding, paving the way for a commercial agreement to bring the operator into the scheme. âIsland Direct started operating in November 2023, offering an additional option for people ...3 days ago
- Further sanctions against RussiaForeign Minister Winston Peters today announced further sanctions on 28 individuals and 14 entities providing military and strategic support for Russiaâs invasion of Ukraine. âRussia is directly supported by its military-industrial complex in its illegal aggression against Ukraine, attacking its sovereignty and territorial integrity. New Zealand condemns all entities and ...3 days ago
- One year on from Loafers LodgeA year on from the tragedy at Loafers Lodge, the Government is working hard to improve building fire safety, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. âI want to share my sincere condolences with the families and friends of the victims on the anniversary of the tragic fire at Loafers ...3 days ago
- Pre-Budget speech to Auckland Business ChamberKa nui te mihi kia koutou. Kia ora and good afternoon, everyone. Thank you so much for having me here in the lead up to my Governmentâs first Budget. Before I get started can I acknowledge: Simon Bridges â Auckland Business Chamber CEO. Steve Jurkovich â Kiwibank CEO. Kids born ...4 days ago
- New Zealand and Vanuatu to deepen collaborationNew Zealand and Vanuatu will enhance collaboration on issues of mutual interest, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.  âIt is important to return to Port Vila this week with a broad, high-level political delegation which demonstrates our deep commitment to New Zealandâs relationship with Vanuatu,â Mr Peters says.  âThis ...4 days ago
- Penk travels to Peru for trade meetingsMinister for Land Information, Chris Penk will travel to Peru this week to represent New Zealand at a meeting of trade ministers from the Asia-Pacific region on behalf of Trade Minister Todd McClay. The annual Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) Ministers Responsible for Trade meeting will be held on 17-18 May ...4 days ago
- Minister attends global education conferencesMinister of Education Erica Stanford will head to the United Kingdom this week to participate in the 22nd Conference of Commonwealth Education Ministers (CCEM) and the 2024 Education World Forum (EWF). âI am looking forward to sharing this Governmentâs education priorities, such as introducing a knowledge-rich curriculum, implementing an evidence-based ...4 days ago
- Education Minister thanks outgoing NZQA ChairMinister of Education Erica Stanford has today thanked outgoing New Zealand Qualifications Authority Chair, Hon Tracey Martin. âTracey Martin tendered her resignation late last month in order to take up a new role,â Ms Stanford says. Ms Martin will relinquish the role of Chair on 10 May and current Deputy ...4 days ago
- Joint statement of Christopher Luxon and Emmanuel Macron: Launch of the Christchurch Call FoundationNew Zealand Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and President Emmanuel Macron of France today announced a new non-governmental organisation, the Christchurch Call Foundation, to coordinate the Christchurch Callâs work to eliminate terrorist and violent extremist content online.  This change gives effect to the outcomes of the November 2023 Call Leadersâ Summit, ...5 days ago
- Panel announced for review into disability servicesDistinguished public servant and former diplomat Sir Maarten Wevers will lead the independent review into the disability support services administered by the Ministry of Disabled People â Whaikaha. The review was announced by Disability Issues Minister Louise Upston a fortnight ago to examine what could be done to strengthen the ...5 days ago
- Minister welcomes Police gang unitTodayâs announcement by Police Commissioner Andrew Coster of a National Gang Unit and district Gang Disruption Units will help deliver on the coalition Governmentâs pledge to restore law and order and crack down on criminal gangs, Police Minister Mark Mitchell says. âThe National Gang Unit and Gang Disruption Units will ...5 days ago
- New Zealand expresses regret at North Koreaâs aggressive rhetoricForeign Minister Winston Peters has today expressed regret at North Koreaâs aggressive rhetoric towards New Zealand and its international partners. âNew Zealand proudly stands with the international community in upholding the rules-based order through its monitoring and surveillance deployments, which it has been regularly doing alongside partners since 2018,â Mr ...5 days ago
- New Chief of Defence Force appointedAir Vice-Marshal Tony Davies MNZM is the new Chief of Defence Force, Defence Minister Judith Collins announced today. The Chief of Defence Force commands the Navy, Army and Air Force and is the principal military advisor to the Defence Minister and other Ministers with relevant portfolio responsibilities in the defence ...5 days ago
- Government puts children first by repealing 7AALegislation to repeal section 7AA of the Oranga Tamariki Act has been introduced to Parliament. The Billâs introduction reaffirms the Coalition Governmentâs commitment to the safety of children in care, says Minister for Children, Karen Chhour. âWhile section 7AA was introduced with good intentions, it creates a conflict for Oranga ...5 days ago
- Defence Minister to meet counterparts in UK, ItalyDefence Minister Judith Collins will this week travel to the UK and Italy to meet with her defence counterparts, and to attend Battles of Cassino commemorations. âI am humbled to be able to represent the New Zealand Government in Italy at the commemorations for the 80th anniversary of what was ...5 days ago
- Charter schools to lift educational outcomesThe upcoming Budget will include funding for up to 50 charter schools to help lift declining educational performance, Associate Education Minister David Seymour announced today. $153 million in new funding will be provided over four years to establish and operate up to 15 new charter schools and convert 35 state ...5 days ago
- COVID-19 Inquiry terms of reference consultation results receivedâThe results of the public consultation on the terms of reference for the Royal Commission into COVID-19 Lessons has now been received, with results indicating over 13,000 submissions were made from members of the public,â Internal Affairs Minister Brooke van Velden says. âWe heard feedback about the extended lockdowns in ...6 days ago
- The Pacific family of nations – the changing security outlookForeign Minister, Defence Minister, other Members of Parliament Acting Chief of Defence Force, Secretary of Defence Distinguished Guests Defence and Diplomatic Colleagues Ladies and Gentlemen, Good afternoon, tÄna koutou, apinun tru  Itâs a pleasure to be back in Port Moresby today, and to speak here at the Kumul Leadership ...6 days ago
- NZ and Papua New Guinea to work more closely togetherHealth, infrastructure, renewable energy, and stability are among the themes of the current visit to Papua New Guinea by a New Zealand political delegation, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says. Â âPapua New Guinea carries serious weight in the Pacific, and New Zealand deeply values our relationship with it,â Mr Peters ...6 days ago
- Driving ahead with Roads of Regional SignificanceThe coalition Government is launching Roads of Regional Significance to sit alongside Roads of National Significance as part of its plan to deliver priority roading projects across the country, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. âThe Roads of National Significance (RoNS) built by the previous National Government are some of New Zealandâs ...6 days ago
- New Zealand congratulates new Solomon Islands governmentA high-level New Zealand political delegation in Honiara today congratulated the new Government of Solomon Islands, led by Jeremiah Manele, on taking office.  âWe are privileged to meet the new Prime Minister and members of his Cabinet during his governmentâs first ten days in office,â Deputy Prime Minister and ...7 days ago
- New Zealand supports UN Palestine resolutionNew Zealand voted in favour of a resolution broadening Palestineâs participation at the United Nations General Assembly overnight, Foreign Minister Winston Peters says.  âThe resolution enhances the rights of Palestine to participate in the work of the UN General Assembly while stopping short of admitting Palestine as a full ...1 week ago
- Speech to the 2024 Infrastructure SymposiumIntroduction Good morning. Itâs a great privilege to be here at the 2024 Infrastructure Symposium. I was extremely happy when the Prime Minister asked me to be his Minister for Infrastructure. It is one of the great barriers holding the New Zealand economy back from achieving its potential. Building high ...1 week ago
- $571 million for Defence pay and projectsDefence Minister Judith Collins today announced the upcoming Budget will include new funding of $571 million for Defence Force pay and projects. âOur servicemen and women do New Zealand proud throughout the world and this funding will help ensure we retain their services and expertise as we navigate an increasingly ...1 week ago
- Climate change â mitigating the risks and costsNew Zealandâs ability to cope with climate change will be strengthened as part of the Governmentâs focus to build resilience as we rebuild the economy, Climate Change Minister Simon Watts says. âAn enduring and long-term approach is needed to provide New Zealanders and the economy with certainty as the climate ...1 week ago
- Getting new job seekers on the pathway to workJobseeker beneficiaries who have work obligations must now meet with MSD within two weeks of their benefit starting to determine their next step towards finding a job, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. âA key part of the coalition Governmentâs plan to have 50,000 fewer people on Jobseeker ...1 week ago
- Accelerating Social InvestmentA new standalone Social Investment Agency will power-up the social investment approach, driving positive change for our most vulnerable New Zealanders, Social Investment Minister Nicola Willis says. âDespite the Government currently investing more than $70 billion every year into social services, we are not seeing the outcomes we want for ...1 week ago
- Getting Back on TrackCheck against delivery Good morning. It is a pleasure to be with you to outline the Coalition Governmentâs approach to our first Budget. Thank you Mark Skelly, President of the Hutt Valley Chamber of Commerce, together with your Board and team, for hosting me.  Iâd like to acknowledge His Worship ...1 week ago
- NZ â European Union ties more critical than everYour Excellency Ambassador Meredith, Â Members of the Diplomatic Corps and Ambassadors from European Union Member States, Â Ministerial colleagues, Members of Parliament, and other distinguished guests, Thank you everyone for joining us. Â Ladies and gentlemen -Â Â In diplomacy, we often speak of âcloseâ and âlong-standingâ relations. Â ...2 weeks ago
- Therapeutic Products Act to be repealedThe Therapeutic Products Act (TPA) will be repealed this year so that a better regime can be put in place to provide New Zealanders safe and timely access to medicines, medical devices and health products, Associate Health Minister Casey Costello announced today. âThe medicines and products we are talking about ...2 weeks ago
- Watch: Christopher Luxon speaks at National Party conference
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon will be talking at the Palmerston North Function Centre on Sunday morning. ...2 hours ago - Iwi Leaders Group united against Oranga Tamariki scrapping Treaty obligationsIf the government really wants Oranga Tamariki to continue working with MÄori groups, it should leave the law as it is, leader says. ...4 hours ago
- Government IT Systems Need A $800 Million Overhaul
The government is facing a bill of more than $800 million to overhaul back-office IT systems, and attempts to lessen its impact have hit delays. ...5 hours ago - Bolstering support for Asian personnel in the NZ Defence ForceThe founder of a Pan-Asian network in the New Zealand Defence Force hopes to support Asian personnel in their defence careers. ...5 hours ago
- 'Increasingly Activist' Waitangi Tribunal Faces Its Future Under Renewed Attack From Senio...David Seymour has renewed attacks on what he says is an 'increasingly activist' Tribunal as it faces questions about its future. ...6 hours ago
- An Ode to .. Shane Jones
Arawata Shane Arawata Shane had wandered long In the wild tangled hills of the West Coast. He came to a stop on the mighty range And looked down at the wide river flats. He breathed in the clean air, And he took in the shadows playing across The face of ...6 hours ago - Fijiâs Jo Nata reflects on the 2000 coup: âWe let the racism genie out of the bottleâ
SPECIAL REPORT: Islands Business in Suva Today is the 24th anniversary of renegade and failed businessman George Speightâs coup in 2000 Fiji. The elected coalition government headed by Mahendra Chaudhry, the first and only Indo-Fijian prime minister of Fiji, was held hostage at gunpoint for 56 days in the countryâs ...11 hours ago - Rule change to protect powerlines from being hit by treesEnergy Minister Simeon Brown wants a 'clear to the sky' zone to prevent vegetation hanging over lines. ...16 hours ago
- New Caledonia riots: Tear gas, stun grenades used as protesters swarm airport runwayBy Lydia Lewis, RNZ Pacific journalist and Kelvin Anthony, RNZ Pacific digital journalist Police have used tear gas and stun grenades on rioters at an airport near Nouméa as the chaos in New Caledonia stretched into its sixth day. Five people, including two police officers, have died and hundreds of ...18 hours ago
- Government faces further legal action over MÄori Health Authority axingIt is the second High Court action into the government's policies affecting MÄori. ...21 hours ago
- Kanaky New Caledonia: Amnesty calls on France to âuphold rightsâ of indigenous peopleAsia Pacific ReportThe global human rights watchdog Amnesty International has called on France to not âmisuseâ a crackdown in the ongoing unrest in the non-self-governing French Pacific territory of Kanaky New Caledonia in the wake of a controversial vote by the French Parliament to adopt a bill changing the territoryâs ...23 hours ago
- Revamped school lunches may be less healthy – principalA major provider of school lunches fears the government's new $3 limit for most students will see them eating more pre-packaged and processed food. ...1 day ago
- âStop laughing, Iâm trying to kill someoneâ: Cohen Holloway on playing a serial murderer
The star of Dark City: The Cleaner takes us through his life in TV, including the VHS revolution and the John Campbell impression that started it all. Best known for his comedic roles, Cohen Holloway says he struggled at times to maintain the stone cold facade of serial killer on ...1 day ago - A life storyDavid Hill remembers an old friend, who youâve probably never heard of. My friend Doug never travelled; he had little interest in the world beyond his own tiny rural town. Iâve rarely known anyone who radiated such contentment. Doug (Iâll call him that) died in March. You wonât know him. ...1 day ago
- Do you recognise anybody in these 150-year-old photographs?Some of the earliest photos of life in Aotearoa are on display at Auckland Museum right now â but the identities of some of the people in them are a mystery. What was it like to be one of the first people in New Zealand to have their photo taken? ...1 day ago
- The indie books fest bringing big ideas to small town WairarapaSince its founding almost a decade ago, Featherston Booktown has grown into one of the countryâs most interesting and idiosyncratic literary events. Erin Banks reports from the audience. âCome in, have you had lunch? Iâm about to make a cheese toastie.â Mary Biggs, operations manager of Featherston Booktown Karukatea Festival, ...1 day ago
- Enduring the voyage of the tatauAfter 33 years abroad, Loveni Enari recently returned to Aotearoa and Samoa in what a friend joked was an âexistential crisisâ. He learnt and re-learnt so much about his family, friends and both countries. Almost as an afterthought, he got a Samoan tatau. This is his story. (Accompanying it are ...1 day ago
- Bearing witness to a confession of murderNearly 30 years ago, two people told me theyâd killed a woman they knew. I thought the truth would come out, that others would tell it. In the end, I had to. The Sunday Essay is made possible thanks to the support of Creative New Zealand. Fact: in 1995, Angela Blackmoore ...1 day ago
- The Weekend: A landmark case for trans rights in AotearoaEditor Madeleine Chapman looks back at the week and shines a light on some increasingly rare longform journalism. MĆrena and welcome to The Weekend where there will sadly be no aurora to see. After a busy week last week of short, sharp pieces, this week we swung the other way, ...1 day ago
- Tourists trapped by New Caledonia unrest feel âabandonedâ by NZBy Lauren Crimp , RNZ News reporter New Zealanders stuck among riots and civil unrest in New Caledoniaâs capital say they feel abandoned by their own country, having received little help from the government. NoumĂ©a descended into chaos on Monday, with clashes between indigenous Kanak pro-independence protesters and French security ...1 day ago
- Kanaky in flames: Five takeaways from the New Caledonia independence riotsANALYSIS: By David Robie, editor of Asia Pacific Report Jean-Marie Tjibaou, a revered Kanak visionary, was inspirational to indigenous Pacific political activists across Oceania, just like Tongan anthropologist and writer Epeli Haoâofa was to cultural advocates. Tragically, he was assassinated in 1989 by an opponent within the independence movement during ...2 days ago
- When body positivity becomes problematicForget thin is in, apparently now bigger is better … or is it? After over a decade of body positivity, girls, teens and women are even more confused about what body positivity actually is. The movement began with women confronting unrealistic expectations of how their bodies should look. But sub-strands ...2 days ago
- Short story: Ruin, by Ockham winner Emma HislopGrace always sat at the bar at the back of The Cambridge, where she could watch who came in. A huge mirror ran the length of the pub, so you could sometimes watch people without them knowing. The mirror made the place seem a lot bigger than it really was. ...2 days ago
- The Secret Diary of .. Sheriff Mark MitchellMONDAY Sheriff Mark Mitchell rose at dawn. He had a long day’s ride ahead of him. He was headed for Waikeria. Waikeria! Even the name itself stirred his blood, and set root in his imagination. There was nothing and no one in Waikeria. But he would bend it to his ...2 days ago
- The Boy in the Water: A forensic examination, at lastThe first phase of the inquest into the death of Gore toddler Lachlan Jones finished this week, turning up plenty of revelations and few answers. But through all the confusion, heartbreak and antipathy on display, the simple fact at the heart of this case remains: if little Lachieâs body had ...2 days ago
- How Many Public Sector Roles Are Going, And From Where?Public servants' jobs are on the chopping block as the sector scrambles to meet the Finance Minister's cost-cutting targets. ...2 days ago
- Can you control your image? Gina Rinehart, King Charles and âmoral portraitsâSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Roger Benjamin, Professor in Art History, University of Sydney âSheâs no oil paintingâ. Those were the unkind words of a colleague commenting on the subject of Vincent Namatjiraâs acrylic painting, Gina. Every one of the prominent Australians and cultural heroes in Namatjiraâs ...2 days ago
- Government plans for MÄori wards breach The Treaty of Waitangi -TribunalGovernment plans to require local councils hold a referendum on whether to have MÄori wards breaches the Treaty of Waitangi, a Waitangi Tribunal report has found. ...2 days ago
- Threatened species have declined 2% a year since 2000. Nature positive? Far from it.Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Megan C Evans, Senior Lecturer, Public Sector Management, School of Business, UNSW Sydney Martin Tobias Aakesson/Shutterstock Our government has great aspirations. It has committed to end extinctions and expand our protected areas to cover 30% of every Australian ecosystem by 2030. ...2 days ago
- Rugby league in Perth and Papua New Guinea? Hereâs what could be next for the NRLSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Tim Harcourt, Industry Professor and Chief Economist, University of Technology Sydney This year the National Rugby League (NRL) opened its season in Las Vegas. It was an audacious move by the leagueâs ambitious head honcho Peter VâLandys to showcase the game in ...2 days ago
- The budget has earmarked $8.6 million for live music. Is it enough to save the flailing industry?Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Catherine Strong, Associate Professor, Music Industry, RMIT University Leading music organisations have praised the federal budget for its investment in the live music sector. The budget includes A$8.6 million for a program called Revive Live: to provide essential support to ...2 days ago
- The Week in Politics: Charter schools, special police units and a tricky problem for the governmentThe Week in Politics: ACT brings back a signature policy, while NZ First mulls how to fulfil a promise. ...2 days ago
- Thereâs $110 million for Indigenous education in the budget. But whereâs the evidence it will wo...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Marnee Shay, Associate Professor, Principal Research Fellow, The University of Queensland The 2024 federal budget contains A$110 million for Indigenous education. This includes funding for various different organisations to represent and help Indigenous people as well as scholarships in a bid to ...2 days ago
- New Caledoniaâs NoumĂ©a airport closed until Tuesday, says Air New ZealandAir New Zealand has confirmed NoumĂ©aâs Tontouta International airport in New Caledonia is closed until Tuesday. The airline earlier told RNZ it would update customers as soon as it could. Earlier today, Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters told RNZ Morning Report government officials had been working on an âhourly basisâ ...2 days ago
- Cameras reveal wombat burrows can be safe havens after fire and waterholes after rainSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Grant Linley, PhD Candidate in Ecology, Charles Sturt University Grant Linley Australiaâs unprecedented Black Summer bushfires in 2019â20 created ideal conditions for misinformation to spread, from the insidious to the absurd. It was within this context that a bizarre story ...2 days ago
- ChatGPT is now better than ever at faking human emotion and behaviourSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Marcel Scharth, Lecturer in Business Analytics, University of Sydney OpenAI executive Mira Murati launching GPT-4o. OpenAI Earlier this week OpenAI launched GPT-4o (âoâ for âomniâ), a new version of the artificial intelligence (AI) system powering the popular ChatGPT chatbot. GPT-4o is promoted ...2 days ago
- Menopause can bring increased cholesterol levels and other heart risks. Hereâs why and what to do ...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Treasure McGuire, Assistant Director of Pharmacy, Mater Health SEQ in conjoint appointment as Associate Professor of Pharmacology, Bond University and as Associate Professor (Clinical), The University of Queensland Speedkingz/Shutterstock Menopause is a natural biological process that marks the end of a ...2 days ago
- The Friday Poem: âXiÄngâ by Hannah PattersonA new poem by Hannah Patterson. XiÄng Thereâs a pear tree in our backyard And XiÄng tells me She canât eat them anymore Not after some things that have happened in her life. She tells me, in Mandarin The word for pear sounds the same as the word for disassociation ...2 days ago
- Cycle lanes are good for business, actuallyâCycling Worksâ aims to show business support for citywide cycle infrastructure. This is an excerpt from our weekly environmental newsletter Future Proof. Sign up here. Last week, supermarket giant Foodstuffs lost its attempt to block the construction of a cycle lane outside Thorndon New World in Wellington. The Spinoffâs Wellington editor ...2 days ago
- The Unity Books bestseller chart for the week ending May 17The only published and available best-selling indie book chart in New Zealand is the top 10 sales list recorded every week at Unity Booksâ stores in High St, Auckland, and Willis St, Wellington. AUCKLAND 1Â Slow Productivity by Cal Newport (Penguin, $40) Taking out the top spot in Auckland this ...2 days ago
- Nuclear subs are coming to Australia. Now the Coalition wants reactors, too. Weâre not ready for i...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Ian Lowe, Emeritus Professor, School of Environment and Science, Griffith University For decades, Australia has exported uranium â but not used it, other than in the Lucas Heights research reactor. But change is coming. We now face a rapidly deepening commitment to ...2 days ago
- After 180 years, new clues are revealing just how general anaesthesia works in the brainSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Adam D Hines, Research fellow, Queensland University of Technology Sergey Mironov/Shutterstock Over 350 million surgeries are performed globally each year. For most of us, itâs likely at some point in our lives weâll have to undergo a procedure that needs general ...2 days ago
- 'I can do much better': Green MP Julie Anne Genter promises to improve conduct"In future I should walk away," Green MP Julie Anne Genter says after complaints over an exchange in Parliament and from two members of the public. ...2 days ago
- Call to protect asylum seekers who may arrive in New Zealand by boatA group of more than 40 refugees, charities and advocates want better protections for asylum seekers arriving by boat. ...2 days ago
- Homo Pentecostus: on queer intimacies, religion, ancestry and the human need for connectionSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Jonathan Graffam, PhD Candidate in Theatre, Monash University Gianna Rizzo/Malthouse Music pumps; lights pulsate; two sweaty bodies sway together, touching, breathing in each otherâs scent. A male body framed by downlight restlessly shifts between stances and gestures. He undresses. The intensity ...2 days ago
- Want to be buried on your own land, at sea or in a forest? A guide to unconventional send-offsSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Sandra van der Laan, Professor of Accounting, University of Sydney Mtaya/Shutterstock At some point, you or someone else will need to make a decision about your âsend-offâ. Most Australians die in an institution, such as a hospital or aged care facility. ...2 days ago
- Vanuatu, MSG chief reaffirms support for FLNKS, blames France over unrestAsia Pacific Report Vanuatu Prime Minister Charlot Salwai â who is also Chairman of the Melanesian Spearhead Group â has reaffirmed MSGâs support of the pro-independence umbrella group Kanak and Socialist National Liberation Front (FLNKS) stance opposing the French governmentâs constitutional bill âunfreezingâ the New Caledonia Electoral Roll. It is ...2 days ago
- Blazing a trail: the Leonard family legacy in MÄori televisionProducer Susan Leonard remembers her father Ernie, a pioneer of MÄori television, and how his legacy lives on in Pathfinders. My father was a fabulous man. His name was Ernie Leonard and he started in TV in the 1970s when it was still glamorous â when TVNZ made behind the ...2 days ago
- Home detention for New Caledoniaâs unrest ringleaders, Tiktok bannedBy Patrick Decloitre, RNZ Pacific correspondent French Pacific desk, and Lydia Lewis, RNZ Pacific journalist The suspected ringleaders of the unrest in New Caledonia have been placed in home detention and the social network TikTok has been banned as French security forces struggle to restore law and order. The French ...2 days ago
- Review finds big increase in multi-year government spends, use not always justifiedMulti-year appropriations - which give the government authority to spend money without reapplying annually - are loosening Parliament's control of the public purse, auditor-general says. ...2 days ago
- $63.6m for Surf Life Saving and Coastguard in Budget 2024"New Zealand has a tragically high drowning toll," Transport Minister Simeon Brown said at the announcement. ...2 days ago
- Dr. Eric Chuah Standing For Mayor Of TaurangaDr. Eric Chuah who stood for a centrist NZ political party in the October 2023 NZ Elections for Maungakiekie Auckland will stand as a candidate for Tauranga City Council Ward of Matua-=Otumoetai and Mayor of Tauranga. ...2 days ago
- How to enjoy a comedy festival in your own loungeIf you canât get to the comedy fest, let us bring the comedy fest to you. This is an excerpt from our weekly pop culture newsletter Rec Room. Sign up here. The New Zealand International Comedy Festival is in full swing at the moment, with a veritable smorgasboard of comedy treats ...2 days ago
- Poll Shows Three Quarters Of Wellingtonians Oppose Airport SaleA new poll commissioned by Unions Wellington shows an overwhelming majority of Wellingtonians oppose the Councilâs plan to sell the 34% public stake in Wellington Airport. ...2 days ago
- $63.6m boost for Surf Life Saving and Coastguard in Budget 2024"New Zealand has a tragically high drowning toll," Transport Minister Simeon Brown said at the announcement. ...2 days ago
- Nearly 1300 homes on hold amid government reviewNewly released documents show building has been paused on 690 KiwiBuild homes and 593 market homes. ...2 days ago
- At the heart of the budget is the sad truth the economy is weak. Thatâs one reason inflation will ...Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Aruna Sathanapally, Chief Executive, Grattan Institute, Grattan Institute A central focus of this weekâs budget is the treasuryâs forecast for inflation. By this time next year, inflation is projected to be back within the Reserve Bankâs 2-3% target range. Inflation has ...2 days ago
- Denser housing can be greener too â hereâs how NZ can build better for biodiversitySource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Yolanda van Heezik, Professor of Ecology, University of Otago Getty Images Cities across Aotearoa New Zealand are trying to solve a housing crisis, with increasing residential density a key solution. But not everyone is happy about the resulting loss of natural ...2 days ago
- Clean energy slump â why Australiaâs renewables revolution is behind schedule, and how to fix itSource: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Alison Reeve, Deputy Program Director, Energy and Climate Change, Grattan Institute WDG Photo/Shutterstock For years, the electricity sector has been the poster child for emissions cuts in Australia. The sector achieved a stunning 26% drop in emissions over the past 15 ...2 days ago
- Itâs OK to ask a loved one if theyâre feeling suicidalItâs often the last thing people want to do, but asking someone if theyâre having suicidal thoughts is a critical first step to helping them. Content warning: this story discusses suicide and suicidal ideation. For a list of resources that can help if you or someone you know is feeling ...2 days ago
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Key too distracted by own reflection in a shiny surface to understand what’s going on, again.
McCaw: “Fuck off, Key, I’m talking to someone important, here.”
I’ll trade you that shiney thing for what’s in my hand
It was all Bernard’s fault. Nothing to do with me!
No John, I will not trade the Cup for a place on the party list.
Ayo Bernard, tell that clown beside you to stop tickling my palm or i’m gonna ram this cup in his face !
Withdraw the paw John!
Man, I can’t wait until Richie gets married…
I’m smiling, I’m waving I’ve won! I’ve won! Doh!
Spot the politician.
Two and a half men.
Key cops a feel.
Me too! Me too! Me too!
I have an email that says a Labour PM would have totally fucked this up.
đ
I have source all over my hand and can’t shake yours properly. Don’t ask me what source it is though… I’m the prime minster.
Thanks God helen Clark is not here, or she would have jinxed the game and the French would have their first RWC title
(Yes I know she was at the game – but not in any official capacity – But the curse of Clark is still evident and we were lucky for the positive luck of John Key to counter the Clark Curse)
Next you’ll be saying that it is all because she once menstruated.
I’m sure that all of that concentrated dislike of woman has simply rotted your brain to give that stupid Monty effect that we have all come to know and despise.
If this is a serious argument for John Key then National are truly in dire straits.
You do realize that the PM missed the end of the game because he was caught in a lift Monty? Perhaps he had to ask Helen Clark what happened.
John Key = X2 Credit downgrades, Christchurch no build, budget blowouts, mass exodus, high unemployment, high youth suicide, lying in parliament, Pike River broken promises and the Rena disaster non-response etc… most incompetent and unluckiest PM ever!
Helen Clark = Paintergate and different light bulbs. Looks like a jinx free zone to me.
He said he saw the last 3 minutes from the floor of the stadium.
Looks like they left ten minutes out… so Key missed around seven minutes at the end in his mad dash to do the three way hand shake and try to kiss the trotie!
1. Give all the All Blacks a hug.
2. Give Richie a handshake
3. Hold the cup aloft
4. Get a photo with the hooker’s arm around me
5. Get in the victory parades
6. Knight Richie
7. Get invited to Richie’s wedding
8. Sit as close as I can to the front of the wedding venue
9. Get another photo with Richie.
10. Steal the first kiss.
lol
Be Godfather for the fisrt born child, Bronagh can knit some boottees.
… be a Godfather? He has to be a believer first.
Can I hold the trotie?
If you don’t let me hold the troatie I’ll perform my troat-slitting gesture in Parliament again!
You misunderstand. Mr. Key was performing an abbreviated version of ‘Kapa O Pango’
Iâd rather talk about the epiphany, the moment of clarity captured by the camera where my awareness expanded encompassing the universe and how in that instant of time everything also compacted into oneness within me, a wonderful contradiction that astounded and inflamed my senses and opened my mind to the reality of our existence, our reason for being.
Yes Bishop John we know you just love talking about that stuff but what viewers really want to know is â how did you fuck up that handshake so bad, I mean come on, that was as bad as it gets â walk us through it.
(excuse my indulgence) đ
^ Bwahahahaha! Yes, walk us through your Kling-on homeboy handshake đ
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10761453
The Herald’s pathetic excuse for John Key’s handshake fumble is worth a read. Apparently John was “fully committed” to the handshake and couldn’t change his clumsiness lol
Here’s stuffs short piece on it:
http://www.stuff.co.nz/sport/rugby/5843753/Key-commits-World-Cup-handshake-faux-pas
They’re got in their little ticker in the top-right, so hopefully it’ll be more visibility than if it just fell off the end of the top stories.
http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/blogs/what-s-he-said/5847475/Our-embarrassing-uncle
Right – second attempt with link. Andrea Vance has now put up an appropriately titled blog post on Stuff covering the “handshake” and previous “Key moments”.
Almost an off-hand remark about the throat-slitting gesture that didn’t get much mainstream play at the time it actually happened.
Ritchie : who’s this fucker?
McCaw : I thought he was with you.
“MĂȘme Sarkozy n’est-ce pas dĂ©sespĂ©rĂ©e!”
Bugger!
Key grasping at McCaw’s paws.
Nothing beats using the secret reptilian Illuminati tri-shake in public while the peasants remain oblivious!
Key: “Pull my finger!”
^ Too funny.
“Paper… scissors… oh damn… protocol.”
In future will someone write a simple script for a simple PM to follow on such an occasion.
Mr Muddle muddles through.
By looking like an overeager fanboy about to shake hands with Richie McCaw Key has probably increased his preferred PM rating. There isn’t a Kiwi rugby fan in the world who isn’t thinking “fuck me, Key looks as excited as I feel, he really is one of us”.
I think “kiwi rugby fans” aren’t actually as big a majority as they like to imagine themselves.
Bullshit SHG.
There are plenty of fans thinking “Get out of the way of the heros of the day you dickhead”.
This Kiwi rugby fan saw a slimy politician who was so intent on getting his photo-op handshake in BEFORE McCaw lifted the cup, that he actually gate-crashed the other guys handshake, and wrestled two fingers out of his hand! (“Get the f*ck out of my way this is MY handshake bitch.”)
Have you ever in your life seen somene gate-crash a handshake like that?! No doubt Nat fans will applaud his ‘endearing goofiness’, I say he’s a nasty grasping dung-hole.
And this photo here… I mean… If this doesn’t say shameless photo-op junkie…
https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-awkward-moment-when-John-Key-goes-in-for-a-3-way-handshake/307639129249733?sk=wall#!/photo.php?fbid=10150896321555475&set=o.307639129249733&type=1&theater
Well i’m one Kiwi rugby fan who isn’t thinking that at all. I’m thinking, long after the dust settles and Richie’s raising of the cup goes down in history, as David Kirks holding the trophy aloft has, there will still be Key monging a handshake and embarassing ordinary NZers with his fuckwit glory seeking, media whoring antics.
fuck what a loser !!!
Group hug guys?
Key goes for the handshake too early, a bit like The Standard’s post on the PREFU, eh đ
John Kweewee!
Key goes for triple handshake — before he nails the triple downgrade.
One of these men is not like the other,
One of these men just doesn’t belong.
Premature shakeulation…
ewwww.
What we didn’t see just after the handshake
Those two pictures of Key grabbing the cup say it all! Note that Bernard and Richie are looking directly at one another and not at Key.
“I’m hoping that post-referendum handshakes will have two less parties than this one.”
Guy at the back:: Key you wanker, what about the oil on the beaches?
Getting an early start as Minister of Innovation. Time saving tip #1 3 way handshake.
Monsieur Lop Asset meets the Chairmain of the RWC and All Black captain Richie McCaw.
Phew! Richie, I just caught your hand in time.
I know you want to badly slap him. We all do.
But, just try and keep your hand down, at least for now.
The Moment John Realised He’s Wasn’t Doing The “Secret Mason” Handshake
Colonel Klink look-a-like crashes rugby world cup victory party.
me myself and I.
Shake it..i’m feeling Good !!!
Pull the finger!!…. Pull the finger!!….
Key: “My precious trotie… give it to meeee!”
McCaw: “Keep your dirty filthy hands off my trophy.”
“Slippery Huh! and he’s looking for a new job!”
Key: “ME TOO!!!”
Thoughts of National Campaign Manager, Steve Joyce, while watching this on TV: “Oh,  Fuck Me !!!, Well, that’s 50,000 votes down the friggin drain, isn’t it !!! Jesus, Key, you are a Fucking Liability !!!”
Richie: (shuddering) “Why does this bloke reek of oil and rotting seabirds? I feel so *unclean*!!! It’ll take ages to wash that off!!!”